No.115709[Last 50 Posts]
>Spoonfeed me. What's this thread about?
This thread typically consists of Anon gone filly, as he's thrust into a new life as a cute little pony.
>What's to be expected?
Fillies, cuteness, Anon-tier shenanigans, bitchy Twilight, desires to be the little filly, etc..
>Any archive of photos or stories?
>I'm a contributor.
Great! For writers, just write, because the guys handling the doc are ded. For artist, animators, and any other, store them in the Dropbox for future viewing pleasure.
>I don't like this thread because of reasons.
You'll never know how it is unless you try a dose of filly.
Old Anon Mare:https://mlpol.net/mlpol/res/113170.html
What the fuck even is this thread
Like do you people actually unironically want to be turned into a child cartoon pony so you can be fucked or "bred" by people from /mlpol/ or you yourself fuck an /mlpol/ user that has been turned into a little filly? Do you realize how ridiculous that is
This is by far the most degenerate general on /mlpol/ I mean it combines fucking pedophilia, transformation, beastiality and/or xenophilia and whatever other fetshes you might have and Tbh I gagged a lil bit upon discovering this thread
Please consider psychiatric help and reevaluate your life of you unironically browse this general and look at anon filly pictures
What the fuck even is this pasta
Like do you think people actually unironically want to be turned into a child cartoon pony so they can be fucked or "bred" by people from /mlp/ or they themselves fuck an /mlp/ user that has been turned into a little filly? Do you realize how ridiculous that is
This is by far the least degenerate general on /mlp/ I mean it doesn't have fucking pedophilia, transformation, beastiality and/or xenophilia and whatever other fetshes you think it has and Tbh I gagged a lil bit upon discovering this pasta
Please consider psychiatric help and reevaluate your life of you ironically browse this general and look at anon filly pictures
what happened to the other thread that was put up before?
>My image is the OP image
My day has been made>>115718
hope you get it all done, m8
Shit, forgot about that. Here's what the riddle was:
>"Clover, I've decipherized™ it! The riddle reads…" She clears her throat. "Upon a bed a male doth lie, three limbs bound with a heavy sigh. Upon the eve of every day, a genocide he orchestrates."I suck at riddles though
So he's jerking off with both hands?
We are back online?
Anon daddy looks SHARP. Literally, sharp. no wonder filly is hurting also other reasons
Oh shit that's hot.
post a new thread, didn't we already do that?
Arn't fidget spinners supposed to help treat autism or something?
Literally autism exacerbaters.
In this order:
TSCG? I've never heard of that card game, please tell me more.
Encourage Filly's autism with a Butterfly Knife
That sounds like a grand idea with no hands. What can go wrong?
The one where you and Twilight have a Duel
over who Anonfilly gets to live with, But if you lose, then you are also turned into a filly and both of you have to take part in her spell shenanigans. Which also includes some lewd spells
>>115811>lose>turned into filly
are you sure you got this the right way around?
>>115812>wanting to lose your autonomy because purple cunt doesn't want to be stuck alone with Spike
y tho? I get being the filly is fun, but why do you want Twilight to force experiments and spells on you?
I dunno about you anon, but your gonna be turned into a lot of things not just a filly, if you let twilight have her way with you 2.
What's wrong with her face?
Well, I reckon t's a lot hotter when she's calling you daddy than the other way around.
Well if you get off on calling Anon "daddy" while he fucks your fillyhood, then more power to ya.
you're six times her size, take them back!
Did you see the pic that was referenced to? >>115767
you know what? you're right, i'm being too lenient. filly's gotta be taught a lesson!
With those chips, filly is going to be punishing herself.
Filly knows how to party. Let's set up some Chick-Fil-A catering at a local college and watch the salt flow.
Put your dick in her.
i don't think that'll work
Love, uh love finds a way.
Put a condom on fag.
Unless you want an Anonbabby.
Is there no hole or something? If not, then make a hole to fuck.
Cut a hole in it fag. Take pictures.
>>115842>Defiling the filly plush
>>115844>Getting a non-lewd plush
>>115847>Ruining a plush that was clearly never intended to be lewd
Do you even filly, mate?
>>115848>Not reading my post
Do you even English, anon?
One hand, because three limbs are bound. I came up with this answer first and I want to see someone be a bit more original
Someone claim me as a filly! [ 1d100 = 3 ]
It's a fucking clock.
Sorry there's no update today, I got sidetracked with the fishing thread and further distracted by IRL stuff. I've still put in a decent amount of work, so expect the update tomorrow to come pretty early.
Hour, minute, and second hands.
>upon the eve of every day
Time is reset/killed
And since we're calling it a male in specific, it's probably a grandfather clock.
That's a stretch. Most clocks I've ever seen only have hour and minute hands, and the genocide == reset time is even stretchier.
I don't know what clocks you've been looking at, almost all the analog ones I've seen have three hands.
F-from who? I wish I got gifts…
>Most clocks I've seen
Most clocks you've seen are shit.
>genocide == reset time
It's a riddle. They are known for metaphors. In fact, you want a good metaphor for killing time? Go watch the movie "The Langoliers." It's pretty creepy.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LodnGRjWqp0
But I would have nothing to contribute. Unless someone wants to receive random shit that I make.
If you can take in a bunch of bottles and cans and hold on to the money to buy gifts and make cards, you can join in. random shit that you make is the best gift, Anon.
i think something like 97% out of the 178 participants were alright with homemade stuff
someone would absolutely love the random shit that you make
if not, minimum technically is $20, but i'd rather have something made from christmas cheer than just $20 worth of hasbro toys
i want to be molested by another filly
and why dont we have anything like that, yet? like a filly slowly moving on top of another, bedroom eyes and tongue sticking out, while the other filly is blushing, sweating, and saying, "n-no, but this is gay! i'm n-not gay!"
That means I can claim you! >:D[ 1d100 = 58 ]
>You are Anon Filly, a human that woke up one day in Equestria in the body of a filly, ten years before the return of Luna.>As it turns out, you're not the only human to get this treatment, and there are no less than 5 humans to have had this happen over the past few years.>One of these ex-humans is Twilight Sparkle, the filly whose house you've been staying in for the past few days.>Some crazy things have started happening since you arrived however.>For starters, a changeling had replaced Twilight's mother, Twilight Velvet, and tried to get close to Princess Cadance, even if it meant wiping ponies' memories when they found out too much.>But you managed to rat her out to Princess Celestia without dying, which is pretty nice, but it also means that the whole family has a hit out on their heads.>It's not all bad though. You've discovered you have a special talent in being able to see into the future, although you don't have the ability to control it just yet.>So far, you've managed to use it to find out where the real Twilight Velvet was being hidden, and after making her pancakes with Shiny, you'd say you've hit it off with her alright thus far.>But your powers have also given you a pretty wicked prophecy of the future.>The Elements of Harmony want you to bring the ex-human ponies to them, or the changelings could take over Equestria!>You are right now about to board a train with Twilight's family and Cadance to Ponyville as part of Equestria's Witness Protection Program.>In your possession are a dice bag, an Ogre's and Oubliettes rulebook, and an unopened letter from Lyra Heartstrings, a filly who used to be a talented busker living in Seattle.
You teasingly stick your tongue out at Twilight.
"So I thought you were going to be the popular one, but it looks like I'm the only one getting letters here."
She sighs heavily.
>"Just remember who introduced you to her."
"Yeah, yeah… she was pretty cool though."
You try to think back to your meeting with Lyra. She played a lot of music from Earth and it made you feel a little nostalgic. Then you tried to molest her, and instead of getting all pissed off, she was pretty cool with it and suggested making you a dildo to help relieve the tension. Unless she knows some magic to temporarily change the weight and physical dimensions of an object, you're pretty sure this letter does not contain a dildo, though you still kind of want one.
"Hey Celestia, is there a way to quickly send packages between Canterlot and Ponyville?"
<<<"Well the Equestrian post can make deliveries within a day or two. Is that fast enough?"
"I guess, but is there like, a magical method? You know, to be able to send things instantaneously?"
Naturally, Twilight takes the opportunity to give a magic lecture.
>"Anon, teleportation magic takes a lot of energy. Like a small power plant kind of energy. And it gets worse the more mass you want to send. You can barely send a letter with dragon fire, and we don't even have that because Spike's too young."
Look guy, I'm just recoloring things. I didn't invent "Anondaddy". Ya perv.
Cuddles, of course>>115823>>115830>>115835>>115851>The Adventures of Filly Plush
That actually makes sense. Good work, you might have saved the fillies from getting gassed
>>115936Two scoops of vanilla
Mint chocolate chip?
She is genetically designed to enjoy mint chocolate chip the mossy.
I wanted to write something today but I didn't get to do that though. Other stuff is taking my time from me. I have intended to write something this weekend anyway but no promises.
Also filly is so cute. I want one.
Please explain how a clock can represent twelve characters.
12 numbers on the clock face?
>>115947>Filly has good taste.
indeed, I want to taste the filly
There was some more information before the riddle, which I realize now might be hints.
>On the wall a riddle is scrawled in an ancient tongue which has twelve slots below it.>While League combs through her Ancient Language Dedecipherizer,™ you take a look at the wall opposite to you.>Two sets of the alphabet are inscribed in stone tablets.>Upon closer examination, each tablet has a specific magical rune etched into its back.>Unfortunately, the slots beneath the riddle seem to lack any distinguishable runes.>"Clover, I've decipherized™ it! The riddle reads…" She clears her throat. "Upon a bed a male doth lie, three limbs bound with a heavy sigh. Upon the eve of every day, a genocide he orchestrates."
Possibly meaning it's 12 characters long, and only 2 max of each letter?That bold did not show up at all
I love your waifu too.
but anon, you're my waifu
It's just some guy jerking it before going to sleep
But what if I wanna do things with my wiener and stuff? What happens then?
>>115982>things with my wiener and stuff
I'm gonna start a line of sex toys and call it that
I want to make the filly into sausage.
then jump into a sausage maker
Here's something that may help, I finally got around to making a pastebin for my story! https://pastebin.com/J4G5FWzM
Now, to the update I promised you all!
>your dreams are not too bad this time>they mainly consist of you (human) and Twilight hopping around different universes and seeing what's there>included are some other fictional universes that you know of>star wars/trek, pokemon, even 40K>you two stopped the Death Star from blowing up, crippled a borg cube, caught a legendary, and even fought with Space Marines against the forces of chaos>the interesting part happened when you were about to press the "EXTERMINATUS" button to clear off a planet held by chaos>you feel a tap on your shoulder>you turn around to see Princess Luna standing behind you>"Are you the creature known as Anonymous?">she's pretty short, too>are humans just complete giants to all ponies?>probably
"Yeah, and to what do I owe your visit, your majesty?">trying to be as polite as you can, you also kneel down>"Please, save the formality for my sister. I've come to ask a few questions.">okay, nothing new so far>you stand back up as she asks her first question>"Were you the one who maxed the score on the guardstaff's Pac-Mare machine three times?">you were, and you're not ashamed in the slightest
"Yes I am.">she develops a small smirk for an instant but is replaced by her calm demeanor again>"Then I would like to congratulate you on beating my score and putting those guards even further in their place. However, I regret to inform you that your scores were wiped. Too many of them were complaining about the top three scores being S U C, M A I, and A S S.">this makes you laugh yourself, you had forgotten what you put down for the initials
"Then tell them that they don't actually have to suck my ass!">this takes her completely by surprise and she's just barely able to hold in her own laughter>she regains her composure after a few seconds, but still keeps a smile on her face>"I'll tell them tomorrow, I hope you don't mind if I quote you directly.">now that the fun's over, only one question remains in your mind>maybe two>okay, maybe even three, but you're pretty sure she isn't DTF>first things first, though
"I just have to ask, how'd you figure out it was me?">"I heard that Twilight visited on Saturday and brought a guest that Celestia asked for personally. After confronting Tia about this, she told me who you are.">guess that also answers your second question>she didn't flip out about you because she knew what to expect
"Anything else you want to ask while you're here?">"Yes, is it true that your species has successfully sent members of it to the moon and back?">back to the moon, but she might as well know about it
"Yeah, back in 1969 we sent three guys there on the first of several missions. Only Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin actually got to land on it, though. Michael Collins had to stay back in the orbital craft and make sure that they had a way back.">she looks genuinely stunned for a solid minute>"You're going to need to tell me more about this later, I need to get back to work for now. Besides, it's nearly morning and you'll wake up soon."
