And the Game must?! go on!
Tonight we find the party split. Trump, Tracy, and Taylor find themselves in a grand banquet hall with a gradually increasing number of stiff-backed military personnel, along with a variety of less-but-still disciplined civilians. The whole place reeks of rigidity and efficiency. All boots are shiny, all suits and uniforms are crisp and clean.
Meanwhile, Torcuil - who didn't die - prepares to venture forth with Infernius and Thez who just last night got engaged, no homo to wreck shop on an entire city of commies. "Isn't wanton killing evil" you might ask, to which I say "Not when its commies".
So then, let us begin,... again.
930 replies and 86 files omitted.
>>26709[overjoyed bridal hoers noises]
*sniffs and snorts for a few minutes*
*gazes at the world*
"... You know, from this angle, it really doesn't look half bad.. I could say I've gotten used to that little rock.."
>cue descent Well, that's one dramatic relationship catastrophe averted.
*throws away booklet*
>Torc is the only one not married now
HAHA BEING SINGLE ONLY INCREASES MY WIZARD POWERS
>still waiting for GM to come back and rain fiery brimstone down upon us for being such insufferable faggots...
Hell yes we're going on a death spiral dive!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAwcoFoAk_kBut first:
Trumpaladin places his hand on Tracy's fur, runs his fingers through it, and looks out over the world
"It'll tend to do that. When she's persistent, she can make you love her. Even if she gives you bad days sometimes. You come to find she's what holds your interest most"
Looks back at Tracy
"The world too I guess"
>>26715You'll get there eventually.
Taylor is still single. >>26717"To the world!"
*dashes towards the planet*
>>26722Trumpaladin now directs his mount/waifu downwards. Straight downwards, in a plunge to the world. With all that same glee as the pilot riding the bomb down in Dr. Srangelove, he holds on tight, but lifts himself from his saddle as he does so...
It makes him feel very much alive
>>26723Hopefully Thez and Inferius will work out their marital problems GM sits wherever GM sits, still brooding because Trump's faggot stole the wind from his sails and exerted authority over his thread. Thez rocks playfully nearby.
"Its... so sweet,... I bet'cha never,..."
He cuts her off "You know we're supposed to be lurking, making them suffer in our absence for having,...."
"That was YOUR idea."
"And YOUR idea started this mess in the first place!"
"Maybe, and I guess I still owe everyone an explanation,
as do you."
"MMmmph."
"Screw you, sit in your little corner then. I'm out!" <whoof>
GM sighs.
>>26725<whooof>"I... I'nis,...?"
>>26726*infernuis eyes are devoid of any emotion*
"yea."
>>26728"I,... um,... I,... n, nevermind," she says, unsure how to respond. "I'll just,...." she sighs and sits down near to his feet.
>>26729"you like him better than me dont you, he was better wasnt he?"
>>26731Let's skip the ERP scene (in text, not occurrence); I don't have the energy to type it out tonight..Sure, that could've happened.
>>26730https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=feA64wXhbjo>>26729Torc walks out, hair singed and steaming a bit. He starts to talk and then
>>26732Torc then goes back into the room he just left
>>26733Tracy and Trumpaladin find a nice spot in the woods, and touch down. They admire the beauty of the forest, the world, and how it reflects on their new union, before Tracy buckles her legs and the two express their unity once more
>>26736>>26735>>26733But now here's the important thing
"Infernals express their union ceremonies in the blood of others. There's not really a direct equivalent under the law of God or Man, but to baptize our union in the blood of traitors, might not be a bad start"
Do we need to kill them? >>26736Tower, Torc is currently stuck in a side room as to not interupt
>>26732"I deserve that. I want to deny loving him, but I can't. I
do love him, just as I love everyone in our group. That doesn't justify what I did, regardless my intentions. The feelings I have for him and everyone else are completely different though. I know this isn't something I can just say and make good on. I accept that."
