This thread begins with Infernius pushing random buttons on an already random object of ridiculous power.
Welcome to the next page of the thread series that everyone knows about but no one mentions cuz autism.
Its a role-playing thread, welcoming involved/random shitposting in addition to participation.
There's plenty of material if you wanna get a glimpse, otherwise I'll get back to it.
The first effect that is discharged by the rod is a ridiculously compressed stream of air, blowing back everyone around Infernius.
The second effect is that Infernius himself becomes invisible.
The third effect is someone adjacent to infernius is hit by Flesh to Stone.
The fourth effect is that Enlarge Size is cast on the statue-character..
The fifth effect is the rod summons a mouse.
Players should roll a d100
Welp, this should be fun
[1d100 = 22]
Goddamnit Infernius
Why couldn't you wait until we figured out what the hell these things are before fucking us up with them?
>>46439>lack of common senseThis is more of a wisdom thing though
>>46438>>46439>mfw low mental stats, so can make bad decisions and still be in-character
>>46440Nah. Its int related.
>>46437>16Easily the lowest role, unsurprisingly. Allow me to amend my previous declaration of what happened.
>>46444You sure?
I thought INT was things like textbook knowledge and WIS was common sense
>>46442>Trying to thaw my icy heart with a warm island songreeeeee
[1d100 = 49]
Rolling for Fae
>inb4 infernius turns himself too stone and the enlarge only effects his one horn
Trumpaladin grabs onto his kitty and some portion of the loot as he braces for whatever the fuck was just unleashed
Or does kitty run after the mouse? I am not sure
>>46449
Roll to see if the mouse distracted her.
Gust of Wind,
Invisible Infernius,
Infernius Flesh to Stone,
Infernius Large Size,
Summon Mouse.
For kicks, I'm gonna say that the visible mouse is staring curious at everyone on a part of the invisible giant statue of Infernius, maybe on the tail.
>>46450I call the ring, scroll, and a goat. So can have what ever else you want
>>46453So wait, from the party's perspective, Infernius turned invisible, and we don't know what happened to him after that?
[1d20+21 = 35]>>46453"Did he just turn himself into a floating mouse?"
Spellcraft for Torc to know what spells where cast
>>46453Does he block the door?
[1d20+20 = 31][1d20+23 = 42]>>46453Top kek
Sicking Fae on the mouse
Spot, listen, and grapple
>>46459okay, no sic. Just observe
>>46459>inb4 she smacks face first into the invisible Infernius.
>>46459For all we know, Infernius is that mouse
>>46460He can't be seen, and isn't moving or breathing.
>>46462Fug! It'd totally look like that!
Dammit!
>>46460Uhm,...
>>46461I like this one better.
Also, I really want this rod now.
>>46463Thats why I did
>>46456
>>46462I was going to have her grapple, bite, and swallow whole figuring even a celestial mouse or demon mouse couldn't beat her, but then I figured "yeah, that'd look bad"
>>46461That could definitely also happen
>>46466Were you able to detect invisibility?
>>46464Gib Fae's reaction.
>>46465You want everything
>>46468With a 35 I'd hope so, but GM hasn't said
>>46469I want Invisibility, m8.
>>46472Yeah, it'd be great. Also, Mouse is /bestsummon/.
>>46473Torc's snek staff makes an offended hiss
Until it's clear what just happened, Tracy casts Charm Animal on the mouse to bring it towards her.
"Now where did you come from?"
[1d20+23 = 36][1d20+20 = 33]>>46476Interesting
>>46470Yes, I missed the roll, but especially with Fae bouncing off shit (giving a bonus to the detect) he can tell there's a large invisible Infernius-shaped object there.
>>46478I missed the roll for her to grapple because the Email field isn't long enough, so Fae spot checked but never charged
Tracy has called it forward
>>46478"Okay, don't fucking quote me here, but I think infernius is invisible and stoned"
>>46480"Weed is bad for you"
[1d20+27 = 28]>>46474Tracy bursts out laughing at the cat-meme.
Sleight of Hand to conceal Hand Of Glory while casting its See Invisibility.
I gtg for a while. I would say don't do anything stupid, but then you guys couldn't do anything.
[1d20+20 = 27]
[1d20+25 = 45]
Grapple mouse from right in front of Tracy
Swallow
>>46485>20 on a swallowPlace a cloak of resistance on Fae just in case she needs to roll a Fort save
[1d100 = 48]>>46482I assume that's a fumble.
Tracy lets out a growl of frustration as she goes looking for her hand.
Rolling 1d100 to see if she hits her head on the statue.
>>46485She K.O. though.
>>46487I never rolled the grapple earlier (because fucking email field is too short) so the mouse came to Tracy when called
Wait, it's in the animated gauntlet.
><BANG!>
"OW! Wtf is going on here?!"
*Uses See Invisibility*
>>46487Yes that is a fumble, and in addition to dropping the hand she also falls over and is now prone.
>>46490It's in her gauntlet, can she use it while on the ground?
>>46491she still would've dropped it, but it wouldn't be hard to get back.
>>46490I'm still claiming the 20 in
>>46485
While still on the ground Tracy uses her hand and peers up at the thing she hit her head on.
"....... OH, for fuck's sake..!"
>>46493Fae hit her head on the statue though.
>>46494No, because the order to run was not complete because the fucking email field won't let me roll three dice with modifiers
>>46493Thats fine, the mouse is irrelevant, and Torcuil detected invisible-giant-statue-Infernius (though isn't sure what it is yet).
<whooof> Thez reappears holding the 4 Ivory Goats, which are now clustered with obscene amounts of gems and gold."I fixed 'em!"
>>46495Whatever. she got the mouse.
>>46496Are we in the temple or the tower, I'm confused now.
"The dumb bull fucking turned himself to stone somehow, and he's fatter too" Tracy grumbles, peering through the hand
>>46496"Just... You know money can be exchanged for goods and services, right?"
>>46497*pets purring kitty*
>>46499"Uh, Flashy, if you will..?"
*gestures towards the general direction of the bull*
"It's a pain to move in here while this invisible fatass is petrified"
>>46497As far as I can imagine, they're just outside the pyramid, in the airship, cuz thats where they would have taken the shit to and where it would be transported from. Also cuz it makes sense.
>>46498"These were goods, but now they're "betters"!" ^_^
>>46501"Um thez what going on?"
>>46502You can't talk. You're petrified.
>>46499>break enchantment
>>46501"Uh huh"
>>46500"Bippitty Boppitty boop"
Trumpaladin casts whatever spell Tracy's faggot thinks could help this situation, even though he hasn't a clue how to unfuck this
>>46506Break enchantment should free him of transmutations.
>>46502Thez shows Infernius the "Better" goats. It looks like someone has layered gobs of gold on the surface of the figures, and then thrown a bunch of precious stones all over them. In some cases the gold/gems completely obscures the fact that they're goats.
"I know it looks bad, but I've got a guy for it. He bases the final design off what I give him so I just give him lots of metal and lots of stones." ^_^
>>46507Bippitty Boopity boop Break Enchantment is cast at what Tracy is pointing at
>>46508"Now I
know you're just doing it to piss me off"
*glares*
>>46508"You do good job, me think they look pretty."
>>46509Requires a caster level check against the caster level of the rod.
>>46515Im not petrified right?
>>46516I'm not sure about that desu
[1d20 = 16]>>46515Rolling. I don't know trumpaladin's caster level
>A little bit o time
Trump's caster level is 17. What is the rod's?
>Want that invisibility ~sooo hard
K, so Infernius quickly reappears, shrinks down to normal, and turns back into flesh, holding the rod.
>>46520Then Infernius is free?
*rubs sore head*
"Good to see you're alive, dumb bull."
I actually g2g nao
>>46519It's a Rod of wonder Tracy's faggot. It only turns you invisible if you roll an 80 to 84 on a d100. The essence of it is that you never know what you're going to get from it.
Now use your sneak and hide and move silently skills, and all your billions of items if you want to execute le Ebin super sneak attacks. Role play better
>>46522"Thanks tracy."
>>46523"Thank you ny friend."
>>46524"I,... didn't know you were still here tbh."
