What it is? Its an ongoing thread-based fantasy RPG
What it do? Players do their thing based off dice scripts and 3.5e D&D as a rules baseline.
Throughout the week we shitpost at one another and on weekends we kill shit or surmount some form of obstacle. New players always welcome.
The party currently has a trebuchet, a series of cannons, and an airship with another series of cannons aimed at a floating black pyramid just out from the docks of Port Barry. Its not actually a pyramid, its an octahedron, but its half submerged. Some quick thinking from the resident Mage kept it from teleporting away and escaping, and now the party is looking to crack that bitch open and see what sorta toys are inside. And kill shit.
1348 replies and 124 files omitted.
Read magic will only enable the words to be comprehensible; it doesn't give any indication of what the purpose is.>>46319
It would give bonuses to detect magical objects, but only a rogue can detect that
an object is a trap if the trap is DC15+ (I think)
Death wrote her number on the star card, disabling the magic of it.>>46320
Torcuil had left at that point, it can't be considered a fair challenge
I thought you were a wizard for about four months. Anyways, you've never been policed for the number of spells you can know or cast, but I need more charisma to take epic leadership, great smiting (necessary for the Epic prestige class I want), or to have better leadership scores and saving throws>>46322
Nigger, you sit here and play Home shopping network all goddamn day and you steal shit for the sake of stealing shit. Let me claim a tome if it's of charisma or strength>>46323
Bull shit, the very next post after I claimed it was a post from him, and he was active before that
Thank you for the actual answer
Plus I have snek rogue.>>46325>posts
If you look at time, you will notice I posted this morning. And I said I was going to sleep. Checkm8
My mistake, I had thought he left by that point.
Also, don't let me forget, King Doot had some magnificent half-plate, a cloak, a ring, and a brooch.
Fuckwit, did I say "read magic"? No. I said "read all languages" which is referring to the first level cleric spell "comprehend languages" which Fae can cast
It was posted last night and you posted after that. You just forgot that you saw it>>46327
I'm guessing we'll need to wait until later to find out what those things are?
Torc has 18 ranks in decipher script an diligent as a feat. Diligent adds +2 to decipher script>>46327
Also see >>46326
Identify as a spell takes 1 hour to cast. Analyze dweomer is instant, but is a 6th level spell
I guess we'll wait until later to figure out what we have then
Too late, I saw it. It was saucy, and there were trips.
M8, I didn't object at all when you took everything magical in Killy's hoard, or when you took Ruth's +5 bracers for yourself, because I knew right off the bat that you'd want them and that they'd be useful to your character; I didn't even make a claim for anything since then, because I didn't want to cause drama by taking things she didn't need out of the loot. This time, I
want something though.
All of Tracy's mental stats are pretty low as is.>>46328
I was mistaken.>>46329
They're probably standard Mummylord loot.
Give Torc that cloak, so he doesn't die on us again.>>46332
I say take it all back to the tower and ask Lenos. Then we can ask Kang Doot about the temple (we still don't know what it is or where it came from).
I ain't taking it yet.
For all I know it could kill me...
Ah, good point...muh stat-boost though.. T^T
Permanent Ability drain is worse than death, although Infernius could cast Restoration.
I'm actually not suprised he deleted it
You took the orb from the Lichs, and ought to have taken the extra +4 bracers
You can enhance her wisdom just by taking the Periphat>I want something
And you want shadow armor and you want paladins mount armor and you want insnaty potions and you want pet t-rexes and you want talking attack rocs and you want random pieces of corpses and you want clothes and you want mummy rot and you want chests and you received God knows how many other things
A tome takes 48 hours to read across 6 days. But your character is perpetually busy crafting and feeding birds and feat training. Just use Enchantments>Give Torcuil the cloak of resistance
Maybe not a bad idea>>46335
I just want it of it is strength or charisma, maybe constitution or wisdom
He may take it after he knows what it does though.>>46341>not giving the guy who relys on charisma the charisma bonus
Well okay then
It's not Str, but it might be Char. Only Artifacts grant Str>>46342
Why did you switch to Sorceror instead of Wizard? Wizard does moar stuff and geats moar spells, and you already get to cast whatever you want with memes without arcane prep.
We've never applied the rules to your character for spells, never.
