Read "Corny Nuts"
Which brings us into the next edition of the Game thread! For newcomers, this is an RP thread thats been ongoing for,... shit, 3 months now. How time flies.
Anywhow, its based on a very loose and permissive rendition of classic D&D 3.5 edition as a baseline, and includes whatever additions can be effectively (and not too ludicrously) included; basically whatever players want that also makes some sense.
The party has just made some character and story developments. Trump and Tracy discover that when their powers combine they form Captain Planet,... or rather, Tracy gets uber-sized and most ferocious.
Infernius and Thez have successfully tracked down and captured a Dark Elf who had been masquerading as the proprietor of the Bazaar (there is no proprietor) who were responsible for jacking all their shit.
What happens next? I have some idea, which probably means its not going to go anywhere near how I expect.
808 replies and 47 files omitted.
>>24545 →"Good morning, ~Flashy."
>>24548"Good morning, pony"
He is smiling, reasonably happy, but holding your sword for... Some reason
>>24545 →>implying she'd be the first upI woke up this morning in someone else's bed, so it fits
>>24549*smiles and stretches happily*
"~Hmmmm..! What a lovely night that was..
Are you ready to head back now, ~Flashy?"
>>24551"What a lovely night indeed, sure."
\r
>>24553"Unless you want to do something else first"
>>24555"I'm fine.. dreadfully hungry though..
What about you?"
>>24556"Trips demand that I do what I am about to do"
Tracy has evidently reverted to pony form I the night as she slept. Trumpaladin takes Tracy, and with one hand knocks her on the ground, and then rolls her on her back. With the other, he takes Korak's sword and points it at her neck, eventually positions himself over her with the sword right at her throat
>>24556Here's hoping that Players have as much leftover TksG turkey as there is in-game leftover Roc. ^_^
>>24557Oh, this again..... e_e
*stares*
[confused pony noises]
I'm not going to bother rolling for reflex. This had better be good.
>>24557>>24556He now takes the tip of the sword, move it up a bit, and the taps her nose with it lightly
"Boop"
He removes the inhibiting clothing and then begins to ravish her
"Sorry Tracy but I feel life I've never done this properly"
>>24560I'll have you know, I spent over a half-hour autistically hammering on F5 last night just to see if Trump was going to kill her in her sleep,....
Moar coffee
>>24560.. Okay.
"..U-unf..!"
Can we fast-forward through this part, please?I want to type-out some preparations for the Saturday game, and it's slightly inconvenient if the ERP gets in the way.. I've noted everything on the charts.
>>24563Its not as satisfying if you fast-forward, ever seen Click? Xp
>>24562He increase speed and intensity, and brings himself closer to her, first moving the sword from a thrusting threat to a throat slicing threat, then putting it to the side nearer the end
He finishes in the pony with a soft, sort of ironically said "yippee aye ay," puts clothing back on, and then sheathes the sword, and hands it to her
>>24561I wasn't intending on doing this last night. The idea just came to me this morning
>>24563>doesn't want ERPKek. This is the >rape board, you don't have a choice in this
But sure, just say he rode her back or they walked back or he called Fae or something
>>24565[gasping pony noises]
*accepts sword and hobbles to her feet, slowly growing into her warhoers form*
"Ha.. L-let's.. let's head back.." *gasps*
>is now fully awake>>24567I just don't have the time for something long like last night...
>>24568*rides horse*
"Alright, let's go. Food does sound good. Maybe you can make those giant eggs into omelettes or something"
>>24568thats fine, I was going to make it one post but then thought to make it more than one to see how you'd respond
>>24569>cook the eggs[ironic laughter]
*speeds off*
>Fast travel to tower
>>24569>>24571<Fooomp> With a movement rate of 90 (and that's at 1x speed, Tracy can go up to 3x) you'll be back in no time.
>>24572In her Nightmare form, how many times can she be spurred to increase her speed before she is kill?
Also, what are the combat benefits to increased speed?