"Then I guess I'll see you tomorrow?">"You will, you've managed to catch my attention in multiple ways, and unlike my sister, you don't need to visit me personally.">and with that, she walks away and fades out of your dream>now, where were you?>oh yes, the "EXTERMINATUS" button!>you pull your arm back dramatically and shoot it forward to press that big, shiny red button that will end all those cultists' lives>as you push the button, you get a piercing ringing instead of the fire and brimstone you expected>that must be your phone alarm>you open your eyes with great disappointment at not being able to massacre chaos followers from orbit before waking up>you shut off your alarm and roll out of bed, looking about as good as you feel judging by your reflection in the walls>time to go find a bathroom so you can at least clean yourself up>you grab your phone and wander out into the hallway to look for one>still dark, this isn't going to be very fun>you wander for a few minutes going door to door, and you find a bathroom>yep, all the necessary equipment is necessary>a shower, a toilet, and a sink>time to clean up>setting your phone down next to the sink, you turn on the shower to what you think is a reasonable temperature>you check to make sure all the other necessary stuff is present while it's warming up>yep, there's soap and shampoo>there's a towel already on the rack>you don't need clothes because you're a pony>yep, you're good to go>now the water just needs to get warm>you take a seat on the toilet and wait>you're not risking using your phone here, it's a lot easier to drop it without fingers and you don't want to fish it out if you do>when you see the shower producing a significant amount of steam, you decide to test the water>it's pretty spot on, temperature wise>you get in and just stand for a few moments before actually cleaning yourself>it takes some brainpower and effort, but you manage to get just about everything>now to let the shower thoughts take you!>it's pretty interesting to see where your mind takes you>it drifts back to the Pac-Man machine>after some contemplation, you come to the conclusion that Pac-Man may have been the first undead survival game, depending on the formal definition of that genre>that's enough shower time, the water's starting to get a bit colder>you step out and turn the water off>after grabbing the towel, you dry off as best you can and pick your phone back up to leave>you should probably find Spike, he might know where everything is>but first you have to find your way to somewhere you can start looking
>might as well try to get back to the kitchen>as you work your way along, eventually you're greeted by a pleasant smell that makes it much easer to find out where it is>mere moments later, you find Spike in the kitchen working with a frying pan>he's also got that gay little apron on
"Can I ask what's in the pan?">he visibly jumps at this and turns around>"Hi Anon, I didn't expect you to be awake yet. I was just making myself breakfast, want some?">you are pretty hungry
"Sure, what are you making?">"I'm trying to make pancakes, and it's going pretty well so far.">he tries to flip one using only the pan>he barely catches it>"Do you want one or two?">you've never really been that big of a fan of pancakes, but you're being offered food>at any rate, you'll just have one since they look pretty big
"Just one, do you know where the syrup is?">he looks back to the pan before looking back to you>"I think it's in the cabinet to your left.">sure enough, the syrup's in that cabinet>problem is, it's up too high for you to reach>you look around for a solution, but there are no stools and the chairs look pretty heavy>however, there's some room on the shelves leading up and the cabinet's firmly stuck to the wall>you look at Spike, he's still paying attention to the pancakes>you put a hoof up on the lowest shelf to test it>it holds firmly, this crystal stuff must be pretty strong>using this as leverage, you put your other hoof up on the next highest shelf>this one holds too>after a bit more trial, you soon manage to climb up the shelves and get to the level with the syrup>success>after grabbing the syrup, you begin making your way back down at a slower pace>you really don't want to fall and drop all this sticky stuff on you in the process>"While I'm impressed with your idea, you could've asked me where a stool was.">you look over your shoulder to see spike staring up at you, looking mildly amused>you finish making your way down and use this time to construct a reply>you put down the syrup bottle, and speak your mind now that your mouth is clear
"It worked, didn't it?">"Heh, it did. Yours is on the table, and I'm pretty sure you know where all your school supplies are?"
"Yeah, they're probably back in my room. Hope I didn't have any homework, I don't really know how Cheerilee deals with that.">Spike shrugs and goes back to the pan, now holding more batter>"I'm pretty sure it'll be fine, just check if you have it or not next time.">you go take your place at the table with the syrup in tow and eat your pancake>it's actually one of the best pancakes you've ever had
"Damn Spike, this is good!">"Glad you like it, I messed up the recipe a bit. I might have to write that down for the future.">after you finish, you check the time>it's only 6:45>you're doing alright>you wander back up to your room to grab your stuff and make it there in record time>you're getting better at this for sure>your saddlebag is a bit easier to put on this time, since it's still fastened from when Twilight put it on you>after another wander around the castle, you make it back to the kitchen>Spike's now sitting at the table with his own pancake
"See ya later!">he swallows a bite that he took>"Have fun, and say hi to Sweetie Belle for me!">you'd rather not, but it's not exactly that hard to do>you pick your phone up off the table and put it in your bag, then head down to the front door>it takes longer than getting to your room, but you still make it in a few minutes>stepping out to a beautiful morning, you make your way to school
Looks like Silver may be kill, though…
Another F for a promising greentext killed too soon.Come back and prove me wrong, y-you feget!
That's a big poner.
Lie down and take it like the filly I am.
oy vey! Am i being detained?
She can't >rape
me if I want it!
Leave us Fillies alone!.
But if I was forced to be a filly, I would want to be Big Mac's cock sleeve.
If anything you should pick one of the Renault sisters if you really want to be a cocksleeve so much
At least they re mares(stallion)
That's even gayer.
They're Geldings. They don't have balls. They won't be able to cum inside you.
>>116041>>116049>Not being 100% pure, rejecting cock entirely and being a horn warmer instead
Heating Celestia horn in the cold could be fairly prestigious job i bet
These aren't traps, you faggot filly.
How did this meme start?
"Do not edit or post my art on derpibooru" artist on mlpg did a gay art.
If it makes you feel any better i only use that as a reason to meme, not literally
I think its fun enough that those three random mares got picked out of the blue too
Also filly catching the Renault sisters doing 4-hoof drifting tandems when?
>>116061>i only use that as a reason to meme, not literally
and i guarantee you that's how this retarded shit spread in the first place
that's how ALL retarded shit is spread
my filly posting is extremely serious you faggot
my love is very literal
THIS CANCEROUS MEME RIGHT NOW!
Being this fanny blasted only fuels this great meme
why does she have a small goatee
Looks like you semi-successfully derailed the thread
I hope you're proud of yourself, faggot
I'm with this anon.
This stupid thing pisses me off. Degeneracy metastasizing.
Why are you quoting >>116078
That post is just laughing at the botched formatting of the initial post made by >>116073
but I do not have any hooves or cute fluff?
The 4chan thread from which this thread spun off, the one about becoming the little pony.
A shill, ignore him.>>116095>but I do not have any hooves or cute fluff?
Not yet you don't
yes, but you already is filly in spirit just by being here.
didn't work the second time though. WE HAVE LEARNED. WE HAVE EVOLVED.
Sadly i was not, i was just having fun with that gay concept
Also the horn warmer filly that was brought up is better tbh
this PTFG has odd images and writings taken away from this place, I do not think I like it very much>>116098>>116099>>116100
great so I will wait until I am cute filly
Well you have terrible taste.
I d have no plush because im a poorfag,
but a Surprise(White pegasus ponk with gold mane) plushie would be nice
>>116106>I do not think I like it very much
you is smart.
Sleep tight, poner.
Sleep tight, poner
stop shit posting you faggot>>116106
Amazing, you can stay
Sleep tight, poner.
Rest well, and take acetaminophen as needed.
your derail attempt has not gathered any attention, please just stop cluttering the thread. it is only really mildly annoying.
This thread is nothing but shitposting.(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)
Sleep tight, poner.
>>116110SLEEP TIGHT, PONER
And sleep tight anon.I think the fillies are going to get gassed. Riddle too hard
SLEEP TIGHT, PONER
>>116110SLEEP TIGHT, PONER>>116103
Asriel Plushie, then you could tell all the ponies that monsters are real on your world.>>116017
F, it was just taking a surprising turnThe Gendarme must have caught up with Silver for that one picture he found on Derpibooru
SLEEP TIGHT, PONER.
sleep tight, poner.
That's a cute filly
that is a very cute filly, but that is not me, I wish to be cute if I wait longer?
One day you will be cute filly. Give it time.
Well I like this.
A hitler plushy.
All the other ponies would wonder what kind of creature it was. But I would know. I’d remember him, forever.
Sleep tight poner.
A Twilight plush. It could be multi purpose, like making a voodoo doll of the real thing.
sorry I haven't gotten to this, I'm not planning on letting this die until I finish it once and for all. You faggets matter too much to me to let you all down.
No problem!I need more friends IRL
I'd take my Luna plushie. I already treat it as an actual companion, and maybe some of Twilight's wizard magic could bring it to life.
No, love your momfu
Nah, fuck that. Every other universe has Twi ranging from being a major cunt to a monstrous asshole. I'll defend myself with what I can, including voodoo.
I'm alone, broke, it's Friday night, and I feel like I can't even masturbate anymore. wwfd?
get drunk and fantasize about shitposting is my guess.
save up for booze or something to get your rocks off
What if filly is tired of cheap booze and stuck living at school?
then don't get the cheap booze
tbh if i was a filly in your situation i'd be taking pictures of my puss and posting them
but would that be okay under Canadian Law?
does canadian law cover colorful horse puss?
i think not
Take the tune to look for a job. That should fix your broke problem.
FILLY, ANON, FILLY
no, but it covers regular horsepuss, I'm pretty sure. Also, there's the whole issue of whether being a filly means technical underageban, so it's a pretty complex issue.
fucking leaves, amirite?
"Hey, hey… Twi? I'm not a unicorn. I don't know jack about magic."
>"Riiiigggghht… which is why I was explaining it to you."
"Well you don't have to be rude about it."
>"I thought I wasn't… sorry."
Damn right she better be sorry. Fucking smart ass university graduate thinks she can talk down to you. You weren't really that offended, but you felt nonetheless like you needed to put Purple in her place.
You turn your attention to Celestia. She's wearing an opaque prismatic dress with a color gradient that goes from turquoise to seafoam green, which covers her wings and cutie mark entirely. To top it off, she has a straw sun hat that covers her horn. A less than clever pony might mistake her for a relatively tall Earth pony mare. And even still, she looks damn sexy in it.
"You know, princess, that outfit of yours looks absolutely stunning. If I had any bits on me, I'd have to take you out someplace nice, maybe have a cup of tea and some conversation."
This causes her to giggle just a little.
<<<"That's a lovely invitation, but I'm afraid I'm going to be a bit busy these next few months. Maybe when you get back you can tell me about your experiences in Ponyville."
You're pretty sure this won't go anywhere sexual, but you technically weren't denied an audience with the princess. Or she could just push the date off forever and say she's busy all the damn time. Whatever works.
The train is about to leave soon, so you board it quickly along with Twilight and family, quickly finding a seat in the rather spacious passenger cars. By the looks of things, it will take a few hours to reach Ponyville.
What will you do to pass the time?
No, yes u.
ask twi about the other magic stuff she knows
the resulting hours of lecture will force your mind to shut off and the time will go quickly[ 1d100 = 62 ]
plan out your future date with Celestia in your head[ 1d100 = 52 ]
>>116177>fully tried to operate cellphone camera to make lewds>fails adorably
I’d watch that.
Is duop-quob here?
Explore the train, especially important areas little fillies shouldn’t be allowed to wonder unescorted. [ 1d100 = 25 ]
Do I have to sic Reuben on you, you filthy commie?
Sleep tight poner.
Starlight is not a commie after being reformed, and she is not a commie in my story, since she hasn't mentally gone off the deep end yet (though she is growing up very lonely, as I'm pretty sure by this time, Sunburst has left). I see no problem with filly snuggling up to her.If you do not believe a commie can be reformed, let me tell you a story. When I was in high school I considered myself a socialist because I grew up poor, and around a lot of other poor people, and I thought that if done right, it could legitimately help people. Then I went to college, and as part of my mandatory "general university requirements" classes, I ended up taking a liberal arts class and a macroeconomics class in the same quarter. The liberal arts class taught Marx, and as I read his manifesto, I found it contradicted basic logic, and what I had been learning in the macroeconomics class. I now consider myself a conservative libertarian after lots of reading and contemplation about the world.
How do you feel about roads?
I say bad things about the communist because I don't like the communist.
Roads? Where we're going we dont need.. Roads.
I was referring to the fact that you had Twilight kill off a commie in your story.
Or at least she attempted to. In case you hadn't read the latest updates, Fizzlepop is alive and well, albeit with a broken horn.Twilight has very specific backstory reasons to hate communists.
>>116212>In case you hadn't read the latest updates
Im drunk. Don't mind me.
And the backstory doesn't change the fact that it ws just a joke.
The joke is that, if everything were privately owned, who would maintain the roads? The businesses sure as fuck wouldn't fix them out of pocket.
Public roads need government funds, which normally need taxes.
Anarchists and Libertarians hate taxes and anything they're used for.
Ergo, Anarchists and Libertarians hate roads.
I misread kites as kikes in the thumbnail. Half disappointed.
Roads are a military necessity and should be maintained by the state.
Consider the following: the Linux operating system is free. No one needs to pay a dime for it, and they can benefit from it as a free rider. And yet the Linux Foundation receives tens of millions of dollars from a myriad of tech companies to maintain the development of the OS. And Linus Torvalds, who's still making it his full time job to be the final arbiter over what goes into and out of that kernel somehow has a net worth of $150 million.
If the tech industry can figure out a way to make sure that a free product that is powering the computer I'm typing this post on, the server that's sending it to you, and probably about half the routers along the way, I'm pretty sure the plethora of companies that need someone to be able to drive to their business can figure out a way to pay for the maintenance of the public roads in a way that is mutually beneficial to everyone who pays for it.>>116218
In theory, most state expenditures could be justified as military necessities. Recall that the military is composed of people. If the public is unhealthy, you do not have an ideal pool to pick soldiers from. Therefore, you could justify public healthcare if you really wanted to. An ideal argument to make is that the state is incredibly inefficient at spending money, and that any time a private solution surfaces that can do things better, we should prefer that private solution.
Why do we not have a pic of Twilight and Starlight hugging Anonfilly from both sides?
The specific problem with privatising roads is that private interests will expect a return on their investment. Say I lived in the middle of nowhere, private interests would simply claim that it's not in the company's best interests to construct and maintain up to two dozen kilometers of road from my home in the middle of nowhere to, say, the nearest town, as they get nothing out of that investment.
Government is inefficient, but it is required to maintain the state and its public services for as many of its citizens as possible regardless of potential profit. Ancap assumes everyone will want to provide what's needed for everyone else, just as communism assumes all humans will want to behave like ants to maintain the community.
If your home is in the middle of nowhere, the government probably isn't maintaining the road to it that much…
Read horse magic book and mumble about growing plants. [ 1d100 = 25 ]>>116228
I did once, and no they didn't, but once every couple of years they'd come through with graders and at least maintain the roads in a usable state. Complete privatisation would mean they could ignore it entirely due to the balance of cost versus profit.
Also, ancap was tried in some country somewhere once, I think, I seem to remember someone saying that a guy just hired a PMC, promised them loot and instituted a ruthless dictatorship anyway. I have no faith in any of the anarchy systems.Filly should want to live under fascist dictatorship with a benevolent leader anyway.
Do this and ask if Twilight wants to come along instead of reading books. If you get caught you can just explain you're looking for the little fillies' room.[ 1d100 = 85 ]>>116202
What happens when Anonfilly walks in on them having
a family friendly cuddle?
Prove it. I won't claim to be an expert on microstates, but I'm pretty sure I would have heard of it. Also, Hans-Hermann Hoppe demonstrated in "A Theory of Socialism and Capitalism" that, at least in a nation with sufficient people, business owners wouldn't subsidize an outlaw security firm as they rely on security and the trust of their own clients.
