Its that RP thread again! Spectators can shitpost, new players can try it out with little/no investment, and established players need no explanation.
We return as most of the party is either in Sparintenar preparing for a swank banquet - a custom among the Spartans - or speeding towards; except Thez. ;_;
Our newest player Stix is exploring the surrounding forest area, as is his proclivity as a ranger.
Tracy, speeds toward Sparintenar at full speed for some reason unknown to GM at time of OP.
Thez is at the Sticky Wickett, having brought Bones along to have a mostly one-sided conversation, accented occasionally by >doot
Game is temporally not set to fire off at a particular point, but last thread passed 2nd bump so,....
1264 replies and 101 files omitted.
Tracy lets out a bored sigh, secretly hoping shit will break loose so she can stab shit.
>>55710Whatever happened there, it wasn't discreet...
*licks ear*
>>55711"If you're really bored little pony, we can kill time by checking out the beds"
>>55713"I think the tree rat is about to say something..." Tracy says, bored
Alright. So when I last had consciousness over the game, Baz had entered the scene. Its actually good that I did fade out, cuz I would have otherwise totally botched the scene. I'm going to resume play with his entrance, as it will specify and designate that Infernius does/did not have sufficient position/opportunity to "bite the squirrel", outside of deliberately maneuvering toward if that is his desire.
>>55718Give it a minute, I'm not sure everyone is in thread atm
>>55715Trumpaladin stands, claps, and above all, grins
Okay, he only stands or claps if other people are doing it (at least standing I think is traditional in western cultures) but he grins regardless
>>55721Yes, I'll go full cinema. It'll be that sort of scenario.
For the moment
https://youtu.be/7bzG8JQn-pIAs always, best at 1.25 speed
>>55722Now why didn't I ask this before? Before baz enters (because he probably needs to keep his eyes on Baz. or is that disreapectful? Never can tell with foriegn cultures) Trumpaladin takes a moment to note
which minister are in the room (defense, entertainment and so forth) seeing as he has met many of them and he wants to figure out what kind of banquet Sparintenar thought this was, and who they thought needed to be there or could be spared for it
>>55724Its a full reception banquet, similar to the previous one. Being militaristic, there is a certain public ceremony to their foreign relations.
What I mean by that is that there is a good 300 people in attendance, mostly in group formations by table areas. There is a raised podium area - only slightly raised - where are seated the various ministers and Baz himself, but Baz hasn't taken his seat yet.
>>55725Where is the Minister of entertainment?
>>55727Likewise on the raised table area. He in particular is looking to the party with visible anxiety, presumably because Taylor Swift did not make her arranged performance and has not been heard from. Court City was furious she did not appear for their celebration.
>>55728TayTay is probably out conquering the rest of the galaxy.
>>55728>The court city is having a celebrationThis I must hear more about
>>55730Any sign of Infernius?
>>55731The celebration is already passed, but Trump is welcome to inquire further.
>>55732Well, Trumpaladin tries to approach the people of importance, saying he has an urgent message for Renquist and for Baz that is best told personally
>>55732i meant the table with the ministers.
How far away is their table?
>>55733We'll get started in a minute, I'm holding out to see if Infernius shows up, since he wanted to bite Baz
>>55732Oh wait, we're still waiting for Baz to arrive. I mis interpreted that
>>55734Its sorta close I guess, as the party would be displayed prominantly and presently front and center.
>>55737And everyone is sitting? Are people sitting with one another?
>>55738Relatively, I mean I hadn't mapped it out expecting combat
>>55738*speaking with one another
I'm not at my best today...
>>55743You just showed up! Let me dramatize for a moment! e\\_/e
>ahemBaz enters the chamber to the sort of reception would expect of a military group who totally loves and appreciates its leader He pauses at the entrance and visibly sighs. Holding up a tiny squirrel paw, he waves the group to silence. He slowly walks up to the party, flanked and followed by senior officers.
>>55743So he's the one guy standing up in the room to approach the VIP while everyone else is sitting?
