/vx/ - Videogames and Paranormal


If you want to see the latest posts from all boards in a convenient way please check out /overboard/

Name
Email
Subject
By clicking New Reply, I acknowledge the existence of the Israeli nuclear arsenal.
Comment
0
Select File / Oekaki
File(s)
Password (For file and/or post deletion.)

img-2048973-1-epic-mlp-with-resolution-1550917.jpg
Super Lazy Nuts
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34464
This is the Nuts thread. Its based on D&D 3.5e rules,... but only loosely, and only as a baseline. It's really an anything goes free-for-all, continuous RP thread. If ur interested, say "Hi" or announce yourself and GM or participants will be happy to assist. In the meantime, much of the party just jumped into the Ethereal Plane to murder some shit, cuz why not? We haven't killed anything (well Thez has) in like 3-4 days now (real-time, not game time) and like I said, why not?
845 replies and 58 files omitted.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34880
>>34878
kek
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34881
34884
>>34877
Or on fire,....
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34882
34883
>>34877
They can dismount

>>34878
Fucking Torcuil and his pet fucking things up for us

"That was Torcuil damn it! He attacked! I, by contrast, never break a convanent. I would never do as he did.

After all, you all are so much more valuable to me alive"
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34883
34885 34889
>>34882
>dismount
Sure, but to Sneak Attack something by herself, wouldn't she have to leave him alone at a distance, which she wouldn't do..


Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34884
34888
>>34881
She can turn into a heavy warhorse too with a Control Shape check, can't she?
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34885
34886
>>34883
They can be on either side of a road as bandits approach, Trump in the open in the front and her sneaking up on the flank
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34886
34889
>>34885
... maybe..

Will we have time to get to any combat tomorrow?
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34887
It's late. I'm going to bed.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34888
34890
>>34884
Do you mean while mounted?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34889
>>34883
Technically, she just has to be behind them or striking from concealment
>>34886
Yes

Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34890
34893
>>34888
I don't see why not.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34892
34894
>>34891
Does she need a Concentration check?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34893
34895
>>34890
Sorry, but I do. 'Night
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34894
34896
>>34892
Every round?
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34895
>>34893
Am of confused
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34896
34897
>>34894
To assume hybrid shape. Does Control Shape require a check every round?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34897
34898 34899
>>34896
If you're mounted, which was what we agreed turns her into a cauchemar entirely, yes.
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34898
34901
>>34897
Oh, so she has to stay in monstrous form while mounted? It doesn't just require a Control Shape check to evade involuntary transformation?
Alright then, noted for the future.
Also, to fake death, does that require a Bluff check or a perform check?
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34899
>>34897
>>34897
But if she stops smoking and flaming, she just looks like a dark blue Shire plow horse in a weird amount of black leather, right?
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34900
I'm sorry. I can't meta any longer. Passing out.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34901
34902 34903
>>34898
Pick your poison, either one could be put to the dice.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34902
34904 34905
>>34901
Why would Thez have intervened to save Torcuil, but she didn't give a shit when he shot me, and a while ago, when I asked Thez "can you please stop Torcuil from coming to kill me" she basically responded "don't be afraid of death you coward"?
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34903
34905
>>34901
Can a player make itself appear dead with a bluff check.
I was exhausted, so I had the shitty idea to use her +19 Bluff check to play possum, since a nightmare's flames go out when it dies. It's a retarded idea. I need to sleep...
Can her glasses create an illusion that overshadows the illumination affect?
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34904
>>34902
It was a good shot.
There was little time to intervene anyway. Drawing the gun is a free action with those cuff-links.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34905
34906
>>34902
Because I told you, it didn't harm you, it just stung.
>coward
Thez is a shitposter
>>34903
Sleep, I'll think on it.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34906
34907
>>34905
You said before that Tracy can control the smoke and flames at will right?
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34907
34909 34910
>>34906
Being mounted turns her into +1600 pounds of pure sex; she'd have to roll every turn to avoid involuntary transformation, like a werewolf, apparently.
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34908
Alright, now I'm absolutely going to bed.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34909
34910 34911 34912
>>34907
Think of it as an involuntary response to being so close to Flashy Kun, since you keep insisting on that e_6
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34910
>>34907
>+1600 pounds of pure sex
Okay, that made me laugh for a solid minute. I remember going through the old threads and seeing "1200 pounds of pure sex" and that was hilarious as well

