/vx/ - Videogames and Paranormal

>>5323
Me just wanted to play fooseball!

>>5325
Casts Righteous Might, an area of effect spell that effects the party.
>>5320
Well played, this bard/mage thing may work out well

>>5327
>knows the conditions for playing
>plays anyway
Pussy. You don't play murder ball, unless you're prepared to face the consequences.

Infernius takes a hit to his shoulder, while Thez (?) takes one in the leg. IDK about Infernius, but she's mad.
"YA DONE FUCKED UP THIS TIME!"

>>5328
Yay
I'll get a playlist put together for this by tomorrows play time

>>5332
Oh please do, that was great
Its Trump's move, but again anyone can declare

Trumpaladin casts TRAVEL BAN, which pauses the ants long enough for him to figure out what the hell is going on

[1d20 = 6]
>>5333
Noice trips
I roll to levitate, 1 is nothing 20 is roof level

>>5334
what do?

>>5336
Success, you're about 7' off the ground.

>>5337
Trump shouts out to all parties, "why the hell is a game of football turning violent. This is real, American football. Not soccer. Wars are not supposed to be fought over this"

Glares at Tracy, because he doesn't know why the hell there is fighting, but she seems to have started it

>>5340
Essentially Trump is directing this at the ants, trying to engage them diplomatically

Its Infernius' move

>>5341
this is better then my plan
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/Gravehorde_(3.5e_Spell)

>>5339
And how tall are the ants again?
I decide to wait for Trump to finish

>>5344
The drones are about 4', the warriors are about 6'.

>>5341
The ants who hear stare incomprehensibly. What is foosball without the loser losing their head? Otherwise is blasphemy.

>>5346
"So you want to play football then?" He raises his ball. "When and where?"

>>5336
"He-hay! Look at this!"
*produces soccer ball made out of the skin on copper's ass from bag*
"I thought I'd bring your queen a gift. It's like a foosball, but life-sized! Whjy don't we all go and give it to her?"
>>5340
>football
Foosball is table-soccer. It's a demonic practice.
>>5347
Stop doing shit, you fucking bull!
Delet this. Learn to diplomacy!

[1d20 = 18]
>>5345
Great, barely above the heads.
Roll for detection
I want to scan the room

>>5349
>>5342
fine i hold my move untill shit goes sideways.

The Potato shouts, amidst the crisis "HEWOES! THEWE APPEAWS A GWAVE MISUNDERSTAINDING! We apologize for not infowming eawliew, but the losew of the game is fowfeit. Why would anyone want to keep awound a faulty specimen?"

>>5352
So we can't leave until someone dies?

>>5351
Noted, you now have veto-move (meaning you can interject at any time)

Trumpaladin delivers a death glare at the soccer ball, and unsheathes Vanderiem, now paying no attention to the ants

>>5353
ALMOST in response to your inquiry, Thez rips through a few more ants.
"Oi, this isn't a game anymore!" she says, decapitating another and gutting (in a manner, they have exoskeletons so its more like a caving in) another's abdomen.

>>5352
"It's rigged. It's always rigged.." she says under her breath
How did they appreciate my soccer ball? I was saving it for ritualistic purposes, but I hope it'll stop the blood orgy.
>>5355
Come and get it!

>>5355
"Ahh, naw ye're talkin lad! Let's gets to separating the wheat from the chaff!"
>>5357
Psst, it won't

>>5356
*sighs*
How many are in the room before I waste a spell

>>5358
>I unveiled my secret weapon for no reason
Awww... I was hoping to at least give it to the queen...

>>5359
Minus the existing casualties, II'd say about 40, though they're mostly drones.

[1d20 = 12]
>>5361
Fine
Roll for a cone of cold to freeze these fuckers

>>5360
there'll be plenty more
Tracy has first move, I'm assuming murder?

Trumpaladin serves upon Tracy a form I-862 - a Notice to Appear before an immigration court. Because such blasphemy must be physically removed

>>5364
TOP
FUCKING
KEK

>>5364
Wew, you threw me off with that one,... I'm almost willing to allow it to be a spell like effect for the degree of confusion I currently experience

>>5364
>Appears visibly hurt
"B-b-b-but I'm so good at it...! And I was born in Texas..."