>>55745>>55744*Roman salutes* the squirrel.
>>55748He shifts his bazooka to his other hand, and returns the salute.
>>55748*cries tear, and gives a restrained salute to both Infernius and Baz*
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKhTk0IynHM >>55750>>55744>Baz enters the chamber to the sort of reception would expect of a military group who totally loves and appreciates its leader Infernuis knows baz isnt food now.
>>55750Sensing the significance of the moment, the whole room slowly, gradually, all stand and give the salute. No one says anything, no one makes an outward statement or indication, but everyone notices that one of the spartans has not returned, and those who have are deferring to Trump and co, as having determinate facts and details.
"Gentleman, and feisty lady (he says of/to Tracy). Let us dispense with pleasantries for a moment. Where is our man?"
>>55752[inaudible feisty pony noises]
"For him to be absent, and for there to be such a reception to inquiry can only suggest one thing. A Spartan does not just 'not show up'. His comrades do not say 'Ask the commanding officer' arbitrarily," he continues.
>>55752>>55755"You have missing man? Infernuis will help you find him."
One of the spartans got devourered
>>55752>>55755Trumpaladin stands
"Mr. Baz, I am sorry to report to you that a few days ago, Port Barry was attacked by a massive horde of Undead. This was evidently in retaliation for damage caused in an infiltration of the Court city when a member of our party was kidnapped and we sought to retrieve them. The Undead attacked in masses with zombies and giants lead by three lichs. However, a group of devourers entered through the Ethereal plane through a weak point in the center of the city
Your spartans showed precisely the initiative, courage, and aptitude in battle that IK would expect of a Spartan. They took up arms against the court city oppressors. And they held the line. They along with our Generals, Ghestapo, and Fight club slew many devourers and kept the city safe. But this came at a price. Several men of every faction did not merely perish, but gave mind, body and soul to in the fight, most especially Fight Club, but including Spartans. They are.... No more. But please do be assured, they demonstrated all excellence in fighting the undead and protecting the citizenry. For no man can ever truly die so long as his comrades live on to commemorate their deeds.
The Lichs and undead were repelled from the city with the help of your Spartans"
Trumpaladin looks down mournfully at appropriate moments
>>55756Now would be a good time to redpill them on liberal jews.
>>55762I hadn't considered this angle, but this angle
>>55761"I had expected no less. A Spartan only 'doesn't come home' when doing so would amount to cowardice, inaction, and a lack of honor. I am pleased to hear that these men of mine, of
ours, paid a noble sacrifice on behalf of innocents and in the face of terrible forces. I am grateful even. "To bear that which you do not believe you can bear, to spare others that same fate. To hone your mind, body, and spirit, so that they may be expended on behalf of our good people. That is what it means to be a Spartan." he says solemnly, which is responded to by a single, coordinated, and deafeningly-percussive "Huuuuah!" by the entirety of the surrounding room.
"There. Now that that's settled, let us enjoy ourselves a bit. I welcome any news, information, and ideas you may have."
>>55764Well, all 3 liches were jews
>>55765"Commander squirrel, have you heard of jews?"
>>55764For example.
>>55766This.
Most of the liches were left-leaning politicians. Tell them about the kikery in left-leaning organizations.
Infernius has the Knowledge Religion ranks to explain everything to them.
>>55765"Huuah indeed! My I approach to discuss details going forward. Strategic details"
>>55765Can Tracy speak with the minister of entertainment?
>>55769He's right there, its not 'approach' at this point.
Baz waves to some of his senior detail, who dispense with orderly directing the assembled soldiery to gather foods and noms. He remains motionless and beckons Trump to continue.
[1d20+20 = 26]>>55771I go talk to some of his honor guards about lich kikes and the jewish question.
