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/ub/ - Überhengst

Becoming better
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File: 1575097443913.png (167.61 KB, 800x805, sad_filly_derpy___vector_b….png)

305d1 No.1958

Hello, I don't know how to start this but here goes.
I think I need to change my life.
Dealing with people is exhausting on its own. But dealing with childish faggy egomaniacs who want to "win" internet arguments and get that precious fucking social credit clout and a sense of pride and accomplishment is even more exhausting.
And it seems the latter is the only kind of person I meet online any more. They're so angry, all the time. So poisonous and spiteful, constantly trying to piss you off. It's not…
This might sound weird.
It's not tiresome or annoying any more.
I don't like how routine this has become.
Endure the pseudointellectualism of this faggot and let him pretend he's clever, say no u when the other one calls you a faggot, imagine yourself rolling your eyes when this different faggot wastes hours of his own life trying to bully you on a website you don't care about and then pretends he's got a deep moral lesson to teach you and it's your fault his gay uncle gave him AIDS.
They're so desperate to feel like they can win something. Even if it's faggy internet "drama" Boomer office-politics retardity.
I'm sick of mudbrained niggers raging at me for not liking their new Star Wars movies or new Hasbro(tm) brand shit or new SwSh incomplete games. I'm sick of trying to justify myself to consumernigger podfaggot pigpeople who will never admit humans have a right to have tastes and standards.
This place is pretty good, but just this place. Everywhere else is full of niggers.
Politics is exhausting. Boomers and their parents deserve a new holocaust for what they allowed the Jews to do to us. Liberals aren't human and I'm sick of pretending I'm shocked when they shit debates up. It's a black and white issue, no pun intended, how the fuck do so many people find this so hard to understand? Politics feels like a lost cause. No one person every week I redpill can make up for the legions bluepilled by Jew schools. Conformity to faggotry is the faggot's religion.
I have hatred for the Jews. It's an insult that fanfags think I hate their subpar product as much as I hate Jews, and it's depressing that they hate me even more than I hate Jews. Hate for me consumes their every waking thought, I only think of Jews during politics time and whenever I see evidence of their fuckery.
I've got other hobbies, I exercise and diet now, and everything besides dealing with pony and politics is rewarding and fun. I've lost so much weight my stomach is almost flat. I've never been this light in my life.
I should be happy. And I am. I'm legitimately proud of my body now.
I'm proud of who I am. 90% of who I am, anyway.
I'm usually happy, which makes the contrast more noticeable when I put myself through this faggy online bullshit.
And I don't know why I do that.
I try to do what's right.
I try to have good optics and win debates and help people see the light.
Is there a non-pozzed Christian forum out there where I'm allowed to say Feminism is cancer and fuck Jews?
Is Christianity as a whole a lost cause? Was I an idiot for going back to it?
I miss when I could say "I like MLP" just like I miss when I could say "I like Star Wars". Modernity is depressing and I feel like a faggot who wants to wallow in muh childish nostalgia forever instead of getting on with his own life and making something worth a damn.
I want to fully become someone I can be proud of, and I don't see any reason to see "dedication" to hasjew products as something to admire.
Sometimes being in this fandom is suffering. All the sites are full of fanfags. And I don't know why I put myself through it. Habit? Tradition?
I don't know what I expect to gain out of posting this.
But here it is.
I think I need to spend less time on pony and politics, or find a way to make time spent on these things better for the soul.

320a6 No.1959

… processing…

4023a No.1960

File: 1575099024684.png (55.08 KB, 396x474, AFQT.png)

You're not alone anon. Sit tight

a7532 No.1961

File: 1575100949909.jpg (103.39 KB, 1024x832, 1538555682423.jpg)

>find a way to make time spent on these things better for the soul.
You might need a vacation…
Cutting off the faggots, and kikes. Just some time for you.
I… I don't know how I can help here, but I'm here to listen,
and these
Anons care too.

c9eca No.1962

Take a break, anon.
Watch some wholesome stuff like mlp and stop using the internet for social interaction for a while, get the poison and faggots out of your system.
Now remember it is people that generate this kind of situation, you can always just cut a conversation and walk away if you're not feeling like it, arguing with retards has no point.

Also you dont have to stand pseudointelectual faggots, calling them on their bullshit is both fun for you and good for them in the long run.
Dont take retards at heart, it can only hurt you.

