/vx/ - Videogames and Paranormal

>>187645
>The bartender raises an eyebrow
<Ah heard of the Apple family, but Ah'm drawing a blank ona Silver Star. A pleasure te meet ye miss Fair. Me name is Addy, welcome to the Loser's Club. Let me knaur whatcher fancy is, be it food er drink.

I can cool it with the accent, if youre trying to translate :3

>>187646
Shes proportionately comparable to arizona

>>187647
>I can cool it with the accent, if youre trying to translate :3
That's perfectly fine. It's fun. I don't always have to understand. It's fun to discover new weird ways to express English.

>>187649
"Ah, that's fine. I'm not from the Apple family though, that's just on his side. I'm of a one-hundred percent pure unicorn breed," she says and dance a bit on the spot.

Her tail lifts up the cape of her cloak and reveal it's shape. It's like a rope near it's root before it turn into a cotton candy ball of hair, leading into spikes. Her front hooves split just slightly into cloven ones and you can see the almost golden nails on them. Tuffs of fur are just above her hooves.

Then she realize where she is and quickly adds, "Of course, there's nothing wrong with being a dir-mud-earth pony." She clears her throat and grins sheepishly. ^^

"Uhh, anyway. Is beef jerky on the menu?"

>>187650
>weird way for english
Uh, its not a legit way of speaking, its a jumbled mass of accent sterotypes. Its structured so you kinda have to sound it out in your head. Like the Pikey from the mlvie Snatch, if youve seen it.
<We certainly do,... how fresh do ye like yer meat?

>>187649
>Learns she can get to hell through nearby doors.

Fair scrunches.

"Okay, soooo... If I need to go to the little fillies' room, which door do I open so I don't wind up in hell?" Fair asked nervously. ^^

>>187652
She looks mildly amused and tilts her head.

"Oh, you really serve that. Isn't that like cannibalism? Do your serve carnivorous here as well," Fair says and looks over her shoulder looking for her in search for a predator.

>>187656
>>187656
>Well that's an awfully personal question when first meeting a cow,... but yes, cow is delicious

Fair takes a step back in shock.

"What?!" she shouts out, looks around hoping she didn't disturbed any of the other guests, and then continue in lower tone. "Bu-bu-bup. Noway." She regains her confidence. "Your just pulling my hoof. "

She lays her fore-hooves onto the desk between them and leans in. Her eyes are half-lidded and her tongue glazes up her upper lip.

"You know?" she whispers. "I thought the beef jerky was an innuendo or pun for some--" She nods towards Addy."--beef --"She make a masturbatory gesture in the air."--Jerky."

"Is this place not a brothel?"

*Sigh.* I don't know who this character is clearly. Is she a racist or is she a race-mixer. Is she innocent or a pervert. Well, this post will answer that question tho. ^^ Sry. I can't stop myself...

>>187660
^^

She still looks sultry but a playfulness tinge her features.

"Sooo. Who is the better chef, you or Iron Will?" she asks.

<Addy and Fair Apple will have had ample opportunity to finish their conversation, as well as for her to order something - it doesn't have to be beef, theres plenty of vegetable options.
<I hate vegans
>Eventually though,she will have the opportunity to something she hasn't been able to yet.
Describe to a witness what daily service is like in her establishment.
>Opon being reunlocked and opened, through both doors starts streaming one after another of the most foul and infernal creatures you wouldn't,... well,... you WOULD expect streaming in from both the Abyss and the 9 Hells
>There being limited occupancy, the line continues out the door

Assuming Ms. Apple doesn't feel inclined to look in the foyer were she to do so she would see several very large signs laminated to a middle wall. The foyer appears to have been a single room once, but has had a middle divider added, and the whole room appears recently reovated.
<Almost like these mother fuckers can't be trusted to not be playing games and shit. Its not technically fighting in the restaurant!
<Or
Thats a breach of contract!
<Arseholes

