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robocop (6).jpg
Hitler's Nuts
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.40838
40847
Is it a RP thread? Is it a shit/fun-post thread? Is it a bantz thread?
Its all 3. Welcome to Mixed Nuts, where we do wtfe and have fun (mostly) doing it, while doing our best to coerce and manipulate one another and see what kinda shit we can get away with, while seeing what kinda shit we can get one another to do.
Don't deny it faggots.
The party's latest venture was BTFO'ing Ruth Bader Ginsberg, Nancy Pelosi, and Dianne Feinstein (who eats poo BTW). There's still an awful-big building floating in the water, and the party has designs to try and get inside, but I'm not about to even start that shit until the weekend, cuz in true form, the moment I leave for meat-space there's another 200+ posts when I get back.
These faggots,....
Anyhow, please note that while players are called faggots, blatant and obvious and unquestionably gay shit is not permitted. It is role-play, but keep it hetero, or u will die.

New players are welcome, to start or just to pop in and shitpost, but don't get mad when,....
Pic cuz I fucking felt like it. Xp
1119 replies and 150 files omitted.
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41575
41576
>>41574
Alright. Would all or most of them have 12s in strength or dexterity?
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41576
41579
>>41575
Presumably, since those are the attributes Trump would be looking for in particular when he formed the Generals.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41577
41579 41581
Are there ways to increase your stats in game? Tracy could use some moar Charisma.
jUW0k
?
No.41579
41581 41582
>>41576
For the purpose adding a strength rating to the primary weapon (a composite longbow), could all be considered to have 12 strength (or possibly 13)?

>>41577
>>41578
You get one additional ability point at level 16. Aside from that, items give bonuses, and wish spells can give bonuses
\r
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41580
Can I get Tracy's Constitution score again?
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41581
41583 41586 41606
>>41577
>>41578
Aside from magical items - the kind that usually involve Wish or the like to craft - only by gaining levels. I think it's +1/4 levels
>>41579
I have it at 11 in pony form

Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41582
41597
>>41579
I would put it at 1/4 of the generals have 13, 1/4 have 12, and 1/2 have 11, in both for simplicity's sake.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41583
41584 41585
>>41581
>11 in pony form
That's lower than I thought..
So she's got
>19 Dex
>16 Str
>13 Wis
>11 Char
>11 Int
>11 Con
Right?
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41584
>>41583
In pony form, that seems about right
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41585
41586 41587
>>41583
Wrong

Str 11
Dex 19
Con 10
Wis 9
Int 13
Cha 11

See >>12210 →
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41586
41588 41589 41590 41594
>>41581
>items needing wish
Wish itself can also increase stats, can't it?
>>41585
That doesn't make any sense.
Why would her Wis be lower than that of a regular hoers?
Poners should get a +2 modifier for Char...
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41587
gala_ep_pony_shrug_by_0_capslock_0-d6hvybg.png
>>41585
I have so many charts at this point, its hard to be certain if I'm looking at the right one.
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41588
41591
>>41586
Because Tracy is unwise
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41589
41591 41592
>>41586
Why would Tracy's Strength be higher than that of a human three times her size?
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41590
>>41586
Well, that's what I meant. I messed up the structure of that sentence
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41591
>>41588
Tracy has street smarts.
And she knows the games are rigged.
>>41589
Muh Earth Pony Magick.
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41592
41593
>>41589
>mudhorse
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41593
41598
>>41592
This
Also, see >>41569

Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41594
>>41586
The rules on wish 4 perma-stats is thus:
+1 to +5 can be applied to a character for one stat, which requires successive casting of wish (meaning, get 5 dudes to cast it at the same time). No more than +5 can be granted in this way, and casting in any way non-successively does not stack.

Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41597
41599
>>41582
Okay, now for the even more real question: when taking the weapon focus feat, does it apply to a type of weapon - like composite longbow - or to a specific weapon - this composite longbow
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41598
41600 41604
>>41593
Ehhhh, I guess.
First I gotta actually understand half the meta shit you guys talk about before I go deciding on a mount
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41599
41601
>>41595
You can do that once per ability score, meaning +1 to +5 for each stat. Good luck finding sufficient ebin wizards who will readily contract for that though. That shit costs alot of exp
>>41597
It applies to the type
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41600
41601
>>41598
It's not a mount, it's a spell to conjure one for a ride.
You could also collaborate with Infernius to craft a Stone Horse, if you want something more permanent.
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41601
41602 41614
>>41599
>Good luck finding sufficient ebin wizards who will readily contract for are stupid enough to do that though. That shit costs alot of exp
Hi
>>41600
>Stone Horse
I'm listening
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41602
41603 41605
741.png
>>41601
Hi
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41603
41604 41609
>>41602
So wait, what stats do you need boosted?
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41604
41607
>>41598
Well...