>>34909
So can she not turn fire and smoke off while riding her?
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34911
34912 34914
>>34909
A psychosomatic change seems appropriate. It implies that she has the latent power to take that form, but just doesn't have any idea how to use it unless she's in the mood.
>Didn't sleep
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34912
34913 34914
>>34909
>>34911
A Paladin's mount gives god tier buffs, so I'm going with "Elway stepped in to channel and maybe add power so she can be full form"
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34913
34914 34915
>>34912
You're implying that a Divegrass playing Fiend is channeling football energy? Nah, i'd say it's just that she discovers the necessary excitement to attain a complete transformation.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34914
>>34911 IKR
>>34912 This
>>34913 Both


Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34915
34916 34918
>>34913
Hardly. Tracy is an evil of the sort that needs to be either Destroyed or in someway harnessed and controlled. Destruction was not possible or at least not desirable under the circumstances, so a creative method of harnessing is used - make her a paldin's mount, which makes full use of the Jew powers and adds in Elway powers as well
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34916
34917
>>34915
Gasp! The power to harness the jew!
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34917
151025111221-trump-thumbs-up-1021-full-169.jpg
>>34916
It's a pretty Kick Ass deity
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34918
34919
>>34915
>Jew powers
It wasn't all Jewish power. Half of that was Thez's blood too. I made a point of having her take both beakers so she would be neither lawful nor Chaotic from it (because nightmares are neutral), and instead find her create her own form of ebil.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34919
34920 34921
7de.gif
>>34918
You mean the powers Thez got from that psycho uber-feminist? So you have jew powers and feminist powers?
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34920
34921 34922
>>34919
>Uber-feminist
Wat?

Are there any other fiends Tracy can eat? They can't all be Jewish.
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34921
34922 34923
>>34919
>>34920
What kind of powers does feminism give you?
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34922
34923 34924
>>34920
Thez's devil sire was the Golden Lady, who is a bitch so feminist she could work in Hollywood. When you take Thez's demon powers, you are taking the Golden Lady's demon powers

>>34921
You tell me
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34923
>>34922
*devil
>>34921
Not all devils and fiends are feminists and jews, these ones happen to be.
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34924
34925
>>34922
What about her was feminist? She just seemed like the kind of high-and-mighty, condescending sort of character you'd expect from a literal god.
>You tell me
Alright
*Throws him off her back*
*Sits on*
We on top nao
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34925
34926
>>34924
My Character and Infernius had a very long conversation with Thez that you were not present for that explained the Golden Lady

Bad pony
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34926
34927 34928 34930
If she has Jew power, can she smell gold and weasle out of tipping at restaurants?
>>34925
>you were not present for
Quick rundown?

*Butt obscures world*
*Tears off shoes and pants*
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34927
34928 34929
>>34926
>inb4 >rape
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34928
34929 34930
>>34926
"Be gentle with those damn it!"

I asked a large number of questions about why the Golden Lady paralyzed Torcuil, Infernius and I, while Tracy and Tay were ignored. The answer was something along the lines of those two responding in a particularly "feminine" form of defiance that she wanted to hear while I attempted to talk my way out and Torcuil and Infernius, while defiant, weren't defiant in quite the right way. She said that in general the golden lady is a sort of upholder of that which is feminine, I guess in the lawful evil sense

>>34927
If i can call a mount I can deflate a mount right?

Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34929
34932
>>34927
It'll only be that way if he has the gall to resist, but yes.

I'm too exhausted to type it out though. Whatever happened, she sat on him the whole time.
>>34928
>Deflate
He'd still have a 1200-1400 pound warhorse on his face, and this position could arguably count as mounted, from a psychosomatic perspective (it's all in her head, after all).
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34930
34931 34932
>>34926
Seriously though, Trump is in full plate, and Tracy is sitting on him. Its not as simple as declaring 'ripping his pants off'.
>>34928
>deflate
As in dismiss? No.
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34931
34933
>>34930
She can use her jaws to tear things off, can't she?
She could at least open the armor hatch (all medieval suits of armor have one) for easy access.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34932
34933 34934
>>34929
>it's all in her head, after all
No it ain't. A Paladin's mount is a gift from the deity to help him in his quest

>Whatever happened, she sat on him the whole time
Like what could she do?