>>26737>take tobacco-free, non-nicotine, 100% baby-safe huff from sword's vaporizer."I've never been to Hell (I think), but what were you meaning to do?" *smiles*
>>26739"heres my items, im leaving."
*you dont see the ring in there*
>>26742>bangs pots and pans together>>26743Torc
Who has been shamelesly listening in teleports infront of Infernius
"Damn it, I was the only witness to your wedding, I'm not gonna be the only one for your goddamn divorce"
>>26740"Just ask Torcuil if he still wants an ass beating. Oh he's powerful, that I trust. But your stealth, tracking, Etherealness, speed, and now shear strength, including a grapple as good as Inferius's. My spells, sword, and armor. All of this united together, as if one sword, one shield, one warrior attacking in unity... I'd rather be nice to our roommates, but if they want to play rough... Let's show them who is king of the playground."
>>26743"That's fair. But wherever you go, I won't be far behind. Whether it means standing beside you or lurking in your shadow, I accept my fate."
>>26744*pushes torc out of the way*
*proceeds toward the capital city*
>>26745"... When did either of those guys ever betray you?"
>>26746>>26743Fuck that's sad>>26747NOT YET TRACY AND I ARE HONEYMOONING THERE
>>26749"Let's see how we're greeted"
>>26748"Then you will not see me, but I WILL be there." <whoof>
>>26751Damn it
>>26752"Thez hold up a second, you may use your wdding present earlier than I expected."
>>26752>>26751"what is wrong with you 2? ME SAID LEAVE ME ALONE!!"
>>26757Um... I think I should pursue and talk to him...
*continues to the court city.*
Tracy takes her husband back to the tower, and returns to her duty.
>>26759On foot? He'll get served blue-rare.
>>26761We need to pursue Inferius
>Returns to her dutyTHIS is her duty
>>26761>implying he would carehis brother fucked his wife.
>>26763We need to pursue Inferius
>>26762Torc and Thez have it taken care of
>>26768Because he needs to be talked to, and Trumpaladin couldn't find him, catch up with him, or more importantly, run away from him on his own. He's her friend too.
Like literally you can just say she goes there and then after that she can be treated like a normal horse NPC by Trumpaladin >>26767Well, we gotta have time to do something
GM the scrolls are teleportation to current location. Torc was going to give Thez the one that would teleport her exacly where infernius was, no matter where he was. Thats why he needed the hair >>26778>Took her rider to the edge of space>Needs more mount skillsThey say exceptionally n the lore powerful nightmares could take their riders to the Abyss and back. I'll get to work on figuring it out.
Could use an Obsidian Horse figurine and use it as a magic amulet.
>>26782What? I just want an escape plan if talking doesn't work
>>26782Okay, I'll do this tomorrow. Even if I'll have work...
>>26784>Really should be in bedEscape from what? Infernius?
Just Track-down the drama queen and talk some sense into him.
... Take Tracy if you must...
>I'mma lose my shit if those eggs hatch while she's away >>26781Then A) don't claim Torc is attacking you when he asks for a stolen item back
B) don't blow the party up like this again
C) don't sugest killing another man's waifu.Everyone else seems to be gone, so see yall tomorrow
>>26790"Um... Inferius?"
*flying out of grapple range*
>>26793"I know I hurt you. It wasn't my choice. Maybe that is the problem"
>>26795>>26794all of a sudden infernuis busts out in a bprint toward the city
>>26796"What are you trying to prove!"
>>26799"Didn't you deliver an entire city with a mine while I was away?"
>>26799"I see what this is about... It's because you didn't get your fair share of the glory in the Kefka fight. Don't you worry. Together - but only together - we'll take the whole world. And your role will not be a small one. You're only just beginning"
>>26801"this is about you fucking my wife and making me a cuck."
*infernuis's voice is cold and emotionless*
>>26802"You know I only like hooved women"
>>26803"so you're denying it now then are you?"
