Can the party avoid tearing each-other's throat out? Can they successfully complete the dungeon and rid Port Barry of the giant glass octahedron that sits motionless a short way off the docks? Will GM have an aneurysm from it all?
Welcome back to the Nuts RP thread, where new faggots (players) are always welcome and previous faggots interact based increasingly loosely on D&D 3.5e core rules.
This thread begins with Thez completing a marvelous and unplanned concert now that she can cast "Dancing lights!" again, and a large crowd has formed around the square, where both Infernius and Trump appear to be intending to address the crowd, Thez having vacated the impromptu stage with several bouquets of flowers and adoring cheers from the crowd.
She has obscene skill pertaining to "Perform"
1780 replies and 200 files omitted.
>>52754Torc offers Death a drink.
>>52763*Sucks more and more energy out of the Paladin, drinking generously from his well of power*[Happy Fiend noises]
"~Hmmmm...! That's right; let it all out into me, Flashy.. Good boy.."
*Hind muscles vibrate with enhanced fervor*
>>52767"Ah fuck" Trumpaladin cries out, as he is no match for the muscular contractions of the mighty horse
*more fluid he didn't know he still had escapes from him* >>52769Okay, that's it. I'm going to ask the developers if there is some sort of curse on your IP
>>52770"Yes, yes, YES! Give me more..!"
*Bounces up and down repeatativly, mimicking the motions of a water pump*
>>52773*sneaks in hand to perform lay of hands on own penis to prevent it from entirely falling off*
*rubs horse vagina with other hand just because sexy*
[1d20 = 13]>>52768*drinks somemore dead soviet*
>>52778"Try to cheer up. I mean, I hope you do," Thez says as GM prepares to depart.
[1d20 = 15]
Strength check to lift up demon horse
>>52777Tracy puts on a look of ecstasy as she crackles with energy, and strangely seems somewhat bigger than she was before, although Brad dismisses it as a figment of his imagination.
"At least now we don't have to worry about you outliving me." she says in horse-speech, too quietly to hear
>>52780"Are you uncomfortable, Flashy?"
*lifts one enormous, soft rump-cheek, as to allow him the space to escape if he so desired*
>>52784I was just rolling because everyone else was.
>>52785Hey since Infernuis lived among hores he know hores right?
Also did you watch hellstorm?
>>52787No, that was common.
Horse speech is a sekrit language, like druidic: you'll lose your pony magick if you teach it to a non-pony.
>did you watch hellstorm?Tracy's faggot was unlucky ennough to catch the flu on top of whatever the hell else has been ravishing his body, and ended up sleeping most of the day. I'll watch it when I discover the energy to give it the attention it deserves.
>>52785*escapes from demon horse*
"Well What was that about?!"
>>52790*nuzzles chest affectionately*
"I was just thinking how lucky we are to be together for the rest your our lives, Flashy."
[appreciative pony noises]
Wait a minute, if Torc couldn't cast 9th level spells, how did we defeat the Tarrasque in the first place?
*shoots self for for being an insufferable rulecuck*
>>52791*suspicious and nervous stare*
>>52795Yeah, I remember.
It's still alive anyway I guess.
[1d20+27 = 42]
Trumpaladin does a full sense motive on demon horse
>>52797*nuzzles*
Trumpaladin gets a hunch that Tracy feels like going outside to practice her acrobatics, and she's like him to ride her.
>>52798Trumpaladin is not at all assuaged, but he mounts the horse. What else could he do?
He sings to himself:
"'cause they've got to ride forever on that range up in the sky. On horses snortin' fire... as they ride on hear their cry"
>>52799Make a ride check to begin performing.
>Torc quickly feels uncomfortble having Death stare at him doing nothing.
Meanwhile, Snek finishes recharging the staff and heads back towards Torc
Idk if you add his ride check to her performance, because the rules are unclear when using a trained animal to perform, but either way, it's an Extraordinary performance.
>>52805*does back-flips and barrel rolls and skywriting and all that cool stuff*
>>52806*Trumpaladin contemplates just where in his life he went wrong*
>>52809"H-hey Brad look at me,I'm a pickle brad."
*hick*
>>52812Pic
>>52813"What do you want horsey?"
>>52814>wants to throw him off of her back and molest him in front of the crowd that just gathered"Nothing, just glad to be with you today."