Also, I doubt that there are fewer than a few hundred people on that stretch and you're just clamoring to be a free-rider anywhere. If you had to I'm sure you could establish a group fund with your community to maintain that oh-so-important artery.
I can't prove it, hence the uncertainty, but you can't deny that such a thing would be possible. That is to say, take control of society because privatisation is unregulated. Why would you need to rely on the trust of your clients when you can pay armed goons to get you what you want by force?
Generally, I believe the end-state of all anarcho capitalism is corporatocracy, which is just governance again anyway. If there's no regulations, there's nothing stopping a corporate body from becoming a monopoly and imposing regulations on people simply because they supply all the products. You can see it happening today with corporations snapping up and knocking out small business even within the regulations they have.
>Establish a group fund with your community
If you're paying armed goons to enforce your rule it is no different from a State, which employs a standing army for its own existence.
If the social character of the nation is against a unified State, there would be no little resistance against such a group. Other private security groups and militias would spring up to defend their and customers' property.
Also, monopoly is not a threat in a totally free economy. Regulations are merely barriers to competitors from outperforming larger existing firms.
>Not understanding the distinction between voluntary and involuntary relations
Read more books. Churches are communist in your view, then.
>>116236>If you're paying armed goons to enforce your rule it is no different from a State, which employs a standing army for its own existence.
That's my point, there would be nothing stopping anyone from just doing it. Yeah, there may be militias, but there's no guarantee they'd be able to fix things, imagining that they will 100% of the time because 100% of the people are 100% against the idea is wishful thinking at best. It betrays a lack of forward thinking and planning for the absolute worst case scenario. A good system doesn't fly by the seat of its pants and hope everything turns out alright, and that's what I dislike about anarchists.
>Monopoly is not a threat
Just because a society is totally free doesn't mean companies would stop acting like amoral entities and start acting like human beings. As mentioned, 100% doesn't work on human beings with any ideology, heaps of people thought democracy was a great idea and incorrigible, and look how that's working out. But enough of all this, thread's derailing.
>Churches are communist
On a very basic level, yes. Don't confuse state run communism with ideological communism, that's how the communists get you. Tiny baby steps, bit by bit, "Oooh, look! Communism isn't bad in small doses!" then before you know it they hit you with a Stalin clone, "Everyone's doing it, you want to be cool, don't you?".
>>116237>but enough of all this, thread's derailing
different anon here, but it certainly looks like it is
Let's get back to posting about filly please; I'm sure there's some other thread on this site that you guys could continue your discussion on
but I'm not 100% certain because I'm too lazy to go check the catalog myself
TBF communism in small doses is the foundation for any good society/culture.
The family unit is inherently communistic, but also the backbone of civilization.
But let's get back to fillies.
Yea. I'm too pissed off to be feelsy about it right now, but I definately share the sentiment.>>116244
France, you're freakin' me out, man.
>>116243>family inherently communistic
Wrong. Communism seeks the eradication of hierarchy, to bring everyone to the same level. The traditional family is anything but that, as there is a clear structured hierarchy. The father is the head of the family, for instance, and older members typically have greater authority.
Speaking of which, if Twilight were to find and marry a father for Anonfilly, whom would it be? Single-parent households are unhealthy.
That is great Anon
One can say…. WOW!
>You woke up in a puddle of wet mud. Blinking, you looked around only to see that you were in a clearing in a forest. You were in a mud puddle that stretched to a nearby large pond. The sun blazed down you. You could feel beads of sweat roll down on your forehead.
Where am I? you thought to yourself. (The thoughts should be in italics here. Just so you know if I fail.)
>You brought up your hand, at least that was your intention, to wipe away the drops of sweat that had assembled on your forehead. Instead of a hand, however, your eyes saw a green hoof.
>With a jolt of horror, you jumped up into the air. You looked over your body in a furious pace. You noticed that instead of hands you had hooves and the same case for your legs. Instead of skin, you had green fur. The hairs that made your fur were so many that they became like a thick layer and it felt like you had a permanent set of clothes on you. Your fur's hairs were short though. The only exception to this was the fur on your chest, which was long and fluffy. Your tail was completely pitch black. It seemed simple enough, straight and black. You mane was more interesting since its fringe went off your head down on the right side of your head. It hanged from your head. You checked you flank and sure enough, you had a mark on it. It was a question mark.
>You were a pony from my little pony. The show that bronies- I'm sorry if I offended anyone. Ehm, horsefuckers watched. You yourself had not spent much time on the mlp board but you recognized the pony look.
>How could this be? And where were you? The last thing that you remembered was that you were binge shitposting. Had you fallen asleep? You had done it before at your desk so it wouldn't be too surprising but how did you get transported here?
>You tried to look for something significant with this place but you didn't find anything. You had imagined that there would be some kind of portal next to you, which led back to your world but there wasn't any. Where you still in your world? Was this a dream?
>You whacked yourself with your hoof. Since, apparently, your hoof was soft as a taut pillow, it didn't hurt. You only got mud on your face due to the fact that you stood in mud. You hit yourself in the face, hard. That work and you finally felt pain so this wasn't a dream by theorem fourteen eighty-eight of lucid dreaming.
>The view was grand though. Infront of you were a great pond. Behind it, there were tall fir trees and behind them, there stuck up a snow-covered mountain range. You followed this mountain range with your eyes only to end up spinning in a circle. At some directions the stood higher above you than others. You realized that due to them being so much higher up than you that you were in a valley.
>Other types of trees were present, not just conifer trees. You saw a few trees with leafs on their branches. Both leafs and spruce pines were in a strong green color. A faint breeze swept by you. It helped you cool off, which you needed. This day was hot.
>However, the scenery did not help your current mood. What was going on?
>You realized that you had been so stunned until now that you had forgotten to panic. Luckily for you, you just remembered that. You began to hyperventilate and trembled greatly. You grinned your teeth and felt how you were about to womit but you managed to keep it in.
Then you slapped yourself for the third time of the day. Dr. Smulesteinberg might have to ask you if you have any pent up sexual frustration.
"Everything is going to be okay," you told yourself. "I will be fine I just need to figure out how I got here. Then I can get back the same way."
>You ignored the voice that in your mind that said that it would be easier said than done and put your mind on a task.
>The mud in your fur on your hooves and in your face had dried up by now. You could feel that your stomach nipping at you. You had to find some food soon. You were getting hungry.
>You couldn't find any food nearby but in a hot day like this, it probably was a good idea to stay hydrated. You walked up the pond and began to drink its water. You had dipped your chin into the surface so that water entered your mouth. You caught water with your tongue. Its motion made ripples in the water.
>When you were done and the ripples had evened out, you noticed how clear the water was in the pond. You noticed it especially in your shadow that fell over the water since you had the sun in your back. The water was transparent or should have been if the sun didn't cause it to be reflective.
>As you inspected the bottom of the pond through the water, You saw that it got a lot deeper further along its edge. You walked along the edge of the pond, on its red-rock beach, to the deeper area. There you stood as close as possible to the edge without falling in to optimize your shadow's reach over the surface. You looked down into the depth. It was way deeper here but not enough deep for you not to be able to see the bottom.
>There was something weird on the bottom though. It looked like a big tree. It was brown in its color with hues of green mixed in so it wasn't your typical brown bark. Another odd feature it had was that when its five branches broke off with the main stock they seemed to be equally long and similar in shape. They also had no smaller branches of their own and the only few branches it had were big as logs themselves.
>The water became a bit murkier in the deeper area. You figured that even if the concentration of particles in the water was low, a pillar of it would make it harder to see through. This made you unsure of what you were seeing since the image of the tree was a bit blurry.
Story name: Rule the Everfree
I was working on my fugtive story line when I realised that many of things that happend would fit better in another context so I had put that story on hold for, most likely, ever. I will sort of replace it with this story.
I appreciate critism. This might turn into a bit of an CYOA at some points. It will become obvious when that is the case.
If we are going to be super autistic then it means that it must be a unicorn. To keep the bloodline of cartoon horse pure! Therefore I think the best candidate is Sunburst They can orginize books togather or something.
Then Anonfilly has only scholars (or whatever we would call them) in her home, with the exception of spike. Or maybe Anonfilly could need someone that is not into the academics? Someone who could teach her craftmanship to contrast TWilight.
Honestly, I don't actually care what work her father would do so long he is kind and cares for her. That is the important part according to me. And he has a good moral compass.
(Imagine a included pic with the text, "Your moral compass is a fucking roulette wheel!" meme here)
This is a bit awkward to read.
yup, filly is ded
A bit awkward as has been said, but it's not often we get decent imagery in a filly story. Keep up the good work!
I dont care about the rules saying that i should only claim one filly, i m claiming you three as a [ 1d100 = 78 ]
No filly shall escape my [ 1d100 = 45 ]
And a second pic to see what kind of pile we re making without having to go back to the other thread
rolling to see what kind of filly I am [ 1d100 = 66 ]
fuck it, let's try this again. Will I still be able to do cool magic?[ 1d100 = 60 ]
nah, I get to fly this time.
Communism is acceptable only where it exists as a voluntary association within the context of a greater voluntary society. Communists love the idea of by, for, and of the people. Perhaps they might like credit unions, where the customer is also partial owner of the institution, and can make votes on policy, and on who gets to be the manager, if they bother to show up to the meetings (most don't). And no matter what, they benefit from the fact that all of the credit union's profits are used to help the customer. Of course, a credit union would do terribly without a capitalist society around it that allows it to voluntarily associate with, or disassociate with, whomever it chooses.
C-can i reroll my filly? I REALLY dont want to be a bonehead, they are the less cuddly of them all
i choose you because >>116286
is probably the faggy wizard filly[ 1d100 = 70 ][ 1d100 = 57 ]
you could just put something soft around your horn such as another filly's mouth
so that it doesn't get in the way
you are correct, and this time I'll be ditching you all to fly around.
Rolling to be a filly. None of you better try anything gay.[ 1d100 = 13 ]
Alright, rolling for fillification.[ 1d100 = 76 ]
do you think flying is gay?
>>116295>Implying i wouldnt hold you in my magic and add you to my pile if i ever saw you running free
I guess being a bonehead has its perks
Let's see what I get to do with you two>>116297>>116299[ 1d100 = 87 ]
>>116301>implying I wouldn't leave as soon as you let go
nobody contains me!
hate to tell you m8, but it's pretty gay.
I wanna be a filly[ 1d100 = 30 ]
You wanna bet? Also i m pretty sure the other faggots on the pile would also hold ya down
There s no better cuddle than struggle snuggle, so please do improve our experience
you underestimate my ability to be a stubborn bastard.
You underestimate every filly autism until they finally get what they want
Do what you must, you re still getting >Haped
then I hope you enjoy biting
You open the book to the first page and realize right away that this is some pretty boring stuff. Being a college dropout, you never found reading a bunch of theory to be very fun, even if it's dumbed down to a level for fillies to understand. Well… fillies that are smarter than the average filly, but still fillies, that is. After only a few minutes, you close the book again. It's time to find something better to do.
Since you're going to be on this train for several hours, you figure you might as well explore the dang place. You walk up to Purple and whisper into her ear.
"Hey Twi, wanna explore the train? Reading's a bit boring. Maybe we could go bug the conductor or something."
She sighs and leads you towards the front of the car, bringing you to a door with a window at the top. Before you can move to open the door, she lifts you up so you can see out the window. Outside, you can see that there's a bit of a gap between passenger cars.
>"Look, we're not on one of those luxury accordion trains where you can easily just run between the cars all willy nilly. If you want to go explore around and risk falling off when the train takes a sharp turn around the mountain, be my guest. Personally, I'm staying right here."
call her a wuss and do it anyway[ 1d100 = 47 ]
Feist filly huh?
You cant bite if you re being cuddled from the back with your head held high
>Tmw you notice you have no smug filly pics
then I'll kick and scream until I hit something soft and importantI know that feel, bro
>>116318>Not flying high with the unicorn filly stuck to your back
Aww, i was hoping some free filly-copter rides while cuddling, maybe some other time
And kick all you want, at that point i ve already won
well, I'm willing to fly someone around as long as they're a good passenger. Filly Attack helicopter, then?
I guess we could, wonder if we should rain pasta from the sky or good ol pies on the unsuspecting ponies below
whatever works best, or we could even go out and rain death upon our enemies! Fuck it, I'm gonna claim you so we can do this![ 1d100 = 76 ]
that is just evil
out of all the pics in my folder, and the compelling need i have to save every filly i see…
i think i can live without this one.
>>116320>free filly-copter rides
I like thisI'm gonna try drawing it tonight, wish me luck[/sH
I've seen some shit Anon, but this post made me pause and question what I'm doing with my life more than any other.
>>116325>Hoof-holding and stuff
I would literally leave this filly to shit on itself, or maybe even do some babby abuse like some other green back on mulp
Rub fillies nose in it, just like with a dog. See if they try that bs again.
Then you don't have a job anymore.
Have fun making $7.50/hr. scrubbing toilets anyway, but living in a crappy shack with no amenities.
That violates my NAP
Have fun telling twilight anything and showing her you’re a human from another dimension. I’m sure she’ll be as tender and wonderful to you as all the other psychopathic purplehorses in these stories.
Or maybe quit being a douchebag you little bitch, and let’s try to make it through the day without any further unpleasantness.
Figured it'd be a good time to repost this, you feget.
Now, let's see what I get to do with this unicorn…[ 1d100 = 59 ][ 1d100 = 96 ]
Hmm… how does an unwilling flight high up into the mountains for a sexual weekend getaway sound? >Implying you have a choice
Whatever, I outsmarted an infant and I’m proud of that.
You open up the door. The loud sounds of the train running along the tracks seem to echo throughout the car, and just a foot or two away from you is another door, closed. Quickly, you jump towards it, latching onto the door handle.
Okay, now this shit's scary. But you're no chicken. You've already jumped this far, might as well go all the way. You sidle over towards the edge of the door as you hold onto the handle and kick the side of the train to force the door open. Before it can swing too far, you jump again, landing safely in the other car.
