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Dysfunctional Nuts
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.51841
53658
Can the party avoid tearing each-other's throat out? Can they successfully complete the dungeon and rid Port Barry of the giant glass octahedron that sits motionless a short way off the docks? Will GM have an aneurysm from it all?

Welcome back to the Nuts RP thread, where new faggots (players) are always welcome and previous faggots interact based increasingly loosely on D&D 3.5e core rules.

This thread begins with Thez completing a marvelous and unplanned concert now that she can cast "Dancing lights!" again, and a large crowd has formed around the square, where both Infernius and Trump appear to be intending to address the crowd, Thez having vacated the impromptu stage with several bouquets of flowers and adoring cheers from the crowd.
She has obscene skill pertaining to "Perform"
1780 replies and 206 files omitted.
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.53187
53189 53218
>>53186
"Why, that would be quite lovely," she says, throwing back her hood, revealing the face of a very comely female of Torcuil's faggot's preference, cuz what do I know about what you'd/he'd prefer?.
"Don't mind the robe, its a tool of office. Underneath it all I'm quite human(?), though immortal so long as I maintain the position.
No worries, I'm leaving in a minute
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53188
53191
Tracy goes to feed her birds and clean them for parasites.
Anonymous
dESWr
?
No.53189
53192
image.jpeg
>>53187
Trumpaladin starts calculating
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.53190
53193
>inb4 players go off the rails while I'm gone
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53191
53194 53202
>>53188
I dont think jews infect birbs.
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53192
53202
>>53189
Did she ever give him back his cup?
C6gcl
?
No.53193
53195
[1d20 = 3]
>>53190
Rolling to come up with the concept of steampunk.
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53194
>>53191
Better just to make sure.
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.53195
53196
>>53193
Dude, way more than cars and radios (yes, they DO have those), Gnomes = Steampunk
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53196
53197 53198 53199
>>53195
*inferior Minotuar noises*
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53197
53202
>>53196
You get buffed stats and like four or five extraordinary abilities. Minotaurs are beefy creatures.
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.53198
>>53196
Not inferior, just late to the game (no pun intended). Also, if not for a 3, I'd let him run with it. Just because the concept exists doesn't mean that he can't come up with ideas which may or may not be implemented elsewhere, but which could still benefit himself and the party.
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.53199
53200 53201
>>53196
Thez kisses Infernius, cuz he's adorable.
Later folks, have a good afternoon
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53200
>>53199
You too m8
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53201
>>53199
Later
Anonymous
dESWr
?
No.53202
53203 53205 53208
>>53197
Half Orc

>>53192
She never did. He did switch armor though

>>53191
Not everything is Jews
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53203
>>53202
You say that but you dont see behind the paper curtain.
dESWr
?
No.53204
53206 53207
[1d20 = 2]
Rolling to steal pony
PHGLm
?
No.53205
53207 53213
[1d20+21 = 34]
>>53202
Sleight of Hand to steal new cup.
Anonymous
dESWr
?
No.53206
>>53204
Aww
C6gcl
?
No.53207
53209 53213
[1d20 = 8]
>>53204
>>53205
*grapples and hands to brad*
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53208
>>53202
>half-orc
Eh, GM let him use his natural weapons, and half of the things I mentioned still stand.


Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53209
53210
>>53207
You have to roll Spot to notice it before you try to disarm.
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53210
53211
>>53209
I eas grappling the pony
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53211
53213
>>53210
Why though? He wouldn't have noticed her take it, and I forgot to add the +4 modifier for heavy clothing to conceal it.
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53212
53213
>no response
Tracy makes herself busy on a Wand of True Strike.
Anonymous
dESWr
?
No.53213
>>53205
Reeeee! Bad pony!

>>53207
"D'aww, thanks"

>>53211
Tracy ended last night grappled by Infernius, so it makes sense

>>53212
She can't, she's been stolen
PHGLm
?
No.53214
53215 53216
[1d20+24 = 39]
Escape Artist check
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53215
>>53214
Now she goes and does that.
C6gcl
?
No.53216
53217
[1d20 = 15]
>>53214
Regrapple
"Show brad you love him little pony."
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53217
53219 53257
>>53216
You'll have to catch her first
"Reeee! Don't come near me!"
*runs away*
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.53218
>>53187
Torc takes note of the though immortal so long as I maintain the position
He then leads her to the nicest restaurant in Port Barry
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53219
53221 53224
>>53217
"So you dont love brad?!?"
Anonymous
dESWr
?
No.53220
Trumpaladin lays down again on the couch, sad, and burrows his head into a pillow
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53221
>>53219
She mostly just doesn't want to get grappled again.
"What?" she implores from ~40 ft away
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.53222
53223
Praise Epona
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53223
>>53222
Checked
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.53224
53226
>>53219
Trumpaladin looks up at Infernius from his position lying down on the couch. There are the formations of tears in his eyes
"I have you, don't I?"
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53226
53227
>>53224
"Brad even though we have different ways, Infernuis considers you brother."
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.53227
53228
>>53226
"That's not quite what I had in mind"
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53228
53229 53230
>>53227
"What you mean?"
*sits next to sad paladin*
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.53229
>>53228
I'm curious too
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.53230
53231
>>53228
Trumpaladin sits up, looks at Infernius and smiles
"I'm very impressed by your heart - your dedication and commitment"
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53231
53251
>>53230
"Thanks, me am impressed about you fixing port barry. To be honest me a little jealous of how much the people love you."
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53232
53233 53234 53257
Do y'all have plans for this weekend? I don't...
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.53233
>>53232
Can't say that I do
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.53234
>>53232
i should be mostly free.
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.53235
53236 53237
The drama going on in staff chat is funny as fuck
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.53236
>>53235
Gibe screencaps
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.53237
>>53235
Please do. Does it have to do with a green filly?