320a6 No.1963

File: 1575104633952.jpg (179.22 KB, 1080x1007, dhdtjdzhzd.jpg)

>arguing with retards has no point

320a6 No.1964

File: 1575108144344.png (542.36 KB, 1000x1255, jack daniels_mare_solo_to.png)

>Politics feels like a lost cause. No one person every week I redpill can make up for the legions bluepilled by Jew schools.
It depends from where are you observing. Politics as well "democracy" is a rigged jewish game, but to cause mayhem among the kikes and their golems is most of the time rewarding. In regard to the redpilling, be assured this is the most successful grassroot propaganda operation in history, thanks to the internet the people's voice can be heard and no wonder the kikes and the (((UN))) want to regulate it and if needed shut down. Look around, the politicians and tech monopolies are taking at heart the Jewish mandate to silence the people's counter narrative.
So, don't be surprised that after the 2020 reelection a crackdown against wrong thinking will come. Just step aside a look at how the normals react, it will be very entertaining.

>Conformity to faggotry is the faggot's religion.

I love this phrase, it deserves to be memed.

>I try to have good optics and win debates and help people see the light

>help people
I think this is the wrong approach because you will end up burnt.
Remember, lemmings will not move their comfy asses and therefore deserve nothing, however, they are material to agitate and propel against the kikes and specially the infrastructure keeping them in power: The System.

>I don't know what I expect to gain out of posting this.

I believe a little push to take distance and regain clarity.
Poner, you are dismissed for the time being. Go and take care of yourself, the world will keep spinning anyway.

ddcf7 No.1965

>help people
A wise anon once told me "dont teach people, guide them to the lake"
As in do not try to change someone but push them into the right direction so the current does the job for you.

305d1 No.1970

Thank you. I'm going to take a short vacation from politics and rewatch the old FIM while also watching old shows.

320a6 No.1974

File: 1575198600266.png (174.81 KB, 735x781, my-little-pony-Fluttershy-….png)

305d1 No.1975

Day 1 of my vacation has passed. So far it's very relaxing but what do I do about the "I am wasting my time and I should be doing x right now" sensation?

7dd48 No.1976

You quite simply need to learn to ignore shit and step away from arguments. The internet is dominated by retards and faggots; it always has been and always will be. It's okay to let them think they're right, because it doesn't affect you.
Arguing with faggots online is a lost cause. Save your energy and look away for people who are worth your time to chat with.

And if you're the kind of person who has to win internet arguments to feel a fleeting sense of gratification, you might be slowly turning into a pseudo-intellectual internet faggot yourself.

tl;dr just chill, m8.

305d1 No.1979

Day 2. I went for a calming walk in a forest somewhere and watched some cartoons from my childhood when I got home.

This is nice.

76564 No.1980

Good luck OP, I'll be following in your footsteps. When I'm out of state, I'll be watching the show, doing some self help work of my own, reading through my book collection, helping grandpa maintain his ranch and such. Hoping that things work out well for me, but no guarantees yet.

8278d No.1981

>reading through my book collection
This helps a lot.

305d1 No.1984

Day 3 of my vacation.
It dawned upon me that barely anything changed compared to what little I accomplished before and after my vacation started. My motivation and dedication had been missing for a while now.
Only difference is, I'm politics and pony-free for a while.
But today, things changed a little. I got motivation to try and work on something I'd given up hope on. I made a tiny amount of progress, then got tempted into switching to working on something easier. Work is still work, right?
In other news I've been keeping up my daily exercises even though I'm on vacation. I think I'll go to the forest again today, it's real empty during the winter months.
I also saw this BlackPilled video about some hoarder faggot.
I'm afraid I might be becoming a hoarder.
I feel the urge to hold onto all my possessions just in case I might need them, and when I do get money I feel the urge to spend it on shit that seems useful and could be sold for value in an emergency.
I don't know how to deal with that, but at least I don't hoard my trash or put myself into debt or buy pointless toys. I have no Funko Pops or anime figurines or Amiibos or Skylanders or Disney Infinity toys or any shit like that, and I'm proud of that.
I clean my room regularly, too.
Right now my temptations to buy X are saying "Buy consoles homebrewed to run all their games using hard drives!" because one of my friends has a Wii homebrewed like that and it's pretty cool.
Should I indulge in that urge? I don't want to be a videogame addict, but making video games is my lifelong dream and I've got great ideas for video games I can refine by playing other games in their genres. And one amazing idea I'm putting in my current project was inspired by a shit game I played a few months ago.
I kept thinking "Why didn't the devs just code it like this?" and then I thought I should code it like that. So I will when I get around to it.
Fanfics for pony, abandoned fanfics for nonpony stuff like Pokemon, art, animation, my tulpa's original story, indie game projects… I should make some tough choices about which of these things I should cut out of my life so I can focus on what'll make me happy and successful. I know those two things aren't connected but my dream is to make video games, writing and drawing were hobbies I picked up along the way. And writing doesn't feel much like a hobby any more, it feels like a chore.
Good idea. I wish I had cool family members with cool stuff like farms. I've got a downloaded book collection (which is tooootally legal if you catch what i'm saying) and a collection of books from a local charity store, and I should start actually reading these things regularly instead of just hoarding them.