>>26805"i know. you cant kike your way out of this,(((Trumpalidin)))"
>>26804"I see. No, it happened. It definitely happened"
>>26806"Now that's just not nice..."
>>26808"being nice is why me in this situation now."
*alignment change chaotic evil.*
>>26808"that's what I thought this was about... You believe you're under appreciated. That your niceness goes unrewarded. No, that's not the case at all. You won my heart with your niceness. You won Thez's heart. Shit, even Tracy likes you, and she hates everyone. You're trusted, by everyone."
*looks away*
"You know I'm not as liked..."
>>26809"Uh..."
>>26809>>26810"me last act as good goy is turning meself into the court city government so they can dispose of me."
>>26811"Awww... But we all love you. We'd miss you...
You're my brother"
>>26813"You know she did that to punish me. To humiliate me. To deprive me of power and control, which she knows I always feel I need, when she thought I was abusing mine..."
>>26816"i dont even know if child is mine."
>>26817"It's probably yours. But even if it weren't you know damn well you'd be a great father, and a great husband, to a great mother..."
*said with genuine sadness*
"You'll be the best father he could have..."
>>26818"heh, raiseing another mans child? its like you're intentionally trying to cuck me."
>>26819"No... Just you'd make a good father and husband is all. Better than I will"
>>26820"it want matter anyway thez said she didnt want it."
>>26822"yea."
*infernuis sounds genuinely sad*
>>26823"That's... uh, uh, why doesn't she want it?"
>>26823>>26824"Is she afraid it will be infected with the demonic plague?
... I still fear for my own child from that"
>>26824"i dont know. and i wont be alive along enough to find out."
>>26826*comes in closer. closer. much closer. Hugs.*
>>26827"why are you doing that?"
>>26828"Because I know you need it. I love you"
>>26829"i dont need anything anymore."
>>26780This desu
>>26796Good luck, it will take days by foot, and you'll need to rest periodically. No, you can't claim supra-endurance and keep going either.
>>26816That wasn't it, but after review she did bind his hands and lock the door, it was definitely forced.
>>26821>>26823She never said that,
I said that. Metafuckers,....
>>26833Alright, fair point on intuition.
Did you ever stop or think to ask
why?
>>26834hes to hurt to ask about anything insightful like that.
Better question: what exactly does Infernius know about Thez, outside what I've mentioned (which was also all meta)?
>>26836her name, what happend between her and her family, what the golden bitch put her through, shes been in the game along time.
>>26837>family>bitchFootnotes at best. I haven't even begun to tell her full backstory.
I'll also point out that there's a reason the last word of the declaration of espousal is 'woe'.
>>26838and i think she mentioned being royalty, but that was like 7-8 threads ago so my memory is hazy.
>>26840My point is that he still doesn't know the first thing about her, and yet upon seeing the slightest glimpse he's already ready to an hero. Is that how relationships work in his mind?
>>26841>yet upon seeing the slightest glimpse he's already ready to an hero.he feels like he was made a cuck. that combined with the fact that his wife dosent want his child and the fact trump probbaly came inside her so he cant be sure if it even his is driving him insane with grief, anger, hopelessness, etc.
>>26842in fact the dude is pretty close to a mind crack.
>>26843Soooo,... he's not there yet then?
One last question (yes, I know, this is all meta): what does he want?
>>26844his core desire is to have a family since he never had that in his previous life. but post break(CE) infernuis's desire would probably be destroying the multi-verse.
>>26844hes very close to breaking irreparably.
>>26846So? Thez is broken irreparably, its no biggie.
>>26845Well, I won't deny that she's against the idea of having a child, but you assume that she has any say in the matter. I never mentioned where she was keeping the stone hidden. Spoiler, its not her regen stone anymore.
SHHHHHH >>26847i gotta sleep dude, ill probably be on around 3pm central.
>>26848No worries, I'm off to meat-space. Just know (and I don't say this aggressively) this isn't over, for him or for her.
>>26846If I could find a way to fix this situation in character, so can you.
