All praise be to Football and John Elway!
I think that Denver Broncos are going to be footballs for all time. You know how many quarterbacks the Denver Broncos are going to have? Well I'll tell you: ALL OF THEM. They are going to have so many footballs they are going to have to open new football rooms in space just to hold all the footballs and also they will have free parking for the quarterbacks.
If I were the Denver Broncos I would do nothing except rub chili sauce all over my butthole and think about how much football I am. God bless American.
>>135580>>135576Hi, I'm John Elway and it's really nice to meet a fan. Back when I was 11 years old I killed a bear with my fist and stole its power, and made that power into football.
The Lord Jesus Christ blessed me with a solid gold cock which gave me the power to rule Equestria, and I brought football to the land and all the ponies rejoiced, for they now had all the footballs just like me, John Elway. And so it shall be, forever.
Amen. Praise Football.
>>135576This is a nice pony. Reminds me of the story of the flood from Genesis.
In the days of yore there was no football, and no Denver, and no Broncos. There was however John Elway, for John Elway is eternal. And God said unto John Elway, thou shalt build me an ark, only it won't be an ark so much as it will be football.
And John Elway did build football 40 cubits wide and 40 cubits deep with a circumference of 40 million cubits and a football. The football was pleasing to the God and the American, and he said unto Moses: You should be more like John Elway you raging faggot.
And Moses said unto the Lord: Fuck you I'm a Patriots fan.
And God did smite Moses for his faggotry and there was much rejoice and football was had for all. And John Elway did make more football and put football on the moon and put all the footballs in space which made the world for the third time that day.
Amen.
HI ANON!
Wanna play football?
>>135589u nigger u beat me to it
looks like you're john elway now.
>>135573>>135573Praise American. Praise Football.
>>135591All who have Football in their heart are Denver Broncos, and so are John Elway.
>>135595Yea, this is true, for in the city of Bethlehem, over 400 thousand million years ago, there was born unto the city of Denver a savior, who is John Elway, the Emperor of Football.
And the mighty Elway did raise his fists of football, and did rain down football upon the people of Sodom and Gomorrah, who shall henceforth be known as the Oakland Raiders and the Seattle Seahawks. And the ponies did rejoice, for there was Football.
Praise American. Praise Football.
This thread is full if friendly people. And Football.
You want to know who my friends are? I have four of them. Their names are: John Elway, John Elway, John Elway and, last but not least, John Elway.
When the Four Elways converge and form like Voltron, they become the Denver Broncos. it is at this point that none of you puny faggots are safe. John Elway forms the Head of the Denver Broncos, and John Elway is the strong, muscular chest. John Elway and John Elway make up the arms, arms like tree trunks I tell you, and John Elway and John Elway are the legs, twelve stories tall if they were a foot. Last but not least is John Elway, and he is the mightiest of all: The giant cock of the Denver Broncos is he, and he stretches five miles around the entirety of the equator and back again like five or six times, give or take a few hundred thousand feet.
All the ponies knew that one day The Denver Broncos would come to liberate them. For years they had labored in bondage under the torment of the Oakland Raiders. For years they suffered the indignity of not being football. But then one day all that changed, when John Elway and the rest of the Denver Broncos, John Elway, John Elway, John Elway, John Elway, John Elway, John Elway, John Elway, John Elway, John Elway, and John Elway, came to Ponyville and became the Denver Broncos. Then, there was football.
Football, now and forever.
t. Denver Broncos
I for one, support the church of Elway that is the Broncos' stadium
Why the fuck do you post with the moderator tag?
>>135573I dont like the denver Broncos.
>>135676Do not question the glorious best mod John Elway
>>135680Let me tell you why that's bullshit:
JOHN ELWAY.
You see, John Elway wasn't always football. There was a time when John Elway was only 29, maybe 33% football. However when the Lord Jesus Christ called him on the phone and said John Elway you need to be 100% football, do you know what he did? Do you think he just laid down and sucked his thumb and cried the way you probably would you pussy? No, fuck no. John Elway took the fucking call and answered.
John Elway was always the man to become football. John Elway was sired by Dan Reeves, born of Rainbow Dash, conceived in fire, Master of Football, Lord of the Denver Broncos now and Forever.
In the Name of Jesus Christ and God Bless American.
What does John Elway think of Tim Tebow after all these years?
>>142241In the year 1872, when Moor-occupied Denver first declared its independence from Colorado, and the Colorado Rockies built a new stadium and proclaimed it Moors Field, there was much pestilence and disturbance in the land. Lo, and the ponies did cry out for Football, and Football came to them in the form of Tim Tebow. And Tim Tebow did kneel upon the Field of Football, and the tender young fillies gathered around him, and he did utter a prayer unto His Majesty John Elway, and it went like this:
Our Father, who art in Denver, Football be thy name. Thy Football come, thy Football be done. Give us this day our daily Football, and forgive us our Basketball, as we forgive those who Baseball against us. Lead us not into Flag Football, but deliver us from Soccer, for thine is the Football, and the Football, and the Football forever. Amen.And thus it was that the pants rent asunder with a loud braaaaap, and there was much flatulence, and the skies did part, and a holy ray of Nacho Cheese Flavored Football™ did burst forth, and the ponies did rejoice, for there was much Football. And tortilla chips were produced, and all would enjoy Football. Except for the Moors, for they were most niggerish in their ways and bowed only to the false Football that is Basketball, and Baseball, and other foul things. And thus Tim Tebow did raise his mighty arm aloft, and did thence proclaim the city of Denver to once more be restored unto Football.
