/sp/ - Football

>>19697
Ever get a blowjob from a fish?

>>19698
The technical term is noodling

>>19698
No, I'll ask the fish it's cool. Consent is key.
>>19700
Actually, that would require that I slather my cock in stink bait, which I wouldn't do since catfish bite.
Will post pics next time when it's not so windy. You will see fish getting smacked in the face by human COCK.

>>19702
>slapped by a cock
I mean, its /sp/ so...
>stinkbait
Oh, Im sure your hygene is fine enough. Ive spoken to several noodlers who's onky bait was... the noodle

>>19703
>Oh, Im sure your hygene is fine enough. Ive spoken to several noodlers who's onky bait was... the noodle
I bathe everyday, anon. Plus, I tried using my dick and the nibbling is rather painful. No, I will have payback and I will smack them with my dick after I catch them and post it here next time. They'll see! You'll all see!

Undoubtedly the weirdest vodka Ive ever tasted

>>19810
how is it? does it taste like tobacco? why did you pick it up?

>>19811
>why
Cuz it was $2.95
>does it taste like tobacco
... yes. Like, it tastes like moist menthol pipe tobacco smells.
Ngl, of all the cheap vodkas Ive drank, this one is a 6/10. Its mildly sweet and minty, with a very... uh... robust flavor of... well pipe tobacco.

>>19812
Do you like it?

>>19813
Its far and away from the worst thing, and for $3 what can I say? Prolly wont be buying again, even at the price tho. I cant imagine mixing this into anything, and after a few shots the flavor starts taking its toll

>>19814
>I cant imagine mixing this into anything, and after a few shots the flavor starts taking its toll
Thats rough buddy

>>19815
Imagine thinking from the residual flavor that you SHOULD want to vomit, but theres no impulse. Thats what this is like. Again, its still better than most cheap vodkas.
But seriously, whens the last time anyone mixed a drink and thought "Ya know what this is missing? Tobacco flavor!".
Could be fuel for the dirtiest martini you've ever tasted,...

For the love of God, do NOT make a dirty martini with menthol tobacco flavored vodka

>>19816
That is Very Weird Desu.
>>19818
Didn't go very well i presume?

>>19820
To be palatable, requires too much pickle juice to justify it as a martini. Just drink straight and chase.

>>19821
Chase with pickle juice?

>>19822
Pickle juice works, but with a chaser its more about palatte cleansing than anything. Go with what works. But mixing the 2, not recommended. Either it tastes like asshole, or the alcohol is too dilute to call a cocktail

Pickle juice is also good for hangovers. I think it has electrolytes and shit.
What drinks do you fags go for? I can't stand light beer anymore and I need something new to take my mind off of the fact that she will never be real and I will never hold her hoof.
What do?

>>19835
I Generally Go for a Nice Whiskey. Jack is always a good choice. But if you're going for a flavored drink, try crown royal apple, it tastes pretty good and goes down smooth. or if you're more of a rum drinker try coconut flavored captain Morgan. or if you have a real sweet tooth go for bailey's Irish Creme.

>>19835
>electrolytes
Gatorade could be better in that case. Probably better than drinking straight vinegar and salt.

>>19837
SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIT Send a whole case my way there anon-coon

guys are hydration pills really the ultimate hangover cure?

>>19835
Yes, pickle juice is literally the best thing when dehydrated, whether or not booz is involved, so always have pickle juice in ur fridge. Also, lemon wedges to avoid cramps.
>>19838
Gatorade is a good option when drinking, but has about half the electrolytes and 3x the sugar of pickle juice, jus sayin
>>19840
Combined with lots of water, its a good method

>>19839
I'll ship a barrel of frisky Negro whisky overseas.

>>19840
If you are dehydrated, might look into taking a few teaspoons of glycerin. A pound of it is rather cheap, like $10 or less.

https://www.webmd.com/vitamins/ai/ingredientmono-4/glycerol
>Glycerol is a naturally occurring alcohol. It is an odorless liquid that is used as a solvent, sweetening agent, and also as medicine.
>When glycerol is in the intestines, it attracts water into the gut, softening stools and relieving constipation. When glycerol is in the blood, it attracts water so that the water stays in the body longer. This might help an athlete exercise for longer.
(glycerol and glycerin are the same thing)

Being drunk at work is based.
>replace power steering pump
>charge them $700
>they get ass mad
>threaten to put a lien on their car if they don't pay
Wage cucks will never understand.

