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nuts5.jpg
Fuggin Nuts
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61616
61617 61618 61619 61620 61657 61830
That Bitch stares at Trump thoughtfully and appraisingly. At several moments she begins to speak, but then stops. Trump isn't sure if she's having difficulty formulating the words/response, or is unsure how to respond at all. At last, she appears to make some sort of mental connection, and her face brightens. She punches in her ID for a few moments, and turns back to Trump.
"You can have both," she says. "At first I was having trouble recalling this collection of knives, but then I remembered the meme that was shared," she says, holding up her ID to show them.

This thread continues the continuing RP thread that has been continuing - essentially every weekend (and much throughout the week) - and now continues. Playersfaggots are welcome to join, and shitposting/bantz - within reason - is open to faggots and spectators. It's D&D 3.5e+ rules (+ = whatever else we throw in), and since there's so many previous threads with far more effective OP descriptions I'll just get back to it.

Looking at the ID, Trump and Tracy can see a still image of a uniformed individual holding Tracy's Efficient Quiver, with a perplexed look on his face, facing the camera man. Pushing the screen, the image plays and displays the man slowly turning the quiver over and a broom closet full of assorted knives, daggers, kunai, and other assorted blades falls out onto the ground, along with a few pieces of ridiculously elaborate jewelry. As the last of the knives falls out on the floor in a pile about 8' around at the base and 3-1/2' tall, the uniformed man looks back at the camera and says, "What the fuck," before the video stops.
Did I mention that Trump is disguised as an Orangutan (a fashionable one named Clyde), and Tracy as a monster truck?

Meanwhile, Torcuil has been on an enjoyable impromptu date with Death, and has had a delightful time of it all. She's much less intimidating in a hoodie and sweat pants,... and without the skull-face (which is really just a mask that goes with the cloak) she's a pretty down to earth chick,... who goes around and collects the souls of the dead vocationally. They walk together through town after a lovely meal, returning to Trump Tower.

Stix and Snek are likewise returning to the Tower, having located Stix' prized dagger from the previous encounter/scrimmage with Thez.

Elsewhere, an adorable filly adds more sticks to her bundle. A statue of Alex Jones sits in the tower, looking very sad. A Yak is busy putting the Gestapo and the Generals through some martial training drills. Thez however,....
1169 replies and 61 files omitted.
Anonymous
Hgp1O
?
No.61617
image.jpeg
>>61616

Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61618
61634
>>61616
>Meanwhile, Torcuil has been on an enjoyable impromptu date with Death, and has had a delightful time of it all. She's much less intimidating in a hoodie and sweat pants,… and without the skull-face (which is really just a mask that goes with the cloak) she's a pretty down to earth chick,… who goes around and collects the souls of the dead vocationally. They walk together through town after a lovely meal, returning to Trump Tower.

>tfw your RP character has a better love life than you
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61619
61633
>>61616
Checked!

>Stix and Snek are likewise returning to the Tower
“Sorry nothing interesting happened over at the port, Mr. Snek. I enjoyed your company though.”
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61620
61621
>>61616
>>61616
"Excellent, thank you. Now, how may we go about retrieving our well done steak of a friend?"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61621
61622
>>61620
"The blades will be simple to acquire, we have a warehouse they are being stored at for in cases like this one, but the steak will take a bit more time, as his corpse has already made its way well through several layers of refuse processing. Why do you want the corpse again?" she says, beginning to lead them toward the gates.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61622
61623
>>61621
"Mostly for the items he was carrying. A sword, some bracers, a special ring. They have both sentimental and utilitarian value. I would also like portions of the other four corpses, which should be right alongside the same corpse as they were picked up at the same time as him. We have a resurrection machine, and I would like to undo some of the harm the rogue caused. She may not care, but I do"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61623
61624
>>61622
She seems impressed by this. "I had heard that you were unusually principled, I can see that this was not an exaggeration. Unfortunately those other fellows were not as flame retardant as your friend. Their corpses are not recoverable without an ashtray," she says with a callously dismissive smirk, as though they really don't matter to her anyway. "Will your friend the backflipping Monster Truck be joining us?"
ed/oZ
?
No.61624
61625
1289717__safe_artist-colon-pencils_edit_princess celestia_oc_oc-colon-padlock_choker_clerical robes_comic_comic-colon-anon's pie adventure_cropped_di (3).png
>>61623
Trumpaladin makes a note to himself about the total cremation of human corpses, the efficiency of it, and something about Auschwitz
"I'm sure you already know who she is. Better not to let her out of our sights.

