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1362148__safe_screencap_pinkie pie_rainbow dash_twilight sparkle_sweet and elite_apple_balloon_birthday dress_bowl_candy_chocolate_food_lollipop_magic.png
Candied Nuts
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.19224
19228
NO HOMO
This begins yet another edition of the Game thread, this time extra sweet 'cuz Norfilly won't stop being so damn cute.

The party has successfully felled the Terrasque, removed the head from the Nerd, watched as George Soros got his fool head blown off and was BTFO yet again (how WILL he live down the infamy?) and now ventures off to collect sticks, or build telescopes, or whatever it is they plan to do now that there's a new thread that isn't over 1.1k posts.

There is now an official bath-house, and characters seem quite taken by it both in spite of and to troll any detractors who would otherwise throw salt in our fun.

This is an ongoing RPG thread geared toward D&D-esque adventuring, shitposting, funposting, bantz, shitposting, funposting, and murder.

Feel free to join! The bathwater (and blood) is nice.
944 replies and 76 files omitted.
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20081
20086 20087
>>20080
You know, all your sneaking around and shiesty shit could easily be mitigated by Tracy declaring in one way or another "Hey, in case you didn't know, I may have to sneak around and do some sheisty shit from time to time, but don't worry, you'll all be better off for it"
Anonymous
E3PAT
?
No.20082
20084
>>20077
Ikr, but now I remember how hard wood working is
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20083
20085
>>20080
>vow of silence
Don't give me any ideas
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20084
20096
>>20082
Belt-sander or table-grinder
Anonymous
vRnCD
?
No.20085
>>20080
>>20083
bad hores
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20086
20088 20091
>>20078
Infernius isn't dumb enough to piss-off Tracy when she's a pin's drop away from making Chinese Medicine out of his horn, unless he actually is, idk.
Besides, I don't intend to cause any explict ruckus among the lawful residents of Port Barry.
>>20081
I could've sworn I had her say something that months ago, but Trumpaladin just wouldn't have any of it.. Control freak...
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20087
20089
>>20081
As I said, my model for Trump good is Anerican foreign policy under Republican presidents, like Saint Reagan. Assassinations, coups, propping dictators, and giving money to Contras and Mujahadeen are entirely within the realm of acceptable behaviors. But they still need to be justified by being necessary to stop some larger evil
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20088
20090
>>20086
I'm sure you were less explicit
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20089
20092 20095 20156
>>20087
Port Barry doesn't even have a government: it's an ancap paradise, slavery and all. You don't need to self-appoint as some kind of detective.
Just stop "investigating", and there won't be anything for him to worry about.
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20090
>>20088
Perhaps, but I still wasn't sure what I was doing.
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20091
20156
>>20086
>inb4 Grapple
We're expanding our domain of protection, so be forewarned
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20092
20097
>>20089
>To avoid executing the duties of an Emperor, don't be an Emperor
Your post makes no sense to me
Anonymous
vRnCD
?
No.20094
20098
1encounterfb_by_ninjatic-d71rp93.jpg
I've finally done it!!

(FUCK YEAH!!!!)
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20095
20100
>>20089
Like it sounds like what you are saying is "don't try to save people goyim, go back to sleep." That's not persuasive
Anonymous
E3PAT
?
No.20096
>>20084
Actually, just a good piece of sandpaper would go a long way for this
>I'm just ignoiing the fighting
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20097
20099 20104
>>20092
Focus on becoming emperor first: it's generally a bad idea to act like you're in charge before you actually are, because that breeds conflict, especially in midst of a recent a recent power vacuume. Better to call your forces a factional army with a defined cause and Port Barry as their base, than to claim actual authority as a governing police force. Paladins are archytypical "crusaders", so it's better to declare the goal to take the Emperor's citadel first and then draw in associates of all kind: a Paladin cannot willingly reach out to evil or chaotic associates, but nothing forbids them from assembling diverse forces under a mutual flag.
tl;Dr: stop trying to be the police and paint yourself a banner that forces of all allignments can assemble under.
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20098
20101
>>20094
M8, that statue will take up half the city and take months to carve with your low-level stone-manipulating spell. Awesome meme though.
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20099
20102
>>20097
No no, let him. It will more fun that way for me
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20100
>>20095
No. I'm saying stop trying to get in the way of muh schemes.
Anonymous
vRnCD
?
No.20101
>>20098
thanks im gonna do a bit more to it then ill be finished for real.
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20102
20103 20107
>>20099
I figured it would be very, very, very likely for foreign forces to attack and stomp us if the local narcicist actually tried to crown himself baron or something.
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20103
20107
>>20102
Why, whatever would give you that impression,... I mean I personally had never thought of such a scenario,... at all,... ever
SHHHHHH
zMcDH
?
No.20104
20105 20107 20108
>>20097
Like, that whole post is literally exactly everything I've been doing. It's Inferius who wants to make the police force. Trumpaladin would only focus on smaller targets much later.