Charisma is the key attribute for a paladin because it boosts saving throws, helps with lay of hands and smite evil, but most importantly I need a high score for several epic feats later. And I'm very far from that high score
You were wizard for like 4 months. That reallies on Int, which you have 2 points more of than charisma and you won't need to fight me for it. You can fight Tracy's faggot instead>>46343
There's a tome for strength I think I think
Wizards need components though. I don't want to have to rule-keep on that shit unless its pricey swag that counts as treasure later.>>46344
Yes, there's a tome for every stat. Gainful Exercise
GM switched me, not me. Cause sorcerers pull their spell out their ass. Wizards menorize then forget when they use it
I fucked up my grammar so bad
Can we just not rule cuck you then on charisma if you want to be a sorcerer?>>46343
If it's wisdom, let Trumpaladin read the tome and give the Periphat to Tracy, so Tracy gets +4 wisdom and 13 wisdom overall but still has time to feed her birds and train for feats
The reason is:
Wizards have to prepare their spells daily, which at the very least requires an hour for 1 spell or 8 hours for all of them. Further, they have to maintain the capacity to keep all their components on hand or within easy reach but without
them coming into contact (oh hey, wasn't there a robe that did that?).>>46348
Oh ffs it is
wisdom, +3. I got that off a natural roll on Thez' dice, back before the pyramid showed up.
>>46348>let Trump read it
Or Torc. He does get +20 on decipher checks
That's useful information>>46350
It's wisdom though, which is good for Tracy or Trumpaladin, but not of use to Torcuil
Well I didn't that before my post>>46349>throwing shade about the robe
Really? You gonna still do that?
I should clarify I meant Torc could read it to Tracy
>>46353>>46349>This was the purpose of the robe>>46354
If you're just going to be a dick to me for the purpose of being a dick, then I can do the same to you
Thats not what I meant, I'm just saying Torc has a better chance at deciphering it.
But by all means, go ahead
Tracy's neck slot is full (spiked collar with the Ring of Animal Friendship). She couldn't use the Periapt.
Where did the Periapt even come from anyway?
I assumes he means a Periapt of Wisdom.
And I'm an idiot and can't spell for shit even when the word is right in front of me,...
The Periapt was an item requested during the lead up to the mission to take back infernius
Is a ring of animal friendship really more useful than +4 wisdom? You can switch them out anyways.
She needs an engagement gift>>46361
That word is unspellable
The Periapt can be modified to attach to Tracy's collar.
Tell you what GM. Trumpaladin will cede the Tome to Tracy's Faggot, but lay tentative claim to the Robe with option to give to Infernius (maybe Torcuil?) after finding out what it is.
That way, Tracy's faggot can gain +3 wisdom, but lose out on +4 wisdom and an entire week that could have been dedicated to item crafting, animal rearing, or feat training, and Trumpaladin can keep the +4 Periapt
GM, Can I get a list of everything thats currently unclaimed?
>>46362>Is a ring of animal friendship really more useful
I thought it'd be the item most similar to her iconic /mlp/-collar, because Friendship is Magick.
Also, why do you want to increase his Wis so much? None of his spells have notable saving throws, and he's already got enough Wis to cast all of his spells. He can cast Owl's Wisdom when he needs a boost anyway.>>46365
Those goats would make ebin mounts, fyi.
Why goats though?
Could make a nice meal for Snek though
Then again, they're very limited in use.
You're gonna love the Goats. But so will Infernius and Tracy's faggot>>46366
The original reason I wanted it was specifically to give to Tracy. But I later realized that Paladins have damn near no spells. A level 17 paladin can only cast one level 4 spell a day. But a level 17 paladin can cast two level 4 spells a day. I hate having to debate with myself whether it's worth it to cast death ward now or keep until later, or chose between death ward and holy sword, and there really is no good reason Tracy should have had to roll a saving throw on a finger of death in the charge against RBG. Wisdom also helps with Sense Motive, which is one of the skills I actually use, although not by a massive margin
They're almost definitely Figurines of wonderous power:>The Goat of Traveling: This statuette provides a speedy and enduring mount equal to that of a heavy horse in every way except appearance. The goat can travel for a maximum of one day each week—continuously or in any combination of periods totaling 24 hours. At this point, or when the command word is uttered, it returns to its statuette form for not less than one day before it can again be used.>The Goat of Travail: This statuette becomes an enormous creature, larger than a bull, with the statistics of a nightmare except for the addition of a pair of wicked horns of exceptional size (damage 1d8+4 for each horn). If it is charging to attack, it may only use its horns (but add 6 points of damage to each successful attack in that round). It can be called to life just once per month for up to 12 hours at a time.>The Goat of Terror: When called upon with the proper command word, this statuette becomes a destrier-like mount, with the statistics of a light warhorse. However, its rider can employ the goat’s horns as weapons (one horn as a +3 heavy lance, the other as a +5 longsword). When ridden in an attack against an opponent, the goat of terror radiates fear as the spell in a 30-foot radius (Will DC 16 partial). It can be used once every two weeks for up to 3 hours per use.
