What it is? Its an ongoing thread-based fantasy RPG
What it do? Players do their thing based off dice scripts and 3.5e D&D as a rules baseline.
Throughout the week we shitpost at one another and on weekends we kill shit or surmount some form of obstacle. New players always welcome.
The party currently has a trebuchet, a series of cannons, and an airship with another series of cannons aimed at a floating black pyramid just out from the docks of Port Barry. Its not actually a pyramid, its an octahedron, but its half submerged. Some quick thinking from the resident Mage kept it from teleporting away and escaping, and now the party is looking to crack that bitch open and see what sorta toys are inside. And kill shit.
1398 replies and 124 files omitted.
>>45099Kek
So, how does that barrage affect the tower?
[1d100 = 18]Alright. Sorry Infernius can't make it, we'll just say he pulled something while sex.
>>45103Well, here's the thing. That second shot was a 1, and the dice roll is to determine "how bad".
[6d6+10 = 34]>>45104Okay, not so bad. The shell failed to fire properly. Only half of the shots hit the target though.
As the smoke from the initial fire dissipates, the flanking engines begin their initial assault. The Pyramid shows cracks and deformation along the barrage point, but appears to be holding together. Thez <whoooof> appears on the ship, alerted to the activity by the obvious cannon-fire.
>>45102Because you keep ACTIVELY TRYING TO FUCK THINGS UP
Stahp
"Well that was disappointing. Can we shoot it again?" Thez asks.
>>45106"Hey Thez! Would you mind opperating the cannons for a moment?"
Torc casts meteor swarm at the pyramid
>>45110Just keep firing, m8. Don't use-up your spells.
>>45110"Uhm,... okay,.... What do I do?"
>>45110Meteor swarm - while a brutally effective spell on hoomans and other things, is not terribly effective against buildings. In fact, it is totally uneffective.
So, while 4 large glowing spheres streak off and collide with the pyramid, resulting in a huge fiery blast,... it appears to have had no effect.
>>45112Scaring off the level 7 cleric celestisl
during the undead invasion and not waiting a day to do it later. Setting the supply of wood on fire.
[14d20 = 164]>>45114That's what I was waiting for. Keep in mind, I did not plan this
>>45115>no effectNo effect? It means that the structure is being bombarded by spheres from 4 different angles now, only one of which actually will cause a breach. And how will they know which one, or that any of them caused a breach, until we are already upon them
>>45116That didn't cause any problems. She only left after the battle was over.
>Setting the supply of wood on fire.Even if it hadn't been damp, a whole forest doesn't burn that easily. Wood supply was never threatened.
>>45118I think only the ships canons are able to damage it,. The trebuchets aren't doing anything.
Okay. As the second volley fires, a number of things occur. First and most obvious, is remember that canon that misfired? BOOOM.
Secondly, especially with that 20 there, the second volley successfully rends a hole in the side of the pyramid.
I'm assuming that the assembled siege engines continue their fire, with archers taking position to cover the entrance.
Except on board the airship. The explosion of the second cannon knocks the airship from its position, and the cannons are now pointing the wrong way
>>45119The battle is going on
right nowYou intended it to burn the entire forest down, and you said so repeatedly. You were disappointed that it did not have that effect
>>45121"AH FUCK"
Torc jumps up and fights for control of the ship
>>45121>cannons are the wrong directionEh, that's okay for the moment
>>45122>The battle is going on right nowWe'll survive.
>You intended it to burn the entire forest down>entireWrong.
She was only desecrating part of it. Merely making a mess.
>you were disappointed that it did not have that effectNo, I was bummed that Troll didn't show up.
And it doesn't take long for a response either. Almost immediately, a series of blood-curdling shrieks can be heard emanating from the hole, and a sizeable group of creatures starts to issue from the hole. Some are weird reddish heads that have creepy bat wings and tentacles hanging from them, while others are shadowy forms that don't appear to have any discernable features other than being vaguely humanoid in shape. Both are airborn.
[1d20+4 = 12]>>45126Fire a Screaming Bolt into the Cluster.
>>45123Want to fireball these things?
>>45126Order Slovenia to fire the trebuchet at the mass
[1d20+21 = 34]>>45128Well, that didn't hit anything, but it should spook them.
Tracy charges on Trump's command.
She lets out a fearsome roar (intimidate chech; demoralize), and looses her chain, ready to attack with it.
>>45129>>45130They're not shooting while we're charging, are they?
>>45126Fug, Torc casts Polar ray at the swarm.
Ranged Touch Attack:
[1d20 = 9]Damage:
[17d6 = 63]Ice ice baby >>45125>>45131The archers are specifically trained to shoot enemies who are danger close to allies. The trebuchet... Well, hopefully it fires at the mass before we approach or it targets a different area
>>45127>>45128>>45129>>45131Okay first off, these are undead. They don't fear anything except holy shit. Nice try.
The Generals score several hits, but the distance slows many of the shots down enough that they are avoided.
What kind of munition is the Trebuchet firing? Is it stone or is it pitch (or something else?)
>>45132Targeting a head or a shade?
Also, roll for initiative
[1d20 = 20][1d20 = 11]>>45134The Generals have the far shot feat for range increments of 165 feet, they are firing from up high for a +1, master work bow makes +1 and weapon focus adds plus 1. I would assume the trebuchet would fire a number of stones like grape shot
Also rolling for Fae's initiative
>>45137Do we apply are weapon modifiers to our rolls?
[1d20+2 = 16]>>45136Frozen, falls into the water with a splash.
>>45137Well Trump goes first obviously
>>45140No, only initiative modifiers (Improved Initiative feat, etc.).
>>45140Well, when you are using a weapon.
>>45138Kek, but why do you get a bonus?
>>45141That works.
How pissed would you all be if you couldn't see these things, but they took some decent damge for 17 rounds?
>>45143This form has Improved Initiative.
[2d20 = 28]Okay, so amongst the party I'm seeing:
Trump
Thez
>>45138 +6?
Either Tracy or Fae, cuz I need sauce on that +6
The other one of Fae or Tracy
Torcuil
Rolling for heads and tails
[1d20 = 1]>>45146Both FAE and Tracy have +6 modifiers. I didn't add that to Fae's roll, so Fae is above Tracy. Also, roll for Generals
>>45148Aww
Well, Trumpaladin casts Bulls strength on self and Mount (Tracy)
I really need to know if you guys would kill me for obscuring the hellish demon things
>>45147For simplicity's sake. I could tell you exactly what they are, but that ruins the effect.
>>45149I see the improved initiative, but that's only a +1