>>55771Trumpaladin says this more silently, because he wants only Baz and maybe esential personnel near him to hear
"When the court city sent out an octohedron we penetrated it and withdrew. They destroyed it. But when it exploded.... we heard a laugh. An unmistakable, maniacal laugh. Kefka is back. I guess they have True Resurrection just as surely as we do"
>>55772You're not going to talk to him? Sorry, I neglected to mention he doesn't know the work "Jews", but I'm sure there are some defining characteristics he might appreciate and have experienced, given that (((rats))) are purveysive and Sparintenar doesn't toerate shenanigens.
>>55773"INDEED!"
The entire scene is pierced by Kefka's unmistakeable cackle.
https://youtu.be/koSnyw209gg >>55773"If Kefka was an ebin spellcaster, then he could have just used Eidolon to duplicate himself.
We could face two or even three Kefkas next time."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gamV209yG48 >>55776Idk why I said that in character...
>>55774I thought he wanted to talk to trump.
>>55775"Hitler banishes you kikeka!"
>>55778Not exclusively, and he wouldn't object if he interjected, especially since he hasn't met Infernius (or Torcuil).
[1d20+24 = 36]>>55776>>55775>mfw I gave Kefka an ideaTracy activates her Ring of Spell Turning.
Rolling to Hide
I g2g for 5-10 mins
>>55775*concern*
>>55776"Where the fuck did you learn so much about whatever the hell you are talking about from?"
>>55780"Commander squirrel, me am Infernuis Sheriff of port barry. And me know the true force behind all evil of this world"
>>55783Everyone listening stops, including Kefka, who has materialized in a reclining position in midair above the party, with a puzzled expression on his face.
>>55782How does he know what True Resurrection is?
>'I read it in a library book: The Ebin Handbook.' >>55785Yeah keep the bullshit to yourself thank you
>>55784*casts miracle to kill kefka*
>>55787Tell us about the Jews first. That's more important.
>>55787By that description, you're using Miracle to duplicate a spell. Please choose the spell in question.
>>55789Also, as far as 9th-level Cleric spells go, Implosion is a better shot if you're just looking to kill something.
[1d20+35 = 51]>>55791Trumpaldin tries to convince Kefka that through the party's normal behavior (and Sparintenar's), he is furthering Kefka's philosophy of finding meaning through destruction
"Face the might of the wunderwaffe! Hahahaha!"
"You see Mr. Kefka? He's your splitting image. Maybe a bit less... able, but he understands"
>>55798Not even close. Kefka erupts in laughter at the attempt. "Oh please, I was most intrigued by what you were saying."
>>55798You can use it for up to 4 rounds.
>>55798Every fucking time reeeeeeee
>>55799"Oh? You expect me to believe that?"
>>55803He'd be jelly if he knew there were people in his court that were more ebil than him.
His reputation is at stake.
>>55803"Oh why so dour? I heard there was a feast of sorts," he looks to Baz. "You don't mind if I crash do you? I don't even require a seat!" he says, sitting in midair, but rotating along an axis that maintains facing everyone.
>>55806"I heard there was a celebration recently"
Trumpaladin is shaking , but he picks up a piece of bread and eats it
[1d20+21 = 34]
Rolling to Move Silently.
>>55807Baz is in a ready-stance, but he's not moving.
>>55808"Oh yes, that. I had hoped to lure one of you out to a trap and do horrible things to them. A pity,...." he laments.
"Well i expect some of these (((people))) have infiltrated your court."
>>55809Tracy leaves the building while everyone is distracted staring at the cosplaying freak.
>>55810"Ha me knew that pyramid was no good! Me am too smart for you kefka."
>>55811All seem interested in Infernius continuing.
>>55810"So why are so many of your rivals for power in the Court City undead? Is that the whole regime?"
>>55812>move silently =/= hidingTracy very silently, but also rather obviously, exits the scene.
>>55815"Well everyone else DIES! No one is powerful enough! No one knows the order of chaos like the undead," he laughs.
>>55814(((They))) sifen off your gold and send it to their land. And not just the court city but presumably spartania as well.
>>55816See
>>55781She hid under the tables right before he materialized.