The signage is a white background with bold red lettering with a border and swirling designs accenting; it's written in the languages of Common, Abyssal, Diabolical, and Ponish. On either side of the wall is a sign-in book, and the door won't open until the person touching the door has signed.
The signage its self is very intricate, and upon close inspection reveals that the designs and scrollwork, heck even the border is the very microscopic fine print of a very exactingly crafted contract between the proprietor and the customer
>The bartender lowers the lights a bit as customers find their seating, before fading into nearby shadow to appear next to the first table
<Goin' fer anuthur piece a me arse tadey, faggot?
"Excuse me, I'll have you know I underwent conversion therapy; I'm a PROPER catholic!"
<So the brisket then?

>>187661
In that the restaurant was opened "after Addy and Fair Apple finished any resulting conversation", we can continue with the dialogue as previous if you like. However, I will try to have "the bar" open from 2a-6a (my time, sorry >>187655 was 2a my time) and participants will have the option to interact with the other customers, but you will want to read the rules in the foyer
>the rules
Yes, Im working on them, thats why Addy isn't unlocking the doors until after their conversation ^_~

>>187666
Of course I forgot to sage the satan post. Oh well
Each day will be it's own independent episode, though description only occurs when theres a witness, so I won't be bumping this thread except in response, and any further details I add later will be saged. Its basically something there if anon wants something to do, in a roleplay context.

The pic I forgot to reupload

>A sign greets you as (you) approach the bar
PRIVATE ENTRANCE-ONLY EVENT

>>187828
(This is because the dialogue with Fair Apple remains unresolved)

<Not only did ye fook up the hitler trips, but ye posted to the wrong fooking thread!! Me fookin' word yer pathetic!

So, what I tried to say in thr ooc thread, but failed because Im retarded was:
For a multitude of reasons, I am attempting to see how long I can go without posting to the thread, though by proxy this is both proxy to and insular against. Still, 1 time.

To business then. I particularly want to be on hand when Garv is doing his thjng with the guns because Brie has a mix of exposition, theorizing, and cheeky banter in mind. It will be fun, I promise

Yes Elway, the irony isnt lost
https://youtu.be/W_NZnNAMZzg?si=DQFPSw7rNrSHX0hl

https://youtu.be/qbvKh_sJ9y0?si=g6l_bdf2W7KoYMSn
Seriously,....

I put a magnets inna gloves, so I dont have to grip the 'cigarettte" ^_^

Next up is replacement etebrows (theres six magnets in the forehead)

>me right now
https://youtu.be/p8U6x9ClAss?si=bjXh157c_7HMhTuF
Sorry, a filly is no longer and I need a minute

Something I never expected to happen throughout all of this Mlpol-ness was a love of fillies, They're amazing and delightful. Most of the time, but not today.
GOD DAMMIT I DIDN'T ASK FOR THIS TODAY. You have some LOUSY FUCKING TIMING, YOU KNOW THAT? YOU BETTER WATCH AFTER THIS MOTHERFUCKER! REEEEEEEEEEEE!

>snaps fingers
Thez, find him.
<Dude he's gone
>FUCKING FIND HIM ;_;
<On it

>>188000
I don't know what happened and I have no wise words to tell but I'm here with love if nothing else. <3

>>188002
Thanks fren

Btw, the line is "down from evertide"

THIS IS FUCKING WHY. IF U WANNA KNOW, THIS IS FUCKING WHY. ISTFG NONE OF YOU. NO, I WILL BOX GOD ON THIS. NOT THESE ONES.
<yer pardon, Ninjas is... compromised for the day ^_^

This is all in honor of beefilly. Ngl, Im a mess

Nevetmind, its fine. He escaped the game. Yes. The one u just lost. No, not stratego.

https://boards.4chan.org/mlp/thread/41875345
Tribute thread

>bartender flicks her cellphone a couple times
"What?"
https://youtu.be/5EXFilTUiko?si=wb9FwAIxca-BEb3z

<So how much a the neighbor-cow-burger are we takin?
Im confused by the question. Why divide from a sum 1 quantity?

