/vx/ - Mass Transit Nuts

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Well how about that,... air pirates. And they call their ship a derivative of "Cunt" too. I wonder if there's a connection, GM says dryly.
This leg of the game has the players either onboard or somewhere in the vicinity of the 'random' pirate airship that has taken to firing upon Trump Tower, as well as several of the characters. Unfortunately, a spell-caster onboard has placed a spell of Peace on the ship, and now there's a shimmering wall of force surrounding the captain.
Thez is hovering about 45deg from the front, ready to attack. Lenos is preparing for a Meteor Swarm, Infernius is speeding toward the ship, and Torcuil said "Fuck the Bullshit" and just teleported to it.
Trump wants to engage in diplomacy, but he rolled a 1 so he has to wait, and Tracy can't stab at ALL, which is an entirely new sensation for her.

>>42551
It doesn't say that on the page though.
It only asks for Opportunist and Crippling Strike class features, along with +8d6 Sneak Attack damage.
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Lingering_Damage
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Sneak_Attack_of_Opportunity

>>42555
You don't see the [EPIC] next to the feat name?

>>42552
>inb4 unable to change back

>>42557
>Inb4 he doesn't care so long as Thez can carry him around

>>42554
"t-t-t-thez *burp* me a shit meme thez, shove me in y-y-you *burp*"

>>42556
Does that imply that you can't select it until you have 20 levels? There are other feats that require minimum class levels, but these don't.

What about the holodeck? I don't see any restrictions for acquiring feats through other means.

>>42561
I asked for an epic feat back when we were first selecting feats, GM said no epic feats for non-epic characters, and if I have to wait for ebin feats, so do you

>>42563
Alright then. I guess I'll just have to wait until lvl 20.
Let me look at the list again..

>>42562
What page did you pull that Devoted to A Cause feat from?

I should have asked for this feat. Hell yes
http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/Half-Celestial_Mount_(3.5e_Feat)

>>42548
[(# o dice)d(# o sides)]

So the party has a handy new airship, which is much faster and more maneuverable than the Tower. It also has fixed cannons that were able to dent the Tower. Lenos, and now Thez are 'examining' the bar, aside from a couple-dozen pirates lining the deck and somehow Infernius turning himself into a pickle, nothing but the sound of the wind and the rhythm of the ships mechanisms running is immediate.

>>42572
You said it was operated by hand crank. Was it operated by a single hand crank, or is each cannon separately operated?

Has anyone figured out the basic controls on the thing yet?

>>42571
My opinion?
You need to have a very high IQ to understand....
>>42572
>no sound
"FUCK ZIGGERS"
Anyway, to begins to poke and prod around the ship

>>42573
Can Torc be pilot?

>>42573
Each one
>>42574
>>42575
Spellcraft check

>>42572
"thez no alcohol!"

>>42577
"Says the pickle," Xp

>>42575
So long as 1. you don't crash it 2. I can adorn it with my Generals as archery support, then sure

>>42576
Tell Fae to bring a Spartan up to the ship, and ask him what the hell this thing is
\r

>>42578
"reeeeee it will deform the baby!"

>>42580
This. Also, alcohol is degenerate

[1d20+5 = 6]
>>42576
Uh, I'm assuming int gives a bonus.
So, bonus is +2 (Arcana knowledge) +3 int
What are feats btw?

>>42583
>1
I'm gonna go kill myself now

>>42570
in the email field or what

>>42586
Just type it
EG
[1d20 = 19]

[1d1000 = 637]

[5d6 = 15]

>>42582
"Hiss!"

Well, yes. Typical of homebrew feats, they function more like multiple ex's or sp's than a normal feat. But they look very easy to split into smaller parts, so that you can get some of the benefits while some are nerfed. I also think "Architype" feats are different than general feats in how they are acquired, but I really don't know and can't say how

>>42587
Oh now I get a good fucking d20 roll
Fuck off script

[(1 dice)d(20 o sides)]

>>42588
She qualifies for the listed prereqs, and I think they match her meme-thematics.

