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Creative Title Referencing Nuts
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.44896
44905
What it is? Its an ongoing thread-based fantasy RPG
What it do? Players do their thing based off dice scripts and 3.5e D&D as a rules baseline.

Throughout the week we shitpost at one another and on weekends we kill shit or surmount some form of obstacle. New players always welcome.

The party currently has a trebuchet, a series of cannons, and an airship with another series of cannons aimed at a floating black pyramid just out from the docks of Port Barry. Its not actually a pyramid, its an octahedron, but its half submerged. Some quick thinking from the resident Mage kept it from teleporting away and escaping, and now the party is looking to crack that bitch open and see what sorta toys are inside. And kill shit.
1398 replies and 129 files omitted.
Mrs. Sentry
T2++T
?
No.45256
45257
>>45253
>we have to deal with these ones first
The generals could probably handle them.
Let's not burn time.
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45257
45264
>>45256
Just calm the fuck down and let's kill these
1nDFl
?
No.45258
45259
[1d20 = 4]
Thez takes a grazing bite as she speeds toward the pyramid.
Now Slovenia can fire spread-shot (please declare this sorta thing in advance, so the crew can conceivably change munition in the same round)
1s5P2
?
No.45259
45260 45263
[1d20 = 15]
>>45258
Spread shot towards Right side

(I thought it was the trebuchet's default?)
1s5P2
?
No.45260
45261 45263 45264 45288
[14d20 = 206]
>>45259
Plus 14 other rocks
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45261
45262
>>45260
>That set of rolls
Holy shit
Anonymous
4k+jL
?
No.45262
>>45261
Thats actually pretty fucking impressive.
Hats off to you
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45263
45267
>>45259
I assumed a single rock was the default.
>>45260
e_e We'll consider those the archer's shots, cuz it would be a waste otherwise.
Allips and Vargouilles fall left and right, as the archers continue to pepper them with shots. Most of the advancing enemies are kill or almost. The only pressing threat now is the continuous flow from the hole in the pyramid.
Mrs. Sentry
T2++T
?
No.45264
45265
>>45257
[frisky nightmare noises]
>'These things are squishy, ~Flashy..! Let's cut into the meat already.'
*Blows cone of smoke in excitement*
>>45260
That outta finish them.
Now let's dive into this sexy dungeon.
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45265
45267
>>45264
>"Fine!"
1s5P2
?
No.45266
45268 45271
[3d20 = 21]
Fae pounces a Head
Mrs. Sentry
T2++T
?
No.45267
45270 45271
>>45263
*Tracy charges into the hole, projecting her smoke cone ahead of her, whinnying in excitement*
>>45265
[happy nightmare noises]
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45268
>>45266
>Not great dice rolls
Uh, her modifier should be +20 +18 +18
T2++T
?
No.45270
[1d20+21 = 29]
>>45267
Rolling to Spot anything bigger lurking inside the hole ahead of time.
>>45269
*draws sword and kills squishy targets*
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45271
45272 45279
>>45267
Hold your,... self. There's a mob of heads and tails coming out of it still, unless you're attempting an overrun.
>>45266
Nom nom

Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45272
45273
>>45271
>Unless you're attempting an overrun
I'm betting yes

Are the Spartans or Gestapo rated as archers?
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45273
>>45272
Not that I'm aware of
Anonymous
1KuxI
?
No.45274
45275 45278
>>45115
"Hey guys me groin stoped hurting, me ready to fight.
i didnt have to drive as far as i thought i did.
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45275
45276
15444__safe_screencap_princess luna_luna eclipsed_adorkable_animated_cute_huzzah_lunabetes_solo.gif
>>45274
HUZZAH!

Come in and kill shit
Anonymous
1KuxI
?
No.45276
45277 45281
>>45275
Tldr what am i killing?
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45277
45280
>>45276
Infernius can't teleport, he's still in the tower. Xp
Anonymous
4k+jL
?
No.45278
45288
>>45274
YAY, THE CLERIC IS BACK
Mrs. Sentry
T2++T
?
No.45279
>>45271
>unless you're attempting an overrun
Sure. Trample the fuckers.
*blows smoke to fuck-up their attack rolls*
>*stompy-stompy*
Anonymous
1KuxI
?
No.45280
>>45277
*Sprints towards the exit*
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45281
45282
>>45276
It's like Vargoilles? Flying undead coming out like bats. Also check out this kiss ass set of rolls I got rolling for the Generals >>45260. I tried to make it a multi-shot for a trebuchet but GM reassigned it to the archers

Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45282
>>45281
>Kiss ass
Lol. Kick ass
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45283
45284 45286 45288
Alright. Not to dial things back or anything, but as soon as Trump goes ahead and turns these bitches, the entrance to the pyramid is secure. No casualties or injuries were sustained (except Thez of all ppl) and most importantly, no one got kissed or wisdom drained (they do that btw).
Anonymous
4k+jL
?
No.45284
>>45283
Torc flys to the hole in the wall
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45285
For the record, that was my only question; do the citizens and militia take any status ailments, injuries, or casualties. That the party was gonna mob on them was a given.
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45286
45287
>>45283
TURNS UNDEAD!
1nDFl
?
No.45287
45289
[1d20 = 2]
>>45286

Anonymous
1KuxI
?
No.45288
45290
>>45283
What happened to muh waifu?
>>45260
Top Rolls.
>>45278
It is i cleric bull
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45289
>>45287
That is either very good or very bad

Uh... I think the circlet of persuasion adds +3 to turn checks?
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45290
45291
>GM assumes that he can forego looking at the fine details of undead turning and just roll
>2
Every time
>>45288
She charged through/around the vargs and got bitten trying to engage at the entrance.

Okkay good, the turning check still worked. Vargs shrivel up and collapse with creepy shrieks, and the Allips evaporate.
As usual, the Port Barry citizens are overjoyed and start cheering, meanwhile the dungeon beckons.
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45291
45292
>>45290
Turns back to blow a kiss at the cheering citizens, heroically waves, and then enters the dungeon
Anonymous
1KuxI
?
No.45292
45293 45299
>>45291
Reeee wait for me.
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45293
>>45292
I'm sorry, but this was the best I could do to hold back Tracy's Faggot. He's so impatient he didn't even want to kill this wave of enemies
Anonymous
4k+jL
?
No.45294
45296
"Hello everyone, we doing this?"
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45295
45297 45301 45310 45346
entrance.png
The entry to the pyramid is a wide open and spacious room. Decayed remains of ancient corpses are strewn everywhere, many without heads. This room hasn't been touched by anything living in,... at all? The stench of death and decay is almost nauseating, and aside from a massive pillar in the center, there are two sets of staircases leading down on either side of it.
1s5P2
?
No.45296
45298 45300 45305
[1d20 = 4]
[1d20 = 7]
>>45294
Fae does spot and listen check
Anonymous
4k+jL
?
No.45297
45302
>>45295
"Well this is fucked up. Whose going in in first?"
Anonymous
1s5P2
?
No.45298
>>45296
Uh... +15 modifiers on each
T2++T
?
No.45299
45304
[1d20+25 = 41]
>>45292
You'll catch up soon enough.
Better for Tracy to go first, with her Trap Sense.

Rolling Search to check for Traps, hazards, or hidden treasure, upon entering the room.
T2++T
?
No.45300
45311
[1d20+21 = 40]
[1d20+21 = 23]
>>45296
Tracy does the same
Mrs. Sentry
T2++T
?
No.45301
45303 45305
>>45295
"..I have to say, this place doesn't look half bad."
Mrs. Sentry
T2++T
?
No.45302
45312
>>45297
*pushes past*
1s5P2
?
No.45303
45305 45306
[1d20 = 19]
Trumpaladin does search check

Target is "What the fuck did this room used to be?" Greater description of room

>>45301
*glares*
Anonymous
1KuxI
?
No.45304
45306 45307
>>45299
*Sad faggot noises*
Anonymous
1nDFl
?
No.45305
45309 45311 45313
>>45296
"I can hear bones clacking against the ground, shifting sounds, some liquid sounds, lots of moaning and spoopy sounds,... nothing immediate however."
>>45301
kek
>>45303
It almost looks like a courtyard or a rooftop, except for being inside.
Mrs. Sentry
T2++T
?
No.45306
45308 45309
>>45303
*quizical stare*
"You're not afraid, are you, Flashy?"
>>45304
You'll get there in minutes on Utachit.
Infernius has Natural Cunning too, so he'll catch up to the party in no time in the dungeon.