605 replies and 60 files omitted.
>>31193I thought you were riding her?
[1d20 = 15]>>31193Damn it, the dice disappeared when I edited
Roll for pussy grapple
>>31196Yes, he would lean back in the saddle and reach with one hand
>Torc waits for taxi to the rest of the party
>>31198Don't fall off, she's four meters long, at least.
>waits for Infernius's faggot, o we can actually do things
>>31200She's the size of draft horse. Clydesdale, Percheron or Shire
>>31200>MetersGet out of my country with that Bolshevik speak
>>31204Kek, maybe when not mounted. She's a draft horse when mounted
>>31199>Thez pokes her head in the stables"Infernius flipped out, he may be hiding somewhere in the tower. He hasn't tried to leave by the front or by the dais."
>>31206Torc recoils a bit
"Gah, oh hey Thez. So he is still in the tower?"
>remembers sense chaos"Hey come wth me, we need someone who can get through to Infernius"
Torc casts Detect Chaos adheads that way.
*Casts Detect Evil Again, while trying to calm Tracy so she can get back to Tracking*
>>31207"You go on ahead. I'm covering the entrance."
Remember, you're waiting on Infernius' faggot for more.
[3d20 = 35]>>31176 →>he may still be somewhere in the towerCasts Detect Good Again, to find his aura.
Spot+5
Listen+5
Track (via the scent of his blood and diarrhea, since he was bleeding profusely, and hasn't bathed since then)
Tracy then moves in that direction.
>>31209You have a hell of a lot more than +5 as Cauchemar. You have +21 on both
>>31211GM said I don't get any racial bonuses in that form.. +5 was just from pony-senses.
>>31212reeeeeeBut this is full Paladin's Mount form
>>31209Trumpaladin orders Fae, who defaults to 11 ranks each in spot and listen and has a +4 racial bonus for each, to continue searching new areas with Spot and Listen checks
>>31209"Alright."
Torc wanders aimlessly, cause he can't find the choatic pressence
>>31216>>31212No bonuses when its a knowledge/experience based skill. Spot and Listen checks would apply.
>>31214I know what we can do instead. In fact, I know two things we can do instead
>>31217I don't understand. I'm just say Torc can't find him cause his faggot isn't here.
[i]But when he comes back...
While Torc has nothing to do, he inspects his new chopsticks
>>31219I won't be here for that. Thez is defaulting to monitor the main entrance and the dais, not letting anyone leave. (stunning fist into submission)
>>31221They're made of rattan, and they're connected at one end
>>31220A couple days ago I intended Trumpaladin to "take a walk around the world to ease his troubled mind," that is, go to a different part of the map as yet unexplored as a way of getting away from the party members. Relations have improved since then so the rationale isn't as strong, but the mountain range to to the South is barely explored, and going the way we went to the Troll encapment, going in the direction the trolls (tried to) flee, is another mountain range, and also what looks like an Elf city just a little ways to the north in the valley. I figured it would be worth exploring these areas, for tribes or monsters or whatever.
Now here's the issue. Fae can fly, can fight, and can track, but Large Dragons can go a hell of a lot faster than she can (or Tracy, for that matter), and if Trumpaladin is attacked by a large dragon, she can't teleport or jaunt away.
So I thought I'd ride Trollestia, who can do most of the same things, but also can teleport. However, I think Trollestia's teleportation only works in certain familiar areas. Which means only Tracy (who is usually too busy to be used) can do everything that is needed for the exploration
tl;dr: Go exploring, maybe murder some things and loot them.
Detect Ebil/Good still works on the Ethereal plane, right? Could the two change planes, detect the auras, and then immediately phase towards his location?
>>31224Trollestia can't teleport. Only Torcuil and Lenos can teleport, while Thez does Dimension Door at absurd range (for the ability).
>>31227That's what I thought. I think only Tracy is capable of doing what I thought I needed
>>31226But she's so busy all the time!
>>31223I'm so shocked
>>31222Okay
>>31227Haha plebs
Bow before my teleporting powers
>>31229When they're split, they split into two pairs of chopsticks. One of those pairs continues the chain of duplication, the other splits seemingly as normal.
>>31231Yes yes, you told me last night.
But then you made a vague comment about there being a good use for them
>>31232You're seriously just going to sit there and ask? You're not going to "Identify" or "Analyze Dweomer", or something that eliminates my ability to be vague and non-descript?
>>31234Dweomer?