>>24573Cauchemars have like 158 hp so my guess is a lot. Maybe more if she recieves a Paladin's lay hands
>Arrives at tower
*checks on eggs*
>>24573>benefitsRight. The penalties are as follows:
- No dex bonus to AC
- Start run at 2x speed, increasing multiplier each round (
after passing a DC10 Constitution check). Even if passing that check, character can only run as many rounds as their constitution score (Tracy-Mar can run for 24 rounds at a max of 3x cuz armor)
*prepares camomile tea*
Goes to see Slovenia
"How was your day yesterday?"
*offers tea*
"You should join us for breakfast"
>>24576Does her armor count as light, or medium?
>>24575Trollestia is sitting regally (and a bit comically) atop the eggs, while little japanese characters have been drawn in the dirt with incense sticks placed around it. Also one of those rectangle-banner-things is wrapped around them.
>>24578Medium, because of the skull-breastplate (also, there's that Paladin in heavy armor she's carrying)
>>24577"Thats very thoughtful. My day was uneventful, apparently the Mill hasn't been operating the past 2 days because of some hooman tradition of gorging themselves on bomb-ass food," she sighs. "Oh well, that just means this next week will be extra,... taxing," she says with a bit of a sadistic gleam in her eye.
>>24579Idk.. but she's wearing something
A single rider counts as a light load, right?
If she took off the bone-armor, could she travel at 5x her land speed?
>>24580"They've been closed? Well we'll have to fix that. I'll think about opening your own little mill up here if we can find a stream for a water mill, that way you don't have to be quite as reliant on others"
Smiles deviously
"But I trust you will make the fullest use of this well rested labor force, back from vacation"
>>24580*eye twitches for fleeting moment, before passing*
>Is slightly-irked at seeing troll sitting on her eggs, but deep down knows she can trust her".. H-how are they?"
>>24583"They're moving around a bit, so the ninja-fag put the banner around to keep them from rolling off. If they were chickens I would say only a day or so,... but I have no idea the gestation period of Rocs so we'll have to wait and see."
>>24584".. If, if you would..?"
*gestures to move aside*
>>24583dont put up with her shit, show the mother fucker who is boss and whose eggs those arethis is still weird as hell to me. They are fucking birds. Either set them next to a fire or let them die, it's not worth nine hours a day of this
>>24585"And if I don't?" she smirks, but moves away after stalling just long enough to make Tracy think she won't.
>>24586>this cunt>*steam whistles out of nostrils**takes her place on the egg-bed, letting out a content, super-heated sigh; the feeling of the eggs beneath her calm her down*
>*Room turns into a sauna*
>>24588Why do you have infinite space heater powers again?
>>24590Because it's funny and cute.
>>24582"Oh yes, certainly. Bitches always have a tendency to try and drag out the experience of celebration and frivolity long after it has expired. It will be fun breaking them back in," she says with a wink while sipping her tea.
"Besides, this has given me the chance to plot out exactly the number of pieces we'll need for each device. How many are we building exactly?"
>>24590A creative interpretation of the flaming-pony action.
GM, has Trumpaladin been informed of Durpistan?
>>24593I don't think so. I don't think he even knows there's a city in that direction.
>>24593Not to my knowledge, though I have no idea what ideas or conversation may have gone on between last night and this morning.
>>24594You had one job Tracy!
>>24596He didn't ask.
Tracy didn't bring it up, because all she knew was that it was some boring city with a shitty economy; she wouldn't care to speak about it unless the subject came up in conversation.
>>24592>tfw even when she's psycho and you know she's being a slave driver you still find her antics adorable"That's... Hard to say, honestly. We will need Something with a massive range, because we will want to keep it out of the range of enemy return fire. We will need something mobile enough to be pulled down slender forest roads and go on ships. We'll need it to be able to sling solid rock with force against city walls, groups of rock against infantry, and flaming projectiles against flammable targets.
As for how many... Well... Tourcil will probably want his own team, and a second to be lead by me or also under tourcil should the order of battle be divided as such, but in any event as a back up, or to add more force. Let's go with two if possible, for now."
