I was molested by a Jew as a child. I always thought it was my fault. Later in childhood I got into a sexual relationship with one of my cousins that went on for years, she blackmailed me to keep it going.
I haven’t seen either of those people in years and I’ve been horrified at the prospect a relationship ever since, and guilt shame and impotent rage haunt me to this day. You're the first faggots I’ve ever told this to.
>>110847 You're not the sinner here, anon, at least not in any way close to those perverts. Sexual abuse in childhood can blind you from recognizing right and wrong.
I can't recommend enough finding a therapist, as long as it's one without the parentheses, because childhood trauma will always be a burden and you need what help you can get. Regardless of whether you're religious, know that God still loves you regardless of your past. Hopefully you can find peace in church.
>>110853 Thank you anon. As for the therapist I’m kinda looking for a nice natsoc one now, don’t want to be bogged down with endless why are you a nazi questions. Same goes for a church for that matter.
(((They))) took my foreskin against my mother's wishes after I was born. The Jew doctor couldn't even do it right and left it half-attached until it came off one day as my mom was changing my diaper.
>>110871 You don't understand, Anon. It irrevocably kiked me for life. Until I was 18 I unironically said "Oy vey!" without even knowing that it was (((them))) who invented the term.
I have something that has always made me hate myself and has only continued to grow over the years. Around 12-13 when I was first starting to go through puberty I moved to a new area and made friends with the neighbor's kids there was a girl that was about a year younger than me that I had a huge crush on. One day we were playing around just talking and all and they decided to play house so I decided fuck it i'll play just to spend time with friends (I had never had neighbors before or anyone around I have always grown up without any friends around) and we layed down for a second and I accidentally started dry humping her (fully clothed) and immediately stopped after realizing what I was doing and was immediately disgusted with myself and went home. The parents contacted mine at some point within the next week and I had to lie to cover up anything in fear that my parents would disown me and I would never see them again. I never played with them ever again and was despised to this day I have never told anyone and it plays a large roll on my self loathing and disgust for myself.
>>110942 The important thing is you stop and even have regrets because you know you done wrong, but more importantly, stop beating yourself up about the past hormones make you do some crazy thing
I jerk off to traps and visit /d/ often :( I'm lazy and I know it. I avoid giving medical assistance to people because I hate working with others in that way and also think they're being bitches, even though its my job.
>>111192 If it is a benefit, then its not a disorder. What you're describing is a schizo-typal personality. Disorder suggests mal-effect, self destruction/obstruction, or other induced consequential situation.
>>111192 I actually think I might have the same thing. Some anon on here was talking about it a few months back so I looked it up, and it describes me a little too perfectly.
>>111200 There is a discussion about it, whenever it is actually a disorder or not. I don't see any downsides related to that, but can a mad man judge his own sanity?
>>111221 It’s a mirror symptom that can get progressively worst were you form an agoraphobic & Anthropophobia and that’s a very difficult symptom to get rid of had it for 6 years and still hard to get out side
>>111221 We live in an era where it's no longer even considered a disorder to want to put on a skirt and hack your own dick off. I say if you're satisfied with yourself and can manage your own life without external support, and your behavior doesn't make you a danger to anyone else, there's really no reason you should be compelled to seek treatment for something you don't consider to be a problem.
I'm un-ironically into bestiality. Not just furry, but full, non-spaient animals. Further, only canines or their cousins, really. Dogs, wolves, foxes, etc. I want a Siberian Husky one day. I'll never follow through on this degeneracy, never try anything with her, but I might always love her a bit too much.
It's made me honestly wonder why fetishes develop in the first place. There's the beginnings of a theory, but that's another topic entirely.
I've fapped to a lot of homo shit and other things that make me question my life when I finish I've managed to stop most of it, but every while I end up going back to it I want to stop but I'm not sure how to start I probably need help
>>111369 Do ponies even count as a fetish anymore? It feels like they're just people at this point. Furries will never get this, because they don't have proper, agreed upon characters, and structure, with good character to them.
>>111372 Not from there, but what else would you expect on a board dedicated to degenerate deviancy?
>>111367 >>111368 Step one is identifying the problem. Find the solution. Whatever you do though, never carry out your fetish in real life. You will regret it.
>>111379 >Do ponies even count as a fetish anymore? Yes. Most normal people do not want to bang a quadruped. It's better than wanting to fuck a dog at least though.
>>110814 I still refuse to bring myself to watch the show. I watched the first episode, but one major problem i have is that i cannot fucking stand babyvoice.
>>110814 I used to be a communist before I went to 4chan, feminism, liberal values, all that sick shit. Thankfully I got the fag slapped out of me and I'm alright now.
I have some pretty sick fetishes, most of which I've been trying to kick because they always made me feel disgusted with myself for even having them. My boner refuses to co-operate.
I sometimes wish I was circumcised because having a foreskin can be such a bother sometimes. You ever gone to the toilet and had to worry about whether your piss would fly sideways? I do. Frequently.
I never ever had a male role model in my life, period, I was raised almost entirely around women and the only one who maybe could have qualified was my grandfather who was like a prehistoric 4channer.
The daycare I was often left at because my career driven autistic single mother had no time for us was pretty much run by a socialist feminist liberal who, I've come to realise years later, was running social experiments and indoctrinating me and the other boys into being beta nu-males. She was christian to boot, and as evidenced by my first confession I bought into that crap.
I'm a pretty pathetic excuse for a man, socially crippled, anxiety issues, I used to have a steady job but had to drop it because my mum stuck me with my autistic brother and I get more money from government gibs being his "carer" than I would if I were still in the workforce. It's a flimsy excuse and sometimes I wonder if I shouldn't just end it all, but the only two things that stop me is that this is what the jews would want and that my two nieces need some kind of father figure in their life to teach them right from wrong where their deadbeat fathers (my sister turned out to be a thot, but she's getting better) won't, I've been wrong, and I'm trying to be right. I don't want them to let the ills of society ruin them as they've ruined so many others.
Oh and I like My Little Pony and masturbate to it frequently. Still want to be a better person for her, and for my own sake.
>>110847 I was duped into having a sexual relationship with my sister at 8 like some fucking nipponese doujin, we still talk, but we don't talk about that, or acknowledge it happened at all.
>>111520 >I sometimes wish I was circumcised because having a foreskin can be such a bother sometimes. You ever gone to the toilet and had to worry about whether your piss would fly sideways? I do. Frequently. I have same problem, And considering getting circumcised then I think the Jews win
>Oh and I like My Little Pony and masturbate to it frequently. Still want to be a better person for her, and for my own sake. That’s basically /mlpol/
>I'm a pretty pathetic excuse for a man, socially crippled, anxiety issues, I used to have a steady job but had to drop it because my mum stuck me with my autistic brother and I get more money from government gibs Same my brother can get on centerlink for his disability and I’m worse and they won’t give me a cent
>I have some pretty sick fetishes If something gay read this >>111384
>>111520 >>111546 >having a foreskin can be such a bother sometimes Just pull back the foreskin slightly each time you urinate. It's second-nature to me now.
Imagine trying to masturbate without a foreskin. What a pain. No wonder they do things like buy lube and bad dragon toys.
>>111567 That molestation I don’t care what people say or think, but that’s molestation your sister doesn’t talk about it because she disgusted by herself and you may don't think it’s big of a deal about it, but shit scars people in the long run and it explains everything about you from what you have written, tell your parent and then tell police because what she did was wrong action have consequences
Another Anon that was molested as a child reporting in. By an older cousin and something I still haven't told anyone about. Not my family, friends or my therapist. I'm not particularly traumatized or anything but it's still very uncomfortable being near him. Even if I did want to say something though I don't know if I would. I doubt he even remembers it and I wouldn't want to ruin his life years after the fact.
I don't like mlp. I'm a bit more tolerant about it after finding out about the /mlpol/ story. Also, I got a kick out of /pone/ on 8chan being the prototype /mlpol/ a few years ago. Steven Universe and Rick and Morty ended up being something a lot more cancerous and degenerate than mlp, while mlp became more conservative. This also had an effect on me being a lot more tolerant towards mlp. I like it here. Peaceful, I think there are good people here too.
