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Comfy Nuts
Anonymous
spJyI
?
No.49077
This thread begins at the start of the week, where developmental/story activity is minimal/nil and shitposting/meta is at its most emphatic.

This is an RP based on classic D&D, if you've looked at the catalog you might have noticed a trend. New players, random posters, and shitposters alike are welcome.
1126 replies and 152 files omitted.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49926
49930 49932
>>49925
You didn't think it was just going to be a one-night stand, did you?
She's got you for all eternity.

>Torc wakes up in the Entertron covered in lipstick every time he dies
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49927
49932
>>49925
What, you thought that was a one time thing? Oh no. Think about it from she-Death's perspective. How many dudes who, having encountered cards of the deck, have disarmed, not killed/attacked, and then wanted to (and did) sex death? It doesn't happen. Its a statistical anomaly, and death shall smile on Torcuil.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49929
>>49928
*Spooky
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49930
49933
>>49926
Its spoopy how alike your interpretation and my intention (by way of inspiration) align
Anonymous
R8xl7
?
No.49931
1498136599849.jpg
>>49923
>
>>49924
Jej. Wait she not gonna kill him is she?
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49932
49934
>>49927
>>49926
I never figured a one-night stand but...

This may get intresting
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49933
49935
1ea.png
>>49930
It only seemed appropriate.
Anonymous
R8xl7
?
No.49934
49936 49938
>>49932
Be a man make death your property
Anonymous
R8xl7
?
No.49935
>>49933
Fuggin saved
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49936
49941
natethesnake.com
>>49934
Does Death like snakes?
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49937
*quickly removes marker*

*starts writing "property of" on pony*
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49938
49939
>>49934
This.
Show all those gay ass lichs what real necromancy looks like.
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49939
49940
>>49938
Thats...
Thats actually not a bad idea
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49940
49960
>>49939
Lichloved is a pretty good feat too.

I'm tired. I think I might turn in soon.
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49941
49942
whoosh.jpg
>>49936
Death knows Snek. Not specifically, but generally
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49942
49943
>>49941
But does she like snakes in general?
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49943
49944
>>49942
Yes. Of course, they're adorable if you know how to interpret them and especially if one is an otherwise friendless incarnation of death.
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49944
49945
>>49943
Good to know
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49945
snek1.gif
>>49944
Hats do help tho
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49946
49947
I really want him to b a hog-nosed snek desu. They're so adorable
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49947
49948
>>49946
Hold on I have an idea.
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49948
49949 49958 49963
>>49947
Okay, I found a species of hog-nosed snake with a mild venom that gets about 6 feet long. Bonus? It can flatten its head to look like a cobra.
Can I turn this into a homebrew creature with a more toxic venom, then give it a "Hog-nosed Rod" item?
Anonymous
R8xl7
?
No.49949
>>49948
Instead of a rod how about a poisned dagger?
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49950
49952 49953 49954
I have a question for players.
How >lewd is too no?
I have an idea. Maybe

Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49951
276026-action5.jpg

SJs+h
?
No.49952
>>49950
Because lewd has consequences, it should always be explicit and never merely implied, so there is no ambiguity or uncertainty
\r
Anonymous
R8xl7
?
No.49953
>>49950
I do not care, i enjoy free speech.
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49954
49955
>>49950
I don't care at this point
Anonymous
R8xl7
?
No.49955
>>49954

Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49958
49959
>>49948
There's a poisonous version of the python rod: the iper rod. You have to be ebil to make it though.
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49959
49961
maxresdefault (1).jpg
>>49958
>ebil
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49960
49962
>>49940
Sorry I bailed last night. I was just too tired.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49961
>>49959
I was going to have Tracy make one as the handle for her ebin murder mace after she leveled up and got the Poison spell.
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49962
49964 49987
>>49960
No need to apologize, I was getting quite shmammered last night and was of little effective use
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49963
49965
>>49948
>homebrew creature
You described a huge viper.
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Huge_Viper
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49964
>>49962
Alright then.
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49965
49966
>>49963
But a hognose isn't a viper
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49966
49969
>>49965
The monster-stats of creatures are just a guide to physiology, especially for animals: they can describe any creature that generally fits their physical description.
For example, "riding dogs" can be Saint Bernards, collies, huskies, wolf-hounds.. etc.
What kind of creature were you looking for, stat-wise?
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49967
49969 49972
I want to lvl-up soon so that Tracy can summon her Pokemon...
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49969
49970
>>49966
High Dex, medium strength
>>49967
Kek
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49970
49971
>>49969
All the Sneks are listed here:
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Snake
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49971
>>49970
Tiny viper is the standard snek familiar for a sorcerer/wizard, though I assume you want a lager one.
I like how familiars are able to use their master's skill ranks.
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49972
49973 49980
>>49967
Patience

I think I can wait until Epic Leadership at level 21 for Trumpaladin's dragon
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49973
49974
>>49972
Don't you need 25 char for that?
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49974
49975
>>49973
Why yes, yes he does need 25 Charisma. You can bet that's my current goal
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49975
49976
>>49974
Wouldn't come easy, but don't stop trying.
Too bad ebin feats are so costly, I'd love to have Blinding Speed.
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49976
>>49975
That is a very nice feat. It's too bad so many of these require 25 ability points. The Divine Emissary class requires the Great Smite Feat, which also requires 25 Charisma
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49977
49978
Also, I'm an idiot for not using multiple weapons all this time when I spent the slots to give her improved multi-weapon fighting.
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49978
49979
>>49977
Not necessarily, since it reduces the CAB of each attack
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49979
>>49978
Only at a -2 penalty if using light weapons on the off hands.
The extra two from the improved feat are at a -5 penalty, but I think it's worth it.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49980
49981
>>49972
What kind of creatures count as ebin cohorts?
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49981
49982
>>49980
You can have pretty much anything as a cohort, although 1. it's effective character level must always be 2 levels below yours or more 2. you need the leadership points for it and 3. Level adjustment applies There's an expansion pack feat that lowers the level adjustment of dragons I hope GM will apply

