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The Ruins of Rhest.jpg
Red Hand Of Doom - Part II: The Electric Boogaloo
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.139426
Welcome, lurkers, to our fabulous thread.
In this thread, we continue our journey in which our party (yet unnamed), embarks on an epic quest to thwart the assault of the Red Hand army on Elsir Vale, racing to prepare for the assault before the might horde ends the world as they know it.

The game is a long-term d&d campaign that run on the 3.5e system. It is mostly played on this board, with partial support on discord.
General details of the campaign can be found here: >>132102 →

Now, the party left off at the end of the evacuation of Drellin's Ferry, the townsfolk fleeing ahead of the advance of the horde. The Red Hand forces are mighty, and the party has been able to accomplish little to hinder the army, although the vengeful fury of a certain giant and his granddaughters may have bought the villagers some time, as distant sounds of thunder echo from the hills.

In part one, the party learned some vital information, from the the Wyrmlord Koth's notes, map, and conversations with many characters along the way
>The Red Hand horde means business. If it is going to be stopped, that will have to be at Brindol, the only place in Elsir Vale with a standing army large enough and the fortifications necessary to have a chance against such a large force.
>Monsters are blocking the roads to the north, blocking any chance of reinforcements for Brindol
>One of the leaders of the Red Hand is in the ruined city of Rhest.
>The horde is going to steamroll the towns east of Drellin’s Ferry and keep going.
>A powerful wizard named Cromar is retired in the Blackfens
A partial archive of Part I can be found here: >>133942 →

And with that, let the games begin.
332 replies and 44 files omitted.
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140890
>>140888
Trips checked, and I'll throw in some extra info if either of you make these checks.
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
cb96aa9
?
No.140891
140893
>>140889
[1d20+8 = 14] Sense Motive
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140892
>>140889
[1d20+3 = 8]
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140893
140894 140896
>>140891
You notice the hobgoblin's right eye visibly widen and twitch at the phrase:
>Are you trying to summon Tiamat
before returning to the same angry glare.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140894
140895 140903
>>140893
The plot chickens

>>140889
"Thanks for nothing, there. Next question, what kind of numbers are we up against? I don't care if you give me some rough estimate with one real number and a bunch of zeros or an exat headcount of all of you, but some noghing answer like 'a lot' or 'enough to drown you fuckers in' will just result in me asking until I get that real answer.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140895
>>140894
*exact and *nothing
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
cb96aa9
?
No.140896
140897 140903
>>140893
Int check in place of untrained Knowledge (Religion) (or planes, or whatever applies)
How the fuck does summoning a god even work? Would it be an avatar or something? Can Aral even guess at it?
[1d20+5 = 19]
Also to determine whether he even understands how bad this even is, if nothing else.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140897
140898
>>140896
how do I assist with this roll?
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
cb96aa9
?
No.140898
140899
>>140897
I don't know if you put points into knowledge religion (but I mean, you are a cleric, so you have it as a class skill)
But if nothing else, the aid another is like:
Roll the same skill, if it's higher than 10, then you get to add a +2 to the other player's roll. You might be better off to just roll your own tho.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140899
140900 140903
>>140898
fair enough, I'll just assume you told me what you're thinking about and make my own roll
[1d20+9 = 18]
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140900
140901
>>140899
well then
I guess we know about as much as each other
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
cb96aa9
?
No.140901
140902
>>140900
If you have it trained, you still probably know more. Untrained checks allow for common and basic knowledge only iirc.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140902
>>140901
does trained knowledge affect something separately from having it as a skill?
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140903
140904
>>140894
The goblin, possessing high Wisdom but rather low Int, is glad to continue berating your with unintelligoble slurs and let info about the Red Hand slip as he continues to threaten you with Doom
He gobbles in laughter
"Gobgobgobgobgobgob! You have no hope! There are too many of us! Thousands of us march from the human river town as we speak! The giant-ones have joined us, and dragons soar overhead. Saarvith readies to end the swamp elves, and soon even the Lion King will follow us! Gobgobgobgobgob!" the goblin divulges, stupidly
>>140896
>>140899
Summoning a monster is one thing, summoning a god is another. Sustaining a god on the prime material plane permanently is unheard of, but would be apocalyptic if it occurred.
In any case, it would involve the powers of a mighty spellcaster, and a sacrifice of great value. It would be a truly apocalyptic event, were it to unfold.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140904
140905
>>140903
Can I roll something to see if I can figure out who the Lion King and Saarvith are?
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140905
140906
>>140904
Saarvith is unfamiliar.
Aral immediately recognizes the "swamp elves" as the Tiri Kitor Wild Elves in the Blackfens.

