RP/Shitposting thread - D&D 3.5 base rules, subject to interpretation, review, and elaboration. Open for all to spectate, bantz, shitpost, or full-on play.
We begin this thread in anticipation of the weekend, where most of the party is gradually infiltrating the grand city of Cardishore. With disguises varying from an Emu, Barney the dinosaur, and a mexican clown,... as well as Fae who is entirely without costume, Trump, Tracy, and Infernius try to get a handle on whatever the hell is going on in Cardishore now or in general.
Meanwhile, Torcuil is working to get that damn cannon fixed on the Stray Cat. Meanwhile Stix returns (to the tower?) with not many answers, an over-sized acorn, and definitely no other surprises.
Meanwhile Thez,... poor forgotten and alone Thez who is babysitting the port so that none of the party's enemies see their departure and think "Wah ha ha ha! With them gone I will destroy their precious city!" I mean she gets it,... but still.
>sad dwelf noises
/vx/ - Videogames and Paranormal
1511 replies and 109 files omitted.
>>58944
"Yeah, sorry about that. I got bored and so I decided to scrimmage with the troops. I figure "why wait for someone to attack to test our defenses, when I can just pretend to attack and test them myself?". I hadn't expected your arrival. Don't worry, its just ki-fire. It won't burn you, and at the moment I'm using it non-lethally."
>>58945
Yes. IDs were already distributed during the application process. Though not detected (yet), Trump, Tracy, and Fae have targets on their backs.
"Yeah, sorry about that. I got bored and so I decided to scrimmage with the troops. I figure "why wait for someone to attack to test our defenses, when I can just pretend to attack and test them myself?". I hadn't expected your arrival. Don't worry, its just ki-fire. It won't burn you, and at the moment I'm using it non-lethally."
>>58945
Yes. IDs were already distributed during the application process. Though not detected (yet), Trump, Tracy, and Fae have targets on their backs.
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>>58949
Stix is still shaken from the attack.
“Listen... apparently your supposed to be a friend... but get this through your head before we continue. Me and fire... DONT MIX. Got it? I don’t know why, but I freak out when I get near it.”
Stix is still shaken from the attack.
“Listen... apparently your supposed to be a friend... but get this through your head before we continue. Me and fire... DONT MIX. Got it? I don’t know why, but I freak out when I get near it.”
>>58954
Thez crosses her arms in front of her and cocks her head to the side while looking at him thoughtfully. "Lenos will be a problem," she off-handedly remarks. Then directly, "Fair enough, though for reference," she says holding her hand out and drawing on the purplish energy, "You can see its more of an aura than actual fire, it just looks like fire from a distance," and from up close, Stix can see that it has more of a shape and movement of fluid than fire, though with observably different properties as far as gravity and localization.
Thez crosses her arms in front of her and cocks her head to the side while looking at him thoughtfully. "Lenos will be a problem," she off-handedly remarks. Then directly, "Fair enough, though for reference," she says holding her hand out and drawing on the purplish energy, "You can see its more of an aura than actual fire, it just looks like fire from a distance," and from up close, Stix can see that it has more of a shape and movement of fluid than fire, though with observably different properties as far as gravity and localization.
>>58956
He still takes a step back.
“My brain doesn’t seem to care right now what it technically is... it is still telling me to... well... best not say that. Anyway, my name is Stix.”
He still takes a step back.
“My brain doesn’t seem to care right now what it technically is... it is still telling me to... well... best not say that. Anyway, my name is Stix.”
>>58960
Trump walks around through the crowd and around the perimeter, looking for the equivalent of an Apple Store
Trump walks around through the crowd and around the perimeter, looking for the equivalent of an Apple Store
>>58960
After fiddling with the device for a long period of time, and guessing various pet-names, Tracy tries to access any information on the device in an attempt to steal Gorplemonger's identity.
After fiddling with the device for a long period of time, and guessing various pet-names, Tracy tries to access any information on the device in an attempt to steal Gorplemonger's identity.
>>58959
"Pleased to meet you Stix, I'm Thez," she thinks for a moment and chuckles, "Isn't filly out looking for sticks?" shakes her head, "Nevermind. Anyway, I can promise that you'll have no more firey-whats-it from me, but you should probably not mention that,... quirk,... in front of the short, shiny-haired guy. He's a dick. He's the reason that there's that "firetrap" sign in the hallway.