"Where's your sense of adventure, Twi?
She simply shakes her head, and begins to head back to her seat. Before she sits down, however, Cadance catches notice of you, and runs over to the edge of the car.
<"Anon, what the heck are you doing? Get back here you crazy little filly!"
Run into the cab you just opened, see if Cadence is mare enough to follow [ 1d100 = 48 ]
I'd just hold a mirror up to him and make him feel like an idiot for even trying this shit
What does it look like we're doing? Also, you'll have to catch me first.[ 1d100 = 88 ]>>116372
Fuck it, I'm feeling creative and I like this idea>"Better hope it doesn't stain faget."
"heh… Hahah…">babby statrs to look confused
"Hahahaha! HAAHAHAAHHHAHA!">as your laughing grows louder, it starts to get angry>"What's so funny!?"
"Dude, you're a mental adult and you SHIT YOURSELF!">as you fall over laughing, babby gets embarrassed and goes full damage control>"W-well, you're still a faggot!"
"AT LEAST I DIDN'T SHIT MYSELF">you continue to sit and laugh at the pathetic loser in front of you until Twilight gets back>"What happened!?"
"This guy shit himself trying to get me fired!">she gets angry and turns to babby>"What did I tell you about trying to manipulate ponies? Go clean this up and go to your room!">as babby gets to cleaning, Twilight pulls out a sack of bits>"Sorry about the trouble, she isn't usually this rude. I hope this doesn't stop you from coming back if I ever need a sitter.">it really doesn't>you're actually more likely to, now that you can laugh at this idiot>you accept the bits and leave, no fucks given
Fuck, wrong reply.
Thanks m8, always happy to provide enjoyment.
Anon knows no shame tho.
At this point, why do you even give a shit
Congratulations, you caught me! Can you do it again?[ 1d100 = 71 ]
forgot to add that the goal this time is just to escape her, no exploring
Where the fuck did candyass come from I thought we only brought twilight on this misadventure…
At any rate, time to put our new body to the test, use superior earth-filly strength to catapult over her into the next car![ 1d100 = 90 ]
>I thought we only brought twilight on this misadventure
The entire family plus Cadance is going to Ponyville.
Was getting caught part of your plan?
It wasn't, but there's always room for a plan to change!
Shut the door quickly and retreat. Hide under some seats. [ 1d100 = 51 ]
this, let's juke her out![ 1d100 = 68 ]
Roll 1d20 to see how this turns out. I don't think anyone's beating a 90.
what happens if anon never rolls?
Then I'll roll
nice job, you killed the filly
Considering Elway declared me filly, does this mean I just committed suicide?
Rolling. [ 1d20 = 12 ]
I didn't have the original
Too late Anon, filly is already kill >>116404
Sheit. I should check back more often than every hour or so.
Dubs confirm. Purple must revive Filly.
The CYOA would be over I think if filly was legit kill
If filly dies, we'll just have to pick back up at the last save point.
Fuck. We're remembering to save, right?
rollan to save filly[ 1d20 = 10 ]
I'm sure it auto-saved when we got on the train.>>116430>this time around the train ride is very quiet
>>116404>>116416>>116432>Not making a filly roll
That s why you guys cant into dice, watch[ 1d20 = 8 ]
But ince it had already been rolled then rollin for Cadance reflex, to save the filly from falling off or something with that 3[ 1d20 = 8 ]
>>116434>2 rolls>2 eights
Testing to see if the "rand()" only triggers once when inside a post or if that s legit[ 1d20 = 6 ][ 1d20 = 7 ]
We saw multiple D100 rolls in the last thread with different rolls so it will be legit. Nice dubs I guess.
Nope, just my luck, fug
A-at least that s enough to get back with only a concussion from hitting our head on Cadance's head right?
Or at least hitting our head on the side of the door and getting magically lifted before we fall into the ground…right?
Should we roll for the train, to see if the combined 16 from the Filly roll and Cadance roll can beat the train's roll? I would, but I'm too much of a newfag.
rolling for train! watch this be a nat 20 or something[ 1d20 = 3 ]
rolling to not do any dumb shit[ 1d100 = 53 ]
I think the train should be a fixed value, not a roll, since its not alive, which is up to Reuben
Thank fuck, the train is slow.
If it's a fixed value, then we need to reroll for Filly and Cadance.
Rolling for the train tracks. Let's see if this ride can't get a little interesting.[ 1d20 = 2 ]
rolling for the mountain to finish it off![ 1d20 = 6 ]
This is a really
On a slight incline with plenty of room. I think Filly is safe.
Uh, I really dont get your logic anon…>>116449
Should we roll for the wind?
Fuck it, rolling to see if its too windy or even if pegasi are making some kind of tornado close by[ 1d20 = 2 ]
light breeze, that's about it then
If we set the train to a fixed value after we rolled for Filly and Cadance, then we could just set the train's value lower than Filly and Cadance's rolls. It wouldn't exactly make sense.
>>116442>>116449>>116450>>116454>Those ultrageously absurdly inacreditable low rolls
Thankfully its for the enemy, but dont come near me and my O&O group ever again
Its not us who s setting it but Reuben, it d be rigged otherwise yea
>>116378>Babies can clean up after themselves and go to their rooms by themselves
Good shit though, pls write more.
but I already am writing
Do what I did anon, find an add for autistic children who want to play dnd but don’t have any friends.
I was the most mentally stable one in the group and it lasted or years.
I do really fucking love flowcharts…
break out the flowcharts, I want to see some shit!
I wouldn’t mind running a dnd game for you faggots, but I can’t do it tonight. If there’s still interest tomorrow I’ll make a thread.
YES, i gonna get so destroyed it will get into a online compilation
Let's see what this looks like… [ 1d20 = 8 ]>>116468
Well I base things on a sort of watered down Pathfinder when I really need rules for shit.
what did you do to that plush!?
What do all the 8s mean!?
8… I suppose I could work with that if I factor in her CMB.
Someone managed to roll a 13 and an 88 in this thread, actually.>>116477
Looks like makeshift chain armor.>>116481
Always thought Luna would be into chainmail type of armour, so why not craft her one
it's FOURTEEN, you weenie
because that looks very immobile and like it wouldn't be able to stop a penknife
Out of Mountain Dew pop tops?
I know, weenie. Just the fact that they were that close to the fabled number.
Chainmail is designed to protect against slashing weapons, not stabby ones.
"FUCK!"[ 1d100 = 21 ]
“Oh yeah? Whatcha gonna do, tie me up for the whole trip?”[ 1d100 = 23 ]
Quick! Hug that pink lovehorse while we have the chance. [ 1d100 = 19 ]
boosting this [ 1d100 = 72 ]
Its been a long time ago so dont really remember but it sure wasnt mountain dew tho, since they aint as big here, never even seen a dew can irl tbh>>116489
Become aware of all the low rolls you got and how badly that could ve ended for you thanks to the CM power, then start shaking on Candy arm/legs[ 1d100 = 80 ]
Probably shouldn’t boost anons with the same flag as you, might look like samefagging.
then who's he gonna boost, the other fourteen americans here?
seconding this [ 1d100 = 13 ]
Stupid fucking Brazil being reasonable and comprehending the existential horrors of narrowly avoiding death…
Ids back when? ^:)
Pretty hard since 80% of the thread is US. I could tether to my phone and get my UK flag (roaming gives you your home country IP/location) rather than the hotel wifi if that even makes a difference?
Stop talking to ourself we’re shitting up the thread…
Thanks for posting that, me
man, I sure am being agreeable today…
This is just like all those times I had conversations with myself on 4chan
*all those times I had conversations with ourself
yeah, aren't there only like, 2 US posters there now?
no, it's myself
What am I talking about? I already know it's just me
Jesus Hitler Christ you guys…
ha, I didn't get the formatting right so we deleted it and posted it again
we're such a loser
but I should remember, there are too many boards for one american to samefag all at once! I had to hire a couple others to help out.
I do it for free faggot.
fuck you, me, I can make all these posts!
No I don't, because I don't exist
Can i change this >>116495
Make so the filly banters with >>116492
then, as Cadance starts answering, then tune out of it and feel the weight and stuff of the bad rolls like >>116495
Rerolling because iunno if it should be able to just change like that [ 1d100 = 49 ]
Also lets break this combo of freedom posting
why would I report one of my own threads?
>be the filly
>telepoted to equestria
>expect to frolic with all the other ponies formt he show
>instead spwn in the middle of pony ville
>surrounded by other anon fillies.
>they all have wierd flags floating above their fucking heads.
>two amerians start arguing about being the same person
>the other americans get into it too
>start accusing eachother of being themselves an sheit
>bein filly is suffering.
fuck you for ruining my streak!
It's too late for that
Don't I remember that I've already called over the filly police?
Now look at what I've caused…
I hope I'm happy
I like this plan.[ 1d100 = 69 ]
But i thought you were the filly police America, who else will protect our freedoms?
man, i just realized how close that filly is to making dreamworks face
What's filly gonna do to me? I' fugging hyuge.
I'm interrogating myself though, so it'll be over quickly
that's what I think, faggot
prepare to bust out the hardcore cuddling tactics, i'm not breaking
I will do whatever is necessary to make myself talk, even skipping breakfast tomorrow!
sometimes I do, usually on those weekend days when I wake up too early and can't sleep
Wow, I must be lucky.
What are filly's plans for valentines?
sitting on the couch and crying into a tub of ice cream :^)
There's one Anon/Anonfilly with a Valentines birthday, so they're probably not going to have much fun.
I'm planning on drawfagging something for them.
this filly knows what's up
Trying not to remember my latest interactions with the fairer sex.
Family has never felt closer.
sitting at home, doing what she does every other day
fucking brainlet purple, can't even understand Newton's laws!
all powerful unicorn princesses can't into the laws of physics.
File: 1518324255517.jpg (Spoiler Image, 117.59 KB, 645x729, 1605042__explicit_twilight….jpg)
Well, what do you expect from Purple, who has been taught magic all her life?In reality, I'm just glad I have an excuse to use this image.
I expect better, that's for sure. That picture makes me think that she's debating like a leftist, and that's just not good.
>>116571>debating like a leftist
What, she's explaining exactly how the world works in equestria, she's totally correct and has facts to back it up. All anon has is rampant intellectualism from the wrong dimension.
that doesn't excuse her very apparent butthurt from this debate
if someone came up to you and started spouting bullshit about how the earth was square and the sun was a golden apple fixed in the sphere of flame above the sky, you'd be pretty upset at them too.
no, I'd just laugh and walk away.
And when they persist and keep talking about it, following you with the doggedness of a true autist?
ignore them? calmly explain otherwise?
go home and go about the rest of my day peacefully?
I don't think Purple has the ability to not take the bait
are you sure you're autistic enough to post here?
I'm a national capitalist who masturbates to ponies, is there anything else that needs to be explained?
Ponk should know better than to lewd the Filly.
Also, checking those blessed dubs.
ponky isn't even the hot one…
Going to College.>>116588
I'm the faggot that wants to be molested as a filly. This pleases me greatly.
i already have all of those though
and proper filly lewds when?
Edit that shit out if you're going to post it faggot.
fug sorry, if it makes you feel better I only get my shit from /mlpol/
When you think about it in hindsight, that jump could have gone worse. You could have jumped too low, and not only missed Cadance, but also missed the next car entirely, placing you immediately under the tracks to be crushed by the train's wheels. Or you could have hit Cadance and dragged her down with you to be crushed by the train's wheels. In fact, you probably still could try to do just that by violently shaking her to see if you could disrupt her surprisingly good flight skills. Seriously, who the hell can hover perfectly between two fast moving train cars while carrying a filly? Apparently it's Princess "I was a pegasus before I became an alicorn" Cadance.
But enough of that nonsense, it's time to be passive aggressive.
"So what are you going to do, tie me up for the entire trip?"
<"Honestly I was going to just leave your punishment to Velvet and Night Light, but that's an excellent idea. Thanks, Anon!"
As Cadance flies you back to your original passenger car, you feel like kicking yourself for giving her that idea. She sits down in one of the seats, keeping you in her arms the entire time.
<"Hey Velvet, do you have anything that could be used to tie up Anon? She's going to keep trying to run around unless I do something."
<<"I might. Lemme see here for a second."
Velvet starts rummaging through her backpack for about a minute, leaving you to wonder just what the hell she packed in those 20 minutes. At long last, she brings out a strange black object with a hook at the end. She fires it at the wall, extending the hook and revealing a rather sizable length of rope that should not logically be able to fit in there.
<<"Will a grappling hook do, deary?
<"You have a GRAPPLING HOOK?"
<<"Do you not?"
then we must track down the OP of that image and call him a faggot
this just raises questions
We know from the show that Twilight Velvet is a thrill seeker who's into shit like bungee jumping and barrel riding. I'd also like to think she's the kind of pony who carries a grappling hook around just because why not?
"Of course I do, mine just doesn't have a box that it fires out of. Also it's technically in another dimension at the moment… Sexy."[ 1d100 = 78 ]
At that point you might as well just shoot me.[ 1d100 = 88 ]
>>116607>>116606>again with all the 8s
Hitler likes us.
No wait, I changed my mind! Can't you just hold me real tight instead? I'll be a good filly, I promise! Now attempt to get cuddly. [ 1d100 = 44 ]
What, don't want to get shot by a harpoon? should have thought of that before being a smartass.
I'm sorry to everyone that figured the riddle out, I'm just feeling spiteful towards Reuben. All these updates… how can I fucking compete?!
>You ponder it heavily, seeing that both of your lives are on the line.
>League wasn't perverse enough to use a riddle that involved dicks, was she?
>"Clock's ticking, Anon."
"Ha! You gave up your little game, League!"
>You hear her mumble under her breath "Metagamer…"
>You strut over to the alphabets, taking one out of each set in alternating order, forming a set of Twelve.
>You mumble as you input them,
"A-1, B-2, C-3, D-4, E-5, F-6, G-7, H-8, I-9, J-10, K-11, L-12!"
>You sport a smug smile as you input the last one.
>The giant stone slab falls into place as you look at League, bewhildered.
>She's sporting a shit-eating grin.
