/ub/ - Überhengst

Becoming better

If you want to see the latest posts from all boards in a convenient way please check out /overboard/

By clicking New Reply, I acknowledge the existence of the Israeli nuclear arsenal.
Select File / Oekaki
Password (For file and/or post deletion.)

I need to change my life
1959 1960 1961 1962 1964 1976 1980 1987 1993 2436 2445
Hello, I don't know how to start this but here goes.
I think I need to change my life.
Dealing with people is exhausting on its own. But dealing with childish faggy egomaniacs who want to "win" internet arguments and get that precious fucking social credit clout and a sense of pride and accomplishment is even more exhausting.
And it seems the latter is the only kind of person I meet online any more. They're so angry, all the time. So poisonous and spiteful, constantly trying to piss you off. It's not...
This might sound weird.
It's not tiresome or annoying any more.
I don't like how routine this has become.
Endure the pseudointellectualism of this faggot and let him pretend he's clever, say no u when the other one calls you a faggot, imagine yourself rolling your eyes when this different faggot wastes hours of his own life trying to bully you on a website you don't care about and then pretends he's got a deep moral lesson to teach you and it's your fault his gay uncle gave him AIDS.
They're so desperate to feel like they can win something. Even if it's faggy internet "drama" Boomer office-politics retardity.
I'm sick of mudbrained niggers raging at me for not liking their new Star Wars movies or new Hasbro(tm) brand shit or new SwSh incomplete games. I'm sick of trying to justify myself to consumernigger podfaggot pigpeople who will never admit humans have a right to have tastes and standards.
This place is pretty good, but just this place. Everywhere else is full of niggers.
Politics is exhausting. Boomers and their parents deserve a new holocaust for what they allowed the Jews to do to us. Liberals aren't human and I'm sick of pretending I'm shocked when they shit debates up. It's a black and white issue, no pun intended, how the fuck do so many people find this so hard to understand? Politics feels like a lost cause. No one person every week I redpill can make up for the legions bluepilled by Jew schools. Conformity to faggotry is the faggot's religion.
I have hatred for the Jews. It's an insult that fanfags think I hate their subpar product as much as I hate Jews, and it's depressing that they hate me even more than I hate Jews. Hate for me consumes their every waking thought, I only think of Jews during politics time and whenever I see evidence of their fuckery.
I've got other hobbies, I exercise and diet now, and everything besides dealing with pony and politics is rewarding and fun. I've lost so much weight my stomach is almost flat. I've never been this light in my life.
I should be happy. And I am. I'm legitimately proud of my body now.
I'm proud of who I am. 90% of who I am, anyway.
I'm usually happy, which makes the contrast more noticeable when I put myself through this faggy online bullshit.
And I don't know why I do that.
I try to do what's right.
I try to have good optics and win debates and help people see the light.
Is there a non-pozzed Christian forum out there where I'm allowed to say Feminism is cancer and fuck Jews?
Is Christianity as a whole a lost cause? Was I an idiot for going back to it?
I miss when I could say "I like MLP" just like I miss when I could say "I like Star Wars". Modernity is depressing and I feel like a faggot who wants to wallow in muh childish nostalgia forever instead of getting on with his own life and making something worth a damn.
I want to fully become someone I can be proud of, and I don't see any reason to see "dedication" to hasjew products as something to admire.
Sometimes being in this fandom is suffering. All the sites are full of fanfags. And I don't know why I put myself through it. Habit? Tradition?
I don't know what I expect to gain out of posting this.
But here it is.
I think I need to spend less time on pony and politics, or find a way to make time spent on these things better for the soul.
1960 1961
... processing...
You're not alone anon. Sit tight
>find a way to make time spent on these things better for the soul.
You might need a vacation...
Cutting off the faggots, and kikes. Just some time for you.
I... I don't know how I can help here, but I'm here to listen,
and these
Anons care too.
Take a break, anon.
Watch some wholesome stuff like mlp and stop using the internet for social interaction for a while, get the poison and faggots out of your system.
Now remember it is people that generate this kind of situation, you can always just cut a conversation and walk away if you're not feeling like it, arguing with retards has no point.

Also you dont have to stand pseudointelectual faggots, calling them on their bullshit is both fun for you and good for them in the long run.
Dont take retards at heart, it can only hurt you.
>arguing with retards has no point
jack daniels_mare_solo_to.png
>Politics feels like a lost cause. No one person every week I redpill can make up for the legions bluepilled by Jew schools.
It depends from where are you observing. Politics as well "democracy" is a rigged jewish game, but to cause mayhem among the kikes and their golems is most of the time rewarding. In regard to the redpilling, be assured this is the most successful grassroot propaganda operation in history, thanks to the internet the people's voice can be heard and no wonder the kikes and the (((UN))) want to regulate it and if needed shut down. Look around, the politicians and tech monopolies are taking at heart the Jewish mandate to silence the people's counter narrative.
So, don't be surprised that after the 2020 reelection a crackdown against wrong thinking will come. Just step aside a look at how the normals react, it will be very entertaining.

>Conformity to faggotry is the faggot's religion.
I love this phrase, it deserves to be memed.

>I try to have good optics and win debates and help people see the light
>help people
I think this is the wrong approach because you will end up burnt.
Remember, lemmings will not move their comfy asses and therefore deserve nothing, however, they are material to agitate and propel against the kikes and specially the infrastructure keeping them in power: The System.

>I don't know what I expect to gain out of posting this.
I believe a little push to take distance and regain clarity.
Poner, you are dismissed for the time being. Go and take care of yourself, the world will keep spinning anyway.

>help people
A wise anon once told me "dont teach people, guide them to the lake"
As in do not try to change someone but push them into the right direction so the current does the job for you.
1974 1980
Thank you. I'm going to take a short vacation from politics and rewatch the old FIM while also watching old shows.

Day 1 of my vacation has passed. So far it's very relaxing but what do I do about the "I am wasting my time and I should be doing x right now" sensation?
You quite simply need to learn to ignore shit and step away from arguments. The internet is dominated by retards and faggots; it always has been and always will be. It's okay to let them think they're right, because it doesn't affect you.
Arguing with faggots online is a lost cause. Save your energy and look away for people who are worth your time to chat with.

And if you're the kind of person who has to win internet arguments to feel a fleeting sense of gratification, you might be slowly turning into a pseudo-intellectual internet faggot yourself.

tl;dr just chill, m8.
Day 2. I went for a calming walk in a forest somewhere and watched some cartoons from my childhood when I got home.

This is nice.
1981 1984
Good luck OP, I'll be following in your footsteps. When I'm out of state, I'll be watching the show, doing some self help work of my own, reading through my book collection, helping grandpa maintain his ranch and such. Hoping that things work out well for me, but no guarantees yet.
>reading through my book collection
This helps a lot.
Day 3 of my vacation.
It dawned upon me that barely anything changed compared to what little I accomplished before and after my vacation started. My motivation and dedication had been missing for a while now.
Only difference is, I'm politics and pony-free for a while.
But today, things changed a little. I got motivation to try and work on something I'd given up hope on. I made a tiny amount of progress, then got tempted into switching to working on something easier. Work is still work, right?
In other news I've been keeping up my daily exercises even though I'm on vacation. I think I'll go to the forest again today, it's real empty during the winter months.
I also saw this BlackPilled video about some hoarder faggot.
I'm afraid I might be becoming a hoarder.
I feel the urge to hold onto all my possessions just in case I might need them, and when I do get money I feel the urge to spend it on shit that seems useful and could be sold for value in an emergency.
I don't know how to deal with that, but at least I don't hoard my trash or put myself into debt or buy pointless toys. I have no Funko Pops or anime figurines or Amiibos or Skylanders or Disney Infinity toys or any shit like that, and I'm proud of that.
I clean my room regularly, too.
Right now my temptations to buy X are saying "Buy consoles homebrewed to run all their games using hard drives!" because one of my friends has a Wii homebrewed like that and it's pretty cool.
Should I indulge in that urge? I don't want to be a videogame addict, but making video games is my lifelong dream and I've got great ideas for video games I can refine by playing other games in their genres. And one amazing idea I'm putting in my current project was inspired by a shit game I played a few months ago.
I kept thinking "Why didn't the devs just code it like this?" and then I thought I should code it like that. So I will when I get around to it.
Fanfics for pony, abandoned fanfics for nonpony stuff like Pokemon, art, animation, my tulpa's original story, indie game projects... I should make some tough choices about which of these things I should cut out of my life so I can focus on what'll make me happy and successful. I know those two things aren't connected but my dream is to make video games, writing and drawing were hobbies I picked up along the way. And writing doesn't feel much like a hobby any more, it feels like a chore.
Good idea. I wish I had cool family members with cool stuff like farms. I've got a downloaded book collection (which is tooootally legal if you catch what i'm saying) and a collection of books from a local charity store, and I should start actually reading these things regularly instead of just hoarding them.
>I feel the urge to hold onto all my possessions just in case I might need them, and when I do get money I feel the urge to spend it on shit that seems useful and could be sold for value in an emergency.
>Right now my temptations to buy X

Well I'd sort whatever positive cash flow into three or four piles.
First short term expenses that MUST be paid.
Second emergency expenses when life will take a shit.
Third long term expenses so that being able to live that long it won't suck.
Fourth is whatever you want to use it for.

For short term the exact amount or higher. All expenses taxes, water, food, electricity, ect.
Then split the remaining money roughly 80% for emergency/long term and 20% for long term/expendable.