Dunno about the molestation as a kid, but my dad tried to stab me as a kid and always blamed me for it, even when I bring it up to him as an adult. "I did it to discipline you/just to scare you that's all, because you were running around and being fucking stupid!" Chink parenting. I wasn't running around, he started to yell at me in the car for some reason, like screaming at me infront of my mom and sister at the top of his lungs. Thing is, the parents and family knew I was born with mental problems, but they kept on beating me and stuff.
Let me tell you, incidents like those are why you going to see a lot of Chinese/Asians wanting to race mix, because of the absolute fucking trauma they endured by their parents/relatives. They don't want to be associated with people of the same race and feel ashamed to be a part of that race. Even if they do know race mixing is bad, they are just completely traumatized by those bad experiences, they want to be with someone that doesn't look like or will remind them of those people.
Personally, I know race mixing is bad and I don't want to become hypocritical by race mixing, but...You know I can't stand other Chinese around 99% of the time and I don't want to be with any of those girls. They're pretty fucking vicious too. Go with Korean girl? No, they're fucking stupid and THOTs, and it's still race mixing. Go with Japanese? Would be nice to go with the honorary Aryans, but...race mixing, and the Nips hate us. I just want a nice white girl with a nice voice, common sense, conservative values. I hope I can find a nice white girl, that girl of my dreams. I just know that if I get that, I can finally get that feeling of peace, that feeling that everything will be alright again. Another reason why I don't want to marry another Chinese: I don't want to end up like my dad and regret "marrying the wrong woman and not leaving her and the entire family when I had the chance." I do promise, if I end up with a nice white girl, I'll do anything to help traditional white couples. By marrying a white girl, I reduce the chance of the white race being able to reproduce and keep itself pure, so I feel obligated to help them out. I took something valuable and precious away from them, I must give back to show graditutde and not be like a nigger who always demand free shit for nothing.
>>111567 >>111657 Please stop feeling sorry for your abuser because they sure as shit don’t because if they did, they would turn themselves in, I really fucking hate this, please speak up because I know people who just like you who don’t speak up and they kill themselves and that fuck shit is kills me inside and piece of shit who started this whole mess walks away Scot free and not know the damage their action caused
>>111693 I don’t know how to feel about this you seem like a nice fella but I’m against race mixing but if you find love and I hope you do I hope you’re definitely traditional and you treat her right, but when comes to your father and his method of discipline it might be how they were raised, it could be worse my father & brother beat the shit out of me and my brother suck a gun to my head but that’s tough love and that’s how they were taught
>>111693 > I know race mixing is bad and I don't want to become hypocritical by race mixing, but… I understand you completely. I'm a spic and I will never admit it to anyone and I try really hard to look white. Like I wear a hood and sun screen whenever I go outside just to try and not make my skin tan. It works fairly well and I look like a normal white but my spic name sorta gives it away still. Part of me sorta wants to change it but I really don't fell like changing who I am for that reason. When people ask I just say I'm Spanish. But it sucks because I'd love to have a family but I absolutely don't want to increase the amount of nonwhites in this country because le 56%. Part of me sorta accepts that because of this I'm a genetic dead end but another half of me really would like a family especially kids. But that would either require race mixing or just flat out increasing the spic population, neither of which I'm a fan of.
Damn thinking about this just gets me depressed to begin with.
>>111705 I wonder how many people are actually white here kek, But in all seriousness if you fight and help to make a white ethnostate I think you deserve a Honorary Aryan status and allow to have a white bride
>>111705 You're not a genetic dead end if you're smart enough to be thinking like you are. One of the main causes of the global decline of white population is that they thought themselves out of reproduction. Far more important to this planet than white people are smart people.
>>111708 Evidence that the jew has harmed many races. It's proof that they just view the gentiles as cattle (goyim). Although they should keep harming niggers, because niggers are horrible people and a race war between the two would benefit everyone else.
>>111711 Define smart. What defines "smart" always changes with the times and what can be defined as "smart" is always changed by those with enough influence. Look at the SJW that is being spread due to "intellectuals."
>>111702 Wasn't tough love. Dad had a lot of emotional problems of his own and he just took it out on the family/others even if they didn't do anything. Fun example: Dad has a bad day at work, he decides to make me do math questions cause to "make me smart." I have trouble understanding a question, and he fucking sucks at explaining things and just yells at you. I don't understand and do a question wrong, he fucking starts yelling and screaming at me and calls me stupid, etc. He can't stand up to strangers/people, he just bows to them then takes it out on me and my sister as a kid, because we were easy targets for him. Also, he is hardcore communist/liberal and always contradicts himself. Even when I'm not doing anything, he would just bring up something insulting to me out of the blue, like he knew I liked pro wrestling and when I was like just lying down/resting and reading something, he would randomly come up to me and say how fake it was and how stupid I was. Then when I get mad at him for bringing it up and knowing it was fake he was like "WHY YOU SO MAD!? YOU JUST HAD TO SAY NO!" then yell and swear at me in Chinese. Essentially he starts fights as well. Honestly, one of the few times I had peace was when he was in the hospital due to a massive heart attack. Even mom said the place was so quiet and peaceful.
>>111707 >wonder how many people are actually white here kek /pol/ itself is about 60-80% on any given day, and you need to recall this is taking into account all the nonwhites in nonwhite countries. I'd say /mlp/ is slightly less white overall but doubt that's been polled. I'd say we're around 70-90% just because I haven't heard anyone claim to be anything else before this. >>111717 >>111708 Jewyork is an especially bad sample. Still the nonwhites could have at least had the decency of not showing up.
Part of me also hopes The Promised Day is real. I saw that screen grab with the get, but didn't save it.
My reasoning is if I'm not meant to be with a white girl, then I hope for The Promised Day with waifu. I'll consider it a good reward to my contribution in creating a white ethnostate. Plus our kind doesn't get to reproduce while the whites can reproduce.
>>111719 > he is hardcore communist Well that right there is a mental disability
I’m sorry though to hear your father being a massive cunt, when it came to my father he would always find away to Teach me a lesson by either physical pain or emotional pain to make me stronger even if I hated it, but in end I know he loves me P.s homeschooled
>>111693 > I hope I can find a nice white girl, that girl of my dreams. I just know that if I get that, I can finally get that feeling of peace, that feeling that everything will be alright again. You have to treat your problems before getting a relationship anon, the girl of your dreams is not going to fix your inner problems, it is very unlikely. A relationship is supposed to make your good life even better, if you have some deep problems and look for a relationship to fix them, its going to fall like a house of cards. Take it or leave it, i speak for experience.
>>111705 Don't eat the genetic dead end propaganda, that's bullshit, just find a spic girl that has some nice genes to reproduce and raise some intelligent children. If the smart latinos keep dying and the dumb ones keep reproducing we will end up exactly like the niggers, a bunch of brainless, violent savages.
Find a spic girl with some nice genes, reproduce and raise some educated, intelligent children. Improve the race, don't off yourself if your genes are good.
>>110814 I'm not interested in humans anymore, I never was into girls too much, when my friends treated sex and relationships as something important I never really found any interest int it. At this point I'm only into ponies.
I don't want to have kids. I just don't like them, I find whole idea repulsive, only thing stopping me from vasectomy is that my attitude would change in future.
I find that whole white race thing silly ,amybe it's because I'm from country where there are almost only whities, but I met a lot of utterly shitty white people, and all few niggs and chinks that I met were pretty decent people. At this point I would gladly accept intelligent, hard working niggnog, faggot, tranny or whatever over shitty, straight whitey. I accept differences between races, I just dont think that few percentage points means anythign in real world aside from statistics.
>>111744 If you're not a shill, reconsider your stance. You don't have to be a Chad to recognize that traditional marriage is the bedrock of civilization.
Know that there are only three paths in life: the married man with children, the clergy, and unmarried laity. If you choose the last you must have a valid excuse beyond a vague asexuality. You should devote your life to something that has clear benefit to the Church, to your people, and to your nation (something akin to C.S. Lewis, for example, who had no descendants yet greatly helped Western civilization).
Also, statistics are important. Why do you think that Europeans and their descendants as well as East Asians have the most prosperous, powerful nations? Of course the foreigners you have met are nice, hardworking people because strict immigration allows only those kind of people: the cream of the crop. Open the floodgates and you'll see how those "differences" translate.