I hope this has answered your question to your satisfaction. Praise Football. Praise American.
>>142271But where did football come from?
>>142304Its not where did Football come from, because Football has always been and shall always be. Everything comes from Football. Everything in space is a Football. Oh, they call it an ellipse, to avoid copyright infringement and royalties settlements, but they're Footballs. The molecules of all existence are themselves Footballs, stacked together in a perfect formation because since they are Footballs they are also Denver Broncos, who always operate in perfect formation. This formation has been given to them by John Elway, who also has been and always will be, but can sometimes be seen to not be if he feels like having a sandwich or something.
Praise Football
>>142313What created the football?
>>142315John Elway did. He needed something for his Denver Broncos to do because otherwise they spent all day stretching and doing running drills, but had no sport for which to play. In addition he decided that there should be Footballs and that everything should be more Football. Unfortunately there was also the Oakland Raiders, because Football is good and all that is must be good so it must be Football, but there must also be that which is Football and thus good but is also in opposition to the Denver Broncos which is not good. With this in mind John Elway took Aryanne and gave her some of his Football, which resulted in the Big Bang, which sent Footballs throughout the cosmos, to form into everything that is its self a Football.
>>142323No one really knows who created John Elway. It could be that John Elway created himself because without him there could be no Football, and not just Football but American. This did not please John Elway, and so he created himself that there could be Football and American. Peyton Manning was the first to propose this theory, and upon doing so his head exploded upward in a giant pillar of forehead that ruined his Football career. The moral of the story is it is best not to question John Elway, lest we get giant foreheads.
Praise Football
>>142325Opinion on hockey? It tends to be not niggerish.
Opinion on the XFL?
Football as a sport is on the way out.
What is this meme about Denver Broncos? Don't you dare tell me to lurk MOAR because regarding it I have just been watching and watching and I just don't get the joke.
(USER WAS EXPELLED FROM THE HOLY CITY OF DENVER FOR THIS POST)
>>142390>jokedefinitely doesn't get it yet. Lurk moar
>>142390Pardon me for heresy, I don't really get it either.
I assume it's just because it has to do with horses.
You can see >>1 as the starting point.
>>135573I'm ready for my punishment, divine god John Elway.
(BEHEAD THOSE WHO INSULT THE DENVER BRONCOS) >>142407>Needing this explained to youOur precious board /sp/ stands for sports, but simultaneously does not stand for sports. The Broncos are ponies personified in sports and are therefore the mascot of everything good.
Do you understand, maggot?
>>142418That's basically what I thought. I just wasn't 100% sure, thought that /mlpol/ might just be more deep/meta than that.
I'm a little disappointed, to be honest.
John Elway pls. What does John Elway think of hockey? The XFL?
The Colts? :^)
>>142420I can understand your disappointment. Some time ago I found myself wondering if there wasn't some greater meaning behind John Elway and the Denver Broncos. I wondered, is it really just shitposting, or is there Football to it?
But you know what goes great with philosophy and intellectual yearning? The Denver Broncos.
Some people think that the Denver Broncos are a Mary Sue for everything. After all, what
doesn't go good with the Denver Broncos? Nothing, that's what. Even a bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios layered in motor oil goes great with the Denver Broncos. "Why? Fukking motor oil?" you might ask, and are quite right to do so. But I'll tell you what, a bowl of cereal with motor oil is a hell of a lot better WITH the Denver Broncos than without. The Denver Broncos are like special items in a video game, except its no game, its Football. And any time you are more Football the game is that much better. So keep doing those pushups and one day you too might be a Denver Bronco, who brings light and joy to everyone and everything, simply because you're de facto about 1/44th John Elway, which is always good.
>>142461Hockey is the bastard spawn of bowling and frisbee golf. Thousands of years ago it sprang forth from the primordial ooze that would later form Canada, and crawled its foul and bestial self into the depths of the earth, where it would wait for two hundred million years. At this point it realized it had waited too long so it traveled back in time to the year 2000, so that it could invent the time machine and travel into the future to give the time machine to itself and thence travel into the past, far into the past, to when John Elway was a lad of twelve.
John Elway was only a lad of twelve, but he had already killed like 15 bears, and Davey Crockett was impressed and promised to go off into the woods to train and to become more football. He later died at the Alamo due to pursuing a path of false football, and that path was the XFL, an unholy alliance between /x/ and the state of Florida, who had recently become infested with a plague of giant bees. The bees are still there to this day. I hope this has answered your questions. Praise Football. Praise American.
pls forgive the lateness of my reply