653 replies and 62 files omitted.
>>23285Thez taps her mask and suddenly appears to being one of those oversized prom dresses, except with funeral colors
>>23289Port Barry national IDs?
>>23289>Let humans elves and dwarves pass freelyDrow are elves. Korak is a dwarf. That's not necessarily going to help anyone.
>>23288we assign them an insignificant item.
>>23287i have no idea im looking through spell lists and other stuff right now.
>>23290This
>>23291Drows are excluded and Korak would have been harmless
>>23293Passports!
>>23294i like the passport idea.
>>23293>an insignificantA lot of port barry's residents are sailor's or fishermen though. Parties interested in entering the port could do so by stealing said items from the sailors while they're traveling.
>>23295None that were readily known
>>23298That does not answer my question
>>23297Photo ID
>>23299Yes, but wouldn't a Tarasque just leave items like gems alone?
>>23300>Photo IDThat would require border agents to check every individual as they go in and out though...
>leave items like gems aloneIt matters how fucked-up the dungeon is...
>>23301Yeah, but an enemy with just 10 ranks in Disguise could fool the system.
>>23298>>23290>>23284>>23285>>23281Well, that entire conversation and everything was retconned when the timeline was reset. That scene had depicted the entire group together. But instead, the timeline reset with Trumpaladin being away at that point. So Tracy never hears "don't you dare spend them," doesn't place the gems in the dungeon, and the gems remain either in the treasure holding area or the bag
>>23302Have you never gone through an airport in a foreign country? Have you never gone through an airport in this country after 2005? This is normal
>>23303Let alone an Assassin class enemy. Or an Epic Infiltrator.
>This is normalI guess so\\, but idk how medieval fishermen would like having to go through customs every time they commute from work/home.
This doesn't even touch on the possibility of Teleportation.
>>23303one of the steps to get in is to strip down to their loin clothes.
>>23306>teleportationHence the magic field
>assassinsIf that's the only people who can get in then I'd say we're pretty secure
>>23307Yeah, but then every sailor/fisherman in the Port would have to do that every day.
There's also the Disguise Self and Control Shape spells.
>>23303>>23306I think we can just assume that all of the people in this universe who could have leveled up to be strong rogues or assassins decided to spend all of their ranks on Blackguard instead, and so missed the opportunity
>>23310punch em in the gut so they lose concentration.
>>23312>punch every fisherman in the gut to get into his own city>>23311You've never met the Drow before.
>>23313You better not have fucked us all over with the gems
>>23313im sure they would understand if we explained some things.
>>23315He's just trying to distract you from the fact he may have lost all of Thez's money
>>23308>Hence the magic fieldDo you mean, like a Dimensional Anchor spell on the whole city?
>>23317>>23319Maybe
I'm saying that the conversation itself was retconned, so the gems were never moved. I'm also saying that if they were in the dungeon, they are inorganic and tasteless so the Tarasque would not have eaten them. They are also tiny and insanely hard, so they are unlikely to have been destroyed when it went through.
But if the gems are gone, we may have to sell Tracy and all of her stuff so we have money
>>23319Why the actual fuck did you not just say that instead of "because I can and want to?" >>23329I could've sworn I had Tracy tell her,
shortly after she returned.Did Thez ever take her Staff back btw? If not, it's still in the quiver.
GM, is every room in the Dungeon kill, or does it just have a big tunnel driven through it?
>>23336I really do hope you've learned somethingReminder to GM that it's really hard to break diamonds, especially unintentionally
>>23335HARAM
>>23337THE TERASQUE could have eaten them.
>>23338They are gems, not meat. Entirely tasteless. Why would it eat them?
>>23339it has the swallow whole ability so it could have been by accident.
>>23340There were no animals to swallow whole
Also, I think the tarasque would have started in the dungeon, so it would have been tiny
>>23341there were rotting corpses in her dungeon right?
>>23342>rottingNo, just dried hides and a few animal bones.
>>23342Hopefully not close to the Gems. I still think that conversation got reteconned
I wish we had the chance to fight those Trolls... I was going to paralyze one and tie it to a tree with barbed wire so Tracy could keep cutting off its head and limbs, to farm troll bones.
>>23343Look, I know you don't like me because of some autistic game involving post numbers or whatever your reason is, but you need to stop acting on spite in the game. It always ends up hurting Inferius, which pisses him off, and then Torcuil sees the three of us arguing, which pisses him off, and then GM sees the four of us arguing and he is pissed off that he has to deal with our autistic drama. Stop keeping secrets in game to spite other characters for things their players do outside of game. If you have complaints about site moderation, or whatever your issue with me is, take it to the /qa/ board.