Insert statue comparison dialogue
>>46524"And you are very welcome"
*pats and hugs Minotaur*
*stares at pony*
>>46527"Careful with that rod, its got lots of buttons on it, who knows what could happen!" ^_~
So before going anywhere with it, how available will anyone be tomorrow, and/or is there any interest in continuing it through the evening and/or further?
Burgers have tomorrow off is why I ask.
>>46529There's 4. One of them looks like its running fast, one of them looks strong with big curled horns. One of them has reaaaaally long and pointy horns, and one of them is very small, like a pet goat.
>>46530I want the long horns
Fuck I gtg again
>>46530I need to move back to my school year apartment
and I have a seminar paper that needs to be completed
soon, so if we took tonight and two days off, or just one, that would be greatly appreciated
>>46533Take all the time you need. I can't guarantee that there won't be shitposting, cuz I'll be doing some of it, but we won't go nowhere. Maybe.
>>46524"... Say.. can I try-out that rod?"
>>46535"I don't think that rod does what you think it does"
Trumpaladin, terrified of what the foolish pony might summon, carefully removes and pockets the ring shield, and places on the ring with the flame motif
>>46537
Tracy's faggot likes pushing buttons.
[1d100 = 62]>>46538Let Infernius have this one. It's truly the perfect item for him. He is beloved of the dice gods and favored by his patron deity in a way none of the rest of us are
Rolling because I'm equally curious
Did he push separate buttons on it, or did he push a single button several time?
I want to try it out.
>>46539What did you roll for?
>>46541>>46540It's a rod of wonder. You use it in a standard action and it has a list of possible effects. You don't determine these effects before hand, you roll a d100 to determine what happens
>>46542So, you're saying you just used the rod?
>>46542Why does it have multiple buttons then?
>>46543Well, to actually use the rod would require stealing it from Infetnius which opens a shit load of possible issues I'd rather avoid. I made a what-if roll to see what would happen if I did have it, however. In this case, it would have grown a field of grass
*Fae lays low in non-existent grass field stalking prey*
>>46544Because how else are you going to describe a rod of wonder?
>>46546A rod with a single, big, red, irresistable button on it that does something random every time.
>>46547Tell me what you think the rod is
>>46532I guess that goat is really....
Horny
>>46548A rod with five functions that were generated randomly, with the list of a rod of wonder.
You wouldn't know unless you pushed the same button twice.
>>46550That removes all the fun of randomness and is too OP. Just play the game and stop seeking cheats. Embrace the dice
>>46551>too OPWhy? There are plenty of cooler rods.
And why should I stop looking for cool items?
>>46552You can keep looking for cool items, but a rod that consistently has five seperate functions like that is imbalanced
>>46554
Regardless of whatever it is, I want to press the buttons again.
>>46553There are other rods with multiple affects, fyi.
Can Torc roll to decipher that scroll now?
>>46530My family wants me to go on a trip tomorrow morning, so I can't play until this evening.
>>46558*tomorrow evening
Otr maybe later in the afternoon
>>46557Its a scoll of Confusion
>>46560What happened when Trumpaladin put on the ring?
>>46561Hey, I wanted the ring...
>>46560Well thats no fun
>>46561Nothing discernable
[1d20+16 = 27]>>46563Rolling to Appraise its value.
>>46564Not when its being worn
>>46565Aww..
Does that mean I can't tell how much something is worth until I've already stolen it?
Also, can I use Search to frisk NPCs for what they're carrying?
>>46566Not with any accuracy no
>>46569So I can tell if they have anything worth stealing.
>>46567Sorry, I meant Spot.
>>46570You want to know if Tracy can stop people and then frisk them, so she can then steal from them.
A spot check would work for anything visible, and some concealed stuff (weapons, for example), but wouldn't work to detect other things.
>>46562Armor that has flame motifs signifies armor that provides fire resistance (to a degree) to its wearer. I don't know about rings, but my best bet is that the guy who is made out of cloth and who surrounded himself with gunpowder dust wanted some measure of protection against fire damage.
>>46563That's much better than "roll for will save"
>>46573Give Tracy the ring so she can appraise its market value.
>>46575If you know how much it's worth, you've got a slight hint at what it might be.
Also, I want to use my Rogue skills.
>>46576>cuz I wanna steal it
>>46576Alright, fine. I'm betting on a ring that does 5 or 10 fire-energy resistance.
"You may appraise it, but please give it back when you are done. I want to go dragon hunting some day, and I think this ring complements the one you gave me nicely"
*removes ring from finger and hands to pony*
>>46576>what it might do>not letting your sorceror check the magic shit to see what it does>>46573I still want it....
>gunpowderIt wasn't gunpowder tho
[1d20+16 = 18]>>46578Rolling once again to appraise
>>46580It looks to be worth about 1200gp
[1d20+2 = 22]>>46582Torc tries an appraise
What stat bonus do I apply to these checks?
>>46579I'm open to trade, it's just that every character already is using all of their ring slots. Did you remember the ring of protection? That gives +3 or something to AC. Tracy also has one, she just prefers to wear a ring of animal friendship instead. Because you know, the odds of being engaged in Melee combat in a dungeon is much lower than needing to raise animals
>>46583A Natural 20 works just fine
>>46583Its a ring of Elemental Resistance +10, Trump nailed it
>>46583HOLY FEKKING SHIET M8S
>>46584No I don't remember that
>>46586Yeah, I'll fucking trade.
>>46585Future refernece, what stat would I apply?
>>46582>>46578*gives ring back*
"You're other ring looks cooler."
>>46584Tracy will have a ring slot open if she's able to use one of those Mummy hands like she used Kefka's, but that could take a bit.
Wait a minute, if King Doot is still undead, doesn't that mean the curse on his body is still active? Maybe his hands are still dangerous.
>>46588*pets pony*
>>46587I'm not sure what stats would be applied. I think you would apply your number of ranks in the Appraise skill, and either your wisdom or your intelligence modifier
>>46590[happy pony noises]
>>46590You use your Int modifier to appraise.
>>46590Apraise is a feat, I figured wis or int just wasn't sure enough to call it
>>46591Ah, so 20+2+3.
Fucking [i]nice
>>46592Appraising a rare item would be a DC of 15, 20 or more.
What exactly does a skill mean when it says "trained only?"
>>46593Reeee its a feat, not a skill
>>46594Sorry, but you're wrong about that
>>46595>>46596>>46597Wait, my bad. Torc's bonus is from diligence, not appraise. Sorry
Can Tracy press another button on the wand?
>>46599*puts ring back on*
>>46600Which ring? The fire resistance or the Bees?
>>46601NO NOT THE BEES
>Nick Cage noises
>>46601Resistance, since the odds of summoning a fireball are greater than the odds of summoning a melee fighter that the extra AC will be necessary for
[1d20+16 = 18]
[1d20+23 = 35]
Fug it
Sleight of Hand to gently lift wand from unresponsive Minotaur's hand.
Appraise to determine its value.
>>46605the first one is the Appraise.
>>46605Why do you keep rolling 2s?
>>46605>fucking +16 on appraiseIs that rogue?
>>46606>>46605This is mostly just to check if it's really what Trumpaladin said.
>>46607It should be enough if it was what you said.
>>46608I put 15 into Appraise so that she could quantify the value of any item she acquired (+1 Int modifier). Yes, it is a Rogue skill.
>>46609Fuck appraising
Press a button and rollin a d100 if oou really wanna know
>>46610Understandable
>>46606Nice try.
>>46609Cuz Infernius turning invisible, giant, and a statue (which was undone in that order so he was witnessed in all three states) wasn't enough of a clue?
How about the mouse?
Mods are finally getting around to killing flags. Tell me now if you want to keep custom flags on the VX board so I can try to argue for a board exception
[1d100 = 30]>>46612I just wanted to see.
*points at open air*
Rolling to press random button.
Can Torc press a button?
>>46613F
I wouldn't mind keeping them, but if everyone else says "Fuck you you little bitch" I would be fine with flags being oone
>>46614Ah fug
[1d15+5 = 12]
Also, I am of the mind that immediately after pushing a button, if possessing the means to do so they can mark the button in some way. The rod that Lenos has bears a small cute kitty face finely scratched next to the appropriate button.
