ITT Roleplaying
Classic Tabletop D&D (3.5e mostly)
New players welcome, most especially our recent pony addition
Its always some level of nuts in this thread, and this moment does not disappoint.
All kinds of things have happened, the result of which is that with over a week passing in meat-space the party is still right where they left off at.
Tracy is venturing to the mountains with her floofy-faced, hutungous birbs in an oversided wagon, hoping to give them a chance to have a moment with their biological father.
Trump, for some reason, is quite butt-hurt by this. What? Its true,....
Thez is enjoying the first decent night's sleep in over a week, Infernius contemplates (((genocide))) (does it work in that context? I mean he's contemplating their genocide of course), and Torcuil learns that Death is a pretty cool chick with a morbid sense of humor in an absurd job that you wouldn't think is a job, but its literally a job. So yeah, next time he wants to hit her up, just blow ur brains out or something.
Last thread got to over 1800 posts <trumpet fanfare> but that shit is impossible on mobile and cumbersome at best otherwise so,....
1452 replies and 187 files omitted.
>>54390Alright, what hath the Spartan Auxiliaries to say in approach to the city?
>>54390She relaxes and eats her lunch of ambiguous meat-stuffs, and sends shabby off with a bag of onions in his hand, unless he'd rather sit and eat with her.
>>54390Shrugs at the sight of tiny footprints
“Might as well follow this a bit.”
Keeps a look out for animals that may have caused this trail.
>>54393Before we continue, how experienced of a ranger is Stix? He has a dagger as I recall, any other weapons? We're getting to the part where that will be determined for certain.
>>54392Are you trolling me?
>>54394Well, I kind of just like the image of Tracy sitting back and eating lunch with an ogre. Same reason I had her revive the Fire Giants.
>>54394He also has a bow, but as you can imagine, it is not the easiest weapon for an earth pony to use. He mainly focuses on stealth to avoid direct encounters until a trap is set for his enemy.
>>54394Tracy gave him a double-ended bane shortsword when they met. It's for animals and magical beasts.
>>54396But I’m unfamiliar with D&D mechanics, do not sure how to describe the experience. He has been in the woods a lot, but never fought more than some tough magical creatures before.
>>54397Oh right, forgot about that.
>>54395>Fire GiantsI forgot about those. Ogres act differently under these circumstances than Fire Giants. The ogre snarls and grabs the end of the bag like an exceptionally crude flail.
>>54397wut?
>>54396K, I'm thinking 6th level then
>>54398As a Ranger, you can choose a combat style. You can choose better range combat, or specialized two-weapon fighting.
The double-weapon can count as two weapons on either end, so he could use it while we figure out what his preferred combat style is.
>inb4 Tracy is beaten with a sack of onions
>>54400She did back at the stables.
She made it in case daddybird needed a little extra "convincing", and the other end was in case she ever saw troll again.
>>54401Okay, seriously. Why did you not continue the investigation?
>>54405Mostly, because I thought that Tracy wouldn't really care what happened to some guy named Eric if nobody missed him. She mostly just went because she felt like seeing Slovenia.
[1d20 = 13]>>54405Because there were no leads, just contacts and interactions.
>>54404Ogre has a bag of layers. Roll for initiative.
"No Snek, you can't move your rook there. It's my turn anyway"
>>54402That's a beautiful mental image
>>54404Parfaits have layers, everybody likes parfaits.
>>54409>fumble on initiativeI'm not sure how to respond to that
>>54410It was at this moment Tracy knew,
she fucked up
>>54413Not any that a mare like Tracy would bother pursuing.
Fucking around with ogres and whatnot is more interesting to her.
>>54415Great. Just have her communicate everything to someone who
would bother pursuing
[1d20 = 18]>>54413??
>>54412I kinda want to give shabby an automatic hit for that. Let's see.
Oh, Tracy takes a bag of onions to the face. >_<
>>54420Layers upon layers of pain
>>54418[layered pony noises]
Tracy makes an "Ooof!" noise as the bag of layers smacks her where it hurts.
[1d20 = 16]
And Tracy is whonked for a total of 18 layers of damage in the face. Alright, first round, the ogre is doing a full round attack with the layers, so 3 attacks. Just kidding, its only one attack.
>>54423Is it bad I'm still chuckling at my own stupid joke?
I'm pretty sure Tracy's AC is 21 or more, so I think that was a miss.
>>54426No, it's hilarious
>>54427Tracy narrowly avoids the bag of layers and readies herself Dodge Shabby.
She draws a dagger from her quiver
Rolling to sunder bag of high-quality, organic, locally-grown layers.
She can't use that stance yet, can she? And so it came to pass we wuz Mormons n sheeit that Tracy was beaten upside the face with a bag full of layers. And the dice saw that it was good.
>>54429That lands. The bag tears open, spilling layers all over the ground. The ogre looks at the shrivelled bag and creams in rage.
>>54428Nah, at least you don't watch Behind the Meme
>>54432>creamsI don't think that's what you meant
>>54432Tracy shrugs at the sound.
"You shouldn't be playing with your food, big guy."
[1d20 = 13]>>54434kek, no
>>54435He's swinging an oversized fist
... and misses. Tracy still has dagger in hand, and its her move.
>>54437Cut up his precious onions.
His relations through layers will make him cry even more
>>54436Tracy flips on her Eyes of Doom on and uses their effect to casts Doom (DC 11) and she herself casts Cause Fear, on the ogre who is seemingly ignorant of the nutritious qualities of onions.
>>54438*cuts an onion*
>Still can't get over all the missed opportunities earlier