Its that RP thread again! Spectators can shitpost, new players can try it out with little/no investment, and established players need no explanation.
We return as most of the party is either in Sparintenar preparing for a swank banquet - a custom among the Spartans - or speeding towards; except Thez. ;_;
Our newest player Stix is exploring the surrounding forest area, as is his proclivity as a ranger.
Tracy, speeds toward Sparintenar at full speed for some reason unknown to GM at time of OP.
Thez is at the Sticky Wickett, having brought Bones along to have a mostly one-sided conversation, accented occasionally by >doot
Game is temporally not set to fire off at a particular point, but last thread passed 2nd bump so,....
/vx/ - Videogames and Paranormal
1414 replies and 97 files omitted.
So Stix has the upper hand in escaping the scene. The gibbers are fast, but not as fast as a pony in flight, and before long the sounds of gibbering fades into the surroundings. Stix is currently about 1/2 the distance from Port Barry, on the verge of a path leading to a small village that sits in between several larger cities (incl Port Barry).
The tree from which he fled is actually a particular spot at a crossroads (no actual roads, but theres several places beyond) which the party at large have been to and fro from, and which may turn up again.
>>56320
I don't think the other side of the mountain was ever explored before.
Tracy checks out the landscape.
I don't think the other side of the mountain was ever explored before.
Tracy checks out the landscape.
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Trumpaladin tells the tales of the Denver Broncos for whoever shall gather and listen
"Everypony knows that the Denver Broncos are Football. But what many people don't know is that they are also Baseball, Basketball, Volleyball, and Frisbee Golf, in the sense that all of those sports were kicked repeatedly in the groin by John Fucking Nigger Punching Elway, until the converted and became Football"
"Everypony knows that the Denver Broncos are Football. But what many people don't know is that they are also Baseball, Basketball, Volleyball, and Frisbee Golf, in the sense that all of those sports were kicked repeatedly in the groin by John Fucking Nigger Punching Elway, until the converted and became Football"
File (): 0ABEF640EDAF7DC229E6A348D40EEA03-1445174.png (1.4 MB, 1200x1200, 1519523051098.png)
"For many people, the Denver Broncos are a source of comfort and inspiration. However, it is important to remember that the Denver Broncos have pure electricity in their pantaloons. If you don't know you'd probably best ask somebody, because John Elway will kick you right in the dick if you're not watching."
He elaborates:
"I've seen it happen, you know. One time, thousands of years ago, when the earth was void and without form, he who Shall Not Be Named was doing non-Football type stuff for the Oakland Raiders, which may or may not have involved licking a frog's hairy dilapidated butthole, when all of a sudden, who should appear but the Almighty One, his Majesty John Elway."
He elaborates:
"I've seen it happen, you know. One time, thousands of years ago, when the earth was void and without form, he who Shall Not Be Named was doing non-Football type stuff for the Oakland Raiders, which may or may not have involved licking a frog's hairy dilapidated butthole, when all of a sudden, who should appear but the Almighty One, his Majesty John Elway."
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>>56336
I see that that was rather unexpected. You know what else is unexpected? The Spanish Inquisition, because the spanish inquisition are John Elway's agents on Earth and on Equestria and in Portland Oregon, and they are always ready to pop out of your bag of doritos, that crack between the seat cushions, and smaller Volkswagon vehicles and kick your non-football worshiping ass
I see that that was rather unexpected. You know what else is unexpected? The Spanish Inquisition, because the spanish inquisition are John Elway's agents on Earth and on Equestria and in Portland Oregon, and they are always ready to pop out of your bag of doritos, that crack between the seat cushions, and smaller Volkswagon vehicles and kick your non-football worshiping ass
>>56334
"I really wouldn't be the person to ask about such things. Aside from my position as administrator, I'm little more than a figurehead. If there were any irregulars in the city, they would not flock to me."
>>56336
The Rock(?) bites ahold of Tracy's leg. It does not
do damage, but it has a hold.
>>56333
By those digits, is there also Badminton?
"I really wouldn't be the person to ask about such things. Aside from my position as administrator, I'm little more than a figurehead. If there were any irregulars in the city, they would not flock to me."
>>56336
The Rock(?) bites ahold of Tracy's leg. It does not
do damage, but it has a hold.
>>56333
By those digits, is there also Badminton?