Roll knowledge (religion) to see what you might know of this supposed "lion king".
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140906
140907
>>140905
[1d20+9 = 22]
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140907
140908
5f0.gif
The hobgoblin cultist suddenly looks nervous, as if he's said too much.
"B-but, he isn't doing anything important there. Who is Saarvith anyway?"
>>140906
Elsir Vale is home to a powerful lich, commonly known as The Ghostlord, who resides in an ancient temple devoted to lions. The Ghostlord is only spoken of in legend, but his power is said to be unmatched.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140908
140909
>>140907
"Nice try, faggot. Anything else you'd like to share with us, since I'm sure you now realize that you can't dig yourself any deeper, or would you rather take it up with your countrymen the next time we see them?"
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140909
140910
>>140908
"N-never! You won't get anything from me! The Lady awaits me!" The cultist declares
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140910
140911
>>140909
"She may await you, but first you gotta check back in with her gatekeepers. So, would you rather be executed for treason because you were a dumbass, or because you actually committed treason?"
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140911
140912
>>140910
The goblin scowls, and lands a perfect 20 to spit right through the visor on your helmet, cursing unintelligibly in at least three languages.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140912
140913 140914
>>140911
I remove my helmet, wipe the pit from my eye, wipe it back on one of the restrained bits of the hobgoblin, and whistle for my horse
"Daisy, c'mere."
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140913
>>140912
*spit
I am just full of typos today
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140914
>>140912
Once my horse is there, I get back on her and have her stamp the gobbo's legs into paste
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.140915
140919
Huzzah!
[1d20+11 = 15]
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140916
140917 140918
Anybody want a piece of the hobgoblin before I say the interrogation's over?
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.140917
140919 140921
>>140916
I'm gonna piss on him.
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
cb96aa9
?
No.140918
140921
>>140916
All yours.
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140919
140920 140922
>>140915
Sorry, not high enough to get plot relevant info. The DM says with a sigh of relief.
However, you do know that "The Lion King" is another name given to a horrible monster that haunts the Thornwastes. It is a region that no other druids in the vale dare approach.
>>140917
Roll a Dexterity (pissing) check, add your base attack bonus.
Horse form gives a +4 racial bonus.
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
cb96aa9
?
No.140920
140921 140924
>>140919
>Sorry, not high enough to get plot relevant info.
Hold my Knowledge (Nature).
[1d20+12 = 29]
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140921
140925
>>140917
>>140918
Fair enough.
I tell the gobbo "Then I guess you're dying a dumbass." and put him back wherever he was while we were transporting him while we were between towns. As for what to do next, why don't we take all this info over to Pelor's bros and see if they can help us out with any of it, assuming >>140920 somehow turns up nothing
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.140922
140923 140924
>>140919
[1d20+3 = 21]
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.140923
>>140922
Me and Misty piss on him.
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140924
1383170440820.jpg
>>140920
[Sighs]
I really shouldn't be telling you this before part 2 even begins, but I already spoiled in in that ghost-nonsense encounter, so...

The Druids of the Tiri Kitor are old enough to have told you about something called a "Blighter" a wicked ex-druid who has turned against the natural order. The Ghostlord, or "Lion King", is one such Druid, a mage of unmatched power who haunts the Thornwastes.
>>140922 (dubs)
The Cleric is completely covers in piss.
He REEEEEEEEEs a mighty REEEEEEEEEEEEEE as Jorr's dogs join the party.
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140925
>>140921
Jorr helps you tie up the piss-soaked cultist, who writhes in fury as he is gagged.
The hobgoblin's attitude has once again become hostile.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140926
140927
So, now what?
Kavern Master
03b4536
?
No.140927
140928 140929
What we learned today:
>The Red Hand are fanatical followers of the devil Tiamat
>The horde has already begun marching from Drellin's Ferry
>The unknown lord of the horde has ambitions that surpass the conquest of Brindol
>Red Hand veterans and cultists fear not death, for they mean that deserting means sacrifice on the altar of Tiamat
>Int is a dump stat for Clerics
>Elves in trouble
>McGuffin in the Blackfens(?!)
>The "Lion King", a monster of unmatched power, may join the fray
>>140926
Now I read this book and do some work for class registration.
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140928
>>140927
A solid decision. Happy reading and GL on that registration work!
Artorias the Grouchy Cleric
c712a26
?
No.140929
>>140927
>int is a dump stat for clerics
can confirm...
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141247
Okay, I'm going to try to actually be prepared for the session this week.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141435
141436
Spoilered
Okay, as I mentioned earlier in the server, I've taken the liberty to do a bit of retconning to the session two weeks ago. It was my mistake to replace a lvl 4 low-op Fighter with a lvl 4 high-op Warblade with a x4 crit modifier.
>muf favored weapon of Tiamat
Because of that I derailed the game and created the "revive Henry" sidequest that forces the party to go to Brindol.