This is just a really rough guide line.
Thank you, that's good advice.
If you could choose one console to get, homebrew-hack, and then get all the games for it ever on a hard drive connected to it, what would you choose?
Personally I'm eyeing the PS3 since I never had one of those and I hear barely any of its games have been ported to the PS4. Which I already have, but it isn't homebrewed because it was too new for the known homebrew tricks last time I checked. I only have a handful of bargain-bin preowned PS4 games, but they're good ones.
Day 4 of my vacation.
Had a dream where I discovered the ability to float like Peach from Smash Bros only everyone suddenly also had it and thought it was normal, and they also thought I was crazy for thinking it's something new I "discovered". I shrugged and said "Just kidding lol" and floated to the grocery store to buy milk. Had a very normal day aside from the floating, which felt great.
Then I woke up, and laughed over what a weird dream that was.
The sound of my own genuine laughter feels really nice without its usual forced or stressed undertone.
I'm not sure how long this should last but between exercising right, sleeping right and doing what I enjoy instead of raging over politics, I feel happy and healthy.
Went to the forest for real this time, sniffed like a hamon user, jogged some laps around its twisting paths.
Then went to a nearby friend's house and played some vidya. Got him to cancel all £90 worth of his subscriptions by showing him how to REALLY use his amazon fire stick. Why is it called a stick when it's more of a box hanging out of the TV's side awkwardly?
Watched a ton of One Piece anime together. Was then introduced to Meta Runner. God I wish that were me.
Went home and finished marathonning My Life as a Teenage Robot. As a kid, I had a fucking massive crush on her. I feel a bit silly about that, but not as silly as I feel about the even bigger crush I had on Twilight Sparkle as a teenager and young adult.
I believe in you.
1990 1991 1995
Thank you.
Another day of vacation. Sometimes I catch myself thinking to myself how fucking evil the Jews are. I remind myself to stop because I already know this. It's not like repeating this to myself in different ways gives me ideas for political memes.
Finished watching Danny Phantom, S3 felt very cartoonish compared to the previous two seasons. And Vlad lost all his ominous cred with this "annoying next door Squidward who's also the mayor" bullshit. The morals also feel very forced, with characters narrating lessons right to the audience's faces way too often. Why does S3e1 feature Danny talking to a character he doesn't meet until the next episode? E1 is written as if he already met this guy but E2 shows him meeting the guy and gaining the Infinimap, which is somewhat important to the rest of the story arc. That's a cool under utilized concept. Half the Tardis in a scroll, a map that takes you and shows you anywhere. Neat.
Designed another character for my indie game. This one is also a hot babe.
You know how some people bitch about how many fantasy races have sexy women and monsterous males?
Sometimes I consider a mix of both approaches for my work. Some races have hot men and ugly women, some have ugly men and hot women. Some have ugly both and some have hot both.
Then again, my game's main character is a hot babe with huge tits. So anyone I would impress with that design choice would be too titty triggered to appreciate this.
I know I shouldn't think on politics during my break but if you got PETA pissed off about Halal islamic animal cruelty meat that would kick up a ruckus and redpill some about halal meat. They're currently mad over some twitch thot fucking her dog and throwing her cat, or something. The degenerate.
It's funny. The stereotype says crazy cat ladies are bad... but crazy dog ladies train their dogs to lick them out. That's bad too.
Jesus fucking christ, this world is so disgusting sometimes.
sometimes i feel like a kid with outdated oversensitive morals
and sometimes i feel like the last adult alive on a planet of shit eaters.
I know you guys don't eat shit, you aren't gay. My head knows I'm not alone but my heart wishes I had more friends.
Everyone I know is fucking weird. Everyone, except for two new friends I don't know all that well yet. I don't resent them for being weird and I should probably be flattered that people let down all their masks around my honest simple ass but sometimes it just stuns you. It catches you off guard, you know? You go from barely knowing someone to knowing he pisses out of his window before bed every night. Why do you know this? Because he casually told you during a smash melee netplay session.
I just...
I sometimes feel like I'm the only sane one I know, even though I know that's stupid and I have at least 4 sane friends.
Also I took a Monster Energy Drink for the first time yesterday. Downed it in under a minute, it felt cold and rotten in my stomach for hours. Only now, a few hours after downing it, is any sort of twitchiness kicking in. I'm no cartoon character but this feels kind of nice. Feelings rushing through my body. Energy. I don't want to get addicted to these, but these things feel strong and taste like ass. Call me a purefag and poorfag but I normally drink water purified at home. Was curious how this one tasted. Like cheap 30p by the litre cola is the answer. Who the hell can drink this drug daily?
Holy fucking shit how much did I write?
I guess I'm fucking a cartoon character after all.
typo but I still want to fuck Twilight Sparkle.
Sometimes I get the urge to commission porn of my OC with her but I don't do it. I've got real shit I need to spend money on. I've never done that before anyway. Wouldn't know where to begin or who to hire. Whoever draws those Lyra with the floaty glowy gold magic hands fucking two ponies, I saw porn of that once, that guy's pretty good. Still on a no nut streak. I don't want to break it. And I'd probably never live down the enbarassment of doing something so degenerate. What would my imaginary future children and grandchildren think?
Fuck I'll probably never have those, I'm 23 going on 24 and still a jobless virgin. I've got neet roommates who thankfully stay in their own hentaifag rooms but I could never bring a woman in here.
Fuck me I'm still going. Still writing.
I'm not a fucking cartoon character, I need to stop.
Oh also this one friend of mine showed me this Family Guy Speedrun video, a parody of real speedrun videos and explanations. The bullshit about "the end flag being loaded second" was funny, but he said all speedrunning videos make no sense to him.
Fucking normie, how can he not understand the subtle genius of parallel universes and QPUs in Mario?
It's explained so simply even someone like me who doesn't own the game can understand it.
also I wish I had the power to save the world.
I wish I could motivate people back into caring and trying to make this world a better place.
I try to play therapist for my friends, but I don't know why I can't do this for myself.
Why can't I solve my own problems? Why can't I stop being a lazy faggot, asked the guy who quit his lifelong masturbation and sweets addiction and lost fucktons of weight but didn't write as many pointless trashy pony fanfic words as he wanted to?
What the fuck is my life.
Maybe this vacation is so I can take a step back and re examine everything.
>Hitler dubs
>sometimes i feel like a kid with outdated oversensitive morals
Naturally, everybody around have been corrupted by the kike poison.
The redpilling is what make you see the real world, it isn't pretty but discouraging, but it is what it is.
>Everyone, except for two new friends I don't know all that well yet
Allow me to give you my expertise, don't put your chips on friends, but only yourself.
>I'm 23 going on 24 and still a jobless virgin.
Again my expertise, or better my experience.
1- Age: You have the right age to begin to do your thing; meaning to be independent and don't take any drag along with you, literally.
2- Jobless: A job usually means to enslave yourself to another man for some coins for a sandwich. I believe you must become the jew and begin to barter stuff, or if that is not profitable or possible, LEARN A TRADE.
Befriend a latino and find out how to get a sweaty job, in the worst case scenario you will descend into the brute universe but with at least 100 bucks a day. The point is to make some capital.
3- Virgin: Who cares. I know you won't believe me, buuuuuuut trust me, all pussies are the same, just a wet hole with potential diseases, and the woman carrying that hole is hardwired by the Creator to be a parasite and a pain in your ass. Stay away for the time being.
Poner, your future as a human being is not marked for your success with whores, but, your will and determination to become financially solvent.
pony math.jpg
And because I don't want you to go in circles thinking about friends, women, and the contemplation of your life, let me go straight to the cheese to turn around your life:
>>>/mlpol/248789 →
>Might Is Right - Or the Survival of the Fittest - by Ragnar Redbeard - (1896)

