Well now. The characters find themselves in an entirely different Rick than the last time they found themselves in a pickle. In this instance, the Paladin has just participated in murder, and it wasn't even the right target! Tracy also has bloody on her hands, but that's old news anyway.
Not sure how its gonna go, cuz some players are indisposed (at the moment) and there's usually hella bantz for every several-hour period, but why wait? ^_^
Oh, if you're new, this is an RP thread based (increasingly) loosely on D&D 3.5, but allowing for any genre or game (but it has to make sense). Feel free to shitpost, or bant, or even join in. Some call this the gay bath-house, but that's cuz they're bored and tired and don't have anything fun to distract themselves with,... like this thread. ^_^
1132 replies and 100 files omitted.
>>39836Infernius and Trumpaladin have, as have Trollestia and Torcuil. You want to face down Clinton when your cleric and Paladin are spent?
>>39838Infernius isn't spent. He has plenty of spells, not to mention melee.
>>39839What is the benefit of not sleeping and waiting to attack the next morning? And yes, he's used shit loads of healing spells
>GM wonders whether he should save Tracy and Infernius time and effort
>>39840>What is the benefitI'm impatient.
I at least want to see if it can be broken.
>>39841GM, can cute sex horse or any of the Generals or any of the Spartans use a cannon?
>>39842And let the lichs inside fly into the city and kill people while we don't have the spells to help kill them?
>>39845my sword kills them just fine.
>>39846This.
>>39844Pretty sure that only works on living things.
>>39846Why not wait until you have sword and spells both?
>>39848You could say the same thing about the enemies.
>>39847>>39846I swear to God I am the guy who yelled at Custer asking him why the hell he didn't want to bring the Gattling guns to face the Sioux in battle
>>39849The big ones in the lair didn't see combat. They are fresh and ready
>>39851They could also be planning a ritual to destroy the entire port at once.
>>39853Ebin Spells are Nuke-tier.
>>39854And they can be made in 10 hours?
>>39843Yeah sure, enough of them have been around the docks and whatever to use them.
>>39844No
Upon saying Kek, the whole pyramid writhes and shakes, as though having a heart attack.
I'm kidding, its an inanimate object, not a living thing, and even if it was living, Kek (or any of the words') efficacy is based on hit dice.
>>39850Lol
>>39852Just offering that they're probably stuck inside due to the dimensional lock Torcuil placed
>>39856I feel like going in anyway.
>>39846Try Earthquake. Even if it doesn't collapse it, it has to do some damage.
Cross-thread remider that the 99999 and 100000 get are <200 posts away
>>39856Trumpaladin's move then is to gather the remaining Generals and Spartans, as well as the Cute Sex horse, and have them take any cannons that have been refitted, place them on the docks, and have them all target one spot n the pyramid a little above the water line. At the same time, take the Jolly Cunt, load and aim its cannons at the same spot. At the same time, have cute sex horse fire the Trebuchet at the same spot. Keep firing from all artillery until a hole is broken
Unless Infernius and Tracy's faggots can learn to calm the fuck down and wait until we actually have the ability to turn undead and the like again the next day
Kek. Some of these Ebin Spells are funny.
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Mass_Frog>>39862And once that spot is open, enter through boat or fly in
>>39859Not really. Its not connected to anything so all it would do is wobble. The wobbling does betray that - like Trump tower - its double-sided; meaning its not actually a pyramid, but an octahedron.
[1d20 = 4]>>39865is there any opening on it?
>>39863>range: 300 ft>Duration: permanent>>39865Is there any guess of what kind of material it could be?
>>39866No.
>>39867e.e
How many times are you going to make me say "not unlike Trump tower"?
>>39868"cant you go inside tracy?"
>>39869Dimension lock works both ways
>>39869"Nope."
>>39868I never really determined what the Trump tower was made of either.
>>39871Tracy doesn't know that.
>>39868Trumpaladin orders a contingent of men to the Jolly Cunt, and returns to the Tower on Fae.