So, with that being said.
>A magical golden elephant (see: Hollyphant) flies by and revives Henry immediately after he dies
>Henry remains lvl 6 because reasons
>Dumbo is immediately torn apart by randomly-spawning demons
>the demons are promptly smited by a randomly-teleporting Paladin on a Door Crusade casting Door To Great Evil:
>http://dnd.arkalseif.info/spells/ghostwalk--94/door-to-great-evil--1384/index.html#:~:text=Door%20to%20great%20evil%20guarantees,with%20a%20way%20to%20return
>Sir Not-Appearing-In-This-Film promptly teleports away on his prismatic dyke horse, to do important paladin stuff elsewhere
>An Ethereal Filcher pops in from the Astral Plane and steals the +1 Dragonfang Heavy pick and the priceless blue diamond from Jorr's Bag
>"REEEEEEEE! Dagnabbit! Bloody, plowin' Filchers!"
>A random Hobgoblin Bladebearer charges out of the woods and attacks the party
>She is immediately shot to death by Jorr, who got a sneak attack, and finished off by his dogs
>She Drops two identical +1 Dragoncraft clawed gauntlets (spiked gauntlets, but slashing), and two more potions of Enlarge Person (the party has 3 now).
>An Invisible, flying Wizard helpfully tells Aral that the Ice arrows he found were actually made of Stygian Ice
>John J. Abrams, said Wizard, accidentally steps on a planar manifest zone, and enjoys an all expense paid vacation to the 5th layer of Baator, only to return when his player is able to commit to playing consistently

I know it's gay, but this will make it more enjoyable for everyone.

And so, the party leaves off on day 12, having just finished interrogating the Piss Goblin. It is no longer necessary to go to Brindol to revive Henry, but you may if you wish to.
You could also see what Norro Wiston said about Cromar being in danger in the Blackfens.
Or check out the blockades on the Rhest Trail that the lion lady mentioned, in that area.
Or see what this "Saarvith" guy is planning in the Blackfens to unleash on the elves there.

I turned time back to day 12 because stuff happens in-game regardless of whether or not the PCs move to the next milestone. Also because I don't think anybody absorbed that you could get to both the blackfens and the Rhest Trail via the Elsir River.

After you get to the next milestone (It's in the Blackfens), I will raise the entire party to lvl 7, and switch the game back to XP based leveling.

Also, everyone in the party receives 8 action Points for the remainder this level, since I'm too retarded to know when to fudge a diceroll in the party's favor:
https://www.d20srd.org/srd/variant/adventuring/actionPoints.htm
Depending on how you use these, I may make it a permanent part of the game.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141436
141437 141439
>>141435
No matter what we do, I nominate that our official secondary objective goes from whatever it was before to "find a silver dragon and convince it to help us"
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141437
>>141436
Seconding this.
it's more like "bribe a slutty dragoness to be our cum dumpster."
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141438
141440
As for what I vote we do right now, we take a quick look at brindol to make sure things aren't on fire yet and then go get that free milestone and level saarvith guy so we can stop him
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141439
141442
>>141436
Noted. I'll see if that fits on my map.
Silver Dragon Wyrmlings are ECL 11 though...
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141440
141441
>>141438
You are near Talar, and you haven't heard any news from Brindol except that refugees are still evacuating in that direction, so you can rest assured that shit has not hit the fan (yet).

>tfw my trove PDFs aren't working anymore ;_;
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141441
141442 141443
>>141440
So then I guess we go in whatever direction the blackfens are in, if nobody objects
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141442
>>141439
I'm down for waiting till we're qualified to fuck young dragonesses.
>>141441
Yep.
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
3f4a98c
?
No.141443
141444
>>141441
Alright. The only meta reason to go to the city would've been shops and stuff, but going towards the story is kind of important too. Blackfens it is.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141444
>>141443
Ah, heheh.. Good choice. No railroading here...

So, you can either go by boat, or head up the Rhest Trail North of Talar. At this point, I'm situating you guys around Talar, so it'd be quicker on horseback.

You can do any essential shopping in Talar before you move to the Rhest trail. All mundane provisions are available, and low-cost magic items can be found as the merchants dump their stocks for shekels.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141445
214891323_2299d8591c_o.jpg
Also, since I guess trying to hold back map info to avoid metagaming is a lost cause, I managed to find a map of Elsir Vale with all secret doors removed:
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141446
141447 141448
Okay, assuming you guys left on day 10, canonizing the two encounters I ran, it should have taken you 5-6 days to reach the Blackfens, *assuming* nothing else happened along the way.

This info is revealed with Aral's Geography check, inferring from his own memory of the Blackfens, and the Red Hand map.

You rested in Talar on day 13, and went north to Witchcross after suddenly deciding there was nothing worth doing in Brindol for now.

Did you guys want to bring the piss goblin with you?
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141447
141449
>>141446
yeah, I'm bringing him with us. He may yet prove useful in other ways, anyway. Also, I'd like to note that in case any more gobbos show up, I have my helmet put away so that they don't immediately try to focus me down for being the ultimate heretic or something.
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141448
141449
>>141446
>Did you guys want to bring the piss goblin with you?
Would it hurt to bring him?
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141449
141450 141451
>>141448
Jorr has him tied up and gagged, and he can't cast anything without his unholy symbol. You could feasibly drag him there, but you don't really sense anything else useful from him.
Only drawback on my part is occasionally having to roleplay him.
>>141447
Got it.