Cast itwasimplyediwantedtoidentify
>>31232Try burning one of the duplicate chopsticks.
Then see how quickly you can break it to duplicate it.
>>31232Perhaps they can be used as eating utensils?
>>31235You said Torcuil looks at the chopsticks. Xp
>>31238With the spell Create Food And Water, could they be made into Sustaining Chopsticks, that duplicate?
>>31239They burn quickly, they wouldn't be an effective source of fire-wood
>>31241Not sure what you mean by sustaining
>>31245I mean kind-of like a sustaining Spoon.
http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/Sustaining_spoon (it makes cucumber rolls instead of gruel, the gruel of sushi)
Even if the enchantment on the duplicated pair wore off after a day, it could still be used to feed a large number of starving people.
I need to stop replying to multiple comments at once...
>>31247Neat! We'd have to correctly enchant the chopsticks first, and they are already enchanted so that'd be a bit difficult
>>31246
>Sustaining Spoon
Odd, it's called "Myrlund's Spoon" in my books.
Yes, that's exactly what they do. If placed in a bowl, they're like instant instant ramen (single use).
>>31246
Okay, I'm really curious as to the remarks on Trollestia
Alright, I'm out, don't kill yourselves
>>31254Same, but I'll be back later
>>31247>tfw you spent 6 gorillion hours drooling over magick items your character could never craft>>31251>that's exactly what they doReally? Wow, I guessed right.
>>31253It was going to be a remark semi-clever, semi-jestful about why you'd be better off trading-in your class levels due to alignment inflexibility, but I gave up on it after I accidentally posted without typing it. It was mostly trolling though, so don't bother worrying about it.
I wonder if the Rod of Sneezes does anything else but spray mucus...
>>31258When you first obtained the rod, I was under the impression that what it did was caused a targeted opponent to sneeze, and thus lose a round, or at least a standard action, or at least was unable to cast verbal spells in that time. That's an absolute godsend when you're fighting an extremely powerful opponent like a high level wizard, which can one hit kill any player character within 60 feet in a single round with something like the Implosion spell. That's why I wanted it so badly
>waits for something intresting
>>31259What you just described is identical to the affects of Dust of Sneezing and Coughing; however, it's considered to be poison (even need the Poison spell to craft), and would break Code. I thought it'd do something like that too, but it seems I was wrong. I wonder if it could be modified to something like that, or even be used to Transmit Contagion.
>>31259Also, normally, wizards need to prepare their arcane spells in advance, so they're not at all impervious to combat. A well-aimed sword or mace would do just as well if not better for what you described.
>>31261>Breaks Code of Conduct because a sneeze inducer is "poison"Oh hush. I'd rather fall than be broken into pieces by an OP verbal wizard spell anyways.
I noticed you used it on Torcuil when he was confrontational. That's precisely how I think it should be used, although in that case it seemed a bit premature, since it hadn't yet degenerated into violence.
>>31262>well aimed sword or maceI think a wizard can still cast a verbal spell even after half their health is drained by melee attacks and they'll be out if their opponent gets one more round in. I'd prefer the ability to disrupt spells, especially if I'm sixty feet away, within spell/wand range but a round away from melee range.
>>31263>I noticed you used it on Torcuil when he was confrontational.I used it on Infernius too. I didn't know what else to do to them that wasn't lethal. I'd promised not to stab them.
>sixty feetThere's no way any kind of rod has that much reach. Better off shooting arrows to fuck-up their Concentration.
Trumpaladin spends the time waiting for Inferius's faggot, or someone else to come, by tattooing into her skin (not visible above the fur) the numbers "571." He designates these as a Mark of justice. Should she consume Human Flesh, the Mark will burn through the fur and be visible, and she will be cursed to lose 4 points on several kinds of rolls.
He tells Tracy exactly what he has done after concluding
>>31266No! Fuck that shit! If I can't rip Infernius's guts out while his faggot isn't here, you can't cast freaking curses on Tracy while I'm not around. I've never tried to curse you, wtf.
She'd bolt as soon as she felt the needle saying she wanted to check on her birds, and promptly disappear until Infernius's faggot gets back.
I gotta fix dinner for my cousins, so I can't deal with this autism.
>>31267Oh hush. If you hadn't robbed Korak and murdered several of his followers he never would have turned on us
>>31268See you then
>>31269The hell does that have to do with this'
"This body has such delectable Faith."