>>46613If they're killing flags board-wide, I would appreciate an exception for /vx/, and in particular I would go back to the derpy flag. It was to not flag-fag on the board that I got rid of it at all. Desu.
>>46617>they can mark the button in some way.THIS Is why I wanted to test it.
>Stinking cloud"~Eeeew..."
"The TRUE power of a Rod of Wonder is when you have all the buttons pressed and marked, but you "keep pushing unmarked buttons". Technically, there are unlimited functions on them, and marking each button forces the GM to come up with new properties," Thez says, eyeballing it. "This one doesn't seem to have any marks."
>>46620That's just free infinite stone skin etherealness invisibility fireball summon monster grass growing etc etc etc
More haxx than all other combined, and it takes away the fun of randomness when it can just be discovered and marked under laboratory conditions
[1d100 = 48]>>46620>mfw know this is a bad idea but I can't resist pressing buttons*urge to press buttons intensifies*
>>46621>it takes away the fun of randomnessNo it doesn't. Watch this.
*presses button like a 9 Wis Psychopath*
>>46622>sigh[1d14+5 = 7]"Give me that"
Torc grabs the rod and presses a button
[1d100 = 12]
[4d6 = 19]>>46621Under "ideal" circumstances, you're right. Take this for example.
Thez loses her balance for a moment and leans face-first along the rod pressing this many buttons.
Trumpaladin rides Fae the fuck out of the room
Stuff like that happens all the time. Heck, anyone carrying the thing just added a new category to their natural 1 dice rolls.
[19d100 = 1021]>>46624Oh no
Here you go
>>46628TY, I was rolling to determine number of buttons.
>>46629This is gonna get out of hand real quick, isn't it?
>>46629.... Who was it pointed at?
>>46629Thez is now permanently color changed, as is something else. Congratulations. Infernius will not be pleased
>>46634
Better start recoloring.
I guess she looks like one of those Avatar women now
Now now, I did say "for example". That was a hypothetical illustration, and not intended to be a lasting scenario.
>>46633>>46636Rolling d2 to detirmine 1 user or 2 target
[1d2 = 1]And rolling d3 to determine color for shits and giggles
[1d3 = 2]1 purple
2 green
3 blue
>>46636So
now you're making an effort to avoid turning into Princess Fiona
>>46635>Better start recoloring.ReeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeAngry content-producer noises!
>>46636Yeah.. sure it was..
>>46638I haven't gone down the list, but I know she's the one turned into a statue this time
>>46641Your character is green now
She still looks okay though
>>46642A green statue, 'cuz the color-change took place after the flesh to stone
>>46643The invisible again too? I figured I'd go over it after a bit.
Ogre Fiona is hotter than human
>>46644>10>9>System checks show nominal>8>7>retracting arm>6>5>4>system is go>3>2>1>We have liftoff on my sides
.... I want the random-rod..
>>46648I know, I'm shocked by this revelation.
>>46649Fuck, I wasn't expecting this
>>46645Do I need to cast a spell on her or something?
I can tan her
Orange Master-race
>>46648I fucking love pushing buttons, man; even imaginary ones.
I'm pretty autistic that way...
>>46650It necessitates a complete overhaul of current strategy, by sheer inconceivability. Who could have guessed.
>>46652More secrets, completely unknown before this point
>>46652Your character can borrow the wand, just don't hurt yourself with it
You'e going to hurt yourself with it though I'm sure
summon another creature, I want to make Fae eat another one
\r
>>46654Do we know which button summons creatures though?
*presses button*
[1d100 = 72]>>46655Everyone roll a 1d100; lowest roll just got slowed.
[1d100 = 78]>>46655I need something to point this thing at.
*summons dire rat*
*presses random button*
>>46659Oh fuck
[1d100 = 27]>>46658Not yet
>>46660>summons dire ratHow again?
>>46665Oh, snap. I totally missed that, that was before the facepalm even. Fair point, Trump and Fae are clear.
Torcuil then, is slowed.
"Put a snail symbol next to that one!" Thez says
[1d100 = 69]*presses yet another button*
>>46667carves snail
>>46667Reeee stop with the haxx!
There's more than enough as is
[1d100 = 28]>>46668Yep... I just hit the landmine...
[1d100 = 39]>>46670Oops! I pressed another button!
Tiny Tracy runs away, pointing the rod ahead of her as she continues to push buttons.
>>46670You're too small to hold the rod.
>>46669Oh, it just bit him in the ass.
>>46672What her size category?
>>46673She was formerly on the borderline between medium and small
Now she's like tiny
Tracy just got reduced to 1/12 her height.
I'm not quite sure the exact numbers and thus the size, but its 1"/foot tall
>>46673*assumes monstrous shape*
She should be ~just big enough to press buttons now.
*Presses button once more (if she already pressed one, reroll)*
>>46676You are now five inches at the shoulder
>>46677The grass is now high enough for Fae, who swallowed whole a creature Tracy's size, to sneak around
>>46676Stahp w/ the buttons!
She's literally toy sized!
[1d20+39 = 41]>>46677Rolling to Gide in grass (bonus because size).
"You'll never find me! Squeals a tiny voice."
[1d20+20 = 29][1d20+23 = 25]>>46681Spot Check Listen Check from Fae
Hey Trumpaladin, your god just declared me Anon Filly. Does this mean I turn anon filly ingame?
>>46681"Are you fucking kidding me?"
>>46684Wut?
[1d100 = 52]>>46683Lol!
Runs off Pressing yet another button she hasn't marked
[1d100 = 83]>>46686Everyone roll to see who got bigger
[1d20+23 = 32][1d20+20 = 30]>>46686Sounds and grass movement
Okay, so if I'm understanding this correctly, Thez is Green, Tracy is diminutive, and Torcuil is Anon Filly?
>>46692Torcuil's Faggot has now been bestowed Faggotry over Anon
Griffon Filly.
>>46693Thez is lots of things. She took every "against an opponent" effect that was pressed.
>>46693The room is also full of elephant grass.
>>46696Huh, that fits with the motif of Tracy running off,....
This is what happens by the way, its not crazy haxx that result of such items, its shenanigens.
[1d20+20 = 34][1d20+23 = 25]>>46697>>46696Spot and Listen Check!
>>46698So long as the buttons aren't marked
[22d100 = 1109]
*mashes a bunch of buttons*
>>46695>I now have 3 charactersIs it the real Anon Filly, or just the griffon in disguise?
>>46699No one ever gets a chance to mark the "shrink" button.
>>46700Can you wait for just a minute?
[2d100 = 81]>>46700Rolling for the two summoned animals
>>46701Griffon? We did have the real anon filly show up, but I think there are many anon fillies
[3d20 = 29]>>46703>Two elephantsI can live with that
POUNCE!
>>46704>tfw button-marking pioneer[Unwise faggot noises]
[4d6+7 = 14][3d6+7 = 14]>>46705
>>46704No, the act of being shrunk made Tracy lose track of which button it was. What happened after the shrinking is subject to a
SERIOUS review, and and can be considered 'potential'.
[1d100 = 26]
*presses button*
[1d20+16 = 24]
[1d20+16 = 25]
Elephant on Fae: gore attack and slam
[3d20 = 25]>>46711I really need to Armor Fae. Neither attack landed. Fae: full attack
[22d100 = 1221]>>46709*Trots on remote with all four hooves, pointing it at any random entity, pressing as many buttons as she can*
[1d100 = 29]
I think I preferred being chaotic neutral, desu...
*Presses yet another button*
e\\_/e
Thez leans over to GM and whispers, "Crimson Sky."
>>46715Stahp
GM, can I get stats for anon filly?
[1d20+16 = 29]
[1d20+16 = 19]
Attack on Fae
>>46719Undetermined so far.
The normally peaceful and placcid blue skies above port barry turn a sick and deep red color, as the sun darkens in brightness and intensity.
[4d100 = 183]>>46719I
need to press EVERY BUTTON!