So this AirBnB cost $160/ night; more than I've ever paid (including one time I got a whole ass house with 2 queen bedrooms, a kitchen, patio, fenced yard,...) but it's an upscale apartment with a balcony, roof pool skyline,... perfect for a chain-smoker. The listing describes the place as having ammenities for children, a kitchen, and on-site garage parking (for a not unreasonable rate). The listing DID say that guests are only to use the master bedroom, and that the room (with the implication being INSIDE) allowed no smoking. So we get here and I talk to Leon, the lady's husband who is working the front desk. That was my first clue, but I missed it. I ask him "Yo the room, I won't be smoking inside,I just wanna hang off the balcony so I'm not driving other guests/residents nuts with my late-night antics.
First, he says "Yeah that's fine, you good. Just make sure to prop one of the chairs against the door so the smoke doesnt seep in, cuz the seals on the sliding door aren't any good. But you can smoke weed too if you want, I do."
So we're like "fucking a". And then I REITERATE my plan to cook up some carnitas (which is fucking ruined btw). She said in messages "You can use the kitchen and the pots, pans, just clean up before you leave." I mention this to Leon, who says "If she said it was okay, that's fine."

My beaner and I go back down to get all our shit with a filly fren, at which point I explain "He's just helping us pack all this stuff up, he isn't staying with us (I have a tote full of furry shit, et al).
So we go up and explore the place a bit. This kitchen is fucking PACKED. I've never SEEN an AirBnB so well stocked! They have EVERYTHING.
There's 2 kids beds, theres scooters and a tricycle, and even an electric scooter. I'm blown away, I though I had lucked out.
So we smoke a blunt, and I smoke a few cigarettes (a total of a little over an hour) and we're getting ready to head back to the con. While we're standing in the middle of the living room, Leon just walks right in. I'm like, hold up what? He starts telling me that he can smell the smoke from the hallway, and he has to aire out the room because they live there normally, and all this about "only smoke on the roof patio". I'm like "Okay, sorry, I did exactly what you asked. He gos "Yeah, but its too potent, I'm gonna stay and air the place out. Before you go, can you pick up all this stuff (My fursut, set on nearby furniture, as well as a few bottles of alcohol). Our daughters will be here later.

Hold up,... what? Still didn't click. I'm like "Thats fine, we wont be back until way late. So, we get some stuff for our car, and like an idiot I left my cell phone in the car, still at the place (which is about 4 blocks from the hotel). We realize this halfway to the hotel, but I recall that the phone only had 5% power so I wouldn't be able to use it much without a charging cable, and that assumes there's a wall adaptor (which I don't have with me cuz the room advertized usb ports which there were).
So I go "Nah, I'll just leave it. It will be an excell ent exercise in discipline to go basically the whole night without trying to hyperfixate on my phone every 5 minutes.
So we go off and do a bunch of fun shit, fillies are great, and it was one of the most exciting and genuinely enjoyable experiences I've had since Mixed Nuts. And so at around 1:30 we return to the place.
Now let me picture the scene: The door to the children's bedroom was closed, Leon is sitting on the floor, and his wife is in a robe with a bath towel wrapped around her head, and they're watching TV.

THEY WANTED US TO PAY $160 A NIGHT FOR JUST THE FUCKING MASTER BEDROOM. WHILE THEY WERE SLEEPING IN THE NEXT FUCKING ROOM. WITH THEIR KIDS AN ADDITIONAL DOOR DOWN. AND HE WAS "GOING TO SLEEP ON THE FLOOR". OH AND GET THIS! I BROUGHT A BOX OF .38 SPECIAL ALONG WITH THE REQUISTE PIECE. I STASHED THE BOX IN ONE OF MY FURSUIT FEET BEFORE I LEFT. THE BOX WAS FUCKING GONE, AND I LOCKED IT IN THE BEDROOM.