a7532 No.1985

>I feel the urge to hold onto all my possessions just in case I might need them, and when I do get money I feel the urge to spend it on shit that seems useful and could be sold for value in an emergency.
>Right now my temptations to buy X

Well I'd sort whatever positive cash flow into three or four piles.
First short term expenses that MUST be paid.
Second emergency expenses when life will take a shit.
Third long term expenses so that being able to live that long it won't suck.
Fourth is whatever you want to use it for.

For short term the exact amount or higher. All expenses taxes, water, food, electricity, ect.
Then split the remaining money roughly 80% for emergency/long term and 20% for long term/expendable.

This is just a really rough guide line.

305d1 No.1986

Thank you, that's good advice.
If you could choose one console to get, homebrew-hack, and then get all the games for it ever on a hard drive connected to it, what would you choose?
Personally I'm eyeing the PS3 since I never had one of those and I hear barely any of its games have been ported to the PS4. Which I already have, but it isn't homebrewed because it was too new for the known homebrew tricks last time I checked. I only have a handful of bargain-bin preowned PS4 games, but they're good ones.
Day 4 of my vacation.
Had a dream where I discovered the ability to float like Peach from Smash Bros only everyone suddenly also had it and thought it was normal, and they also thought I was crazy for thinking it's something new I "discovered". I shrugged and said "Just kidding lol" and floated to the grocery store to buy milk. Had a very normal day aside from the floating, which felt great.
Then I woke up, and laughed over what a weird dream that was.
The sound of my own genuine laughter feels really nice without its usual forced or stressed undertone.
I'm not sure how long this should last but between exercising right, sleeping right and doing what I enjoy instead of raging over politics, I feel happy and healthy.
Went to the forest for real this time, sniffed like a hamon user, jogged some laps around its twisting paths.
Then went to a nearby friend's house and played some vidya. Got him to cancel all £90 worth of his subscriptions by showing him how to REALLY use his amazon fire stick. Why is it called a stick when it's more of a box hanging out of the TV's side awkwardly?
Watched a ton of One Piece anime together. Was then introduced to Meta Runner. God I wish that were me.
Went home and finished marathonning My Life as a Teenage Robot. As a kid, I had a fucking massive crush on her. I feel a bit silly about that, but not as silly as I feel about the even bigger crush I had on Twilight Sparkle as a teenager and young adult.

1a6bb No.1987

I believe in you.