You don't get a Special mount like a Paladin, nor the Blackguard's fiendish servant. You do get a familiar but snek is your familiar. Trollestia would let you ride her, and she's better than a normal mount, but she is MIA. You can always summon a pony or horse. You can buy a horse. I'm not sure if you can get a pegasus but... get a pegasus. Get a stallion so people don't fight to fuck it

>>41603
Wait really? Intelligence, Dexterity, Charisma, or Strength are all ones I'd love boosted
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41605
41608 41609 41616
434666__safe_artist-colon-vicmanone_oc_oc only_oc-colon-tracy cage_close-dash-up_portrait_scrunchy face_solo.png
>tfw you have higher Char as a man-eating fiend than you do as an adorable poner
>>41602
"... Flashy.. You think I'm cute, right?"
[self-conscious pony noises]

Anonymous
rK3GF
?
No.41606
41607 41608 41609
>>41581
If i remember correctly you can also increase stats by praying to your diety and hoping that it is in a good mood plus you need a high roll to get it the problem is if you get a low roll it can lower your stat instead
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41607
41612
>>41604
What the fuck did you think I mean by "a wizard stupid enough?"
You get one, but you gotta think of something good to give Torc for it
>>41606
>infernius tries to raise int
>rolls 1
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41608
41609 41610
>>41606
Fuck yeah!

>>41605
"Well... when you can't see your ribs through your skin, when your pupils aren't like a cat's, when your eyes don't have that creepy dead look, then sure. You look cute. There's no helping that mane style though"
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41609
41612 41613
>>41603
So you're just coughing up experience then? One doesn't simply cast wish.
>>41605
Charisma doesn't equal comeliness
>>41606
>>41608
GM would have to be really drunk to allow that

Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41610
41612
>>41608
>he was honest
Have fun when she stirs Trump's haggis
Anonymous
rK3GF
?
No.41611
One gm i had required a natural 20 to raise a stat one point but anythong below a 10 lowered it one point
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41612
41613
>>41609
I already know what I'm asking you for the next time you are drunk and vulnerable

>>41610
She loves me for who I am. Maybe

>>41607
Neat. Anything you want?
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41613
41615
>>41609
>coughing up
Hell no, I'm not a fucking socialist.
Now, if we where to come an agreement where Trump got Torc some cool shit, now we could talk.

Also, did Torc ever find anything out anout his new staff thingy. You said it was abjuration, and thats it
>>41612
>want
Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41614
41618
580311__suggestive_artist-colon-acstlu_boulder (pet)_maud pie_maud pie (episode)_clothes_female_hooves_panties_plot_side_skirt_solo_solo female.png
>>41601
>Stone Horse
It's a wondrous item. It takes Flesh to Stone AND Animate Objects though, so you'd need a Cleric or a Bard to help you finish it.
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Stone_Horse
You know what the best part is? It only turns back into a warm-blooded animal with the Stone to Flesh spell, so you don't have to worry about lawless, non-wizard horse-thieves causing drama.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41615
>>41613
>staff
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Staff_of_Abjuration
Good for defense.
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41616
41617
>>41605
*hugs pony*
"This is my waifu. There are many like it, but this is one of mine"
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41617
>>41616
[happy pony noises]
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41618
41619 41644 41645
>>41614
Torc can do clerical spells, so that should be fine
Anonymous
Ktiev
?
No.41619
>>41618
Sound investment, imo.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41620
41621
Will we get into combat tonight?
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41621
41623 41627
>>41620
Hopefully before then. Technically combat already started and hasn't continued.
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41622
41624 41625
*puts on armor*
Anonymous
Ktiev
?
No.41623
41627
>>41621
*dresses husbando in armor, like a big doll*
Anonymous
Ktiev
?
No.41624
>>41622
No.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41625
41626 41627
>>41622
Does your Character have Mounted Combat? She could skip the armor altogether if he had it.
>is starting to regret letting those giants walk away.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41626
>>41625
she could ship her armor*
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41627
41628 41680
>>41621
While Tracy was relentlessly advancing time earlier, Trumpaladin went to comfort, inspire, and generally check with the Generals, to talk to and comfort Slovenia, who did very well the previous day, and of course to help Felicia adjust by helping her to breakfast covfefe, and a set of canvas from the crafting area