>>58962
That device is gorplemonger's identity
>>58961
I should warn you, most of the Shazbots are around the perimeter. Additionally, there don't seem to be stores in this area, though there are gates which undoubtably lead to other areas. If one has an ID that is.
>>58963
Obviously or covertly?
"Pleased to meet you Stix, I'm Thez," she thinks for a moment and chuckles, "Isn't filly out looking for sticks?" shakes her head, "Nevermind. Anyway, I can promise that you'll have no more firey-whats-it from me, but you should probably not mention that,... quirk,... in front of the short, shiny-haired guy. He's a dick. He's the reason that there's that "firetrap" sign in the hallway.
>>58962
That device is gorplemonger's identity
>>58961
I should warn you, most of the Shazbots are around the perimeter. Additionally, there don't seem to be stores in this area, though there are gates which undoubtably lead to other areas. If one has an ID that is.
>>58963
Obviously or covertly?
>>58974
Oh not just killed. I'm having to think hard here, cuz that 20 could go a number of ways. It could be a spectacular success or a magnificent failure and considering his choice of action that could be equally bad or good.
Oh not just killed. I'm having to think hard here, cuz that 20 could go a number of ways. It could be a spectacular success or a magnificent failure and considering his choice of action that could be equally bad or good.
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So, what happens?
So I'm figuring that since Infernius was going for as flashy as possible, and he rolled a 20, he somehow magnificently times his arrival with the climax of the song, which the audience generally receives as being part of the show. Additionally, a chorus of "INTRUDER DETECTED" is heard from throughout the crowd, and he sees about a dozen shiny metal mailbox-looking things headed his way on the ground.
>>58969
"Yep. The glassy-walled rooms? Same. You know, you're like the 5th pony I've seen here, where before there weren't any."
>>58969
"Yep. The glassy-walled rooms? Same. You know, you're like the 5th pony I've seen here, where before there weren't any."
>>58987
Surely they didn't think the performance was over?
Atop a gilded lioness rides a shimmering man with sword drawn, charging towards the nearest Shazbot
Surely they didn't think the performance was over?
Atop a gilded lioness rides a shimmering man with sword drawn, charging towards the nearest Shazbot
>>58988
"Rock You Like a Hurricane" plays, and Trumpaladin casts Eagle's Splendor upon himself
https://youtu.be/CGfKi6kpdTQ
"Rock You Like a Hurricane" plays, and Trumpaladin casts Eagle's Splendor upon himself
https://youtu.be/CGfKi6kpdTQ
>continues munching on popcorn
My money's on Infernius dying first, then Trump. Tracy will be the only one to survive
My money's on Infernius dying first, then Trump. Tracy will be the only one to survive
>>58992
"That's an understatement. Its complicated, but the short version is that the Port is upsetting alot of established and entrenched groups and structures. It used to be a run-down pirate port, but now its a thriving and emergent socio-economic power, particularly because we - yourself included - have used our abilities to aid and develop the community. There's plenty of people who are upset, threatened, and not to pleased about this. I think the place has been attacked 3 times? 4 times? 5? Its been hairy."
>>58993
o_o
"That's an understatement. Its complicated, but the short version is that the Port is upsetting alot of established and entrenched groups and structures. It used to be a run-down pirate port, but now its a thriving and emergent socio-economic power, particularly because we - yourself included - have used our abilities to aid and develop the community. There's plenty of people who are upset, threatened, and not to pleased about this. I think the place has been attacked 3 times? 4 times? 5? Its been hairy."
>>58993
o_o
FOR DEATH
AND AGAIN
Bridget moves a good distance away from the bots, before they explode.
Fae kicks off from the bot, nozzle severed and presumably about to enter self destruct sequence - disarmed regardless - and runs at full speed towards the next bot
>>58997
>sigh
Trump, oblivious to the fact that no one else is apparently armed, draws Vandereim and charges the nearest of Shazbots. Shazbot.