>The room begins to fill with… is that methane?
>You sigh and sit down.
>Methane poisoning was going to take a long fucking time…
>"And so the two brave adventurers were never heard from again, all because Anon was horrible at interpreting context clues!"
>You need a drink.
Calmly explain you only wanted to find the bathroom, but after seeing you nearly fell to your demise that's a bit unnecessary now.[ 1d100 = 84 ]>>116496
That's what happens when you get rid of IDs. I'd use a different flag but this is the only VPN location that works.
Interesting how filly almost perished there, only by abusing the rules did we avoid getting squished. More D&D style roles, pls.
"Grandfather is only eleven letters tho…
It was just shitty banter…
"I prefer claw arms instead, personally."
Oh, and distract them with a game![ 1d100 = 74 ]>>116612
Brandy or tequila?[ 1d100 = 3 ]
>>116612>being rude to Reuben
what do you have against him?
he clearly meant he was jealous at ruebens prodigious writing talents, not truly spiteful.
Calm down anon.
FIlly wants some of comrade glimmers special reserve Vodka.[ 1d100 = 67 ]
Literally nothing. I was just fucking around. The entire sequence was just my attempt to take a break and write something lighthearted for once, and I figured a playful jab at a fellow writefag would be a fine way to end it.
Meanwhile, I'm an equal opportunity spiter.
you don't spite me do you?
>all this drama
I was never part of this to begin with, but I'll just input too. This is why I don't trust other people to write my stories for me!
I spite everypony. I like to give my filly the full freedom to do whatever she wants to, but with consequences around every turn.
>>116612>You're about to go out and try to hunt one down when you hear Purple calling.>League really got you on that one.>"Fillies! Dinner!">Oh shit.>You likely weren't getting out of this situation without some scrapes and bruises…>League notices your wide eyes and drops the look.>"What's wrong?"
"Twilight knows about you.">"So? She seemed fine with it earlier."
"I didn't say it was you… I just said I had 'brought over a friend.' I'm fucked…">"I could always just cite a prior engagement and leave…">You weigh your options.>Having League leave right now would probably be a bit suspicious, but you could talk your way out of Purple's wrath.>On the other hand, you're in for a lonely night if she doesn't stay.
Well you'll never
know what's up if you don't sink your teeth into all of the green you can.
More content written for you all, hope you enjoy it as always.
>as you now have the opportunity to walk to school as opposed to being teleported, you decide to look around a bit beforehand
>this town is really quite beautiful in its simplicity
>plenty of houses and small businesses around
>/pol/ really would like it here
>it's a comfy town
>as you make the walk, the sun rises higher above the horizon
>when you get to school, there's a few minutes left before the bell rings, so you go and sit on that bench
>you pass quite a few fillies and colts along the way, including the CMC
>might as well get it over with now
>if you do it now, you won't have to do it later
>just do it, you pansy!
"Hey, Sweetie Belle?"
>she stops talking to the other two and turns towards you
>"Hey Anonymous, how are you?"
>you don't have to do very much more, just say it and be done
"Spike told me to say hi to you for him, that's about it."
>she looks a bit disappointed that that's all you wanted to say, but she almost instantly brightens back up
>"Alright, tell him I said hi too!"
"I'll do that. See you around."
>and with that, you walk off back towards your bench
>you have a good view of everything happening when you get back there
>you also notice DT and SS walking around near you
>when they see you, DT immediately starts walking a different direction
>dat nat 20 keeping its effect
>after some more time spent sitting, the bell rings and you go inside to your desk
>same schedule as before, so you're pretty much just free to fall asleep again
>so, you do
>. . .
>your dreams aren't as eventful as the last night's while you're asleep in class
>Luna's probably off doing more important things
>the "EXTERMINATUS" button is nowhere to be found
>and you're a human sitting at a bar
>so far not that weird
>Celestia's the bartender
>"What would you like to drink?"
>you're not really a fan of alcohol, but fuck it
>you're 22 and this is a dream
"Jack and coke, please."
>Celestia makes you the drink and hands it to you
>as you drink it, you don't feel any different
>that's to be expected, it's not real after all
>still tastes pretty good though
>you might have to actually try this when you get back home
>or your mind might just be messing with you again
>speaking of your mind, you let it wander while you're sitting in the dream bar
>and of course, it goes back to that moment in the Canterlot Castle
>that one which you were never going to bring up again, especially around Celestia
>this is why you wish you had a different brain sometimes
>but this gives you an idea
>she didn't get to see it and you're starting to feel hot and bothered again for the 9000th time here
>are you sure that dream booze isn't affecting you?
>this is still a dream though, so why the fuck not?
"Hey Tia, want to come to the bathroom with me? We can pick up where we left off in the throne room, and I might be able to show you something new, too."
>she blushes, but the look on her face doesn't say no
>"My shift ends soon, why not?"
>you get up from the stool you're sitting at and you two head off to the bathroom
>when you two get there, you enter a stall and she comes in with you
>you turn around to face her and start undoing your pants, but she stops you
>you stop and let her take over
>she gets your pants down fine
>she's about to get to your underwear
>COCKBLOCKED AGAIN BY REAL LIFE
>you open your eyes, now even more frustrated that you were this morning, to see the other school children running outside for recess
you get up too, and when you do you see a puddle on your own chair
>it's not pee
>let's hope no one sees that
>you go outside to join the rest of the class and take your spot on your bench
>it's pretty comfy, and the sun's nice and warm
>but you're not going to be able to get that dream back, or the other one
>so you just sit in disappointment
>eventually everyone goes inside again, so you follow them in>you stay awake through science class but don't pay attention>instead you pull your phone out and play with it under the desk>when history comes, you put it back away because Twilight wants you to pay attention here>it's not as interesting as the lesson about Germaneigh, but it's still new information>Apparently Celestia only formally accepted her role as Princess 1,215 years ago, and was supposed to be splitting her duties with Luna>we all know how that went>it's not too much of a problem though, everything's somewhat alright now>when the lunch bell rings and you go outside, you realized that you never grabbed any food>fug>you sit and wait in hunger, your pancake from this morning having already been digested>you're gonna have to ask Spike about food when you get back>the other ponies are all eating their food, and you don't have any friends to ask about it>at least you have food at the castle, there are other yous stuck with Twilights that don't feed them>or worse, you could be stuck in Lone15's story>that filly's gonna fucking die, but here you are bitching about forgetting your food>that thought doesn't really make you feel better when you remember that there are also other yous that didn't forget their lunches>oh well, only a couple more hours until you can bug Spike about it>after a long, foodless wait, the lunch bell rings and you head back inside>writing is pretty easy again>you notice Ms. Cheerilee staring at you while writing>probably miring your skills with a pencil>either that, or she thinks you're weird for using your hoof to write>fuck what she thinks, this works for you and it works well!>you hand in the assignment and use the rest of your time to keep writing>you write through your first day of school right as your second day of school ends>time to go bother Spike about lunch!>you pack up your stuff and leave, making it back to the castle in about 20 minutes>you open the door>get on the floor>and yell at the "dinosaur" in the building with you
"Hey Spike, where are you?!">he yells back a couple of seconds later>"I'm in the library!">time to go to the library>you go to your room and drop off your bag and then try to find the library>no success>have you even been to the library?>how would human you deal with this?>you got it
"MARCO!">silence>is marco polo even a thing here?>"What!?">it must not be>looks like you'll have to explain it
"Just yell back POLO when I yell MARCO, got it!?">silence for another second>"Sure, Whatever!">and so this continues for about 10 minutes until you find your way to the library>you see spike standing on a ladder dusting a bunch of books
"Hey, what's up?">he looks down from his perch>"Doing list things. Speaking of which, I'm gonna need your help for some of this.">your help?>is it really that hard to do himself?>did you really not expect this, though?>you knew you were going to have to help him to not fuck up at some point, just not for him to ask you directly
"Alright, but other matters first. I forgot to grab a lunch for myself, what's in the fridge?">Spike slides down the ladder holding the duster>"There's some stuff there, and I haven't eaten lunch either. Let's go eat!"
>not too long later, you and Spike are digging through the refrigerator>it's all just vegetables, kinda disappointing>but what isn't, in this world of vegans>"See anything you want, or any ideas on what to make?"
"Nah, it's all just vegetables to me.">you look a bit deeper in the fridge and find something that you can work with>a carton of eggs
"Do you mind if I make lunch, since you made breakfast?">Spike looks over to you>"Do you know how to make what you're gonna make?">fuck yeah, you do!>it's one of the few things you know how to do without microwave instructions!
"Yeah, I know.">"Alright, just don't set anything on fire.">stupid dragon, he's the one who sets things on fire!>you grab the rest of the materials you need>butter, a pan, a bowl, a fork, and a spoon>time to make some motherfucking eggs>after some trial and error, you figure out a good way to crack the eggs into the bowl>from there, it's all much easier>in a few minutes, you've got two plates of scrambled eggs done>finally, something with protein!>you put away the unused eggs and butter and put the dirty dishes with the used ice cream bowls from yesterday>you give a plate of eggs to Spike and sit down to eat your own plate>you also grabbed forks for both of you, because you still don't like the idea of shoving your face into food after the spaghetti incident>as you start eating, you notice Spike just staring at what's in front of him>"What is this?">he points to the plate with a confused look
"Dude, it's scrambled eggs. Just try it, I swear it's not that bad.">he reluctantly tries a bit, and then starts eating it more normally>"Where'd you learn to make this, it tastes good!">you can't tell him exactly where, but you can generalize
"I learned to make it at home.">not exactly the whole truth, but definitely not a lie>you go back to eating as Spike decides to make another comment about your choice of food>"You might have to teach me how to make this, I've never even seen it before.">all in due time, Spike>you finish your food and take the plate to the dirty dish pile>Spike finishes his food and does the same
"Alright, so what do you need my help with?">"We have to go and pick up some things, and before you ask, it IS a two-pony job. She even wrote that down, funnily enough.">as you follow Spike to the door, you can only help but think that what you're going to be helping with is either dangerous, important, or both>you'll just have to wait and see
Please stay with me, it's horrible, I'm sad and alone and twilight is so mean and I think I'm losing my mind in this world I can't take it any more and I can't stand another night in the castle without anyone to talk to.
Twilight is lawful evil, isn't she? You can hold her to her word even if she'll be spiteful about it, right?[ 1d100 = 20 ]>>116633>>116634>>116635
Beautiful. It's probably for the best Luna was asleep or whatever, you wouldn't want her to see you doing naughty things with her sister.
Now while we're here ask about the grappling hook. There's got to be a good story there.[ 1d100 = 21 ]
"Maybe a little tighter mama velvet?"[ 1d20 = 7 ]
I'm retarded, rolling the big die.[ 1d100 = 41 ]
Whoa momma. I-is Velvet getting kinda… with us? Wew.
Looking out for her son and Cady like that. What a gal.
Velvet remembers what it's like to be a teenage little pony.
>is constantly armed
Never implied that. Only that she's armed at the current moment. And a grappling hook isn't really intended to be used as a weapon, so much as it is a means of getting around.
I fixed the punishment.
"This guy shit himself trying to get me fired!">she gets angry and turns to babby>"What did I tell you about trying to manipulate ponies? Well guess what missy, you're sleeping in the crib tonight!">Anonbabby starts making sad moaning noises, making her eyes as big as possible>"Don't try that on me, young lady! Just for that, you're gonna be fed from a bottle tonight.">Babby lowered her head and made a quiet, soft-pitched whine>"Maybe think about that before you try to hurt others with tactical shits again.
Well I must be one of the legions of the retarded because I don't notice jack shit.
Patrician-tier meme. I applaud you.>>116648
Snuggle down in her lap and swish your tail around, giving an affirmation. Ask Velvet a buncha questions, like when she was captured, how she met Night Light, and where babies come from
. You're just an innocent cute filly.[ 1d100 = 52 ]
but don't we already know the answer to that one? and didn't Twilight give us back our memories of us explaining that we know it?
I still do not understand.
Yeah, but the others don't know that we know, right?Maybe I'm just confused.
>>116628Last update for tonight. Still trying to recover.
"Please don't leave. I know it might not end well, but the alternative of being here alone tonight… I-I just don't know if I could take it.">She gives you a soft smile.>"We're in this together, right?"
"Just like always.">"Just like always.>The two of you stay close as you navigate the castle over to the dining room.>Twilight's smile immediately turns to a frown as she sees who you brought.>"Little League, what an… unexpected surprise."
"So, what's for dinner?">Twilight glares at you, but responds.>"Ravioli with pesto.">League continues to feign oblivion as the three of you eat quietly, Twilight pausing every once in a while to mumble something under her breath that you can't make out.>Needless to say, the two of you eat very quickly.>"Thanks for the meal, Twilight.">"Princess Twilight.">You laugh a bit, prompting another icy stare from Purple.>You see Twilight's horn light up a tiny amount as you begin to hear her voice in your mind.>'Don't think I don't know what you're doing, you little shit.'>Laughterstops.mp3>Your blood runs cold as your suspicions are confirmed.>You're not sure if this is an open-ended channel, but you respond regardless.
'Just leave her out of this, please.'>'I'll do whatever the hell I want to, once I decide what that is. Now run along and enjoy the rest of your little sleepover.'>Fuuuuu>You would love to do just that, if Purple hadn't just…>You don't even want to know what she's going to do to you.>Regardless, League is counting on you to host, the night is young, and you still haven't even cracked open any childish board games yet.>Input action.
The answer to which one? I don't remember any of those things. Ask anyway. Especially the one about Nightlight and the babies.
You know what you need to lighten the mood? A cheerful song like one of the ones from the show![ 1d100 = 89 ]
This may be the end of us, we'd better live it up while we have a life to live up. Lets party.[ 1d100 = 81 ]
I have the feeling we may need to get working on that shotgun soon…
I don't know if I need to roll for this or not, but I'll do it anyway.[ 1d100 = 32 ]
subtle, I like it. Also Satan quads lul
You still need sulfur and charcoal, you can't do it tonight. Better to figure out where to hide saltpeter and plan how to appease Twilight.
can't we keep hiding this shit under the bed?
then where do you suggest we hide it?
stump remover should be hidden under a floorboard tbh.