>>111719 Sorry to hear that but I doubt yours is a typical place. There are a bunch of garbage white parents too and you can find stories on this site.
Even so, culture may play a part. I may be mistaken, but as someone who lives in China the Asian parenting style is quite different. The father usually relegates parenting to the mother and other relatives while he does his hardest to support the family monetarily. There are benefits but as a result the child is lacking in part of development as close fatherly support is very helpful. Also, usually the father is stoic, as the culture expects him to be, and exercises influence in a context-high setting. Most people in China generally stay out of politics outside of paying lip service to the Communist Party.
I'm hoping you don't race-mix but find a nice Chinese girl (they're not hard to find if you speak the language). It sounds like you got the short-end of the parenting stick but you can make up for it in other ways.
>>111705 Again, don't be ashamed of your race. We may be white nationalists here but it doesn't mean we actively hate other races (except perhaps the Jews). We only want to be left alone and it is your responsibility to improve. That won't happen as long as long as you saddle yourself with guilt (which is what SJWs do to us). There are plenty of good Hispanics about and, if you find a lady with similar values, you'll do your race a service by improving it overall. Attitude ultimately matters more than genetics.
Im still messed up from a breakup over 5 years ago. She blamed me for not loving her but in reality she just wanted to move out of our home town. The topic was never brought up by her and wasn't even on my radar as I had one year left of uni. Weeks after the breakup and being led on she jumped into bed with a friends relative from out of town which basically isolated me from my group of friends for a time. They only told me what was going on after seeing photos of them all partying with her. They ended up cutting ties with her but deep down I don't know how it would have turned out if she didn't move away. I have never really forgiven them for their part in the fiasco. Now I genuinely find it difficult to get close to people, even family. Im glad she is out of my life now and I still got my shit together but I hate myself so damn much that this shit still gets me down.
I have no idea why I want to be here. I'm not "alt-right," fascist, or an ancap. I don't really want to gas all the Jews. I don't view race mixing as an inherently bad thing. I don't even care about the gays that much, but agree their actions should probably be curtailed. I also have strong doubts about religion.
Yet I still keep coming here. I post in threads, I make threads, I've even made shity recolors. I've been here since last April, and check this site regularly several times a day. I'm here right now on mobile for instance. It confuses me why I desire to be here, when I disagree with most of you so much.
The problem is that the consequences will seriously fuck her kids lives up more than they already are, and I'm making a conscious effort to try to make sure they make it through childhood and adolescence to be decent people. I'm certain she deeply regrets much of her behaviour over the years, as she's making attempts to be a better person as well for the sake of her kids if nothing else. Kicking up dust and dragging the skeletons out of the closet helps no one, least of all me because my sister may have sexually abused me, but she was practically the only member of my immediate family who cared about me in any capacity, what with my brother and mother being autistic shitheels with serious temper issues which were often set loose on me and my father being the ultimate deadbeat, they did more damage to me than she ever did.
>>111693 Reminder that white/asiatic racemixing produces an unironically superior genetic result, while wide scale racemixing should be abhorred and fought against, it's perfectly manageable in smaller amounts. The big problem with racemixing against whites is that there is no white ethnostate and no immigration control to maintain a semblance of racial purity. Say for example you did take a white wife and racemix with her, in an ideal white ethnostate, your offspring's genetics would be majority white again in two to three generations. So really, just support lower immigration, that would be a massive help towards basically every facet of life in a given state.
>>111782 While i dont approve of race- mixing in General, AryanxNippon is a pretty based ad mixture. As long as you dont let the mother tiger mommy the child they could be an asset in the up coming Reich.
>>111783 As long as whatever racemixing happens is properly counterbalanced, its perfectly fine, as someone said earlier, basically everyone should have a drop at this point, however miniscule. Inter-generational and systemic racemixing is what we have to watch out for, that's the stuff the destroys a people.
>>111771 Because you desperately wish to fit in somewhere. Your eyes have seen the truth and you can no longer run from it. Though you still deny it and pretend everything is okay.
>>111771 >I'm not "alt-right" I never fully understood what that was myself >fascist Fascism isn't as horrible and bad as people have been taught over the last 70 years, it's pretty much just devoting yourself to your people and your country, which is a good thing if the ruler is benevolent and a bad thing if they are not. >Ancap Roads! >Jews You should, though, or at the very least want to put them all into a pen from behind which they can't interact with the rest of the world at all >Race mixing It's not if controlled, too much of anything is bad and right now it's too much >Gays They should keep it behind closed doors and not demand change of society to cater to them, they really need to stop being a petri dish for disease to be honest >Religion Well sure, a lot of it has been corrupted and subverted. Even if you don't believe, and I don't, there's no denying that there's some good stuff in there. Faith is a good thing, too much faith is not.
Sometimes I think a lot of it is satire, when we say we want to gas the jews, what we really want is for them to just go away and stop their subversive crap forever. They won't though, so gas.
>>111771 I am also not alt-right, fascist, or ancap. The alt-right is social and spiritual poison, ancap is what permitted George Soros to make his billions by plundering small economies with currency manipulation (the international money market is anarcho-capitalist), and fascism is incompatible with my valuing free speech above all else.
I am here only because I am anti-left, and I find some of the extreme positions posited here disappointing, to say the least.
>>110814 I lost my virginity when i was 8y/o to a boy on my neighbourhood, i don't even know if that counts since i didn't even know what i was doing and we where both the same age, yet the memory is still on my mind. That caused a big hit on my sexuality, all my life i punished myself for thinking about sex with men, only when i turned 20 i realized why did i have those unwanted thoughts in the first place.
All these abused anons. Jeez my family was great and I still love my parents. Only crime they did was be liberal, not promote sports and allow my brother to become gay. Instead of sports I got classical music training and history. I don't agree with it but he at least is a productive member and doesn't act like a fag. Any anons have a normal family?
>>112142 No. Not really. He was a reform capitalist with a sense that monopoly's had to be reigned in for consumers while ensuring a square deal with the businessmen along the way. Roosevelt was a conservationist as well that bought tracks of land to remain natural and untainted by industrialist use. Often he busted trusts with some consideration and provided new regulations with the same attitude. Roosevelt's presidency sought out more trade deals that reduced tariffs towards some countries, but nonetheless it was leverage at times and he possibly didn't have too much of an anti-tariff attitude neither. He was a moderate progressive for his time. Probably not natcap.
>>112142 He wasn't. Roosevelt can be considered a prototype of progressives and neo-cons. He extended government power in the interest of "making people's lives better" and was pro-war to the hilt. A capitalist would limit the government's power and a nationalist would be mostly isolationist in foreign policy.
>>112294 > i didn't even know what i was doing and we where both the same age, Well I’m sorry for it appears I miss interpreter what you wrote, I’m sorry
There are some pretty fugged up stories here, but a common thread that I'm seeing here is that in most of these, the fault is not on the anons.
Now for a confession of something that actually is my fault, and an incoming blog post:
For a little while (maybe a year), I was buying escorts on the regular, I only stopped because I wanted to save money to buy a car, I was also afraid one of these bitches was going to try to call the cops on me and accuse me of rape or pull some sort of shit like that, and I was also concerned about my health. In fact, there was one time where there was a blood drive in my hometown that was organized by my mother. There was a questionnaire I had to complete, and one of the questions was "have you paid for sex at any time in the past year?", or something like that, and of course, I answered it honestly as it was only a little over a month since I did that. When I went into the booth to have an interview with the doctor they told me that I wasn't allowed to donate because of the risk of disease. Of course, I lied to my mother and told her I was exhibiting flu like symptoms and they didn't want to risk extracting my blood (Hema Quebec is very strict with donations). That was scary.
Even scarier than that, less than a couple of weeks after that, I came down with a really bad cold, and it lasted for a couple of weeks. One of my co-workers suggested that I may have had something serious if it was lasting this long. I thought that I had actually caught The Germ.
Why was I doing all this shit in the first place? To make a very long story short, I grew a disdain for women and fell for MGTOW propaganda after being burned in the dating game (both in the struggle to get a date and when I finally got a date). I guess I was also doing it out of spite for feminists and leftists, hell, even at this point I'm pretty misogynistic.