[18d20 = 175]
Okay, Tracy loses her move aaaaand the ants are attacking.

gawd these ants suck
Torcuil takes a grazing swipe while Tracy takes a slash across the face (oh yes, deal w/ it Xp).

Tracy's up

>>5370
*hold up soccer ball in front of face to blok slash*

>>5369
>grazing swipe
b-but WHY

>>5368
infernuis whisper Kek. towards the ants.

"Sorry guys... We could've been friends..."
*Takes out spray can and shakes it*

How far are we from the exit?

>>5371
too late, atk has already landed
You can revise your move if you like.
>>5372
You're asking "why?" in the middle of a fight? Forfeit!
>>5373
And with a resounding "Kek" (though whispered,... which kinda fits when you think about it) waves of ants are not only bowled over, but obliterated. Even the Potato (who I had planned as being a recurring character) is obliterated by the utterance of Kek. The room is now clear except for heaps of ant-goo, a foosball table, and the door leading toward the entrance and "further".

>>5367
Trumpaladin removes still more legal forms from his pack, and addresses the ants. "I charge you all as EXCLUDABLE, and accordingly, REMOVABLE, for having entered the Pyramid and this land without inspection by an immigration officer at an approved point of entry, pursuant to INA 212a"

>>5375
thez bring back potato.

>>5376
(the ants in the room are in pieces, revise your statement)

>>5375
No no no, why did I swipe when I casted
Also I guess cancel last spell

>>5375
*light soccer ball on fire and kick it into the advancing crowd of ants*

>>5378
Trump addresses Tracy, "all detainees alleging a defense on the grounds of birthright citizenship have the obligation to produce documents to verify their claim"

>>5377
>>5380
The ants (in the room) r dead. There's no (immediate) threat. I'll assume you didn't do that, cuz you wouldn't needlessly. (or would you?)

>>5381
"I, I, I... I've got a recently-made piece published by my creator, who is a confirmed Texas resident and citizen."

[1d20 = 10]
>>5383
Are there more ants coming?
roll for detection

[1d20 = 11]
>>5384
meant for >>5382

>>5383
"Sorry Tracy, but for children born out of wedlock after 1986, you must have, in addition to the father's acknowledgement of the child as his own, an agreement in writing to for the father support the child until she is 18"

>>5377
"Why should I? Its not like,... oh fine."
She says as she wraps her body in gauze.
"I'm keeping track though," she says as she produces a random-looking stick from her 'back pocket' (non-lewd, its the quiver).
She pokes the potato, and as his body reconstitutes her body splays signs of damage equal to the Potato's (which are extensive, given the spell).
She slumps down, unable to stand effectively, while the Potato awakes with a start.

>>5384
Not immediately, but give it a second

>>5386
>18
We're talking pony years, right?

>>5389
"Somehow I doubt there is court precedent on the subject"

>>5387
Wha

>>5390
"It held up at the marriage licensing office..."

"GASP" says(?) the Potato, while Thez starts gurgling, unable to speak.
"Whatevew happened? I don't know whewe I am! Who awe you people? This isn't my home? I DON'T KNOW WHEWE I AM!" the Potato starts screaming.
"Yghhhhwlelegiiggll," Thez attempts to say.

"I.. I think we should go..!"
*pony ears detect more ants coming*
"Unless any of you idiots have a plan?"

>>5394
Success, there ARE more ants coming, from both sides.
"Ehrweggemend chshsirrlin deill fmruurrdesd," Thez states

>>5393
Uhhh
>kicks potato across the room
>>5394
WHAT ABOUT THEZ

>>5396
no hurt potato

[1d20 = 11]
>>5393
calm down me friend

>>5393
thez you ok?

[1d20 = 8]
Trumpaladin gauges to see whether the new ants coming in are trying to attack or not

>>5396
Thez is more of a lump of flesh then a bipedal organism at this point. I suppose you could describe her as a overly slumped over pile of flesh, but I digress.
"Bdddhch chmurbbbbel kat usssa bieishdee plumr," she almost seems to shrug, except at the moment she lacks motor control.