Trumpaladin smiles, again kind of deviously, and then places one hand
behind her head on her neck fingers in her mane, and with another hand holds her hoof up
"I understand that what I have just asked of you is, I engineering terms, to square the circle. I have made requests that it seems cannot at once be fulfilled as they seem mutually exclusive with one another. But no one said living a second life was easy. I believe in two scoops, that you can have both. Embrace the challenge, because I think you can overcome it"
\r
>>24598Scratch "hand behind head in mane." She's not a dog
\r
Where does Ponimaru usually spend his time anyway? Is he just always hiding?
>>24598Not a slave driver, a "Difficult and demanding taskmaster"
"Trebuchets will certainly offer massive range, but they aren't the most readily mobile. Perhaps each Trebuchet should be accompanied by a cannon or two? Ballistae would work also, but the beams required for each shot are similar to the ones required for the trebuchet, which would significantly increase our timber resource consumption. Catapults likewise, though not quite as consumptive. Unless we're taking cannons from the Cunt, we'll need more iron to fabricate more."
>>24597>boring cityIt's a mining town!
>with a boring economyIt's a communist place that needs to be freedomized!
>he didn't askNo shit because he doesn't know what to ask. The purpose of the group rogue is to gather information and communicate that, damn it!
https://youtu.be/G0-VTPYXvfc
>>24600He has a number of tasks that have been delegated to him. He runs errands for Ben, supervises the Fight Club (when Thez is absent/occupied), trains and practices independently, but yes he does alot of hiding also.
>>24601"I'm sorry, did you say, 'cannons'?"
His facial expression turns into pic related
>>24604"Well yes, cannons. A trebuchet is an effective long-range weapon, but is very slow and non-maneuverable. The team operating it would be sitting ducks if an opponent were to get within its range, and if you're planning a war campaign you can't expect a player to always be on hand. Cannons would help to alleviate the risk."
>>24605"I see. I'll look into taking the cannons from the ship. As for catapults, what are their comparative advantages?"
Tracy is still sitting on her eggs peacefully, sharpening her knives and preparing her BG spells.
>>24606"Not much vs. cannons, except they use rocks as projectiles
cheap, abundant, and they don't explode when they roll a 1"
"Though, cannons tend to be more accurate and consistent, given that each projectile is of a standardized size and shape. Still, catapults can fire burning pitch in addition to rocks, and the occasional crazy person can use them to launch people,... I don't recommend that."
Can she sew the cloak while she's sitting?>>24609We could cast Contagion on corpses, and hurl them over castle walls to spread the plague.
>>24608>cannons explode on you"I like it. I'm still going to recommend we make a trebuchet, so that way we will have a siege engine for use against fixed fortifications. But making a catapult is or ballista is a good idea as well. Let's say make a ballista. I'll look into taking the cannons from the ship.
So... What do we need to make and operate our own cannons again?"
Marks note in his journal that Inferius is completely banned from operating cannons
>>24610>cloakSure
>corpsesOf course
sooooo ebil>>24611"But, I just said ballistae aren't,... okay,...." she shrugs. "If you're sourcing the cannons from the ship, all you will need is people familiar with their operation. You don't happen to have any pirates lying around do you?"
>>24612*is sewing cloak, thankful for Kefka's hand*
Did Inferius bother to keep that Dow's hand, btw?
>>24613He never said anything, so I'm guessing no.
>>24612"Alright then, a catapult it is rather than a ballista"
"Pirates? But of course I keep pirates around. I never throw anything useful away. The only thing I'm lacking right now is a cleric to calm them and money to pay them"
>>24614What a waste..
Also, could've used it to persuade the Drow.
Does a Bag of Holding function the same way the spell Secret Chest does?
>>24617I'm not sure what you're getting at with that question. In what capacity? Are you asking if the bag remains in ethereal stasis when not in use, retrievable only by a miniature replica?
>>24618>WiFi cut outThe second part.
Does the bag reside in another plane?
>>24619No, the bag is a material item that contains an extra-dimensional space. That space is entirely closed and sealed off when not open or in use (meaning, living things placed in the bag
do need some sort of apparatus), but the space is not transverseable or detectable except through opening the device.