>>31272The Mainstien plan doesn't make Hitler a Travel god, but whatever
>>31274But the blitzkrieg strategy did.
>>31277Now you gotta go track him
>>31280He says he teleported out though
>>31283I would recommend going to Ben's, since that is the only location I can think of, besides a place to start a get away, that Jewfernius would want to go to. I think there's also some way of tracking teleported objects, but I am not sure how that works
>>31272See THIS is why spontaneous spell-casting for mages is bullshit.
Anyway, from that, it's evident that he's teleporting to a place he's been before and/or a place he's very familiai with. It's also apparent that he has to be on this plane.
>>31286Nope.
>>31287Hey, I'm the only mage here.
He is a fucking Cleric
>>31285Summon the Trashman
>>31284Give me five minutes
>>31287It's either in the proximity of the tower as a point from which to stage a retreat, or it's a place he actively wants to go to like Ben's office. I still recommend going there
And yeah, this is way the fuck OP, so we'll see if GM lets him take the Travel domain after waiting more than 2 months to specify it
*Continues Tattooing pony*
>>31288FUCK THIS
There is a spell to track teleported objects/people, but Torc can't use it because psionics and sheit.
Trumpaladin does the only thing that seems to be available to him... he summons the Trash Man
I am the Trash Man here to invade your thread
>>31292Hey, I'm the meme mage here, I'll summon him
Prepare for stat rolling
>>31295He told us. 10:30 PM, which probably means 1:30 AM EST
>>31289If he tattoos her, she gets to tattoo him, with whatever design she wants.
>>31296Awww..
[6d20 = 89]The Trash ManClass: Monk
Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
Stats: rolled in order: str, dex, con, int, wis, and cha.
Special skill: eating trash increases str and dex
This monster is a temporary summon, it doesn't last long but is good for low strength characters. Stats are different everytime, and is determined by die roll>>31296Fuck
>>31297>inb4 Butterfly tattoo or penis on his faceWell, the tattoo would be completely invisible below her fur, so it's not an embarrassing feature. It's only there to be the vessel of the Mark of Justice spell, which while technically a curse, is only activated by very specific conditions.
She can't Mark of Justice him, but she
can make him Mark of Justice himself, which he is then stuck with and can't just break free of.
>>31301Be afraid infernius
Trash Man> ITS MY CHARACTER! I'M THE TRASH MAN! I COME OUT, I THROW TRASH, ALL OVER, ALL OVER THE RING! AND THEN, I START EATING GARBAGE! AND THEN I PICK UP THE TRASH CAN, AND I BASH THE GUY WITH IT!
[1d20 = 2]>>31303Trumpaldin uses attack: Garden Hose
>>31302Actually, he can remove the curse, but she can make him swear on Paladin's oath that he will only seek to have it removed if she consents
>>31303Dont make me channel DayMan.
>>31289>this is way the fuck OPI believe the original justification for removing the praying-to-cast mechanic was "Your god like you, and he will grant you spells"...
On that note, do Clerics still fall if they break their codes under control of something else? I reading books that Paladins still fall when they're in lose-lose situations (as in the "Drop your sword, or the baby gets it!" kind of shitspot), but I haven't read that much more about parasitic control. Clergy doesn't usually provide very much lenience for technicalities though, as gods may immediately seize to empower their Clerics once they see that they are not fit to carry out their will, whatever the reason that is. We don't have another Cleric to cast Atonement if he falls, so he could be fugged if he does anything to disappoint Hitler while under influence.
>>31299Monks have to be Lawful. Trash man should be a Barbarian.
>>31307Paladin's fall for lying, so a verbal agreement is as good as a binding contract.
>>31311In my personal opinion, Hitler would not give spells to a person under the control of Judeo-Bolshevism, simply because those spells would obviously be used by the Judeo-Bolsheviks. Even if the person under the control were blameless
>Trashman is a barbarianAgreed
>>31311But monks are unarmed!
Fine, he's barabarian, weapon: Trash Can
>>31315It will sadly only be a short session before I need to enter "bitter sweet" sleep this day too
>bitter because I will miss out on this game, sweet because I will be in another land of ponies >>31316Understandable, just glad to see you
[1d20 = 15]
Evasion! Dodge!
[1d20 = 18]>>31320Trash Man grappees
You can't blame me because Trump started it
>>31317>>31318Thanks. Will try to get in the game more often.
>On the upside my I have served my three week grounding because of my wingboner incident TRACY GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!