For example, a Celestial Charger could be attracted as a cohort by a level 25 character, if they had the points for it. A Cauchemar Nightmare would be qualified for pretty much at level 21. The Epic Leadership list has an entire long list of creatures that super ebin level characters - like Thez was - having even wyern lesser dragons, or ancient and old greater dragons
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49982
49983
>>49981
How do you quantify effective character level for creatures?
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49983
49984
>>49982
Racial hit die plus character levels plus level adjustment
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49984
49986
>>49983
What about creatures without lvl adjustment?
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49986
>>49984
Those creatures were presumably never intended to be attracted as cohorts, or possibly have a level adjustment of zero. I'd look at the level adjustment and effective character levels of similar creatures
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49987
49988
>>49962
Think we could do something tonight?
I'm not busy.
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49988
49989
>>49987
Definitely. I know I flaked in a number of ways yesterday, but it was a really good day for me on a business scale and its not going to be a common thing.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49989
49996
>>49988
That's alright.
When do you think of starting this evening?
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49990
49991 49992
My character needs a quest/ambition to match her alignment...
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49991
>>49990
And her class..
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49992
49993
>>49990
You're not obligated to write your character around the alignment you gave her a few months ago, nor is she obligated to maintain that alignment. You've already changed it once. Whatever happened to "kill every celestial and magical beast"?
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49993
49994 49995
>>49992
>You're not obligated to write your character around the alignment
I'm not obligated to do anything: I want to do that.
Aside from having a semi-edgy demeanor, I haven't made very much progress in developing an ebil character. I figure a goal-oriented plan would be better for character development.
>Whatever happened to "kill every celestial and magical beast"?
That was mostly a joke.
I do want to hunt some monsters though.
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.49994
>>49993
I'm just going to repeat for Tracy something that she said to Kiynen - that was promptly redacted. "Just stay away from my husband's humans. He can get very angry when they are messed with"
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.49995
>>49993
Don't forget the most impirtant part about evil
Every
Villian
Is
Lemons

Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49996
49997
>>49989
No particular time yet, ~ 2 hours
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.49997
49998
>>49996
Okay. I should be around.
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49998
50003
>>49997
Can b sooner if players r here

Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.49999
50002
boop.png

Anonymous
7spzf
?
No.50000
50001 50002
Football
Anonymous
qIxZh
?
No.50001
image.png
>>50000
PRAISE ELWAY!
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.50002
>>49999
>>50000
Checked

When we starting?
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50003
>>49998
I would go right now, but I haven't seen Infernius all day...
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.50004
50005 50009
How the fuck are moths a symbol of death?
GM, do you consider Crows or Owls to be more of a symbol of death?
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50005
50006
>>50004
>symbol of death
Elaborate?
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.50006
50007
>>50005
Like symbolism
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50007
50008
>>50006
Yeah, but what game mechanic/lore are you referring to?
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.50008
>>50007
Ye ole tome of wikipedia and google
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.50009
50010 50012
>>50004
Between the two, I'd say crows mostly cuz the movies.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50010
>>50009
This
Scavenging birds are often symbols of death. In Norse mythology, Eagles fill that niche, because they were often seen feeding on corpses after battles. Same thing goes for vultures in Greek society.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50011
50013
While we're here, were there any visible ways of opening the doors in the chamber Trumpaladin and Tracy are in?
Anonymous
ZTPlA
?
No.50012
>>50009
Crows, gotcha
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.50013
50014
>>50011
Nope
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50014
>>50013
What about the rest of the hall? Is there anything init aside from the wooden doors?
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50015
50016
If all else fails, Tracy could just burn them down.
Anonymous
qIxZh
?
No.50016
50017
>>50015
No she can't
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50017
50018
>>50016
Yes she could.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50018
>>50017
Wood is flammable. After it burns a bit, she could use the hammer to break through and see what's inside.
qIxZh
?
No.50019
50020 50021
[1d20+5 = 20]
Fuck it

Strength check to bust down door of cell to right of entrance/on left of map
7spzf
?
No.50020
50021
[1d20+3 = 13]
>>50019
Str check to assist
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.50021
50022 50023
>>50019
>>50020
Newp, not strong enough.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50022
50023 50025
>>50021
Tracy pops out her lighter and lights the door on fire.
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.50023
50024 50025
Eh.png
>>50021
"Looks like we don't have to worry about whatever is inside escaping"

>>50022
But the door is Dimetrium...
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50024
50028
>>50023
I was referring to the wooden doors to the cells
Anonymous
US+2w
?
No.50025
50026 50028
>>50023
>>50022
In response to the light from the "lighter" the nearest cell's pile stirs with a cloud of dust and expands wispingly
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50026
50027
>>50025
*snuff's out lighter before shit explodes*
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50027
>>50026
"It looks like we have company.."
Anonymous
SJs+h
?
No.50028
50029 50030
>>50024
I thought those were heavy Dimetrium?

>>50025
Fucking assume combat stance - draw sword and "bees" ring of force shield
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50029
50031 50033
>>50028
>expensive fucking cell doors
No, just the door that trapped them in. The cell doors are wood.
Mrs. Sentry
7spzf
?
No.50030
50031
>>50028
Tracy pulls out her Summon Monster wand, and readies her sword.