Are you sure there's not a little bit left?" Holding up his fingers to illustrate
\r
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61625
61626
>>61624
"Oh, finding little bits is not a concern, the problem is determining which bits of ash come from the four you are referring to, and which bits originate from other similarly cremated fools, er excuse me, infiltrators. Speaking of which, I can see by the fact that our robots are unconcerned by your presence that you have IDs. Since those 4 were assets of Cardashil, what are your intentions?"
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61626
61627
>>61625
"Well I'd like to resurrect some of these infiltrators as well. We have a qualm with them, same as you. As for the IDs, those were stolen by the rogue. The sole purpose of taking those was to avoid the robots."
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61627
61628
>>61626
"If you mean the thieves, they have so far evaded capture. Cardashil is always being snuck or broken into. Everyone wants a slice of what we have, but very few have the talent to make it, surely you've seen the line outside. Those four,... wait a second," she turns and fixes Trump with a harsh stare. "Why four IDs?"
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61628
61629
>>61627
sighs
"I don't know if it's because she likes stealing things, or if she was intending to provide IDs for the other two party members present. One of whom is the burnt steak who did not receive an ID in time, and the other is now outside of Cardishore"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61629
61630
>>61628
"Four of you then," she thinks again for a moment. "I don't suppose your associates are talented in their own right? The steak was certainly courageous, if ill advised,...."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61630
61631
>>61629
"But of course. The rogue is as talented in disguise, hiding, and thieving as any of those elves, besides other special powers. My associate Fae had finished her third year in Seminary, and is a talented fighter in her own right. Quite fast on her feet, agile, and good looking as well. She's outside. There are more to our group, but they are no where near the city. This was just intended as a detour on a larger trip."
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61631
61632 61633
Meanwhile, Torcuil and Death arrive first to Trump Tower, and find Lenos and Thez in an exchange, the latter of whom is almost visibly steaming.
"... last time I let him run off without me! I can't even empathically communicate with him. The only reason I know he's in the shit is because of a dream!" she exclaims as the two of them realize Torcuil and Death's arrival.
>>61630
She smirks, "Cardashil? A detour? What a foolish notion. Still, I would be interested to learn more about what you can do. Perhaps we can work out a business arrangment of sorts," she says as they arrive at the gates.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61632
61635
>>61631
"Well, I can't say I know much about Cardishore, to be honest. It's reputation does not much extend to Port Barry or to Sparintenar. Even the drow elf we captured only knew you had money. We only know that people go in, but never come out.

Now, tell me more about this business arrangement you have in mind?"
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61633
61645
>>61631
"Er... Sorry, are we interrupting something?"
>>61619
Snek trys conveying the fact that it's okay.
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61634
>>61618
I know the feel.
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61635
61636 61638
>>61632
"Oh, that's not accurate at all. This fair city has contracts all over the world, and for the many who are not accepted as performers, we have a variety of different opportunities for them to seek employment elsewhere. It isn't that they don't return, its that they have more to pursue than to go back to," she says confidently. "As for business, I mean show business! I can already tell you have a flair for the dramatic, I'm sure there are a variety of highly lucrative opportunities, not least the contracts of those four, which as of now are vacant."

ed/oZ
?
No.61636
61637
[1d20+27 = 35]
>>61635
Definitely doing a sense motive check on these two statements
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61637
>>61636
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hiding something
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61638
61642
>>61635
Trumpaladin stops before entering the gate

"I must say that I feel like there is more you are not telling me. What is going on in Cardishore? Why was I told of a relation between Durpistan and Cardishore?"
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61639
Roleplaying-Is-Magic-Season Two Edition.pdf

Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61640
Adventure Time (D20) - CORE RULES.pdf

Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61641
Roleplaying is Magic, Season Three Edition.pdf
Season 3
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61642
61643
>>61638
"There's plenty I'm not telling you. What, do you expect me to detail the entire infrastructure of the city? Since you mentioned Durpistan, which I hear that some of your associates have laid waste to the place, that was reserved for the absolute dregs who have no business in civilized society. They were given homes, jobs, and a place of relative safety and security, where their incompetence would not affect the world outside it, while helping to resource essential minerals. The loss is not big, and our demand for mining resources is very limited, but other cities and nations might not feel the same."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61643
61644 61658
>>61642
sighs again, more loudly
"That was the doing of one member of our group in particular. It took place without my knowledge or consent, and I absolutely would not have approved of it.