But I digress. She reads me and my friend the riot act about not being able to get ahold of me, about not cleaning the kitchen before leaving (she meant before leaving the APARTMENT, not before leaving DALLAS)m about leaving my shit strewn across the living room, about the nicotine residue that the "few cigarettes I smoked causing tobacco resin on the walls", about NOT using the kitchen, and about having unauthorized guests (which apparently means "ANYONE AT ALL, FOR ANY REASON".
Oh, and they have a no refunds policy.

Those niggers planned this. They planned to be able to sleep in their bed after taking my money and kicking us out. AND WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING BULLETS?? The piece is secure, but what the fuck???

FUCK AIRBNB

The bartender sits on a stool, inclined forward and propped on the bar. Dour-faced, she observes a random feed from one of the TVs as the front doors (the hell side) CLAP open with the sudden arrival of an anon who is already in the middle of a ranting tirade against someone over a cell phone

"... because thats all it fucking takes. Trust me. I wrote the contract myself. That's right. Look all you have to do is anytime you get a customer, go get yourself a motel nearby so you can be on hand. Oh, right, your husband works there, even better. So after you get those ratings, we'll flip the script on them and evict every additional tenant for whatever reason. We can make them up if we have to. That's right. Of course you can launder the money through your dispensary business! Yes, the one you openly display and tell your husband to be all friendly about to your tenants. Yeah, don't you worry, you'll still be able to sleep at night, and I will too. God bless!" finally ends the man with his fucking phone conversation. The irritation of having to listen to only one side of a conversation when you don't know/care of/for either party.
"Terribly sorry Ma'am,... miss," he says looking up confused, as though he expected to see something other than a cow on the other side of the equation. The bartender's right hand drifts toward her lower back
<Mate, ye done me a solid, naer need te apologize
And she draws the BIGGEST FUCKING HANDCANNON YOU HAVE EVER SEEN.
No, seriously, this was a thing. It was designed to be a single-use (like a flare gun) pistol that fired a 30mm (yes, the one from the vulcan) bullet. That's the one that almost tore her goddamn arm off. It's okay, she also regenerates. In slow motion, she pulls, swivels, and levels this monstrosity.

KAPLOW
Having shot the previous prototype, she had the good sense to not try and actually HOLD the weapon (its more of a pinch between the lower-thumb palm and the forefinger) this version did cut off her forefinger as it spun out of her hand. Regardless, the motherfucking Saul Goodman-ass lawyer who trained/prepped this griefing-ass nigger-bitch just got a faceful of not enough, and someday he's gonna be in my house.

No no, let me explain better, now that I've had an actual night's sleep. The descriptions are just vague ENOUGH and accurate ENOUGH. The pictures are just depictive ENOUGH. I'm sure if I tried to drag it out with airBnB I would end up with more shit in my mouth, as plenty of malevolent and/or skilled and dutiful lawyers have guided these niggers in this process. I have zero confidence that my upset emotions and "clever wit" will be sufficient to get any amount of reimbursement from any party, and that's assuming I have yet located the phone from which to pursue such actions!

Any idea how weird it is for an insomniac to wake up, have to feed his cats, go back to sleep, and have to feed his cats again 12 hours later? And then go back to sleep? Fucking nuts.

Not gonna lie, these niggers were smart. Taking the box of bullets - while a crime - is alot less severe than taking the gun. It deprives me of the ability to reload (assuming I would go postal, which honestly didn't even cross my mind fwiw, as weird as I can be) but avoids the multiple felonies involved with unauthorized possession and/or unloading, as well as privacy and other laws associated with entering my room without cause. They knew there was a gun, I walked in the front door wearing it openly above muh dick; who knows, the presence of the gun may have saved me from a much worse outcome. Yes, it could have caused a much worse outcome, being out of my possession, but thats why next con I'ma have one of those pepper paintball pistols so I don't have to leave shit anywhere (other than the shit I leave everywhere Xp)