Now, does anybody have something they want to buy or sell in Talar?
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141450
141452
>>141449
>Now, does anybody have something they want to buy or sell in Talar?
What's on the counter of options?
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141451
141457 141460
>>141449
I have all of jack and shit to sell, so I guess I'd like to hear the list of buying options too
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141452
141453 141454 141456
>>141450
As i said in the server, mundane provisions are available, including special materials, and low-cost magic items are available (feather tokens, potions, weapon augmentation crystals, scrolls, etc). As the merchants dump their stocks for shekels in wake of the coming horde.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141453
>>141452
any specific kinds of feather tokens present/ removed from that list?
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141454
141457
>>141452
What kind of potions other than the ordinary?
Anonymous
3f4a98c
?
No.141456
141457
>>141452
>weapon augmentation crystals
Wasn't aware those were an option. How do those work and which ones are available?
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141457
141458 141462
>>141451
>>141454
Potions of lesser vigor are available. You can barter one cure potion and one flask of alchemical healing paste for a Lesser Vigor potion.

A rare oil of Personal Weapon Augmentation is for sale. You can have it for you can have it for 300 gp.

All feather tokens are available: Price 50 gp (anchor), 300 gp (bird), 200 gp (fan), 450 gp (swan boat), 400 gp (tree), 500 gp (whip).

One merchant is selling a Gray Bag Of Tricks for 800 gp. Less than usual.
And it seems as though a set of Druid's Vestments are going for 3,750 gp. Just over a third of its usual price.

Magic Arrows are sold individually for the price of 50 of said arrows divided by 50.

Really, if you guys want a low-cost magic item, I'll let you buy it. Nothing over 4000 gp is here though.

>>141456
>>141455
You'll have to check the Magic Item Compendium. My trove link is broken.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141458
141460
>>141457
question, if we sell off all the garbo we've collected so far and sold it all, how much dosh would we each get from it? Because if I can get around 200 gp, then I'll buy a lesser crystal of life drinking, and if not, then I'll just get a least one
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141460
141463
>>141451
I would like to inform you that the piss goblin was wearing a decent suit of +1 banded mail, before Jorr looted him.
If you want to sell your old armor, that's can be done.
>>141458
It depends on what you sell and were you sell it, but magic item often sell for half their market price.
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141462
>>141457
I'm not going to buy anything.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141463
141464
>>141460
I guess I'm taking the hobgobbo's armor and ditching my old suit. Also, is there anything that would indicate to me where would be the best place to sell off our collective loot so as to get the biggest pile to distribute?
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141464
141465 141466
>>141463
If you make a really good diplomacy check, I'll let you sell all of your stuff for %55 of its market price.

Reminder that gems, treasure and art items sell for their full price. They're basically currency.

Also, I would like everyone to sort out what they took from the last few encounters. Unclaimed loot will be taken by Jorr and sold for expensive dog food.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141465
141466 141469
>>141464
Anybody care if I take everything we don't care about, sell it off, and bring back the money?
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141466
141467
>>141464
I'm gonna keep the idol of Ehlonna but sell pretty much whatever else.
>>141465
Go ahead.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141467
141468
>>141466
That's one yes, any input from Aral?
Anonymous
3f4a98c
?
No.141468
141471
>>141467
Sure. Check the inventory channel, there was even unclaimed currency in there. I support you being in charge of collecting and splitting up that shit.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141469
>>141465
Please discuss it with the party. I think there's quite a bit of unclaimed loot in the inventory channel.

In game, you would be aware that the Red Hand Horde is going to trample town after town in the coming days. Chances to buy and sell items will be increasingly scarce, and resource management will make the difference between winning and losing.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141471
141473
>>141468
Alright, taking all of our unclaimed garbage and selling it! [1d20+11 = 14]

Selling:
-1 lapis
-1 onyx
-Iron samurai mask
-Electrum cloth vest
-Silk hunter's cap with sable trim
-both +1 dragoncraft clawed gauntlets
-my old scale mail
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141473
141479
>>141471
I would like to give Henry's player a chance to claim some of those before final decisions are made.

Fyi, if you don't intend to buy something with the funds, the gems and art items are worth carrying around because they're effectively lighter weight currency. You should be factoring the weight of gold and silver into your carrying capacity.
>50 pieces = 1 pound of metal
Art items also count as masterwork tools for whatever skill you can justify them relating to.

The scale mail sells for 25 gp. Add that money to your sheet.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141479
141480
>>141473
fair enough, I'll add the +25 gp to my stash, hold off on selling anything until we can sort out the inventory management, and probably have to wait until next week to actually see if I can purchase what I want to or not
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141480
141481
>>141479
What do you want?
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141481
141488
>>141480
I'd like the lesser crystal of life drinking, but I'm 110 gp short and I'm pretty sure my charisma won't be getting me any discounts if my previous roll is of any indication.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141488
141490 141493 141497
>>141481
A lesser Crystal Of life drinking only heals 30 hp a day. You might be better off buying potions of lesser vigor, a healing belt, or just casting spells.
A lesser augmentation crystal can only be equipped to a weapon of +1 quality. You would need acquire a +1 Mace or other weapon to attach it to, unless you intend to attatch it to your horned helmet.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141490
141492
>>141488
so I'd just be better off getting the least one anyway?
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141492
141494
>>141490
You'd be better off not getting one at all, but sure you can buy a least one.