In case you have not desire or time to read, an audiobook is available:
>Might is Right - Ragnar Redbeard - AUDIOBOOK - Part 1 of 3
>Might is Right - Ragnar Redbeard - AUDIOBOOK - Part 2 of 3
>Might is Right - Ragnar Redbeard - AUDIOBOOK - Part 3 of 3
>Befriend a latino and find out how to get a sweaty job
This option is good if OP is broke, for sure he will learn construction and who knows, if he is smart he might end up as a contractor hiring latinos to do the job. Obviously, he must learn the trade first.
>This option is good if OP is broke
Better yet, invaders fly under the radar all the time because they get paid in cash.
Vacation's still going. Has it really only been a day since I last posted? Yesterday felt like it lasted forever.
Sorry about the long post last time. That shit was energy drink, not booze. It shouldn't make me spill everything like that.
Took one monster energy drink late before yesterday's morning, remained awake instead of sleeping. Went to some charity stores to buy cheap vidya, saw the Ratchet and Clank PS3 games for real cheap and got them. Then took a bus to a place with some really nice forests. Even in the winter months, this natural beauty zone holds its power. But I still miss the air forests put out during the sunnier months.
Then half-slept in the corner of a library for four hours. It's the kind of sleep that feels like you pressed the Wait button and decided to Wait for a few hours. Resting, but ready to move at a moment's notice. Woke up and went home, slept before midnight (which is good because I normally have a terrible sleep schedule) and woke up at 4AM because I'm not used to full sleep sessions.
Read books and eventually felt sleepy, went to sleep at 7am today, woke up at 11am today. Checked the charity store again, nothing good added to the shelves today.
Now at home. Must have slipped into a parallel universe or made these three roommates important to my life's story by telling you about them, because all three were in the living room at once watching one of them play some Star Wars xbox game. Feel free to doubt this but there was this bit where you encounter a cliff, a spinny windmill with 2 ledges in front of you, and a cliff. The idiot knew he had to press the Slow button to slow down the spinner then run across the ledge, but he didn't know how to time this or hold still upon clearly getting the timing wrong. So he casted slow, jumped, ran as far as he could, failed and fell, died, and tried again.
Another Hentaifag roommate introduced me to the "No cock like horse cock" song on his phone, I've heard it before but I feigned shock. Pretending I'm new to the sins of the world makes me feel better about having seen everything when I was still just a child.
I offered to get one of my consoles and a multiplayer game like Smash Melee, Mario party, guilty gear, any of those. but nope, watching this guy run in circles and get his ass kicked by stormtroopers on what looked like easy mode (never played this game, I assume enemies miss less and react faster and wait less on hard) was fun for them.
So I joined in for a few minutes, then I got bored. Asked to have a go, played better than him while I figured the controls out.
This new star wars game is just wannabe-Uncharted and wannabe-Sekiro's baby but with force powers that negate all challenge. No style meter means no reason to be stylish, no Stinger or Launcher or real melee combos means no ability to be stylish. The indie game I'm developing is so much motherfucking cooler than this game. This game is so soulless and creatively sterile, so "Safe". It's the kind of normiefeed you'd expect Disney to push out in the name of maximum profit and what I expected Disney Stawaws to be, before they went way below my low expectations and went sublersive.
It's weird how working on creative projects feels like work even if you love the projects and love being creative, while talking about how fucking cool what you're making will be feels like masturbation in front of appreciative people cheering you on.
I assume there's a fetish for that but I refuse to check. There's probably a fanfiction of some pony jacking off in a crowded stadium here solely to see that.
Not sure what else to say.
I live a quiet life, quietly keeping my human thoughts to myself.
I'd be arrested if I ever spilled anything around anyone I hadn't already led to water and watched them drink and digest it over a long period of time, so to speak.
When I'm around the non-redpilled I want to redpill them. But when I'm around the redpilled I fear that I don't have anything to say politically except "Yeah, we're right! Fuck SJWs, fuck libtards, Hitler did nothing wrong!"
I fear this even though I know I do have good things to say usually.
Oh and a friend of mine emailed me because he was concerned about the fucked up shit in my Fequestria story. He was genuinely concerned for me, and afraid trying to make this terrible idea good broke me and this fucked-up story was my way of lashing out against the trashy fandom and the world. Call me a faggot if you want but someone showing legitimate concern for me brought a tear to my eye. I said to him "Thank you, but I'm fine. This story is fucked up because it's supposed to be. If a mother gets raped to death by her son onscreen, for example, it isn't a sign of some deep-seated mommy issues. It's because I thought putting that there would show off how fucking awful and rapey the evil rapist-filled village of Rapetonia is, so fans will celebrate when the heroes kill the rapists and burn Rapetonia down". He said "oh ok that makes sense" and said the disgusting scenes so far are pretty good. But the guy thought the hero not liking anal sex makes him a little bitch, and the guy didn't like the scene where the protagonist thinks about that time his girlfriend confessed to having the secret desire (and hating this fantasy desire and feeling like a bad girlfriend as a result) to be gangbanged like a modern degenerate woman.
I'm not sure what to think about that second thing.
If he's really got this bitch eating out of the palm of his hoof thanks to his amazing seductive charm, she shouldn't have any desires at all other than him, right?
But on the other hand, it's part of the story that the government wants the mares to be degenerates. Not even the Overmare's daughter is immune to the propaganda, even though she chooses to not be degenerate and instead commit to one man.
Another friend introduced me to a blog where an annoying libtard reacts to bad Sonic comics. Ken Penders trash, shit like Titan Tails.
Guess that's today's theme.
Sounds like the vacation is helping.

>It's weird how working on creative projects feels like work even if you love the projects and love being creative, while talking about how fucking cool what you're making will be feels like masturbation in front of appreciative people cheering you on.
Yep that'a one of the problems with telling others everything about the creative work. You get the 'reward' before it's complete. Sometimes killing the motivation.
>I assume there's a fetish for that but I refuse to check.
There is a fetish for everything. But yes that is indeed a fetish.
>someone showing legitimate concern for me brought a tear to my eye.
That's normal. I can sit here, and say you need to be closer to more like minded friends that'll also stick with you through thick and thin. I can say that, but actually doing that?
>Everyone I know is fucking weird.
Everyone is weird.
>What would my imaginary future children and grandchildren think?
Everyone is fucking weird.
Well, most of the time they won't know about that, and if they do?
You'll first, and foremost be their Dad, or grandfather, or great grandfather.
Thank you!
Once I tried drawing clop for myself but it just felt stupid. When I look at my art I only see the imperfections and a sense that there are more imperfections I can't see.
I don't have much experience drawing, but making it anyways then making another that improves on the last as a sort of blueprint to guide yourself to the better product.

Label the imperfections, then list out solutions. Do-able solutions that you can enact.
You also need to have a sense of self kindness, because that will help.
However most things have to be in moderation so they won't become detrimental.
Is this a blog?
Thank you! I awoke at 3AM after sleeping at an alright time. I guess I'll just sleep 6ish hours forever now. Anyway, I decided to redraw a character I'm making so she'll have hair that's easier to draw from all angles. Her elaborate anime hairstyle sounded good in my head but it's a pain to angle and animate properly.
Probably, but I'm not certain. This is a self-improvement board and I'm documenting my self-improvement journey on it. I didn't realize it until now, but this vacation was truly something I needed. It's refreshed me, and helped me rediscover my love for things outside of two things that had dominated my life for so long.
>and helped me rediscover my love for things outside of two things that had dominated my life for so long.
I'm glad to read that. Expanding your awareness might be the stepping stone to open new gates.
Another day of vacation. I wonder when I'll get back to work and throw ysfjfuebd
keyboard problems n on droin android hon ph


Anyway I wonder when I will get back to work and throw yself myself back nto into these trenches.
I've started writing again, that's good.
Also learning usi usicMUSIC SHIT. Watching a video on how to europop.
I read the entire HP Lovecraft series today, it's some good shit.
Thank you.
Another day of my vacation. Is it natural to feel sleepy during most of winter? My 3pm naps are starting to take longer, so I should probably stop taking them.
Went for another peaceful walk through a peaceful forest. So empty and serene. Yet also so small, nothing compared to the larger forests out there.
I'm no hippie but I wish this world had more forests. Nature is ugly and chaotic on its own, but when guided by our hand and eye for beauty, nature is beautiful.
Added more weight to my exercise weights, still losing weight and still on protein. Will hopefully be ripped as fuck one day soon.
Still alive, exercising is going well. Nothing much to say really.
Happy to hear.
I thought of something to add:
I'm developing a game that stars a character who can transform into other characters.
It's 2D, a sidescrolling MetroidVania.
But I can't decide if the main playable character should be able to Float, or if a dedicated transformation should handle that while also having a control scheme designed to take advantage of that.
When I say Float here I mean what Peach can do in Smash Bros Melee: If you Jump and hold the Jump button on the way down, you stop falling and float in place for up to two seconds. It halts all vertical momentum. You can slide forwards and back while doing this, and even throw out some midair attacks.
Letting the hero float means he loses that when he transforms, but it also means giving the hero something no other Metroidvania protag has.
Building a transformation around floating means players can whip out that floaty character at will and enjoy a control scheme built around it.
Fuck it I'm doing both.
Doing both was a good call. This big brain video game is going to be so smart it will sell itself. I would coom money but it's deny dick december.
Still alive, had to redesign the main girl's hair to look good from all angles, not just the front angle.
Have I just traded one set of addictions for another? Broke my addictions to masturbating and sweets, stopped buying energy drinks and I thibk I should throw out the thirty outdatwd energy drinks left in my fridge even if they are unopened and canned. downloaded and watched some shit that had been on my "anime to watch" list for years. I read a chapter of a book daily, and exercise. But I'm also watching these "super important best ever" japanese animes at 2x speed, which means I end up watching 20 eps a day. Surely this much tv can't be healthy. Would I burn myself out by trying to push myself into Religously Healthy too hard too fast, if I broke all vices and just read books, used PC exclusively for creative endeavors, exercised, and nothing else? besides the friends shit where I hang out with friends sometimes, I probably shouldnt get rid of that.
>Have I just traded one set of addictions for another?
In a sense that is all that we do.
See if the your quality of life is improving both in the long term, and short term.
This fucking hair is a pain. Doesn't look right from any angle.
2026 2029
Fixed the hair for real this time. Uploading pictures soon.
Also I am still doing no nut and I didn't eat any sugar today.
My balls feel empty even though I have not nutted in over a month. This is weird. It's like the "waves of mad mating lust" sensation that comes and goes when horny has abandoned me completely. Is that normal?
Clarification, I no longer get horny.
Yeah, this all definitely seems like a lame grasp for attention blog.
No offense, but exploiting the fact that some people might be sympathetic to an anon who by all indication is at wits end is pretty pathetic. Using that as an excuse to narrate your banal life is even worse.
That right there. Do you really think anyone cares what your sex drive is? Does it strike you as relevant? Are people asking about it? This isn't facebook, faggot. Nor,... pick your social media platform.
Got issues? Need help not necking yourself? No one to talk to?
You might find sympathy here.
Looking for attention and personal aggrandisement because of Ben 10 or YuGiOh or WTFE else you're into isn't cutting it?
Neck yourself.

Yes, it is.
Your brain is shaping itself to the new normal. In psychology that lost of interest in sex is called "libido sublimation" in which the energy before expended in lust now is redirected to creative enterprises; it is a fundamental pillar of the Übermensch.
However, this stage is ultra dangerous because a sudden and minimal sexual stimulation can make you to relapse unexpectedly.
looking for bolcheviks.png
>This isn't facebook, faggot
That's rite nigger.
This is /ub/, the temple of self improvement.
Go back to leddit commie jew. Like it or not, the tide is turning and for Kek you'll pay.
Thank you. This might make me sound like a faggot but I was afraid I'd broken something.
I lived my whole life as a masturbation-addicted abused brainwashed faggot. Sabotaged from day one by the jew, my homeland, and my own family, but that's no excuse. I'm alone now, I can heal stronger. Rebuilding myself into a better person has been a long and difficult journey, and I don't know if I'll ever be done with it.
Wrote some pony fanfic words today for the first time in a while. I thought there would come a day when I would miss pony writing during my vacation and throw myself back into the trenches, but it never came. So I'm forcing myself to write shit and rewrite it into quality writing later as the writing guides tell me.
2033 2034
Thinking of trying a bodybuilding workout challenge. 30 days, 90 days, those ones.
I'm already doing nofap and I've hit the "Why do I so strongly miss wanting to nut" stage.