>>41623
*is dressed by poner*

>>41625
No... A paladin's mount has a massive natural armor bonus, and Tracy's mounted form includes the unreasonably high AC of the 3.5 version of the Nightmare.
Do not mention the giants
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41628
41629 41630
>>41627
>Trumpaladin went to comfort, inspire, and generally check with the Generals
I think it would've had to have been within the tower. The Port is literally under fire.
You should have enough time to put on your armor and grab/prepare your weapons though.
Take one of Tracy's lances, and put that tower shield that you never use in her bag.
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41629
>>41628
I mean in the morning, during that period of time you had Tracy search for Trollestia and hunt and train on the holodeck
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41630
41631 41633
>>41628
He specified earlier, not atm
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41631
41632
>>41630
Oh, so they're both still in the bathhouse?
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41632
41634
>>41631
I don't understand your question. He's saying that well before any of this happened, during various times where Tracy and GM were the only ones active and were doing all manner of things, Trump wants to have gone about the Generals as described. I'll allow it.
jUW0k
?
No.41633
41637 41638
>>41630
Perfectly hypothetical, but what's the DC on a diplomacy check to have sex with Slovenia. And Felicia while we're speculating
\r
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41634
41635
>>41632
I'm just wondering where the characters are.
I know that Lenos, Thez and Infernius are outside.
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41635
41636
>>41634
I had imagined Trumpaladin and Tracy were in a gold-plated hottub or small pool in the Tower
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41636
>>41635
>not using the new bathhouse
Don't worry, they're on the water side.
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41637
41639
killme.gif
>>41633
>mfw having to calculate the answer to this question, cuz I know its only a matter of time
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41638
41639
>>41633
Don't cause more drama than is needed.
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41639
41640
>>41638
I know. That's why it's a hypothetical and not a "roll to fuck Slovenia while she's still excited from Trebuchets"

>>41637
Well, the purpose of the Diplomacy feature is to improve NPC attitudes. I've buffed the fuck out of Trumpaladin's Diplomacy score, although I never use it because RPing it is so much more fun. But to improve the attitude of an NPC from "unfriendly" to "helpful" is 40 DC, and to improve the attitude of a hostile NPC to helpful is 50. Slovenia seems to already be at "helpful," which means "will take risks to help you." To improve her to "Fanatic," which means "would give life for you," would be another 50 DC. Although I think she's already been diplomacied before, so there may be a limit to how much she can actually be improved
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41640
41641
866230__safe_pinkie pie_doubt_earth pony_faic_female_frown_glare_image macro_l-dot-a-dot- noire_mare_meme_pony_reaction image_reference_solo_suspicious.jpg
>>41639
>hypothetical
... Yeah.. sure....
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41641
41642
>>41640
Oh come on. "Roll to fuck the barmaid" is such a common occurrence that I'm actually almost surprised it's not already included in the insanely detailed set of 3.5 edition rules. Tell me you aren't yourself curious as to what the DC would be

Also, why is she so mean to him? reeeee let him have a couple more long term sexual relationships
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41642
41643
>>41641
*nibbles ankle*
[concerned pony noises]
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41643
41653
FANMADE_cute_Fluttershy,_Pinkie_poker_face.gif
>>41642
>pic related
*Pets horsey on the ears*
"What's wrong little pony?"
Anonymous
S10Bb
?
No.41644
41645 41646 41656
>>41618
infernuis is the most useless character.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41645
>>41618
At what level?
>>41644
That isn't true.
I'm the one who hasn't detected any traps, assassinated any targets, or picked any locks...
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41646
41647
>>41644
Aww, don't feel that way, you're insanely useful
*pets minotaur*
"You know you're a lot bigger and strong than me. Than any of us, really"
Anonymous
S10Bb
?
No.41647
41648 41649
>>41646
"me only good for smashing things, and Hitler obviously doesn't care about me."
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41648
41650
>>41647
"Pfft! Smashing is useful. And you are useful for more much more than smacking. You're the best lover here. Very impressive your love is. A great spell caster as well.