*Hops with all four hooves, pressing four random buttons*
[2d6+10 = 21]>>46720Poor Fae is slammed. Damn good think she ain't a bitch
>Fae has taken more damage now from her Master's madness than from a room full of mummies, sort of like how her master took more damage from jumping from a horse than a lich, or from sexually assaulting a horse than from a room full of mummies
[3d20 = 30]>>46724Fae responds with full attack
[4d6+7 = 23][3d6+7 = 16]>>46725
>>46721Can I at least confirm if it is the griffon?
[4d100 = 115]
[maniac cackling]
[2d20 = 19]>>46726Elephant is almost kill
>>46727You
are the filly
[3d20 = 33]>>46729What a hell of a difference those last two AC make. Trachemar would have taken damage
Kill elephant
[4d6+7 = 20][3d6+7 = 19]>>46730
>>46727It is a griffon wizard (sigh), currently operating under an alter self spell, expressed by faggot to intend to cast wish to break up Infernius and Thez and/or make Thez' baby Trump's.
Thez and Bones are the only characters who know Anon is a Griffon
>>46731Where is Trump in all this?
[4d100 = 102]
Tracy continues hoping on the rod with all four hooves, spinning the rod like a bottle
*Press, press, press, press!*
[1d20 = 11][1d20 = 18]>>46733Watching the fights like a roman emperor watching a lion kill exotic imported animals. Should he enter the ring? Fuck it, ENTERS RING
Rolling for intiative
[1d20 = 17]>>46735Elephant charges Trump and attempts gore attack
Why the fuck did I not put on the ring shield and the ring of protection
[4d100 = 156]>>46737Because fireballs are flying out every once in a while.
Good thing the deck is fireproof
>>46732Does anyone see any reason to keep the griffon?
>>46729Well I am, I don't think Torc is though
[2d8+15 = 28][2d100 = 74]>>46737FUCK. Lands against his lower 31 AC rolling for damage and those other two creatures Tracy summoned
[4d20 = 58]>>46736There are two other new elephants if Thez wants to kill something, besides the one attacking Trump and the one Fae killed
Trump: full round attack
>>46739Because that faggot may come back?
Before anyone rolls anything else, can
I get a quick rundown?
[4d10+30 = 49]>>46741Damage
[2d20 = 37]>>46742Tracy's Faggot is a Psycho, and Trumpaladin is killing elephants that have been summoned en masse by Tracy
rolling for Gore and Slam attack against Trumpaladin. A 15 or higher lands
[1d20 = 6]>>46744Jesus Christ. Rolling to confirm threat
>>46742Tracy is hidden, rolling the rod around the room, using the advantage of her fine size and high Dex to be un-findable.
Every once in a while, she spins the rod like a bottle, and jumps on it with all fours for 4 random buttons.
[2d8+15 = 25][2d6+10 = 15]>>46745THANK GOD. Not a crit. Rolling for damage on Trump
[4d20 = 34]>>46747Sigh, Full round against elephant
[4d10+30 = 53]>>46748FUCKING KEENED SWORD OF SHARPNESS!!!
>>46742>rundownI'm leaving, see you guys later
>>46746The room is also full of Elephant grass, making it appear like the jungles of India, and making it easier for the fine-sized psychopath to Hide.
[1d20 = 5]>>46746<whooooof>SQUISH
[1d20+4 = 9]>>46752Tracy has Improved Evasion. Can she roll a Reflex save?
>already knows she wouldn't make it, but rolling anyway
>>46754No, its purely armor class based. Thez has a +43 to attack, and Tracy gets a +4 to AC for size.
[4d20 = 54]>>46751You're fucking lucky there are elephants to kill. And that I am equally psychotic
Trumpaladin dons the shield ring, and exchanges his engagement ring for the ring of protection. AC is now 38
MOUNTS LION DRAGON
BOTH ELEPHANTS ATTACK!
[7d20 = 101][2d6+10 = 16]>>46756Fae is slammed. But Trumpaladin and Fae strike back!
>>46756I'm having so much fun right now.
[4d10+30 = 52][7d6+14 = 41]>>46757All attacks landed and Fae took 16 damage
>>46758I am too actually
[4d20 = 21]>>46759The elephant is damned near kill, but they strike back
[7d20 = 75]>>46760Pls no squish Trump and Fae for gladiatorial combat
>>46761Weak ass rolls from them. Trumpaladin targets the next elephant while Fae targets the near death one
>>46762Its not a fatal squish, its a "stopping Tracy from pushing anymore buttons, so I can make sure she isn't unraveling space time by this point" squish
[4d10+30 = 48][5d6+10 = 26]>>46763Fae trips on elephant corpse, but first elephant is kill I think and every attack lands on the other one
>>46764Tho I will say, check your ID
>>46765[squished pony noises ]
[4d20 = 37]>>46764F
>>46766Last elephant attacks. Twice, because Fae tripped and so lose a turn, but Trumpaladin dismounts to face the Elephant alone
>>46768An unseen force disrupts Thez' balance, unsquishing Tracy.
[4d20 = 42]>>46769But an elephant can't Touch Trumpaladin
Full round attack
[4d10+30 = 55]>>46771Even a two lands, and Trumpaladin wonders to himself why he doesn't use Power Attack or Drunken Sword
[2d20 = 15]>>46772Elephant, with 1 hit point left - no really, 1 hp - attacks back defiantly
[4d20 = 45]>>46773Weak. Trumpaladin finishes
[1d20+15 = 32]>>46770*urge to resume pressing buttons arises*"... Heheheheh..! S-sorry about that.."
her face betrays her feelings thoughRolling Bluff, because that's what she'd do
[1d20+18 = 33]>>46775Spot-check conter
[1d20+27 = 47]>>46768Rolling sense motive on Pony, Because Trumpaladin is a fucking Jedi with his sense motive
>>46770I killed 4 elephants! Even if Trumpaladin got gored twice and slammed, and Fae got slammed twice... for 68 and 37 damage respectively
[1d20 = 13]>>46776Thez' eyes narrow, and throw a darkened kunai next to the rod
>>46777>TRIPS>Natural 20>My ModifierI AM GOD. ALL THE PONY'S SECRETS SPILL OUT!
>>46779This should have been covered in the quick rundown. Who am i kidding, Thez is probably still a statue
>>46780You can instantly tell that she's not at all sorry for what she just did.
She's smirking a little bit too.
[minimum-sized pony noises]
"... At least I know what all of the buttons do now.."
[1d20+20 = 22][1d20+23 = 29]>>46782I KNOW YOUR SECRETS
>>46781At least Trumpaladin has no problems besides being two thirds dead
Spot and Listen check on Pony, since Fae has only eaten alive one small animal today. And fucking mauled to death two huge ones
>>46783You may want to stay quiet
>>46783No, in all the commotion Tracy would have had NO chance to mark the buttons.
[1d20+39 = 51]>>46784Hide check
>>46785Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
[1d20+23 = 24][1d20+20 = 30]>>46786You were heard, that's for sure
>>46786By your own description/admission, this was all done on the fly and in the heat of the moment. IDEK what happened, given all the buttons Tracy pushed.
>>46788She was
completely focused on the buttons, looking down at her hooves as she jumped up and down on them.
She did not care one bit what was going on around her.
[1d20 = 9]>>46789Fae has Track damn it! And she knows pony was near the rod
[1d20+23 = 31][1d20+20 = 26]>>46785Is succeeding on a listen check good enough for a grapple?
>>46791No. She is not moving.
>>46792She spoke a moment ago
DETECT EVIL
>>46789Denied. Please. Stop. For one fucking second. I'm not saying "you're restricted from doing anything ever", I'm saying I have no idea what all these fugging dice rolls mean. This gives me 3-ish options. 1. is let it play out, and see where it lands.
2. is stop it here, assess, and continue.
3. is nerf all this shit and go back to before Tracy started,... "acting".
>>46794But I killed Four summoned African Elephants...
That's probably better than Tracy being permanently changed colors or whatever the fuck she did though
>>46795You know, I'm sure she shot fireballs straight into the thick grass
WHERE IS YOUR COVER NOW!
>>46797She grew more grass.
>>46795You know what, no. Nevermind. Forget I said anything.