>>34930
I can't dismiss a mount?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34933
34934 34935
>>34931
>hatch
Yes, but there's Korak's pimp suit to contend with in that event.
>>34932
Not a player mount, no
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34934
34935 34937
69
>>34932
I remember at least four verses that included having secks with horses as part of the "Quest".
>>34933
... Hypothetically could the Pimp suit be repaired?
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34935
34936 34937
>>34933
What do I have to roll to get myself out of this? An opposed grapple check? An attack of opportunity? Can I put the helm on?

>>34934
Oh don't you dare damage that pimp suit you faggot!
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34936
34938
>>34935
She's got both his arms, torso, and head pinned under her Yuge-class butt.
..You wanted to see the feminist powers in action...
*Refrains from ripping through suit*
*Carefully unbuttons*
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34937
34940 34941 34942
>>34934
The pimp suit exceeds anyone's current ability to modify or repair.
>>34935
Technically, the whole thing is contestable since no dice have been rolled yet.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34938
34939
>>34936
I think she's too big for a successful 69
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34939
34942
>>34938
Long neck, high dexterity.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34940
34941
>>34937
Oh well then he sure as shit better not damage it if we can't even find a tailor for it
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34941
34943
>>34937
>>34940
It can't be tailored? Wasn't it originally made to fit a Dwarf?
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34942
34944 34945
>>34937
GM, is >>34939 accurate and Cauchemar tracy could at once sit on a guy's torso but also suck him off?

Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34943
34944
>>34941
I would think a Paladin's mend spell could do something
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34944
34945 34946
>>34942
Ever seen a horse sit? She could reach.
He should focus on his part, because he's not moving until she's happy.
>>34943
I thought that only worked on non-magical objects?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34945
34946
>>34942
You seriously want a ruling. Thats not a question, I'm marveling. Since you asked, I wonder if he can stick his head up innit.
>>34944
>reach
You're not helping
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34946
34947 34949
1507355229015.gif
>>34944
....I don't like oral sex

>>34945
That was a legit question because I have no idea
Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34947
34948
>>34946
Neither do I. This is feminism.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34948
34950
>>34947
No feminism! Do it the way God intended - with the semen in the horse vagina. She can be on top if she wants
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34949
>>34946
Logistically speaking, yes, she could reach.
I gotta crash, catch you guys later

Anonymous
NBd4A
?
No.34950
34951
>>34948
Alright, you sexist, bigot.
*Turns around and does whatever until her faggot recovers from hibernation, pinning him the whole time*

Goodnight
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.34951
35046
>>34950
*Is milked by demon horse*
NBd4A
?
No.34954
>*is sat on until passed out*
>*wakes up the next morning in camp*
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34955
34956
>>34820
Can I get an answer to that multi-weapon fighting feat?
I want to impale targets three times at once.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34956
34958
>>34955
Yes, while it doesn't afford any additional attacks/round, it could enable a simultaneous triple-stab sneak attack.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34957
9c822fda313f2a6c62e8f1c75abdc40c.jpg
DFWAdRCUIAAQnhQ.jpg
sneakattack.jpg
a68a11af2ffde9777f09feb35464532b.jpg
dd-meme-why-do-rogues-prefer-leather-armor.jpg

Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34958
34959
1779339_0.jpg
>>34956
>triple-stab sneak attack
That's all I needed.
Can I make a Triple Death Attack too?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34959
34960
>>34958
As long as the victim is studied for 3 rounds before performing the 3x, the sneak attack (so damage) can also be a death attack (save or die).
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34960
34961
>>34959
Does a Death Attack stack with a sneak attack? Do targets still take sneak attack damage if they succeed their saving throws?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34961
34962 34966
>>34960
It can, yes. Sneak attack by its self is easier to do, but sneak/death attack is perfectly permissible.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34962
34963 34964
Dnd_696697_6026462.jpg
>>34961
Great.
For the sake of range estimate, what kind of monster (hit-dice wise) can she one-shot with a good sneak attack at her level? I just want to figure out what I can hope will die on the first strike.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34963
stealth-funny-motivational-poster.jpg
>>34962
Wrong meme.
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.34964
>>34962
A level 12 rogue can deal 6d6, or about 21 additional damage with a sneak attack. If all three strikes land, that's 63 damage. So you could kill a Torcuil, for example
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34965
34972
bearhunting.jpg
Also, can she go hunting in the morning during the time Trumpaladin is asleep in the cuckshed she built overnight?
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.34966
34971
>>34961
Why would Tracy have three attacks per round? A level 12 rogue only has 2 attacks per round
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34967
34969 34971
Tracy is 1 Blackguard, 1 Assassin, and 14 Rogue yes?
Assuming all three hit it would be: [A+B+C weapon damage (including bonuses)]+45d6, in that each attack (weapon) is a separate sneak attack, gaining the 15d6 damage off the weapon's specific damage.
So lots.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.34968
34971
>>34783
tries not to get erect... fails.
>>34772
>>34788
where is infernuis on the list?
>>34785
this.
>>34787
i do.
>>34786
its in my backstory queer.
>>34796
dont feel so down, this is the song i think of when it comes to tracy.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mdpt4W7_XNg
>>34810
this.
>>34819
what scimitar?
>>34822
i said i give an infernuis stunner (like stone cold.)
>>34838
if you murder any of my men we will have an issue.


Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.34969
34970
>>34967
Now where the hell do those numbers come from? The wiki says
The rogue’s attack deals extra damage any time her target would be denied a Dexterity bonus to AC (whether the target actually has a Dexterity bonus or not), or when the rogue flanks her target. This extra damage is 1d6 at 1st level, and it increases by 1d6 every two rogue levels thereafter. Should the rogue score a critical hit with a sneak attack, this extra damage is not multiplied.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34970
34971
>>34969
Excuse me, I used the wrong multiples. Yes, it would be 24d6, not 45d
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34971
34974
>>34966
Ponies mouths count as hands for the purpose of holding tools.
The multi-weapon fighting feat allows for characters with three or more "hands" to hold an equal number of weapons without penalty.
>>34967
I think I'll only advance her as a Rogue from now on.. I wanted Aura of Despair, but I think she'll be better off getting to ebin level first, so she can get one of those ebin bonus feats.
>>34968
She'll only murder pirates who cause trouble, alright? She won't touch anyone who might be missed.
>where is Infernuis on the list?
not telling (also, I threw away the key to the point system)I really like your character though
>>34970
How much damage is that per turn?
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34972
34974
>>34965
Like what kind of game is there in the forest?
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34973
34975
What's Trumpaladin's base attack bonus?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34974
34976 34977
>>34971
That would depend on the weapons used (must be piercing), but its that's an increased damage of + 24<x<144 over the modified damage all the combined weapons,... so yeah, murder.
>>34972
There's game. You can hunt if you want, but I'm not gonna do full combat for it. Roll a survival check to catch something.
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.34975
34977
>>34973
16 11 6 1
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.34976
34978
>>34974
I think you're including the assassin and blackguard levels into it, when only the rogue levels count. It should be 7d6 per attack that lands, for 21d6 if all three land. Also, does she have 12 ranks in rogue and 3 in blackguard or 14 ranks in rogue and 1 in black guard?
NBd4A
?
No.34977
34979 34980
[1d20+19 = 30]
>>34974
*duct-tapes snoring Trumpaladin to back*
Rolling survival
>>34975
Is the cumulative the "base"? Or is it just 16 as the base?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34978
34981
>>34976
No, assassin also gets sneak damage dice, which expressly stack with rogue sneak.
>levels
That's my one question. I don't remember which.
NBd4A
?
No.34979
[1d20+20 = 30]
>>34977
Also, Move Silently, so he doesn't wake up.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34980
34982
>>34977
16 is the base, and each additional attack gets 5 less for bonus
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34981
>>34978
>levels
Now I'm confused too..
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34982
34983 34986 34987
>>34980
Epic prestige classes like Divine Emissary require a 23 base attack bonus. How does one attain that if their attack bonus doesn't increase after 20th level?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34983
34986 34987
>>34982
Epic BAB increases by 1 every 2 levels.
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.34984
34985
image.png
>Is the least liked character here
*sad blackguard noises...*
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34985
34989
>>34984
That's not true, the least-liked character has been starving for days in a body-cast.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.34986
34987 34990 34994
>>34982
>>34983
i want to be a divine emissary.

Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34987
34989 34990
>>34982
I want to figure this out, so I can decide weather or not to advance as a Rogue to become a Perfect Wight, or as a Blackguard/Assassin to get other cool stuff.
>>34983
So, a paladin/Cleric/blackguard would have to be level 26 to become a Divine Emissary?
>>34986
Get weapon focus in that Fash-axe. You get automatic proficiency in it since Hitler is a war god, not to mention that Minotaur's also get proficiency in battleaxes.
jStTv
?
No.34988
35004
*wakes up and starts tearing the shit off of him to get off the horse's back*
\r
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.34989
34991
>>34985
>>34987
how long would it take to get weapon focus in the training room??
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34990
34992 35004
>>34987
Without knowing the level distribution, that sounds about right
>>34986
All in good time. While Tracy is catching boars (its boars btw), did you want to continue trolling Darkie?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34991
34993
>>34989
About a week, game-time
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.34992
>>34990
yes i do.
i bring him his soup.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.34993
34995
>>34734
>>34991

Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.34994
34996
adolf-hitler[1].jpg
>>34986
Also, you'd have to complete some great mission/feat/quest in the name of Hitler to earn the class as your deity's favorite champion.
I suggest gassing the kikes (for real this time).
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34995
34997
>>34993
Thanks for the reminder. Also, if Infernius does a stunner, wouldn't it also be kind of like a gore, since he's got a horn?
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.34996
35004
>>34994
oh i can't be one then.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.34997
>>34995
yea that's what i was thinking.
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.34998
35003 35005
How can he do a "stunner"?
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.35000
Trump is free
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.35001
35004
Trumpaladin frees himself of the devil horse
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35002
Kek
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35003
>>34999
>>34998
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6B9BQWbzWxA
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35004
35006 35007 35010
>>34990
What's the clearest path for Tracy to become a Perfect Wight?
>>34988
>>35001
No staph. he was were supposed to wake up in the cuckshed to the smell of bacon. Don't ruin muh scene.
The duct-tape is fucking inescapeable anyway, so better off snoozing until she finishes cooking breakfast.
>>34996
Why? It's still 7 levels away until he has the attack bonus.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35005
35008 35010
>>34999
>>34998
Stunning Fist (if that's what you meant) requires a selected feat, unless you're a Monk.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35006
35010 35012
>>35004
i would have to get hitlers attention.
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.35007
35012
>>35004
Okay...
why does she take him though? To prevent him from escaping if he wakes up?
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35008
>>35005
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OhTHlia1NXE
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35009
35010 35017
>Torc's faggot dies from exhaustion
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35010
35011 35015 35016 35017
>>35005
I don't think he was going for the stunning strike, it was just a meme-reference
>>35004
Yeah about that duct tape,...
>clearest path
I don't know, and it would take me time to figure out
>>35006
Still on about that are you? How many times have you heiled?
>>35009
Exhaustion? o_O
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35011
35013
>>35010
a lot.
NBd4A
?
No.35012
35014 35017
maxresdefault.jpg
[1d20 = 8]
*lays sleeping husbando in cuckshed*
*roasts boar*
Rolling to buck tree for an apple or something to put in its mouth.
>>35007
She has more ranks in survival while he's touching her.
Would he have tried to escape? If so,
yes.