Where are the clef and the staff?
How are we supposed to figure out what notes those are supposed to be without those?
musicfags can't into symbolism.
*drawfags can't into musical notation
Fall asleep for the rest of the trainride in her arms (legs?) [ 1d100 = 11 ]
also, I'm surprised that nobody used any >of these
>Taking Lone's shitty offbrand MS-paint drawing for anything more than a fifteen second filler piece
>You began to dog paddle upwards and backward. You really wanted to look up towards the surface to see where you were going but you didn't want to take off your eyes off the creature. Although you paddled your most, you didn't get very far. Because you hooves were so small, your paddle only moved you a bit higher up towards the surface.
>The head that you had come close to ascended towards you. Its neck wasn't fully stretched out so it began to stretch itself towards you. You saw three other of its heads either shaking there head, seemingly to wake up or reaching after you.
Wait, three? There were five. Where is the last head? You thought.
>You looked at the part of the hydra's torso that was the base for the heads' necks. There you saw the neck of the missing head and followed it with your gaze. It went under and up behind you.
>You spun around in the water. The missing head was behind you and its snout was so close to you that it actually poked you in the stomach. It seemed to have some kind of grin on its face.
>A yellow cloud formed between your legs and slowly dispersed. You put our hooves on the snout of the hydra and tried to push yourself away from it. It opened its mouth a bit. You became afraid that it would open it completely so you did something pointless in retrospect. You put one front hoof on either side of its jaw and tried to hold the mouth closed.
>Very suddenly you were being pushed in the stomach again by the creature's snout. Because it came so suddenly and with so much force, the impact caused your back hooves and front hooves to fall downwards as the rest of your body continued being pushed upwards to the surface. The impact had caused you to lose all the air in your lungs as it had been pushed out and you had released it all in a gasp. The gasp from your mouth shot out bubbles like an underwater volcano.
>You were pushed up to the surface on the snout of the creature. You fell off its snout onto the beach when it breached the surface. Your fall hadn't been so high and you landed on your hooves so it hadn't hurt so bad even though the beach was covered in mostly small rocks and a few patches of grass.
>You began to inhale and exhale now that you had air to breath. You rolled over on your side to looked back towards the pond. You saw that the head that had breached the surface with you focused its gaze at you as it slowly sank down into the water. Before it had submerged under water you thought that you saw the creature grin at you.
Maybe, you thought. Since this is probably is the universe of my little pony, a tv show for little girls. Every creature is friendly and the dangerous creatures are only a bit grumpy. That only needs a serious talking to. Maybe that is why the hydra didn't eat me just now.
>Then the pond exploded.
>Two claws had gripped the edge off the pond and those claws had dragged up the rest of the hydra out the pond. This had caused a large volume of water that was previously in the pond to fly up into the air. When this water returned back to the ground again, it came back as an artificial torrent of rain. If you weren't already drenched, you would have been.
>In the midst of the sound of the patter from the waterdrops that hit the ground, there was a roar made by five hydra heads simultaneously. The sound was so loud that you had to cover your ears with your hooves. It sounded like there was a choir with different depths in their voices, who roared together. Low and high tones were mixed and there was gargling noise in the roar as well. You heard a screeching sound that you knew didn't come from the hydra but came from your ears since they were recovering from the shock of the high volume of the roar.
filly's gonna die
You make yourself as comfortable as you can, swishing your tail around to gently tickle Mama Velvet's legs. Now seems like just as perfect a time as ever to pester her with questions.
"Hey Velvet, how'd you manage to get captured by changelings if you had a grappling hook?"
<<"Well I don't carry it on me all the time, sweetie. Besides, it's really difficult to use when some nice young mare walks up to you and asks you if her handkerchief smells like chloroform."
"Oh, right… well dang those changelings and their spy tactics. Why can't they fight a conventional war?"
Purple pipes up again, apparently unable to concentrate on her book when ponies are acting silly.
>"Conventional war is for ponies who don't want to win."
"It was a rhetorical question, jeez."
>"Well, like it or not, we're dealing with an enemy that doesn't like to play by the rules. If I was in Celestia's place, I'd play dirty too."
<<"Now Twilight, I'm sure the princess knows what she's doing."
>"I'm sure she does. But wouldn't it be nice if after she beats 'em this time, we don't have to face 'em again?"
"Well hey, I did get my cutie mark predicting they'd lose for good."
>"Will that be from Celestia's actions?"
"Admittedly, not really."
>"Right, well… I'm just saying. This entire situation could be handled differently. Now whatever, I'm going back to reading."
"Well fine. Hey Velvet… how'd you and Night Light meet?"
<<"Well that's easy, we were classmates as foals!"
The next hour or so is filled with Velvet and Night Light reminiscing about their youth. Night Light was apparently a bit of a wuss as a young colt, and it took him ages to muster up the courage just to ask Velvet on a date to the local theater on Hearts and Hooves Day. There was also apparently a time when she had to beat up a couple of stallions that were picking on him for hanging out at the old ponies' home to play bingo with them. So now you know where Purple and Shiny get their geekiness from. Well, at least you know where Shiny gets it from. You're not so sure about what kind of weirdo Purple was back on Earth.
You can't remember much beyond this, as you end up falling asleep in Velvet's lap. When you wake up, you can see that outside, it's starting to get dark. But on the bright side, the train's stopped.
You're in Ponyville now.
Well that's sweet. I can't even begin to imagine what we should do. Just as filly is waking up from a nap I'm about ready to go to bed.
Follow the rest of the family to your temporary home. Shenanigans can start afterwards. [ 1d100 = 69 ]
I guess it is how I form my sentences that is awkward. I agree with that. I am working on it but I find it hard to change since I can't really put my finger on way it becomes the way it is. Thanks for the input anyway.>>116279
Thank you. I am actually trying to be as descriptic as possible both since I personally enjoy that in fiction and also to train my self to write better. i also want to be able to write subtlely in a showing kind of way in the future. So it was nice to hear, that my writting actually was "imagery". >>116274>>116701
Filly isnot for eating. Filly is for cuddles Hydra :D>>116700
his story figured out quite far from here actually, so I will write the continuation of it in about 24 hours. Gladyou liked it. >>116394>"Of course!"
"What is the next part of your master plan?">"Derailing this train with no survivors!">>116278
Hehe, yeah why not. Ancapanonfilly might like having one of them as her dad and she would be gaining the other as an uncle.
It is funny that you mention their reunion. I have this crossover fanfiction story that I have been working on. It is basically fate stay night but with ponies.
I have made efforts to intergrated story elements from fsn into mlp in good way. With that I mean for example they are not fighting for the grail but for Luna's dreamcatcher in this story and some other stuff.
Anyway one of the flimflam brothers in that story forms a pact with a champion from the future how happens to be Twlight sparkle.
Do this, with this roll for action
>>115709>3 days>600+ posts
Who gave the filly sugarcubes for her to be so hyper?
we've been operating at maximum fun posting levels
Forgot to roll
I truly burned through this thread, didn't I?
>>116851>ywn shitpost irl with a bunch of fillies
why you gotta hurt me like this, me?
We would have daily threads
They re getting good at it>Implying they werent just checking another random report when they saw that thread pop up
Spamming/Flooding bans automatically purge all posts by the user.
What if the OP for some other general makes a post in an Anonfilly thread and gets b& for """Spamming/Flooding"""?
If they purge posts, the thread might be deleted. It would work that way for spammers who post many threads to fill the board.
Has everyone stopped making threads on /qa/ about this bullshit?
Has everyone stopped trying to get in contact with the mods at their IRC simply because they know they'll get banned by that prick?
What about Gook? Has everyone stopped trying to reach him?
You know deep inside that simply ignoring this and waiting for a while is not going to fix anything: That moderator will think he's won and will always abuse his power and do this forever and ever.
Just a thought here: Wouldn't posting threads calling the mod out on his bullshit be better in the long run than creating ordinary Anonfilly threads that just keeps getting removed for retarded reasons be? Either he eventually goes into full autism mode and creates a sticky that basically let's everyone know how he abuses his powers to get rid of all things Anonfilly and other things of fillies or colts that may be slightly lewd but does not break the rules, or actions will be taken after a while and the current mod will get his ass kicked out.
Now if only they put that much effort into banning the actual offtopic/shitposty stuff, But i guess its just how they are Y'know?
mods don't pay any attention to threads on /qa/
the mods won't listen on IRC
Gook doesn't give a fuck
As for your suggestion, that would be a direct violation of Global Rule 8: Complaining about 4chan (its policies, moderation, etc) on the imageboards may result in post deletion and a ban.
>>116912>mods don't pay any attention to threads on /qa/>the mods won't listen on IRC>Gook doesn't give a fuck
Was just typing the exact same post nearly
You go to irc, they tell you to fuck off and go to /qa/ where they can ignore it
Gook doesn't care and the mods know this. They can do what the fuck they like as no one is going to stop them.
Well, look on the bright side: we still have /mlpol/.
Also to add, the mods are one big faggot clique. You have to slurp enough cock as a janny before getting in so they are never going to turn on one of their own because he abused his position.
I hardly ever go on /mlp/ any more. I lurk for 4CC threads and that is about it. The greens in certain threads finished up so I took that as a chance to get off those rides.
You step off the train and take your first step into Ponyville. The town is… not as large as you'd remembered it from the show. Or at least it doesn't look that well populated from the station. On the bright side though, the entire town smells fruity. You can both see and smell the massive apple and pear orchards that partially surround the town and border the nearby Everfree Forest, which doesn't look all that intimidating from afar.
A million ideas for how to mess with ponies and make new friends bombard your head, but you immediately push them away. It's too late to bother with that nonsense, and more importantly, you need to use the little fillies' room real badly.
After a quick pit stop at the train station bathroom, you follow Twilight and family over to the tree fort, sitting in the middle of the town. To your surprise, it's actually pretty spacious, although there aren't a ton of rooms. For the six of you, there are two rooms on the upper floors, plus the basement. There's also the living room, which would be where all of the books would be stored had this place been turned into a library proper. But seeing how the upper rooms have a direct view of the living room, it doesn't seem like a good place to bunk.
This leaves one major question: which pair of ponies will be taking the basement?
Have you been enjoying your time since you got here?
That's kind of what I meant: Simply pretend you never existed and the mod will think they have won; they will be reminded of this and the power they have every single time you make any Anonfilly post anywhere and remove you for retarded reasons because they know they've won.
I'm thinking that if you remind them about their bullshit actions long enough, then they will slip up sometime and say something really stupid.
you were a basement dweller on earth, and so you shall be a basement dweller in equestria.[ 1d100 = 10 ]
Well, obviously you can't let Shiny and Cadence have their privacy, so you'll be taking the basement with Twilight. The lovebirds will just have to sleep next to Shining's parents. [ 1d100 = 5 ]
Call dibs on the basement with Twi! [ 1d100 = 40 ]
Must say, its a completely different place, in a good way too
In a hand i much prefer it here, in another i d like to get back to my abusive homeAlso hello mod, cant hide from me after i got trained on mod warfare back on mulp pham, dont even try fishing for stuff
I-i mean, you can fish for stuff if you want, n-n-no bully
Thanks for everything yall have done for the thread>>116944
At this point i think its unanonimous that Filly shoud try to get the basement with purple, but gonna roll to also play a dirty card on Shining and Cadance to make sure they cant get it themselves
>>116966Your mod warfare training obviously didn't prepare you for overtly friendly random Nor/mlpol/ice Anons, then.
Also, consider your dubs Czech'd.
Basement lair with Twi sounds fun[ 1d100 = 18 ]
>thread is full of low rolls
We are doomed
I blame my PTSD, you re definetly a mod since there s no such thing as 'nice' anons, Lone15 is a mod passing as writefag to get a reaction to explain some greater ploy he has in mind, the 1(one) america fag is a mod looking out at my every move, and everyone of you are out to get the filly
But guess what, you ll never take me alive!I know there will be people who will take this post seriously, its not serious guys
if you're worried about low rolls, then maybe this will make you feel better.[ 1d100 = 16 ]
If I am going to be totally honest I am only active in this thread. I have lurked other threads that were not straight up /pol/ but didn't know enough to post actively so need to lurk moar. I avoid the /pol/ threads as its not my thing really.
Boosting for higher roll.[ 1d100 = 31 ]
Not bad, son.
Lemmie check 'em for ya.[ 1d100 = 18 ]
>>116999>Average is 57
Meh, better, but still meh
Digits can only improve so many rolls, checked
It doesn't take a lot of thinking to realize that taking the basement for yourself and Twilight would be the best idea. If you took one of the upstairs rooms, the other would be taken by either Shiny and Cadance, or by Velvet and Night Light, and both of those groups are going to want to have sex. You don't want to have to hear any of that, and you're pretty sure Shiny shouldn't be knocking Cadance up early anyways. If left alone in a basement, he'd be fucking her non-stop. Meanwhile, you've spent plenty of time living in a basement, and today would be no different.
And thus, you and Purple end up moving into the basement. It's not that spacious, but then again, neither are the guest rooms. And best of all, you have total privacy. What you lack, however, is natural light. Fortunately, there's an oil lamp to keep the place livable, particularly for Purple who needs her reading time.
After a little bit of unpacking, it becomes pretty apparent to everypony that you all haven't eaten since breakfast. It's about 7 PM, and there's no food in the house, though at least the place is furnished. Since it's a bit too late to be buying groceries, everypony's general consensus is to eat out somewhere.
Do you have any suggestions?
Come on man. I've become acutely aware lately of just how lonely I am. Why you gotta bring up the sad thoughts?
Hmm… did you mention whether or not it was already furnished? If is is, unpack and prepare for maximum comfort. If it's not, acquire furtiture and refer to option 1. [ 1d100 = 15 ]
go somewhere good for food and then spend some time out getting some cool shit to put in your new basement[ 1d100 = 90 ]
I think I mentioned that in the third paragraph.
Does SCC exist yet? If so, go hit up Mr. and Mrs. Cake. [ 1d100 = 2 ]
Mod war PTSD filly when?[ 1d100 = 75 ]
I'd like to know if it even exists yet, but I think cake isn't a good meal.