>>5395
*herbivore ears detect predators on both sides, causing uncontrollable agitation*
"..Ah fuck..!"
>>5402
>Notices perfect opportunity to cut-off tail

She's still quite alive, but don't expect anything particularly dexterous from her at the moment. She's getting better though, she just started moving her leg.

>>5404
Please confirm, you're doing this? You can, unobstructed.

>>5406
*stealth*
*quickly takes tail, and stuffs it in bag, without Thez noticing*

[2d20 = 8]
>>5402
I levitate thez to keep her safe while casting a magic missile to kill ants

>>5407
There is no "without Thez noticing". Its her tail ffs. But, since you done did it,...
Thez's (or rather, the pile of flesh that is weirdly still animate and yet is still Thez) eyes glaze over. The pile becomes still.
At the same time, scores of larger ants pour into both sides of the room, armed with pikes and spears levelled at the party.
The potato screams to the ants "I had nothing to do with it!! This is entwely outside my intentions inand around the hive! PWEASE!" he screams at the incoming ants.

>>5408
You can do one or the other. Me, I'd go with the magic missile.
An advancing ant falls dead

>>5409
me protect you potato!
>ready an attack.

>>5409
>that's going to come back to haunt me
Use "flamethrower" on advancing ants to 'kill it with fire'.

Trump? Tracy? Infernius? Torcuil? Waiting on you (unless you want the ants to have their way with you)

>>5410
I'll do that
What would I have to roll to kill an ant with the potato

>>5413
Trump smites the ants with Vanderiem

[1d20 = 17]
>>5413
I was still using my makeshift flame thrower.

[1d20 = 5]
>>5411
Infernius adopts a stance to protect the Potato (gallant, you may get extra exp in paladin).
>>5412
You have no idea, but the flame-thrower works fine. The ants are not stupid and quickly scramble out of range, but you do buy yourself some time.
>>5415
^_^

[1d20 = 9]
With an exquisite swing,... Trump misses,...

[1d20 = 16]
And then cleaves an ant in twain.

[1d20 = 16]
And then another.

[1d20 = 17]
And then ANOTHER
(Its not a flood, I swear)

[1d20 = 12]
>>5416
I didn't ask you
I roll to throw the potato ass shit bag at an ant

[2d20 = 11]
*focus ears for detection*
How many more ants?
*stabs at nearest ant*

[1d20 = 14]
Still more ants fall to Vandereim under Trump's mighty swings (mighty cleaving is a most effective skill)

[2d20 = 23]
>>5424
Dammit!

[1d20 = 2]
Trump is on a roll. Every roll that is over 10 equals another kill and another strike

>>5425
Can I attack on auto too?

>>5427
Ahh, too bad. After felling (what is it, 5?) ants, Trump comes to rest.

>>5429
Normally no, that's a feat based on Vandereim (imagine a giant chisel, that when swing just kinda goes through things, thats what Vandereim is)

[1d20 = 12]
>>5428
OH FUCK YOU
Why do you care about the tuber?

>>5428
That's a level 5 spell, you're level 2.

>>5432
he seem like good person.

The area IS more clear now, and Thez is almost speaking in detectable syllables.
"UUuu mfummm plllllusks!"

>>5428
The potato has retreated into the ants, but you can still cast cryostasis if you like (or decide another move)

>>5425
>>5421
>>5420
>>5422
Not having yet liberated enough ants from their corporeal bondage, Trump takes another swing of his mighty Vanderiem the latter plays "Scotland the Brave"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSH0eRKq1lE

>>5436
How do levels work in this game? I thought we were all level 2?

[1d20 = 5]
Continues to slash next biggest ant

[1d20 = 13]
>>5442
Fuck!

>>5438
Damn acidental post
Can I finally get my shit agknowledged for once?
Roll for magic missile
>>5439
Man, And I almost learned to play thaton bagpipes
at least I can play on my ukulele

[1d20 = 18]
takes another slash

[1d20 = 18]
>>5436
i cast mass blindness on the ants.

[1d20 = 3]
>>5444
And I fucked up my die roll

[1d20 = 7]
>>5447
kek

*combine slashes with fire, to burn ants after wounding them (using both hooves and maw)*

[1d20 = 10]
>>5448
Awww
keeps slashing

[1d20 = 13]
Can I set any of these ants on fire?
>shouts to others
"So, what's the plan? Are we gonna just stand here and keep this charade going until we drop, or do we leave with Thez and Bubbles??