>>35006
Did you consider putting more ranks into Knowledge-Religion? You could probably discover the quest yourself if you studies the holy book.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35013
35022
>>35011
I don't recall much heiling,....
https://youtu.be/AnpTWKKWQ1o?t=1m23s
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35014
35018
>>35012
yea i have 10 ranks in it.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35015
35019
>>35010
Actually, could they have also made some non-magical duct tape for day-to-day utility, using regular glue? Sovereign Duct tape is for more extreme issues, like holding dams together in an earthquake...
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35016
35019
>>35010
Choirs are exhausting man

So what have I missed?
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35017
35024
>>35009
Alas poor Torcuil's Faggot, we hardly knew ye

>>35010
>How many times have you heiled?
This. Trumpaladin is one of the shittiest paladins in the history of Paladins, but Elway is at least getting a return on his investment. He built a stadium, mentions football in every public speech which is often, goes to games, and is well on his way to expanding the franchise to a second city

>>35012
Kek, that's resourceful at least
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35018
35020
>>35014
Try rolling a knowledge check to find out your lord's mission for you.
Is a Cleric answering his lord's ambition an easy, basic, or tough question DC?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35019
35020 35023
>>35016
Kek, that they are
Well, Tracy is roasting a boar in unknown place #7, Torcuil and Thez are still on a beach finding their bearings, Infernius is still trolling Darkie, and I'm free for the day, so can actually do stuff.
"I don't suppose you know how to Teleport?" Thez asks.
>>35015
Duct tape is magic tho.

Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35020
35021 35024 35030
>>35018
>Is finding out the purpose God has set for you an easy or difficult question
......

>>35019
>Duct tape is magic tho
This. Wait. Can we manufacture it and sell it?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35021
35028
>>35020
>Tape
Sure, Sparintenar would love that shit, especially if its camo'd.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35022
35025
>>35013
*wipes away tears*
sieg heil! sieg heil! sieg heil!
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35023
35032
>>35019
"Yeah, I can teleport. To the tower I assume?"
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35024
35026 35029
>>35017
Try walking througfh town and healing the poor or other kinds of charity. From logs I've read, it's normal for Clerics and Paladns to get swamped with poor people begging for healing wherever they go. Charity/sacrifice earns them Good Boi Points.
>>35020
Well, a Cleric should at least have a good hunch about what his god wants him to do, maybe he can get a bonus for Reading the whole Mein Kampf 6 gorillion times (also, Read Magick spell + Divination).
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35025
35027
>>35022
Deutschland Deuschland über alles!
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35026
35030 35031
>>35024
That reminds me, we can charge for medical services. I think we can also sell use of the entertron to people far away who have someone they want resurrected
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35027
35032
>>35025
Möge das deutsche Volk für immer regieren!
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35028
35032
>>35021
so have i made it to the drow with his soup yet?
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35029
35033
>>35024
Can they get tendies with good boi points?
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35030
35034
>>35020
>>35026
*wafts bacon*
*lays beside husbando*