Don't be fooled by Lord Hitler's rough, shitposty way of talking. That's just to scare the leftists and degenerates away. He's soft and cuddly on the inside, and he's impressed by you. He's hard on you because he has high expectations for you. He knows you're capable of much. But he loves you. I love you"
*hugs Minotaur*
Anonymous
S10Bb
?
No.41649
1514673970820.gif
>>41647

Anonymous
S10Bb
?
No.41650
41651
>>41648
"he loves me so he wants to kill my child?"
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41651
41652
>>41650
"Oh, that's just him being abrasive. He doesn't want you to kill your child. He just has likes things to be perfect and he has high standards. But he knows your love is pure minus the race mixing part. And he knows your heart is great and strong"
*hugs tightly*
Anonymous
S10Bb
?
No.41652
41654 41657
>>41651
"me don't believe you, me be at the sticky wickett."
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41653
41654
>>41643
*wraps self around ankle*
"....... You wouldn't ever cheat on me again, would you, Flashy?"
*trusting gaze*
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41654
41655
>>41652
"Isn't there like explodey shit outside? I'm telling you. Where as Elway only demands of his followers that they be 70% football on any given day, Hitler wants the very best. A demanding deity, but a loving deity."

>>41653
"D'aww that's cute. What do you mean, little pony?"
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41655
41660
>>41654
"I'm your waifu, you don't need any other mares, right? If you ever need it, just come to me.."
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41656
41658 41659
>>41644
Bullshit kek
In all honesty Torc is, just because I have no idea wtf I'm actually doing.
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41657
41660 41666
>>41652
Yeah, you're still being shot at by cannons. If there's enough ppl on, we were gonna get combaty
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41658
41663 41664
>>41656
... and with this it looks like just about everyone is here
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41659
>>41656
Just try to come up with good quality memes and we'll figure it out.
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41660
41661
>>41657
I've been begging my family to get us to get food for a while now. So I'll have to leave soon

>>41655
"Aww... Little pony, me hugging Felicia or kissing Slovenia or sticking Trollestia doesn't mean you're not good enough for me. You're plenty good enough. You're a wonderful little mare"
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41661
41662
>>41660
"It means something to me though... a lot.. Please don't mess around with other mares..."
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41662
41667
>>41661
*Picks up pony*
*puts her on his lap*
*pets pony*
"I mean, I guess if you really don't want me to, I can stop..."

*pets pony*

"I didn't know you didn't want me to do that... what exactly is it you don't want me to do again?"
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41663
41664
>>41658
So are we starting?
jUW0k
?
No.41664
41665 41669
>>41663
>>41658
I'm delirious from hunger but it looks like I won't be leaving for a while
\r
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41665
41669
1249616.png
>>41664
u could always >pic related
Seriously though, where we last left off, Thez is standing about 1000' in midair, Lenos is floating to the ground like a feather, also from about 1000', and Infernius is on Uatchit. Trump and Tracy are in the tower, and Torcuil is,... uhm,....
Anonymous
S10Bb
?
No.41666
41671 41673 41674
>>41657
tats okay i still walk to the wickett.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41667
41668
1920.jpg
>>41662
"Flirt, buck, grope, romance, seduce, eat dinner alone with, or otherwise cohort with other females."
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41668
41670
>>41667
"That's a long list. Baby steps, little pony. I won't have sex with other females though, for you"
Anonymous
Bm++O
?
No.41669
>>41664
RIP
>>41665
Tower, last I remember he got a meat bun from Tracy
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41670
>>41668
"Like I said, if you ever feel like you need to, just come to me.."
*kisses*
"Alright?"
Anonymous
MwlG2
?
No.41671
41672 41673 41674
>>41666
Infernius, in spite of the moments-ago concluded free-fall sex, which only concluded because Lenos came out of nowhere attached to a flaming keg, resulting in a huge explosion, inexplicably slumps his shoulders and directs Uatchit to the Sticy Wicket cuz,... reasons?
Something like that?
Anonymous
S10Bb
?
No.41672
41675
>>41671
>cuz,… reasons?
cuz the Deity he devoted his life to told him to kill the only thing he wanted in his life and hes having a hard time dealing with it.
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41673
41675
>>41671
Tracy and Trump were fucking while the Port was being firebombed, so it's not that bad..
>>41666
Don't get too drunk though..
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41674
41676
Infernius right now.gif
>>41670\\
*rubs pony in a "whose a good girl" kind of way*
"Alright little pony. And you don't be too evil, or evil in ways that make me have to go after, okay little pony?"

>>41666
>Satan Trips
Gif related

>>41671
>Reasons
He feels like Hitler doesn't love him enough
Anonymous
jUW0k
?
No.41675
41677 41679
>>41673
My excuse is that I was at the movies and then driving and I missed what the fuck was going on and also didn't want to acknowledge the things outside

>>41672
I don't remember there being a command to kill the child
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41676
41678
>>41674
*rolls over*
[happy pony noises]
Mrs. Sentry
Ktiev
?
No.41677
>>41675
When he asked what to do since Thez was pregnant, his response was "gas".