The piss goblin dropped a masterwork mace, btw.
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141493
aryanne check em.png
>>141488
Checked.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141494
141498 141500
>>141492
Then I guess I'll just buy a belt of healing, claim that masterwork mace in >>141492 and then promptly sell it off too since it's functionally identical to my current mace from what I can tell.
Anonymous
3f4a98c
?
No.141497
141500
>>141488
based digits
>A lesser augmentation crystal can only be equipped to a weapon of +1 quality
So, assuming it would work with my +1 composite longbow (or +1 blade), how much would a Lesser Crystal of Energy Assault cost with the merchants fleeing and all that?
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141498
>>141494
I just realized I responded to a post and then quoted it later in the same post... Somebody kill me IRL
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141500
141502 141503 141504
>>141494
The healing belt is a good items. Between two of those and your spontaneous channeling, the party should have more than enough healing.
The healing belt is a common enough item to be found. You can buy it for 750 gp, which is also the cost of a wand of lesser vigor or cure light wounds.
>>141497
A lesser augmentation crystal of energy assault is going to cost you 3000 gp. You conveniently find a merchant who has one.
Anonymous
3f4a98c
?
No.141502
141506
>>141500
Shit. Only have 2365.
How much would throwing in my armor net me? It's a Mithral Chain Shirt.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141503
>>141500
I'll just buy the healing belt, that seems good for me.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141504
141506
>>141500
also, how much does selling the masterwork mace get me?
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141506
141507 141508
>>141502
You had a spare mithral chain shirt in the vault loot, iirc.
Your Star Ruby is worth 1200 gp, btw.

I'm going to go eat lunch now.
>>141504
You can sell the mace for 154 gp.
Artorias
c712a26
?
No.141507
141508
>>141506
Then I sell the mace too.
Anonymous
3f4a98c
?
No.141508
141512
>>141506
>Star Ruby
Right. I was under the impression someone else took it, to be honest. But double checking it, it seems nobody did. (Someone absolutely should have.)
So, if this is right, then I use my gold and the ruby to buy a lesser augmentation crystal of energy assault (electricity), sell the spare chain shirt, leaving me with 565 gp + whatever the mithral chain shirt sells for.
This remaining gold is now available for anyone to augment their shopping needs, as according to my own logic encountering that specific loot pile, the ruby is technically common party loot. So feel free to claim it for a purchase now if you're just short of moneys to get something. >>141507 >>141493
(Otherwise I'll split it up once we're done with shopping and inventory stuff.)
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141512
141515
>>141508
I thought you got the star Ruby and Hamfist got the Star Sapphire.
Anonymous
3f4a98c
?
No.141515
141516
>>141512
I took the blue star sapphire from that encounter. In the server I said I would like to sell that and one of the +1 elven blades. You answered I get a 1000 gp for those. If we are indeed talking about the chimera loot, and the 1000 gp is accurate for selling those 2, then just ignore my previous post, as I has no access to the ruby.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141516
In case you guys didn't see the message on the server, everybody gains an extra 1500 gp to spend on whateverthefuck.
>>141515
You can get 700 gp for the chain shirt.

I was indeed referring to the chimera loot.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141524
Okay, after the party did their business in Talar, they would go north past Witchcross towards where they were told the Blockade should be.

As the evening of day 15 closes in, I'm giving Aral's player a chance to scout ahead.
>Up ahead, a crude, 10 ft high palisade of logs has been been erected across the road, extending forty feet to either side and completely blocking all passage. A squat, 20 ft watchtower looms in the middle of the palisade. You catch a glimpse of movement up in the tower, and spy a hobgoblin archer leaning against a post with his chin on his chest.
So yes. There is indeed a blockade on Rhest Trail, just before the Blackfens.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141529
>dicerolls
Aral hears the sounds of hobgoblins boasting about battle, and boredom of being left out of the killing down south.
He also hears the sounds of what you can only assume to be a couple large (not huge) giants snoring.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141911
Okay, it looks like our Warblade has been swapped out for a Crusader. I wish his player had told me that before I retconned him back to life, but that's just what happened.

Everyone spent the past week doing inventory.

Chad spent day 13 building a shrine of Ehlonna in the Witchwood, by casting grow plants and wood shape. He placed his unicorn totem there in doing so, the value of which will be considered tithes paid to the Assembly Of Balance.

The party rests at Witchcross on day 15. That evening, Aral and Jorr scout ahead to investigate the blockade. They were able to detect at least 8 humanoids and two giants.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141912
141913 141914 141915
636252772538300448.jpeg
And so, without further ado.
random phase spider appears and drags Henry Hamfist into the void
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141913
>>141912
He's going to Brazil
Anonymous
910197f
?
No.141914
>>141912
Those crafty phase spooders
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141915
>>141912
It wants to suck him off
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141916
My character is a goliath amazonian covered in an unruly mass of heavy and crude crystal plating, who is wielding what appears to be a giant hammer made of jagged and poorly shaped crystal.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141917
141918
A hulking amazonian goliath stumbles out of the woods while extremely drunk and looks around. "Why the fuck is the road blocked?"
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141918
141919
>>141917
"Goblins." a shit-faced drunken woodsman says, drunkenly
"Blockin' the roads. Ready fo' war..." he mumbles
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141919
>>141918
The amazon ponders a solution for a moment. "I'm gonna fucking smash it to smithereens."
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141920
RedHandOfDoom_RoadBlockade_Player.jpg
Aral was able to make out the basic structure of the blockade as something like this:
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141921
RedHandOfDoom_Blackfens_Player.jpg
Player Map of the Blackfens
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141922
>>139447
Updated list.
3rd level spells:
Sleet storm
Call lightning
2nd level:
Bull's strength
Chill metal
Flaming sphere
1st level:
Calm animals
Faerie fire
Entangle
Produce flame
Cure light wounds
Level 0:
Guidance
Detect magic
Flare
Purify food and drink
Mending
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141923
141924
"My horse is amazing."
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141924
141925
asperii.gif
>>141923
[happy horse noises]
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141925
>>141924
"I like mares."
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141926
DAY 16; Morning

