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nuts3.jpg
Show Nuts #54
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.58626
58627 58644 59336
RP/Shitposting thread - D&D 3.5 base rules, subject to interpretation, review, and elaboration. Open for all to spectate, bantz, shitpost, or full-on play.

We begin this thread in anticipation of the weekend, where most of the party is gradually infiltrating the grand city of Cardishore. With disguises varying from an Emu, Barney the dinosaur, and a mexican clown,... as well as Fae who is entirely without costume, Trump, Tracy, and Infernius try to get a handle on whatever the hell is going on in Cardishore now or in general.
Meanwhile, Torcuil is working to get that damn cannon fixed on the Stray Cat. Meanwhile Stix returns (to the tower?) with not many answers, an over-sized acorn, and definitely no other surprises.

Meanwhile Thez,... poor forgotten and alone Thez who is babysitting the port so that none of the party's enemies see their departure and think "Wah ha ha ha! With them gone I will destroy their precious city!" I mean she gets it,... but still.
>sad dwelf noises
1511 replies and 113 files omitted.
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59254
>>59252
>>59251
Kek
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59255
>>59253
>"We'll hide in a house"
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59256
59257 59258
f55T6s6.jpg
>>59253
Wish I could make an item that did the same with Bluff too. Then she'd be set.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59257
59258 59259
>>59250
My money is on Snek desu
>>59256
U mean like a mask? "Smirk"
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59258
59260
>>59257
Same
>>59256
I love my +25 bluff bonus
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59259
>>59257
I meant like her Dust of Illusion, only for bluff, but yes. It'd be great to upgrade her Mustache-and-glasses.
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59260
59261 59264
>>59258
Too bad sorcerers don't get Glibness
>"Sir! Your gold is cursed! You need to give it to us so that it won't kill you."
>Rolls 1d20+54
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59261
59263
>>59260
That fucking settles it
BARD LEVELS HERE I COME
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59262
Um.... Trumpaladin goes through the wall
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59263
59265
>>59261
At least get to 9th level spellcasting first.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59264
59266
>>59260
>tfw game mechanics have NPCs as complete knobs
"Oi, I've got this small square peg that fits loosely in this big round hole, but I don't know what to do with this big round peg. Also, there's a small square hole I can plug with my finger"
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59265
59267
>tfw Torc has mystic Theurge but still can't cast divine spells
>>59263
But y
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59266
59270
>>59264
Kek
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59267
59268
>>59265
That's literally why he got Theurge, so he can cast divine spells
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59268
59271
>>59267
H
O
W
?
Does this mean I can pick a domain?
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59269
59270 59331
Stix sits down and seems lost in thought.
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59270
59271 59273
>>59266
Well, GM hasn't incinerated Trump yet so I'm guessing he was able to make it through...

*immediately grabs IDs for self and Fae from whoever is standing near the hole*

>>59269
"You must kill them all"
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59271
59272 59274 59280
>>59268
No, it means he can cast divine spells. I thought we went over this a long time ago.
>>59270
I'm waiting on Infernius dammit
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59272
59283
>>59271
He's not going to be here soon
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59273
59278
>>59270
hmm...
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59274
59275
>>59271
What list tho?
Cleric, Paladin, Druid, or Ranger?
There isn't really a divine spell list
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59275
59276 59277
>>59274
The spell list. Theurges don't do "domains" or w/e, they just cast spells.
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59276
59283
>>59275
I thought they just advanced whatever Divine spellcasting class they already had?
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59277
59279 59283
>>59275
Would you mind linking me this spell list?
Because Theurges build upon character's spellcasting in both arcane and divine determined by their class, and Torc can't cast divine spells
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59278
59282
>>59273
https://www.flickr.com/photos/markwetzel/4313112250
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59279
59280 59281 59283
>>59277
Just post good memes and you'll get appropriate spells for them.
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59280
59281
>>59279
This

>>59271
waits
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59281
59284 59285
>>59280
>>59279
But I don't wanna do that
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59282
>>59278
HHHMMmmmm....
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59283
59290
>>59272
Awww
How do you know that?
Okay well I'll wrap up his situation then.
When we last left Infernius, he was being set on fire. He got some really nice dice rolls, and some really crappy ones.
>>59276
It seems you're right.
>>59277
https://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/SRD:Spells
Tracy is right, he only gets 1st level divine spells at this point. Its a pity too, cuz I misinterpreted the data (I thought that being a theurge allowed the caster to use their caster level to determine the arcane/divine spells they could cast)
>>59279
Also this


Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59284
59290
>>59281
Don't be a lazy faggot.
You only get all those spell haxx because we like memes.
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59285
59286
>>59281
T H I S
H
I
S
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59286
59288 59290
>>59285
Not to be contentious - and I will accommodate to an appropriate degree - but wasn't the meme magician thing your idea? e_e
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59287
By "your" I mean Torcuil's
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59288
59289
>>59286
It was mine, actually.
>>1217 →
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59289
>>59288
Checked
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59290
59292
>>59284
I made a fucking spell list damn it
>>59283
But there are no "1st level divine spells" that I can find, only classes that use divine spells
>>59286
I regret that idea
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59292
59293
>>59290
https://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/SRD:Cleric_Spell_List
>>59291
Autism detected
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59293
59294 59296
Turns out Torc qualifies for absolutely 0 prestige classes.
>>59292
So does this mean Torc casts as a second level cleric?
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59294
59295
>>59293
You could be a archmage, if you take any metamagic feat, or an edritch knight if you learned martial weapon profficiency.
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59295
59299
>>59294
Dragon's Disciple too.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59296
59297 59299
>>59293
Negotiably, yes. Tbh, I had thought theurge was a haxx for equal cleric spells, but I had been operating in err
Oh wait, I almost forgot I'm GM
>pouf Torcuil's Theurge level(s?) are exchanged for meme magican levels
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59297
59300
>>59296
Did you consider those Paladin of Tyranny/Slaughter spells for Tracy yet?
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59298
Basically here's the thing. I had envisioned, intended, and resolved that the skinniest-assed MF'er (Torcuil) was gonna get spell hax. Since I determined long ago that many divine spells should be arcane equally/also, and vice versa, and THEN stumbled across Theurge, I figured this was a neat and easy resolution. Unfortunately, I was wrong. So, in the same vein of TRUMP GOOD, now there's Meme Magican (sp intentional) as a class
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59299
59300
>>59296
You mean sorcerer...

Right?
>>59295
I will damned, something Torc is actually qualified for
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59300
59301 59302 59304
>>59297
Got a reference/link or am I flying blind
>>59299
I'm still trying to allow him to use cleric spells. Do you want me to not?
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59301
59303
>>59300
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/Publication:Unearthed_Arcana/Paladin_of_Tyranny_Class_Features
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/Publication:Unearthed_Arcana/Paladin_of_Slaughter_Class_Features

Basically, an inverted Paladin spell list.
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59302
59303 59310
>>59300
While we're handing out gibs can I have Divine Might for Trumpaladin? Maybe Sacred Shield? The "rebalanced paladin" includes two bonus feats including those from the Divine Champion
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59303
59319
>>59301
Oh, okay. What Blackguard should have been. Makes sense.
>>59302
Links faggot, am drunk
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59304
59305 59306
>>59300
I'd rather Torc just be a sorcerer.
I mean, I have a spell list and shit for a lvl 17 sorcerer And I wasn't really enjoying meme maging as much as I thought I would...
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59305
59307
>>59304
Okay....
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59306
59307
>>59304
Just meme a wizard to do the magic for you
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59307
59308 59309
>>59305
>tfw I'm now the party disappointment
>>59306
I...
You...
WHAT
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59308
59311
>>59307
Just meme Gandalf or someone to fight for you and do cool stuff and cast the spells you want
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59309
59311
>>59307
Not disappoint, just,... disappoint Xp
Seriously, I had hoped that giving Torc clerical spells (again, cuz lots of specific spells - Airwalk for example - should be cross-class spells) would be of benefit
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59310
>>59302
Yeah, you should've taken Divine Might a while ago..
I only never bothered with it because Tracy's Char is so low.
>Sacred Shield
What's that?
Is there a profane equivalent?
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59311
59312
>>59308
………………
I am of confusion
>>59309
I just wasn't enjoying the whole gimick, it was fun at first, but then it just kinda drug on.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59312
59313 59315
>>59311
Say what you will, but that "Oh lawd Jesus" post was one of the finest moment of game desu. Still we can re-work it if it is preferrable
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59313
59314 59315
>>59312
Uh... what bread was that?
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59314
59315
>>59313
Oh, like I know off hand, I don't even remember the context. You do realize we account for about 57k of the 59k posts on this board?
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59315
59316 59318
>>59313
>>59312
>>59314
This one? >>8492 →
Please be patient. I have autism.
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59316
>>59315
This one as well...
>>9469 →
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59317
59321
Stix feels around his cloak for his dagger and remembers it was thrown in battle with Thez.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59318
>>59315
Precisely that one
>4 digits
Were we ever so young?
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59319
59320 59324 59325
>>59303
Page 106
http://forum.nwnights.ru/uploads/rulebooks/Complete_Warrior.pdf
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59320
59322
>>59319
Can we cite SRD sourcebooks?
I've had my eye on Arterial Strike.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59321
59323
>>59317
Its still stuck in the support-beams of the port walls. Don't worry tho, mundane daggers are a dime a dozen and easily replaceable (ask Tracy Xp)
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59322
59325
>>59320
Nigger, you've already asked for gibs tonight
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59323
59324 59327
>>59321
Not to Stix. That one his sentimental to him.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59324
59326
>>59319
Oh no. Its a seriously exhaustive manual.
>RIP my spare time
>>59323
Noted. The dagger in question is unmoved, for precisely the same reason
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59325
59326
>>59322
>>59319
I want Divine Vigor, if we can take stuff from that book.
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59326
59328
>>59325
Fuck off