Fuck hit New Reply too soon.
What number day challenge do you recommend?
Not sure but based on what you posted is what I'm basing my guess off of.
Do a quick test. See how many perfect (form matters first) push-ups, sit-ups, squats, punches you can do. In a set amount of time. Then see how long you can do them for.

That will be your baseline. After that is following the chart from the start. An increase of 20 reps for sit-ups and push-ups with 50 for squats and 100 for punches.

>Thinking of trying a bodybuilding workout challenge.
Make sure you have a good diet, the material you are sculpting your body with, and enough energy so your body isn't trying to cannibalize other parts of your body.

As long as you start something then switch to one that suits your needs better may be easier than not doing the work out at first.
This is going well so far.
Also I redpilled someone by showing him Bob To The Future. No more commie idiocy from him.
I want to believe I can make a positive difference in this world.
Still alive, nothing to report.

Hey, cute pony. I didn't want peopple worrying about me but making a
>oh gee exercising sure is hard but i will keep going
post seemed stupid.
By the way I was thinking.
What if Twilight fucking hated the idea of Silver selling magic enchanted bullshit in his store?
Just imagine spending your whole life learning to cast spells
You git gud.
Then this smug fucker comes along selling power.
now some filly can do max level spells 12 times a day with the aid of an amulet or magic piece of underwear
It would add conflict to the story. Suddenly the smart sexy mage has something about him the other smart sexy mage does not like.
Then again Twilight is too smart to be so fucking completely wrong like that, right?
Not sure what to do.
2040 2041
I love you guys! Merry christmas, my beloved white friends.
Merry Christmas to you too
Merry Christmas!
Merry Christmas poners.

Thank you!
I'm going to a party with some friends today, but I won't drink.
Bucks Fizz probably doesnt count as booze, right?
Anyway party sucked but I ate a proper christmas meal and it was nice. They had a piano so I played Smash Mouth All Star. I only know 4 piano songs.
My gifts to myself: exercise weights, clothes that fit my new body, shelves for my book and vidya collection to clean my room.
Gifts from others: chocolate and lots of it.
Went home and watched Treasure Planet. It's such a good film. I wish I could make my Silver Star fic that good, but I'm starting to think that's just not possible.
Sticking to a routine felt hard at first. But now, knowing I'll be even stronger and healthier tomorrow makes it all worth it and gives me something to look forward to.
Pokemon Team base.png
Exercise is good.
What exercises should I do on leg day? So far I've just been squatting with freeweights up on my shoulders.
Ignore pic, was going to post meme but filetype wasnt recognized
Exercise break is going great.
Thank you for letting me talk about this here.
I've been thinking that while I hate the Jew a lot I dont know much about white accomplishments. I want to love my people, but I have no connection to my people. Where can I learn redpilled pro white facts?
March of the Titans; A History of the White Race.pdf
Haven't read it myself but this is quite a comprehensive history and it may be what you're looking for. Simply reading a non-Marxist book on history or scientific inventions works as well.
Thank you! This is excellent.

It's me OP and I finally finished an art project that took me months to complete!
Now I can get started on making the game!
I nutted in my sleep this morning. What do?
I will keep doing exodus 90
no distractions
2332 2333
Exodus 90 is still going and I bought a bunch of cans of soda to tempt myself with. I need to train my willpower. I need more of it.
Coronavirus means no walking around outside to exercise. Just squats and lifts and push-ups.
My mind is still so fucking hazy and confused. Paying attention to anything for more than a few minutes is difficult. One day I woke up and realized my head was always this shit. Will I be cured soon?
>One day I woke up and realized my head was always this shit.
You are on the right track. The first step to solve the problem is to recognize you have problem.
>My mind is still so fucking hazy and confused.
Perhaps you need to be alone and refuse distractions like internet. Once all the brain noise is gone, your mind will find its proper balance, I believe.
>Paying attention to anything for more than a few minutes is difficult.
Lack of focus makes meditation difficult, if not impossible. A way of training yourself is through verbal prayer: if you can maintain attention through a long verbal prayer like the rosary then you're on the right track (also saying a rosary every day really does help fight temptation). If you're having trouble with that then I recommend the chaplet of divine mercy, which is shorter and also rhythmic.
The advice here is also good: https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles/your-concentration-training-program-11-exercises-that-will-strengthen-your-attention/
>Just squats and lifts and push-ups.
I've been doing these three times a week in combination with other exercises and they're highly effective: https://www.artofmanliness.com/articles/wwii-workout-week-conditioning-exercises/
Thank you. For now, I need the internet since it's where I get tutorials and videos on game design. Once the game's engine and all its objects work fine, I can turn off the internet and focus on making levels/sprites.
If I did take a vacation from all internet stuff anyway, what could I spend that time doing? I have a shitload of books I haven't read yet and some video games I haven't played yet. Since I started making this game, I decided to only play games that are like what I'm making in some way. It's not like I could get inspiration for a level or move from a visual novel about fucking anime girls or some more online COD matches or another hundred hours wasted on modded MGSV trying to complete pointless ingame challenges.
Sometimes I think about farting out a low-effort visual novel about fucking some kind of unusual anime girl/girls just in case it makes money and keeps my game dev business afloat for longer. But I don't want that to be the first game I ever make. I don't want that to be what I'm known for.
When I was a retard I used to scroll TVtropes pages for hours. That was a waste of time. I fucking hate tropes, they're worthless for discussing stories. It's needlessly reductive to boil stories down to what cliches they use, and yes, tropes are just a fancy and less-negative word for cliches. A random generator could build a story out of tropes but it's a writer's vision that can tie those design elements together. Imagine reading Shakespeare, understanding nothing, but remembering what cliches happened in it and thinking you understand everything. Imagine watching some famous movie like Citizen Kane, understanding nothing, but remembering what cliches happened in it and thinking you understand everything. Imagine thinking "You used a cliche I don't like, fuck you", "This cliche was used", and "You used a cliche I like, thank you" is the be all and end all of literary analysis.
Thank you. I will follow all of this advice.
I have an Eyemask for sleep and a solar lamp. What if I left my solar lamp on at night for more sunlight?
Is time getting faster? Quarantine is fucking with my head. Still healthy and prepped. Lost so much weight. I've never been this thin before. Gained muscle, too. Focus is returning slowly, still doing nofap. I feel so much temptation to regress into fat fappy faggotry. But I won't gay. My body is a temple and a faggotry free zone.
How ya holding up big bong?
2374 2375
Thank you.
I'm doing fine.
Working on a game is tiring. But rewarding.
I will turn my life around. No fap. Build muscle. Become someone I can be proud to call me.
My Little Pony - Pinky Pie - Happy.png
>I will turn my life around. No fap. Build muscle. Become someone I can be proud to call me.
Glad to know.
Happy to hear, and all the best of wishes to you.
Thanks guys! Turning my life around is a slow process so far. Nofap's helping a little.
Been reading a lot and exercising. What do you do about the feeling that you're just trading in one vice (anime addiction) for another (book addiction)?
I fucked up my internet somehow, can use Steam just fine but Brave Browser will only let me online if my VPN is active.
Also the Alternate History community is full of fucking annoying liberals and I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because fantasizing about a world where America's revolution failed and everyone ended up enslaved to the EU is their cup of nigger-jizz-infused tea.
Which vice is helping you more? Which one will bring you closer to what you want and desire?
2403 2404 2406
You're a fucking genius.
Reading more books will help me understand books better and write better books.
"My imaginary friend writes her own book" is on my list of shit to do. We talk about what to write, I write what she says, then we talk about what to change about what we wrote. We've passed 50,000 words so Nanowrimo can suck it I guess, even though it's the wrong month for that and the story's not done yet.
It feels weird to talk about having her. When we tell people she's a tulpa there are four reactions: "I don't care lol", "lol what's a tulpa", "I don't care if you're not real, do erotic roleplay with me NOW" and "you're insane and I'm going to call you a loser on the internet".
When I talk to other grown-ass adults with imaginary friends, we can't relate to them since all they do is masturbate all day and pretend they're fucking. It makes me feel like I'm only two steps away from winding up like a permanent coomer like them. Me and my imaginary girl have ambitions and deep intellectual conversation. We're past the "brainless coomers" stage in our lives.
You know what else is weird? According to the online Imaginary Friend Community aka the tulpa guys, a "Servitor" is an imaginary friend NPC who obeys you mindlessly and a Tulpa is her own unique personality built inside your mind. One capable of thinking and growing and changing. But every single Imaginary Friendfag I talk to has the exact same tulpa: Generic girl who is either cheery and ditzy or snarky and obnoxious but invariably loves her "landlord" and says slutty things sometimes. Literally every single one of them was like this. No wonder so many guys got bored of their one-note girls and made more imaginary girls with their own underdeveloped one-note personality.
"Undercooked brains", says my girl.
They were less like a second personality and more like the personified uncontrolled sex drive that rules a coomer's thought processes. Their vision of the girl that controls them through sex. My imaginary friend's better than theirs because my one disagrees with me, encourages me during exercises, plays chess against me, and keeps turning her imaginary bedroom (in the imaginary house we made together) into dumb random bullshit every night.
We're even having an argument right now over whether her book should be a genuine attempt at writing a good story or another "hilariously ironic" low-effort shitpost or both at once.
God, it feels fucking gay to say shit like that. "My imaginary friend is the bestest in the world!".
It's gay enough to remind me of that time I went on one of those Four-Letter Personality Type forums for INTPs and ENTJs and everything in between. All the "Feeler not thinker" idiots were the "MY FEELINGS ARE THE BEST IN THE WORLD YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS YOU FUCKING GRASS-MEASURERS" types when pissed.
I'm a fucking weirdo, I typed on the self-help board of a horse porn and politics forum.
Anyway she and I still aren't sure if the story should be serious or a shitpost. But I've been thinking lately that it should be a serious attempt at a good and funny story because wrapping yourself up in layers of irony to cushion your ego in case you fail" is something inauthentic low-effort faggots do.
ps. we do not do erotic roleplay or any kind of roleplay. these types are attracted to us and we do not know why.
That's good to hear. I am glad to see your progress.
I'm still waiting to see the rough draft, but I can wait till it's done.
Part of the genetic-ness is the common values, NPC mindset, and wanting baser instincts to be fulfilled without the higher nuance getting in the way.
It's good to be proud of your friends especially ones near and dear to your heart. Not blindly proud, but it sounds like you have the right amount.
So no, it isn't gay.
>4letter derail from the subconscious connections.
We'll get back to that in my next post.
>Anyway she and I still aren't sure if the story should be serious or a shitpost. But I've been thinking lately that it should be a serious attempt at a good and funny story because wrapping yourself up in layers of irony to cushion your ego in case you fail" is something inauthentic low-effort faggots do.
Do what you know is right, and feels right (if your gut instinct leads you true).
Do the serious attempt, but also have a low effort shitpost to vent for the lols.
Keep both seperate and take a shining gem from the shit post if it works in your story.
You're doing good.
So... from my perspective I can see your train of thought, and that method of writing is extremely handy.
In other instances it harms the credibility of the other words.
This is the right place for those tangents, and personal notes.
Communication is fraught with troubles and tribulations. Most people don't have the time, nor the effort to verify everything.