>>42590
>>42592
>>42593
Just fyi, if you want to test things, there's also a hidden board for it:
>>>/test/

>>42591
I'm not sure, but I think an archetype feat is added on almost like a template on top of the character, rather than an acquired skill

>>42582
>archetype feats
>homebrew

>>42594
Thanks for the link, for some reason I can never get there

>>42596
I guess that means no then.

>>42583
Feats are learned skills or abilities that don't fit with basic skills. Think of them as technique(s) that the player learns to accommodate their existing abilities.
>>42598
Cuz you need more hacks?

>>42599
How do I aquire?

>>42599
>>42596
How do archetypes work anyway? I was just poking around the page that last link was from.

>>42601
You pick them. You already get like, 8 (1 + /3levels) and probably a bonus one or two. As role-playing tools they're really handy, or just as modifiers they work too.

>>42603
>I get 8
Holy fuck
How many skills can I pick to be maxxed with my skill points?

>>42604
>>42599
I noticed that it was overlooked that Torcuil and Trumpaladin are eligible for an additional feat as a racial quality of being human. Can Trumpaladin select Weapon Focus for use of Vanderiem or does that feat need to go towards "weapon proficiency, bastard sword

>>42603
>>42604
Actually, the number of feats at 17th level is 6, +1 for humans

>>42603
"Thez can you pick me up? it dirty down here."

By the way, lest I forget, I did want to give shit to Infernius and Torcuil, who's faggots couldn't contain themselves from cross-threading in the 4cc thread, and especially Torcuil for thinking this was the first trophy Mlpol has gotten Xp

>>42604
You can only have as many ranks in a skill as you have levels for Class skills, and you can only have half as many in cross-class skills

>>42606
"I can't believe we're having this conversation," she laments before slapping him down on the bar.
"Why are you a pickle?"

>>42607
torc called me out.

>>42610
Oh I was facepalming the entire time

>>42607
Hey, he fucking started it. And I hadn't paid attention to the cups so go drive off a cliff. But not really
>>42608
English please?

>>42608
The number of ranks you can have in a skill is equal to the class level plus 3 for class skills
http://www.ign.com/wikis/dungeons-and-dragons/Level_and_XP_progression

>>42609
"because me can mort.....thez."
>>42611
blame him

>>42612
Torcuil is now 17th level. He can have up to 17 in any class-related skill or 8 in any non-class skill.
>>42614
"And how do you plan to not be a pickle, given that we don't even know what is on this ship? How did you become a pickle in the first place?"
Thez sighs and places Infernius in her drink, intent on continuing the discussion as she wanders about the ship, venturing below-deck to check it out.

>>42614
He's Animal Domain, Right?
Doesn't he get Shapechange at this level?

>>42614
You thez posted first
>>42616
>17 in some 8 in the others
Thanks
>pickle
This is weird

>>42617
>Me unironically trying to make sense of this
Don't mind me, I've been a huge autist all day today..

Can Tracy ransack the bodies/ship?

>>42617
ding ding ding.
"me have new power"

>>42618
someone said post waifu for power.

>>42620
It looks pretty high class
Tracy looks around for anything worth taking.

>>42621
>>42622
I missed the waifu bit

>>42621
"Ooh! Ooh! Ooh! Turn me into a horse or pony!"

>>42622
Well, I guess its better for me to be slightly autistic and get it out on the web than with people I know irl. Now can we shut up about it?
>>42625
I swear we get fucking weirder every bred
>>42627
Lewd

>>42621
"And that's what you went with?"

>>42622
>post waifu for power
Posting waifus

>>42627
*touches Infernius's Pickle*

>>42630
"me thought it would be funny."
>>42628
yea we can.
>>42631

>>42632
"klattu verata nikto"
*you are now flash sentry*

>>42628
Alright, so aside from completely failing his initial attempts to understand the controls, Torcuil finds that the controls are quite simple. The ship can steer in any direction off of forward, but can't upset its gyroscopic position (down is always down). It can go forward and a minimal, medial, and nominal pace, has "poor" (per gaming terms) maneuverability, and was designed with idiots in mind (meaning, minimal user input).