>>56336
But unlike rocks that suddenly say "fuck you" and attack, and unlike the Spanish Inquisition, do you know what you should always expect? The Denver Broncos. And expect John Elway to be Awesome, because he is the Denver broncos, and he did banish the Oakland Raiders to Isreal where they did displace the Jews in the Babylonian Captivity. And he did play cards with Peytown manning, and after winning the game, created the Universe and the first Football. And he did Cum inside Rainbow Dash from the 30 yardline at Mile High Stadium. Praise American
But unlike rocks that suddenly say "fuck you" and attack, and unlike the Spanish Inquisition, do you know what you should always expect? The Denver Broncos. And expect John Elway to be Awesome, because he is the Denver broncos, and he did banish the Oakland Raiders to Isreal where they did displace the Jews in the Babylonian Captivity. And he did play cards with Peytown manning, and after winning the game, created the Universe and the first Football. And he did Cum inside Rainbow Dash from the 30 yardline at Mile High Stadium. Praise American
File (): 9C5382E8EE9216C205B9D457DE3711F8-65880.jpg (64.3 KB, 400x400, 1519523139374.jpg)
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[1d20+24 = 39]
>>56339
"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Tracy neighs loudly at the rock-thing in an attempt to get it to let go as she pulls out her cane.
Intimidate check (idk how big it it, so aplly size modifier pls)
>>56339
"REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
Tracy neighs loudly at the rock-thing in an attempt to get it to let go as she pulls out her cane.
Intimidate check (idk how big it it, so aplly size modifier pls)
>>56343
Kek
I didn't plan it, but as Tracy kicked the rock a guy in my head said "Ooooh! That rock should be a mimic". I rolled a dice, the dice agreed, so that rock is a mimic.
Kek
I didn't plan it, but as Tracy kicked the rock a guy in my head said "Ooooh! That rock should be a mimic". I rolled a dice, the dice agreed, so that rock is a mimic.
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>>56345
Do you know who is a complete badass at intimidating rocks? John Elway. That's right, when vacationing in Aruba, John Elway was showing some local heathens the superiority of Football when a Rock tried to rob them. Little did it know it was attacking John Motherfucking Elway. Elway kicked the in the nuts so hard it became a football, went back in time and beat Jesse Owens in the 100 meter dash in the 1936 olympics. Rocks don't even have nuts, so that's pretty impressive
Do you know who is a complete badass at intimidating rocks? John Elway. That's right, when vacationing in Aruba, John Elway was showing some local heathens the superiority of Football when a Rock tried to rob them. Little did it know it was attacking John Motherfucking Elway. Elway kicked the in the nuts so hard it became a football, went back in time and beat Jesse Owens in the 100 meter dash in the 1936 olympics. Rocks don't even have nuts, so that's pretty impressive
>>56339
The Deity hath responded with the following:
"Badminton is usually referred to by those in the know as the Colorado Rockies of Badminton. When the earth was only ten thousand years old by the reckoning of the moon, Jews came out of its foul depths and created the Anti-Football, which shall henceforth be known as the Oakland Raiders. One of them had a growth upon their neck, that swelled to the size of a basketball, and hence became basketball. It was at that point that a lizard sprang forth, recited the Fifth Incantation, and emerged victorious from the anus of Basketball. This creature was badminton."
The Deity hath responded with the following:
"Badminton is usually referred to by those in the know as the Colorado Rockies of Badminton. When the earth was only ten thousand years old by the reckoning of the moon, Jews came out of its foul depths and created the Anti-Football, which shall henceforth be known as the Oakland Raiders. One of them had a growth upon their neck, that swelled to the size of a basketball, and hence became basketball. It was at that point that a lizard sprang forth, recited the Fifth Incantation, and emerged victorious from the anus of Basketball. This creature was badminton."
On a whim, I am contemplating an AMA-format, where rather than giving vague or enigmatic answers or suggestions, I give direct answers and responses. Anyone interested?
BTW Stix, the Gibbers are really only there for me to irritate players with. There's not much Exp to them, they're like roaches (there's no getting rid of them) and they're a damn nuisance. The dice allowed him to escape, but they can be nasty. Exploration of already-explored areas will result in that sort of thing. Generally in order to explore an area will involve a quest or something that I'll work up, but in the aftermath there's really not much to say for it. Interestingly enough, beyond the tree that Stix found is Trollestia's grove, which I think may have been mentioned, but perhaps another time.