>>24620So the space within the bag is its own dimension then? It's not on another plane, but is its own plane in an of itself?
*Tracy is reading a book on The Planes, interested in the subject*
>>24622I get it now. Thanks.
Also, since Etherealness requires an affected subject to shift willingly, if objects on an unaware individual we're touched by the caster, could said objects be stolen off of their person?
GM, does Slovenia think that an order of one trebuchet and one catapult is prudent, or is that met as questionable?
>>24625As in, could you touch an apple in someone's hand, make it ethereal, and effectively make that object vanish into thin air?
>>24625>>24627No. You have to be physical to interact with physical objects. When ethereal you are highly limited in what you can perceive from the material plane, and unable to interact in any way.
>>24626"That depends on the size of the war campaign. If you're looking for an edge against a small group or faction, that would be sufficient, but if the group/faction has seige engines of its own, you'll need more."
>>24628Okay. What if you touched the object while physical, and then became ethereal?
>>24629Depends on the circumstance. If you're standing in a pub, grab an apple, and then go ethereal, no issue there. If you're fighting with someone and you grab something they're wearing, or their weapon or w/e, no you can't just ethereal-steal it. You have to have uncontested control of an item to bring it with you, and even then there's limitations for size (Thez couldn't <whooof> the Roc corpse, for example, which though a different ability/effect, is governed by the same rules).
What if you snuck up on an individual while material and grabbed said object without them knowing? With a Slieght of hand check, couldn't you steal the shirts off of their backs (metaphorically and physically)?
>>24631Aside from the fact that stealing and poofing are both standard actions (meaning, not in the same round) yes, it is theoretically possible.
What about leaving object on someone's person? Dropping an object is a free action and etherealness ceases as contact does, so could you use the ability to place objects in empty chamber, like bags or anything else with an open space large enough to hold the object?
>>24628"Well, I can't honestly say exactly what is needed. As of now, I think we can anticipate both needing to attack fixed strong enemy positions from a distance, and also attacking light enemy targets under circumstances that we can be counter attacked easily. I guess I will have to say we should build one trebuchet and one catapult, while investigating canons. Report progress to me.
Thank you for all of your help and input.
\r
>>24632>>24633>trying to get around creative use of all of the skills available to a level 12 rogue with 186 skill points by some bs infinite teleportation
>>24635I reap what I sow.
>>24633Except that dropping objects while ethereal leaves them on the ethereal plane, and the ratio of space is not 1 to 1. Meaning, you can't drop an object 2" from above a chest and have it appear 2" above the chest if it were even possible to do that in the first place. This is also why sneak attacks (or coordinated attacks) from the Ethereal plane are impossible except to creatures that have naturally developed the skill over time (filchers, phase spiders, etc.).
>>24635I know, I'm on it.
>>24634"Lovely, will do."
>>24636>Tracy is preparing to reap a cloak ha!
>>24637So, other monsters with the ability are capable of it, because they're experienced in using it?
>>24639That, and they're not trying to sheist their way into excessive abilities. e_e
>>24640Okay...
>wanted to leave needles/shurikens in victims stomachs to cause them to die as painfully as possible without knowing what happened or to do
>>24641No e_e, I only allowed it with the Terrasque becase A. it has a much larger volume gut, and B. 'cuz you rolled a 20 (it was going to backfire horribly otherwise)
>>24642Oh, okay.
It worked out better than I thought it did then, despite not accomplishing anything.
>>24638>>24636>>24637Trumpaladin goes to find the other pony. He arrives to find her in the stables
"Little pony"
He shows his hand to make sure she sees that he is in fact wearing the ring
"I just found out from your friend that Korak's ship did indeed have cannons. Do you have any informational gifts for me, little pony"
Flashes eyes
"Impress me, if you can"
>>24644[confused pony noises]
"What do you mean by 'gifts'? Is there anything in particular you want to talk about?"