We'll begin the encounter as soon as I figure out who is approaching from what angle, and in what order.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141927
Geee, planning takes forever.
Combat starting now though.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141928
Okay, combat is over.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.141929
141934
to the amazonian goliath: "Thanks for helping us out and all, but who the fuck are you?"
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141930
In the chest you guys find.
>White tiger pelt
>Orange tiger pelt
>500 gp
>a pair of silk slippers
>strange ointment
A naked elf and a naked dwarf both fall out of the sack the other ogre was carrying. Both women. They're both unconscious. The elf is gagged with an apple; the dwarf with an onion.
Apparently the ogres were saving these two to eat later.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141931
The goliath has already called dibs on the slippers and the ointment as well as the elf. She'll claim the dwarf as well if nobody wants it.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141932
141933 141935
Vomeo(the female goliath) rubs some of the strange ointment onto her pointer finger and jams it into the elf's cunt before slapping the smaller woman across the face. The goliath then waits to see what the ointment does.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.141933
>>141932
"Who the fuck are you?"
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141934
141936 141946
>>141929
"My name is Vomeo Woundchaser Kolakalathi. I was trying to find my way back to town after getting into a drinking contest with some other goliaths in the woods."
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141935
141937
>>141932
Anon, are you sure you want to do that?
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.141936
141940
>>141934
"Fair enough. Thanks for the help there, the pervert and his horse probably wouldn't have made it otherwise."
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141937
141938 141939 141941
>>141935
You're right. Vomeo will put her ointment covered finger into the dwarf's cunt before slapping her awake instead of doing it to the elf. That way I still have the elf if something happens to the dwarf.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141938
>>141937
My character has gauntlets on so it won't get onto her hands
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.141939
>>141937
And I stand by on medical duty in case shit goes south
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141940
>>141936
"Don't mention it. Looks like it paid off anyways."
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141941
141942
>>141937
... Okay.
The both remain unconscious. Vomeo has used two out of five of the applications in the bottle.

And her alignment changes from CG to CN.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141942
141943
>>141941
Works for me. I'll try to shake the dwarf awake.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141943
141944
Anybody else want to identify these items before they're used up?
>>141942
The dwarf remains unconscious.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.141944
141945
>>141943
split the dosh? 4 people is 125 each
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141945
>>141944
That's doable.
Meta: Vomeo just used up quite a bit of money worth of ointment.
It's clearly magical.
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141946
141948
>>141934
"Hello."
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141947
141948
Oh, now that I look at it, the women should slowly awaken after the ointment is applied.

They both get up.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141948
141949 141951
>>141946
"So who are you?"
>>141947
Are they both still tied up?
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141949
141950
>>141948
Yes.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141950
>>141949
Nice
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141951
>>141948
"I am Chad of the mountain mist, my greatest ally is this horse, my plum pudding."
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141952
Vomeo uses three of her healing belts to heal Aral, Chad, and Misty for 6d8 HP each.

Aral gets back 29 HP, Misty gets back 17, and Chad gets back 19.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141953
141954 141955
Vomeo leans down and tilts the elf and dwarves chins up so they're meeting her eyes. "How did you end up captured by goblins?"
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141954
>>141953
*dwarf's
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141955
141956 141957
>>141953
Pardon I was eating.
The elf and dwarf, after some time recovering, explain that they'd been captured by hobgoblins in one of the various raids that have been scouring the countryside lately.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141956
141957
>>141955
“Well it sucks to be you.” Vomeo says while using 10ft of her rope to make collars and hand ties for the two women.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.141957
141958
>>141956
"Now hold on, I have an idea."
>>141955
I ask the two of them "What kind of skills do you have?"
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141958
141959
>>141957
"I bake cookies." says the elf
"I butchered hogs in Nimon Gap." says the dwarf
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.141959
141960
>>141958
so that's a fat no... Alright, whichever one Vomeo likes less is being set free and told to get the fuck out of dodge.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141960
141961
>>141959
I’ll keep the elf and let the dwarf go.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141961
141962 141963
>>141960
Since I’m letting the dwarf go, I’ll use the 10ft of rope to make one collar, one leash, and a hand tie to keep the elf’s hands bound. Doing this instead of making two collars and two hand ties.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141962
141965
>>141961
Dude, are you really going to drag an elf through knee-deep, monster-infested mud?
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
ea105f9
?
No.141963
141965
>>141961
Wait, I thought you said in the server that you'd let the elf go and keep the dwarf instead?
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141964
141968
Okay. Aral, you know that Starsong hill, the home of the elves, is further east. Rhest is more readily accessible, being the remains of an ancient kingdom.
>rolled some checks.
Your journey north is uneventful, and you turn onto the trail beside the road into the Blackfens
Almost immediately after you turn onto the Blackfens, the ground gets really, really, really muddy.
Aral feels crestfallen as he gets mud all over his new magic shoes. Nothing a little prestigitation won't fix though.