>After a whole day of cleaning the bar, just the bartender and purple-anon cleaning, sweeping, and picking up after the "weekend", both parties sit down, enjoying some - for once - earned beer
>The bartender lights a cigarette, as anon types away at his laptop, going through the process of archiving and then wiping his socials
>This is gonna take days, but that's okay
>The bartender looks up
<Oh, yeh, ye fergot me fookin nametag ye limey coont! How am Ah te stab people in the throat when I hug them without it!
>she chortles as he gives her the e_e face
<Ah shoot th' fook up, ye were right
>he smiles agreeingly
<But wha' 'ave ye lairned?
>He sighs
"Always at the hotel. AirBnB is a dice game.
<Aaaaaaaand?
"No alcohol until after the car is packed, no exceptions."
<Aye, boot yer fergettin' somethin'
"And that is? No, I got this. When I fuck up, even with the best of intentions, it brings everyone and everything down. Yes, it was manageable this time, but it could have turned out WAY worse. This cannot be allowed to happen again, and it Will not be. I will take all the necessary time and precaution, treating each con like "Now that that's out of the way, lets spend the next X months planning for the next con with the assistance of an AI because my autistic ass forgets fucking everything. I think that about sums it up."
<Gud
>she tamps out her cigarette
<Ah think ye earned a bowl
>As she packs it, she snickers to herself; he gives her the E_e face
<Ah got te say the line
"Don't"
<Ahm nut a monstar, ahm a MINOTAUR!
"This bitch,...."

Oh! Right! E621
E621 PRIMARILY (aside from the smut site) refers to the following "Requirement" for conventions.
E(veryday) 6(hours of sleep) 2(squareish meals, and) 1(shower, please and for fucks sake).
Through (mostly?) no fault of my own - I'll happily speak to the insomnia and other things - my ratio this weekend went more in the neighborhood of (on average) e1.5.5.5
This isn't bragging (it is a flex tho), this is a statement of determination. I am capable of awesome shit! Dammit!

<Ye knaur them nigger-coonts were jealous cuz ye've got a better knife set than they do
"Thanks, I needed to hear that"

Yes yes, "Im not a monster, I'm a minotaur" is the prevailing theme for this thread and everything going forward. Looking for half-assed RP? This is the thread. Bored and looking for engagement? This is the thread. Trying to pass from the Abyss to the Hells, and think you can barter/negotiate/lie your way through and not get caught? This is the thread. ^_~

Looking at you like you should have seen this coming, the bartender fiddles with her phone.
https://youtu.be/RP0h0WmrhKE?si=Ka_qOd9m-eMofkmX

<Ah fook off, ye shouldnt be surprised te find he's a faggit
Don't YOU start! We earned this! You of ALL "people" know what went into that!
I assume none of you know, but Blood and Thunder is like Fairy Tale; the most newbie friendly, but also about to murder a face or two. And Cowie the druid works day and night to be able to throw out the necessary drops. I have a reputation, well earned.

NO!! I'M ANGRY BECAUSE I DONT FEEL I DESERVE IT! REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
You bastards ;_;

[Verse]
Cowie the Druid swims all night
<aye, every fookin day
In the Bay of Storms under pale moonlight
Thorium veins with a rich delight
Mining gems till the dawn breaks bright
<Fookin swipers

[Verse 2]
Blood and Thunder plays their tune
<THAT we do!
Guildmates laugh beneath the moon
<Frequently
Arcane crystals and sapphires blue
Hidden treasures for the chosen few
<okay, I had a think, and I honestly don't know how many people I've saved. Like, that's my thing; here, take this, don't die.