>It's gay enough to remind me of that time I went on one of those Four-Letter Personality Type forums for INTPs and ENTJs and everything in between. All the "Feeler not thinker" idiots were the "MY FEELINGS ARE THE BEST IN THE WORLD YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS YOU FUCKING GRASS-MEASURERS" types when pissed.
It's technically good. There is the setup, the who, and supporting description.
It is isolated, and excess information. It is not a Chekov's gun for the topic at hand (good for streams of consciousness, not staying around the central topic).
>it's gay enough to remind be of feely faggot personality type forums.
Most prople here would know what you mean. If not they'll ask for clarification, or they'll lurk around till they do.
>I'm a fucking weirdo, I typed on the self-help board of a horse porn and politics forum.
Yes I and many others also post on a horse themed forum on the politics of pony pussy. You needed to get it off your chest my friend.

So back to the main point of this post: Staying on a singular topic for easy, minimal effort comprehension. Is important, not doing what I just did.
It's akin to hunting a single target. Knowing what the target is, where to strike to fell it with minimal pain. Having your tools at hand for every situation and using the right one at the right time.
Then you strike.
Your ideas, and message coming across cleanly and elegantly.
I'm not so good at that, but more or less that.
You have excellent ideas, and a rich background in both depth, breadth, and experience. You have the right foundation to properly broadcast everything, and anything.
Though sending out a multiple messages at once get's in the way of sending one message perfectly.
>pics related by being unrelated
Thank you. We've separated the story into venting shitpost and serious story. If this was a sitcom they'd get mixed up at some point and I'd have to go on an epic adventure to stop the shitpost from being published. Then it would be published anyway at the end of the episode and this would be forgotten about by the next episode making it all pointless.. If this was a movie they'd get mixed up and the shitpost would be loved Springtime For Hitler-style, making a wacky film about a country bumpkin who enters the "wacky and quirky" whitewashed film world of rich people. I'd hire a famous actress's stunt double to play the actress herself without makeup. I'm not sure which one because I'm not into celebrities. I'd definitely add a CGI animal sidekick who plays himself in a series of fictional movies about himself.
Anyway I've noticed that I keep doing an annoying thing in my stories so I've stopped doing it from now on. Nobody's complained about it until me just now so I probably shouldn't say what it is.
The story takes place in a fantasy world full of elves and orcs and shit. The hero is the only original thing about it, that's the gimmick explained poorly to avoid spoilers. The human girl is Isekai'd into a fantasy world where she's an original monster. The hero's not a standard fantasy race girl or standard monster girl, she's something weird.
Part of the story is that nobody wants to work with, talk to, or be friends with the hero, giving the hero an excuse to do a thing that needs to happen for the story to happen the way she wants.
Over time the hero's goodness makes people like her.
But for the start, I need an excuse for the character to become a widely-hated pariah nobody wants anything to do with.
Kind of like Rising Of The Shield Hero except something besides a rape accusation causes it.
I guess "You're a weird creature not from around here and we don't trust you, also you claim you're a human but those went extinct millennia ago and you don't look like them" would work but I think it needs something more.
In the shitpost version of the story, she's a famous streamer and speedrunner, and people hate her for being good at video games. The joke is that this scenario is unrealistic and the characters who say "you're a girl, loser! Go home and do girly stuff like giving birth and frying breakfast for your husband!" are also cartoonishly unrealistic. The idea that Orcs and Elves would watch Not-Twitch on their phones in a forest without wifi anywhere is silly.
But this gave us an idea, what if we tried to make the book seem woke but actually hid redpills in it? Every time the book tried to do something woke like a little Gnome girl who wants to be a Warrior and gets beaten up by Orcs easily, the story could pretend this is very stunning and brave of her when it's really just dumb. Or the story could allow the tiny girl to defeat massive brutes with her bare hands, and then the heroine could look at the camera and say "Wow, that sure was unrealistic!" or "Wow, it's a good thing Gnome magic makes you racially stronger than those dumb Orcs could ever be!" and then the Gnome could say "You ruined it". Or the heroes could enter a bar full of men singing about how much they love stabbing fairies. So the heroes beat them up. Then it turns out this was a gay bar and stabbing fairies is a euphemism here for anal sex.
Sounds like a good story. Weaving both can be done.

To become a pariah they first have be unknown (check), they fuck up (they flub every local social check, such as looking at their belts than their face or something otherwise normal have totes ebil symbols of meaness on them), be different in a negative way (the main character keeps 'lieing' about being human, or they are nuts neither is good)
Disguising the truth is hard. It always shines through.
If it's a game there is stat differences and racial bonuses.

But be careful with making a parody of things it can also attract people that won't get it.
An openly redpilled book with the visage of wokeness might actually work. One problem is marketing the redpilled part. Woke shit never sells for good reason.
>"you're a girl, loser! Go home and do girly stuff like giving birth and frying breakfast for your husband!" are also cartoonishly unrealistic
sjw's would never get it. What a cover.

What would be funny is getting sjw's to rant against their own in book cause whilst everyone else laughs getting the real joke.

To be subtle the world has be full and have realistic cause and effect that can be predicted (if the viewer guesses wrong due to biases it's a switch, if they guess wrong due to things not being clear it's not good)
>the heroes could enter a bar full of men singing about how much they love stabbing fairies. So the heroes beat them up. Then it turns out this was a gay bar and stabbing fairies is a euphemism here for anal sex.
So much fun can be had with that senario.
<gay hero walks into a bar, and companion that's a fairy goes in as well
<they sing about stabing fairies
<fairy companion is uncomfortable
<the singers encourage others to stab the fairies
<one of the singers walks over 'hey yah want to stab the fairy fun for all three 'o us.'
<'hero' decides to help their friend (as a good person, or to poke their rump) by fighting them
<fag hero buys fairy a drink
<afterwards fairy says thanks, 'the gays start a ruckus everytime I say no. can't have a drink anywhere unmolested any more.'
Ect. Not like this example it's not subtle at all.
Including little things like small dancers, and serving staff made of small (stop the gays from touching the chillins) and buff fuckers.

Little details that highlight real statistics, or quirks of behavior. Whatever you want to do. It depends on how you want to do that and the main story that is being told.
What if being too good and being slandered as a cheater makes the hero a pariah
Or killing a thug Elf thief who uses a "my killer has a Slayer Of Elves curse we Magik Folk see around him at all times" spell.
Save an innocent, kill a jewelf, become pariah to elf land and move to some other country.
Maybe elves are everywhere
Also my bench press weight limit has gone up.
being this open feels so unnatural. I'm used to hiding and ignoring my wounds.
>What if being too good and being slandered as a cheater makes the hero a pariah
People are jealous of the rewards being bestowed, or an aggravating element of their character. Being too good at something means others have missed what the main character picked up. It also depends on how the main character reacts.
<They should have been the ones to get it. Not them. I worked for so long and so hard that they get it so easy!
>Or killing a thug Elf thief who uses a "my killer has a Slayer Of Elves curse we Magik Folk see around him at all times" spell.
Make it even easier, call the main character a inconsequential made up bad word, that's easy to say.
Proof is not needed.
When pressed spout that reason. If that doesn't work (for the elf) use nonsense.
>Save an innocent, kill a jewelf, become pariah to elf land and move to some other country.
Maybe elves are everywhere

