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game1.jpg
Ebil Nuts
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64148
64150
>Mixed Nuts
To some, its a delightful role-playing venture based (loosely) on 3.5e D&D rules. To others especially a particular german poster,… love you btw its the worst thing to happen to Mlpol (which is saying something, cuz there's,….).
>What it do
On weekends we engage a dynamic storyline based largely on the GM's capacity to create and illustrate the situation. Sometimes he's a faggot tho.
>What about me?
New players and shitposters are always welcome. We have prohibited excessive >lewd, and non-players can assume casual roles as available (at the moment the world is a desolate wasteland tho so not for a bit). Ordinarily we have several side-characters with their own existing backstories, as well as a few player contributions including a very sad Alex Jones or Yak Lee, a literal MLP yak trained as a monk. If wanting to play, make a post about it in thread and there's plenty of anons who can steer anon in the right direction.

For the time being the party has successfully conquered the Gigajew, and through the tunnels beneath has all-kinds-of tortured to almost death (there will be more) James Alefantis and several patrons/staff of Comet Ping Pong. Through this tunnel network, there is only one direction to go, and that is the upper path, which seems to lead toward the usurped Trump Tower.
1121 replies and 23 files omitted.
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64460
>>64459
That was the idea,....
3ZTGM
?
No.64461
[17d20 = 178]
To get the ball rolling, the CGBs are attacking. First off, Tracy needs to roll a will save, which is the first dice. The rest are attack rolls.
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64462
64463 64464 64469
Lucky, Tracy's spiked chain was not taken control of. However, I'm seeing several hits. In fact, I'm seeing Trump, Tracy, Thez (again) and Infernius need to make opposed grapple checks (d20+str).
rjnHI
?
No.64463
[1d20+2 = 19]
>>64462
Roll
eLfii
?
No.64464
64465
[1d20+3 = 22]
>>64462
Rolling

But there should be +17 base attack bonus
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64465
64466
>>64464
Bab is only for the touch attack to start a grapple.
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64466
64468
1519523051098.png
>>64465
And Tracy has 13 strength, not 14. So a +1, not a +2
3ZTGM
?
No.64467
64468
[1d20+7 = 15]
[4d20+5 = 50]

Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64468
>>64466
Ah
>>64467
If I beat the grapple, can Tracy roll to yank the chain towards her?
1uaV9
?
No.64469
64470
[1d20+16 = 32]
>>64462

Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64470
64471
>>64469
Yours is moot, he rolled a 1
Everyone passed, except Trump. There is a barbed blade sticking out of his arm now
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64471
64472
>>64470
Can Tracy counter-grapple by pulling the chain?
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64472
64473 64477
>>64471
Pulling does no good. The gnomes aren't actually swinging/attacking with the chains, they're controlling them. The chains are still secured to the ceiling somewhere. Thez maintains a ready stance, prepared to attack any attack that comes near Addy. The dispelled area of darkness around the party shrinks to a 30' sphere, and the gnomes again have concealment.
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64473
64475
>>64472
With his other arm, can Trumpaladin attempt to sever the chain barbed to him with Suigoto?
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64474
64476 64477
Addy however, whispers at Thez, "Why aren't you doing anything? You could skull-fuck these guys." which draws her a stern look.
Infernius/Stix' turn, followed by Tracy/Torcuil, then Trump (if they survive that long)

Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64475
>>64473
On his turn, yes
UCAK4
?
No.64476
64478
[3d20 = 23]
>>64474
“Is at first you succeeded in making a shot in the dark... I guess keep at it.”
Stix launches another volley of three arrows at the next target.
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64477
64478 64482
>>64472
>>64474
I summon a couatl with a stahlhelm on.
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64478
64479 64480 64481
>>64476
Unsuccessful, gud try tho. Incidentally, we were talking and there's several useful options for nonconventional arrows that Stix will want to look into later.
>>64477
With a what now?
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64479
>>64478
>>64478
A Stahlhelm is the standard German issue helmet since late WW1
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64480
M40.JPG
>>64478

Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64481
950667d1459707150-heer-m40-et62-lot-1263-stahlhelm-1-m40-et-62-german-helmet-425.jpg
>>64478

Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64482
64483 64484
>>64477
Alright, a Couatl by the name of Quetzal appears in a display of magical fireworks n shit.
"Technically, you should be summoning a CG creature rather than a LG one, but Hitler's okay with it." The giant flying serpent quips.
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64483
>>64482
Muh sides
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64484
64485
>>64482
"Hope your hungry for demonic gnomes"
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64485
64486
>>64484
Q> "I wouldn't say hungry, but I'm all out of bubblegum,...."
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64486
64488
>>64485
"Digest them,they let pedophiles rape kids to death then they revived them to start the process over."
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64487
Tracy uses a move action to gain concealment with Cloak Dance, and a standard action to cast daylight on one of the chains leading towards the creatures with her Hand of Glory.
"I didn't come here to chase midgets in the dark!" she hisses, frustrated by the gnome's concealment.
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64488
64490
>>64486
"Now who's the one with the vore fetish?"
Trumpaladin quips
rZoLl
?
No.64489
[17d6 = 74]
For the 6 gorillianth time, Torcuil makes a Mike Pence joke while casting an electric spell...