[Chorus]
In the water's deep embrace
Cowie finds her special place
Gems and ore in a fluid race
A druid's calm in nature's grace
<It keeps people in the fight, thats what its about

[Verse 3]
Storms that roar with mighty clash
Waves and winds in a wild bash
Mined with purpose gems that flash
Thorium veins with a golden splash

[Bridge]
Underneath the world's harsh glare
Cowie delves with utmost care
Riches found but none to spare
<So true, I'm always the one dying
For the druid who braves the stormy air

[Verse 4]
Night is long but she's not weary
Sea's as wild as a fabled fairy
Mining deep where it's quite scary
Filling bags in a quest so merry

>riches found but none to spare, for the druid who braves the stormy air
Ngl, that one gets me in the feels

Okay, I don't know how this nigger is doing it, but he made a second album.
https://suno.com/playlist/1f671d50-0b51-4f5d-b462-b1b11500eaee
In this album we ask the ever-important question: Who's running floor spec?

<CAN I FOOKIN DO IT
yes e_e
<I'm gonna drag it fookin out
Yes e_e
<Ah git te tell ye I told ye so
Yes e_e
Alright, Ah (runs off)
Oh, you're gonna complain to me about absurd? Please

This nigger won't stop ;_;
https://suno.com/playlist/0c5a182f-fc05-454d-89d9-4b43a64f9fd2

*deep cigarette sounds*

But not tonight
https://suno.com/song/9bfb4c0a-273e-4953-93b8-92bc66d01542

Usuallly healing, but tonight shes tanking

<My my, have ye seen the weather report?
Yep. 100% chance of thunder

<Remember that dude we knew back in the day? MotherChode? He was quite the character
Salud, where and if ever you are chode

>The bartender expressionlessly wipes a glass, as that purple-faced shit bangs his way in the front door
"I promise, I'm not here to say Mares again, I came to grab my keys. I AM going to SAY Mares Mares Mares Mares, but I came for these. Also Mares,"
>he says, scooping the keys off the table with a jingle
>turning to the bartender he nods singularly and says
"Mares,"
>before sprightly exiting the building
>the bartender sighs and lights her last cigarette
<He's been like this since the cup, both cuz the 3rd star and cuz marefair

"I love pegasus vagina" The man with the fully erect penis and no pants said in a casual tone, while stroking his massive cock.

Neglectfully unsaged
Also while this is happening
https://suno.com/song/9bfb4c0a-273e-4953-93b8-92bc66d01542
<Shut the FOOK up and do what ah tell ye

>the bartender glances to the purple-faced nigger, who's halfway into a deli sandwich, in spite of the hour
<Ye knaurr Winter Wrap Up just got an unescapable head-canon upgrade. Like, we gotta watch outselves when this song plays
Yep, all in

>>188281
"Sure, an orange juice please" he replied,
"and a napkin for my semen"

<An where de ya think YER goin?
I was gonna try and sleep some, actually
<Naur. Haven't ye seen the weather report?
No,....
<Well then grab yer trusty energy drink, cuz tonight its 100% chance of Thunder, mate
Sighs. Okay

>>188468
https://youtu.be/wuPw4BcGPak?si=SHznkikR-PhNhPMy
https://youtu.be/junUjHUmGF8?si=YxmpPQOLhmxWJGWW
for all you english-only faggots who somehow travel to europe every other week

Unabashedly posted! Even without sage! You know who you are!

>>188524
Based.
Thanks poner.
>>188567
Cool song.

>>188568
<Please, dunnae ye thank me mate, Ah'm just further down the line than ye.
If'n ye wanna thank somepony, look up

>>188569
Sorry of that was too ambiguous. What was implied is that the file was first made available by a timely post/contribution from someone on staff who may wish to not be credited for it? Idk. In any case, its his fault thatfor probably the next 3 weeks theres gonna be the very amplified sounds of the Movie coming from my cottage.

Ah, weller fook me rightly, Ah finded another musical!
https://youtu.be/dOAqZJgCTVM?si=2EVaD1UBBP8EvcB5

>>188639
Saged, but of course "Come inside" worked Xp

>>188639
Also saged, but this is how you deal with "Gods". They are generally unfamiliar with 'experience', and might need bowling-bumpers at first

https://youtu.be/nMmrtgbFmOg?si=hBgGz8RD5UE-3fjX
Istg, this series