Looking for Darkie
>>39872Its glassteel
>>39873He's not hiding; in future "Goes and finds Darkie" will be fine
>>39868since its floating can it be moved?
>>39874Excellent. Ask him
"If you wanted to break into this tower, how would you do it?"
>>39875>>39876Cuz its not gi-fucking-gantic and shit
>>39877"I'd have to think about that. When I first um,... visited to um,... pick up a bit, it was easy. Since I'm already a player I can readily come and go at will, even with fields in place. I just went chameleon and walked right in."
>>39879"I'm going to submit to you a challenge. I don't quite have a payment, except, you know, for that unicorn horn, but I hope you'll appreciate it. Suppose you're not a player. And suppose a dimension lock is in place. You can lift or disable the dimension lock, but the subject will teleport away if disabled for long enough. Tell me, how would you get in to this tower?"
>>39879if we tie a rope around it and pull it with trump tower will it move?
>>39878>>39877>>39875We could also just get on its surface, undo the dimension lock, and then slip in before it teleports. Or teleport with it
>>39879"hey thez. do you know how to get inside tower?"
>>39881>>39878Actually I still want to shoot at it with cannons. 12 cannons firing every minute for two hours.
>>39881It'd be a pain to tie around.
Use sovereign duct tape to attach the cables.
>>39884Do we have any adamantine?
>>39880"Why don't you just ask me to try and figure out how to get in the pyramid over there? Its not like I didn't notice it when I was picking up the horn."
>>39881e_6
>>39883Thez is in the port, helping clean up the mess that she still blames herself for.
>>39886How much are you talking?
>>39886Adamantine was explicitly stated as being among the metals in the treasury
>>39879To Darkie
"Second question for you. If any particular spot on the tower were shot at with cannon balls and trebuchets enough times - and I mean literal hundreds of shots over hours - would it eventually break?"
>>39889"That's pretty much my question"
Tracy needs to fix her relationship with her husbando anyways
>>39891"I'll see what I can come up with. As far as cannons, you might want to ask the midgit, he's the resident expert on this place."
>>39892>expensive fuggin' cannonballsNot enough for more than a few shots.
>>39893"No... sorry."
>>39895"Are you referring to the dragon who has been missing for many days, or the dwarf who tried to kill us and is now dead?"
I g2g soon.
Tracy appears visibly frustrated, again, and wanders off into town in stealth, looking for any traces of troll as she scavenges dropped items/weapons, loots broken shops, collects body parts, and finishes off the rest of the wandering undead.
>>39897"I mean the little shit with a penchant for setting things on fire."
>>39896"... thanks. There's two things I need your help with actually."
>>39898The shops are essentially undamaged, as the evacuation was well under way when the Devos invaded
>>39899"Thank you"
Whelp. Trumpaladin goes to the forge to see if Lenos ever came back
>I will never have a lover as devoted as Infernius - ever\r
>>39900She leads him over to the whorehouse, where all the undead corpses are being piled around.
"When the clean-up is finished, we're going to burn it all. When that is finished, I want you to sanctify the place," she looks down, "so that nothing like this ever happens again."
>>39904"me know you still blame yourself, but me don't blame you thez. you didn't know."
May as well continue talking with Felicia, if she hasn't wondered off and hasn't been killed by Darkie
"I see your cutie mark is of a paint brush. Were you a painter?"
>>39903>Trumpaladin will never have a lover as devoted to him as Infernius to ThezTrumpaladin tries to think of ways to steal Thez's Husbando
>>39906"No, but I should have. I was careless. If not for that weakness, we could have easily routed them with no casualties. I didn't intend for this to happen, but the blood is on my hands. Gawd, look at me. What's happened to me? I used to be affable and detached, unemotional and carefree. Now I'm getting all weepy over a bunch of whores and ex-convicts. This is your fault you know," she says, managing a weak smile.