Still, I know I'm contributing to the world's ills, if the Death Korps of Krieg actually was a thing, I'd be joining up to atone for my sins (I have quite a bit to fess up to, but this is the big thing I have to confess).
>>112399 >f the Death Korps of Krieg actually was a thing, I'd be joining up to atone for my sins Same here >I thought that I had actually caught The Germ So all clean I guess
>>112399 > I grew a disdain for women and fell for MGTOW propaganda Pussies going full retard (MGTOW) is as silly as it gets man, i feel sorry you fell for that meme. You are not spitting on anyone's face by fucking prostitutes, you are just wasting money and energy that you could be spending on better things.
>>111727 I actually saved the screen grab. Part of me still hopes of The Promised Day. If no real girl/3dpd, I hope waifu.
Quads in the screen grab says promised day. Along with the issues with parenting and other family issues, I got burned a lot by my now ex-gfs. It's always liars, cheaters, psycho bitches, dumb cunts, or all of the above. Even the "Good Christian girls" are fuckin' thots.
>>111520 >I sometimes wish I was circumcised because having a foreskin can be such a bother sometimes. I bet you also had your glands removed. REEEEEEE If there is one single reason, which I agree on with typical pidorashkas here, to despise western society - It is shit like this. An unnecessary and plainly dumb ivasive manupilations with organs which *apparently* serve no purpose, despite that they fucking DO.
>>112850 As for confession... Well, sometimes when I want some of dat booty and my woman tells me she is not in the mood or some other bullshit, I just demonstratively get to my PC and openly fap to ponies. I think she looses a bit of her sanity each time I do that, but the only thing I feel is a weird satisfaction, as if absolute justice has been just delivered.
>>112406 I am indeed fucking sorry (although I can't make any guarantee that I won't relapse)
As for who I fugged, the very first chick I ever bought appeared to be white, and she told me she was Persian (if she was telling the truth, if she really is a descendant of these ancient aryans, then it's a damn shame how low she has fallen. Especially considering that the second time I saw her a big smelly negro came marching down the stairs of the apartment complex she stayed at, I was thinking he was either a customer or, God forbid, her pimp). Most of the others I've bought were Chinese and Korean, with a couple of blacks and she-spics in the mix.
>>112409 Thankfully I am clean, but even after my cold passed I was still going around all scared and suicidal thinking I had gotten pozzed up until my last physical with my doctor. Later I had come to realize that I didn't have all that much to worry about, considering that female to male HIV transmission is very difficult (but male to female transmission is very easy, which is one of the reasons sex work is so dangerous for women).
While I'm on that subject, if I can make another confession, I found out that Backpage in my region has transsexual escorts on offer. As tempting as it was for me, the only reason I haven't dived right in was because I was deathly afraid of catching HIV.
>>112457 I won't lie, I still sympathize with those that are MGTOW, they do definitely have a point when they cite gynocentrism is a major problem in our society. But I will agree the MGTOW movement in itself is not the be all, end all solution to the problem.
>>111520 >You ever gone to the toilet and had to worry about whether your piss would fly sideways? I do. Frequently. Why do you guys seriously not know how to piss? You push the foreskin back, enough to show the urethra, then you take the piss.
I hate the alt-right. I hate racial consciousness. Jordan Peterson is spot-on that the notion of group identity is "seriously pathological ... reprehensible ... genocidal" and "it will bring down our civilization if we pursue it." The problem is it's the goddamn Nash equilibrium.
>>113022 >Freedom means Freedom for the Group, not Freedom for the Individual. (…) Men must not be slaves to other men, but they must be slaves to their group. For, if they are not slaves to their own group, they will assuredly become slaves to some other - Liang Qichao I do not want to be in a collective, and hate collective thought. However, to safeguard our individual liberties we must work collectively. There is only so much one person can do.
>>112906 >I found out that Backpage in my region has transsexual escorts on offer Frist of all that’s gay, second of all you’re falling down the slippery slope, I mean seriously, why do people want to fuck an open wound and if you want a girl with a dick then I’m sorry I have to say you’re gay
>>113022 >>113023 This reminds me of evolution. Evolution takes small components and builds larger structures, life is an example. Each human is a subcomponent of a evolutionary larger structure that nature is mindlessly trying to achieve. The problem here is these subcomponents, each human, has a independent brain and keeps rebelling against the unification nature mindlessly pushes. I am not expecting a change until technology can achieve total control over the masses.
>>113022 >listening to mr.clean your room unironically anon, grow the fuck up. I don't know if you didn't have a father figure to tell you to sort yourself out growing up but jordan isn't doing/saying anything all that important. In fact more than anything his whole persona is just an ad campaign he's perpetuating to make a shit ton of money off people like you
>>113028 >Being as bad as Cathy Neumann in misrepresenting him Peterson is a brilliant scholar. I respect him for his proper identification and analysis of postmodernism and collectivist neo-Marxism in academia, the politburo of the hard left.
>>113028 I am still appalled by how much of a flamboyant moron you are. Peterson is a scholar and professor; I love his university lectures. I am simply appalled by your obstreperous self-assured idiocy. My God, thinking people are stupid for educating themselves by listening to his university lectures.
>>113051 Of course, and he talks about them. It's just seriously wrong to dismiss a serious scholar as vacuous. Seriously wrong. Peterson is a knowledgeable expert.
My God. >>113028 is such an idiot. Definitely one of the most infuriatingly stupid cretins I've encountered, infuriating because his idiotic narrative is pernicious. Postmodernism, intersectionality, Nietzsche, Dostoyevsky, Derrida, he talks about so much with such factual expertise! And you dismiss this expert scholar with condescending disdain! I have never, ever encountered levels of pernicious, poisoning-the-well over-the-top hubris like yours. You're like a literal savage brute in how gregariously arrogantly stupid you are.
>>111770 >...shit still gets me down after 5 years You know you should be glad the bitch is out of your life, and you must know she didn't love you(you just described a Thot), but if you still feel bad for her leaving, it's maybe because you failed to learn something about that relationship, something important, and that is haunting you from your unconscious mind, preventing you from advancing in life. >Have never really forgiven my friends Now this is a sin, and may just be what is getting you down! Don't blame your friends when a thot is at fault, they are not perfect, neither are you, and they redeemed for that by saying the magic words BEGONE THOT. What more could you ask for? >About sadness Here is a protip, when you feel down, sad or even depressed, it's your mind telling you something is wrong and you either lost or risk loosing something, and it's a command to stop and think, to rework your life, your actions, your world view. This is why sadness is a low energy state. If someone you care dies, it's natural to feel down, you have to rearrange your entire mind, and life, just to update the fact that person is dead and gone. And denial/diversion only makes the feel persist.
>>113159 You can always change, Anon. If my father gave up after the first time he was divorced I would not be around.
>>112906 Congratulations, your Deadly Sin is lust. Better start there.
>>112942 Stop playing into Southern stereotypes, anon.
>>113022 Do you love your own family, anon? Do you love members of your family more than outsiders? If so, it's no crime then to prefer people of your own heritage and race. Murdoch Murdoch of all things offers a good explanation.
Don't get me wrong, Jordan Peterson is a genius and is right on most things, but no one is perfect. Until the day comes when everyone is as enlightened and virtuous as he, then some measure of collectivism is necessary for self-preservation.
>>113052 What is Mr. Perov's philosophy, precisely?
>>113073 Max Stirner is a better philosopher than Diogenes.
>>113426 You resent them for not existing, and fantasizing about hurting them is just one of the many things you can fantasize about when you're dealing with fictional characters too good for you.
I've jacked off to MLP characters over the years so often, jacking off to actual photographs of human women feels exotic now. Like I'm a dirty little human who wants mediocre human pussy and hairless human flesh.
>>111520 YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO PULL THE SKIN ON YOUR COCK BACKWARDS, THEN PISS, YOU FUCKING FAGGOT. DIDN'T YOUR PARENTS TEACH YOU ANYTHING?
>>113444 No, broken household, and my mother was autistic. The only thing she was interested in teaching me was to do exactly what she said, exactly how she said it, exactly when she said it and exactly what to think. She tried to coerce me into voting the same as her as well. My dad's a deadbeat who still lives with his mother at age 54.