This immediately disperses the crowd in a frenzied panic, screams and cries issuing from every corner of the park as masses stream away and toward the gates. That Bitch is talking furiously into her ID, and the remaining Shazbots divide and close in on Trump and Infernius respectively. Now, am I interpreting it as Fae did the 20 pounce, and the rest is Trump breaking the bot's toys?
>sigh
Trump, oblivious to the fact that no one else is apparently armed, draws Vandereim and charges the nearest of Shazbots. Shazbot.
This immediately disperses the crowd in a frenzied panic, screams and cries issuing from every corner of the park as masses stream away and toward the gates. That Bitch is talking furiously into her ID, and the remaining Shazbots divide and close in on Trump and Infernius respectively. Now, am I interpreting it as Fae did the 20 pounce, and the rest is Trump breaking the bot's toys?
[1d20+21 = 40]
While everyone's distracted, Bridget takes advantage of the chaos to swipe another card.
While everyone's distracted, Bridget takes advantage of the chaos to swipe another card.
>>59001
In the Napoleanic wars the armies of the Austrians and the Prussians were unambiguously stronger than the army of France... but there were three of them, each one of them smaller than the French force. Napolean double marched his men to engage first an Austrian army, annihilate it, then double marched them to the next army, destroyed it, and then the same to the third force. In WW1, the Russians invaded East Prussia with a force much larger than the German force - in two armies. The Germans attacked and destroyed one, then used the rail network to quickly move their army to attack the other russian army at Tannenburg.
These Shazbots are very difficult to defeat. But taken down one by one
>>59006
The 20 is Trump with sugoito, the other three are Fae
In the Napoleanic wars the armies of the Austrians and the Prussians were unambiguously stronger than the army of France... but there were three of them, each one of them smaller than the French force. Napolean double marched his men to engage first an Austrian army, annihilate it, then double marched them to the next army, destroyed it, and then the same to the third force. In WW1, the Russians invaded East Prussia with a force much larger than the German force - in two armies. The Germans attacked and destroyed one, then used the rail network to quickly move their army to attack the other russian army at Tannenburg.
These Shazbots are very difficult to defeat. But taken down one by one
>>59006
The 20 is Trump with sugoito, the other three are Fae
>>59006
How fast are they? Fae is 180 in a charge and 360 in a run. You said they were dispersed along the perimeter. They must have started far apart
How fast are they? Fae is 180 in a charge and 360 in a run. You said they were dispersed along the perimeter. They must have started far apart
>>59010
Gotcha
>>59011
Kek, sure why not?
>>59012
^Sugoito
Pouncing eliminates Fae's movement speed, and though they're not in range, they're bee-lining toward. I assumed Fae attacked the closest one, which would have been near him as it had not detected him as a threat.
>>59013
Yes, except above
And yes, the one Fae attacked is beginning its self-destruct sequence.
Now then, roll for initiative u fags
Gotcha
>>59011
Kek, sure why not?
>>59012
^Sugoito
Pouncing eliminates Fae's movement speed, and though they're not in range, they're bee-lining toward. I assumed Fae attacked the closest one, which would have been near him as it had not detected him as a threat.
>>59013
Yes, except above
And yes, the one Fae attacked is beginning its self-destruct sequence.
Now then, roll for initiative u fags
"Okay, listen. If you stop until I get this cannon ordered, I'll help you get a gnome dinner."
Bluff [1d20 = 3]
>"I'll consider it"
Check motive [1d20 = 3]
Bluff [1d20 = 3]
>"I'll consider it"
Check motive [1d20 = 3]
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>>59019
>3&3
Well, uh...
Snek is pretty sure Torc is lying, but he's hoping Torc isn't.
Torc is wary that Snek knows he's lying, but he really need to get back to ordering this cannon
>3&3
Well, uh...
Snek is pretty sure Torc is lying, but he's hoping Torc isn't.
Torc is wary that Snek knows he's lying, but he really need to get back to ordering this cannon
>>59018
Yes, but upon pouncing her movement is halted
>many keks
These fuggin dice
Rolling for bots and That Bitch
Yes, but upon pouncing her movement is halted
>many keks
These fuggin dice
Rolling for bots and That Bitch
>>59002
Thez looks Stix up and down appraisingly, again crossing her arms. "Hmmm. How does a pony use a bow exactly?"