305d1 No.1988

Thank you.
Another day of vacation. Sometimes I catch myself thinking to myself how fucking evil the Jews are. I remind myself to stop because I already know this. It's not like repeating this to myself in different ways gives me ideas for political memes.
Finished watching Danny Phantom, S3 felt very cartoonish compared to the previous two seasons. And Vlad lost all his ominous cred with this "annoying next door Squidward who's also the mayor" bullshit. The morals also feel very forced, with characters narrating lessons right to the audience's faces way too often. Why does S3e1 feature Danny talking to a character he doesn't meet until the next episode? E1 is written as if he already met this guy but E2 shows him meeting the guy and gaining the Infinimap, which is somewhat important to the rest of the story arc. That's a cool under utilized concept. Half the Tardis in a scroll, a map that takes you and shows you anywhere. Neat.
Designed another character for my indie game. This one is also a hot babe.
You know how some people bitch about how many fantasy races have sexy women and monsterous males?
Sometimes I consider a mix of both approaches for my work. Some races have hot men and ugly women, some have ugly men and hot women. Some have ugly both and some have hot both.
Then again, my game's main character is a hot babe with huge tits. So anyone I would impress with that design choice would be too titty triggered to appreciate this.
I know I shouldn't think on politics during my break but if you got PETA pissed off about Halal islamic animal cruelty meat that would kick up a ruckus and redpill some about halal meat. They're currently mad over some twitch thot fucking her dog and throwing her cat, or something. The degenerate.
It's funny. The stereotype says crazy cat ladies are bad… but crazy dog ladies train their dogs to lick them out. That's bad too.
Jesus fucking christ, this world is so disgusting sometimes.
sometimes i feel like a kid with outdated oversensitive morals
and sometimes i feel like the last adult alive on a planet of shit eaters.
I know you guys don't eat shit, you aren't gay. My head knows I'm not alone but my heart wishes I had more friends.
Everyone I know is fucking weird. Everyone, except for two new friends I don't know all that well yet. I don't resent them for being weird and I should probably be flattered that people let down all their masks around my honest simple ass but sometimes it just stuns you. It catches you off guard, you know? You go from barely knowing someone to knowing he pisses out of his window before bed every night. Why do you know this? Because he casually told you during a smash melee netplay session.
I just…
I sometimes feel like I'm the only sane one I know, even though I know that's stupid and I have at least 4 sane friends.
Also I took a Monster Energy Drink for the first time yesterday. Downed it in under a minute, it felt cold and rotten in my stomach for hours. Only now, a few hours after downing it, is any sort of twitchiness kicking in. I'm no cartoon character but this feels kind of nice. Feelings rushing through my body. Energy. I don't want to get addicted to these, but these things feel strong and taste like ass. Call me a purefag and poorfag but I normally drink water purified at home. Was curious how this one tasted. Like cheap 30p by the litre cola is the answer. Who the hell can drink this drug daily?
Holy fucking shit how much did I write?
I guess I'm fucking a cartoon character after all.
typo but I still want to fuck Twilight Sparkle.
Sometimes I get the urge to commission porn of my OC with her but I don't do it. I've got real shit I need to spend money on. I've never done that before anyway. Wouldn't know where to begin or who to hire. Whoever draws those Lyra with the floaty glowy gold magic hands fucking two ponies, I saw porn of that once, that guy's pretty good. Still on a no nut streak. I don't want to break it. And I'd probably never live down the enbarassment of doing something so degenerate. What would my imaginary future children and grandchildren think?
Fuck I'll probably never have those, I'm 23 going on 24 and still a jobless virgin. I've got neet roommates who thankfully stay in their own hentaifag rooms but I could never bring a woman in here.
Fuck me I'm still going. Still writing.
I'm not a fucking cartoon character, I need to stop.

305d1 No.1989

Oh also this one friend of mine showed me this Family Guy Speedrun video, a parody of real speedrun videos and explanations. The bullshit about "the end flag being loaded second" was funny, but he said all speedrunning videos make no sense to him.
Fucking normie, how can he not understand the subtle genius of parallel universes and QPUs in Mario?
It's explained so simply even someone like me who doesn't own the game can understand it.
also I wish I had the power to save the world.
I wish I could motivate people back into caring and trying to make this world a better place.
I try to play therapist for my friends, but I don't know why I can't do this for myself.
Why can't I solve my own problems? Why can't I stop being a lazy faggot, asked the guy who quit his lifelong masturbation and sweets addiction and lost fucktons of weight but didn't write as many pointless trashy pony fanfic words as he wanted to?
What the fuck is my life.
Maybe this vacation is so I can take a step back and re examine everything.

320a6 No.1990

File: 1575535108487.png (299.47 KB, 900x379, img-1406587-2-pony_money_b….png)

>Hitler dubs
>sometimes i feel like a kid with outdated oversensitive morals
Naturally, everybody around have been corrupted by the kike poison.
The redpilling is what make you see the real world, it isn't pretty but discouraging, but it is what it is.
>Everyone, except for two new friends I don't know all that well yet
Allow me to give you my expertise, don't put your chips on friends, but only yourself.
>I'm 23 going on 24 and still a jobless virgin.
Again my expertise, or better my experience.
1- Age: You have the right age to begin to do your thing; meaning to be independent and don't take any drag along with you, literally.
2- Jobless: A job usually means to enslave yourself to another man for some coins for a sandwich. I believe you must become the jew and begin to barter stuff, or if that is not profitable or possible, LEARN A TRADE.
Befriend a latino and find out how to get a sweaty job, in the worst case scenario you will descend into the brute universe but with at least 100 bucks a day. The point is to make some capital.
3- Virgin: Who cares. I know you won't believe me, buuuuuuut trust me, all pussies are the same, just a wet hole with potential diseases, and the woman carrying that hole is hardwired by the Creator to be a parasite and a pain in your ass. Stay away for the time being.

Poner, your future as a human being is not marked for your success with whores, but, your will and determination to become financially solvent.