>>46798THAT ALSO BURNED!
Although there was rain as well. I'm really confused as to what happened
She probably also turned herself green
And then Permanently Blue
TRACY IS BLUE NOW!
[2d20 = 26]>>46799It returns to the status quo anyways, since none of these are permanent. Except color change. But let's ignore that
*heal check on self and Kitty*
A fine-sized voice emanates from an indeterminate direction:
"... If I come out now, will you be mad at me...?"
>>46801SELF STARTS TO HEAL!
Should cure serious wounds anyways, even though I'm sure that isn't enough
*kitty cures light wounds then falls the fuck asleep*
>>46802*puts kitty to sleep*
*NOW she decides to come out*
"For what?"
Trumpaladin is covered in blood and bandages, but is holding several full sized Tusks
>>46804"... I made a bit of a mess..."
"... That was pretty badass of you, fighting all of those pachyderms at once..."
>>46805Trumpaladin blushes at the compliment, then poses like a conquering Brit, with refined expression
"I fucking drove those endangered elephants to extinction"
\r
>>46806"I know, and it was
~sooo cool of you."
*humps proportionately colossal leg*
>>46807Tries to pose heroically. Like Pic related, but with a small blue probably invisible pony on his leg
>>46809>no peach rings*turns into monster to fly up onto shoulder*
*reverts to pony form, and sits on shoulder, also posing*
>>46810*Hair waves majestically in the wind*
>>46811*mane flows*
"..I love you, Flashy."
*kisses cheek*
>>46812*A cold fear goes down his spine*
>>46814*does not look at pony*
"You're small now. But you'll be gig again. Yuge, even. And..."
*beat*
"It's not that my hand was crushed at the exact moment I needed it. It's that I can never do that again without fear of...
I want to have a horse I can mess around with"
>>46813"...Is there something wrong, Flashy?" (aside from the obvious)
>>46816"yes..."
then dialogue in
>>46815 begins
>>46815>has no memory of crushing his hand"Well that won't do at all...."
*crawls down arm*
"Come on! Stick your pinkie in."
>>46818*still feels extremely awkward*
>>46819*sticks plot out*
*wiggles a little bit*
".. I'm ~waiting..!"
>>46820"This is... weird" he says to the Green statue of Thez
>>46821Isn't she an invisible green statue?
>>46822Yes. Yes she is. I think the green came after the invisible though
*sighs and sticks pinkie out*
>>46823You still have another Break Enchantment for the day, right?
It'd free her of transmutations
she might be mad though..>>46824*eases back onto pinkie*
".. Hnnng..! There..! Th-this isn't so scary now, i-is it?"
>>46825I had to use his second 4th level spell on cure serious wounds because an elephant got several good rolls against a not-fully armored Trumpaladin
*stares at the small horse making love to his pinkie*
>>46826Why U no Lay On Hands? It cures exactly the right amount.
>>46826*Makes sweet love to pinkie*
>>46827I hate using up spells. Lay of Hands is an awesome weapon against undead. Also I didn't think of that
>>46828*Stares in baffled fascination at tiny pony going at his pinkie*
>>46830I gotta stay in-character.
>>46830Kek
>>46831"I still don't know if I trust putting a penis in your larger form"
>>46832[strained mimi-pony noises]
She doesn't respond, but she's clearly trying her hardest to impress him.
>>46834Her motives are unclear.
>>46835*moves pony around like finger puppet on his pinkie*
>>46836[strained micro-pony noises]
*bounces*
>>46837*pets pony with index finger of other hand*
"I admit you're cute sometimes"
>>46829You could've also cast Heal Mount, fyi.
>>46838[happy micro-pony noises]
>>46839On Fae, yes. But for her I just had her cast heal light wounds on herself, do a basic heal check, and send her to sleep it off
>>46840*Wiggles pinkie*
"But I still don't feel comfortable"
>>46841*sad face*
"Well, I don't know what else I can do for you, Flashy..."
*crosses arms and pouts in frustration, adorably*
"..I wish I could help somehow.."
>>46842*sighes*
*grabs pony with other hand, and pumps her up and down on his pinkie, so that now she's just about in danger of being harmed by the pinkie*
>>46843[painedful moning]
"..A-Ah..! F-flashy..! N-not so fast!"
*writhes*
>>46844*slows down so as not to hurt pony*
>>46845*tears stream a bit, then cease*
[slightly-sore pony noises]
"Th-that's better.."
>>46846"That's how I cam feel with bigger you sometimes. Be careful"
>>46847"D-don't worry, F-flashy..! Your f-fingers are safe with me..!"
[1d20 = 7]
Fuck it. Cast dispel magic on pony
Caster check
>>46849strained expression
*nods*
[1d20 = 11][1d20 = 8][1d20 = 8]>>46852Pony should be full sized now
grab, pin, and penetrate pony with amazing modifiers
>>46851I made it less weird. It's just ordinary human on pony erotic role play now
>>46854Fucks pony
>>46851... Are you mad at me?
>>46858*sexual noises*
*humps pony*
"Oh hurry up already, I wanna beat on both of you." e_e
>tfw deserve to get plot kicked, but have to get up early to assist with a Manatee tour tomorrow
How do we fix Thez?
>>46858Trumpaladin says to pony
"I forgive you I guess"Not in words, but in semen
>>46862Try Dispel Magick
She we can use Break enchantment to un-green her tomorrow.
>tfw crimson sky will probably be over before she's fixed
Thez' feels/face when
[1d20 = 6]>>46860Boop
Dispel magic on green dwelf that got herself stoned
>>46866I don't know
It's Infernius's waifu, so he can have the honor if it doesn't
>>46865My bad, I realized it as soon as I posted
>>46868Cute
What's the seduction DC on Thez out of curiousity?
>>46868Cleaned-up a bit
I may've made it too green though..
>>46873It originally said "pls gib rod", but Trump's faggot immediately edited it to something a bit more appropriate...
>>46870>>46870It'n his caster level like 7 or 14?
>>46869I should ban myself for this post
>>46872Thats better. In fact, eyes should be greener still and darker, almost like a really dark jade.
AUTISM>>46874Thats,... not as exciting, but still funny
>>46875You start casting spells at lvl 5, so I think it's 12.
>>46875WIth a 6, he didn't beat the dood who made the rod. Thez-tue is still a thing, and Trump can't try again for 24 hours.
I gotta take care of see cattle tomorrow, so signing off for tonight.
>>46880Night you insufferable bastard who I'm gonna spend hours catching up on ur shenanigens
>>46880I have to move and complete a paper tomorrow likewise
>>46880>>46882Both of you, thank you and take care. Blessings of all the entities that witnessed you
not get blown up and triumph. Until next; shitposts, meta, and development only.
>>46613Me.
>>46883*boops thez*
*casts break enchantment*
>>46890Hitler trips are always nice
>>46893Yeah, but he still has to roll a caster level check. ^_~
Alright. Just that one facepalm by Thez resulted in the following effects which Infernius is now trying to remove:
Thez was turned into a statue, was covered with faerie fire, will be growing leaves for the next 24 hours, was then made ethereal, could then be detected thinking "WTF, SRSLY", and was then Enlarged.
Also, 2 hits of stinking cloud, Internius was made invisible again, a lightning bolt went off, a fireball, a darkness spell a little ways off. Oh and 3 hits of everyone is blind.
You can see how being blind might have modified the outcome a bit. You can see why I wanted players to wait before spastically running off and declaring action series after action series after action series and continuing on regardless of other players or me having the methodical chance to respond or act.
>>46895Trump and Fae didn't renter the room until an elephant was summoned by Tracy, and then hopefully stayed the hell away from the line of fire. The etherealness does not affect the wielder. It exclusively affects
non-living objects.
I like the timeline where Trumpaladin and Fae kill four African elephants better
>>46896Thez was made a statue. The only reason her thoughts were detected is because it happened at the same time.
>elephantsAlright, but that also means that Thez was still an ethereal statue and unable to stop Tracy
>>46897Touché
Stop Tracy from... Doing what?
>>46898There was a point where Thez stepped on Tracy, to pin her down; that never happened.