Now, are you actually taking me to recover the corpse?"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61644
61646
>>61643
"I had thought we would acquire the blades first, since that just amounts to stopping by the warehouse. I also thought we might wait for Mr. Gorplemonger, who seems to be lost in thought."
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61645
61647
>>61633
"Where did you take him!" Thez demands. "What has that damned fool gotten himself into?!"
ed/oZ
?
No.61646
61648
[1d20+27 = 29]
>>61644
Sense motive on this statement
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61647
61648
>>61645
"Me? I...

Who are we talking about again?"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61648
61649 61650
>>61646
It seems legit. She looks at him curiously. "Is there something wrong?"
>>61647
"THAT ..." she calms herself a bit, "buffoon of a bull," she says more levelly.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61649
>>61648
"I want to ask you again about the Emperor. How do you feel about the Court City?"
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61650
61651
>>61648
"What did Infernius get himself into this time?"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61651
61652 61653
>>61650
"That's what I wanna know! You were driving when everyone left, I'm hoping you can give me an idea where he disembarked."
As she replies, Stix and Snek arrive back at the Tower, in conclusion of their venture.
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61652
61656
>>61651
"Uh, I dropped him and Trump off at a Spartan banquet before meeting with the gnomes"
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61653
61656
>>61651
“Alright, I’m back.”
Notices the intensity
“Is... everything alright?”
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61654
The-Savage-World-of-My-Little-Pony-4th-Edition.pdf

Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61655
Kingdoms of Ooo.pdf
Savage-Worlds-MLP-Edition.pdf

Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61656
61660 61661
>>61653
"Infernius did something stupid," Lenos says dryly.
>>61652
"Can you take me there?"
"I'm going too. He's my apprentice, no one gets to abuse him except ME," Lenos interjects. Thez glares at him, and he makes a "psssh" sound.
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61657
>>61616
>Unconsciousness intensifies
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61658
61662
>>61643
CAST ZONE OF TRUTH on the area of That Bitch

"Alright, let me ask you this more directly. What will be waiting for us on the other side of that portal?"
9PmiK
?
No.61659
[1d20 = 4]

Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61660
61662
>>61656
"Uh, yeah I could. I'll have to get everything ready though."
it is at this point I must leave for a couple hours. Feel free to take over Torc for me GM
Torc turns to Death and apologizes about having to leave early.
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61661
>>61656
Dawww lennos cares.
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61662
61663 61724
>>61658
Her eyes narrow. "Mr. Trump, I'm not sure what you're on about, but I interpret this as an act of hostility. You expressed an interest in acquiring your ally's equipment, and thats what we are going to do," she says holding up her ID, showing that the location "Surplus Warehouse" has been selected but not activated. "Furthermore, you said that you wish to acquire your foolish friend, and that also is what we are going to do. While I am willing to overlook this insult, you must appreciate that you have no power here, and behavior of this kind will not be tolerated."
>>61660
"Can I watch? I'm not allowed to participate, but it could be fun to tag along, as long as a job doesn't come up."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61663
61664 61669
>>61662
He looks at her, then eases up
"Alright. Sorry, I just get paranoid.