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>>23346the gm loves our autistic drama though.
>when I should be going home, but my room is still occupied by my brother and sister in law, and my parents will ask me if I've heard back from the last two interviews
>>23350Aura of butter sounds over powered
>>23354Thank you.
It was edited from the parody of this, if you didn't already see.
>>23345Ponimaru said a troll village probably exists. I think I'll lead an NPC party to go exterminate them
>>23356ill be happy to accompany you with some gestapo personnel.
>>23347We do need to get experience with our armies in combat
>>23336The soil has been so rearranged that everthing that is still 'there' is impossible to locate.
>>23356Idk. I will slaughter trolls, brutally and irrationally cruelly, if they attack, but otherwise I just find them fun to keep around (i find them funny, and cute in a way). I wouldn't just go there just to genocide them, because then there'd be no more trolls, and I'd feel sad.
Trolls are some of my favorite field monsters, in more ways than one.
>>23360Could it ever be rebuilt into a new hideout? It's basically just gone back to being a cave, right?
>>23360The placing of the gems was retconned. The gem thing was in response to something Thez said which was in response to something Trumpakadin said. But then when I said "Trumpaladin definitely spends the night with slovenia" the whole intervening set of character interactions got wiped away
>>23361>doesn't believe in genocideThat's why Inferius and I will be doing it
>>23364Just don't kill them all. Best to keep a sustainable troll population, for game.
>>23362Sure, and a hideout with cool stuff buried here and there.
>>23368It was mostly full of raw materials, scavenged metal, and the bones of the local wildlife.
>>23366Their life cycle is pretty long though..
Oh well..
>>23371Too much work.
Better just to ignore the one cave they're already breeding in, and let them think their under the radar.
>>23371>>23370>>23366No. Stop. He already saved the Tarrasque from extinction, and I don't think we've benefited from it. Stop trying to make sure this universe is full of more evil enemies than it needs to be. A single troll village that threatens the town logging industry and hikers is destroyed? I promise you, there are more trolls and other always chaotic evil races further away from the people we are trying to protect, if the preservation of evil creatures is what most interests you
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>>23372We can't even collect wood without having trolls try to eat the loggers. No. Fuck that. We need wood
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>>23375
There's always shit to fight
You said the cloak and the ring would take a few days? Would they be ready by next session?
Can I get a reminder on the ring and cloak?
>>23378Cloak of Charisma and Ring of Evasion.
>>23358That isn't even his final form.
>>23381If your character gets over 9000 Str as a Cancer Mage, he/she can evolve.
>>23379Thank you. Hmmm. For one, characters are supposed to only be able to work on one item at a time (to completion) . Additionally, aside from post bazaar, Tracy hasn't put much time into either.
>>23383They're not important.
What about just the ring?
>>23382I wish i had over 9000 str...
[sad minotuar noises]
>>23387Its closed up for the night
>>23388i try and trak down that ork tribe in the mountains.
>>23386you have as much strength as the rest of the party combined. Shut up
>>23387Come craft with Tracy. We could make make more progress together.
>>23393The jibberniggers are something I do want to genocide.
>>23397Those are way beefy for these orcs. These orcs are all skinny and shriveled, like sjws
>>23399Orcs should be SJWs in this universe.
>>23398So, is this an exploration, investigation, or hunting trip?
Tracy never did check out that city beyond the cliff..
GM, does Slovenia want to start work on the trebuchets immediately, or is she interested in going into town for food first? Also, does she need help?
>>23406"Food? Yes, food,... that's a good idea," she already has a miniature prototype built, and her mane is slightly disorderly.
>>23405>>23404The city Tracy is talking about is in the same general direction as the last point that Infernius got shot at.
>>23407The ring can wait.
Is there time to check around that area?
>>23408Time? Sure, it is dark though, that will complicate things.
>>23410Thez emerges with Torcuil, now mummified, and padded in some areas. "Is something happening?"
>>23409Take a walk through the forest to Search the area.
>>23410Sure.
Tracy strolls around through the moonlight instead of sleeping, like a 'normal' criminally insane serial-killer/rapist does. Then she sees Inferius, trying to find his way through the dark.
"What are you doing up at this hour?"
>>23407"I myself haven't eaten, and I missed ramen earlier when we had to help rescue the loggers. I see you've been pretty busy as well. I'm rather impressed with the model you made. You're going to have to tell me all about it. Would you like to have dinner with me, perhaps in town?" Smiles
>>23411"we go investigate greenskins."
>>23412"me try to find way back to green skin camp."
>>23411"I've been meaning to get a peak at that city past the cliff. I thought it'd be better to go under the cover of dark."
>>23415"Greenskins? What are those?"