>>59324
Tracy's faggot insists Divine Might is SRD
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59327
59329 59331
>>59323
>Stix Dagger's are special
Tracy lost all of her weapons, including her "dark" and "edgy" knives when she handed them over to the security at Cardishore five months ago
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59328
>>59326
It is.
I noticed that feats are introduced by sourcebooks, but the feats that were considered to be balanced made it into the 3.5 SRD.

Divine Might is worth training for.
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59329
59332
>>59327
*desire to retrieve daggers intensifies*
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59330
59334 59336
It looks like Infernius's faggot won't be returning tonight, so I'll be in bed soon.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59331
59333 59343
>>59327
And who's fault was that?
>>59269
Amist all the,... contention, Thez sits relatively before Stix, sipping "gently" from a glass of clear liquid, and wondering about how to proceed.
"So,... do you,... regret,... killing,...."
Mrs. Sentry
OuvwY
?
No.59332
59337
>>59329
"Just wait for me, girls..." Tracy says under her breath
In my defense, I didn't expect to get teleported in the middle of security.
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59333
59346
>>59331
“Myself? That’s the funny thing. I remember right before I did it thinking that it must be done. Like I was doing everyone a favor by doing it. I partially wish I didnt, but I don’t know if it was avoidable.”
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59334
>>59330
Infernius entered the discord just now
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59335
59338
Welp, found an old post of mine that will always be relevant >>6560 →

In the meantime, I'm hoping Torc and Snek arrive before they kill eachother
Anonymous
/s2+g
?
No.59336
>>58626
>>59330
Hello
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59337
59339
>>59332
No response to >>59184? Okay...
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59338
59340
>>59335
I’m hoping they arrive so Stix can properly meet them. Torc only got a couple of phrases out before Stix when after Tracy... and left him.
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59339
>>59337
>>59188

Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59340
59342 59344
>>59338
Yeah, should be good...

Sorry about leaving you
/s2+g
?
No.59341
[3d20 = 30]
Kill all metalniggers!
Anonymous
tbRzj
?
No.59342
>>59340
Your fine.
Anonymous
2OBux
?
No.59343
>>59331
What was the fate of Trumpaladin's parting gift to the 5 shazbots?
Anonymous
/s2+g
?
No.59344
59345
>>59340
But your not sorry for leaving me.
Anonymous
yPY8d
?
No.59345
59346 59347
>>59344
No not really, now realize how Thez feels
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59346
>>59333
Checked
>>59345
Ooooh, sting
Anonymous
/s2+g
?
No.59347
>>59345
Shes the most powerful, so she watches the city.
Anonymous
/s2+g
?
No.59348
happy-wojak-men-s-t-shirt.jpg.cf.jpg

Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59349
59352
Alright. Where we last left off, Infernius was getting set on fire. I rolled a 6d20 for his saves, but I'll allow his player to make the roll, and weigh the results against my rolls.
Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59351
>>59350
shhhh
/s2+g
?
No.59352
>>59349
Sorry
/s2+g
?
No.59353
59354 59355
[6d20 = 71]

Anonymous
AzCrm
?
No.59354
>>59353
Oooh, a 20 AND a 1
2OBux
?
No.59355
59356
[6d20 = 68]
>>59353
Rolling