320a6 No.1991

File: 1575536432890.jpg (110.46 KB, 600x600, pony math.jpg)

And because I don't want you to go in circles thinking about friends, women, and the contemplation of your life, let me go straight to the cheese to turn around your life:
>Might Is Right - Or the Survival of the Fittest - by Ragnar Redbeard - (1896)

In case you have not desire or time to read, an audiobook is available:
>Might is Right - Ragnar Redbeard - AUDIOBOOK - Part 1 of 3
>Might is Right - Ragnar Redbeard - AUDIOBOOK - Part 2 of 3
>Might is Right - Ragnar Redbeard - AUDIOBOOK - Part 3 of 3

85d09 No.1992

>Befriend a latino and find out how to get a sweaty job
This option is good if OP is broke, for sure he will learn construction and who knows, if he is smart he might end up as a contractor hiring latinos to do the job. Obviously, he must learn the trade first.

2853a No.1993

>This option is good if OP is broke
Better yet, invaders fly under the radar all the time because they get paid in cash.

305d1 No.1994

File: 1575651033645-0.jpg (239.27 KB, 494x750, titantails1.jpg)

File: 1575651033645-1.jpg (323.07 KB, 662x1124, titantails2.jpg)

Vacation's still going. Has it really only been a day since I last posted? Yesterday felt like it lasted forever.
Sorry about the long post last time. That shit was energy drink, not booze. It shouldn't make me spill everything like that.
Took one monster energy drink late before yesterday's morning, remained awake instead of sleeping. Went to some charity stores to buy cheap vidya, saw the Ratchet and Clank PS3 games for real cheap and got them. Then took a bus to a place with some really nice forests. Even in the winter months, this natural beauty zone holds its power. But I still miss the air forests put out during the sunnier months.
Then half-slept in the corner of a library for four hours. It's the kind of sleep that feels like you pressed the Wait button and decided to Wait for a few hours. Resting, but ready to move at a moment's notice. Woke up and went home, slept before midnight (which is good because I normally have a terrible sleep schedule) and woke up at 4AM because I'm not used to full sleep sessions.
Read books and eventually felt sleepy, went to sleep at 7am today, woke up at 11am today. Checked the charity store again, nothing good added to the shelves today.
Now at home. Must have slipped into a parallel universe or made these three roommates important to my life's story by telling you about them, because all three were in the living room at once watching one of them play some Star Wars xbox game. Feel free to doubt this but there was this bit where you encounter a cliff, a spinny windmill with 2 ledges in front of you, and a cliff. The idiot knew he had to press the Slow button to slow down the spinner then run across the ledge, but he didn't know how to time this or hold still upon clearly getting the timing wrong. So he casted slow, jumped, ran as far as he could, failed and fell, died, and tried again.
Another Hentaifag roommate introduced me to the "No cock like horse cock" song on his phone, I've heard it before but I feigned shock. Pretending I'm new to the sins of the world makes me feel better about having seen everything when I was still just a child.
I offered to get one of my consoles and a multiplayer game like Smash Melee, Mario party, guilty gear, any of those. but nope, watching this guy run in circles and get his ass kicked by stormtroopers on what looked like easy mode (never played this game, I assume enemies miss less and react faster and wait less on hard) was fun for them.
So I joined in for a few minutes, then I got bored. Asked to have a go, played better than him while I figured the controls out.
This new star wars game is just wannabe-Uncharted and wannabe-Sekiro's baby but with force powers that negate all challenge. No style meter means no reason to be stylish, no Stinger or Launcher or real melee combos means no ability to be stylish. The indie game I'm developing is so much motherfucking cooler than this game. This game is so soulless and creatively sterile, so "Safe". It's the kind of normiefeed you'd expect Disney to push out in the name of maximum profit and what I expected Disney Stawaws to be, before they went way below my low expectations and went sublersive.
It's weird how working on creative projects feels like work even if you love the projects and love being creative, while talking about how fucking cool what you're making will be feels like masturbation in front of appreciative people cheering you on.
I assume there's a fetish for that but I refuse to check. There's probably a fanfiction of some pony jacking off in a crowded stadium here solely to see that.
Not sure what else to say.
I live a quiet life, quietly keeping my human thoughts to myself.
I'd be arrested if I ever spilled anything around anyone I hadn't already led to water and watched them drink and digest it over a long period of time, so to speak.
When I'm around the non-redpilled I want to redpill them. But when I'm around the redpilled I fear that I don't have anything to say politically except "Yeah, we're right! Fuck SJWs, fuck libtards, Hitler did nothing wrong!"
I fear this even though I know I do have good things to say usually.
Oh and a friend of mine emailed me because he was concerned about the fucked up shit in my Fequestria story. He was genuinely concerned for me, and afraid trying to make this terrible idea good broke me and this fucked-up story was my way of lashing out against the trashy fandom and the world. Call me a faggot if you want but someone showing legitimate concern for me brought a tear to my eye. I said to him "Thank you, but I'm fine. This story is fucked up because it's supposed to be. If a mother gets raped to death by her son onscreen, for example, it isn't a sign of some deep-seated mommy issues. It's because I thought putting that there would show off how fucking awful and rapey the evil rapist-filled village of Rapetonia is, so fans will celebrate when the heroes kill the rapists and burn Rapetonia down". He said "oh ok that makes sense" and said the disgusting scenes so far are pretty good. But the guy thought the hero not liking anal sex makes him a little bitch, and the guy didn't like the scene where the protagonist thinks about that time his girlfriend confessed to having the secret desire (and hating this fantasy desire and feeling like a bad girlfriend as a result) to be gangbanged like a modern degenerate woman.
I'm not sure what to think about that second thing.
If he's really got this bitch eating out of the palm of his hoof thanks to his amazing seductive charm, she shouldn't have any desires at all other than him, right?
But on the other hand, it's part of the story that the government wants the mares to be degenerates. Not even the Overmare's daughter is immune to the propaganda, even though she chooses to not be degenerate and instead commit to one man.
Another friend introduced me to a blog where an annoying libtard reacts to bad Sonic comics. Ken Penders trash, shit like Titan Tails.
Guess that's today's theme.