I'm a mixed person who has mixed parents and some days I just don't see the point in doing anything. I know I should do something but I just can't seem to find a reason to do it. As for why I'm here,I kinda stumbled upon it and now I feel as though I know the truth about how the world really works. So I usually see what info I can gather from here and I really love the show and what it ACTUALLY stands for. Pic related when I realized I haven't done anything productive all day.
>>113613 I was having the same problem a while ago. Just find a project within the community you can throw your autism into. If you obligate and have the pressure that others are looking forward to your goal then you'll become super efficient and work real hard only on that one thing.
>>113426 M8, you had better be Mormon or Muslim (and even then, only Shia and Alawi are acceptable denominations) if you're going to be sporting two waifus there, Bill.
>>113613 Anon being mixed raced doesn't mean you don't have purpose. The next best identity to fight for after Race is Nationality. Instead of fighting for your race, you could fight for your American brothers.
>>113951 Well it's depends on how much canvas you give the references tbh. For example if you have like a downtown city scene,you could covertly put in about 50 without it getting obnoxious Also that's not mine but I do some photo editing from time to time.
I've been a NEET for one year, I do know what I want to do with my life ( mexicunt chair force) But I feel I don't have the strenght of spirit to leave my family behind If I stay, I feel like I failed them for not being the best man I can be If I go, I feel like shit for not being there
I was molested as a colt at a friends house, my dad wanted to go out partying and left me at a friends house. Little did my father know that my friends mom was a heroin junkie and sold my friend's ass for dope.
I happened to be there the night he was coming by and she was passed out with a needle between her toes. He made me watch at first then he made me and my friend play "The naked game" where we basically sucked each other and fondled his balls a bit. Luckily I never had to suck his dick myself, my friend always did so I didn't have to because I was 4 years younger at the time.
Anyway he wound up molesting me for several years and I in turn wound up molesting other neighborhood kids. I never realized what I was doing was wrong I just assumed that's what older boys did to younger boys. I didn't realize how bad my actions were until I was about 15, when I found out what homosexuals were.
My worst crime is when I was 14 I took advantage of a young 7-8 year old kid I was supposed to be getting paid to babysit. Now I'm eternally haunted imagining all the kids who have grown up, secretly hating me and wanting revenge for the innocence I stole from them. I'm so goddamn sorry
>>114422 >I was molested as a colt I’m not sure you’re telling the truth when you started like this, but if you’re telling the truth, kill yourself in all seriousness kill yourself, your actions deserve death, I don’t care if my molester was molested because he should know the damage it does and pain it causes to someone mind and body and family so fucking shoot yourself
>>114426 YOU are a sicker fuck. We accept childhood trauma and apologies. If this guy is legit, he went through Hell, and has frequent flyer miles with his own conscience. Pure definition of reticence and forgiveness.
>>114426 No, just no. In this case he's not responsible for his actions. The harm was very real, but he did not realize it and had been messed up by others to act that way. He now feels genuine guilt and wishes to atone. Save your vitriol for the real pedophiles who who have no regrets and are repeat offenders: these ones get the gas.
>>114422 God will forgive you if you suitably repent. I'd recommend therapy but, well, we know what happens to people who actually recognize they need help. Healthy activities, frequent prayer, and positive relationships will help you.
I wonder how many pedophiles are that way because they had been molested? It really seems like a chain reaction.
>>114548 He does have an obligation if he remembers the identity of the victims, but if he's forgotten there's nothing he can do except make up for it in community service. It would be extremely difficult to walk up to someone and say, "Sorry for molesting you as a kid, I had no idea what I was doing." Still, the obligation is there.
Seriously, though, there needs to be a society to help these poor souls.
>>114477 Thanks Anon today I discovered that there's a pilot school in the Navy, and that's just 3 hours from my hometown! I'm currently preparing physically for the admission test
Alright, I've had this all my life but I rarely talk about it. It will be hard for me to explain all of it in a brief detail but here it goes. I am basically a slave to my mother.
My mom has a shit ton of conditions, she has arthritis and has had hip and knee replacements, Lyme disease, severe depression, possibly bipolar disorder but I don't know about that one. So when she needs something done, she calls for my dad, my sister, and me to do it. This is the problem though, she really does not plan things out and she makes us do these big projects around the house that usually end up in disaster and creates other big projects to fix in the future, not to mention alot of these projects are pointless and do nothing but make the place look fancier for only a short time. She does this because she can't do it herself thanks to arthritis and lyme disease and before she got all of that, she was basically outside all day doing something. The problem is though is that she never, ever thinks about what we think about it. She never considers what other work we have to do and if we try to tell her, she gets super depressed. Also if me and my sister dares show any sign of disagreement and we don't want to do it, she will become furious (hence the bipolar part) at us and will threatens to take our stuff like our computers and stuff like that, which she has done before many times. We also have to be on edge of what we say cause the littlest sign of bad news to mom can get her in a huge depressed mood. Now I sort of understand her pain and why she wants to do all these projects but damn she never thinks of what we might want. I absolutely dread spring and summertime cause that's when she really wants to work on whatever projects she plans though she usually doesn't have projects planned in winter cause its too cold.
As for my dad, he pretty much gave up on reasoning with her at all and he just does whatever she tells him to without question, even if it looks to be a total disaster. My sister and I started doing all this work for her since we was very young kids at about 5 years old (though the work as obviously less at the time cause we were kids but they still was physically demanding for our ages). Our childhoods wasn't like everyone elses and usually revolved around work and trying to enjoy our spare time in what way we could usually playing vidya. She doesn't seem to appreciate our efforts today despite the fact me and my sister are keeping the house going because we have jobs (my dad worked in coal mining for years but he got laid off and he's seeking social security since he got pretty banged up the whole time) and we pay the majority of the bills. Despite this her attitude hasn't changed and she pretty much takes for granted the money we spend for the bills.
Now listen, my sister and I know the absolute importance of work and I'm never afraid to get my hands dirty as long as the work im doing has a purpose and benefits the state of something. Despite my childhood being basically a slave, I do appreciate the hard work I done as it taught me values of hard work and determination. Everyone else my age near me absolutely despises the idea of working a job but to me, I feel its child's play compared to what I had to do. In fact, I enjoy the fact I work a job as it helps me escape the house. I honest to God love my mother and I understand her pain and why she wants to be happy but she never thinks of anyone but herself really. She tries to please everyone around her and gets depressed when she can't. Also the reason the household is so poor is because she got a hold of credit cards and went on spending sprees to make her happy on material stuff and we are still paying off those debts to this day. I figured my sister and I helping keep the house afloat would help her appreciate our efforts more but nope. I can also tell she does not want us to leave. I am 21 years old and I still don't have a driver's license and I didn't start getting driving experience till last year and its about the same deal as with my sister and where I live, you absolutely MUST know how to drive and have a vehicle if you wanna live. Granted we was poor at the time and couldn't afford to waste gas but still. Also we know nothing about finances since my parents have taught me nothing about essential financial knowledge someone absolutely needs to know in the real world.
To sum it up, I want out. I'm tired of all the projects I get dragged into and I want to do what's best for me. I dream of having my own place, going by my rules, deciding what work needs to be done myself, and having a place where I can finally relax and escape. The problem is however if I leave, I leave my family behind and I think my mom would never forgive me and I am in a severe disadvantage in the real world, not to mention I would feel as if I left my family for dead. However if I stay, I continue being a slave to what my mother wants and can't take it anymore. I feel I can snap at any moment and do something absolutely terrible. Somedays I get huge headaches from stressing out and dreading all the work and I can't do a thing. My mental state has just been a total wreck cause of all of this. My sister and I have plotted on escaping the past 2 years but at the last minute I would always coward out cause I felt I wasn't truly ready for the consequences of what would follow. Thankfully the job I have, though part time, is giving me valuable work experience and money to save up for the day I do finally leave to live for myself.
I don't know what the hell to do. This is a situation where I feel whatever choice I make, I lose either way. There is just way more going on here I failed to mention but because there is so much, I can't think of it all on a single post. And if you actually took the time to read though all of this crap I sincerely thank you. I never bring this up to people due to just how a huge subject it is for me to talk about.
>>116917 I'm not really an expert on this sort of thing, so take my advice with a grain of salt. I've got a friend who is in a similar boat, but it's not nearly to the degree of your situation.