To lighten up the mood, why don't you tell me more about yourself? Not trade secrets or trade dress or anything, just those things I should know but don't"
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61664
>>61663
>race mixing whore.
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61669
61670
>>61663
She raises an eyebrow. "If you wish to conduct an interview, you can contact the agency."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61670
61672
>>61669
"What agency is that?"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61672
61674
>>61670
"The Cardashil Administration Agency - CAA - who manages the whole of the city as well as relations with everyone from outside."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61674
61676
>>61672
"Fascinating. I take it you're a hired performer, but not an agent or administrator?"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61676
61677 61678
Meanwhile Thez, satisfied by Torcuil's information turns to Stix, "We might be in for some shit. We still haven't heard back from Trump, Tracy, or Fae either. We might be in for some shit. I'll understand if you don't wish to join us," she says, but then smiles. "I will say though, you impressed me earlier. It takes guts to assault an unknown enemy, especially one that is obviously and readily beating professional peacekeepers."
>>61674
"I'm a little bit of all three. Since I make the most money for the city, I'm the de facto figurehead until someone else succeeds me."
ed/oZ
?
No.61677
61679 61680
>>61676
"So does Cardishore sell like films and Broadway shows?"
\r
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61678
61680
>>61676
“Of course I want to come with you guys. I may not be the best fighter, but that isn’t going to stop me from helping out the best I know how. Besides, with you guys on the case, we have this in the bag.”
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61679
>>61677
*Gets lobotomized by minotuar brothers*
*watch emotionalessly as the >rape thez*
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61680
61681 61683
>>61678
She smiles warmly at this. "I'd hoped you might say that," she says tossing a ring to him. "I figure it should work if you put it on your tail. Otherwise, we can get you a harness or necklace or something.
>Ring of Telekinesis acquired, Stix can now use Telekinesis on command, comparable to a Unicorn, enabling full and unrestricted use of his bow.
>>61677
"Pardon? We do all kinds of media and entertainment, as well as innovating new types and styles."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61681
61682
>>61680
"Oh really? What's the latest in style?"
Trumpaladin holds up the ID, as if eagerly awaiting what she can show him
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61682
61684 61685
>>61681
"Here's a more recent performance which has been highly acclaimed. You might like it," she replies.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fsql523bSj4
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61683
61686
>>61680
“Huh... alright.”
Puts ring on tail
“Kind of a funny thing wear into combat, but I’ll take it.”
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61684
>>61682
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61685
61686
>>61682
"Fascinating. I bet our red bull would love that. You sure he'll still be there after we go by the warehouse?"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61686
61687 61688
>>61685
"Unless his corpse is capable of getting up and walking away," she scoffs amusedly.
>>61683
Well, most wear them on their fingers,... but in your case,....
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61687
61689
>>61686
“I like it. Now, where exactly are we headed?”
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61688
61689
>>61686
"Who reviews fresh talent? Are the Auditions made into a televised show, or are they behind closed doors?
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61689
61690 61691 61692
>>61687
"Sparintenar," she says grimly, drawing out her disguise mask and placing it on her head like a hat.
>>61688
"Some are, others go through different channels. Its a diverse and elaborate network of application and organization. You'd know all about it if you actually came in the front door," she says with a smirk.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61690
61693
>>61689
"Sorry about that..."
looks away
"The rogue seemed to have had a bad experience when she tried that last time.

Anyways, what awaits those who do go through?"
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61691
>>61689
“Alright. I have no clue where that is, but I’m ready to head out if you are.”
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61692
>>61689
Is a black couch involved?
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61693
61694
>>61690
"Depends on what they can do, how talented they are, the demand for their abilities, and a slough of other considerations. It is a lengthy process and quite tedious, but that's because at the completion of it the applicant can be set up for life to the degree of extravagance that their contracts bring in, not to mention the fame and prestige."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61694
61695
>>61693
"Does all that happen before they are given an ID and come up to the park here?"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61695
61696 61697
>>61694
"Correct, and most don't come to the park. There are cases where the applicant is not talented enough and requires more training (which is provided), or they may not be suited to performing at all and instead are viable in a technical capacity. I really can't imagine this to be very interesting though," she says, showing signs of boredom.
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61696
>>61695
"Provided"
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61697
61698
>>61695
"Well I am interested in the efficient distribution and utilization of human resources, since it is in a way my own profession. But tell me what is interesting to you"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61698
61699 61708
>>61697
"I am, and little else," she says activating the gate. As the portal opens, through it Trump can see a wide and brightly lit hallway with doors periodically located along the corridor. At the end of the hallway it veers to the right which can't be seen, but not before there's a large door with the words "Confiscations". With only a moment's hesitation, she strides through the gate, waiting for Trump and Tracy on the other side.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61699
61700
>>61698
The gate seems trustworthy enough. Step through with pony
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61700
61702 61710
>>61699
As they step through, the gate closes behind. Looking to his ID, Trump can see that he could activate the gate if he wants per the programming of its previous owner.

In case he's paranoid and thinks he's trapped or something. That bitch leads the way down the hallway arriving at the indicated door which she opens, walks through, and then holds the door open for them to follow. Inside the room there's a window with a door next to it. This room is the same bright white of the hallway, and behind the window is a very short fellow in a midnight blue robe. "ID please, he says, not looking up from his own ID, which he is lazily watching media on.
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61701
61705 61724
Meanwhile back at the Tower, Torcuil leads to the airship taking position at the wheel. Thez opens her bracelet and inspects its contents, nodding with satisfaction as she does so.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61702
61704
>>61700
Trumpaladin steps through and into the room
"Interesting"
He holds up his ID
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61703
*gets disem- bowled*
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61704
61707 61711
>>61702
He grabs another device and points it toward Trump, still not looking up from his ID. The device beeps and the short man drones, "Requested belongings?"
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61705
>>61701
Stix gets onboard the airship
“What do you suppose the situation is over there? What are we up against?”
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61706
Lenos stops buy the bar in the tower to leave his tankard cracks his knuckles rolls hos shoulders and heads for the airship with a very irritated look o. His face
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61707
61709
>>61704
This is probably best for TF
"An efficient quiver with a number of knives, both magical and non-magical in nature. They are not under my name, but under something like Tracy Cage or..." *sighing* "'Mrs. Sentry'"
Mrs. Sentry
ed/oZ
?
No.61708
>>61698
Tracy uses what ever magic she doesn't actually have to reveal illusion, or whatever item she got 4 months ago that hasn't been mentioned until this moment