a7532 No.1995

Sounds like the vacation is helping.

>It's weird how working on creative projects feels like work even if you love the projects and love being creative, while talking about how fucking cool what you're making will be feels like masturbation in front of appreciative people cheering you on.

Yep that'a one of the problems with telling others everything about the creative work. You get the 'reward' before it's complete. Sometimes killing the motivation.
>I assume there's a fetish for that but I refuse to check.
There is a fetish for everything. But yes that is indeed a fetish.
>someone showing legitimate concern for me brought a tear to my eye.
That's normal. I can sit here, and say you need to be closer to more like minded friends that'll also stick with you through thick and thin. I can say that, but actually doing that?
>Everyone I know is fucking weird.
Everyone is weird.
>What would my imaginary future children and grandchildren think?
Everyone is fucking weird.
Well, most of the time they won't know about that, and if they do?
You'll first, and foremost be their Dad, or grandfather, or great grandfather.

305d1 No.1996

Thank you!
Once I tried drawing clop for myself but it just felt stupid. When I look at my art I only see the imperfections and a sense that there are more imperfections I can't see.

a7532 No.1997

I don't have much experience drawing, but making it anyways then making another that improves on the last as a sort of blueprint to guide yourself to the better product.

Label the imperfections, then list out solutions. Do-able solutions that you can enact.
You also need to have a sense of self kindness, because that will help.
However most things have to be in moderation so they won't become detrimental.

55e34 No.1998

File: 1575674165986.png (153.41 KB, 786x1015, rainbow_dash_thinking_by_x….png)

Is this a blog?

305d1 No.1999

Thank you! I awoke at 3AM after sleeping at an alright time. I guess I'll just sleep 6ish hours forever now. Anyway, I decided to redraw a character I'm making so she'll have hair that's easier to draw from all angles. Her elaborate anime hairstyle sounded good in my head but it's a pain to angle and animate properly.
Probably, but I'm not certain. This is a self-improvement board and I'm documenting my self-improvement journey on it. I didn't realize it until now, but this vacation was truly something I needed. It's refreshed me, and helped me rediscover my love for things outside of two things that had dominated my life for so long.

edbe5 No.2000

File: 1575694827084.jpg (37.75 KB, 600x600, trips.jpg)

>and helped me rediscover my love for things outside of two things that had dominated my life for so long.
I'm glad to read that. Expanding your awareness might be the stepping stone to open new gates.

305d1 No.2002

Another day of vacation. I wonder when I'll get back to work and throw ysfjfuebd
keyboard problems n on droin android hon ph


Anyway I wonder when I will get back to work and throw yself myself back nto into these trenches.
I've started writing again, that's good.
Also learning usi usicMUSIC SHIT. Watching a video on how to europop.
I read the entire HP Lovecraft series today, it's some good shit.

305d1 No.2003

Thank you.
Another day of my vacation. Is it natural to feel sleepy during most of winter? My 3pm naps are starting to take longer, so I should probably stop taking them.
Went for another peaceful walk through a peaceful forest. So empty and serene. Yet also so small, nothing compared to the larger forests out there.
I'm no hippie but I wish this world had more forests. Nature is ugly and chaotic on its own, but when guided by our hand and eye for beauty, nature is beautiful.
Added more weight to my exercise weights, still losing weight and still on protein. Will hopefully be ripped as fuck one day soon.