The only advice I can really offer is that you need to leave. Staying isn't healthy, not for you, not for your mother, not for your family. It will be hard, yes, and your mother will resent you for it, but she is literally holding you down in life and clearly has no respect for you or anything you do. The money you make can and should be going towards you starting your own life.
Find someone who can give you financial advice and can teach you about how to manage your finances. Work towards getting a place of your own. And truly confront what such a decision will entail. It'll hurt, it'll be hard, but this is the only way any of you can advance in life, and I'm certain will end up being better than staying and wearing yourself out until you end up becoming your mother.
>>116756 Good on you anon! >>116917 Leave for a bit a good degree of freedom can put working for people you love into a different perspective since working for yourself gets lonesome after a while.
>>111192 Welp lads after reading the Schizotypal wiki I think its possible I may have that as well to some degree. My brother who has a psychology degree already thinks I have borderline personality disorder and autism/bipolar disorder are in my immediate family. I haven't had health insurance in almost 9 years and have a, I think, entirely rational fear of getting it professionally diagnosed as my name would just end up on a list that makes it okay to strip certain rights from you. My entire life makes sense in that context as to why I inevitably ultimately attempt to withdraw from society and relationships and prefer to be alone for hours on end and the constant sea of paranoia, and intense anxiety I feel when around others.
On a lighter note.
From Schizoid personality disorder Wikipedia >Frequently, a schizoid individual's social functioning improves, sometimes dramatically, when the individual knows he or she is an anonymous participant in a real-time conversation or correspondence, e.g. in an online chat-room or message-board.
So the chans are so effective because they harness pure unadulterated schizoid and autistic brain power by rewarding them with the feeling of friendship and human interaction in a way that makes them comfortable.
>>117230 >Schizotypal wiki I think its possible I may have that as well to some degree Anon psychology is a meme. The government uses these shit theories and quacks to lock up people who know too much. t. /x/
>>117234 Correct. Why else would they be trying so hard to label honest things like "Being creative without jew permission" and "Caring about the media you consume" with the same label they apply to developmentally-challenged clowns and retards?
>>116917 Is there any way you could live away from your family and still support them? Like maybe room with someone split the rent. Do you plan on attending some kind of schooling? If you are working enough hours it shouldn't be too hard to pay a rent payment monthly. Your mom has to understand you can't live at home forever. Perhaps if you just get away from home for a year or so your mother will realize she doesn't need you and your sister as much as she thought. Preferably live within driving distance, so anytime your mom genuinely needs your physical help you can come by.
If money makes the condition impossible I would focus on that debt. It is a good idea to try and tighten up spending for a while and start maximizing your payments on debt. The quicker you can pay off stuff like that the less time it has to accumulate interest.
Also, you should really get your drivers license asap. I assume you live in a rural setting if your father was a coal miner. Being able to drive on your own can expand your job options a lot.
Honestly though, it sounds like you might just have to claw your way out by saving money, and paying expenses if you want to get out of the house and not abandon your family. I don't know if this is any help, but keep it up anon. This country runs because of people like you.
>>126142 Yes. Qatar for its size is highly functional and has an HDI comparable to Israel. I'd argue its better. Although the nation is heavily reliant on a single industry (so that can be held against it), but it still fits as a successful country. Others like Turkey and Saudi Arabia are also kind of nice even if they are full of scum. Another is Iran, which is growing as a sphere of influence. I think that Peterson particularly falls under the thought of American exceptionalism. I don't blame him.
I'm addicted to (you)s, I can't stop shitposting, I got permabanned from 4chan and now I'm permabanned from 8chan /k/, and a couple weeks ago I got a week long ban on 8chan /pol/. How do I stop?
>>126365 I never exposed myself too much and nobody remembers my name. I could detach easily from those ideas and redpill in peace. I just cringe when I remember that all was Soros' keikaku, and the leaders of that movement are now preaching open borders.
Well, everyone makes mistakes and these things help us learn the wrong ways of our life.
I have no interest in mlp, let alone watching TV shows or movies for that matter. I just come here for the politics and various assorted fringe topics that aren't necessarily politically incorrect but too uncommon to discuss outside of smaller communities.
>>126494 Its a testament to the degree of (((social engineering))) that plagues society and the increasingly broken or dysfunctional nature of modern families. Statistically speaking, there are as many (if not more) broken, single-parent, dysfuctional, etc. families as there are not. Fags may want to dismiss JP's appeal as "hurr hurr, daddy issues", and if that illustrates the mentality of people from functional households that ALONE is saying something, but the fact remains that (((they))) have been meticulously undermining stable homes and families for an innumerable amount of time. JP (not exclusively) has the experience and authority to address these issues and is actively doing so. Tl;dr JP is the man, detractors are like crabs in a crab-pot
>>126575 It really does. People from "Stable homes" these days are faggots with inferiority complexes, they feel like they're less tough for "Playing life on easy mode" so they need to tell themselves everyone around them can't bear the weights they carry as well as themselves.
>>114284 I hate scat too, I can't enjoy piss clop if there's shit in it.
I'm not really a fan of human piss, even though I'd love to watch a human woman piss in the shower for me. Something about the naughtiness and how intimate and private a subject piss is usually supposed to be, plus how cute women look when they're holding onto their overfull bladders trying desperately not to let go.
But mare piss is something even better, it's this beautiful torrent of warm wet nectar, and they'll piss wherever you want and whenever you want if you've trained them and they trust you enough.
I sometimes wish i was dead so that no one ever finds just how much degenerate crap i'm hiding whitin like 10 layers of pretending. Plus i'm scared that one day i for some reason lose my sanity and end up doing some stuff i would really regret.
Outside of that i'm pretty happy with my nice life for now.
>>127273 How can I tell when all the mods posting Pinkie pictures could be Moddy Pie? Did that one mod adopt the name Moddy Pie, or is it an umbrella name donned by many? I really don't know.
>>114587 Well, I'll tell you one thing. I'm 100% convinced almost all homosexuals were molested as kids. I also believe 100% homosexuality and Judaism are the two main causes of child sexual abuse. I hope to pay my repentance in the blood of kikes and sodomites so nobody else has to deal with this shit.
I'm not really too bothered about what happened to me, I can't say I have negative feelings about it because I wasn't technically "raped" like i said i thought it was just a game boys were supposed to play together and older boys were supposed to teach the younger boys, but some form of vengeance has to be merited out, even if it is a bullet to the back of my head
Most fucked up part is 3 of the kids I hurt are still friends of mine today one of which is like an adopted brother. I'm not sure if they don't remember or if they just don't want to talk about it.
I have never listened to a word Richard Spencer has said aside from that clip of him sieg heiling that the media showed us, because I'm afraid that if I do I'll go full neo-nazi 148h8.
>>130292 I have never listened to a word Richard Spencer has said because I consider him controlled opposition and more of a hack than any serious activist, campaigner or philosopher. I also secretly hold disgust toward those who adore him as some sort of visionary because I consider them sheep; if I expose them to this, they generally call me a cuck, a shill, or a divider.
>>131410 >>131341 >>131335 Why do you want to kill yourselves tho, there are a lot of better ways to die, like hunting bears with a knife or something.
I bought seasons of Mlp from 1 to 5 dvd's for 90$. I looked everywhere but that was the cheapest offer I could find however the dvd's work fine. I bought them cause my abysmal internet goes out often and its so horribly slow pirating is out of the question since it would take days in order to download them all, let alone find where to pirate them. I'm not sure if I made a good investment or not.
>>131792 Don't open them and sell it to some sad neckbeard and you can make a good amount if its mint shit. Probs in 4-8 years you can rip someone off for at least 1.5 the amount.
I don't even really like the show that much. Like, I've watched about three full episodes and it's wholesome and all but not really something I'd watch recreationally. I'm only along for the ride because of the fanfiction and fan projects and shit.
>>131816 >Like, I've watched about three full episodes Here is your problem. I disliked the first 2 and the third episode was meh in my mind. If you really want to give it a shot binge the first season and if you still don't care for it then that's fine.
>>110942 I'm extremely confused about this. You (I'm assuming you are a dude) were starting to become sexually mature and then acted out of instinct. If she was uncomfortable and you kept going, that would be a problem. But you didn't even wait for that and went home. Maybe you are fibbing and she told you to stop. You did. There is nothing wrong with that. So long as you ultimately had control, acting like a horny 12 year old when you were twelve is no big deal.