BTW Stix, the Gibbers are really only there for me to irritate players with. There's not much Exp to them, they're like roaches (there's no getting rid of them) and they're a damn nuisance. The dice allowed him to escape, but they can be nasty. Exploration of already-explored areas will result in that sort of thing. Generally in order to explore an area will involve a quest or something that I'll work up, but in the aftermath there's really not much to say for it. Interestingly enough, beyond the tree that Stix found is Trollestia's grove, which I think may have been mentioned, but perhaps another time.
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>>56347
That's neat, but do you know the story of where medicine ball comes from?
In 1836, while attending the international conference on oppressing non-whites and women in Geneva Switzerland, John Elway was demonstrating the pure superiority of the Football. But a Jewish Merchant by the Name of Happy Goldstien was in attendance as well, and he attempted to subvert the meeting by showing his invention: Soccer, which would subject all Whites to slavery and subvert their nations. But John Elway wasn't having any of that shit, so he shoved the soccer ball far up Happy Goldstein's ass. 8 days' later, Happy Goldstien died of constipation, but the Soccer ball became a medicine ball while in the depths of Happy's ass. That medicine ball was given as a gift to Tsar Alexander I, and is currently on display in the Hermitage Museum in Saint Petersburg
That's neat, but do you know the story of where medicine ball comes from?
In 1836, while attending the international conference on oppressing non-whites and women in Geneva Switzerland, John Elway was demonstrating the pure superiority of the Football. But a Jewish Merchant by the Name of Happy Goldstien was in attendance as well, and he attempted to subvert the meeting by showing his invention: Soccer, which would subject all Whites to slavery and subvert their nations. But John Elway wasn't having any of that shit, so he shoved the soccer ball far up Happy Goldstein's ass. 8 days' later, Happy Goldstien died of constipation, but the Soccer ball became a medicine ball while in the depths of Happy's ass. That medicine ball was given as a gift to Tsar Alexander I, and is currently on display in the Hermitage Museum in Saint Petersburg
>>56353
>beyond is the grove
Again, good information, it just wasnt all that clear. I will try again sometime
>AMA
Sounds good, though I won’t know what all to ask
>beyond is the grove
Again, good information, it just wasnt all that clear. I will try again sometime
>AMA
Sounds good, though I won’t know what all to ask
>>56355
And John Elway did make love to Queen victoria thereafter, and that is how the current line of British Royalty came to be
And John Elway did make love to Queen victoria thereafter, and that is how the current line of British Royalty came to be
>>56361
Tracy grabs ahold of the Rock, but is unable to pry it loose. She's currently grabbing the rock, which is still biting her hoof, painlessly.
Tracy grabs ahold of the Rock, but is unable to pry it loose. She's currently grabbing the rock, which is still biting her hoof, painlessly.
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Trumpaladin continues his preaching of the Glory of the Denver Broncos:
"Some people think that potatoes are too starchy for the Denver Broncos, but not me, no siree bob. When I was just a small potato, I would occasionally salt myself and become that entity known to The French as Le Pomme de Terre, and I would cause the cholesterol of my enemies to rise through the buttery menace of my potato hide."
"Some people think that potatoes are too starchy for the Denver Broncos, but not me, no siree bob. When I was just a small potato, I would occasionally salt myself and become that entity known to The French as Le Pomme de Terre, and I would cause the cholesterol of my enemies to rise through the buttery menace of my potato hide."
>>56362
Front or back hoof?
Tracy stares curiously at the "rock" that has managed to instantly cure her murderous boredom.
"...Now where did you come from?" she ponders looking at the tenacious little object.
Front or back hoof?
Tracy stares curiously at the "rock" that has managed to instantly cure her murderous boredom.
"...Now where did you come from?" she ponders looking at the tenacious little object.
>>56365
Front, I assume. Whichever hoof was going to kick it down the mountain. There don't appear to be any more carnivorous rocks around, but this one looked perfectly harmless before it bit.
Front, I assume. Whichever hoof was going to kick it down the mountain. There don't appear to be any more carnivorous rocks around, but this one looked perfectly harmless before it bit.