>>46899I think while that was happening while I was doing the gladiatorial combat. Tracy probably would have gotten a few more button mashes in before that finished, but when it would have, Fae would have been commanded to play Tom and Jerry with Tracy. Tracy's rampage would have ended instantly with a pounce and grapple, followed by an endless series of opposing grapple and escape artist checks until Tracy eventually both patrolled Fae on a grapple check and a spot check
>>46901Tracy would've only stopped after she'd pushed every button, and then stopped as soon as she came to her senses no longer having random buttons to experiment with.
The elephants we're a distraction, although Fae still would've had to beat Tracy's fine-sized Hide check.
That Stinking Cloud probably would've negated scent-searching.
>>46903>beat her fine sized hide checkWhen she escapes into the grass after winning a grapple check.
Not while she's bouncing up and down on a rod shooting out magic and shit. She'd be easy prey then
\r
>>46903And the blindness?
>>46905Wouldn't have stopped her from pressing all of the buttons, desu, but may have stopped her from being able to memorize buttons after that point.
>>46905Does blindness reduce the efficacy of escape artist checks?
>>46906Looking back at the record, Tracy would have had an additional two or possibly three rounds before Fae would have been able to pounce
>>46908>Does blindness reduce the efficacy of escape artist checks?According to da rules, just a -4 penalty, if any at all.
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:BlindedIt normally would've denied her her Dex bonus to AC, but Tracy also has Improved Uncanny Dodge, so she retains her Dex bonus even while flat footed and unable to see or hear her attacker.
She's a slippery little pony.
When the rod say that butterflies blind everyone, does that mean plp couldn't see through the butterflies, or the butterflies had some kind of magic/effect that blinded plp?
>mfw I just realized I should've been using Use Magick Device (ranks maxed-out) checks when activating the rod blindly
>>46876>greener still and darker, almost like a really dark jade.Like this?
>>46913Perfect
>>46910Its concealment like the dust cloud.
>>46914>PerfectNoted for the future.
I get all kinds of colors when I look up "jasper", but I knew it was a darkish blue-green.
>>46917... Infernius has a caster lvl of 17, right?
>>46917For kicks I rolled a live dice; it was a 2. In either case its a fail.
>>46909>That scary AF spoiled image that still startles me when I open itTom and Jerry would have been a fun game to play. Fae could first pounce with a touch attack. Tiny Tracy would have had a very high Touch AC because of dexterity and the small size, but Fae should still have succeeded with a 2 or higher. Then, Fae's +25 grapple against Tracy's +23 escape artist. If Fae won that check, Tracy would be held in Fae's mouth the next round. Fae could attempt a swallow that round, which is really just a grapple check. If Tracy won she'd be free but would be next to Fae and would have used her standard action to get free, meaning she couldn't hide and Fae could try to catch her again. If Fae won the swallow, then Tracy would be even more in a hold, and winning a grapple check after that would just return her to the mouth. Tracy should eventually win when she escapes into the Elephant grass and hides, since she'd probably win an opposed spot check thanks to insane modifiers. It would have been fun to play Tom and Jerry with the super slippery pony
Dragonnes don't have the "swallow whole"
special or "improved grapple," but I really don't see why the mechanics can't be applied to a monster who is three size classes larger than her opponent and using the standard grapple mechanicsI just realized while typing this that the game was far more in the cat's favor than the mouse, because escape artist consumes a standard action, meaning Tracy could run after succeeding but would just be pounced again and begin the process again; she wouldn't have time to hide and therefore win the game. Eh.\r
>>46925>>46924You can't just roll again
>>46923Oh well, next time. There's way too much autism to rewrite it now
>>46923Hide doesn't necessarily take so much time. You can do it as part of another action.
>>46926Why though.
Ok i bring statue thez back to the tower.
[1d20+20 = 33]
Rolling Use Magick Device to activate the rod blindly and press the right button for the Stone to Flesh affect on Thez.
It gets an additional +2 because Tracy's used the rod before.
>>46929The DC should be 25.
Was Tracy able to un-stone Thez?
>>46929>should be a 23 modifier, but I fucked up
>>46930>>46928Where
is Thez? She vanished shortly after being made a statue, and I don't mean invisible.
>>46932She counts as a non-living object?
Well fug...
I had an action earlier where Tracy became ethereal on her own volition, but that was deleted.
>>46926>tfw there's so much autism you've reached saturation and are unable to add more>>46927I see. So Tracy could have won. Still would have been fun
>>46932We'll get 'em next time
>>46933>REEEEEs in statue
>>46934>saturationHeat the solution.
>>46936Is there a bunsen burner I can place under this thread?
>>46932"Tracy this all your fault!"
"Gibe back rod, me go to find thez."
>>46937You mean other than the wonder rod?
>>46938>tfw to the party's best knowledge, Thez may have just teleported away.... Well, the first step would be for the party to figure out wtf just happened before and since Thez disappeared.
Someone open the the dialogue.
>>46938"It's not
ALL my fault. Thez was the first one to touch it."
Fuck!
Even if Tracy had a motivation to become Ethereal atm and immediately see Thez, wouldn't she still be invisible?
>>46939Oh that'd do it. It would take good luck to recreate the set though
>>46941"Sadly that's true. You go playing around with wonderous powers bad things can happen. Anyways, we can try again when the wizard gets here or tomorrow"
Where is the party right now anyway?
>>46942The party has gone much longer periods without Thez. Much longer. It can wait a day
>>46944Last I knew, on the deck of the airship.
>>46944Still in the dungeon i guess.
>>46945Reeeeeeee
>>46947No, I lost track at the airship, which is still possible despite Tracy's shenanigens.
>>46948Where was staue thez at? Thats where infernuis is.
[1d20 = 18]>>46948>>46946What? No. Why would they be on the airship? They are in the Tower probably
>>46951Bitch slap pony
>>46950For the sake of continuity, let's assume Infernius just came out of the toilet in the next room.
>>46950"Hey, I killed four African Elephants! FOUR! Fae helped. Also Tracy turned your waifu into a green statue and disappeared her or something. I'm not really clear on what happened"
>>46952>Why would they be on the airship?They were transporting the loot to the tower.
>>46955Actually, no green; I went over the rolls twice and she missed the green roll (but got statue'd)
>>46955>Tracy turned your waifu into a green statue and disappeared her or something. I'm not really clear on what happenedWrong.
Thez did that to herself.
And the first thing that happened was her turning invisible, so there's no way for them to know what else happened to her.
>>46956I did not have the airship in mind. Anyays, the airship is too small for Jumaji shit like what went down
>>46950>>46957"Oh Thank God! She dodged the green bullet"
>>46958Eh. I'm not really clear on what happened
\r
>>46957>no greenOh, thank Elway not that.
>>46959The airship is like a smallish cruise ship.
>>46957It doesnt matter to Infernuis what color she is. She's an honorary aryan no matter what.
>>46955"Pls help get rod back from hores so me can find thez."
>>46958Also not true, the first thing that happened was she was turned into a statue (well, the
first thing that happened is everyone was blinded, the statue was #2). The invis was Infernius, cuz he was the one holding the rod (he's still invisible btw).
>>46962"Alright"
>>46961"Tracy... Give the rod back to Infernius"
>>46963>first thing that happened is everyone was blindedFuck. That makes it moar difficult.
>>46964>>46962"B-b-b-but.. I love this Rod..!"
>>46966"But Infernius Loves Thez more than you love, well, basically anything. Even more than you love being a pain in the ass for the rest of us, and that's saying a lot. Unless you want it literally taken from your dead body, you should give it back to him"
[1d20+23 = 35]
She used that Ethereal button a couple times since Thez, but she would've only been able to target the grass.
"Let's get rid off all this goddamn salad getting in way first."
Rolling Use Magick Device to press the button to make the Grass disappear across the room, because that's what she thinks it does.
>>46968*walks across room, making grass disappear ghostly as she does*
By the way, I would like players to make a choice.
Purple, Red, Light-Green, Blue, Dark-Green, Light-Blue.
First come first serve.
>>46968You would need a 45 on a perception check to detect a single blade of grass disappearing in correlation with the rod. Sorry, but roll a 20.
