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Dysfunctional Nuts
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.51841
53658
Can the party avoid tearing each-other's throat out? Can they successfully complete the dungeon and rid Port Barry of the giant glass octahedron that sits motionless a short way off the docks? Will GM have an aneurysm from it all?

Welcome back to the Nuts RP thread, where new faggots (players) are always welcome and previous faggots interact based increasingly loosely on D&D 3.5e core rules.

This thread begins with Thez completing a marvelous and unplanned concert now that she can cast "Dancing lights!" again, and a large crowd has formed around the square, where both Infernius and Trump appear to be intending to address the crowd, Thez having vacated the impromptu stage with several bouquets of flowers and adoring cheers from the crowd.
She has obscene skill pertaining to "Perform"
1780 replies and 203 files omitted.
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.52715
>>52711
[Happy pony noises]
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.52716
52719
>>52710
"pretty much"
>>52712
"A moving picture with sound"
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.52717
52720
>>52709
Time travel doesn't create paradoxes, GM does. ^_^
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.52718
52724
See, now I'm curious: I wanna see what would happen.
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.52719
52721
>>52716
*confused Minotuar noises*
"What?"
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.52720
>>52717
Im sure nothing major will happen
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.52721
52723
>>52719
Torc slams his head into the bar.
"Forget it"
Mrs. Sentry
PHGLm
?
No.52722
52724
>>52698
*Backs rump into paladin*
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.52723
52725
>>52721
"Oh you mean talmud vision"
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.52724
52726 52727 52728 52729
>>52718
If it didn't happen, then Thez wouldn't have had pity sex with Infernius that night. Which I believe is the sex that got her pregnant. So Adolphina Preston would not exist, although thez probably would have gotten pregnant later anyways. Tracy would have never coerced brad into proposing to her. So Brad would be single, and probably would have progressed further down Operation Waifu as originally intended, which means Slovenia would be pretty much a girlfriend. Infernius would have never gone down the darth path - probably. There would be no mission to save infernius - no cool gear, no raid of the court city. Possibly that means the court city would never have attacked

>>52722
*moves into pony*
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52725
26e.jpg
>>52723
This, kek
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52726
52730
>>52724
>Tracy would have never coerced brad into proposing to her. So Brad would be single
lol no
I had plenty of other cards tonplay
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.52727
>>52724
>pity sex
"REEEEEEEEEEE"
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52728
52730
>>52724
*Clenches and winks on paladin*
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.52729
52730 52731
>>52724
Torc wouldn't have met death
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.52730
52732
>>52726
The event forced your hand though, that's for sure

>>52729
I was about to add that

I am not sure if that whole mess of events surrounding Trollestia would have taken place

>>52728
"Good horsey!"
*tries to withhold ejaculating*
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52731
52733
>>52729
You should go on a date with her some time.
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52732
52737
>>52730
*Oozes and clams all over him, hind legs shuddering*
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.52733
52735 52736
>>52731
GM won't tell me how to contact her
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.52734
52739
This is the worst timeline though.
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52735
52748
>>52733
>[Distinct metallic clink of Snek holding a loaded gun to Torc's head]
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.52736
52748
>>52733
kys
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.52737
52740
>>52732
"I love you horsey"
*ejaculates a little*
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.52738
Torcuil, that is
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52739
52741
>>52734
*Worst timeline so far.
We can make it better though.
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52740
52743
>>52737
"I love you too, Flashy."
*Suction increases*
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.52741
52742
>>52739
I doubt it, seems like its gonna get alot grim darker.
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52742
52744
>>52741
Be more optimistic
GTyOx
?
No.52743
52745
Hello there little pony.jpg
[1d20+31 = 39]
>>52740
Trumpaladin uses the full power of his seduction on the horsey
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.52744
52746
>>52742
Im sure theyll get better for you guys and thez but this universe seems to hate me.
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52745
52747
>>52743
"Ooooooooooh..! Oh, Flashy..!"
*Sits back on paladin*
"I want to feel all of you!"
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.52746
52753
>>52744
Do you mean meatspace or game?
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.52747
52749
>>52745
*moves penis around to makes sure she's feeling all of it*

"Alright then"
*flexes hands*
*rubs all over horse rear*
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.52748
52750 52752
>>52735
>[distinct scream of a scared scottish mage]
>>52736
No u
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52749
52751
>>52747
*Grinds horse rear all over body*
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52750
>>52748
Do it, coward!
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.52751
52755
>>52749
*grinds Paladin front inside of horsey*
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.52752
52754
>>52748
"You?! What're YOU doing?" Death peeks out of the shadows.
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.52753
52756 52757
>>52746
Game space.
Anonymous
LJZcR
?
No.52754
52765
>>52752
>[another distinct scream]
"Oh, Hey Death!"
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52755
52756
>>52751
*Puts all of her Str and weight into grinding down on him, her plot completely eclipsing his world*
GTyOx
?
No.52756
52759
>>52753
I'd hug your character, but the two are far away and Trumpaladin made the mistake of trying to seducing Tracy

>>52755
reeeeee

Trumpaladin's energy slowly escapes from his body in liquid form, sucked into the titanic horse vagina and plot above him
\r
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.52757
52758 52762
>>52753
I can't speak for the dice, but I do think you're looking at it from the wrong perspective.
C6gcl
?
No.52758
52762
[1d20 = 8]
>>52757

Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52759
52760
every-womans-nightmare-trump-as-incubus-800.jpg
>>52756
[Happy succubus-pony noises]
*Absorbs life-energy from paladin*
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.52760
52761
>>52759
"Reeeeeee bad horsey, bad!"
Anonymous
PHGLm
?
No.52761
52763
midwinterain__s_nightmare_horse_by_xxxthepretentiousxxx-d4ynyzl.png
>>52760
"~Hmmmmph..! When I'm with you, I feel so much more.. powerful."
*Grinds further into paladin, trying to milk out more of the sweet stuff*
Anonymous
C6gcl
?
No.52762
52764
>>52758
>>52757
See
Anonymous
GTyOx
?
No.52763
52767
>>52761
Trumpaladin reeees in futility, as still more of his essence is sucked out into the pony, and swallowed up by her
Anonymous
BK2bC
?
No.52764
52766
>>52762
What does that mean?