305d1 No.2004

Still alive, exercising is going well. Nothing much to say really.

4de80 No.2005

Happy to hear.

305d1 No.2006

I thought of something to add:
I'm developing a game that stars a character who can transform into other characters.
It's 2D, a sidescrolling MetroidVania.
But I can't decide if the main playable character should be able to Float, or if a dedicated transformation should handle that while also having a control scheme designed to take advantage of that.
When I say Float here I mean what Peach can do in Smash Bros Melee: If you Jump and hold the Jump button on the way down, you stop falling and float in place for up to two seconds. It halts all vertical momentum. You can slide forwards and back while doing this, and even throw out some midair attacks.
Letting the hero float means he loses that when he transforms, but it also means giving the hero something no other Metroidvania protag has.
Building a transformation around floating means players can whip out that floaty character at will and enjoy a control scheme built around it.

305d1 No.2007

Fuck it I'm doing both.

bfb78 No.2014

Doing both was a good call. This big brain video game is going to be so smart it will sell itself. I would coom money but it's deny dick december.

bfb78 No.2019

Still alive, had to redesign the main girl's hair to look good from all angles, not just the front angle.

bfb78 No.2021

Have I just traded one set of addictions for another? Broke my addictions to masturbating and sweets, stopped buying energy drinks and I thibk I should throw out the thirty outdatwd energy drinks left in my fridge even if they are unopened and canned. downloaded and watched some shit that had been on my "anime to watch" list for years. I read a chapter of a book daily, and exercise. But I'm also watching these "super important best ever" japanese animes at 2x speed, which means I end up watching 20 eps a day. Surely this much tv can't be healthy. Would I burn myself out by trying to push myself into Religously Healthy too hard too fast, if I broke all vices and just read books, used PC exclusively for creative endeavors, exercised, and nothing else? besides the friends shit where I hang out with friends sometimes, I probably shouldnt get rid of that.

a7532 No.2022

>Have I just traded one set of addictions for another?
In a sense that is all that we do.
See if the your quality of life is improving both in the long term, and short term.

bfb78 No.2023

This fucking hair is a pain. Doesn't look right from any angle.

bfb78 No.2025

Fixed the hair for real this time. Uploading pictures soon.
Also I am still doing no nut and I didn't eat any sugar today.
My balls feel empty even though I have not nutted in over a month. This is weird. It's like the "waves of mad mating lust" sensation that comes and goes when horny has abandoned me completely. Is that normal?

bfb78 No.2026

Clarification, I no longer get horny.

19399 No.2027

File: 1576549103997.jpg (66.25 KB, 640x480, 20151013_GEORGEWBUSHAXISOF….jpg)

Yeah, this all definitely seems like a lame grasp for attention blog.
No offense, but exploiting the fact that some people might be sympathetic to an anon who by all indication is at wits end is pretty pathetic. Using that as an excuse to narrate your banal life is even worse.
That right there. Do you really think anyone cares what your sex drive is? Does it strike you as relevant? Are people asking about it? This isn't facebook, faggot. Nor,… pick your social media platform.
Got issues? Need help not necking yourself? No one to talk to?
You might find sympathy here.
Looking for attention and personal aggrandisement because of Ben 10 or YuGiOh or WTFE else you're into isn't cutting it?
Neck yourself.

320a6 No.2029

File: 1576549875609.jpg (131.33 KB, 723x1034, Awake!.jpg)

Yes, it is.
Your brain is shaping itself to the new normal. In psychology that lost of interest in sex is called "libido sublimation" in which the energy before expended in lust now is redirected to creative enterprises; it is a fundamental pillar of the Übermensch.
However, this stage is ultra dangerous because a sudden and minimal sexual stimulation can make you to relapse unexpectedly.