>>55817"Do you know who these airship riding pirates are?"
>>55816Tracy decks it for the mountains.
And she brings Sparkle.
>>55821"Pirates? I don't know of pirates being a nuisance. Your game must be weak!" he rofls in midair.
>>55820Oh fine, no one notices Tracy leave
>>55819Very
>>55818"Oh? I'm curious to hear more of this."
>>55823"So you don't even know who these people flying around in expensive luxury airships pillaging your lands are? I though you liked to exact tribute?"
>>55822*runs off at safe distance towards the mountains*
>>55825"Oh please, my empire doesn't cover the
whole planet, that'd be too much to fuss over!"
>>55828"Come again? I was expecting more"
>>55829Kefka is pretty whitepilled.
He might have the power to take over or destroy most things, but he wouldn't take more than he could without having to stress over trying to actually rule, because that'd just be a bother.
>>55830He always seemed more interested in destroying things than actually ruling them.
>>55828"Kefka let me ask you about your relationship with the (((rats)))"
>>55829"Too much to fuss over? Who is fussing with you?"
Tracy returns to the mountain trail.
>>55829"More? You think
I'm the only supremely powerful interest in the world?"
>>55832"I don't care for rats. Bottom-feeders and agents of attrition. I prefer direct and exciting chaos to slow degeneracy."
>>55834And she can do that in a few hours. Because she just fucking left Sparintenar
>>55835"Well I know you aren't, I saw several other powerful interests myself. Who Are they?"
>>55834She goes to where she last saw that herd.
>>55835Trumpaladin sits down in a seat, sighs, and looks at Kefka. "Who are these assholes?"
>>55835"Look me gonna be straight forward kefka, me respect you will to action me feel like we could be friends or at least allies.but why you so evil?
What if me told you they're agents in your court working for they're own goals?
>>55838"Oh yes, I come to one of your parties, and you assume I'm just going to cough up information."
>>55839"And what if ME told you that I don't really care? They do what I tell them cuz otherwise smite! And I do prefer smiting those who put up a fight,...." he says with a sinister grin.
*continues towards the mountains*
"I wonder if Stix got eaten yet..." she ponders to herself.
>>55840Trumpaladin extends the bread basket to Kefka
"But when you leave the room, they scheme against you, don't they?"
>>55842He waves his hand absently. "They scheme, what of it?"
>>55840"You are fool you cosplaying faggot! you know nothing of the sneakiness of these usury of these filthy parasitic kikes!"
>>55841Meanwhile, Stix wonders why this tree is so fascinating...
>>55843"I know the feeling. I know what it's like for your allies to abandon you right at the time you need them the most"
Trumpaladin looks around
"Where the hell is Tracy? Did she seriously just leave us for dead?! Anyways, i know what it is like to be schemed against, and betrayed. They are friendly, even helpful for so long. They wait for a moment when you are weak. Only when you are experiencing your worst do they strike. They kick you when you are down. I know the anxiety"
I wonder what kind of uber-spells Kefka prefers.
He sounds like the type to enjoy big, flashy evocations, like Hellball or Animus Blizzard.
>>55846Tracy's only other in-character response would've been to stab. It's better that she left.
>>55848She was his only getaway option
>>55849Wrong. we still have uatchit.
>>55846Kefka yawns obvious. "Bo-ring, I had ho"I ped there would me more excitement. Perhaps cake. Alas. Too-da-loo!" and with that, his form spins amongst its self inwardly, and then vanishes.
*hoped there
Idk what happened
>>55852Inwardly, only to himself, Trumpaladin says "CRITICAL HIT." He looks over for Baz and for Infernius
>>55856>>55857"Unbelieveable! You see that people he doesnt care about his court or anyone unfortunate enough to be there! He Doesnt want to hear about the courruption that follows these agents of filth and darkness everywhere they go! And me have feeling theyre some in your fine city!"
>>55859Hes yelling this to the room.