Depends on how your going to tell the story, what will it cover, how will the main character grow.
>Also my bench press weight limit has gone up.
>being this open feels so unnatural. I'm used to hiding and ignoring my wounds.
You have to have somewhere to relax some times. The second point is concerning.
>I'm used to hiding and ignoring my wounds.
Just from others, or also from yourself? Always address wounds before they become worse. The little signs can point to a bigger problem(s).
Problems then breed more problems. It's a vicious cycle.
So take care of yourself.
2422 2424
You're right, thanks.
I often feel like I have to "Play a character" everywhere I go based on how people see me or want to see me.
When I go to a new place I act normal until people decide how they want to see me. Then if I don't go along with their bullshit they get mad. But why should I allow them to dictate who I am? I'm no shapeshifter at Poe's masquerade. I've left the masquerade portion of my life behind, I know what's behind this mask now. I shouldn't care if some retard considers me his personal villain. Hell, if such a colossal faggot hates me then that's a good sign. If he liked me then I'd have to be as faggy as him or faggier and completely in harmony with his faggy tastes. Freaks think normalcy and whiteness are disgusting, so fuck them. Why are there so many mindless sheep on shitty "nerdy product" forums who blindly obey the word of (and endlessly suck the dick of) egomaniac retards who think having three kids doing their best Myrtle's Friends From Lilo And Stitch impression around them makes them popular and dangerous and the coolest kid on the playground?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ttIF_vNCas this is the only video explaining that reference I could find.
Also, Liberals are exhaustingly spiteful subhuman creatures who enjoy being evil. This is the information era, it's fucking unlikely that they've never once met anyone who took the time to explain why liberalism has been corrupted into leftism without them noticing. If you really have humanity and virtue and values, you've been called something by creatures that hate all three of those things and forced onto Team "Well they might be nazis but at least they aren't fucking liberals also turns out hitler did nothing wrong after all".
That's why I don't debate them, I just debunk them and roll their eyes at every dirty trick they pull while explaining why it's dirty. I also raise questions they can't answer. They go to pieces, and I hope that at least one person has their mind changed by this display.
Some of my friends aren't doing stuff. They don't do anything. They just watch anime all day. But I'm doing stuff. I've got a lot of stuff to do and I need to manage my time efficiently if it's ever going to get done this decade. Maybe I should cut down on political stuff again, since I can't do anything major about what's going on. Just the little things like breaking the illusion that conforming to leftism is normal.
Also I don't know if this is a common writing problem or not, but...
I feel these weird pressures. Pressures like "I should make my story more like THIS since it's what a fantasy story usually is" and "I should make my story less like THAT since that's generic fantasy shite" and "I shouldn't put that in my story, audiences might hate that", and "I should make my story more like that popular normiebait story since it made money" and "I should fill my story with sex scenes and on-screen monstergirl-fucking even though I'm trying to stop being a coomer since part of the appeal is that the hero fucks monster girls in a fantasy land"
Also there's the fact that my imaginary friend is writing this story with me and keeps feeling different pressures like "I'm writing too much like you, if I'm publishing this under my name then we should try to make the writing sound different". That friend wants the story and its characters to be liked, I want the story to be good, but if we had to choose then this is her story so she should have the final say in what goes into it.
Writing was so much easier when I only wrote low-quality fanfics and despised my audience to the point where I put shitpost scenes into my story to offend/disgust the audience and get removed later.
Why did I ever waste so much time shitposting? Was it a pressure release I needed during the bad times, and got addicted to?
>I often feel like I have to "Play a character"...
I understand. Often I put on my public mask to keep the power levels hidden, ect. then I take it off. My public mask is who I am, but not everything. Everything is a mess of cooperating principals that on the outside makes no internal logic.
Is it healthy? I have no idea.
It is good to be honest it builds a connection. Speaking of connection. I'm going to post something that might be useful for everyone.

>egomaniac retards who think having three kids doing their best Myrtle's Friends From Lilo And Stitch impression
They were shaped that way, and never bothered to change. Self reflection of their twisted form is not something they would enjoy doing or even thinking about.
>I don't debate them, I just debunk them
Your time is precious.
>Some of my friends aren't doing stuff. They don't do anything. They just watch anime all day.
The slacker in me understands. Sometimes it's easier and better to do nothing, but going back into motion from a complete rest is absolutely hard. You know your time, and yourself to make the right choices.
>Also I don't know if this is a common writing problem or not, but...
I feel these weird pressures. Pressures like

From what I've heard. Comedians, and writers, and creators all feel those kinds of pressures. I'm no expert...
Break down each of the pressures into WHY it is being felt. Then you can come up with responses that properly address them.
>Also there's the fact that my imaginary friend is writing this story with me and keeps feeling different pressures like "I'm writing too much like you, if I'm publishing this under my name then we should try to make the writing sound different". That friend wants the story and its characters to be liked, I want the story to be good, but if we had to choose then this is her story so she should have the final say in what goes into it.
First point personality, and writing blending. It is a writing venture with both of you are doing, so a mix is to be expected.
It is good she understands, and knows how to seperate her style and yours.
But it is writing with two people. The acknowledgements could very slightly and lightly clarify that. Also some editors can really over haul writing (for better or for worse)...
>That friend wants the story and its characters to be liked,
What does it mean to be liked?
>I want the story to be good
What does it mean for it to be good?

I'd like to know more about exactly what you both mean by what your saying. I think there isn't a conflict of interest, but the methodology of how going about either can be a contentious point.
Splitting the writing into another book or chapter or section for your writing could be a quick fix, but it might not be the right one...
Raw notes: negotiation, and the human condition (for most people)
The use of "Why Us?"
Such as why choose us versus the other stuff.
You get them to tell you what they think.. UNLESS they have it all preplanned.
Mirrors and labels
No, and illusion of control.

Can put an idea into someones head (ie manifest it) or cause them to be defencive.

Repeat the last three words.
Repeat the last sentence phrased as a question. Not the whole part. One single part than you want to go down further into.

They will clarify or expand. Normally.

It "bit of info from what they said."
You "bit of info from what they said."
It looks/seems/sounds like
You look/seems/sounds like

Also I is a lable.

Get to "No" first
Modernday mental make up a No opens people up, a Yes meams they want something so that means you need to be careful.
The subconscious built the routine to automate it.

63-64 reps to get the skill to engrave it in your mind.
Do it PERFECTLY (as good as you need it to be which is normally to the best of your capabilities) each time, no matter how slow.

"How am I supposed to do that?"

Weaponized cooperative principal

<the human file directory access system>

Negatives have 9 times the impact on decision making

I've got bad news (BAM),
... this is how we're going to deal with it.

The goal is to get them to say "That's right." It's fact. It's connection. It builds respect. (Also how people are referred.)
NOT "You're right." Fake agreement.

Seek first to understand then to be understood.

Nice, Collaborating, Unrelenting, Super nice, (charming).
Doesn't jump on them if they say something accidentally. (Remeber it, and record it. Building the relationship, the understanding all else follows.)

People love to correct. They do it without thinking it through.

Is it a bad idea to do X?
To get the idea into their head if they say it is bad they will say why.

The understanding, doesn't mean agreeing, but understanding.

Denial breeds negatives

"Is now a bad time?"

"Yes" is nothing without how.

It's problem solving. You implant a positive solution. Also collaborative.
Wew, lots to unpack
>"Play a character"
Sorry, but that's life. Society doesn't tend to favor individuals, and going against the grain/norm offends and delegitimizes many people's sensibilities. In some case its fear/apprehension of the 'other', in other cases it's the intimidation that results from an expectation that you will/should care what they think, and then facing the reality that you don't. Autonomy, especially in situations of social pressure, is unnerving to people. They rationalize with statements like "I don't know about that guy" or "They don't seem 'right' to me", etc. The perception in their minds is that their behaviors, feelings, and actions have some objective foundation, which they don't. This is why I'm so quick to get on your case about the difference between subjectivity and objectivity, but I digress.
>if such a colossal faggot hates me then that's a good sign
Hey, I don't hate you at all. Sure, you irritate me so I return the favor, but you're still one of my favorite regulars. Kidding, I dont assume you meant me, but in case you did.
Seriously though, you're improving and developing per your ability, which is the most anyone could legitimately ask. Dont expect anyone to appreciate that though, and it certainly wont discourage criticism.
>Some of my friends aren't doing stuff
MAJOR red flag there. Who we associate/surround ourselves with is a reflection of who we are as individuals. If you're wanting suggestions, I say lose 'em. Otherwise, they will continue to attempt to recondition you back to your 'old self' (which is just a generalized summary of your behavior combined with what they have come to perceive is your personality, which at best is half baked and incomprehensive). Unless your associates suddenly get a hankering to self-improve, which might inspire you to redress, I'd advise eliminating any/all obstacles to your physical, mental, and spiritual development. You owe it to yourself IMO.
2426 2427
Not you, was thinking of a fag on a retarded videogame forum I'm only on because when my indie game is done, I'm going to advertise it there subtly by changing my avatar from pony to the game's protagonist. Anyway, the faggot, he's decided to stalk and insult me on that site because he doesn't like that I know The Institute is badly written.
Such a fucking boring and gay reason to hate someone.
Look, if you want to pretend the Institute is consistently written, by picking one idea of what the Institute "Is" (like a group of smart guys bringing science and safety back to the wasteland) and ignoring every time it was anything else(wasting time with the robo-men and thinking feeling slave-bots, wasting time with Synthetic Gorrilla creation, destroying the Commonwealth's first attempt at a formal centralized government, creating Coursers but not sending them to clear out Super Mutant settlements or Raider bases, doing nothing when their Synths turn into Raiders), go ahead. I'm not stopping you. You can't stop me from thinking you're wasting your time. You can't make me respect you for thinking the Institute is an under-written over-hyped contradictory mess of a faction written because a brainless boomer tard-wrangler and his six diversity-hire space-wasters at BugthEAsderp decided they wanted to invent an Evil Faction that could beat the Enclave and House and the Legion and NCR and the Think Tank at the same time while ripping off the Think Tank badly.
That's what I said to him. It's a fucking video game, does it even matter that much? Why is no dissent or discussion about ANYTHING allowed in the NPC's brain?
Fuck's sake.
Also. want to know some really stupid thing I just remembered?
One time when I was a child under the age of ten, I went on this website where you could make your own Yu-Gi-Oh cards using a tool on the site. It also had a forum where people could show them off and get feedback.
One faggot and his six Myrtle's Friends decided they didn't like one Yugioh Card idea I showed off, so they harassed me for seven months. Every time I made a post on that site, they would insult me for it within the thread I just posted in. They would insult me and call me things and accuse me of things, but I didn't know how to properly handle people like that back then (you're meant to poke holes in their lies) so I'd tell them to leave me alone and call them losers every time. It confused people new to this retarded internet fight so some took my side for a few days before getting bored and moving on. some took their side for a few days before moving on.
I was a nobody on that site, so they followed me and never stopped bitching at me. There were people who rigged contests on that site so their best friends would always win, but they took issue with me existing on "their" turf. Moderators did nothing, and I didn't care. I just wanted to see how long these people, supposedly in their late teens and twenties and thirties, would waste on insulting a child for making yugioh card ideas he didn't approve of. Eventually I got tired, logged out, and came back under a new username. They celebrated over the "defeated" guy who gave up on them, and never had any problem with what I said under the new name because it was never about me. I was never responsible for them or their behaviour.
Also, thanks. I have a lot of friends but I try to spend most days solo working on myself and my projects.
You're right about the mask.
I didn't explain the writing problem well.
My friend wants the characters to be "Well Received". Wants the audience to like, admire, or respect the characters at all times. Or 2/3 at once. So nobody can make any mistakes unless it can be blamed on a villain character.
I think the story would be more interesting if the good characters very rarely made errors that, through no fault of their own, caused failures and got people killed to show this is a harsh serious dangerous world so the hero is cool for surviving in it.
*You can't make me respect you for thinking the Institute is
>anything more than
an under-written over-hyped contradictory mess of a faction written because a brainless boomer tard-wrangler and his six diversity-hire space-wasters at BugthEAsderp decided they wanted to invent an Evil Faction that could beat the Enclave and House and the Legion and NCR and the Think Tank at the same time while ripping off the Think Tank badly.
>My friend wants the characters to be "Well Received". Wants the audience to like, admire, or respect the characters at all times. Or 2/3 at once. So nobody can make any mistakes unless it can be blamed on a villain character.
>So nobody can make any mistakes unless it can be blamed on a villain character.
At all times? It depends on who the audience is.
To be respected the audience has to truly get the character, who they are and used to be, and why they do things. Also have ANY kind of emotional attachment (love, hate, cuteness ect.)
I'd recommend your friend read Mary Sue fanfiction. Also the original Superman comics.