The reason Tracy is under suspicion isn't because she's a villain - she'd have to stand in line for smiting like every one else. It's because she makes pretensions of being Trumpaladin's waifu, and more importantly, because she is carrying Trumpaladin's child, who may or may not be the anti-Christ. Trumpaladin wants his waifu and the mother of his child to be worthy of the role. That's why she falls under more suspicion
\r
Anonymous
vRnCD
?
No.20105
>>20104
this.
Anonymous
E3PAT
?
No.20106
>tfw Tracy and Trump's faggots would have gotten into a fist fight by this point if we whee plailying in person
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20107
20109
>>20103
>>20102
I'm going to redirect everyone to >>20104 again. If you've read it, read it again. It's the most important post

Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20108
20110
>>20104
I can maintain surface-level honor, if you don't needlessly do too much deep "investigation".
Just have your character focus on rallying spirits for his crusade before you go too far in presiding over the ongoings of the areas surrounding Port Barry. It's a neutral city: they won't like being told what to do at first, even if they do cooperate.
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20109
20117
>>20107
I get that m8. I'm just using the bantz as cautionary foreshadowing. ^_^
I can't say that the next session is going to be terribly developmental as far as the story is concerned, and I'll be letting the players do the lion's share of determining what is explored and who goes where and all that. My main focus as far as sussing out the next few legs of the campaign is determining exactly how many factions were in some way connected to and active within the 'empire', and how they will respond to the news that the Emperor and his pet are dead, what does that mean for each particular group, and how they will respond to news and the increasing presence of the party.
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20110
20111 20112 20117
>>20108
On this note, he AND the party have done an exceptional job of being an inspirational presence, and have thus had little difficulty in gaining followers and participants. However, Port Barry has been almost the exclusive witness and beneficiary to the party's actions; one would be operating foolishly to assume that everyone will respond in kind.
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20111
>>20110
>inspirational presence
... Even Tracy?
Anonymous
E3PAT
?
No.20112
20113 20115
>>20110
GM, can we have Torc go on a seperate path for a while bcause I'm gonna be busy as hell for a while
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20113
20114 20115
>>20112
Side quests sound like a good idea to me too.
Anonymous
vRnCD
?
No.20114
20116
>>20113
thats why i want to help with finding a druid.
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20115
>>20112
>>20113
Yes of course. I figured thats where this was trending, for the immediate future, and everyone appears to be settling in on a particular pursuit/agenda. Plus, that will make it easier for me to provide individual challenges that don't involve adding more hit dice to creatures, or just adding more creatures.
The nerd fight went well, but largely because he underestimated the party. If he had seen the party as a threat, he'd have operated far differently, and there would be alot more craters and grease-spots
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20116
20118
>>20114
It'd be a cool way to acquire special items/weapons too.
zMcDH
?
No.20117
20124
>>20110
>Port Barry is Neutral
Did you mean to say "was"? It is now Athens after the Persain Wars, or America at the turn of the 20th Century. It is ready to take on glory.

Trumpaladin's child is more important than the crusade or the image. For that, more than mere appearance is essential.

There doesn't have to be actual honor, the targets just have to be assholes. That's literally the only request. I'm sure there are plenty
>>20109
>>20110
>how they respond to the death of Kefka
My intuition says that most will want to opperate as independent city states, while a few go on conquests, and pirate and bandit lords pop up. But my intuition also says that at least one will want some sort of protectorate relationship with the capital and whoever controls it, especially if there is no vast tribute, and especially if there is an agreement of military protection and commerce in exchange.
>no one will no the party
They will know who killed Kefja and the Tarrasque. That will mean something to them. If they feared and were subdued by him and the Terrasque, they ought to respect whoever could slay him.
\r
Anonymous
vRnCD
?
No.20118
>>20116
im ready to go when you are.
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20119
20120
Hold on, I'm gonna kill Cortana FOR GOOD
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20120
20121 20129
>>20119
Insert her into the game so I can harvest rare items from her body.
Anonymous
vRnCD
?
No.20121
>>20120
im goint to inject her into my brain.
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20123
Fuck it. Whatever
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20124
20125 20129
>>20117
>They will know who killed Kefja and the Tarrasque.
Just wait for the countless imposters who'll inevitably show up.
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20125
20126
>>20124
Then help kill them Goddamn it!
Mrs. Sentry
thd8I
?
No.20126
20127
>>20125
They'll try to rip off your speeches too, I bet.
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20127
20128
>>20126
I'll kill them myself then
Anonymous
vRnCD
?
No.20128
>>20127
ill grapple there heads in.
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20129
20131
>>20120
Kek. She isn't fully dead, but she is sealed away (not unlike the Terrasque)
>>20124
There you go, giving me ideas again
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20131
20132
>>20129
Fuck it, I'll abandon Plan A and do all of this the hard way
Anonymous
+hil5
?
No.20132
20134
>>20131
? I'm not sure I follow. I was talking about Cortana (except the ideas re: false claims of being Kefka's demise)
Anonymous
zMcDH
?
No.20134
20135
>>20132
That was more of a general statement than a reaction to that specific post