>>26851Okay, so you don't like me. I get it. Everyone gets it. We all know this. Now stop talking to me. Our characters never interact in story anyways.
Leave me alone. There's no need for you to constantly keep trying to fight me now that your point is across
\r
>>26853I remember recoloring that pic for the first time, from an Octavia pic. I'm glad someone competent decided to do it right.
Does anyone know how Will saves work on non-magical objects? I'm thinking in the context of Evocation spells that target them, like Shatter:
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Shatter>>26855>Would just try to blow up random objects, but can only use it once per day and must protect eggzTracy gets to work on a Shatter scroll (will want to craft a Shatterspike later, will need four castings)
>>26856It's not like she has a wedding to plan or anything
>>26857>implying the stables isn't littered with wedding catalog magazinesShe's been planning/dreaming since day one, but official decisions take two.
>>26858I have some ideas...
I believe it is Saturday in game, which means the next day, Sunday, will have a Football game...
[1d100 = 32]
Rolling to hatch eggs.
>>26861You're free to do what you want, and you do. I don't care. Stay in a cave or kidnap our Norwegian player's character or whatever. Just stop intervening in Trumpaladin-Tracy affairs when you don't actually know most of what is going on
>>26861So, I'm confused, where are all the characters now?
As far as I understand:
>Tracy is in the stables, heating her eggs and grinding her handicrafts skills>Infernius is still angry and sad about getting cucked and is fuming as he walks in the general direction of the capital>Trump went after him to try to talk to him>Thez is lurking somewhere behind those two>Torc, idk atm (he teleports a lot)>Queen Taylor is being adored by hordes of entertainment-starved Spartans>Norfilly is helping herself to candy>Sad Alex is a statue in the tower>Lenos is still in the forge like he usually is, and hopefully won't come out until we find that stolen metal*places bundle of weed in the forge*
>>26865Trumpaladin figured Inferius couldn't be talked down, so he told him to send a pigeon reporting his findings back to the tower, and then returned
*confiscates illicit substance, and considers arresting pony*
"Naughty naughty"
>>26866"I don't use it, I thought it'd keep him happy."
*is sitting on eggs again*
>>26865Torc has retired to his cave, wondering if being the fifth wheel is pushing it
>>26869For the moment yes. He'll need to go into town to apply for a marriage license, and then probably find a way to set up magic goods export to Sparintenar, then he'll want to investigate durpistan before perhaps going to the court city himself. He'll also want to talk to Slovenia. If you want him to cast spells, want a potion or whatever, ask now
>>26867"Possession with intent to distribute is worse, little pony"
Link
>"If it keeps him from burning the tower down give him the whole crop of Mexico" >>26871>apply for a marriage licenseDoes Port Barry have an office for those?
>SpellsOkay then:
>Eagle's Splendor on the Cloak>Bulls Strength on the Belt>Cure Light Wounds on the Dagger >>26871"Also, if you could pick up a Rage Potion or two, that would be appreciated"
>>26872Well, usually you can apply with a clerk at the county courthouse. If Port Barry doesn't have a Courthouse, he's going to force one to be constructed.
I don't know about Tracy, but for Trumpaladin only an actual legal contract makes a marriage.
>Casts Bull's Strength on Belt>Casts Eagle's Splendor on the Cloak"Any idea if this charm potion can dye anything? I still have your acid resistance potion as well."
>casts Cure Light Wounds on the dagger"I'm not sure why you'd want a dagger to cure wounds, but sure"
>>26873"Sure, I'll look for that"
>>26874https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/SRD:Merciful"I'm not good at very much other than stabbing, but sometimes it's inconvenient when targets bite the dust."
>>26876"That's... Actually pretty prudent. Good thinking Tracy"
>>26874>this charm potion can dye"Did you consider just using paint? What do you need recolored?"
>>26877>It's finished, because a dagger doesn't take that long to make*sinister grin*
"It also means I won't have to hold back."