>>110814 I have gay thoughts, and I know it's because I suffered from abuse when I was little, yet, I cannot stop it. This causes me a lot of distress, I don't want to be gay, I fucking hate feeling the urge to be dominated, its the complete opposite of what I think is right and it destroys my dignity as a man. I fucking swear I will put a bullet in my head before giving myself to these thoughts, but how can I ever become a good father if I have this kind of problem?
I'm scared I might lose control, and there is no way of treating this, society encourages homosexuality. I hate this.
What do I do mlpol, I don't want to an hero, I'm scared
>>133129 >>133125 I Know how you feel, I was in the same situation, but what I’m currently doing to prevent me from becoming a delusional degenerate is by cutting porn off completely and start no fap and cut off anything that supports these degenerate acts like in tv, video games, or sites the but if you do this the urges are going to be really hard to handle and really unbearable, but you got to stick your neck out trust me after a few months you will start feeling better and the thoughts become nonexistent and don’t listen or be around those people who support those thoughts who want you to fall into degeneracy
>>133129 >vore Same here, except I started at age 12. It doesn’t help that I stuck to vore because “it doesn’t show any nudity, so it doesn’t count” (which led me into the more fucked up sub-categories of vore like unbirthing and cock vore, which led to typical - albeit not real - explicit content) and furry porn because “it’s not humans, so it doesn’t count” (that is NOT how it works, and it made me open to more faggoty porn). As life went on and I became sadder at my lack of companionship, this sort of thing became less of a hobby and more of a physical “need”. I didn’t realize the extent of autism and degeneracy I was getting myself into until it was too late.
The best I’ve been able to do in years is that I went about a month without porn back in December (during Winter break, when I didn’t have to stress about anything else). But I’d say it generally varies around 3-6 times/week.
>>133175 If you can’t quit something that’s not a necessity like tv, video games or fapping for at least 90 days you probably have addiction to it also who Knows if you continue your life of degeneracy you might end up like the guy from /r9k/
>>133125 >>133129 >>133131 >>133175 I don't think the problem is masturbation. Its normal for males to masturbate and not ever masturbating can increase your chance of prostate cancer.
The problem is fucked up fetish porn. Like whenever people masturbate to something they are training themselves to be aroused by it. All it takes is a few inclinations during puberty and its easy to become addicted to a fetish. That is the curse of the internet. All it takes is a few clicks to spiral into a world of fucked up fetish porn.
I'd like to confess and share my experiences here as well. My parents never told me about sex until like 7th grade and they basically told me nothing aside from that you put your penis into a girl to have sex. God, I don't know why I did, but I remember reading old Greek mythology where people would get turned into animals, and I would get an erection. At the time I had no idea what was happening. I would just sit on my bed and think about it while having an erection sometimes. In 7th grade I kept getting urges to sleep naked and I didn't know why. I thought I was losing my mind. I couldn't explain to myself why I felt that way. Eventually I did sleep naked and started masturbating by humping my bed(BTW if you are a prone masturbator, don't do this; I later found out prone masturbation can lead to erectile dysfunction later in life). During the aforementioned masturbation, I had no idea what was happening. I was extremely disgusted and ashamed of myself for masturbating. I was also extremely guilty feeling that I was attracted to women, because I felt that it was wrong to covet women sexually. Thanks to the internet I eventually began masturbating to transformation porn and gender change porn. People turning into animals and men turning into women or both, was the ultimate form of disgust, horror, and seemingly irresistible surrender to lust that I had experienced masturbating. Sometimes I can't even masturbate to a picture of a sexy woman without thinking, "I wish I looked like that" and it disgusts me so much. I don't want to keep getting off to this shit and I worry if it will affect my future sex life with a woman.
Sorry if that is a bit long, but I think fetishes are trained. From my experience, if it wasn't for the internet providing such a wealth of fetish porn, and if parents encouraged their kids to masturbate normally without needing tons of fetish material to feel aroused, things would be better. I have a responsibility for my actions, but I wish I had known what I know now when I was younger.
It's good to let things like this out, not op, but >>133129 here. Shitty phoneposting. Beginning no fap this weekend, going innawoods for the first 20. Taking some time off to work on hobby projects. I understand that maturation is natural, but I am fapping to unnatural things.
>>133286 The concept of substance addiction is taught at an early age, but they don’t teach you the exact science behind addiction (dopamine, etc) or that it can apply to anything.
>>133286 This, masturbation is completely normal, even the bible of all things has nothing to say about it.
I have a confession too. Since 2010 and growing up with /co/ and /mlp/, ponies have turned into a fetish that's badly effecting me. >inb4 wow what a faggot, it's just horse pussy One thing leads to another, and now I can't even wank to women. I can barely get off to a woman if I imagine she has a tail, wings and other pony features. Even then it's difficult, hell she might as well BE a pony. But If I go to derpi and filter by explicit ponies? Then it's boner city. Things quickly became worse as I was exposed to other fetishes featuring in clop. Such as; malesub, cum inflation, tentacles, futa, and hoof holding. I even came close to buying one of those Bad Dragon things, which are obviously supposed to represent mlp, despite the huge costs involved with duty fees etc. Or one of those body pillow dakimaki things. I never thought about what I was doing, never thought it was wrong, and what effect it would have on me in the future.
A few years later in 2014 I became redpilled on the JQ, and in particular pornography. I feel disgusted with my past self. I now know it's degenerate, and I feel bad for doing it, but I can't stop. I used to wank to clop 3 times a day at least, since then I've been trying to cut down, but the horse pussy keeps pulling me back. Now I only clop twice, sometimes once a day. I've tried quitting cold turkey aka nofap multiple times, but it's impossible because I turn into a feverish horny mess, that can't focus on anything without thinking of horse pussy. Which, coupled with stress due to work, turns me into an evil bastard. So it's ended up becoming a necessity. The one thing. The one line I swore I would never cross, and still haven't to this day, is foalcon.
This place doesn't really help to be honest. But as a bong, and as 4/pol/ and 8/pol/ are shit, /mlpol/ is basically the last shill free bastion of true freedom of speech. It's the only avenue I have to vent and express my political views, without fear of getting arrested, because of the socialist and politically correct regime I live under. I honestly don't know where to go from here, if we managed to turn society around, I don't know how I'll handle a real woman. Sorry for the long post too.
>>133322 Honestly, I agree with you. I was disgusted with myself before, but after my redpill I hated myself for it. I still do, but I have more of a drive to revolt against it.
Motivation is not enough, Devotion is manhood.
Find your cause, reject degeneracy, better yourself. Admit your faults, and then fix them.
>>133286 You're right about fetishes being trained. I've gotten off to furry porn and mlpussy for so long, it feels like a rare treat, some kind of strange new lewd fetish, when I fap to a human woman.
>>131234 Me too. >>130292 Too late, we're nazis now. It's nazi to want your country to be successful and safe and beautiful, it's nazi to want the globalists to stop getting in the way of that, and it's nazi to want a better future for mankind, rather than "Peoplekind". It isn't going to consume your life, but accepting what the jews did to you will help you come to terms with it. And once you do that, you can start fighting back and redpilling normies while stocking up for the day of the rope. Or your own personal one that comes when the globalist army comes for you and "Arrests" you at gunpoint.
>>133356 >Find your cause, reject degeneracy, better yourself. Admit your faults, and then fix them. I've been doing this to a certain extent, what with the UK in a pre-civil-war state. So now that I'm trying to cut down more, I put my pent up energy into something useful, like lifting for example. Or at night, instead of clopping I read a book, right now I'm reading about guerrilla warfare tactics. I find that doing these things helps the urges go away, keep my mind preoccupied with something I'm interested in, like surviving a damn war.
