Thus we begin the 53rd Nuts thread. There'd be more, except I've gotten lazy and won't bake until threads are ~1500 posts now.
Its an RP thread based on core D&D rules (3.5e particularly). Anyone can shitpost, comment, or play as they prefer, though making a character does require a small bit of detail.
The party is currently almost totally divided. Not on philosophical or moral grounds, they're just not in the same place at the same time. Infernius is kidnapping Trump for some reason, who was headed to check out the Sil wall, which is a concept he's only recently heard of, but will probably like.
Tracy is headed to Cardashil to stab things and (maybe) get her previous stash of knives back from.
Stix is exploring the primeval forest, intent on finding Trollestia (?), while Torcuil and Snek - when they're not attacking one another - are taking the airship to Krenshall.
Thez hasn't been seen since learning that Kefka is still (again?) alive, which she seemed most emphatically not pleased to discover.
Its mid-week, so it won't shouldn't, but probably will get hairy until later. So then, go nuts.
1577 replies and 145 files omitted.
>>57726The gnomes are fucking amazing. Doing a great job GM
"Iwaswonderingiftherewasanyoneherethatcouldhelpmerepairandunderstandtheoriginsoftheship."
>inb4 "AFUCKINGHUMAN" Is brad still trying to talk his way around the portal, or did he go with Tracy?
>>57724Perfect timing. A small tree just fell about 2 hours ago, and I just finished hauling it out of the yard.
Stix notices and remarks jokingly;
“You wouldn’t happen to be this Trollestia I’m hearing so much about, would you?”
He lets out a chuckle.
>>57729"Whatdoyoumeanrepair?"
"Watch,he'sprobablysomebroke-asswhowantssomeonetofixitforfree,"
"..."
"Whatsitlooklike?"
>>57732"You're awfully quick for a newbie," the squirrel responds. "So who sent you?"
>>57715No immediate sounds are apparent, and beyond the hole is a series of remarkably clean and well-maintained (not to mention aesthetic) civic landscaping, paths, and architecture.
>>57735GOES THROUGH THE HOLE
What kind of civic landscaping?
[1d20+21 = 31]>>57735"Fuk da police!"
*Tracy disappears and brings Brad with her if he wasn't already there*
>>57731"Technically, I'm already legally registered, so this counts as lawful."
Tracy, very discreetly, goes through the hole
Rolling to move silently
>>57735“It was a fifty-fifty chance that I saw talking to you or looking dumb while you were standing behind me. I was sent here by this knight looking man by the name of Trumpaladin. You have heard about him, right?”
>>57735"NoIdon'tfuckingexpectitforfree!
Let'ssee,it'satwodeckshipwith15cannonsononeside.It'sliftandpowerisfromalaargechunkoffloatstoneandpropellors"
>>57738"Heard,... yes we'll leave it at that," the squirrel says
>>57736Well, kind of like a city-scape, in that its heavily concrete and artificial structures. Its all designed to be pleasant and not atrocious. Some paths lead to park-looking areas with a variety of gardens and potted plants, while others lead to civic areas with what appear to be shops and trades. The whole city is not visible from this point, but the general sense it evokes is "this is nice".
>>57739"Canonsononeside?"
"Twodecks?"
"AFUCKINGHUMAN,"
"AFloat-stone?Ishouldhaveknown.PersonallyI'vebeenwaitingtohearaboutwhathappenedtotheStrayCat,...that'sthenameoftheshipyou'redescribing,eversinceoldMaglintiouswentoffonhisfoolventure."
>>57741Trumpaldin walks down the city scape and observes his surroundings. What does the purpose of the structures appear to be (like shops or government buildings or what have you) and
are there people?
>>57741Tracy puts the stones slab back in the hole, and promptly disguises herself.
>>57743"Because I'm sure
everyone around here knows who you are and what you look like" Trumpaladin says, walking in the open and glistening in the light
>>57741“Excellent. He told me to come here to get a better idea of where I am and possibly what I should try to do here, if you have the time. I hear talk of many threats in this land and I am not sure if I will know how to combat them, or even find my way around this world to be of any use against them.”