>>55862"He's only weak when compared to the foes he faces. That most dangerous foe of all. The one that will more surely bring ruin to you and your nation than any foreigner. The enemy within"
>>55861Kefka's too nihilistic and crazy to be afraid of anything. He's one of those "we all die someday" kind of faggots.
>>55864My character assumes that Kefka is motivated in the way he would be motivated were he in Kefka's position? Is that the right way to look at it? probably not. But it's a reasonable enough explaination for why Kefka was so fascinated by the story of jews and why he didn't kill them or why he left at that point in the conversation. So basically that's my character's interpretation and I'm sticking to it until the facts change
>>55863"Me guess,but me really wanted to gain a ally."
>>55866"For a moment I thought he might ask for help"
>>55864This, though I'm not entirely certain where the discussion is going atm
>>55865I cannot edit out the question mark at the end of that first sentence
reeeeeee >>55868Exactly. He's the purest form of CE. No regard for anything; destroys entire worlds on whim alone.
>>55867"Me was trying to help him."
>>55871"He's concerned. There is no way he gets along with every one he s associated with. And he must have many enemies of he can't even tell us who the air pirates are. I think he let us live because he needs us. he needs us to save him from his enemies,
and his friends"
>>55872Democucks are cowards. They may be using their association for power, but they wouldn't defy him.
Even if they did, it'd just be an excuse to destroy everything.
>>55873A void of emptiness could be considered a monument.
>>55870If any of that were in character, Trumpaladin would respond. "Pfft! then why would he claim the title of emperor if he did not want to rule? Why would he take tribute if he only wanted to destroy?" But Trumpaladin can't respond, because none of that is in character. So stop metagaming and let Infernius and I discuss a character
>>55874The traitor waits for a moment you are weak to strike
>>55875Then you would have to destroy the stuff around it to truly destroy everything as stated, thus making it ever expanding until the monument is all encompassing and thus not a set apart place of memorial, but simply the norm.
>>55872"That sound like reasonable theory, but me think we need to put pressure on him to make him crack so we can see the kikes in the court."
>>55876>emperorBecause he'd biggest and baddest.
>tributeTo pay for his makeup expenses.
Tracy looks for the cows.
>>55879Stop metagaming. If you want tracy to participate, then make her participate
>>55878"How do we put pressure on him? How do we find him? How did we summon him just now even?"
>>55881"He probably has spell on us."
>>55881Not intending for it to be consequential. Just saying that Kefka's a batshit clown who doesn't care about anything but blowing shit up, not even himself.
>>55882THAT is something to be concerned about.
>>55885>metagaming this hardIf you wanted your character to be there you shouldn't have left
>>55886"Infernius... What happened to you while you were in the Court City?"
>>55888
>kills merchant
>those digits
Heil!
>>55889"Well... What do you think he wants?"
>>55893"Why do you think he appeared to us just now? Surely to scare us, but there must be more to it than that"
>>55895"Well to try and scare us maybe."
>>55897"He was very interested in your talk of jews"
>>55900"He just flat out told us he isn't the only strong guy here. But we know now he doesn't rule the planet"
>>55894Yeah, sorry, I've got meatspace as well as gamestuff.
>>55902Will Tracy be able to find those ogres again tonight?
>>55888
>>55892
>>55899
Kills 3 merchants
>>55905Please stop trying to provoke fights. We fight enough
>>55906I can kill merchants whenever I want, kike-enabler.
I refuse to bow to censorship.
>>55907You made that post earlier very specifically to provoke and dare me, and no other reason
>>55908I can kill a merchant
whenever I want, faggot.
If you can't tolerate that, that's
your problem.
*kills 72 merchants*
>>55910You're doing it deliberately to start a fight, and that is a problem
>>55911The problem is you thinking you can delet comments, that don't break any rules, at your own discretion, faggot.
It's a fantasy game: I can do whatever I want, and I won't be restricted by your feelings.
>>55912No, you did it specifically to provoke
>>55914
lol
kills 6 gorillion merchants