>"I do not trust this woman. Let me kill her flashy"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61709
>>61707
YAY!!!
Now catch up faggot! Xp
ed/oZ
?
No.61710
61712
[3d20 = 22]
[1d20+50 = 68]
>>61700
Bridget pulls out the ID to the page where it would connect with the gate. She practices activating it herself, so she can have a +2 on use magic device checks later. She goes through, only on Brad's insistence.

She searches for traps in stealth, then stealthily moves silently up the hallway, searching for traps. Also roll listen checks. Add +60 modifiers to the last three dice
ed/oZ
?
No.61711
61714
[1d20+26 = 38]
>>61704
Tracy approaches the man in a disguise and makes sure he can't see her. But he tells him her name anyways

In a very stern and irritated voice she says
"The name is 'Mrs. Sentry." I left several of my knives here a while ago. I want them back"

She eyes his device.

Is there like a pen or something that she can steal, or is that attacked to the desk in one of those small bead chains. Either way, she steals it. Rolling sleight of hand.
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61712
61713
>>61710
+60? And what item(s) now? I don't recall her having magical detection spells or equipment
Brad's Faggot
ed/oZ
?
No.61713
61714
>>61712
It's me being bored
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61714
61716
>>61713
I feel like such a noob. Still, that'll work.
>>61711
Nothing to steal, but as Tracy says the name the man seems confused and actually looks up. As he does so, his face flashes for a moment with alarm, while That Bitch is impatiently looking at her own ID.
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61715
61718
"Uhm, yes of course. I will need the proper ID then," he says, appearing obviously nervous to Trump.
ed/oZ
?
No.61716
61717
[1d20+13 = 20]
>>61714
Rolling to intimidate. Use the Cloak of Initimadation to increase points.
"Give. Me. My. Knives. Their names are 'Dark' and 'Edgy'. "
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61717
>>61716
"Of course, but I'll need the ID they're associated with, this Mrs. Sentry," he's a little panicked now.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61718
61719
>>61715
Trumpaladin explains to the man:
"I don't believe she acquired an ID at the time she went through. But this lady right here, she has an ID"
Trumpaladin points to the Bitch, who I'm sure is scary enough to make him shit himself
"Please don't keep her waiting. I am sure she is very busy"
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61719
61720 61723
>>61718
"Y, yes. RIght away. Without an ID, that would mean they would be," he gulps audibly, "in miscellaneous."
He looks down at his ID, and keys at it for a moment, peeking at Trump and Tracy nervously as he does so.
Mrs. Sentry
ed/oZ
?
No.61720
61721
>>61719
What kind of objects is he wearing? Does he have any items in his shirt pocket, for instance? Is he in arm's reach?
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61721
61722
>>61720
No, he's separated by a window. He's wearing the cloak I mentioned, with his hood down exposing his face. After inputting into his device he just sort of sits there, now visibly sweating, and looking around nervously.

I suppose I should describe him. He bears a resemblance to Bilbo in the Hobbit, but doesn't appear to be a hobbit, he's just short. That bitch however, does look like a hobbit.
Mrs. Sentry
ed/oZ
?
No.61722
>>61721
"Damn halfings" Tracy mutters to herself

"Could you hurry it up? I haven't got all day"