>>23413"My goodness, I don't think I've eaten anything,... today. I've been so fixated on the trebuchet,... its an amazing marvel of design. Dinner would be nice!"
>>23414Thez thinks for a moment. "Will there be beatings?"
>>23417"thing that shoot at me the other night look like a people but it have greenskin."
>>23418"maybe,if they try anything but me reach out to them and try civilize savages."
>>23419"That sounds like beatings,... mind if I tag along?"
>>23418>Will there be beatings"If anything gets in my way."
>>23419"You're going to get yourself killed in the dark. I'm headed through the forest, so why don't you follow me?"
>>23421"Sure. Why not?"
>>23421"me would be offended if you didnt."
>>23422"okay that be best me think."
>>23424THez squees a little. "You guys go on without me, I'll catch up quick, but I wanna try something!"
>>23418"I'm very glad to see you appreciate the engineering as much as I do. There's something about the terror and the power of the sling and shot that feels geninuneky.,. Glorious, when its let go. I can see already you'll do an excellent job of harnessing that power in all its beauty in the full scale models.
Might you be interested in going to my own restaurant in town, the Trump Grill. We have a wide variety of food options. Yes I know we have the kitchen here, but after all you've been through, and all you've accomplished, you deserve something a little more.. Special. Please, let's go, and tell me all about your plans"
>>23424"Alright, red guy. Follow me and try not to trip. Let's get moving. I don't have all night."
*leads the way through the dark forest*
>>23425Tracy gives Thez a quizzical look, but moves forward anyway.
Alright, so they both go into the forest.
Let's start with a he basic Spot Search and Listen checks to scan the area for SJWs and jibberniggers.
>>23425Trumpaladin goes, retrieves, and offers a brush to Slovenia, if she wants to fix her mane
>>23427"Its nothing bad!" she calls after, as she rushes to her room.
>>23429"Oh, yes of course. I should probably, thank you. I trust your judgement, I'll only be just a moment," she says stepping away,
>>23430>20Hey, there's one now and he hasn't noticed you yet.
>>23432Tracy doesn't want delays yet. Is there any hope of moving by him while towing a large, clumsy technicolor bull?
>>23433Thez pops her head from behind a rock and whispers. "You could follow him."
>>23434"Hey, fyi. One of those green things you mentioned earlier is up ahead. He hasn't seen us yet, but it'll be inconvenient if he does. Try not to be so loud and let me do my thing. Just walk several spaces behind me,
quietly, and we'll follow him back to his nest or whatever."
Tracy can get finicky when it comes to her stalking...
>>23432>I'll only just be a momentI know where this is going
>>23438A few moments later, she appears to have washed up, gotten the bits of wood out of her mane, and straightened it. "I hope I wasn't too long."
>>23436The orc appears to be gathering wood, and is entirely focused on some contemplation.
>>23437Tracy, with utmost stealth, furtively stalks the orc back towards whereverthefuck it's going, checking the surrounding area every so often, and signalling to Infernius to come a few steps closer in increments whenever she's determined the coast is clear.
This'll take a while..
[1d20 = 2]>>23439~OOOOOOrrr.. we could ignore him and silently move away from him and past him...
Actually, Tracy moves a bit closer to Listen to what he's focused on.
[2d20 = 17]>>23441Its in a completely different language, "Hibbity hooblah" is all she can make out.
>>23441"remeber we here in peace if the savages accept our friendship."
>>23446Thez peeks her head out of a shadow, and flashes hand-signals that somehow convey "But, muh beatings."
>>23443>tumblrese"Darn, it's been a while since I've heard this..."
>>23446"Shut up, bull. Let's keep moving."
*advances towards direction of the city*
>>23447>has almost gotten used to Thez's shenanigans, but still jumps a bit"One isn't enough to share. Let's find the pack first."
>>23439"By no means! You look fantastic, as graceful as the grove I plucked you from this morning. Now, let us waste no more time. Let's go.
I'm assuming you're a vegetarian?"
Trumpajadin walks with Slovebua to the Trump Grill
>>23447*hand signalizes back*
"if they deny us you can beat them sweetie"
>>23448*continues crouch walking*
How thick is the forest? Is the City far off?
*advances forward; still on the look-out for SJWs*
The orc finally gathers enough wood and makes its way purposefully. Before long, it comes across
>>23450"You assume wrong. Rigorous labor requires protein and lots of it."
>>23449You haven't EVEN seen her shenanigens yet! She lost her spells, so her skills will be much more 'in play'.
>>23451She doesn't seem to comprehend, but waves it off and sinks back into the shadow.