I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK
I LOVE SOYJAK

Happy 4/20 lads

What are you wonderful fags drinking tonight? I'm in the process of sending myself to Equestria via Ziegen Bock.

>>19963
based texas beer.
last night was my drinking night - had rum and coke (the coke was HEB brand, made in texas)

>>19964
>HEB brand
Nothing wrong with that.
Anyway, it's a fact that Best State has better beer than the rest. Well, except for Lone Star. Lone Star sucks.

>>19963
Coca-Cola.

>>19967
Cheers.

>>19963
Salty tears

no idea whats happening in this picture, but I like it. Reminds me of this thread.

Enjoy.

What to write about while drunk... Hmm, bestiality.
This strange sexual lifestyle is of the utmost secrecy given that the taboos that come with the act of inter-species sex are very negative with the normal populace than being a homosexual is, thus most men who perform such debauch deeds remain in clandestine relationships with their equines.
Ponies are so fucking crazily hot to me it's unbearable to not get an erection by being near and touching them. The amount of times i have ejaculated inside of mares and filly's is well over 100, i may be bragging about my personal affairs although it is the truth and i have no else to tell other than some random anons who lurk and post here.It feels so wrong, then again, it feels so right! Ah, i'm careless and lustful in a way that many would consider disgraceful, alas, my emotions for such delightful herbivorous beasts are intense in the uttermost sense of extremeness. I rant and rant every once in a blue moon, about my own passions.

White men drink beer to celebrate the end of a long day's work.

>>20150
Ponies are not for sexual, anon.

>>20169
This. The sexualization of horses is one fine line away from the sexualization of children. Anon can posture and flaunt his depravity and predatory nature all he wants, wrap it up in all the rationale and pretty metaphors he wants, without changing the fact that he abuses animals and gloats about it.
Seriously, what should be done about an 'adult' who had abused ('came inside' as it was declared) children over 100 times?
>Reeeee, they're not children
Mentally THEY ARE.
This is the natural result of a fandom that tries to one-up eachother with increasingly grotesque depictions and visualizations of sexualization with cartoon mares. Shitposting has it's place, but this has gone way beyond.
Of course, Im sure if subject to a battery of questions anon in this case could be readily determined to have his own mental retardation, such that he is likewise mentally a child.
>So it's okay right? If theyre both mentally children, and neither objects, its fine!
By that logic, is it okay for a 20 year old retard to have sex with a 14 year old if they're okay with it?

>>20171
He never claimed to be retarded or support the nonsense idea that "Mental age" matters more than your physical age.

>>20171
Idk about that, Anon. Fucking an animal is nowhere near as bad as fucking a kid, but both are still pretty fucked up.

>>20172
>nonsense idea that mental age matters more than physical age
>Nonsense
The attempt was made to strongman anon's argument, in observance of his views shat literally fucking horses is in any way not.rightfuly deserving of a bullet; that if anon was retarded to the effective mentality of a horse/teen, that exceptions might be considered, except no.
>>20173
Not as bad, perhaps; a slippery slope that needs not be explored.

A bullet is a bit hyperbolic; puberty blockers chemical castration seems more fitting

>>20174
Again, I agree that they're both really fucked up, but people have this weird mental trap where they compare the minds of animals to those of human beings. I took vet. med. before dropping out of college, and I can tell you that animals are not like people. Comparing animals to humans in terms of intelligence is degenerate. Personifying animals is bad for both people and animals. I blame Disney and shit.
That being said, I agree that literal horsefucking is extremely degenerate and should never be tolerated, but comparing it to pedophilia is like comparing apples to oranges and does nothing but set a precedent that diminishes the harm caused by child molestation.
>>20175
This.

>>20176
Fair points

I want to cum inside berry punch. I want to take her on a date and give her much delicious pasta, bread sticks, and some fancy French wine. Then I want to take her home and make sweet but gentle love to her. First comes the smooching, then comes the many little kisses that slowly wind down her body, then cunnilingus, then slow and steady penetration.
Then I want to fuck her hard. I want to tear into her like she's a case of beer. I want to fuck her hard.
Alcoholism is rough.