>>39907"I absolutely love to paint! I have,... er had, a whole art gallery featuring works by many of the local Phillydelphia artists, myself included. I wonder what will happen to it now."
>>39910"I'm... I'm sorry. I too left things and people behind"
*Attempts to hug pony*
>>39910Good. Good. Join the light side
>>39901Tracy gives up and goes back to the tower.
It's like ~3:00 AM, right?
>>39910*hugs*
"me plan all coming together *smiles* it okay baby, me think you look cute when flustered like this. we will make (((them))) pay thez"
>>39914I hope it's before midnight. I kind of want to craft Mithral Armor for Fae before the Tower is cracked
>>39913>'I couldn't find her...'>>39916There's no way it's before midnight. And hoo-mans need sleep.
>>39917I'm hoping RBG was killed before sunset and the rest of this autistic mess didn't take more than six hours. But yes, he's going to sleep eventually
*starts removing heavy plate*
>>39917>"Tracy... do you... really appreciate what did on the docks..." >>39912Accepts hug
>light sideIts alot easier since she's not half-devil
>>39914More like 5 I think, a few hours before dawn yet.
>>39916Unless you mean new years, why midnight?
>>39915Her expression hardens. "Oh, I'm gonna call in a favor for this one."
>>39921>why midnightJust to save time. Any time will do, but earlier is better
>Felicia accepts the hug"I can understand if you don't want to stay here, but, well, I'm not sure where else you would go. Would you like stay here, at the tower? We have extra rooms, food and drink we can give you"
>>39920>"I'm a little angry with you..." >>39924"The only entity that I know of that loves the destruction of anyone and anything, virtually indescriminately. Spooder."
>>39925If Trumpaladin were there, he'd try to talk her out of taking such a giant risk and insist that the party's resources, many of which have never even been used, are sufficient for the task
Instead, Trumpaladin helps the new cute girl into her room while thinking about how he's angry at his girlfriend
>>39926"Not him, I'm talking about Lloth, the one who put Darkemter here. Most players don't know the deities who brought them here, but Darkie knows all too well, and his armor is somehow connected to her."
>>39927And if Trump were there and said that, she would assure him that she doesn't want her help defeating (((them))), she wants her to make sure that they end up in Spooder's level of the Abyss for all eternity.
>>39928"thez me don't want you to make deals with devils"
*sad Minoutaur face*
>>39929"Not a devil, a demon-god. And don't worry, she owes me. I did her a favor once a long time ago."
>>39928A deal not to destroy the enemy, but to drag their souls further into hell? I guess that can be made safely and have beneficial effects the Party and the City cannot replicate
[1d20+30 = 42]>>39930Does Felicia have any wants at the moment? Sense motive on pony
>>39933+30? Rly? Damn. That's some Jedi-level shit
>>39933Aaaaaaand Sense motive is a wisdom based check, not Charisma, so the Circlet of Persuasion can't apply. So maybe +27 ish.
>>39934I'm not sure, but 19 ranks in sense motive, +2 negotiator feat, +2 natural wisdom, +1 or +2 from the Periphet of wisdom, +1 Stone of Good Luck. So actually only +25 or +26. The diplomacy modifier though is Jedi Level
>>39935That's still fukkin absurd.
says the guy who's character has a +33 on hide and sneakAlright. She's clearly a bit taken aback by the situation, not least of which because the guy who attacked her when she first showed up is now the guy catering to her and giving her the rundown. Additionally, she's seen more off-the-wall shit (the tower, the Entertron, various other things) in her first day here than in most of her entire lifetime in Equestria. She's further dismayed at the thought of never seeing her friends and loved ones again, and to top it all off she doesn't have any paint/brushes.
"Uhm,... where can I find paintbrushes and paint? It helps me to relax."
>>39937*cleans up and piles bodies*
>>39938"Leave that part to me, I can teleport. Your men are in mourning, and could use a morale boost," she smiles hopefully. "They look up to you, and not just cuz you're fuggin' tall."