Thez looks Stix up and down appraisingly, again crossing her arms. "Hmmm. How does a pony use a bow exactly?"
>>59032
“Apparently, I don’t do it well. My father could though, but I suppose I didn’t pay enough attention to how he did it to actually hit anything.”
“Apparently, I don’t do it well. My father could though, but I suppose I didn’t pay enough attention to how he did it to actually hit anything.”
>>59034
A compelling argument.
>>59035
The cocks her head again, this time looking up in a random direction. She looks again in another direction before her face brightens. "I've got just the thing! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB!!" she yells.
"As far as helping, it really depends. I mean there's always stuff that can be done around here, and probably more still than I'm even aware of. Currently the party has made opponents of 1. An unidentified band of pirates, 2. The former/current emperor of this geographical area - who himself is batshit crazy and stupid OP - , and potentially many other groups who haven't so much as named or identified themselves. Oh, and we've also been pissing off/on the jews.
>>59036
XD
A compelling argument.
>>59035
The cocks her head again, this time looking up in a random direction. She looks again in another direction before her face brightens. "I've got just the thing! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOB!!" she yells.
"As far as helping, it really depends. I mean there's always stuff that can be done around here, and probably more still than I'm even aware of. Currently the party has made opponents of 1. An unidentified band of pirates, 2. The former/current emperor of this geographical area - who himself is batshit crazy and stupid OP - , and potentially many other groups who haven't so much as named or identified themselves. Oh, and we've also been pissing off/on the jews.
>>59036
XD
Tracy uses her superior speed to dash far away to a safe distance where she can hide and observe, pretending to be screaming and panicking like a sane person would.
From her hiding spot she keeps an eye on That Bitch, who seems to be a figure of authority.
From her hiding spot she keeps an eye on That Bitch, who seems to be a figure of authority.
File (): 772052EC68A438ABEF38B3BFCAC387A3-113074.png (110.4 KB, 306x598, femaleakuma_edit1.png)
"And," she whispers, "I'd bet my life that they're pissing off yet another faction as we speak."
>>59040
She also picks up anything that may have been dropped by the crowd, especially cards, and places her two additional ID cards (not Gorplemonger's) in her bag of holding.
She also picks up anything that may have been dropped by the crowd, especially cards, and places her two additional ID cards (not Gorplemonger's) in her bag of holding.
>>59041
“Any idea where they went off to then? Maybe I should help them out if they are into trouble.”
“Any idea where they went off to then? Maybe I should help them out if they are into trouble.”
>>59044
Yes. I hadn't considered Tracy as a combatant at this point, and she can interject herself if she desires, but is otherwise 'concealed' by the surging crowd who are increasingly grouping together by the gates,one by one jumping through to whatever their destination is, away from here. Some of them are holding up their IDs and talking at them in ridiculously dramatic displays.
Yes. I hadn't considered Tracy as a combatant at this point, and she can interject herself if she desires, but is otherwise 'concealed' by the surging crowd who are increasingly grouping together by the gates,one by one jumping through to whatever their destination is, away from here. Some of them are holding up their IDs and talking at them in ridiculously dramatic displays.
*urge to start looting like a nigger intensifies*
Tracy stays back at a very, very safe distance and observes.
Tracy stays back at a very, very safe distance and observes.
>>59046
I guess Trumpaladin can talk as a free action out of sequence:
To the Lady:
"I came to see what was going on. I entered with my girlfriend, but then she ran off and left me and so now I do not have my ID. I was going to ask about a replacement with a representative but there were none. I mean no harm."
I guess Trumpaladin can talk as a free action out of sequence:
To the Lady:
"I came to see what was going on. I entered with my girlfriend, but then she ran off and left me and so now I do not have my ID. I was going to ask about a replacement with a representative but there were none. I mean no harm."
>>59048
Otto von SchnitzelpuskraukengeBcheit Meyer
That German "B" that stans for a "sss" sound
and Frank
Otto von SchnitzelpuskraukengeBcheit Meyer
That German "B" that stans for a "sss" sound
and Frank
"Are you going to Scarborough Fair?
Parsley, sage, rosemary, thyme
Remember me to one who lives there
She once was a true love of mine"
Parsley, sage, rosemary, thyme
Remember me to one who lives there
She once was a true love of mine"
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