>>57742Not immediately, they're in a relatively quiet section of the city, though the murmurings of activity reverberate through the compound, which is not precisely a dome but more of a curving wall that appears to be a dome surrounding the city. The tallest buildings compliment the wall such that from the ground outside it seems a solid structure but is open-air. Sunlight beams down upon the pavement, which shows not the slightest bit of debris or dirt (out of place, that is).
>>57744"No, I'm just not the best at quick disguises, so I want to be able to go back to my regular attire if some starts chasing us from this point on."
>>57746Interesting. he walks down thee street, and towards the sounds of activity
>>57747"Uh... okay"
>>57744checked and kekd
>>57747Thats a remarkably tactical choice, tho for braincannon I prefer pic related
>>57745"And where do you think you are?"
>>57748Tracy throws some dust in Brad's face that makes him look like Bigbird.
>>57749“Now that is an interesting question depending on how you look at it. I suppose the simple answer would be in a grove in some far away land from where I was. But if I recall... it is something more complex than that. I hear this ninja talk about how I was dead yet chosen to be here or something. It was confusing, but it seems to make as much sense as any other explanation for not being back home.”
>>57749Done
When she hides and removes her disguise,
nobody will suspect that the blue horse who comes out of hiding was actually the Mexican clown they were chasing.
>>57751Not even, I'm just a massive autist... >>57749Big Bird and La Payasa continue down the street, observing their surroundings and generally heading in the direction of the sound of activity
I got a wee bit distracted>>57741"Soyouknowtheownerofship?AndyousaiditwascalledTheStrayCat?Hemusthavehaditstolenfromhim,thepeoplewhoattackedmeandmyfriendscalledthe____Cunt"
I can't remember the name
>>57754La Payasa darts around corners ahead of bigbird in stealth, to make sure (s)he spots anything that might be coming up ahead.
>>57754And strangely, considering the previous line, they're somehow not the most colorful people around. There's not any ppl around, but yeah.
>>57753I meant in the crowd
>>57752"Yes, yes, you died. Everyone dies. Do you think this is the first time you've lived? That this pony form is the first (OR the last) you've inhabited? The correct answer is "here", and everything else is derived from that. I know it sounds stupid, but its the best explanation that you're likely to get, given that "what was" is now irrelevant, and the question is then "what shall be?", which is something only you can determine."
>>57757Wait, is the area vacant, or are the people who are around as colorful as those outside?
>>57759The people are as colorful, except that they're not around. I'm just letting you know that the bright, giant bird and the mexican clown are somehow not unusual.
>>57757La Payasa makes sure not to be seen, while big bird walks down the street, making sure to take in the surrounding areas.
Beneath the disguise, Tracy wonders where her knives may have been kept.
>>57759"That's odd... These guys aren't flamboyant as the line of pricks that were entering earlier..."
>>57761Forget that last line.
Btw, the Mexican clown is also a ninja.
>>57757Takes a moment to think about that.
“Yep. Sounds about right. I suppose I’m just a tad nervous about the shear number of ways I could mess up. Do you have any tips on where to go from here, or is that up for me to determine as well?”
[1d20+9 = 15]
Knowledge Local check, to get a hunch where Tracy could go to find her lost equitpment, or at least ask about it
A barely-visible shadowy aura rises off of La Payasa as Tracy channels divegrass energy.
>>57765Fail. Tracy has no knowledge of the local situation, so she can't have any knowledge
Curses, Mlp went for the orchestrated Giddy, I was hoping to gather anons to do a voice-over of that one
>>57767La Payasa continues looking around, sneaking further into the city with Big Bird in tow.
>>57767Within the enclosed area do any structures particularly stand out?
>>57727>>57728A cute!
*pets dogger*
"You got a name big guy?"
>>57772Wellyeahiamm8howareyou?huhareyouwellm8?
>>57773?uoy era woh, enif gniod ma I
>>57774.Doog ytterp gniod mi yas attoga i
*crackles with dark energy*
Alright, now that the only other important match is over, what do Tracy and Brad find in the city?