>>31322Nor Filly! Charm the Trashman with Cuteness!
>>31325Why did you attack him though?
>>31327Trash Man don't care life is a gaant wrestling match to him
And Trump threw the first punch
TM> DON'T MAKE ME GET MY MOSTER CONDOM, FOR MY MAGNUM DONG
>>31307>>31302Now, she can make any non-harmful, non-inconvenient, non-hampering curse she wishes?
>>31325Is Trashman being mean to you, or anyone else?
>>31327lol
>>31330Torc> Oh hi Norfilly. Don't mind Mr. Trash Man, Trump agrivated him so now he will pay the price.
>>31329She'll have to rescue him from the grips of the Trashman first.
Pretty much. There are certain specific quid pro quos that because of the importance I'd demand further concessions from Tracy to make the sides equal, but basically
>>31331HE SMELLED BAD! I TRIED TO CLEAN HIM!
>>31333TM> YOU CAN'T CLEAN ME OF MY TRASH, IT REACHES INTO MY SOUL
Torc reaches down and picks up Norfilly for a hug
>>31330I WILL PAY YOU IN SO MUCH CANDY IF YOU GET HIM TO PUT ME DOWN
>>31332Fight Trash Man yourself, m8. This is funny, and it won't kill him.
*doesn't see because she's feeding her birds*
>>31336Trump can kill him, he has low af con and he's meant to be expendable. I may make those the normal stats.
Trash Man tackles Trump
>>31331Okay, but play nice. We all know what happens if booping goes too far.
>>31337>pointless reinforcementsStaph you coward. I'm bored as hell and I wanna watch him fight the Trash Man
[4d20 = 36]
*sighs*
Full Round attack
Quick Draw Vanderiem
Slash, Slash, Slash, Slash
>>31339Torc> Don't worry, Trump'll be fine
Trash Man throws another can at Trump, who is providing little resistance
>>31341This is where the +24 first attack, +19 second attack really come in handy
>>31344What's your base Attack bonus?
>>31345+16 +11 +6 +1. A +3 strength modifier, and Vanderiem has a +5 against non evil
>>31348Aww...
*Weeps, knowing he destroyed something beautiful*
>>31350*pulls candy and peach rings from pockets for nor filly*
>>31350"Sadly yes"
Torc makes the body disappear
>>31351"Luckily I can make him better. Thank you for the test Trump."
>>31357"He'll be fine little filly"
>>31362I'll make him next
Torc is gonna be a summoner/transmutalist
>is still traumatized from killing an innocent homeless man
>>31364"Snap out of it Trump, I wanted it to happen."
>>31364Then why you draw sword instead of just grappling?
>>31366"To test his strength, he'll be fine"
The rolls are Trash Man's permenant stats
>>31367His roll was really high, so low chance of success. My prefered plan was to have waifu with super buffed grapple remove me and jaunt out of there, but that didn't happen
>>31368".... Okay....
We still need to find Jewfernius"
Sadly I have to enter sleepmode and welcome the night before it becomes day.
>hope to be back tomorrow for more candy and fun.
>bad clock telling me it is 3am
>>31370Good night, see you later
>>31369"Right, any idea how?"
>>31372"I still believe that his single most likely next move is to seek out a Jewish person - the only known candidate is Ben. If he isn't doing that now or hasn't done it already, I think he will do it eventually"
>>31374"Yeah, I guess we should go check."
>>31376No point in doing anything until GM gets back.
I've got work to do for now.
>>31377"Uh... Do I hold your hand to teleport there or what? Are you familiar with his office?"
>>31379"Yeah, I know where it is"
Torc grabs Trump's should and poof, they are there
>>31384Fuck
>>31385"WAIT"
Torc teleports him and Trump back to the tower.
"I have some of his hair around here somewhere, don't ask, help me find it"
>>31386"Where should I look for it? I also want to say, maybe check Gestapo headquarters? I know if I were hiding, I'd probably go to the Stadium, and call in Fae and the Generals"
[1d20 = 5]>>31387"One second, it should be in one of these rooms."
Perception check
>>31388Fuck, Torc ain't finding it.
>>31389Thats should do...
>>31391Pile o red hair.
"TRUMP YOUR A LIFE SAVER"
Torc begins scribbling in his tome
I saw a spell for this earlier give me a second
>>31393Gibs red hair to Torcuil
"What are you intending? Demand?"
You made a scroll to teleport to his position as well, but I think that's meta