[1d20 = 2]
GM?!
*continues assault*

>>5451
Fuck me!

[1d20 = 9]
>>5450
"What happened to Thez and who is bubbles?"

Slashes!

>>5453
"Thez currently looks like some kind pile of slowly-regenerating hamburger: spell backfired or something. Bubbles is the weirdo who led us in: looks like the ants were controlling him!"
*moves towards Thez to start dragging her*

[1d20 = 6]
>>5454
>>5453
trump have plan?

K.
>>5441
Everyone is currently lvl 12
>>5444
Another ant falls dead (there's still like 12 tho)
>>5446
Success! The ants are blinded!
Okay from this point, the room is cleared again (due to ant blindness and murder).
Sorry 4 delay.
Room is TECHNICALLY non-hostile, but don't bet on it.

>>5455
"Knock that retard (Bubbles) out before he hurts himself!
Retreat?!"

Thez is starting to almost pick herself upright "Brr curfuk whet oo whesh furrr" she says, slowly bringing herself afoot.

[1d20 = 19]
>>5456
do i see potato?

[1d20 = 19]
>>5454
"Thez can take it, and I think we knew bubbles was of the ants to begin with."

>>5455
"I would have prefered not to fight, but it looks like our only real option now is to kill every single ant. I don't know if that can be practically done here. I would say kill the queen, but we simple have no idea where the queen is. In the mean time, so long as we can hold them off, we may as well proceed towards the Treasury"

Slashes

>>5460
"Whatever you say, Flashy!"
>Triple wields
>Prepares for battle

[1d20 = 8]
>>5461
*slashes nearest ant*

[1d20 = 17]
>>5463
>tfw I'm being punished for making a soccer ball
*slashes again*

[1d20 = 20]
slashes ants

[1d20 = 7]
>>5464
again

[1d20 = 3]
>>5466
>reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
again

[1d20 = 13]
>>5460
Another slash!

[1d20 = 16]
>>5468
Another!

[1d20 = 17]
>>5467
>fml
slash, combined with fire, for residual damages

[1d20 = 16]
>>5469
Another!

"Everyone, proceed downward along this path, it goes to the treasury"

[1d20 = 14]
>>5471
Another!

I can keep slashing if it's higher then a 10 right?

[1d20 = 18]
>>5472
Another!

[1d20 = 4]
>>5470
Use fire to open path towards treasury can I get any intimidation boosts from my Bandit quirks?

[1d20 = 19]
more

>>5474
nope...

[1d20 = 1]
>>5473
Another!

>>5477
And... I fall over
"Cover me!"

[1d20 = 5]
>>5478
covers trump

>>5478
*Covers*
Wards off ants with fire-enhanced intimidation

[1d20 = 9]
>>5480
roll

The room remains clear, in spite of a regular input of ants. Trump, with those rolls does an excellent job of keeping the room 'stable', and Vandereim is laughing maniacally and streaming curses.
"Ahhhh! Ye silly twig-bugs haven't felt the likes of ME now HAVE ye!?"
Torcuil unleashes a blast of flame that covers the entrance, as Thez slowly regains her feet.
"Good show. Unfortunately, there's probably almost no end to them."

[1d20 = 8]
>>5482
"We don't need to kill all of the ants, we just need to make it to the Pyramid's Treasury."
Trump pulls out his map of the pyramid. Roll to lead the team on the proper direction

Tracy slices through ant after ant. The drones stop coming from the rear, but there are still soldiers coming from the rear.
Thez "Omms" and seems to regain some fortitude (now that she can actually do anything) while Trump stands as vanguard at the door.

[1d20 = 15]
>>5482
"/bug/s never know when to give up! They're almost all tenacious die-hards; and the ones that aren't are massive fruitcakes."
*Stabs ant in the thorax vagina*

[1d20 = 5]
infernuis stabs ants with his zweihander and makes ant kebab.

[1d20 = 10]
"Alright, proceed onwards!"
Trump goes to a passage way and enters, slashing at ants

>>5483
Trump correctly determines the route to the treasury and begins to lead the way. Thez falls in along-side to (still weakly, but serviceably) assist and support (they're giving each-other flanking, allowing the one not being attacked to take an attack of opportunity against the one attacking,... a most effective strategy) to slowly make their way inward.