Nice pali. Its a party decision, not a GM one.>>46365
No, cuz 1. I'm not sure who has/gets what since the party gave it to NPCs to transport it. 2. I don't know who has 'claim' on whatever yet. Here IS a list of everything, including King Doot's swag.
4 Goat Figurines (I know I said three, but I forgot one)
A Rod with a Shit-Ton of Buttons
A Thickly Bound Tome
Magnificent Half Plate
True, but Infernius will love them anyways
A Nightmare is too OP to use as a general mount, and so naturally it's limited in use>>46371
No, we're keeping the cloak and the half plate in the dungeon>>46372
I just specified the coffins
I'll settle for the ring, a goat, and the scroll.
Maybe the rod...
Let's find out what the scroll and rod arm before divvying
Just the cloak and the half-plate?>>46374
Infernius made first bid on the rod, but idk
He can have as many goats as he wants if I can use that sexy rod. Tracy doesn't need a mount.
We can't use the Tome anytime soon at all, most of that shit will require lenos, and there is no way at all to carry coffins and so much gold
Fine, we take it back to the tower with armed
So you know what the rod is>rod is sexy
Tracy doesn't need a sex toy
He probably knows what it is. With an Intelligence check, Trump might realize that it bears a resemblance (though obviously different make) to the Rod that spews kittens n shit.
I do not know what the rod is
I don't like fighting over shit when I have no idea what most of it is. Let's wait until we know what we are fighting over, then we kill each other over it
So it's a monster summoning rod? Sounds like Tracy material>>46382
Very good point
I don't want anything but the rod and the tome, desu. Tracy's slots are full.
Ive already claimed the rod m8
That's a large portion of the take. The biggest portion>>46385
Fight Tracy over it
Not even close>>46385
There is unresolved contention of claims.
The rod is the only thing i want.
"Those goats are cute, but they don't have any gems on them. Yet." ^_^
The rod appears to be a lordy might rod, which gives a shit load of reasonably powerful weapons and a few other boosts>>46384
These are big items, so this will be remembered in the next set of loot. I want the next tome if charisma strength constitution or wisdom.
"Gems will be liquidated to help with the next massive building project, whenever that's coming"
I guess you did ask for it first...
I know only one rod with buttons on it, a I really
wanted that one, but okay..
Let Thez have her jewelry.
They are earth goats right? Or are they pastel colored goats?
Ill let you have my pick for the next loot we get.
Thez isn't using it as jewelry
I don't want to just conquer the planet. I want to shape
it. A highway will cost money, as will a brewery. The upcoming art gallery. A market. A stadium in Sparintenar. An entirely rebuilt Court City>>46397
There are actually very many items in the loot that might be good for Infernius
pls tell what robe, ring, and half plate armor are
*rushes back to tower and shows lenos*
"Tryyyy aaaaand stop-meeeee" she sing-songs back, smiling.
Dont forget my space aryan project.
Also this. Moonbase when?
Half-plate is probably a a +2 suit>>46402
No. I wanna see him explode.
"I dunno, but that armor is reeeeeally pretty and shiny, aesthetically speaking. The ring almost has a flame motif to it, with the gems and all and the shape of it. The robe,... I dunno." shrugs.>>46402>>46406<whoooof>>stop her
When torculi invents rocketry.
I have to defend muh waifu friend.
Just click "last 50 posts">>46410
Give Torc a couple days
So, can Torc look at the scroll?
I press the buttons on the rod.
[1d20+1 = 15]>>46409
Trumpaladin has now seen a robe of scintillating colors, a cloak of charisma, and a robe of infinite pockets. Roll for intelligence check>>46410
And I have to defend the future of the white race. That will require resources
Are you seriously thinking about saving our people?
Someone gibs a good new bread meme about parties fighting over loot while I bake.....>>46412
,,, what happens next.
Saving is not enough. I want to make them great again
Tentatively laying claim to armor
Do skeletons pop out get on the floor and walk the dinosaur?
Your right we do need to fix the jewish marxist programming.
Not as good as the one you've got though.
Infernius should wear it.>>46413
Everyone gets a cut of the loot, m8. Thez only asked for the shiny things.>>46415>pic
But putting it on goats? Sell them and use the down payment for a brewery Durpistan when we colonize it>>46419
Definitely. There is so much that can be done>>46420
I don't know what the hell the armor is. I want to know first
No, she said she was going to make them shiny. I never emphasized this entirely, but Uatchit - which was an Ebony Fly - is now a Gold and gem-studded Ebony fly of exquisite appearance. She's just gonna do that to the goats, she's not claiming them.
"Shut up and bake faggot!"
>>46421>I want to know first
You'd probably have to go back and ask Lenos then.
I'd be just fine if we all waited until the next set of loot to start fighting over the combined horde, but if we need to fight over it now
I want to know what we are fighting over