Go find some greasy Hayburgers™ or peezer, then go find some cake at SCC for desert[ 1d100 = 65 ]
Filly needs her comfort food. Go to hayburger and then see if mama Velvet will let us get a treat at SCC after. [ 1d100 = 97 ]
Get out of my mind
"How about hayburgers?"
Everypony nods in agreement.
>"Yeah, hayburgers sounds rather nice."
And so, the family takes a trip down to the Ponyville equivalent of a McDonalds. Well, technically it's called "Grandpa Pie's Hayburgers and Fries", but close enough. It's probably one of the few eating establishments around here, aside from Sugar Cube Corner (which apparently only opened up in the last year or so), and a nice pasta and salad place. Really, you get the sense that this town is about half empty. But somehow, you get the feeling that this may change over the coming few years.
You sit down at a table, and Night Light goes off to get everypony's orders. Scanning the room while you wait, you can already see a few familiar faces, though you can't necessarily place a name to all of them, as you never knew too much about background ponies. You're pretty sure one of them goes by "Carrot Top", and at least one of the ponies around her is probably her mother. The rest though… you're drawing blanks.
Eventually the food makes it to your table, and you stuff your face. It doesn't have the same level of substance that you'd expect out of a burger, but at least it's greasy and filling. Purple at least doesn't seem to mind, based on her relatively poor table manners. Wiping your ketchup-stained mouth with a burger? Is she doing that just to imitate what she remembers of Twilight from the show, or was she like this at home in Virginia? You try to be a bit more polite in your table manners, only to find that, without hands, holding a burger is super awkward. You hope you'll get used to it.
Declare the burgers officially bomb-ass [ 1d100 = 22 ]
silly twi, doesn't she know that the middle of the night is real bat filly hours?
She's vengeance. She's the night…
>>117117>ywn cuddle and quote along with filly as you watch wayne's world together
You're petting her ears lovingly, why would you fear her teeth?
I have bad experiences with petting things with overly sharp teeth. I've generally learned that staying as far away from their head as possible is the route to go for.
Her fangs are beautiful. Don't be a bitch.>>117138
Be gentle and you'll have nothing to worry about. She's not a wild animal.
>Thread is 3 days old
>Thread is 90% of the way to the 800 post benchmark
God damn the fillys here have been busy
Did this thread hit bump limit already?
this is what happens I get my full shitpost on, good threads die an early death.
i want to wake up to filly's smiling face everyday and tell her i love her then enjoy her reaction as she calls me a faggot with a blushi'd be a happy faggot though
I think bump limit is 500 but it takes forever to fall off the page. 800 seems to be the best balance for performance and refreshing images.
This time when the thread hits >800 we could just use the "last 50 replies" option to avoid lag. We already have a bunch of old threads still sitting in the catalog, burning through these threads over and over again with the speed we have this one would almost be spamming.
Whether or not we can avoid lag is irrelevant. There is an anon, who I refer to as "1-800 fillies", who will always create a new thread at 800 replies. It's just what he's going to do, and there's nothing any of us can do to stop it.
Fuck, we're close to 800 posts, aren't we?
It is not the lag due to the 50 replies option, it is the fact images become locked
I have also missed posts using the last 50 option if there has been >50 while I have been asleep or not checked the thread while at work so I have to view the full thread anyway
images are locked past 800 replies?
Damn it, that's like only a couple more updates for me to churn out. And thus far our story this thread has only progressed from getting on the train to eating fast food in Ponyville.
I mean you can't post the same image twice in a single thread, so once a thread has gotten to a certain size no one can use them again
No, you silly filly, you can't post duplicates.
ah, I thought you were talking about being physically unable to post any more images at all.
who are you calling silly!?
I want to willy the filly silly.
New update, Anon and Spike are off to pick up some shit!
>as you and Spike are walking to where Spike needs the two of you to be, your thirst for knowledge grows unbearable
"What are we even getting?"
>Spike checks the list that he's carrying with him
>"Uh… A few potions from Zecora."
>there must be a lot of them that are pretty important for Twilight to need you to go with Spike
"Does it say what they're for?"
>"No, it just says what they are and how much of them we should be getting."
>well that's boring
"Anything else we need to do while we're out, then?"
>Spike pulls the list even further open and starts reading it
>"Nope, not that I can tell. Just these potions, and we need to bring them to her lab."
>that's more interesting!
>Maybe you could get into some of those machine parts you saw earlier and make something cool
>show purple that she's not the only smart one around here
>or you could fail miserably and hurt yourself or ruin some perfectly good parts
>probably not the best idea
>oh well, this time you might actually get to explore it a bit instead of just going straight to one place to look at one thing
>exploring it would be good enough for now
>as you imagine what untold wonders lie inside Twilight's laboratory, you two get closer and closer to the Everfree Forest
>eventually, the treeline looms directly in front of you and you have no choice but to acknowledge how imposing it all looks
"Zecora actually lives in here?"
>Spike looks up at the treetops and then into the forest
>"Yeah, I don't get it either. It must be a personal choice for her, that's all I can think of."
>at least here the ziggers stay to themselves
>if only that translated over to Earth
>such wishful thinking won't help, though
>it'll just distract you from real solutions
>besides, don't you have something you're supposed to be doing?
>you pull yourself back to reality and follow Spike into the trees
>the Everfree Forest isn't as spooky as you thought, at least not near the edge
>it's just a regular forest, as far as you can tell here
>you see a deer not too far off
>there's also a small pond a bit farther in
>not too bad of a walk so far, light is still filtering through the treetops in beautiful patterns
>as you get farther in, the canopy gets thicker and less light gets through
>now it's not as pretty
>the ponds you pass are now a bit more stagnant looking
>and no deer to be found
>it's also getting a lot spookier very quickly
>you notice yourself getting closer to Spike, who also seems to be noticing the change
>you two continue like this for another few minutes
>suddenly, he stops abruptly
>you do too, since he's still leading you around
>he's frozen for another few seconds, which gives you the chance to hear something
>wood cracking and shifting
>and a lot of it, judging by the sound
>it's also coming from all around you two
>finally Spike interrupts the sound with a whisper
>"Oh no, we're dead out in the open like this!"
>why are we dead?
>what's going on?
>with questions buzzing through your head, you immediately whisper your own question
"Wait, what? Why are we whispering?"
>Spike turns to you with a look of terror on his face
>didn't Applejack make one explode with a few rocks?
>pffft, this isn't that bad!
>you stay standing, as calm as ever with Spike metaphorically shitting himself next to you
"Dude, it's not that bad, it's just a bunch of wood! What are they gonna do, give us splinters?"
>he turns towards you with an expression that tells you that you've gone full retard
>"Timberwolves are one of the most dangerous animals in the forest on their own, and it sounds like an ENTIRE PACK found us!"
>you soon get an even better idea of just how wrong you are when you see one of them step out from behind a tree
>and judging by all those scars, it's one mean son of a birch
>and he's looking straight at you!
>you lose whatever confidence you had almost instantly and your survival instinct kicks into maximum overdrive to find a way out of this>right now it's about 50 feet away>can you run?>even if you could, where?>you look around, noticing a few other timberwolves starting to close in as well>nope, can't do flight>guess you'll just have to fight>but how?>the only things around you are trees, sticks, pebbles, and Spike>wait>Spike!>That's it!>you regain all of your former confidence as a plan forms in your head, and you whisper to Spike
"We're gonna be fine, I have a plan!">Spike stops being scared and turns to you>"Let me hear it, it's probably better than just letting them kill us.">a grin spreads across your face as you put the finishing touches on your plan
"Okay, so timberwolves are wood, right?">"Yeah, but I don't know how that helps us.">wow, does he really not see it yet?>guess you'll just have to tell him
"You're a dragon! You have fire! Breathe in their general direction, and they die instead of us!">he gets a more worried expression hearing this>"I don't know if I can, I've only used my fire to send letters!">you get mildly frustrated at this>every second not putting this plan into action is a second closer to actually dying!
"Then try to send them to a volcano, or something! Just breathe fire at them!">the sound of heavy growling from close by tells you that Big Ugly has almost closed the gap
"It's now or never, Spike! Just breathe deep and thing hot thoughts!">Spike turns towards Big Ugly, now only about 15 feet away, grits his teeth, inhales, and closes his eyes>Big Ugly takes this opportunity to jump straight at you two>you crouch down and say another prayer as he rapidly closes this remaining gap>right as he's about to tackle you two however, he gets blasted by a huge cloud of green fire>direct hit!>when the fire dissipates, you see that it did some pretty heavy damage to Big Ugly, and even managed to catch!>success!>as it tries to deal with the now spreading fire consuming it, Big Ugly gets increasingly erratic>eventually it drops to the ground, and its green eyes fade as Spike's fire turns the rest of its body to ash>that>was>cool!>You look around, scouting the other timberwolves' reactions to this>they all look pretty horrified>guess that guy was their Alpha or something>one of them eventually breaks rank and runs back off into the forest yelping>the rest of them follow, doing the same>heh, pussies!>you then turn back to Spike, who has a look of awe on his face>"I actually did it… I actually did it!"
"Good job, you saved us!">he turns towards you>"No, YOU saved us! I was just ready to sit there and accept it, but you had a plan that worked!">you two turn into an adrenaline-fueled giddy mess about what just happened>soon you two hear something else, but it's definitely not a timberwolf>"What is all this commotion I hear, and why are there timberwolves running in fear?">it's Zecora>if only she'd seen what just happened>Spike is the first to greet her>"You missed it, Zecora! We were attacked by timberwolves, but Anonymous here had a brilliant plan and I completely torched one!">she looks down to the pile of ash in front of you two with a surprised look on her face>"I'm glad you two had them beat, fighting even one timberwolf is no easy feat! Now please follow me back, I have what you seek safe at my shack.">she said it, not you>Zecora leads you two back to her hut without any more interruptions from the wildlife>when you all get there, she goes inside and comes out with two baskets of bottles>they're all full of brightly colored fluids and labeled accordingly>you watch as Spike goes through them all, checking labels and sizes off of the list>it's pretty boring to watch, but eventually he finishes checking off one basket and pushes it over to you>"Can you handle carrying this one, Anon?">you look at the basket a bit closer>it's just a wicker basket, but it does have a sturdy enough handle>you can carry this>you grab the handle in your mouth, trying to not think about where it's been
"Mmhmm!">it's not a very heavy basket, either>Spike finishes checking off the second basket and picks it up>"That's everything, thanks Zecora!">she turns back to go inside and looks back at you two>"I hope your return trip goes alright, this forest is more dangerous in the dark and it's almost night.">"Don't worry, we'll be fine. I've got Anon with me!">"Just remember to follow the light of the moon, and you two will be back at your castle soon!">she waves over her shoulder and goes inside while Spike starts walking back out of the forest>have you two really been in here for that long?>time flies when you have something to do!>with your goods in tow, you and Spike make your way back out of the forest without further incident>soon enough, you look up and see the moon staring you straight in the face>it really has been that long!>you two make it back to the castle about 20 minutes after that>as Spike holds open the door for you, you take one last look at the moon before going inside
At least milkshakes aren't made of hay. You should look around for any of the Mane 6. I don't think the Pies would be in Ponyville at that time.[ 1d100 = 64 ]>>117236
Spike is really dumb, both for going into the Everfree alone and without any contingency plan.
should I have written him differently? I'm always looking to improve, and I will admit that I haven't watched the show in a while.
I'm probably the last person you should ask about that, but Spike seems more like a worrying and cautious individual. He wouldn't venture into such a dangerous place without an adult, otherwise Twilight wouldn't leave him to be alone.
You've got a good point, I'll keep that in mind in the future.
Woe to the filly that still has to pass the time with games. Not gonna be my filly
Don't get all huffy. I'd give you so much cuddles and attention you'd forget about vidya too.
As you finish up your meal, more important tasks soon come to mind. You're in Ponyville now, not Canterlot. Surely, there should be some of the Mane Six around. Well, aside from Twilight, who's sitting immediately in front of you.
You scan the restaurant once again with a more focused eye to find anypony familiar. Unfortunately, this again comes up with no one of importance. You try to think about who might be in town. Guaranteed, Applejack should be in town, you'd just need to visit her farm. Perhaps you might consider doing that tomorrow, assuming Velvet doesn't send you off to the schoolhouse first thing in the morning.
Schoolhouse… that reminds you of another pony who should be in town - Rarity. Your memories of the episode where all of the Mane Six got their cutie marks flash through your mind. Yes, she was a native Ponyvilleian too, and should be attending classes here still. Good to know.
That would leave Pinkie Pie, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy, all of whom may or may not still be on a rock farm and in Cloudsdale respectively. With your luck, they're all out of town for another few more years. Although the thought of Cloudsdale brings another memory to mind: Twilight said earlier that a filly who had escaped from the Cloudsdale orphanage was another one of the human-turned ponies walking around in Equestria. Blossomforth, you think her name was? You don't recall what she said she looked like, but you imagine she must be a pegasus, given where she came from.
These thoughts dominate the forefront of your mind as you walk home with the family. You are now inside of a tree, and it is getting late, but you're not that tired because you slept throughout the train ride. What do?
Everybody knows Blossomforth AND her special abilities. We can only hope she's as thirsty as we are.
We could always take a good long shower or a bath and inspect the ol' vagoo a bit. Probably what I'd do if everyone else was getting settled in for bed.[ 1d100 = 29 ]
Shit, wait, didn't we get a letter from Lyra or something?
Was wondering if you guys were planning on opening that…
That one. Put my roll towards that one.
Yes.[ 1d100 = 55 ]
Open the damn letter then [ 1d100 = 74 ]
Its been too long being serious, needs moar meems
Give the letter to Twilight and after she reads ask what it said, try and sound dismissive
Rolling for this.
HOLY SHIT DUDE
Is there a pastebin?
Thanks a lot Anon. I came in my pants in the coffee shop I'm at the instant I opened that picture, and now I've still got to ride the bus home.
I guess now I'll fit in a little better with the rest of the crowd, actually.
That's normal Anon, it's because you're a lover. Except the purring part. That's a little odd.