>>24645"Slovenia surprised me with the cannons bit. I would not have thought to ask for that had she not have mentioned it when she declined a request for a god-tier trebuchet. You tend to be full of surprises. Surprise me"
>>24646"Thought you would've seen them on the ship last time, but sure.
she doesn't give a shit about this topic, but I know that's what you're looking forDid you see that weird city to the north? It has canons too, pointed at the mountains for some reason."
*steam rises off of comfy pony*
I miss my wifi...
>>24647gems would have been much better info, honestly"City? What city? I know nothing."
my internet sucks too
"That ring-shaped city on the other side of the mountain. It seems odd, but there doesn't look like very much activity either."
>>24650Are you doing this on purpose?
>>24650"Can you tell me anything about this city's inhabitants? What about any other locations in the area?"
why are you so stingy with information? You stand nothing to benefit, and it probably harms you in the long run. All it does is drag out meta gaming and makes me ask more questions to get the same information, which is miserable when my internet doesn't work
>>24652GM leans over "Your line is: "Its a communist mining city."
>>24653I was telling it how I thought she would. She doesn't find the topic to be very interesting."I don't know very much about them, but from the books it seems like some kind of isolated mining community. They don't seem to like outsiders very much. I think they might be commies or something. Seems pretty boring to me, imo."
*Offers outdated book*
For the sake of Grace, assume she relayed everything revealed in the last thread, when asked the right questions.
still phone-posting, waiting for wifi to work...
>>24655>>24656*urge to kill Bolsheviks rises*
He's really fucking weirded out by the steam, it's just so unnatural
"Alright, thank you"
Trumpaladin now goes to see Thez
Thez is still waiting for Infernius to wake his bull-ass up, since he bothered to comment about her being gone. Not sure where the sexin' took place (the vault? a room? several rooms? on the side of the tower?) but that's where she is.
>>24657Really? THIS is the most unnatural thing he's seen so far?"Okay.. Have a nice day, Flashy."
*Continues sewing cloak while reciting BG incantations*
>>24660*Content sigh*
Can she have the materials for a Ring of Animal Friendship ordered? (It seems like the most appropriate thing to put on her clasper, even if it doesn't work for her)
>>24659he never liked her transformation, everHe's going to find out about the gems from someone else nowI have the perfect revenge for that, so it's okay I guess>>24658To Thez
"I thinkInferius followed the lead on Ben's missing gold to the bazaar. I haven't seen him since, but he normally talks to you, so... Did he find anything?"
>>24662Bring her the guy's hand.
>>24661Clasper? Like a shark penis? I hope she doesn't have one of those
I'm sure Infernius wouldn't have just dropped the hand somewhere. Let's say he took it with him.
They could've set it in front of him during the night so that he could watch it ooze, knowing that each moment it's not attached to him makes it less and less likely to be reattached.
>>24662Thez gets up and heads toward Trump, who is clearly indicating a desire to speak with her, probably by calling out or some other obvious effort.
"Yes, he was able to determine one of the Dark Elves was actually that bald fellow who had been leading characters around in the Bazaar. We have him tied up in the vault for safe keeping. We haven't interrogated him yet, though he did lose a hand in the process of chasing him down and capturing him. He hasn't said much of anything except cheek, but his name is Darkemter Vrees. This is the first I've seen him in this reboot, but our paths have crossed in previous."
>>24665Lets say he didn't, cuz he's not into hoarding body parts, and since parts can be mended, regenerated, or outright restored (entertron, etc.) there'd be no point.
>>24666Ebil checked
Okay..
Use detect evil if necessary to find her. Jesus, walky-talkies are the most useful equipment we could possibly get the group. I'd rather have it than guns. At least pigeons that could track people and not just . I'd rather have super-homing pigeons than guns, and goddamn I'd love a Thompson sub-machine-gun. Like seriously, canwe get WW1 homing pigeons but magically enchanted or something to be able to seek out persons?
"You crossed paths with him before? What do you know about him?"
>>24668"He's a pompous asshole for one, and avoids conflict if at all possible. He's got some kind of suit, blessed by Spooder,... excuse me,... Lloth, that allows him to chameleon with his surroundings, and his stealth ability rivals my own. Beyond that, he's an excellent assassin, both in temperment and skill, but one should never
ever fully trust him."