Aral, I would like yout to roll a survival check to see how well you're able to traverse the swamp.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141965
141966 141968
>>141962
Yes
>>141963
Nah it’s the other way around unless Aral wants me to free the elf instead of the dwarf on account of them both being elves.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141966
141967 141969
>>141965
Where are you keeping the dwarf?
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.141967
>>141966
we're letting the dorf go, right?
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
ea105f9
?
No.141968
141970 141971
>>141964
[1d20+10 = 28] Survival
>>141965
Yeah I just thought you already agreed to that. I would like to request it again then.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141969
>>141966
Letting the dwarf go since I’m taking the elf. The elf has a collar with a leash attached and her hands are bound behind her back. My character doesn’t care if she dies.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141970
141972 141973
>>141968
Alright then the elf gets freed and the dwarf is the one I’m jeeping
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141971
>>141968
With a check like that, you're able to avoid some of the deadly sinkholes and exploding pockets of gas.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141972
141973
>>141970
*keeping
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.141973
141974 141975
>>141970
>>141972
Where are you keeping it?
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.141974
>>141973
What about the sack that ogre was carrying? He could put the midget back in there.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.141975
>>141973
To fuck and so she can do menial labor while we’re camping
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142545
Phase spiders suddenly snatch up the elf and dwarf bitches.
Because I don't feel like roleplaying them anymore.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142546
Es-trDuUcBITX5i.png

Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142547
Okay, so still in the morning of day 16 you guys are trudging through the mud in the Blackfens. Aral's survival check has saved you from multiple sinkholes and explosions, but you're still making very slow progress to the ruins of Rhest.

Jorr grumbles something about the Witchwood being a lot dryer.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142548
142549
FUCKING_DROWNERS.png
Aral, I would like you to roll a survival check that may or may not dictate how many random encounters you guys get in this biome.
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
42b6e5a
?
No.142549
142550
>>142548
[1d20+10 = 28]
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142550
142553
>>142549
[disappointed GM noises]

Alright, Aral was able to steer the party away from an entire mob of aquatic ghouls, three bog hags, and a trail at which the party would have found themselves waist-deep in rot grubs.

Still, that took up several hours of trudging through the mud, hoping from dry point to dry point. You are all very wet and stinky.

Except for Chad, who gets to watch the rest of you guys suffer from the back of his magical flying horse.

DAY 16; AROUND NOON
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.142551
File (hide): 51C143886B923828B479F70BA3560666-2621642.mp4 (2.5 MB, Resolution:960x960 Length:00:00:21, IMG_4054.MP4) [play once] [loop]
IMG_4054.MP4

Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142552
142553
And before the rest of you guys ask if you might have wanted to fight those monsters, note that none of them would have had treasure; and they would have exhausted your resources before you got to the real encounters.

However, there's one thing that Aral didn't see, as a burbling shape rises from the mud before the party.

Everyone meet me in #combat for initiative.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.142553
>>142550
YES
>>142552
FUCK
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142554
Aral knows that this fearsome beast is a chuul. A large, crustacean-like Aberration with strong pincers and paralytic tentacles. Try to avoid letting yourselves or your horses being grappled.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142555
636252767122656355.jpeg
DSvnHfYU8AEHx_3.jpg
Twisted_Caverns.jpg

Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142556
kobold_stonks.png
Okay, Aral cuts open the Chuul and finds...

*rolls table*
>realizes I rolled a CR 11 loot pile
*rolls again*
>it's still freaking 99 percentile roll

e_e

Are all of the fucking random encounters going to have bullshit treasure rolls?

Okay, in this fat fucking bastard's Chuul's gizzard, you find:
>A set of +1 electrum plate armor (1000 gp art value)
>Feathered Gloves (100 gp) (ruined)
>Fine Leather Shoes (300 gp) (digested)
>Gold Figurine (of an Angel) (900 gp)
>Leopard Fur Tabard (1300 gp) (acid burned)
>Pewter Dice (pair) (70 gp)
>Folding Boat
>Wand of invisibility (7 charges) (totally didn't have 43 charges); runes imply function
>Wand of Cure Moderate Wounds (23 charges)
>A Motherfucking Ring Of Protection (+2), runes on its side imply its function.
>Robe Of Useful Items[/-] (digested)
>+1 Mithril Heavy Steel Shield
>+2 [i]Flaming
longbow
I'd would've thrown away that last one if it weren't so goddamn perfect for Aral. This is your weapon for the rest of the entire campaign. Don't break it.
How this chuul (albeit an advanced one) managed to swallow a 15th level item is beyond me.