"Please?">"No way faggot! I am NOT gonna purr for you. What's your problem anyway?"
"I'll buy you booze. Anything you want.">"…Fine."
yeah i wish i were ponk too
You make your way back to your basement. It's late, but you're not really tired. Well, in a way you are, but it's more like your sleep schedule's completely fucked and so you don't really feel that energized. The weird dream from last night and the changeling scare from the night before have done a little bit of a number on you.
As you climb onto the bed, you notice that you left something on the nightstand - a green letter from Lyra. You kind of forgot about that. Quickly, you open the envelope to see a green sheet of paper with some very fancy handwriting. For someone who used to be a guy, Lyra sure writes like a girl.
. . .
I hear that you and Twilight are heading to Ponyville, which unfortunately means we won't be able to see each other for a while. Knowing this, I've decided to do some thinking about my own future as well, and I don't think Canterlot is going to work out for me. Whoever this Lyra pony was before I became her, she isn't who I am now, and I don't think our "mom" is ever going to get used to who I am now. As such, I've decided I'm going to be running away.
I've saved up enough bits to afford a better musical instrument, a few days worth of food, and a train ticket to Manehatten. I've made a living off of busking before, and I think I can do so again in a city where less "classical" music can be enjoyed. On an unrelated note, I'm also going to be on the lookout for any ponies who might have been humans once. I'm pretty sure there aren't any more left in Canterlot, and I've got a good inkling that we won't make it back to Earth without finding them all.
In a few days' time, I'll send you another letter letting you know where I'll be staying so you can send mail back if you want. In the mean time, I'll be wishing you the best of luck in Ponyville. Maybe I'll pay you a visit sometime if I make enough bits.
P.S. You're still gonna get that dildo.
. . .
Well that was something. What do?
File: 1518486985381.png (Spoiler Image, 2.9 MB, 2400x3805, 1616575__explicit_artist-c….png)
play wit the horsepussy until you're tired, then you can knock out for today[ 1d100 = 13 ]
Kek. But that is one gay filly right there.
We havent made our >Rape quota of the day>Rape the first pony that you find
Seems like a good way to end the night.[ 1d100 = 12 ]
Nag Cadance to read you a bedtime story. She can use the practice for the future.
If she refuses, just violently masturbate until you fall asleep. [ 1d100 = 87 ]
that would most likely be twilight
you TRYING to get us killed?
G-guys, which die is that?
the email dice
Twi is going to murder filly
Filly does not care. Filly is going to get the full filly experience, or riot. Besides, we have been the nice filly for too long. Time for shenanigans.
I would be that little filly…the whole purring thing needs some work
GEE ANON REALLY?!
WOW I DIDN'T KNOW THAT THANKS FOR CLARIFYINGfucking faget
it says right in the image that is a cat and not a pone
either Cadance is gonna accept this, or Reuben's already writing more smut.
I think we will be dialling 1-800-fillies before we get another update
that may be, but I'm still expecting that roll to count.
Well it is the highest roll out of only a couple of suggestions so I can't see why it wouldn't
Do it faget, they'll just arrest you for making a bogus call!
Should I just wait until the next thread to post what I've got for today?
everything must be properly filly-fied>>117566
post it faget
not like copy-pasting to the new thread is much work
yeah, but I'm pretty close to going to bed and new threads are always posted while I'm not here. Fuck it, lemme run it through the spellchecker and I'll post.
New update, I'll copy/paste if I'm still up when the new thread goes live. If not, check here for it.https://pastebin.com/J4G5FWzM
>as you two make your way down to the lab, Spike takes the lead again>the forced silence by you having to carry the basket in your mouth allows you to think about some things>Spike seemed pretty unprepared to go into the forest before>is this not the same universe as the show?>if not, how many other differences are present?>if it is, then what's his excuse?>you might have to ask him>after you can speak without dropping everything, that is>after you two get back down to that huge set of doors, Spike puts his hand on the same spot Twilight did>the doors open, but when you look inside you see that a lot of the cool stuff from earlier has been blocked off by magic barriers>guess she doesn't want Spike touching her stuff>"I think we can just put these over here.">Spike gestures to an area with a large cabinet containing loads of different colored vials and test tubes>strangely, it's the only area not blocked off>Twilight must have thought this is where we'd put them>does that mean she programmed all this security before leaving?>she must work fast, either that or she can do this while she's doing something else>you two get over to the large cabinet and put down your baskets>turns out it's not open, it just has clear doors>not wanting to lose the chance to explore a bit more, you decide to look at its contents>only with your eyes though>for now>"CONCENTRATED SPELLS">this could be pretty interesting>you get closer to try to read some of the individual labels, but Spike chimes in>"Anon, I don't think you should touch any of that. It could turn out pretty bad, not even I know what half of them do.">stupid dragon, didn't even prepare for every eventuality back in the forest!>why should you listen?>besides, you aren't actually going to touch any
"Relax Purple Junior, I wasn't going to touch any.">"Purple Junior?">you turn back towards Spike who is now confused by that comment>did you really just say that out loud?>shit, you did say that out loud>what now?>do you play it down and apologize, or just pretend like it never happened>never happened it is
"What?">"Did you just call me Purple Junior?"
"I think I would remember saying that.">"Whatever, I just wanted to know what that meant.">success>you're not sure how the other option would've gone, but it's too late to find out>maybe some other you tried it>let's hope he's okay>oh well, enough thinking about what's already happened>time to see what "concentrated spells" Twilight has!>"You better not touch any, seriously. There's probably a good reason they're locked down here in the lab.">you ignore Spike and get your face nice and close to read labels>Transformation, Time (forward), Time (reverse), Heat, Cold, Growth, Decay, Teleportation, Animation>at least those spells seem fairly straightforward>except Animation, that one's a bit more difficult to guess>you wonder if you could get away with asking Twilight about it when she gets back>maybe if you word it right you could get an answer>nah, you'd just screw that up
"Alright, I've seen all I wanted.">"I'm just glad you didn't touch any, now let's go. I don't know if Twilight has this place monitored or not, and I don't want her getting suspicious."
>why would he get suspicious?>does he think you're some kind of a midget super spy from a neighboring state?>no, you're just a clueless alien with a sense of curiosity>he'd probably act the same way on Earth, if he ever went there>well, if he wasn't captured by some government and held there until they pulled all the information out of him that they could>that wouldn't be pretty, at least you get to look at a nice color palette while you're stuck here>Earth was pretty okay-tier when it came to aesthetics, and CIA-gray isn't the most popping of colors>the US probably wouldn't be too keen on letting him go, either>they'd probably run experiments on him and dissect him when he inevitably croaks>dang, this got morbid fast!>let's take a few steps back, shall we?>wait, where'd Spike go?>"Anon? If you're done standing there, we could go back upstairs now.">he's over by the door>dangit, quit getting so lost in your thoughts!
"Hold on, I got really sidetracked.">you trot over to the door as he opens it, and the two of you step out>you lead the way back up the stairs this time, since Spike asked>he must not want you going back for whatever reason>it's not like you could get in even if you wanted to, those doors are too thick and you aren't him or Twilight>on a completely unrelated note, you can ask those questions now>thanks again, brain, for the weirdest timing on your reminders!
"You know, I've been thinking. We were pretty unprepared for what happened in the Everfree back there, were we just supposed to hope for the best?">"I actually had an idea of how to deal with anything we might come across at that depth, I just didn't expect timberwolves.">did he not remember that time when they went so far that they COMPLETELY LEFT THE FOREST?
"Don't they have some pretty big ranges, though? It seems like one of the things we should've expected the most.">"Part of the reason that I didn't bother is that they haven't come that close to the edge of the forest in a long time, and I didn't expect them to come back any time soon. Especially not after what happened to drive them that far in, at least.">is he talking about when a bunch of them pulled a Voltron but still got BTFO?>might as well ask
"What drove them in?">Spike pretty much confirms what you already knew>you're not sure what you expected>"But yeah, that was entirely my fault. I had a plan for rockodiles, a manticore, and even a possible hydra but I didn't have a plan for timberwolves.">a plan for a hydra?>you really want to hear about that one!
"What was the plan for a hydra?">he shrugs and gets a small grin>"Hide before it sees us, and if it does, say a prayer to Celestia and run.">yeah, that's about all you could do against a hydra>you two reach the ground floor and you let Spike take the lead again
"What now?">"It's pretty late, so I was thinking about eating. I'm pretty sure you're fine with that?">yes, you are>side quests make you hungry
"Then let's get some food.">Spike leads you back to the kitchen and opens a cabinet when you two get there>he pulls out his gay apron and a less gay-looking spare, probably for you>"Wanna help?">he offers it to you, and you accept it>this should be fun
"So, what are we making?">he opens the fridge and looks around>"Hmmm, I have some ideas, but I need to see what's in the pantry before I make any decisions.">he takes a minute to look inside a cabinet containing even more food>you attempt to tie the apron around yourself while he does this>you're about as successful as when you first tried to put on your saddlebag>you do manage to get it after trying to put it on like a cape first and laying on your back to tie it>stupid mudhorse body, this used to be easy before you got stuck in here!>you stand back up just as Spike finishes gathering ingredients and hardware>"I've figured out what we're gonna make!"
>you walk over and look at the ingredients>you can't immediately tell, but there's still no meat anywhere near here>fucking vegans>Spike's a dragon, too!>shouldn't he be all about meat?
"I have no idea what any of this is for. Can you explain?">"I guess you've never had stir fry before, I hope you like it.">oh, that's what it all makes!>you just feel silly now>you two get to work, with Spike mainly telling you what to do and handling all the more complex parts himself>you're still kind of a brainlet when it comes to food preparation, but you remembered to wash your hooves before you started without him reminding you>after a few more minutes, you two have completed the dish>and you only burned yourself twice!>that counts as a success, right?>oh well, at least it was healed well enough with cold water>you grab a bowl of the stir fry and a fork and go sit down at the table>Spike joins you at the table shortly after having placed all the used dishes on the pile>you start eating, and it's not bad>could still use something of substance, but not bad at all
"Thanks for dinner, man. It's good!">Spike finishes chewing a bite he took and swallows it>"No problem, just remind me to not let you near the stove again.">he laughs after saying that>the rest of dinner goes well and you bring your dishes over to the now decently sized pile>this is getting pretty big, should you do something about it?
"Hey Spike, think we should clean some of these?">he followed you over with his own dishes, so he's also surveying the damages>"I'll handle it, you should probably see if you have any homework today.">homework?>you weren't paying attention again, do you have any?>it's definitely too late to ask anypony about it, you may just have to see what you got handed today for assignments and go from that
"I'll go check then. Good night, if I don't see you again today.">Spike's already started pulling the pile apart and cleaning the pieces>"Alright, see you tomorrow!">you walk back up to your room, having finally figured out how to get there without getting lost>time to see what you have to do before tomorrow>as far as you can tell from searching through papers, nothing>oh well>looking over at your bed, you suddenly feel the weight of the day's events hit you and you're instantly wiped>you decide to check your phone for the time>10:30, that's pretty late for a school night!>you can hear your mom yelling at you across dimensions to go to bed>frig off mom, you're not here!>I bet Twilight wouldn't care if I stayed up this late!>now that you're done with your imaginary argument with your mom, you crawl in next to your Aryanne and go to sleep
>>117576>He fell for the dissection meme
Obviously CAT scans and X-Rays are a much better option. High quality imagery without the need to dissect, and you still have your visitor
at the end of the day.
>>117576>>you do manage to get it after trying to put it on like a cape first and laying on your back to tie it
that's cute and hot at the same time, pic of this when
either I can make an MSpaint attempt, or you can wait for an artfag to do it.
what a fucking plebi wish i had it to join you
>>117600>replying directly to spoilers
what are you, a faggot?I'm just sitting on a server doing boring shit, it's not really that interesting.
well maybe i like boring shitalso you can't stop me fag
then pay the 20 dollars and download sky factory 3, then we can start talking.I'm literally just running in circles waiting for shit to spawn so I can kill it and get exp
You set the letter aside once more. It was good to know what Lyra was up to, though you kind of wonder how she's going to make it on her own. She may have the mind of an adult, but she still has the body of a filly. Surely, there may be some unscrupulous characters running around in Manehatten, right?
But that's a problem for another day. For now, you're still not tired. Purple must not be either, seeing as she's not yet come down to bed. Obviously, a remedy will need to be found.
You walk upstairs to find most of the family sitting around reading. Seems they must have all thought to bring at least one book. Ascending the stairs to Cadance and Shining's room (or alcove really, seeing as it doesn't have four walls, or a door), you find the two snuggled up in bed, reading some sort of book together. Clearly the perfect time to capture their attention with an adorable filly stare.
<"What's up, Anon?"
"Cadance, can you tell me a story?"
<"Hmm… possibly. Let me see if I can think of a good one."
A smile creeps up on Shiny's face.
>>"I could tell you a story. It's super scary and full of monsters."
>>117621>implying Lyra doesn't want to be brutally fucked by a big strong male
My only regret is that I can't give her what she wants.
Let's hear Shiny's story then.>"Is it about the spooky ghost that haunts your room every time Cadance is over?"[ 1d100 = 40 ]
>>117623>by a big strong male >My only regret is that I can't give her what she wants.
you'd never be able to anyways____________________:^)____________________
Let's go with Armor's story, but ask if it's just a retelling of the events of the past few days. [ 1d100 = 80 ]
fuck yoouuu, nigggggeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrr>>117629
Look guy, there is of course a place for loving, sensual sex. I'd spend more time with filly than you could believe. But filly needs to be fucked. She wants to be fucked. You understand?That's odd. I attached an image and it didn't show up.
Oh Anon… If you were the little filly…
Ah shit, I didn't forget about you either Anon. I'd you too.
not without dinner you aren't.
Anon, stop. I'm too obstinate to back out of this.
tendies and wine will suffice, otherwise you can find another filly. i'm not gonna be a slut
Tendies and wine it is then, you silly filly. I'm going to think about you now, you know. I asked you to stop, but you wouldn't listen. You little faggot.
I'm going the fuck to bed.
Combine the two.[ 1d100 = 29 ]