>>24668>Pigeons that can be taught to trackI already looked into that: only animals with Scent can be trained to do that...
Of course, there's a spell for everything too.
Pls let Tracy know when the interrogation is about to start
>>24671Trollestia quips "I'll get right on it," rolling her eyes.
>>24671Hell yes I'd tell Tracy
>>24669"So I'm guessing he knows what happened to Ben's gold?"
>>24672"..I'll be right back."
>fast travel to the vault or wherever"Did I hear something about an elf who won't open his mouth?"
>tfw no wifi so can't use the custom reaction images I shopped for this
>>24674"Its a safe assumption. Whether he'll admit to it or give any information out is another matter," she shrugs.
>>24675No she hasn't heard. She has not been told yet
>>24677Say she followed him, and overheard.
>Pony senses
>>24676*goes to the vault to check on him*
*returns almost immediately*
"Where the fuck is the gold?"
>>24679"Oh yes, that. It seems that Ben wasn't the only one who has been robbed recently. Don't tell Lenos, he'll be MAD."
>>24679*Is in the next room, evesdropping*
>>24678Bullshit, she stayed on the eggs because that's what she does and you should have said that 30 minutes ago.
Mention the gems you kike
>>24682>"Sorry. I revived the tarrasque, but you'll forgive me, right?"How do you want it?
[4d20 = 35]>>24680"Aww hell no!"
Goes into vault
"Where's the fucking money?"
Draws out letter opener, the keened one
"Where is our money you sand nigger!"
Stab, stab, stab, stab, because damn I wanted to do this. Target is legs.
>>24684Aside from wincing with each stab, he seems thoroughly unimpressed. "Greetings "fine sir". A pleasure to meet you."
Thez <whooof> appears. "Careful not to cut the bindings, we wouldn't want him getting away,... again."
>>24684*Phases into the room*
"What's going on here~?"
>>24687Thez whispers "Trump is trying to intimidate him with a letter opener."
"Flashy, why didn't you tell me about this? You know I'm good at these kinds of things."
*Draws wicked-looking curved dagger*
>>24683She could say the following and get a pat on the head:
As he's leaving the room, she can say to him
"You're worried about money, Flashy? Don't be. Remember how I said "I have assets"? Thez left a number of gems to me, and I wanted to keep them in reserve, in case she changed her mind or we had a situation like this one. Unfortunately that weird dog from a few days ago tore through the place I was keeping them - you know, out of sight from people like him. They could still be retrieved though if you're willing to sift through the dirt. In a cavern off the ant cave - dog killed them, unfortunately. Now, is this guy bothering you?"
>>24690I'll deal with that later. Let me play with the elf first.
>>24689>>24685"Nice to meet you again as well. Now, I know for this I'm supposed to take you to the sunny paradise of Cuba first, but I'm a bit short on resources. Meet my associate, Tracy Cage. She will be taking over from here"
Leaves room, saying something to Tracy as necessary
Oh yeah. Cast ZONE OF TRUTH
Thez thinks for a moment. "Interrogating him won't work, nor will diplomacy; he'll just goad you into killing him. He's a bit of a nihilist, has been ever since he showed up here (and probably long before). I recommend starving him for a few days."
>>24686"Why not just cut his feet off then? We could heal him to regenerate skin over the wound."
>>24687>phasingGo through the open door and stop trying to be haxxor
>>24695It's more fun this way though...
>>24694"That would keep him from running off, sure. It won't loosen his tongue however." True
D> "And look at you all, rubbing your brain-cells together! Do let me know if there's a spark, I'd love to hear about it!" False
>>24693"How long until his friends show up for the rescue effort? Any other bait we can use?"
>>24693>His goal is to goad you into killing him"Well, then that means we can have some fun with him for a while until he decides to talk."
>>24697*Carefully rolls-up the drops pants*
>>24697"That's fine. I'm in no hurry after all."
*sizes up elf, as if inspecting an expensive slab of meat*
"No hurry at all.."