>>42634
"MY POWER GROWS!"

*Finds Tracy*

>>42634
Shapechange is personal only, u cant change others

>>42638
>oh rip
>>42637
torc has to change you

>>42638
>>42639
But Animal Shape is

>has idea
Thez also goes to Tracy, still carrying beverage Infernius.
"Do you still have the skull-shaped bottle?" Eyes beaming mischievously.

>>42641
Fair point, though that means Trump can't be a pickle.

>>42643
"You shush, this was your idea anyway." :3

>>42644
*Sad Waifu Thief noises*

>>42642
I don't think it was actually crafted, just discussed

>>42646
The skull-shaped bottle is one of the ones that Thez gave Tracy some time ago. It made a cameo during the Terrasque fight. Thez has Tracy hold onto it cuz she thinks that Tracy will do something with it at some point, but in the meantime its an excuse to bug her.

[1d20 = 4]
>>42647
Oh. Was that the bottle of air? Also, when stealing waifus, what modifier do I apply? Diplomacy? Grapple modifiers?

Where is Tracy's faggot? Oh well. Rolling to steal Tracy

>>42648
That looks like a shitty roll, but it's a 38 if diplomacy is applied, and a 26 if grapple modifiers are applied. I am an expert waifu thief

>>42635
I actually understand something for once, does it have an intercom system?
>>42639
Polymorph time?

>>42648
There's no skill for seduction (there REALLY should be) so I would add the modifiers of Sense Motive with Diplomacy and divide that by 2, applied against a DC for the pony being seduced
>>42650
Sure

For example, Scootaloo would be DC5 j/k but not by much

>>42652
what about lyra?

[1d20+30 = 31]
>>42651
>The only two skills I put anything into
+30 on the seduction modifier then

Rolling to seduce the nearest pony, which really out to be Tracy

>>42654
>I rolled a 1
I managed to fuck up seducing Tracy

>>42655
>dick caught in vaccum cleaner.

>>42653
>has hands
-5
>>42654
I check every time that happens to make sure it wasn't a script error.
The way I'm gonna play this one is, having just recently engaged in a frivolous sexing in front of the pirates, Trump is still off his game a tad and comically misses one of his lines.

>>42657
>tfw pickle.

>>42651
*intercom noises*
"This is your captain speaking, I would like you to know I'm going to try flying this fucking thing.
Uh, please fasten your seatbelts and hold on to your valuables"
Torc tries to pilot the ship towards the bay

>>42658
>no hands, my bad
Still a 0
>>42659
May the dice be with you.

>>42657
*Blue balled waifu thief noises*

>>42660
What do I roll?

>>42651
So... what are the DCs of the various ponies?

There's a classic ship-wheel, except steering-wheel size attached to what looks like a podium. There's a lever on the middle-right and a smaller one above it. a number of buttons and switches adorn the console.

I should mention, the ship its self is levelled at about 1000 feet, which is relatively clear of any potential landmarks

>>42664
Do the buttons and switches have labels?
And what position are the levers at?
>>42665
I will not touch altitude controll then

[1d20 = 11]
>>42664
>>42665
rolling for torc.

>>42665
>There are no buildings over 1000 feet tall, so nothing to worry about crashing into
Nice to know

>>42667
I don't need your rolls
>>42669
Kek

>>42666
>doesn't want to get blown up
Okay, fine. After a few rounds of daintily messing with the conrols, Torcuil figures out that the upper right is altitude, and the middle right is throttle. He's not particularly skilled, but he can be said to get an idea of how to guide the ship. No, there are no labels on the buttons and switches.

Sorry I had to step out...

>>42636
*pregnancy cravings intensify*

>>42642
"Here you go."
*gives bottle*

>>42674
>>42675
"look at me, me a pickle!"

>>42671
>No labels
I'll let Lenos look at those later.
Uh, mid level throttle, steer towards the bay. Drop to low throttle half way. Then cut gas flip around and thrust until stopped when at the bay

>>42676
*drools a little bit*
Fyi, if he didn't already belong to Thez, she may've just eaten him. She's like a cat in that regard.
"Do they have any food left in the chambers? Something acidic?"
>>42679
>that ridiculous modifier
>still 1 anyway
Wtf am I supposed to make of that?