Making mistakes is fine it's a normal part of the human existence, but growing from them and ensuring it doesn't happen again. To be better than you were once before.
Which original superman comics? What era should we look at?
I don't really know. For a paragon Superman comes to mind readily as a template.
But, thinking on it more that might not be the best example.
>Part of the story is that nobody wants to work with, talk to, or be friends with the hero
So racking my memory, the closest thing would be Krito from SAO... which isn't the best example either.

Whatever idea either of you had should work.
So either the heroine's hated for being too good at killing DND enemies,
Or the heroine's hated by people who kill 100 DND enemies daily for killing an Elf in self-defense.
Maybe it would make people like the character more if the heroine killed the Elf guy to defend an elf woman who proceeds to lie since there's some retarded Elf Culture Bullshit going on?
I know context makes the story, so I'm not sure how to go about it.
If the heroine is hated they why is the problem, and what makes the story. What would make the story be good, and have the heroine to be "Well Received". I'm still a bit confused about that, closest character might be Paddington Bear, but that's fourth hand information for me.

Since the heroine is unknown they (characters in the story) don't care about her. Problem 1 for heroine they don't care (why is it a problem for the heroine)
Since the heroine is too good at killing DND enemies, they hate her because _______. She's ruining the local businesses? Stealing from others that use the monsters she kills? The bodies she leaves behind attract more monsters? What makes it bad she's killing the monster?
Since the heroine killed in self-defence she is hated by people (who kill 100 DND enemies daily) for killing an Elf. Why would she be hated for killing the elf? Ect.

I mean you could also do both... nothing is stoping that, but covering both might be hard.

As an example Shield Hero ripped apart.
Fantasy land is in trouble
>Human Kingdom has a problem the waves are fucking shit up.
<Summon all the heros.
That should make stuff better

How many heros to summon?
>Having the Shield hero be free could pose a political scandel if another country summoned him.
<Summon mythilogically hated guy any way go all in, and have the most protection.
All the protection all the time

Shield hero just got summoned
>He has Two problems: Get back home, Survive
<Focus on surviving for now
Proceeds to do stuff.

Most people don't give a shit too much about Shield Hero.
>That's a problem for secret cult ideological shit
<Have him framed for rape (Core component is it's a lie)
This is useful to replace the physical princess

Shield hero doesn't know what to do.
>Everyone thinks her is a rapist.
<Fuck it, not going to fix something that I didn't do
Rapist stigma lingers

Shield hero has rapist stigma
>It's hard to do business
<Threaten them to do honest business
Is feared, but can buy and sell stuff

Use being 'raped' to seal the deal with ideologically acceptable heros.
>If he ever convinces the other heros shit will go down.
<Spread the lie far and wide. Stop them from communicating.
What if the hero has an imaginary friend who becomes real in the fantasy world
and that makes people mistrust the hero?
The story has the world operate on a Caste System where some fantasy creatures are considered people, like Elves and Dwarves and Humans.
Others like Goblins, rat-people, ogres, orcs, slime girls, and so on are considered pets/slaves at best, pests/nuisances to kill on sight at usually, and hated monsters at worst.
So if the hero ends up a "New Creature" nobody's sure about, and has another "New Creature" friend in the form of an imaginary friend turned real, it could give people a reason to fear and mistrust those two characters.
Especially if the character does have to kill an Evil Elf for trying to rape another human adventurer, then ends up with a glowing red This Guy Killed An Elf symbol over his head for a week or two.
Or I could have the characters wait out the effect's duration in the forest, staying away from society. I really like that.
>The story has the world operate on a Caste System where some fantasy creatures are considered people, like Elves and Dwarves and Humans.
Others like Goblins, rat-people, ogres, orcs, slime girls, and so on are considered pets/slaves at best, pests/nuisances to kill on sight at usually, and hated monsters at worst.