*slips dagger into bag*
>>26878"I just have it is all. I figured that if it were useful on magical crafting, you'd know how to use it, so I thought I'd offer it to you. Otherwise I'll just use it eventually on some unsuspecting government official, prisoner, or carpenter whom I'm afraid could resist and discover if l cast it on them myself"
>>26879"Sort of like how I don't have to hold back after your pregnancy"
Grins, and ruffles the fur of the pony on her head
can you enchant existing items with these spells? >>26883just keep asking for help and keep crafting. Even if an item seems useless we could trade it to the Sparintenars. Tracy has an insanely long gestation period, so I think these can be finishedTrumpaladin now grabs the soft blue fur of the insane stabby pony, and wraps his body around her, probably after first grabbing her off of the eggs and holding her like a giant pillow. He hugs her intensely
>>26886>>26885*removes armor plating to better feel soft flooffy pony*
*cuddles soft flooffy pony*
*humps soft flooffy pony, at first dry but then removes pants so he can feel the full richness of his new pony waifu*
*cums inside floods pony while cuddling soft fur*
If it isn't gold or silver it should have been set aside from the initial treasure horde. That should all still exist somewhere. I don't think Lenos would care if the cores were used either >>26887Good steel seems somehow more valuable in this universe because reasons, from what I've gathered; But I guess she could get to work on the Mace and the Helm. I'm going to ask Infernius and Taylor to help cast on the hilt of the great-sword, because I don't want to wait.
I really don't know what the best materials for making items are though.
>>26886>she's no American flag, but she's closeHe gives her a look
"Do you want to test out your new knife on that Arab guy sometime soon?"
>>26890"He's still dead, and I don't want to let him slip away by opening the cast before Thez gets back.. He didn't respond to pain anyway.."
*produces mummified elf hand*
"I made another Mage's Mand though."
>>26892At the sight of the hand, Trumpaladin's disposition changes. He's mostly over the disgust and revulsion, sure, but it's enough to knock him out of his floof induced trance and back into reality. He starts putting back on clothing and armor.
"I uh... Thought Thez had already revived him, so we could begin to starve and thirst him.
I had always thought that when you stabbed, you did it for your own sake, and not for the pain or pleasure of the person stabbed... I guess I'm really just getting to know you..."
He seems a bit awkward now
\r
>>26893"I thought it'd make a nice gift for that ninja, whenever he gets back..."
>Doesn't really want to explain stabbing philosophy, because she knows he won't understand anyway. >>26898How am I supposed to know why she stabs things?"Well, if you insist..."
*beams it into his head in seconds*
>It's a whole bunch of jumbled pony thoughts unknown to hoo-mans that would take decades to decipher, but feels frightening like there's still more to be revealed somehow>Empathetic link doesn't necessarily translate the medium of thoughtslink unrelated
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ZwwaODl5do >>26900Short answer is because she wants to.
>>26899>>26895"Alright, Tracy"
Trumpaladin leaves the room
>>26901Well sure, but that doesn't explain why she cares if stabbing the stabbing is ineffective at harming the elf
>>26902It's hardly stabbing if he doesn't respond: may as well be stabbing wax. It's still fun though.
The real reason is because I don't want to fuck-up and create the conditions for him to escape.
>>26902"Have a nice day, ~Flashy."
*gets back on egg-bed*
>>26906i saved alot of hopps memes when i was on /b/ and i never get a chance to use them. and i was bored.
>>26855I do
>>26856You could just take the awesomer one that Trump never uses,....
>>26871>marriage licenseWut the fuck
Fug it, gimme a sec and I'll bake nu and then finish the responses
>>26910hes been through some dark shit man, but it will be his last act as (CG) probably.
>>26911well obviously it wont they will most likely greet him as a hero, i dont really know i havent given it much thought.
>his core desire is to have a family since he never had that in his previous life. but post break(CE) infernuis's desire would probably be destroying the multi-verse.