Tracy decides to take a page from That Bitch and Bilbo, and looks at her device. She looks at where they are on the map. There's a geolocater, right?
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61723
>>61719
"This fine lady told me they were famous enough to become a meme. Surely you know where they are"
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61724
61725
>>61662
Torc seems slightly surprised by Death's response
"Yeah, you can come. I wouldn't mind the company."
>>61701
>"I fucking swear if you start singing again."
"Let me guess, you dangle me over the side again?"
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61725
61726
>>61724
Stix snickers at Torc’s remark, especially at the fact it happened before. He starts picturing how it would play out.
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61726
61727
>>61725
>"I'm taking his side on this one, it was funny"
"Fuck you"
>"The feeling is mutual"
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61727
61728 61729
>>61726
“Do you know what kind of trouble awaits us at this city?”
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61728
>>61727
My guess would be the fun type
*malicious chuckle*
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61729
61730
>>61727
"Trouble? My best guess is McRib, Stabby, and M'liege pissed off the locals."
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61730
61732
>>61729
“And should the locals fight us, what would we be up against?”
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61731
61733 61734 61736
Someone abused my pet/apprentice there will be blood or ash
*rubs hands maliciously*
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61732
61736
>>61730
"Er, a very well... trained... military...

Wanna help me inspect the cannons? I have a feeling we could need them."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61733
61735
>>61731
You don't have a pet!
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61734
>>61731
D'awww thanks lenos
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61735
>>61733
Glares molevolently
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61736
61737
>>61731
Stix takes a step away from lenos.
>>61732
“Good idea. I haven’t operated one before. If you can show me the ropes I’m sure I can get the hang of it.”
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61737
61738
>>61736
"Oh operating them is the easiest part. Hell, even Mr. Snek can do it."
>"Is that an insult?"
"Anyway. I wanna inspect them, because one just recently exploded in the middle of a battle."
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61738
61739
>>61737
“That ought to ruin your day. Let’s make sure that doesn’t happen again.”
Follows Torc
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61739
61740
>>61738
Torc heads over too the first cannon
"So, what do you think of our strange group so far?"
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61740
61741
>>61739
“You are all insane, but I guess I fit in well. What a welcome though... a ninja bombs me, you fall in from the roof, and things have been mayhem from there. But I like it so far. What are your thoughts on it?”
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61741
>>61740
"Eh, I've only been killed once by them so I guess I can't complain. But they're nice, and definitely insane."
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61742
61743
As everyone gets bored of waiting, and as the short fellow behind the counter gets increasingly anxious, his ID suddenly makes a "Ding". Upon hearing this, the fellow gets observably relieved. He looks up at Tracy and Trump and smiles with a hint of malice.
>cast Teleport Greater
"So long fuckers!" and disappears with a bang.
This was most unexpected, particularly for That Bitch, who had likewise gotten tired of waiting on what should have been a relatively simple process. The attendant is now absent, and Tracy, Trump, and That Bitch, are standing in this waiting-room wondering what just happened.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61743
61744 61745
>>61742
"It's a fucking Transgender Elf, isn't it?"
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61744
>>61743
Kek
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61745
1521776792140.jpg
>>61743

Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61746
61747 61749
At the same time the airship, which has been making expedient progress toward Sparintenar, arrives. I could force those in attendance to struggle through the requisite dialogues to determine where their actual destination is, but that strikes me as cumbersome especially since I overloaded myself with multitasking. Tl;dr, the airship team determines - not before Thez assumed Infernius' appearance by way of her disguise mask - that they went to Cardashil.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61747
>>61746
Trumpaladin says to That Bitch
"Well shit. The gender benders struck here too. Well can we check and see if the knives are still there?"
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61748
Lenos starts pacing the deck impatiently grumbling to himself about his pet i mean apprentice
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61749
61750 61751
>>61746
Now how in the hell could they possibly determine that?
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61750
>>61749
Magicks
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61751
>>61749
Forcefiully. Thez is of the mind to assert/demand "Where did I go", since she's currently displaying Infernius' appearance. This would have startled and confused the Spartans present, but it would been a matter of minutes not hours to determine 'which fucking wy'.
69J36
?
No.61752
61753 61754
[1d20+23 = 28]
"Yo yo ho and a bottle of ruuuuum"
>"Here we go again"
Snek hangs Torc over the edge of the ship
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61753
>>61752
"You think this can stop me?
Fifteen men on the whole ships list..."
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61754
>>61752
Holds back some laughter
“Hey now Mr Snek... that’s not how you handle this. We have a brig right?”
Can’t hold back laughing anymore
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61755
61756 61757 61758 61759
Continues grumbling to self getting more and more agitated and starts to smoke with the heat of his building anger "WHATS TAKING SO LONG TORC I NEED TO KILL SOMETHING"
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61756
>>61755
"We'll be there soon enough." Torc says from his upisde position off the ship
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61757
61758
>>61755
Glares at everyone on the airship
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61758
61759
>>61755
“Umm... are you supposed to be giving off smoke like that?” he says with noticeable concern
>>61757
Backs away slowly
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61759
>>61755
>>61758
Shrugs shoulders and looks for something alcoholic to drink
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61760
61761 61762 61765
I'm sorry for being such a gay lil' fuck today.. a bunch of shit came up...