>>23453The city is more to the west of your current location. Not terribly far, but a good enough distance that it can't be seen. Also, the forest thickens as you follow the orc.
It comes across an area with dangled ropes and ladders. It loads the wood onto a platform, and then ascends a ladder. The platform raises upward as he ascends.
[3d20 = 15]>>23456Spot and Listen checks to sense how many creatures in the vincinity
Search check to get a feel of the top of the platform
"Hmmm.. That's something.."
*signals Infernius to come forward a few paces*
>>23454Trumpaladin gets an evil grin on his face
"Perfect. We've got the best meat selections. Just the best. Our angus steak is divine. You'll also love our Taco Bowls"
Trumpaladin realizes, to his horror, that Port Barry does not have a proper Barbeque shop
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>>23457Aww shart...
At least he's got +5 on the Listen and Spot checks.
Did she hear anything?
>>23455>>23454>>23458REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>23457I think you misunderstand. The platform is a sort of dumb-waiter, and continues ascending as the orc makes its way up. The tree the orc is climbing appears to have a large permanent platform further up, which the dumb-waiter is leading toward (and attached to).
>>23461*looks up at the tree*
What's the top look like? Any activity?
*contemplates burning-down tree to speed things up*
Bored. Posting Orc memes.
>>23465Don't spam the thread just because GM is occupied by work for a few minutes
>>23466I wish, my computer crashed cuz I had too many things running.
>>23462The platform is a large central circular shape, with ropes and lines running to other trees and smaller platforms. Though it is entirely uncharacteristic of orcs, these ones seem to live in trees.
>>23466I like orc memes though. I don't mean any rush; just felt like sharing some.
>>23467Tracy relays the information to Infernius, and asks for what he intended to do once he found the settlement.
>>23469She had it coming.
>liking the memes even though they probably crashed his shit
Except that these orcs are SJW-types and not mussies, its perfect
>>23470"bring them into the current year, and civilize them."
>>23469"It looks like they live up there. Now just what did you intend to do once you found them?"
>>23472Tracy makes an annoyed look, but restrains herself
"So what are you going to do? Knock on the front door?"
>>23472Thez appears from a pile of leaves nearby. "Civilize them? Hmmm. I don't know that they can be civilized, but they might make for good manual labor," she says before fwoofing back into the pile of leaves.
>>23474>>23473"enslavement does sound nice. we can make them convert too."
>>23475>slavesI'm sure you mean fiscally-dependent, uneducated laborers (wage-slaves)
*Tracy's irritation grows*
"So? I found the greens. What comes next? Do you want to get their attention, or should we keep moving?"
How many Tree-houses are there?
>>23471Trumpaladin and Slovenia arrive at the Trump Grill, where she sees the walls and ceilings are elegant and fancy, but not in such a way that it feels oppressive, like it's forcing you to be equally fancy. One wall looks like it's been hastily repaired though
He orders drinks... what exactly does she want? Trumpaladin gets diet coke.
>>23477>>23475I will knock some freaking sense into you when I see you
>>23479"we comeback when theres more light. me read up on how bits did things."
>>23480From the ground its impossible to determine how many are houses, but theres several dozen platforms.
>>23481"Elegant in its simplicity. I approve. I'll have a Mint Julep, thank you."
>>23482"I didn't come all the way out here for nothing. I'm heading West." (towards the city)
>>23485"tracy can you find chief orc? and take him prisoner?"
>>23486*irritated scowl intensifies*
"If I find him on my way, then sure."
Tracy continues further West, intent on investigating the city before dawn.
>>23485Tracy heads off toward the cannon-lined city. She approaches from a different side than the cannons are pointed at, and there is a large gate at the perimeter.
>>23486Thez pokes her head out of another, completely different hiding place.
"You want to capture him? Are you sure that's a good idea?
Are you sure its a 'him'?"
>>23484*Trumpaladin wonders to himself "the fuck is a Julep," but makes damn sure the waiter fulfill the order*
"Thank you... sort of like the Trebuchets. I am confident you could bring the same if you were to create the furnishings for some of our other buildings. I want to ask you, what exactly is it you wished to accomplish in your second life, your chance to do it again. You wish to be a master carpenter?"
>>23488"we need Xir as a bargining chip."
[2d20 = 27]>>23488Tracy approaches the gate in stealth.
Search and Spot checks to examine gate and sense for guards.
>When you really want to yell at another character, but you can't because your characters are miles away
>>23489https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mint_julep"I hadn't really thought of that. When I first found myself here, I never really had a chance to stop and think. I've spent all my time responding to the circumstances as they came and doing my best not to flip out. What I want,... thats an interesting question."
>>23491Light peeks out from the door, but the area is otherwise unilluminated.