>>42680
There's about 1/2 a boar
Still a fail btw

>>42680
dont worry ill escape to the sewers.

>>42681
>Still a fail
I know, I'm just having a hard time figuring out how to respond to it..

>>42682
"You, get big again," she says, waving one hand about in reference to making magic work.

>>42681
*steps over bodies*
*tears into boar*

Did the pirates drop anything interesting? Tracy's about to ransack the ship.

>>42680
>wtf am I supposed to make of that
I know right? I'm guessing that means he lights himself on fire, or falls off, or knocks her over, or something that gets him stabbed or raped

>>42684
"you don't want to put me in the jar?"

>>42686
>You fall over and hit your neck in suck a way that you become quadraplegic, then she >rapes you like you asked, but you're unable to feel it or speak.

>>42687
*puts in jar because why not?*
*closes lid*
"There you go."

>>42688
That's way too harsh

>>42689
"haha pickle infernuis!!"

>>42681
But like a real pick up artist I can roll again with a different target right?

Can certain transmutations be made permanent?

>>42693
If they see you hitting on every female in the tavern, you might get a penalty.

>>42690
I'm ok with lighting himself on fire
>>42689
"Hey!" Pulls pickle out of jar, "
>>42691
Easy maneuver. Its not like you're air-dropping ppl over ab enemy site.
>>42693
Cuz there's plenty of pones (or females for that matter) to seduce?

>>42694
> -5 penalty on retries
Eh. I'll take it, and then go to the next tavern

>>42685
>>42695
What kind of clothes are they wearing?

>>42695
>not a lot of ponies
Touché. Is Felicia still pissy about that whole stabbing-her thing?

>>42695
>piloting +1
Torc looks for the rest of the party, where are they?

>>42698
I'd be, desu..

>>42701
I thought we were all on the airship?

>>42694
Depends, which transmutation?
>>42696
Thats seriously what you're going with
>>42699
dubs kek
>>42701
They're on the ship, surprised (relieved?) that they haven't died yet.

>>42701
"Present"

Trumpaladin has always looked somewhat orange, but he looks more orange than usual

>>42703
>>42704
I figured
"Hi guys, whats..."
>>42705
"Am I drunk already?"

>>42702
I'll talk her out of it

*pets pony with wing. The blue pony*

>>42706
"I don' know. You flying us all while buzzed?"

>>42704
What's the handle animal check to have sex with a horse?

>>42708
"I...
That d-depends, are you a horse right now?"

>>42704
Ones that aren't just drastic stat changes like bull's strength, but rather the ones that change the function or form of objects/people, like Animal Shape, Corrupt Weapon, or Air Walk.

>>42710
"PICKLE INI'S"

>>42710
*Trumpaladin displays his beautiful wings, gilded armor, and natural splendor*
"Yes"

>>42709
[happy pony noises]
"It's been a while since I've seen you like this, ~Flashy."
Hey wait, isn't Pegasus a magical beast, not an animal?
*shoots self for obnoxious metafaggotry*

>>42713
>>42712
"And... hes... a...

Pickle...

Who put LSD in my tea?"

>>42714
"But not long at all since I've seen you"
*Nuzzles pony with adorable pony nuzzle

FUCK YES I'M A PONY NOW!

That's correct, and shut the hell up. I was hoping GM wouldn't notice

>>42715
"Probably best not to trust food and drink you didn't prepare yourself"

>>42716
"Well, if you can't beat em..."
Torc polymorphs into a snake
"Polymorph party?"

>>42716
Oh please, animal form is legit, and I've been watching the whole way. Besides, I'm letting Infernius do this pickle-shit.