>>57785What city? Your supposed to be back at the campsite.
>>57771*blink* *blink* Infernius fails to make contact, as the dog has this weird tendency to shift apparent position without moving. The dog however, seems to think this is a delightful game and starts running around him, his tail going bonkers.
>>57785Holy shit what a match tho
>>57787They're outside Cardashil
>>57790What do they find?
Are there any street-signs?
>>57787You were gone a while... He called in Tracy and proceeded to the next city, which is Cardishore
>>57789HE FOUND BARBAS
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C2fN6BCJrx4 >>57787Keep feeding it bacon until it can't move.
>>57794Good plan.
>>57793*sad faggot noises*
>>57789Uses true seeing on the doge.
And feeds more anti jew bacon.
>>57792Too much green,look at tracys pic for reference.
>>57802Catching the dog is more fun.
What do Brad and Tracy encounter?
Tracy needs some spooky rainbow stockings.
What kind of item works in the form of socks?
>>57803Trump and Tracy,... er Big Bird and El Juapo find that Cardashil is a very large and rather modern (to the impression of their respective faggots) styled city. There is a degree of artistry to the architecture and aesthetics, except in a contemporary sense. The buildings are very utilitarian and have a distinct overall sense of planning to them, as adjacent buildings display a comparable style. There are sections that grow increasingly fine, and the buildings are increasingly smaller in those areas. There doesn't seem to be many people in this area, and there are smaller and larger paths available.
>>57806*notes to craft Socks of Sockiness*
>>57805El Juapo gravitates towards the apparent center of the city in stealth.
>>57805Do the buildings look like they are actually lived in?
>>57809Let's find out.
>>57805*knocks on door*
"Do you have a moment to hear about our Lord and Savior John Elway?"
She says, still in full disguise
>>57808That would be the larger paths. The smaller paths - I should have mentioned - seem to follow along and in the area of the outer wall of the city.
I'm not gonna get super in depth in the descriptions except as necessary, as Cardashil is a larger city than Port Barry.
>>57809Certainly, and the smaller - as far as residence is concerned - the more ornate, distinct, or artistic. It gives the impression that the higher one's status in the city, the more private and luxurious the accommodations.
>>57812Tracy knocks on one of the smaller houses.
>>57812Important question: Are there any guards, policemen, cameras, or other forms of public defense apparent?
>>57816None at all. There is a strange metal device rolling down the path in Tracy's direction however.
>>57814"Yes,thepreviousownerwasadamnfoolwhowentpiratehunting,hadtheCatmadeexpresslyforthatpurpose.Ratherbent,thatfellow.Apparentlyhegotscammedbysomepiratesandthensworerevenge.Inresponsehecommissionedacrewandashiptochaseafterthem,butthatgottakenandthecrewwasslaughtered(excepthim,theythoughthewasprettypathetic).Thenhehiredmercenariestohuntthepirates,butgetthis,themercenariesWEREpiratesandtheyrobbedhimAGAIN!Sohecomeshereandsayshewantsaluxuryairshiptohuntpirateswith.Hewantsittobetotallybareononesidebutalineofcannonsontheother.Figureshecantrickthepiratesintothinkingtheshipisunarmeduntilhebanksandlightsthemup.Sowemadetheshipforhim,andthatwasthelastwesawofeither."
[1d20+25 = 40]
Sleight of hand to conceal dagger
TRYING ONCE AGAIN
>>57817"Huh,wellthatsastory.Arethegnomeswhobuiltthecannonsstillinthebuisnes?"
>>57821Close, the very middle stone.
"Mostof'em," he says with a slight twinge of cheek, while the other gnomes burst into laughter
Can y'all take another look at that South Korean on the main page? I still can't figure out if he's a autistic "sovereign citizen" from 8chan or if he is a disinformation artist
>>57823I can’t hardly make sense of that guys, but obviously a troll. He refuded debate and triggered a pony porn shutdown attempt by some anons. But you already knew that. Oh, he claims to not be Korean, so there is that.
>>57824I can’t spell today! Agh!
>>57822What do i see with true sight?
>>57824You think he's insincere?