[1d20 = 2]
Trump slashes at ants while continuing to walk forward at steady pace
How is Thez attacking?

Infernius, with a resounding cry of "For Rockwell!" begins his assault, beginning with that 20 a few minutes ago, decimating further ants and helping claim another doorway (there's no doors here, but for simplicity's sake).
The party stands at the entrance to a large chamber, indistinguishable lights glittering in the distance.

>>5489
How?
How indeed, didn't someone take her tail? I had forgotten about that. Technically this whole thing should have gone far more sour than it did. I'll think on how to rectify that, but for the moment there are more pressing matters. Luckily, taking her tail does not prevent her from being effective,... rather it,... well you'll see.

[1d20 = 19]
>>5490
Trump soldiers forth, casting OFFENSE upon the entire group

[1d20 = 4]
infernuis heal party when we get wounded. can i help thez with reform faster with healing?

[1d20 = 1]
push forward, blasting flames to stun ants before slashing

>>5494
FUCK!!!

[1d20 = 12]
Trumpaladin slashes!

Tracy lights her mane on fire

[1d20 = 13]
>>5497
I think that means another slash

[1d20 = 16]
>>5498
And another

[1d20 = 17]
>>5499
Another

[1d20 = 12]
>>5500
He can't keep on winning

[1d20 = 20]
>>5501
He wins

[1d20 = 9]
>>5502
UNSTUMPABLE

[1d20 = 1]
infernuis jump and cut one in half.

>>5503
Stumped

Douse self with slime from severed head.
*push through the ants with pony-rogue maneuverability and see what's on the other side of the hallway*

[1d20 = 4]
roll

>>5492
>everyone goes (without the hair) super-saiyan
Before the party stands the Queen in an expansive chamber lined with,... the same crystalline structure as the pyramid. In fact, it almost looks like a lower section of the Pyramid (cuz it is).

[1d20 = 5]
>>5508
ANNND I can't do that..
*slash ant in front of me*

>>5509
queen their has been misunderstanding.

>>5509
How big is she?

>>5509
Trump levels Vanderium at the Queen
"Alright everyone, looks like we found ourselves the Queen. Tracy and inferius, hold off these drones, while I attack!"
>>5511
"Diplomacy has been attempted and failed. The only misunderstanding was the belief we could negotiate with these insects."

>>5511
"Impudent fool, what dare have you to even SPEAK to me!" She commands. And with it, a wave of weakness whooshes upon the party, negating the Offense.

[1d20 = 12]
>>5514
"DIE INFERNAL BEAST!"
Trump charges at her with Vanderiem to deliver a slashing blow

>>5512
About 18' tall, and about 30' long.
Also, she's squatted in the middle of a ridiculous pile of opulence. Piles of gold and gems litter the room, atop one pile of which is a very large and heavily bound book. Atop another pile is a glittering scroll, which Thez is immediately transfixed by.
"It... it is! I had... I thought,...." she begins to stammer.

[1d20 = 19]
>>5516
*offers soccer ball*

[1d20 = 9]
"TRACY, GET THE BOOK AND THE SCROLL, AND WE CAN RUN THE HELL OUT OF HERE!"
Slashes at the queen again

>>5515
Noted, but there's a distance you must close first unfortunately she casts a spell, and an almost impreceivable sphere appears around her.

>>5519
Trump ignores the queen then, and goes straight towards the book

[3d8 = 18]
>>5517
She fires a lightning bolt at you, just cuz why would she want a soccer ball?

>>5520
The book is well within her protective magic sphere

[1d20 = 16]
>>5521
>it has magic
*block shot with soccer ball, causing it to explode*
*dive for the scroll (do I have a maneuverability/theft boost for my class)*

Thez is now going apeshit. Not at the queen or any perceived threat, but at the sphere around the scroll. She clearly has little else on her mind.

[1d20 = 2]
>>5522
Beat the sphere then, with mighty Vanderiem!

[1d20 = 20]
>>5514
infernuis taze queen
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/Tazer_Beam_(3.5e_Spell)