>>24698"I doubt they will, Dark Elves have no loyalty to one another. I'm sure they're making every effort to be certain he
can't lead us back to them." True
"If we had anything of significant and obvious value, we could attempt to bait them, but other than what we have on us, I doubt it would be enough considering the amount of wealth they've already stolen. We'd be better off scoping out places that have an existing cache of wealth and fine equipment." True
>>24699"Uhm,...."
>>24700>>24699"Cut him or burn him or whatever, but
you are not allowed to rape anyone anymore"
Shows ring to her
>>24702"Existing wealth? Where are we going to find that?
...
Any chance Korak knows where to find the Drow?"
>>24704"Fugged if I know!" (to both) True
"Now.."
*cuts both Achilles tendons*
"Wouldn't want you running off now. It's been a while since I've had a chance to do this, and you came at just the right time."
>>24703"Oh, I know. I had some more ~interesting things planned..."
*Licks blade edge*
>>24706"Easy on the foreskin darling," he smirks. Its almost like he doesn't feel pain.
What's he wearing, btw? Any place he could be hiding items that he could use to slip away?
>>24707>Sand-nigger>ForeskinI really wish I could do this on my laptop...
[1d20 = 4]
Sense motive on Sand person
>>24708He's veritably bundled in rope. "No, we retrieved his weapons (a fine rapier, and a short-sword), but he was not suited for venturing when we found him so his other 'tools' are probably being kept elsewhere," Thez sighs. "Watch out for these little guys also," she says squishing a tiny spider that had wandered out of the bindings and was working its way down the chair leg.
"Sorry spooder," she genuinely says.
>>24710This faggot has maxed-out bluff. There's no way that'll help.
This could take days.
Waiting on that clothing description.
>>24711What about his clothes?
>>24712Its a fine mesh of intricate webbing, occasionally linked at points with some form or other of exotic metals. Its unlike anything seen previously, though for the meta-player comparison, it is very much like the Dark Spider-man suit.
FYI, I'm about to cripple him so he can't get away, but I want to know what he's wearing first so I won't fuck up when the bindings are cut.
>>24715You mean beyond cutting his achilles?
D> "Where DID you find these two? And that Bull-fellow? I say the God's must have lowered their expectations to endorse this lot for the Game," he says to Thez
>>24715>>24716To Thez and to Tracy
"You know, I'm not skilled in the art of inflicting suffering, nor am I really allowed to engage in such things. But if I were, I would say you should strip him completely naked and lower the temperature of the room, so he is deprived of dignity, cold, and most importantly, we could loot him"
>>24714*Pulls out hammer from the forge*
>SLAM>SLAM*Breaks both shins halfway below the knee*
"You won't be needing these anymore."
*Takes dagger and slowly amputates 1/3 of each leg, between the broken bones*
"We'll save those for later..
Flashy, if you would..?"
*Gestures to paladin to regenerate skin over remainder of legs*
>>24718Trumpaladin uses LAY HANDS to regenerate skin
>>24716"Thez, um, do we have any money of any kind left anywhere? I think I might need some for display purposes. Just a lot of gold coins to look impressive, or maybe gems, not actually anything more than say 1000gp"
>>24718As the flesh is rent, the suit mends over the wounds. "Oh MY! Careful with the threads!" he says in mock outrage.
>>24717"Uhm,... I'm not sure that will work (looting/stripping). Again, I suggest starving him," Thez responds.
>>24719"Considering what they've already stolen, I doubt that would garner a response from his cohorts, especially since they no doubt know we have him. Its a shame no one has done any research into the various communities and might have stumbled across some mention of a city relatively nearby that is swimming in wealth, cuz that would be damn useful."
>>24720"I wasn't intending on getting the gold for the elves, but now that you mention it..."
"Yeah, but starving him will take days"
>>24720>suit mendsLOOT HIM
>>24722You'll have to untie him to do that
>>24723I'm not doing that until I know Tracy has disabled him and until I can cast a magic resistant circle. Can Paladins cast circles that are zero-magic zones?
>>24720Upon seeing the wounds heal, the pale pony giggles like a filly in a candy store
"We are going to have so much
fun tonight."