How shocking...

Anyway, Torc casts Chain Lightning on the gnome demons, targeting one and designating the others as secondary targets.
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64490
64491 64492 64493
>>64488
*displays flacid benis*
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64491
>>64490
"Oi, put that shit away before the children see it"
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64492
64495
>>64490
"Put that away!"
A>"Mom, is dad a weirdo?"
C>"This guy summoned me?"
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64493
64494 64495 64496
>>64490
"'bettin' that won't be so flacid if the gnomes get eaten right in front of you"
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64494
>>64493
>"Remember to never let me eat anything in front of these guys"
"I'll try"
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64495
>>64492
"Oops"
To Q "the paladin made me do it."
>>64493
"We will hear a metallic thud from you if we see it."
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64496
64498
>>64493
"Flashy.." Tracy says with an exasperated sigh
"Can we all talk about our kinks after we kill-off the home invaders?" she continues, scouring the darkness for any other signs of movement.
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64497
64503
Now here's the thing about chain lightning. I looked over the specs. Since they're all connected to the chain, they all take initial AND secondary damage
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64498
64499
>>64496
"MY ARM HAS BEEN IMPALED BY A CHAIN! What do you want me to do but talk?"
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64499
>>64498
F
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64501
64503
... including Trump
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64502
64504
Trump will need to roll a Fortitude save
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64503
64505
>>64497
>Zozzling intensifies
>>64501
>Jazz music stops
Now might be a good time to list reasons why I shouldn't be banned and Torc shouldn't be killed
eLfii
?
No.64504
64506 64507 64509
[1d20+21 = 40]
>>64502
Rolling
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64505
64506 64508 64511
>>64503
Fae is still alive
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64506
>>64504
I would say he passed
>>64505
Plz not again
"Fuck"
>"I'll prepare the funeral and obituary"
"I'm sure we can bring him back"
Snek then turns and mlems at Torc a couple times
>"I meant for you you fucking idiot"
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64507
64509 64510 64511 64518
>>64504
Okay good. Highly singed, but still quite alive (with very few HP remaining) Trump will be involuntarily twitching for some time, but he's not dead. The Gnomes,... they didn't make it.
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64508
64510
>>64505
Let's not waste any more spell slots.
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64509
>>64507
>>64504
*cure critical wounds*
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64510
64512 64513 64515
>>64508
Fae uses fangs and claws, not spells

>>64507
If my character can't go after males anymore I am going to be pissed
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64511
>>64507
>>64505
*licks Brad all over to make him feel better*
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64512
>>64510
I mean healing spells.
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64513
64516
>>64510
Wait, wut?
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64515
64516
>>64510
What?
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64516
>>64515
>>64513
It's a Pence meme. He doesn't want to
be cured of his chronic faggotry.
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64517
64519
>keking subsides
Alright. With the sound of a rattling of chains, three distinct thuds occur around the perimeter of the pyramid structure. Slowly the darkness dissipates, revealing the upper area of the tower, which has been covered in all sorts of weird tubes and giant wires, not to mention the piles of chains hanging everywhere.
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64518
>>64507
After covering Brad in burn-curing saliva, Tracy walks up to one of the corpses and inspects it.
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64519
64522 64526
>>64517
I shove them in my bag.
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64520
"Oh would you look at the time, Mr. Snek and I have to go do something"
>"No we don't"
>Kick
The Sorcerer runs like a gnome who reports on YouTube drama and Snek sighs before following close behind
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64521
64523 64525
reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee exudes from Trumpaladin as the barb is removed by Fae, and maybe Stix, and Fae sets him on her back
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64522
64525
>>64519
"Hey, wait. I didn't even get to see what they looked like."
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64523
64524
>>64521
*licking intensifies*
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64524
64530
>>64523
*is licked by Tracy Apparently*
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64525
64528
>>64521
*cure critical wounds*
>>64522
"Trust me you dont wanna."
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64526
64527
>>64519
C> Cast Cure Moderate Wounds on Trump until fully healed
"So, was there anything more you needed from me?
As he says this, a whooshing sound, that same whooshing sound that was there all along, increases, and sounds to be coming closer, from the base of the stairs.
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64527
>>64526
"There are more enemies around no doubt."
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64528
>>64525
"Reeee! I'll be the judge of that!" Cries the criminal body-snatcher.
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64529
"By the way, what the fuck is that whooshing sound? Do we need to call an AC repairman?"
rZoLl
?
No.64530
64531 64533
[1d20+28 = 43]
>>64524
"I'm sorry, I stumbled while casting the spell and it hit you too. I swear it was a complete accident, and I am deeply sorry"
Did someone say Bluff Check? Of course, cause I did
eLfii
?
No.64531
64532
[1d20+27 = 30]
>>64530
*Stares*
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64532
64535 64536
>>64531
>Jazz music resumes
>Keking intensifies
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64533
64534 64551 64554
bones.jpg
pinhead_by_photosynthetique-d2y9tzd.jpg
Whoooosh
Upon the party turning to look, which I would assume they might, at the base of the staircase stands bones. Except, well, he's a little different.
With all those nails in his face, he can't >doot anymore. He's charging up the stairs now.
>>64530
+28?

Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64534
>>64533
20 ranks in the skill, 5 from Cha, 3 from a snake familiar
"Uh, is that a skeleton with nails in his face?"
eLfii
?
No.64535
64537 64547
[3d20 = 23]
>>64532
Fae Pounces the Sorcerer of Lightning, who stands in the shadows

20/18/18
UCAK4
?
No.64536
64537 64547
[3d20 = 49]
>>64532
Stix shoots three arrows at the clearly guilty sorcerer of lightning.
You don’t bluff only one player and expect to get away with it.
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64537
64541
>>64535
Fuck you
>>64536
And fuck you in particular

AC is 24
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64538
64540 64541
"Uhm guys? Could you kill him later?"
Anonymous
DA3qY
?
No.64539
64543
*lenos casts force cage around fae and stix*
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64540
64542
>>64538
"Oh no it's fine, I'm quite used to it at this point"
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64541
64543
>>64537
Fae:
"Oh I'm sorry. I thought you were an enemy"

>>64538
"Then it would be premeditated"
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64542
64554 64557
TORCUIL GOT RAPED.gif
>>64540
You've got to admit this whole thing has been pretty funny
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64543
64546
>>64541
Fae's int must be lower than Infernius'
Sorry, did you guys hear something?
>>64539
At least someone isn't being a dickhead to poor Torc
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64544
64546
Meanwhile, Bones is attacking,....
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64545
FUCKING POWER OUTAGES!!! I hate this state's shitty infrastructure.
"REeeee! What'd they do to my butler!?"
eLfii
?
No.64546
64548
[1d20+6 = 10]
>>64543
Takes more than a 16 apparently

>>64544
OH SHIT! TURN UNDEAD!
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64547
64549
>>64536
>>64535
HEALING SLOTS!!!

And he beat you in that bluff
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64548
64550
>>64546
REEEE Don't destroy my skeleton!
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64549
>>64547
He beat Trumpaladin

I've still got Lay of hands points left, calm down
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64550
64552
>>64548
You don't have blackguard powers anymore right?

Besides, Tracy needs to lose something in this timeline to give her incentive to go back in time
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64551
64553
>>64533
Tracy attempts to trip Mr, Bones with her chain, seeing as how he was a 1 HD skeleton last time she met him.
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64552
>>64550
Save those slots for when you need them.
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64553
64555 64558
>>64551
No, Trump very clearly turned him. He would blow up quite quickly and effortlessly
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64554
>>64533
>>64542
"Reeeeee bones!"
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64555
64559
>>64553
"WHY?!" Tracy screams, clearly upset
Anonymous
eLfii
?
No.64556
Trumpaladin heals the poor wounded Sorcerer with Lay of Hands points
Anonymous
1uaV9
?
No.64557
>>64542
Ill be finding spliting fae in half later hilarious.
Anonymous
rZoLl
?
No.64558
64559
>>64553
Wait, THAT'S what turning does?
Anonymous
3ZTGM
?
No.64559
64560 64564
>>64555
"And what would you have done? Reasoned with him? Like the Gnomes? This isn't our world anymore. That's why we're doing this."
>>64558
Depends on the circumstances. In this case, he's high enough of a level that destroying a 1hd undead would be simple
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64560
64562 64563
Tracy sweeps up the remains of her butler in a little pile, her lip quivering.
>>64559
Tracy just hangs her head, still clearly upset.
Mrs. Sentry
rjnHI
?
No.64561
64566
So, wait, why did Fae attack Torc?