>>20265
>it attacks the lowest and weakest braincells first.
>somehow this makes the brain more efficient
That is not how brains work, and that is not how alcohol works.

>>20266
This is the drunk thread faggot.

Finally I am drunk and remembered to post

Smoking some SneedOG

Intoxication is based and a classic European tradition.

>>20557
Jews want the white man drunk.

>>20558
Anon, people have been drinking alcohol before kikes even existed and alcohol has often been a common facet European cultures specifically. I'm not forsaking a rich cultural tradition to pwn the Jews or whatever.

>>20559
What do you gain when you drink alcohol?

Anyone here ever try DMT?

>>20558
So? A broken clock is right twice a day. Not everything they want you to do is a bad idea.

>>20560
I love the taste of beer and I enjoy having a light buzz. I don't "gain" anything. Same with marijuana. It's enjoyable and doesn't have any serious health effects unless you're a retard that abuses it.
Why does it bother you?
>>20561
I did shrooms once. Fucking horrible experience. Would DMT make me see mares?

>>20558
Jews want the white man in despair. Sometimes that means drunk, but alcohol is fine in moderation.

>>20565
It might

I'm drunk and I'm really fucking crying over the fact that Lír and Amalthea never got married. He didn't even get to cum inside her at all.
My heart is so fucking broken. It's not right!

Just boofed a pint of DMT. It's amazing, guys. There are mares everywhere!

>>20690
I've always wanted to try DMT

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5WmKoQ__nkw

MLP characters when their clothes don't cover their asses or genitals

5 months later...
>>20169
>Ponies are not for sexual, anon.
They're irresistible!
>>20171
>Seriously, what should be done about an 'adult' who had abused ('came inside' as it was declared) children over 100 times?
Make that 200 now. Cry moar fgt, Kek. (You) know, filly's pretty much are kids, right?
.>>20565
>I did shrooms once. Fucking horrible experience.
I've had around 15 experiences with them, some trips can be more freaky than others.
Once, i had about 1.5g psilocybe semilanceata with 3g syrian rue and I saw like a demon face coming out of the wall with a long snake like tongue and horns, at the time it was funny to me but for some other people it can freak them out.
I'm high at the moment. (amnesia and lemon haze)

Happy, like, uhhhh... Hitler Day or whatever, faggots.

Feeling a little stoned and feeling sad about the state of our Women, i hate this age bros. i wish i would have been born 100 years ago instead of in this one.

>>21091
Happy 4/20.
/)

>>21092
Happy 4/20 to you too.
https://youtu.be/UYcjlmeRNTo

At the bar today. Spending my meager pay at the Junkyard. Cheese wedges and fishy chippies plus all the liquor I can fit in me. How bout you niggers?

>>21657
Perhaps the meme was ill advised

Come on. I know you're here. You show up when niggle dee and niggle dum show up without fail. Instantly when possible.
Say something. Show someone out there that you're there too.

>>21659
Fine, goodnight. Niggers.

Alcohol brings you closer to niggers

Anyone here ever try blue lotus?

>>22966
No. Sounds expensive. What's it like?

Hi everypony :)

>>22985
Hello.

>>20171
Still one of my best posts, ngl

>>22987
You're still retarded.

>>22968
It's like weed.

>>24862
This is amazing. Kudos to your stellar aesthetic preferences.

>>24863
Dont thank me, thank the furry artist (mlp is furry btw)

>>24864
It isn't. Obligatory KYS.

>>24864
Okay, groomer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VzGCZaGaryw

holy shit I hate the feds so much
just did a soap stream and was drinking. now am drunk and can't sleep because room spins a little too much.
should I make a cytube for stupid soap-making and such streams in the future?

>>24872
forgot pictures

>>24872
>>24873
Yay soups!
Hello!

hi peppermint here, lmk what yall are drinking. i usually drink vodka.

>>24875
Captain Morgan White and Canada Dry because that's all I have until payday
Post moar rising crust

>>24875
Joose Screwdriver. I like my booz like I like my coffee: cheap, and in my belly

The person who is knowledgeable in flatulence is a Fartographer