320a6 No.2030

File: 1576550429098.png (453.96 KB, 1024x606, looking for bolcheviks.png)

>This isn't facebook, faggot
That's rite nigger.
This is /ub/, the temple of self improvement.
Go back to leddit commie jew. Like it or not, the tide is turning and for Kek you'll pay.

bfb78 No.2031

Thank you. This might make me sound like a faggot but I was afraid I'd broken something.
I lived my whole life as a masturbation-addicted abused brainwashed faggot. Sabotaged from day one by the jew, my homeland, and my own family, but that's no excuse. I'm alone now, I can heal stronger. Rebuilding myself into a better person has been a long and difficult journey, and I don't know if I'll ever be done with it.
Wrote some pony fanfic words today for the first time in a while. I thought there would come a day when I would miss pony writing during my vacation and throw myself back into the trenches, but it never came. So I'm forcing myself to write shit and rewrite it into quality writing later as the writing guides tell me.

bfb78 No.2032

Thinking of trying a bodybuilding workout challenge. 30 days, 90 days, those ones.
I'm already doing nofap and I've hit the "Why do I so strongly miss wanting to nut" stage.

bfb78 No.2033

File: 1576736174198.jpg (83.58 KB, 724x1024, bdde07f389d258076e5dbb39b7….jpg)

Fuck hit New Reply too soon.
What number day challenge do you recommend?

a7532 No.2034

Not sure but based on what you posted is what I'm basing my guess off of.
Do a quick test. See how many perfect (form matters first) push-ups, sit-ups, squats, punches you can do. In a set amount of time. Then see how long you can do them for.

That will be your baseline. After that is following the chart from the start. An increase of 20 reps for sit-ups and push-ups with 50 for squats and 100 for punches.

>Thinking of trying a bodybuilding workout challenge.
Make sure you have a good diet, the material you are sculpting your body with, and enough energy so your body isn't trying to cannibalize other parts of your body.

As long as you start something then switch to one that suits your needs better may be easier than not doing the work out at first.

bfb78 No.2035

This is going well so far.
Also I redpilled someone by showing him Bob To The Future. No more commie idiocy from him.
I want to believe I can make a positive difference in this world.

bfb78 No.2036

Still alive, nothing to report.

1e8c9 No.2037

File: 1577134303972.png (27.06 KB, 399x332, thinkhang.png)

bfb78 No.2038

Hey, cute pony. I didn't want peopple worrying about me but making a
>oh gee exercising sure is hard but i will keep going
post seemed stupid.
By the way I was thinking.
What if Twilight fucking hated the idea of Silver selling magic enchanted bullshit in his store?
Just imagine spending your whole life learning to cast spells
You git gud.
Then this smug fucker comes along selling power.
now some filly can do max level spells 12 times a day with the aid of an amulet or magic piece of underwear
It would add conflict to the story. Suddenly the smart sexy mage has something about him the other smart sexy mage does not like.
Then again Twilight is too smart to be so fucking completely wrong like that, right?
Not sure what to do.

bfb78 No.2039

I love you guys! Merry christmas, my beloved white friends.

4de80 No.2040

Merry Christmas to you too

a7532 No.2041

Merry Christmas!

320a6 No.2042

File: 1577239800472.jpg (445.17 KB, 2048x1492, nresnene.jpg)

Merry Christmas poners.

bfb78 No.2043

Thank you!
I'm going to a party with some friends today, but I won't drink.

bfb78 No.2044

Bucks Fizz probably doesnt count as booze, right?
Anyway party sucked but I ate a proper christmas meal and it was nice. They had a piano so I played Smash Mouth All Star. I only know 4 piano songs.
My gifts to myself: exercise weights, clothes that fit my new body, shelves for my book and vidya collection to clean my room.
Gifts from others: chocolate and lots of it.
Went home and watched Treasure Planet. It's such a good film. I wish I could make my Silver Star fic that good, but I'm starting to think that's just not possible.

930f1 No.2048

Sticking to a routine felt hard at first. But now, knowing I'll be even stronger and healthier tomorrow makes it all worth it and gives me something to look forward to.

930f1 No.2068


f031a No.2073

File: 1578496801942.png (1.18 KB, 131x54, Pokemon Team base.png)

Exercise is good.
What exercises should I do on leg day? So far I've just been squatting with freeweights up on my shoulders.
Ignore pic, was going to post meme but filetype wasnt recognized

2e2d8 No.2113

Exercise break is going great.
Thank you for letting me talk about this here.
I've been thinking that while I hate the Jew a lot I dont know much about white accomplishments. I want to love my people, but I have no connection to my people. Where can I learn redpilled pro white facts?

9e1e1 No.2116

File: 1579958236996.pdf (9.56 MB, March of the Titans; A His….pdf)

Haven't read it myself but this is quite a comprehensive history and it may be what you're looking for. Simply reading a non-Marxist book on history or scientific inventions works as well.

2e2d8 No.2117

Thank you! This is excellent.

2e2d8 No.2241

It's me OP and I finally finished an art project that took me months to complete!
Now I can get started on making the game!

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