>>46971>>46972K. If you're wondering, its cuz I weight-tested my live dice and I picked the sets with the best weight. Those dice will hence be wrt that player.
[1d20 = 20]
*prays for natural 20*
>>46977YES!
Tracy goes about the room repeatedly flicking the button with intent to make all of the generated objects disappear.
>>46978god dammitCarry on
>>46978"No! Fuck You! This is MY ivory!"
[1d20+22 = 27]>>46978Grabs rod from pony
>>46980You are carrying the ivory.
*continues to make junk disappear, walking all across the room as she does*
>>46980"C- can me have enough to carve ring"
[1d20+22 = 24]>>46983"Oh we've got plenty"
>>46982Grabs the rod
>>46983"And here's the rod"
*hands rod*
>>46997
That is a perfectly plausible and incorrect theory
>>46999
Of course she would've undone it immediately.
>>47002She's ethereal, petrified, and invisible to boot. Nobody knows what happened to her.
... Well fug..
... Miracle..? It can reverse/halt catastrophes; and I think this counts as one.
>>47002>>47003>>47000For Fuck's Sake, just ask Lenos
>>47005... That might work..
>>47004She's not invisibleShe's petrified, enlarged, and has faerie fire cast on her.
Also, one generally has to be able to point toward the catastrophe. The power of christ needs something to compel.
... on the ethereal plane
>>47007Considering the mess, the entire room could count as the catastrophe...
I guess it's a little too Deus Ex Machina..
>>47007>>47008>>47009>>47010If only there were someone who knew what a rod of wonder was.A person of Incredible magical ability. So magical in fact, that he had a rod of wonder of his own, except he actually knows how to fucking use it. He even has the buttons marked, like one to summon a stream of cats. A Mystic Theurgist perhaps. And if only such a person were constantly available in the tower.
Oh well. Thez is fucked
>>47021
Yeah exactly. Fuck ethereal jaunt to steal shit
You can
1. Ask lenos
2. Point the rod in the direction of Thez and press buttons as a "try everything" to undo it
>>47022>2. Point the rod in the direction of Thez and press buttons as a "try everything" to undo itGM already said that wouldn't work.
The party needs to be aware that Thez is ethrereal so that Infernius can juant to her and cast Break Enchantment.
Infernuis flies to the tower and looks for lennos.
Is lennos faggot here?
>>47025Give me a reason there would be no attempt to ask a wizard or sorcerer what the rod does. Give me one solid reason. One solid reason
>>47026Lenos's faggot just got here im lost whats going on
>>46970Dark-green
What do I win?
>>47056Drama. Just ignore it
They were fucking around with a rod of wonder and got Thez ethereal invisible green and petrified. Now they can't get her back
>>47056"We found a rod of wonder"
>>47056Hell
Torc died once, we killed a bunnch of mummys, a rod of wonder went batshit, and Trump and Tracy's faggots are fighting again
>>47060So we wonder what it does or why we use it?
>>47056Currently, Thez is on the airship, petrified, enlarged and ethereal due to activating several effects of a Rod of wonder activating on herself at once. None of the other characters are aware of what happened to her, other than that she suddenly disappeared (could've just dimensional-doored for all they know).
The room fucking stinks and there's tall grass, dead elephants, butterflies, scorch marks, and a whole other list of bullcrap generated by the rod having been activated more than a hundred times since Tez disappeared in an attempt to figure out what all the buttons do.
>>47061>>47061Techinally Thez and Tracy went batshit with the rod of wonder, but yes
\r
>>47062Sorry couldnt help making a pun
>>47062Tracy has discovered what about half of the buttons do after a psychopathic rampage, but nobody knows what happened to Thez, so they can't even begin to think of how to fix her, since they don't even know where she is.
>>47065So yeah, get Thez back. She seems to have pressed every button. Or many of them at least
>>47067We need to know what happened to Thez, and if she's even present first.
I believe lebos was last seen drinking on the airship correct?
>>47063"Fuck this shit. I'm retreating with my snek to the airship."
Torc finds his way
somehow to the airship
>>47068There's just no way at all to even know what happened to her. The best we could hope for is just to present the object to her and say "Thez is missing and this thing did it"
>>47074Uh, the airship?
I guess the top deck
>>47075
Apparently not allowed.
How do (YOU) suppose we fix Thez then?
>>47078How would he know what's going on?
>>47079How would the players? Just say "a bunch of things happened to Thez because of this rod and I was out of the room when it happened but she doesn't seem to be there anymore. Do you know what this thing is, what it did, and how it might be reversed?"
>>47079Cuz he's got a similar rod desu
>>47085Its the same rod that filled the tower with Kittens at one point
>>47087Not endorsing, or even tacitly accepting, but consider it a presidential line-item veto?
>>47076I thought you meant to pilot somewhere.
>>47090>pic related
>>47090
>personal
Thyat's exactly what makes it so petty.
I've seen plenty of about 4chan janitors acting like narcissistic, egotistical kikes because it was the only degree of control or security they had over anything in their lives, but you perform above and beyond the stereotype.
>>47092Okay, we get it
You hate me
I hate you
Now can we get back to the situation at hand?
>>47092>>47093I hate all of you to a certain degree, there's nothing unhealthy about that.
>>47091Nah, just wanted to go to check for damage
>>47095The second cannon is shot,... literally. The chain-mechanism should be disengaged before the whole place blows up. Other than that, the ship has sustained no damage and everything is normal.
>>47094Same. Infernius and his faggot are definatrly the hardest to hate though
>>47100I heard before you didn't like that Korak fellow. Can you tell us a little about that?
[1d20+18 = 29]>>47096Chain? You mean the one that fires the cannons?
Engineering check for how the hell to do that
>>47098>returns favor>>47101As the one who killed him, I would like too know more.
>>47101The bastard shot me once
>>47103And then ran a2ay before i could return his bullet
I need to go friends meatspace calls.
>>47102That'll do, its just a relay-pin to disconnect a cannon. Easy fix. 13 cannons operational, and 1 volley with an extra round. 3 shots remain in the forward cannons.
>>47102Do you think you could fix the cannon? GM tipped his hand in suggesting they were of gnomish manufacture. I think we could acquire projectiles from there
>>47103>>47104Only once? I'm not sure if that's enough
In fairness, when a player shot me, I had him mauled to death, and then stole his sort of girl friend
Which was kind of an extreme overreaction on my part
>>47093That's beside the point, goddammit!
You take everything so personal that you're willing to stoop to any level to make yourself feel good in the end; that is what I hate about you. You're a narcisistic control freak who gets bent out of shape about rules that don't even exist, because it makes you feel like you've lost some kind of battle.
To be honest, other than your insistence on getting in the way of posters's playing/shitposting, I really don't hate you at all, Anon; in fact, I really don't care one bit, Anon. You're tendency to take everything so personally that you have to use outside influence to interfere with board traffic on the basis of what is (((fair))) is what I find unacceptable though. As long as I'm allowed to play/shitpost how I please, I really wouldn't have the time to bother hating you at all, but your silly insistence on always being in control of of
everything always brings all the attention back to
you. I'm not angry nearly as much as I am frustrated: I will not be told how to shitpost.
>can we get back to the situation at hand?I don't know. Can my character go back to doing what she's able to do within the established rules of The Game, or do I have to ask for your permission for everything before I do it?
>>47097Infernius is impossible to hate. He really is adorable.
>>47107You do realize what I am right
>>47104Kek
>>47105Au revoir, faguette
>>47106Are they standard or magic cannonballs?
Also, could lenos make another gun or should Torc visit the gnomes again?
>>47107Especially since it was a shitpost
>>47108>All this spergingTake your medication anon
>>47109Chaotic Neutral?
>>47111Well that and other things
It seems we can't make any progress then.
\r
>>47113I believe it
>>47114Not until you take your autism pills
>>47115You should take some pills for your chronic anal retention.