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>>56362
Do you know who is a damned master at grabbing things? Trump fucking Sentry. And he's a master at grabbing horse pussy, with over 200 confirmed pussy grabs. This one time, he encountered Rainbow Dash, and she tried to runaway from him. But he shot her a charming glance so sharp she did fall down prone to him right there. And as he went to grab her pussy his hand met with that of our lord and savior John Elway. And as they held their hands together over the glorious, sacred, and very wet pussy of Rainbow Dash, that is when Trump Sentry did know that Elway was the god for him
Do you know who is a damned master at grabbing things? Trump fucking Sentry. And he's a master at grabbing horse pussy, with over 200 confirmed pussy grabs. This one time, he encountered Rainbow Dash, and she tried to runaway from him. But he shot her a charming glance so sharp she did fall down prone to him right there. And as he went to grab her pussy his hand met with that of our lord and savior John Elway. And as they held their hands together over the glorious, sacred, and very wet pussy of Rainbow Dash, that is when Trump Sentry did know that Elway was the god for him
>>56366
Tracy raises her hoof and stares at the little "rock" latched to her hoof, and chuckles, finding the strange little being to be rather cute in its endeavor to eat her hoof.
Tracy raises her hoof and stares at the little "rock" latched to her hoof, and chuckles, finding the strange little being to be rather cute in its endeavor to eat her hoof.
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To Renquist, to the attendees, and to whomever may listen and not have their ears burnt out by the unadultered Truth, Trumpaladin relates:
"It was in the early afternoon of that Tuesday that I did take my vorpal sword and plunge it deep into the kidneys of several of my enemies, for they are of great enmity to me, and I am sworn of enmity to them. That is why, on the morning of Bastille Day every third year, I make a pilgrimage to the Holy City of Denver, at which point I stab the nearest potato farmer I come across with a fondue fork."
"It was in the early afternoon of that Tuesday that I did take my vorpal sword and plunge it deep into the kidneys of several of my enemies, for they are of great enmity to me, and I am sworn of enmity to them. That is why, on the morning of Bastille Day every third year, I make a pilgrimage to the Holy City of Denver, at which point I stab the nearest potato farmer I come across with a fondue fork."
>>56368
Tracy, not minding the creature one bit, stands up on her hind legs and continues walking down the mountain trail, bringing the hoof-eating pebble with her.
Tracy, not minding the creature one bit, stands up on her hind legs and continues walking down the mountain trail, bringing the hoof-eating pebble with her.
>>56370
"I remember when I was intoxicated one Bastille day. After completing my pilgrimage to Denver I travelled with a band of Rice farmers, who are a hell of a lot nicer than Potato farmers, and who let me taste glorious sake as we flew over to Europe. I ended up drunk driving a truck down the streets of Marseilles, but let's not talk about that. Ever."
"I remember when I was intoxicated one Bastille day. After completing my pilgrimage to Denver I travelled with a band of Rice farmers, who are a hell of a lot nicer than Potato farmers, and who let me taste glorious sake as we flew over to Europe. I ended up drunk driving a truck down the streets of Marseilles, but let's not talk about that. Ever."
>>56370
Do you know what the best intoxicant is? It's not alcohol, nor meth, nor marijuana or even horse pussy. No, it's the Denver broncos. Do you know how high you can get with them? Mile High, that's how like, like you're sipping the sweet then air of the holy city of Denver as you kneel prostrate before John Elway himself, who tells you his old glorious war stories, sort of like your grandfather exceot his stories arem't boring but awesome, as you vision starts to display glorious fields of multicolored ponies sort of like LSD except when you touch them, you touch actual horse pussy and not just your neighbor's cat which is frightened out of its wits and scrathes at you and then you have to explain to your coworkers later why you have those scrathes on your face and the best you can say is that you somehow got them while trying to lick the pussy. No, you will be carries along on mother fucking clouds like meth, except you get to keep your teeth and the clouds have pegasi on them, which are also sexy
Do you know what the best intoxicant is? It's not alcohol, nor meth, nor marijuana or even horse pussy. No, it's the Denver broncos. Do you know how high you can get with them? Mile High, that's how like, like you're sipping the sweet then air of the holy city of Denver as you kneel prostrate before John Elway himself, who tells you his old glorious war stories, sort of like your grandfather exceot his stories arem't boring but awesome, as you vision starts to display glorious fields of multicolored ponies sort of like LSD except when you touch them, you touch actual horse pussy and not just your neighbor's cat which is frightened out of its wits and scrathes at you and then you have to explain to your coworkers later why you have those scrathes on your face and the best you can say is that you somehow got them while trying to lick the pussy. No, you will be carries along on mother fucking clouds like meth, except you get to keep your teeth and the clouds have pegasi on them, which are also sexy
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