>>133322 >>133286 You guys are making accuse for your addiction and you’re both unhappy with the current state of living, but you keep doing it because your brain is in a routine and you must stop it >I've tried quitting cold turkey aka nofap multiple times, but it's impossible because I turn into a feverish horny mess, that can't focus on anything without thinking of horse pussy
These telltale signs of withdrawal, stop you both damaging yourselves and stopping yourselves from your true potential
Elevated dopamine and changes in sexual preference Here's more evidence that sexual tastes can be profoundly re-conditioned: A male rat can be conditioned to prefer a same-sex partner by jacking up his dopamine. And it doesn't take very long. Researchers injected a male rat with a dopamine agonist (a drug that mimics dopamine), and then placed him in a cage with another male. The two rats just hung out together for a day. (The dopamine agonist is out of the system in about one day.) Researchers repeated this 2 more times, 4 days apart. A few days later, the reconditioned male was put to the test. With no dopamine agonist in his system, he was placed into a cage with his male buddy and sexually receptive female (remember the dopamine was out of his system). Guess which rat turned him on the most? He showed much more response to the male: more erections, more genital investigation, and even female-like solicitations —as opposed to normal male mounting behavior. Lesson? High levels of dopamine can powerfully rewire the brain and alter sexual tastes. The researchers emphasized that the male rat wasn't gay, as he didn't try to mount the other rat. Yet he had definitely changed. Similarly, continued porn use cannnot change your sexual orientation, but it can change what type of porn excites you.
>>133395 >>133393 >>133392 Sorry for namefagging, but I don't see any ID's, not sure if that's on my end or what. Anyway, thanks anon, a lot. I've never delved into the psychology of it or the chemical effects on the brain, but what you wrote and the info-graphs you give make a lot of sense, especially the study on the rat I can relate to. I had a quick look and it's the same chemical, dopamine, that's released when you're aroused. I don't think I'll be able to quit cold turkey yet, but I'll try harder to do it less, slowly if I have to. Just cut down until the point where I don't even miss it anymore, then I'll stop completely. Instead focusing more on the kinds of things I mentioned in >>133391.
>>133406 I have no idea why ID aren’t here it’s rather annoying, anyway it’s good that you acknowledge your addiction and your going to fight it, Good luck and remember it’s an addiction so it’s going to be a difficult thing to kick but you must persist and in the end you will be a better man for it
>>133422 Ah, so it isn't just me with no ID's then, good. >Good luck Thanks man, I'm going to need it. Nice to know I'm not the only one here with this struggle either. >you must persist and in the end you'll be a better man for it Will do.
>>133422 >I have no idea why ID aren’t here it’s rather annoying OP here, its so if anons wanted to get stuff off their chest they wouldn't have to been seen as the same person with the same problems over and over again. That way say someone had a LOT of problems it'd seem like we just had a lot of anons with a lot of problems. >>133451 Please turn them off.
>>133476 not OP here, I think he wants IDs off so it can be sort of like a private confession so people don't feel bad for others knowing how many problems they have, regardless of if their identity is known or not.
>>133476 I think what >>133474 is trying to say is, it's to give a further sense of anonymity. Meaning that if they had more problems than the first reply, they could make another one without seeming like they're in too deep, so to speak. Which makes sense, and probably gives anons further incentive to come clean and get advice.
Sometimes, I look at the major ideological differences between the people who go on this site, and it makes me think that the only reason we haven't torn ourselves apart yet like /leftypol/ is because, unlike them, we all agree on a common enemy. It makes me afraid for "what comes next", after we've vanquished our foes.
No matter how hard I try I can't feel love or hate for ppl. I'm worried a family member will die and others will realize this at a funeral because I don't even know how to fake being sad when it comes to friends and family dying. A definite blessing and curse.
>I can't feel love or hate for ppl Your family & friends will think you grieve in your own way or your tough and take it in strife But Better than my situation all I feel is hate and I know one day that hate is going to be the death of me or others (most likely me) and I worry how my family will react to my decision I have chosen and how it would affect them
>>133535 >>133536 As far as degeneracy goes I feel like it's a pretty harmless one. Jacking off to a cartoon or forming a romantic emotional bond with a fictional character is probably degenerate, but in the grand scheme of things I think it's less degenerate as well as less destructive than going out and having random hookup sex with total strangers.
>>133535 >>133550 Honestly the porn on this site is the only thing that really bothers me, I simply dislike mlp porn in general but at least it's not as bad as all the gross and weird fetish threads that take up half of /mlp/ at any given time.
>>133651 https://youtu.be/y11wbUkaaDE But seriously? I don't have a problem with gays. It's their fucking culture of it being fine to sleep around with 50 men in a single week, never be loyal to your spouse and literally spread aids/hiv on purpose.
>>133651 No it’s not ok, it’s a Jewish scheme that disgusting degenerate fall for as pointed out here >>133395 The Frankfurt School Multiculturalism Quotes What is meant is, these reptilians prefer assuming the roles of gays and lesbians in the public. This serves several purposes. They are the masters of manipulation and gay men and women are the easiest of the genders to manipulate and control, due to cross-wiring of ovaries and other glands behind the ears. It also serves to destabilize the social fabric and causes cleaves in the aura, which they then exploit through possession of the sacral and solar plexus...Ojai was just filled with predators yesterday. In the park, on the streets, being about. Six years ago, the gay community set their sites on Pasadena - specifically, Old Town. Then took it over. It now sports 22 gay bars and various associated things. 14 sex shops, when there was only one in town, before. Things like that. Ojai has now the same problem. The same money is now sending flocks of openly gay men, in groups of four, six, and eight, cruising the little streets and boulevards. This is a tiny town of 8000 people, hidden away. Now, it looks like the West Side, on a Sunday afternoon. And that's how they do it. Burrow from underneath, move in satanic money, and then fill the locale scene with sex parties, hard drugs, and eager gay mkids willing to take the curious locals on a walk down the wild side. And it was very obvious yesterday, that this has is now happening to Ojai. Thanks, Rae http://www.whale.to/b/dor80.htm "Dr. Paul R. McHugh, the Distinguished Service Professor of Psychiatry at Johns Hopkins University and former psychiatrist–in-chief for Johns Hopkins Hospital, who has studied sexuality for 40 years, said it is a scientific fact that “there is no gay gene.” “Environment,” however, “is very important,” said Dr. McHugh, author of The Mind Has Mountains: Reflections on Society and Psychiatry. He also explained that the permissive sexual culture in the United States today has confused “desire” with “love,” and that homosexuality is a false or “erroneous desire.” Also this is a Great article on degeneracy and study on mental illness which is homosexuality
>>133657 If you hate those things, you hate gay people. That's what they are, and that's what they become as soon as they no longer feel they have to keep "Convincing you" to be okay with the degeneracy they want to revel in and encourage.
>>133550 I think having a good and moral "Waifoo" (favourite cartoon character) can only be a good thing. It encourages your mind to seek out these traits in a potential partner.
>>133651 I don't care what others think, being a faggot means losing all self control, dignity and values; I could never dream of being good man, let alone a good father if I gave up my heterosexuality.
>>133691 >>133728 That's the balance I think. There's nothing wrong with having a fantasy that represents an ideal, but you have to maintain at least some connection to reality. Some people I think just get pulled too far into it, which is something you have to be careful of.
>>133729 I've fapped to futa and pregnant fetish porn is just your natural desire to impregnate a woman manifesting, but can you explain the appeal of "Vore"?
>>133612 Well, it's not porn, I mean, porn is not porn. I mean, we look at porn the wrong way, it is not supposed to exite us, it's just the act of coitus dramatized for erotic purposes. Looking at horsepussy and ponies mating should be as exciting as watching animal planet.
>>133690 I meant I don't have a problem with gay sexual acts. If they'd just change their culture. Just like I don't have a problem with people being black, but nigger culture is cancer.
>>110847 I know it can be hard, but keep your head up anon. Try to find a therapist, talking always helps. You'll eventually overcome these traumas and live life to the fullest, best of luck anon.
>>110814 I have a tendency to be insincere about my name when alone in social situations aka at a club without any family memebers or people who know my real name. Conversely, I fear posting on anonymous websites and I don't know why.
>>133945 Sub-80 IQs and a race that lost Darwin's race for evolution created nigger culture. 5% of the brownish people with 85-90 IQ might be able to move on from nigger culture but only once the low-IQ genes have been selectively bred out of them.
>Wean I was in boy scouts I would go camping with my scout troop in the mountains. (in this case, Colorado with other troops form all around the U.S.of A ,)
> I use to still the underwear that was just siting out side of the showers and throw them into the woods with a shit eating grin on my face.