>>47108>control freakThe makings of a great GM desu
>>47110They's precise rounds. They're fired from cannons, but they look more like what (you) recognize as the actual round from a bullet except huge and without powder/brass
>>47117D'aww thanks
>>47116MY ANUS IS FINE THANK YOU
>>47117>Without Powder/brassSounds like the guns Torcuil got from Korak\r
*drinks glass of water*
\r
>>47119>like Torcuil's gunsNo, the cannon's powder rounds are mini-keg-sized and are loaded into the cannon separately. That's how they can breach the pyramid, they use a volume of powder about 16/1 "normal" cannons and the rounds are specific to not explode (normally) in the barrel.
*scratches back with stick*
\r
>>47122So it functions like a battleship?
>>47117Kinda like AP round style? Whats the composition?
>>47122So HE rounds?
>>47125I think we now know what to do with the money
>>47113Hey can Lenos de-fuck the Thez situation?
>>47126Boy I enjoy being a captain
>>47122HEIAP?
>>47129Okay, how the fuck do
you get a +23 on use magic device?
>>47131Just let me put my Marines on it is all I ask
>Not Space Marines (yet), but Air Marines
>>4713119 ranks in it (Rogue and Assassin), +1 Int bonus, +2 because she's used the rod before.
>>47132Thats fine, Torc would be willing to help transport.
GM, can Torc study under the Gnomes to learn some of their craftsmanship?
>>47128 i might be able to find her
>>47131>HEIAPMore like "DAFUQ"
>>47133She was tiny, spastic, and unsanctioned at the time. I'm denying any viable recollection of button placement.
>>47134Who gave Tracy back the rod? Invalid roll.
>>47137Probably not, but I'll try and think of something.
>>47139Again,
no
>>47141When was it taken from her?
>>47142Alright.
Do, where are the characters atm? Including Tracy, because idk where she's allowed to go without getting b8.
>>47141>sighHE: High explosive rounds
AP: Armor peicing
HEIAP: High explosive incendiary/armor peircing
>>47141>probally notMaybe just able to mantain Gnomish works, but not reproduce them?
*casts discern location to attempt to find thez*
>>47145"Any idea what could've happened to her?"
>>47138Excellent
"She was last seen on the deck of the airship after falling over a rod that is similar to a one you possess. I fled the room when that happened, so I can't say what happened to her, and I don't know if she was teleported or vaporized or what have you, but they want her back. Attempts at dispel magic have failed to break the caster level"
>>47142It's not your haxx item. Not everything belongs to you and you can't steal everything
*casts discern location to attempt to find thez*
>>47142Hard to say. She's pushed so many buttons who knows what's happened to her or her surroundings.
>>47145>>47148She's a statue on the ethereal plane.
>>47150did the rod go with her?
>>47151No, it remained and was pushed repeatedly by a different player afterwards
And how is anyone else supposed to know my intentions if you delet every comment I make?
If I can't juant, and I can't try to figure out the rod's functions, what am I allowed to do to contribute to the situation, without offending you in some way?
Well fuck it.
Tracy flies off to another side of the continent, because anything she could do here is prohibited.
>>47154She's prohibited from flying though
>>47154>inb4 deleted for flying
[1d20+23 = 42]
Rolling first to Hide
[1d20+23 = 32]>>47158To Sneak away.
>>47159And she's off, without a word.
Equip Horseshoes of Zepher to avoid leaving tracks.
So, can Lenos fix the cannon?
[1d20 = 7]>>47162Rolling to fix cannon
[1d20+26 = 38]>>47159>>47158Fae: Spot Check
>>47163Aww
>>47162Well, than I guess the ship is making a trip to thenameoftheplacethegnomesliveandIcan'tremember. Who's coming?
>>47163I don't think thats a 20
>>47165Don't we have a dungeon that needs crawling?
>>47166Torc already died once there, he can go die again another day
lenos's faggot is dealing with a nasty migraine and cant look at the screen anylonger so he will hand control back to the gm for the time being so that maybe shit can happen
>>47168Ugh, sorry to hear that. See you later
>>47162How the fuck do you "accidentally" blind activate a magical device to a specific function?
>>47168In a not dissimilar manner, GM begins stacking his books and sorting his paper-stack after about 2 weeks of off-and-on, unrestricted gaming.
The story is a little bit knotted and will need to be untied at some point, but there will be all week for that as we resume a
sane more consistent schedule. I'm not leaving yet, but I just cracked my last beer.
>>47170 With a 20 unfortunately.
\r
>>47171I'm calling bullshit
"You must consciously choose which requirement to emulate. That is, you must know what you are trying to emulate when you make a Use Magic Device check for that purpose."
And since when are skill checks able to be done in attacks of opportunity?
I suggest taking time to categorize/itemize acquisitions (loot), resources (loot+), and abilities (lvl+).
>>47172Don't worry, he's grossly over-estimating Tracy's comprehesion of which button does what, and I haven't yet brought in the extended chart. One roll won't be too bad.
>>47173Without Lenos being here, can I get a Lenos-check on the half-plate armor?
And the Robe?
And the Potion?
And the scroll?
>>47173Also, I know there's not really a way I can make this seem sincere, but sorry for causing so much shit
The Scroll is Confusion CL 7th
The Potion is Displacement
There are three goats remaining.
The Tome is Understanding +3
Staff of Abjuration (prev. fight)
Orb of Storms (p.f.)
Magnificent Half-Plate +4 (+3 Cha)
Cloak of Resistence +2
Ring of Fire Resistance +10
Brooch of Shielding
I know that many are redundant, but there are lots of items that are unused/unexamined. Thank you for Tracy using the sword-wind, it makes for great sea-battles too (wind sails and all).
>>47176I'd like to take the half plate and offer the +19 spell resistance full plate to Infernius
>The scroll really is of confusionLol
>>47176What does my long horned goat do?
>>47175I forgive you ya little shit
>>47176>armor is Charisma>Torc can't wear armorEnd my suffering
I'll take that potion though. Could prove useful.
Spellcraft check for staffs spells?
[1d20+18 = 25]>>47180I made the right fucking choice then
WARNING: Toxic levels of Blogpost
"Mrs. Sentry" is going to have to go on maternity leave for quite a while, as her faggot sorts out the remainder of his life.
Tracy's birds are in their personal room with a lifetime's supply of dried elephant meat. Please walk/fly them, even if they're just imaginary..
I'm sorry guys, but I've been putting this off for a while now.. I've had a great time playing with all of you, and I would've liked to act-out and imagine Tracy's baby; but I've got some important things to do that will make my current daily schedule/lifestyle impossible.
Trump's faggot please perma-ban this IP, from all boards. I know I'll come crawling back later, but I can't afford to be distracted by irresistible nazi-ponies, before this body fails me...
....
*contemplates deleting whole comment and going back to playing*
>>47182I'm sorry to you as well
>>47182See you later friend, I'll miss you until you return.
It was fun, thanks for putting up with our autism.
>>47182Thank you for contributing your time, intention, ingenuity, autism, and loads of other elements for all this time. If this venture has in any way led to dysfunction - and I say that without judgement - I apologize. I hope you are more creative and tenacious now than you were when we started.
>>47182>>47185Fuck, now I'm realy fucking sad.
I'm... I'm gonna come back to this in the morning.
Tracy's faggot before you go, I just want you to know it was great fun to play with you. You'll always be one of the ones that gave me my first d&d experience, and I thank you for that. I hope you can sort out what you need too, and return sometime even if it's just to say hi and talk a bit.
>>47186"I,... knew it was inevitable. You've all been so accommodating, you don't even know. I've been waiting for a white flag for some time. No criticism, I knew it could never be maintained indefinitely."
>>47188Again, I'm sorry. I know it's me specifically. I figured one of us would eventually drive the other away
>>47190No, I don't think it was you. I think it was circumstances outside his control, and it just happened to occur after you two bickered a bit. Don't blame yourself, it won't help.
>>47189 ikr?>>47190https://youtu.be/YDC54WgO0ywI doubt players are a/the issue. I hope not at least. In any case, this thread has another 700 posts before molding over. Players are still permitted and I will continue to monitor, but a re-evaluation is in order desu.
>>47177Thank you.
>>47182I will sincerely miss you, i teard up reading your blog-post. I've had fun with you and tracy over the last few months. I wish you well and when you get your life back on track come back and post okay? Infernuis is be heartbroken.