*lets loose with the hammer all over his legs*
>>24725*hands fire iron to pony*
>>24725I didn't say they heal, I said that the suit mends its self over the wound.
>>24724Newp
>>24720*produces cleaver*
"If I chopped your legs off, would you die?"
>>24727Break all the bones in his legs.
Cut off his feet.
>>24728"Please, you haven't the stomach for that sort of method,..."
"He's just provoking you,...." Thez warns.
>>24729Didn't you just cut off 1/3 of his legs a few posts ago?
GM wishes Thez - or anyone else in the room - had an appreciation for the degree of torture invulnerability that most high-ranking Dark Elves are forced to endure/learn so we could be past all this,....
>>24730"Thez, I was hoping to make a trip to Spinitar or the Court City soon. Now that you mention Cardishore, add that to the list. Just scouting and diplomacy, nothing serious. I was going to ask Inferius if I could borrow Uatchit for the journey. Since he is unavailable, is there a horse I can borrow for the journey? Something reasonably fast, but doesn't scream 'I am dangerous, and by the way, here is what I can use to hurt you if you want to attack me.'
>>24731>>24730Shhh! Let Tracy have her fun
>>24730>Not getting the Bane joke*blank expression* (she really wants to know if she can cut them off without losing her toy)
"Well? Would you?" she inquires in monotone
>>24733*pets pony*
"Don't worry sweetie, if he does die, I can resurrect him so you can kill him again. And he'll be in a state of hysteria the whole time too."
>>24733"Would you be so kind? Please, don't stop on my account," he replies.
>>24732"Fine, but this is getting nowhere." then to Tracy. "Make sure that you don't loosen his bindings, no matter how much you cut him up," then back to Trump. "There's Trollestia, but Slovenia and Ponimaru are probably too small. I could take you quite quickly if you don't mind the wind messing up your hair, but I can't guarantee I'd be much use once there. Why not Fae anyway?"
>>24736That IS a retarded idea! I already said, its the suit - not the dude - who is regenerating.
Speaking of which, he slips into unconsciousness. (He's been bleeding this whole time)
>>24737ReEEEEEEEE don't die on me!
Is he unconscious yet? Can I take his pants?
Also, is the vault door closed?
>>24737Lay Hands on elf to keep him from bleeding to death
>why not Fae"Simple. We defeated the Rats, Soros, and Kefka, for absolutely no other reason than that they underestimated what they were up against. What has been accomplished by accident,I now intend. If I am ambushed or attacked, I want the first time they learn I can summon an enhanced dragonne - or a friggin' cauchemar - to be when claws and flaming hooves are in their faces, and I am already flying away. I can summon either almost at will anyways.
Just taking me straight there would be fine.
Tracy can come too, if she wants, although she needs to remain innocuous"
\r
>>24738Yes, he is unconscious. You'll have to untie him in order to take his pants. Yes, the vault is closed.
>>24740>>24738"I want his Rapier and suit... I like fashion and I need a weapon that can do piercing damage..."
>>24741Thez' eye twitches, before reiterating "DON'T untie him, you'll probably regret it," True
>>24741>fashion>gross spider jumpsuitYou've got a fancy chainshirt suit, but I won't object..
I g2g for a bit.. sorry..
>>24742"Alrighty then..."
*does not untie him*
>>24738"Don't untie him Tracy"
>>24743It's a gross spider jumpsuit? Eww. Nevermind
>>24744Thez breathes a sigh of relief. "So then, assuming that no one disturbs what will very shortly be his corpse, he's probably going nowhere. I'm not sure how he did it, but he's escaped literal death before. I'd say he's a vampire, but he scoffed at a rebuke attempt by an exceptionally outranking caster. Although, if he's dead then hunger won't weaken his resolve or ability to disregard further interrogation and torture."
>>24746Casts HEAL SERIOUS WOUNDS? HEAL MODERATE WOUNDS?
>>24747Serious is better.
Darkie wakes back up with a start. "Morning already, can't I sleep in a bit? I hope there's tea,...."
>>24748"... Do you like Chamomile?"