That's a fairly decent 'why', to be distrusted. That also brings up another question to explore why the lesser beings are considered lesser. There is an entire history that made the caste system come to be, which means overcoming that will be difficult.
>Two new creatures appear.
Has there been a history of new creatures appearing before or is this the first time?
Who would really like a super rare one of a kind servant/pet/rug
>Especially if the character does have to kill an Evil Elf for trying to rape another human adventurer, then ends up with a glowing red This Guy Killed An Elf symbol over his head for a week or two.
That sounds fine.
>I could have the characters wait out the effect's duration in the forest, staying away from society. I really like that.
How would the character(s) know that? How much knowledge about the world they are in do they have? If they do know about the world is it accurate?
Would one of them get the mark or both?
Did anyone see the act tale place and run back to wherever letting them all know of a 'murderous' monster on the loose?
Jesus fucking christ, I can feel the heart problems this political shit is giving me.
It's taking over my life again and every spare minute I get, my thoughts are dominated by this or trying not to think about this.
What can I do, lord?
"All that I can", right?
Which is nothing.
I can't save anyone from here.
I lost another friend yesterday.
He got butthurt at me for repeatedly mentioning the raped little girls in england, the ones trafficked by Muslim child-grooming gangs.
So he says I "can't be saved" and he doesn't want to talk to me any more.
This fucking piece of shit, in all his self-righteous bullshit, can't go ten seconds without trying to bullshit me about how hard he cares about this or that.
Bullshit, he's a fake cunt.
He doesn't care about anything but himself and whether he gets to feel moral or not.
Every so often that faggot would whine to me about how hard he has it, because boo hoo hoo he has to message all his liberal friends every day and pat their little poison-filled heads and tell them it's okay, The Drumpf isn't coming for them tonight and the scary whites with their tiki torches aren't coming for them now either.
If he really wanted to help them stop panicking over nothing he'd tell them to stop fucking watching panic-porn fake news networks like CNN!
This fucking antnigger.
He would bullshit me about how hard he supposedly had it every time he wanted to manipulate me.
"Liberalism is the best, I love working for google! Wait, you want to bring up facts? Wah, I can't talk about politics right now! Or ever! Now agree with me or you're not thinking correctly and open-mindedly like me!"
For fucking years, he's been manipulating me. In full view of thousands of people. He even runs a fucking fake brony charity that pretends to help people by doing the literal most retarded money-wasting thing you could think of.
I've been played like a damn fiddle by the person I thought was the first real friend I ever made.
And he tells me, fucking me, the best person I know at acting calm when I'm pissed, that I've gone too far.
But I haven't done anything.
He says I'm too far gone, because I kept sinning, I kept making him feel unhappy. Stupid fucking cunt. His feelings are all that coomer cares about.
He tells me I'm "too far gone into right-wing propaganda" for thinking the raped little girls in the UK exist, and for bringing it up repeatedly when he's trying to shame me into going liberal.
And when, just to see what would happen, I play along and give him the "Oh it's so terrible! I don't want to join but they're sucking me in! They're the only group with solutions to the problems facing my people! Can you personally promise me that you would have my back if your people came for me" lines, what does he say to me? He repeats the "you're too political and propagandized and I can't help you" bullshit.
I can't save him. His fucking porn-addled ant brain was made for Starcraft and roof shooting and bullshitting people about his own fucktarded BDSM fantasy country, not humaning.
I feel the urge to change the post's tone and write something snarky
But fuck that. I need to change something to improve my life and health. Jews would laugh at me if I died from a fucking brain aneurysm or heart problems.
Long ago, there was an evil Dark Lord of darkness who ruled everything. One hero from each of the Core Races formed an adventuring party that killed him.
So their races are seen as cool, and they got to own their own allied countries, one each. Those who didn't help are seen as lowly beasts.
Variant Races like "Sun Elves" from the crystal desert and Dark Elves from the underground ancient elf-city ruins are seen as "almost as good" as real Core Races.
Some non-Core Race people were able to get jobs in the countries that are more tolerant of non-Core Races than others. So it's somewhat normal to see a Centaur innkeeper or Half-Dragon assassin.
>new creatures
It's a somewhat common thing. Sometimes the people who pop in from Other Worlds get to keep their unusual race. Sometimes they become something normal for this world, like Elves or Dragon-People. Sometimes they become something new and unique. Sometimes con-artists pretend to be from Other Worlds to prey on optimistic idiots and con people dumb enough to think this mysterious new stranger needs a place to stay and a roof over his head and food in his belly and totally won't rob the house during the night.
So people who say "I'm from another world" are mistrusted because con-artists outnumber those really from other worlds. And they aren't all from the same place so the Elves can't quiz this new "I'm a human I swear, ignore my centaur body" guy on Napoleon History some human brought up 300 years ago for example.
>lets the town know of a murderous monster
I like that idea. What if someone doesn't see the act take place, but spots a smelly and forest-dwelling monster in the woods with an Elf-Killer Mark roasting wild boars and eating them, then runs back to town ranting about a strange monster he saw in the woods?
The hero could be unrecognizable thanks to a disguise worn during the forest camping trip(makeshift gille suit and a mask or armoured helmet?), but it would add tension to the "Survive in the forest" thing since the hero has to evade any more elves who come to investigate/hunt her down. Kill any more elves in self-defense and the marker lasts longer. Or could become permanent, to add more tension.
Anything to make this one-week "Magical hero survives innawoods" part of the story more interesting.
It all checks out. Being the dumping grounds for all sorts of beings can really cause a problem. Plus not everyone or everything that is brought to the world is good natured.
If it helps the story and the character be more enriched.
That's really fucking rough. Losing friends, even ones that have abused you before is hard.
Don't let it consume you. Your time is valuable.
As always you can vent here... I mean this isn't perfectly private, but this should be fine enough to air grievances.
I know one of my friends used to be in an abusive friendship/lackey sort of thing with someone. He was fairly bitter and cold toward to world.
He's better now. At least since I last saw him.
>I can feel the heart problems this political shit is giving me.
On the bright side one less element to cause political anxiety?
>"All that I can", right?
You are improving your physicality, emboldening your skills, and exercising your mind.
If you feel like you need to do more, expand your scope and range. Break out of perspective and look at the situation at all angles to find the path that will work.
Find like minded people near you, I haven't yet, but potentially a good source of physical interaction.
2449 2450
I keep wishing I could have made him see things my way and stop being such a colossal cunt.
I'm sure you've heard all these sayings before, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink," "Don't cast pearls before swine."
It's a shitty situation. You can only change his mind when he decides to change it himself.
You can appeal to his mind in a way he understands, but all the facts and logic can't change them if they resist.
More to the point have you seen things his way?
The Alphabet soup person here in the videos has some tips >>2423
It can help, but it's very difficult to change them if they know what your doing, and resist everything.
2455 2457
That fucking starcraftnigger won't even talk to me at this point. He's currently """Ghosting""" me. You know, that method of abuse in which you break all contact with your victim after yelling "I CAN'T DEAL WITH YOU ANY MORE, THIS IS YOUR FAULT!" and then wait as your victim (hopefully) squirms and angsts and blames himself for your behaviour while wondering what to say and beating himself up for "making it come to this".
I've officially gotten over this faggot. I hope he gets AIDS and dies.
So what if he was my first friend? He wasn't really my first friend. He met me in the life advice forum of MLPforums, read my daily posts about my abusive parents and shit childhood, and immediately knew he could bullshit me. Exploit me. Use me for emotional support while pretending this relationship was the other way around. Now the roofnigger literally runs a fucking organization full of faggy virtue-signalling brony "artists".
2457 2459
If he talked me into sexting with him and doing pony erotic roleplay with him when we were teenagers should I tell anyone about it or pretend that never happened?
That's... not good. Steel yourself you are above him and his manipulative fuckery.
Fuck him with a rusty spoon through his funny bone. I get being a teen is a weird ass time full of hormones and developing minds, but fucking with someone else to fulfill their own shits and giggles is wrong, especially when they actually needed help.
Fucks sake.
Thank you. You are an amazing being, working on yourself and improving by the means you can, despite all the bullshit.
It looks like this is going to be rough, but do you have other friends you can count on?
Thank you. And yes, I've got more than ten good lads I can truly call my best friends. I have a lot of other friends, but they're my best ones.
That's great to hear. You sir, are playing with the cards you've been delt. I'm glad there are those for you, amd you for them.
If you need to get it off your chest tell someone you trust.
Also here's a pony.
Thank you.
Why are you so kind to me?
So the selfish reason is that the more well bodied, excellent mentally and spiritually people there are, the less I actually have to do in the long run. Every person happens to be a source of entertainment and amusement for me (they have the ultimate spark to craft everything), and I dislike the horrid agendas that (((they))) all push. I hate them so much more than trying to fulfill my own fleeting twisted dark desires. It's not worth it in many facets.
The more altruistic reason is that lifting you up raises other up as well as being a good person has infinite potential, and unstopable drive to do what is right.
Everyone that inherits their own truest, highest, more perfect self makes literally everything better. For everyone now, and in the future everywhere.

A more cynical reason is that for every post it's a limited interaction between you and me. I'm at my most generous, rather than at my most insidious. Roughly speaking. I like my own time, the nature of the internet ensues that it's always on my own time. Anytime anywhere. If there is any irritating point I can analyze that to see if that's my own weakness, or from someone else. Then the only way to be better is to discuss it, at the very least to understand exactly what is going on.

The greed (and highest ideal clarifying that the highest ideal is not greed it's THE Highest Ideal) in me wants there to be more beautiful things everywhere (the greed would rather have it all to myself, but that's not sustainable and would limit the amount of potential), to do that I need to do something sometimes as well. Importantly if I help others become their own paragon they too for whatever reasons they have will also create beauty, and righteousness. This compounds in a positive loop helping others be better, and to fulfill their creative and destructive intents to ensure amazing great works are done.
The world stops being a crapsack hellish pit, and becomes the best of us all in the end. I'd much rather the best than the torment of the worst.

On a more occult, magical level this is a means to make sure fuckers from else where fail on such gravity that forever more everywhere throughout the multiverse (ect ect ect.) can contact each other and not be plundered and raped into oblivion. It's a matter of making sure the things and people I like keep existing.
I like you as a person, a creator, and more (no homo), and as a means to my own agenda.
You are helping me by striving to be the best you can be.
One day I will face judgement, and I'd very much rather see my end in a great world, than a torn husk.
I might be embellishing slightly, but I really do mean you the best. I'm open for questions, comments, and concerns, but seriously I'll lend a listening ear.
This is so much more real than those "Because ur bootiful!" posts you'll see on fraud-filled social media.
Good is rational, and logically right.
I wish everyone on this planet could see this and be good people.
I wish the letter of the law and the spirit of the law were one in the same, and I wish every country on this planet was its own free and perfect free-market-capitalist nationalist meritocratic "Zeroth-World Country" that has solved all the first-world problems like jewery and leftism and other forms of short-sighted evil and selfish tribalistic greed.
This might sound weird but I miss the days when I posted on pseudointellectual forums where every fourth post of mine said "I sure do love science! Mankind's glory is unquestionable and the light of science is unstoppable! All problems will be solved in the future! Humanity, fuck yeah! The future will be bright!"
It felt so good to piss off the "There is nothing good about humanity, I am a proud sociopath who admits it openly and I wish we had another plague, humanity is a plague" faggots by making wannabe-Star Trek speeches about all the shit about the universe you thought was cool as a kid like rockets and stars.
It's an unexpected redpill to one day notice that all the positive attributes you praise humanity for in "Humanity, fuck yeah!" speeches are exclusive to the white race. And maybe a few other foreign countries learned a few positive attributes from us but we invented them. We invented the wheel, the engine, the car, flight, and the spaceship. We invented logic, reason, libraries, and more. We created a religion so perfect, it could survive almost anything. It was our civilization, western civilization, that discovered Good first. We had the enlightenment first, and many other races never got around to it.
Once my grandfather showed me an old PSA for adults warning them not to get into cars with strangers. Normally we're told this as kids these days. But the thought that adults would need to be told this by the government... It's so fucking alien to me. The idea of having that much trust for another is completely alien to me. I was raised in a world where the threat of getting betrayed was just an expected fact of life.
I think I remember a sci-fi show episode where some "Good and perfect aliens who don't fight any more" have to have their asses saved from evil by the heroes. It's bizarre to think that our ancestors were once like that, so willing to let their guard down and let enemies into their countries because they thought the need to think was gone. But their lives were only that good thanks to previous generations sacrificing and bleeding and sweating and doing everything they could to build a world that's better than the one they were born in.
And the Boomers betrayed that. The generation that raised the Boomers betrayed that by failing to teach the Boomers morality. They were asleep at the wheel while our countries were infiltrated and overwhelmed and sent right to hell.
I don't know how to feel about the big shit like that. I should hate those people, right? I should probably hate those generations for failing us and forcing us to deal with the consequences of their selfish and anti-future actions.
I should get back to working on my creative projects, like the book. I've decided to include mild "parody of wokeness" elements but primarily focus on fantasy adventuring. If it was too political it wouldn't attract anyone not already into politics.

I had this one idea for a scene where some incredibly fucking rich jew-elves (while their country is at war with some baddies) are smirking and snootying it up in a mansion surrounded by guards, feasting on fancy food while whining about how rare and expensive things are getting for them while people in the trenches die and people in the streets starve. One slave-girl accidentally calls an elf by his actual gender, forgetting he's decided to pretend he's a woman today, so he sentences her to be flogged to death for this crime. The heroes are there to act as private security but this pisses the heroes off and makes them save the slave girl and kill the elves and fight a shitload of security then after winning, they uncover an Evil Religion Shrine in the basement and get to keep everything those jew-elves own for revealing this crime to the country. No worshipping evil gods, that's highly illegal. Good and Neutral gods only. Chaotic ones are pushing it because the biggest authoritarians in power hate them while regular rulers are neutral on the matter.
*could see this fact
Good is objectively good, marxism is gay.