Could I get a quick rundown?
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61761
>>61760
HE LIVES
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61762
61763
>>61760
The Lady was being kind and led us to the warehouse where Tracy's knives are. But then the guard there teleported away, so he's probably a transgender elf. We don't know if the knives are still there or not
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61763
61764
>>61762
>Elvenniggers could be using her daggers right now
"Reeeeeeeeeeee!"
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61764
>>61763
*hugs horsey to calm her*
"There there little pony. We'll track them all down and brutally murder them, don't you worry"
*pats her head*
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61765
61766
>>61760
Also torc snek thez stix and lenos are heading for cardashil on the airship
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61766
61767 61768 61770 61778
>>61765
Did someone call for them?
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61767
61769
>>61766
Nope! We need to hurry up and get our work done before those chucklefucks fuck every thing up
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61768
61771
>>61766
Thez has magic’d your location via Infernius dream and has called us there to aid
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61769
61776
>>61767
So, what's the current situation?
Can Tracy explore the warehouse?
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61770
>>61766
In a sense enferniuos is unconscious and thez is flipping out as well as lenos and they are now out for blood thez knows something is wrong becaise of her empathic link with enferniuos
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61771
61772 61774 61778
>>61768
Where is Thez then?
Anonymous
0/9/S
?
No.61772
>>61771
On the airship heading for cardashil
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61773
61778
"welp I need sleep"
Torc decides to sleep for the rest of the voyage to reset his spells
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61774
>>61771
On the ship with the rest of us, headed you way fast
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61775
61777 61778
Is Tracy/Brad still in disguise?
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61776
>>61769
I do not know. Trumpaladin is wait for That Bitch to respond and to lead us to the knives - if they are still there - herself
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61777
>>61775
Brad is, but That Bitch unambiguously knows it is Trumpaladin. I am less sure if she knows Tracy is Tracy. She acts like she does not, but I am unsure
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61778
61781 61784 61824 61825
>>61766
Infernius did, in a dream
>>61771
On the airship, which is essentially arriving at Cardashil, after a brief stop at Sparintenar where they had to determine that Infernius, Tracy and Trump weren't there, and where they went.
>>61773
Real sleep, or character sleep?
>>61775
Yes. They're currently at the reception desk where one would otherwise retrieve their belongings, except when Tracy and Trump entered and asked, the short guy in robes got all scared and awkward. No one picked up on it, they thought that was normal, and so they sat there waiting, while the short fellow in the robe, who was the same illusionist who pulled a fast on in the temple, was able to stall and allow his accomplices to escape. Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego.
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61779
61780
I'm only barely conscious, tbh...
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61780
61783
>>61779
Can you throw ice water on yourself to keep going? Or do you think you will be ok?
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61781
61782
>>61778
To the Bitch
"Well you want to search the warehouse and assess the damage?"
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61782
61786
>not stabbing every NPC first and asking questions later
And you call yourselves murder hobos.
>>61781
"I want to check things out anyway."
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61783
>>61780
I'll survive.
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61784
61785
>>61778
Character sleep, you aren't getting rid of me that easy
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61785
61787
>>61784
>inb4 he falls asleep anyways
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61786
61788
>>61782
Trumpaladin appears anxious. It's not abnormal, but he is definitely anxious
"Go ahead, little pony. If the Lady allows you anyways. I need to get to Infernius"
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61787
61790
>>61785
Fucking rude.
But not tonight, I'll fucking chug caffeine if I have too
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61788
61789
>>61786
Tracy lets out a sigh
>"Fine, I promise not to kill her for no reason."
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61789
>>61788
>"WHY WOULD YOU EVEN THINK OF THAT"
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61790
61791
>>61787
Just playing with ya.

Stix rests beside Torc.
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61791
61795
>>61790
Like in the next bed?