>>42716
*nuzzles back*
[nostalgic pony noises]
*kisses*

>>42718
*POOF IS MINOTAUR AGAIN*

>>42717
*Tries to avoid stepping on snake*
"Sure"

>>42719
*Nuzzles harder*
*Much harder*
"You never got over that night, did you?"
*kisses poner*

>>42721
"No step"
>Torc right now

[2d20 = 36]
>>42720
"Finally!"
First strike is a stunning blow (DC34 v Fort), second strike is (at -4) putting the bottle of air in Infernius' mouth.

>>42718
Under normal game rules, if he shifted into an inanimate object, would he have even been able to shift back?
>>42721
"~Hmmmm... I almost thought you'd forgotten..."
*rocks hips*
>>42722
There has to be a way to give Snek proficiency in one of those gunz

>>42723
>when Thez rolls a 20 on a melee attack

>>42724
Is Snek an Animal or a Construct btw?

>>42724
>snek gets a gun
I really like this idea, since there's 2
>>42725
She once killed a creature immune to melee damage with a 20 and 100 roll

>>42723
*Muffled concerned Minotaur noises*

>>42724
*nuzzling*
"You've never let me forget"
*Moves back and positions himself to get on top of her*
*trows forelegs over pony, and is now watching, along with Tracy, the scene in fornt of him*

>>42722
"I'll stay off your property"

>>42727
Kek

>>42727
>She once killed a creature immune to melee damage with a 20 and 100 roll

>>42724
I was thinking about it
>>42727
I love my snek
Torc finds a way to summon him so they can have a snek party
I like the idea that Mr. Snek is big and derpy until action happens
Can we do the gun thing?
>>42729
[Happy tongue flick noises]

>>42730
Mounts Pony

>>42732
I was thinking of that for myself

Also, can I free Mr. Snek from the staff?
Basically effectively destroying it, but as a result Mr. Snek just follows Torc around always in snek form?
>>42732
>get ancap pony as Torc's stone horse
>give her this

>>42731
Give him a hat too.

>>42734
Make the staff intelligent, so it can transform whenever it wants.

>>42735
Sneks in hats are a beautiful thing.
Consider it done, but what kind of hat?

>>42728
Though his ability to take in air from outside, the air supply of the bottle currently lodged in his throat is sufficient to sustain him.
"Well? Are you waiting for something?"
>>42731
>gun thing
Kind of like the image with the snek having a luger

>>42737
And convert him into a rod after you use up all of his spells.

>>42735
*is humping pony*
[Happy Horse Noises]

>>42739
"outside is* compromised*, the"

>>42740
Actually, there's a rod that already fits his description.
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Rod_of_the_Python

>>42739
I meant will you allow it, but lets fucking do it.
>>42740
>>42737
Smart, Torc transforms back and does the intellegence thing.
"There you go Mr. Snek, now to get you a hat."

>>42729
"Unf..!
It's been a while since we did it like this."
>>42733
*is mounted*
>>42741
[happy pony noises]
*bucks*

>>42739
*confused look*

>>42743
Since he's a quarterstaff, can he be made into a two-part weapon?

>>42743
Thats what snek is based off of
>>42744
Don't get shot training snek, but sure
>>42746
"GO PICKLE AGAIN!!" she's pushing him, but not in any particular direction.

>>42745
>considers having Mr. Snek break it up.
Nah
"Come on Mr. Snek, lets go into a different room."
Torc escorts Snek into a different room.

>>42748
*is pickle nao*
"pickle infernuis!"

>>42749
"THffff Thfffff" are the sounds of Snek's tongue shooting in and out emphatically.

>>42745
"Indeed it has."
*humps pony*
"I like doing it like this"

>>42748
>>42750
*is watching, really intently*
[pony sex noises]

>>42751
Snek wants to watch too

>>42750
"Mwahahahaha<whoooof>hahaha!"
Infernius will be busy for some time. Let me reiterate, this wasyour idea. Thez on the other hand seems quite flushed.

>>42749
>inb4 "mr.snake" is a female

Can Torc somehow increase Mr. Snek's INT? Actually, are his stats the same as a giant constrictor or something else?
>>42752
No he doesn't
>>42751
Wait, does he?
Ew
>>42754
Don't curse me like this