And a fuckton of humanoid bones, human, lizadfolk, elf and goblinoid alike. Apparently this fat bastard has had a good year. Must have eaten a king or two.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142557
Okay, now that you spoiled fucks are filthy rich. You can decide how much you want to heal up before I ready the next encounter for this day, after your done splitting the loot.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142558
f35852638b0eb8c304cef699b5ab1ef6.gif
>mfw the monster yields 11 times the recommended treasure value because I decided to roll instead of just picking from a list.
Oh well, too late to take it back. Maybe a bit of Monty Halling will get us this game a bit faster.
Anonymous
1708525
?
No.142559
04FD0DE1-9B3F-4640-862D-F447A8A4ACA6.jpeg

Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142560
The Chuul, much like a lobster, begins to rapidly deteriorate into inedible ooze shortly after it dies, much to Jorr's dismay.

With a few words from Jorr (after his own survival check), Aral slowly realizes that it's unlikely that the party is going to get all the way to Rhest at this rate. You guys are going to want to take a slight detour to find some dry land if you want to rest comfortably tonight.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142561
142562
Okay, Aral rolled well enough in the server to find some forested area that seems a bit safer to travel and rest on, at the cost of a slight detour. This is good, because the horses were getting increasingly difficult to coax through the mud, so much that I was going to force rolling some checks.

He also dodges the horde of drowners and hags I wanted to throw at the party. Maybe some other day.

As the evening settles in on the swamp, the party eventually makes camp, assuming you guys want arcane spells and complete healing.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.142562
142564
>>142561
if we're taking a long rest, then I guess I prepare the same spells that I've been preparing
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142563
142567
As you guys are trudging across the Blackfens, looking for high ground, Aral, then Chad/Misty, and then Jorr spot something ahead:
>A low, mossy island of mud and peat protrudes from the marsh waters ahead. Two gnarled trees grow fitfully on the rugged ground, and sprawled across their turgid roots is the ruined and bloody remains of a horse-sized owl. The once-magnificent bird’s body has been partially dissolved in places, and swaths of foul, dark green fluid still sizzle and pop, eating away at exposed flesh and bone.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142564
142565 142566 142568
>>142562
You haven't gotten there yet.

Both Aral and Chad can roll nature checks to identify the corpse of this creature.
Aral and Artorias can also roll Arcana.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.142565
>>142564
I doubt it'll help much given my +0 to int and no arcana knowledge, but I'll give it a shot
[1d20 = 16]
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
5d53801
?
No.142566
142569 142570 142577
>>142564
[1d20+12 = 17] nature
[1d20+6 = 16] arcana
And a spot for good measure, because at this point I expect the damned ground to jump up at us. [1d20+17 = 29]
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.142567
142569
>>142563
"Hope that whatever killed that thing is the crab we pasted back there, but I doubt it."
Anonymous
315ab8b
?
No.142568
142569
>>142564
[1d20+11 = 26] Nature.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142569
142571
>>142568
>>142566
As you get closer, you recognize it as a Giant Owl: a monster native to this region, and commonly a mount for the Tiri Kitor elves.
>>142567
You can also roll a Heal check for an autopsy, if you want to go look at it.
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142570
142578
>>142566
You think you see something 50-ish feet away.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.142571
142572 142575
>>142569
[1d20+3 = 6]
heal to see if the owl died from anything we need to be worried about
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142572
142573
>>142571
That check is so low I'm going to pretend it didn't happen.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.142573
142574 142575 142577
>>142572
ok, let's try for one less embarrassing while the DM is "checking his papers" or something!
[1d20+3 = 5]
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.142574
142578
>>142573
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Chaddy Daddy of the Pussy Kissed Mist
315ab8b
?
No.142575
>>142571
>>142573
>The second one is worse
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142576
142577 142578
Aral, you think you see something reptilian lurking in the brush not far away.
Since I put you (the survivalist) in the forefront, you appear to have seen in before it saw the party.

You have one (1) round to act.

What do you do?
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142577
142579
>>142573
By "pretend it didn't happen", I meant "give Aral a chance to respond to the monster he just saw".
>>142566
You see a vaguely-crocodilian creature lurking in the brush.
See >>142576
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
5d53801
?
No.142578
142580
>>142574
It's alright, you are clearly distracted by the annoying elf motioning into the distance because he noticed something that might've moved >>142570
>>142576
I try to being it to the attention of the party in quiet manner, and prepare to respond if it attacks.
Artorias of the No Shit Taken
c712a26
?
No.142579
>>142577
ah

fuck
Anonymous
03b4536
?
No.142580
>>142578
No action is necessary to communicate with the party.

Everyone, can meet me in #combat for now to roll initiative again.
After Aral rolls his surprise round, since he moved first.
Anonymous
03b4536
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No.142581
142582
Oekaki.png
>Terrain: Draw a small hillock, dominated by two small trees, where the owl’s carcass lies. Most of the rest of the battlefield consists of light undergrowth (peat), heavy undergrowth (stands of reeds), or shallow bog.
Aral Tel'thuen'slaugh Avaemaskan
5d53801
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No.142582
>>142581
That is the most beautiful thing I have seen in years.