Did we forget to tell you the airship has beds?
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61793
>>61792
*pets pony*
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61794
61797
Tracy follows That Bitch.
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61795
61798
>>61791
Yep. You guys forgot. I was picturing those hammocks and Stix would be on the floor next to him. But a bed works nice. He takes a bed nearby.
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61796
>>61792
*Pets faggot*
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61797
>>61794
Or rather, is the entrance to the warehouse visible?
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61798
61799
>>61795
We need to get better at telling you things.
"Night Hoers"
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61799
>>61798
“Sleep well meme magician.”
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61800
61801
*looks around awkwardly as faggot tries to make sense of things*
ed/oZ
?
No.61801
61802
[1d20+20 = 34]
>>61800
*Picks up pony to cradle*
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61802
>>61801
I thought he left?
*Tries to read through thread*
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61803
61804 61805
>tfw when i just lost 20 pounds of hair.
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61804
61805
20170914_014604.jpg
>>61803

Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61805
61806 61807 61809
>>61803
>>61804
I know that feeling

Is that everyone?
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61806
61810
>>61805
Sorry for being so long.
I had to get the knots out and my dad was on the pc.
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61807
>>61805
I’m here.
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61809
61810
>>61805
Nah it's fine, hair can be a bit of a bitch.
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61810
61811
>>61809
I meant that for
>>61806

Also, before we start...
Hi /overboard/, sorry about the >rape
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61811
>>61810
If you are reading this join us you faggots.
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61812
61813 61814 61815 61818
I'm getting ready to pass out...
Anonymous
Tzjcc
?
No.61813
61814
>>61812
Darn it. Well, goodnight. See you next time
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61814
>>61813
>>61812
Drink some coffee you faggot.
Anonymous
69J36
?
No.61815
>>61812
Night faggot, see ya later
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61816
61817 61818
I'll lurk for a bit longer.
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61817
61819
>>61816
Drink some coffee you faggot.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61818
61821
>>61816
>>61812
Trumpaladin starts rocking the pony back and forth, and nuzzles the pony
Mrs. Sentry
XUORR
?
No.61819
61820 61823
>>61817
I literally can't, for reasons I'd rather not talk about...
I'm sorry..
Anonymous
aMl60
?
No.61820
>>61819
Its okay man
*hugs faggot*
Get some rest.
Anonymous
XUORR
?
No.61821
61822
>>61818
*Faggot trades life-span to muster up the energy for one last post*

*Sits*
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61822
>>61821
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Anonymous
9PmiK
?
No.61823
>>61819
Today especially, and entirely in spite of every intention, careful plan, and expressive and meticulous agenda, I has those feels.
Anonymous
ed/oZ
?
No.61824
61825 61826 61827 61828
milo_shrug.png
>>61778
First off, I wasn't paying attention at first because I was busy enjoying my Tracy impression.

Second, it's super subtle at first. This guy is at work and not paying attention on his phone when he's approached by a VIP and two other people. There's a description that when he looks up he is "confused" and "his face flashes for a moment with alarm." But the very next words are "while That Bitch is impatiently looking at her own ID." The logical conclusion is that he looked up and saw that the woman who owns his boss is present, and he was embarrassed as fuck for being on his phone and playing around while at work. I can tell you that many times I've been on my phone at work, heard the voice of a supervisor, and been scared as all fuck because I've been caught wasting time on my phone. You have a strong tendency to portray low level worker NPCs as incompetent boobs (especially anyone near the saw mill), and there's not really a reason to think the $10 an hour workers of Cardishill would be any better. So when the guard acts nervous for being caught not paying attention in the presence of his boss's boss, there's nothing at all bizarre, especially when the behavior is just 2 adjectives in two posts.

In the next post, the guy's behavior is less subtle and kind of out of the ordinary after an intimidation check is made against him. I made the post "Rolling to intimidate... 'Give. Me. My. Knives.'" And in response to this the guy is "visibly panicked" and later "audibly gulps." Well no shit he's visibly panicked, he's just been intimidated in the post that post was a response to. What else are low level NPCs supposed to do in response to intimidation checks of 20 except be intimidated? Especially since he's just been caught fucking around on the job in the presence of his boss. So yeah, of course he's going to panic and gulp while he displays his incompetence in completing a basic task in front of both his boss's boss and a very intimidating rogue.

"We'll get 'em next time"

Trumpaladin leaves the rogue to look for clues or her knives or whatever can be recovered from the situation, while Trumpaladin kindly asks the Lady to lead him to Infernius
ed/oZ
?
No.61825
>>61824
>>61778
Reason number 4: Of course the scene was super long and dragged out. You explained earlier that you wanted to wait for Tracy's Faggot for some scenes. So it made sense that you'd drag out the process of getting the knives back in hopes that TF showed up by the time we got to it, since TF is the one who wanted the knives.
\r