>Paladin charging money for the needy to use his Law on Hands ability.
Don't be a Jew, Anon.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35031
35033
>>35026
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35032
35035 35039
>>35023
"Unless you're keen on exploring. Gimme a sec." <whoooof>
>>35027
It suddenly occurs to Infernius that there is no possible way that the party could have eliminated all the (((rats))). Knowing how they work and operate, they are sure to have multiple bases of operation, and be inter-connected across the map.
>>35023
<whoooof> "...left the goddamn glider-wings in the Court City. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Oh well," she ports in mid-rant.
"There's several settlements and smaller cities to the north, and a few larger cities to the west. I don't recognize any of them, but if you want to gather information we can do that, but I'd just as soon get back. I had an idea for the Fight Club, especially with the potential for liches and vampires from the Court,"
>>35028
Uh, unless you stopped on the way. "Not to be cheeky, but how am I to eat it?"
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35033
>>35029
For Clerics, I guess you'd need a certain number to get good effects from Spells like Planar Ally. Also, their Holy scripture probably has it's own requirements for charity.
Paladins are (normally) required to do everything they can to help those in need, so long as it doesn't require performing ebil acts to do so.
>>35031
Ikr.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35034
35036
>>35030
>Wakes up
>Wonders if it was all just a bad dream
>Demon Horse is there
>Nope, it's real
>She's at least pretending to be nice, so there's that
"Hey Tracy"
*pets horsey or pony as appropriate*
"D'aww, you made me breakfast? That's so sweet"
*inspects bacon for authenticity*
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35035
35037
>>35032
can you describe the way the cast is made around his head?
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35036
35038
385624__suggestive_artist-colon-livesmutanon_oc_oc only_oc-colon-tracy cage_bed_bedroom eyes_female_grayscale_knife_monochrome_mouth hold_prone_solo_so.png
>>35034
"Good morning, Flashy."
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35037
35040 35041
>>35035
I was absent during the casting (I wanted to leave his head in a bucket, remember? Xp) but I would assume it would fully encapsulate his body from the neck down.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35038
35041 35044
>>35036
*pets pony*
"Good morning Tracy"
*removes knife from pony mouth*
*inserts tongue into pony mouth*
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35039
35042
>>35032
"Is there a way I could leave a... a...
Ah fuck what was it called..."
Torc paces a bit before remembering
"Ah yes, a waypoint here so I could teleport back if I wanted? Either way I'm ready to head back."
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35040
35042
>>35037
"me feed you."
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35041
35042
>>35037
>only the neck down
Does it impair his Concentration? Otherwise, couldn't he just use the Alter Self spell and an Escape Artist check to turn into a viper and slip out?
>>35038
"~Hmmmmmm..!"
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35042
35043 35044 35048
>>35039
"You don't need to waypoint this location. Now that you're aware of it, you can teleport here at will. I'm rdy to go."
>>35041
Alter self requires movement and gestures to cast, even as an assassin; not an option.
>>35040
"As undignifying as it is, I'll take it."
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35043
35045
>>35042
"say aah."
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35044
35046 35049
>>35038
*takes knife back*
*cuts into pork and serves it*
"Are you ready to go on an adventure today, ~Flashy?"
>>35042
>gestures
This is news to me, what does Tracy need to do for her spells? It doesn't require some ninja hand-sign, does it?
>tfw no fingers
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35045
35047
>>35043
"Really?"
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35046
35054
>>34951
D'aww. Has breakfast with pony

>>35044
"I have things I need to do, but sure. What do you have in mind?"
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35047
35049
>>35045
"open mouth or me cant feed."
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35048
35049
>>35042
"Ah okay"
Torc teleport to the tower
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35049
35050 35051
>>35044
>ninja-seal
Depends on the spell. Alter self requires verbal and somatic (body movement) to cast. Each spell has particular requirements (materials negated)
>>35047
"Oh fine, AHHH," he says with a bit of spite.
>>35048
Where in the tower?
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35050
>>35049
*makes sure to get all of the vegetables in the spoon.*
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35051
35052
>>35049
Main lobby
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35052
35053
>>35051
K. Torcuil and Thez <POP> back to the tower. Distantly, they hear a very irritated "AHHHH".
"IIIIIIIIIIIIII'NIIIIIIIIIIS!" Thez yells.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35053
35055
>>35052
"ME IN HERE!!!"
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35054
35056
>>35046
"It irks me to let those targets get away... What do you say we investigate the area and see where they went today?"
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35055
35058
>>35053
"Now what the hell is he doing?"
Torc heads to the room where the voice came from
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35056
35057
>>35054
"Do you mean in the Ethereal realm? I personally am just fine to be the target that got away"
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35057
35067 35068
>>35056
"There were several Ebil auras, don't you think we should investigate?"
Also, I'm starving for XP.

Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35058
35059 35060
>>35055
Torcuil arrives and Thez <whoooof> appears to see Infernius about to spoon-feed Darkie, who's got his mouth open like,... well like a hospital patient in a body cast.
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35059
35060 35061
>>35058
"Uhhh, Infernius, what are you doing?
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35060
35061
>>35058
>>35059
"hey ana, darkie was hungry."
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35061
35062 35063
>>35059
>>35060
"Uh yeah, I thought we were starving him. Have you tried interrogating him first?"
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35062
35064
>>35061
"We where leaving him in solitary containment!
Trust me, its effective..."
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35063
35064
>>35061
"no but he might be more inclined to talk if we feed him."
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35064
35065 35066
>>35062
"I know, that's why not being solitary and feeding him baffles me."
>>35063
"This! Bloody hell, don't stop, please. I'll tell you what I know! Ahhhhh!" he says much more graciously, hoping Infernius will continue.
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35065
>>35064
Torc considers punching Darkie in the face
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35066
35069 35074
>>35064
*continues feeding*
"here comes the luftwaffe."
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35067
35069 35070
>>35057
"If while wondering through the mountains here we stumble upon a Great Wyern Red Dragon, we can teleport out, you can jaunt, and we can run like hell. What happens if we encounter something too strong to kill in the Ethereal realm? Does it have a way to follow us if we juant? Is it faster than us? We can't teleport. You can't hide or do sneak attacks. I can't dismount and do flank attacks. If we die on the material plane, Thez can get out stuff. If we die on the Ethereal plane, it's gone forver. And our souls may even be taken.

You tell me just precisely what those things are, how you are sure they won't kill us, and how you plan to kill them, then maybe we'll go."
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35068
>>35057
>fast forwarding a bit to finish breakfast and get the show on the road
>*slices out large, generous portion of the porkbelly for Trumpaladin*
>[hungry hoers noises]
>*ferociously into the remains of the carcass and eats as ferociously as a pregnant monster-hoers would* (says something about cravings)
*munch* "I've always been so fucking hungry these past few months..!"*munch*
>*looks at body, ribs no-longer exposed*
"...and I've been putting on a lot of weight too..." *munch*
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35069
35070 35071 35072 35073
>>35066
Okay, now Thez is embarrassed for him, but mutters "I hope the Tower surveillance system is getting all this, for blackmail purposes."
>>35067
>we can teleport out"
Um, how exactly?
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35070
35075
>>35067
>If we die on the Ethereal plane, it's gone forver.
Her Etherealness would end as soon as she's incapacitated.
"I'm not afraid, Flashy. I'm confident if we're together."
[affectionate hoers noises]
>>35069
>Tower surveillance system
Wat?!
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35071
35072 35077
>>35069
Helm
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35072
35077
>>35069
>how exactly
Doesn't he have a Helm of Teleportation?
>>35071
Pls gib bootz for Sneak Attacks. They're more useful on her.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35073
35081
>>35069
*infernuis turns his head in such a way that darkie cant see and flashes the biggest smile to thez then goes back to regular infernuis expression and continues feeding him*
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35074
>>35066
>stuka noises
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35075
35076 35077 35079
>>35070
GM explicitly said we'd both get killed and we would have lost our equipment if we got too close to those who-knows-whats. What more do you want?
"Why though? If we kill bandits here we make it safer for travelers and can take the loot. If we kill a dragon we can take a hell of a lot of loot. If we locate a city we can add a trading partner, and I have been meaning to find a source of iron so we can send it to Krenshall. The material realm gives us much more to gain and is a hell of a lot less risky"
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35076
35080
>>35075
Bandits probably aren't ebil, let alone ebil enough to have auras.
"What bandits?Are you saying you just want to make our way home on hoof, Flashy?"
She never implied she want to be ethereal again, btw.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35077
35078
>>35072
>>35071
Helm of Flash-Step (quickened Dimension Door, range limit 100')
>>35075
This. Etherealness doesn't end when incapacitated
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35078
>>35077
>Etherealness doesn't end when incapacitated
Oh. Good to know then.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35079
35080
>>35075
She'll go wherever he wants to; just decide where to go so we can get to the exploring/combat/whatever.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35080
35082
>>35076
>>35079
"Why don't we follow that footpath to the base of the mountain?"
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35081
>>35073
"You uh,... seem to,... know? what you're doing, so I'll be back," she says with a <whoooof>.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35082
35084
>>35080
"That's fine by me, ~Flashy."
*buries bones, stamps out fire, and tramples cuckshed*
>a few minutes later
They're on the road.
NBd4A
?
No.35083
35085 35089 35092
[1d20+21 = 37]
*follows path to the base of the mountain*
Rolling to Spot any nearby creatures