/vx/ - Videogames and Paranormal

>>5323
Me just wanted to play fooseball!

>>5325
Casts Righteous Might, an area of effect spell that effects the party.
>>5320
Well played, this bard/mage thing may work out well

>>5327
>knows the conditions for playing
>plays anyway
Pussy. You don't play murder ball, unless you're prepared to face the consequences.

Infernius takes a hit to his shoulder, while Thez (?) takes one in the leg. IDK about Infernius, but she's mad.
"YA DONE FUCKED UP THIS TIME!"

>>5328
Yay
I'll get a playlist put together for this by tomorrows play time

>>5332
Oh please do, that was great
Its Trump's move, but again anyone can declare

Trumpaladin casts TRAVEL BAN, which pauses the ants long enough for him to figure out what the hell is going on

[1d20 = 6]
>>5333
Noice trips
I roll to levitate, 1 is nothing 20 is roof level

>>5334
what do?

>>5336
Success, you're about 7' off the ground.

>>5337
Trump shouts out to all parties, "why the hell is a game of football turning violent. This is real, American football. Not soccer. Wars are not supposed to be fought over this"

Glares at Tracy, because he doesn't know why the hell there is fighting, but she seems to have started it

>>5340
Essentially Trump is directing this at the ants, trying to engage them diplomatically

Its Infernius' move

>>5341
this is better then my plan
https://dnd-wiki.org/wiki/Gravehorde_(3.5e_Spell)

>>5339
And how tall are the ants again?
I decide to wait for Trump to finish

>>5344
The drones are about 4', the warriors are about 6'.

>>5341
The ants who hear stare incomprehensibly. What is foosball without the loser losing their head? Otherwise is blasphemy.

>>5346
"So you want to play football then?" He raises his ball. "When and where?"

>>5336
"He-hay! Look at this!"
*produces soccer ball made out of the skin on copper's ass from bag*
"I thought I'd bring your queen a gift. It's like a foosball, but life-sized! Whjy don't we all go and give it to her?"
>>5340
>football
Foosball is table-soccer. It's a demonic practice.
>>5347
Stop doing shit, you fucking bull!
Delet this. Learn to diplomacy!

[1d20 = 18]
>>5345
Great, barely above the heads.
Roll for detection
I want to scan the room

>>5349
>>5342
fine i hold my move untill shit goes sideways.

The Potato shouts, amidst the crisis "HEWOES! THEWE APPEAWS A GWAVE MISUNDERSTAINDING! We apologize for not infowming eawliew, but the losew of the game is fowfeit. Why would anyone want to keep awound a faulty specimen?"

>>5352
So we can't leave until someone dies?

>>5351
Noted, you now have veto-move (meaning you can interject at any time)

Trumpaladin delivers a death glare at the soccer ball, and unsheathes Vanderiem, now paying no attention to the ants

>>5353
ALMOST in response to your inquiry, Thez rips through a few more ants.
"Oi, this isn't a game anymore!" she says, decapitating another and gutting (in a manner, they have exoskeletons so its more like a caving in) another's abdomen.

>>5352
"It's rigged. It's always rigged.." she says under her breath
How did they appreciate my soccer ball? I was saving it for ritualistic purposes, but I hope it'll stop the blood orgy.
>>5355
Come and get it!

>>5355
"Ahh, naw ye're talkin lad! Let's gets to separating the wheat from the chaff!"
>>5357
Psst, it won't

>>5356
*sighs*
How many are in the room before I waste a spell

>>5358
>I unveiled my secret weapon for no reason
Awww... I was hoping to at least give it to the queen...

>>5359
Minus the existing casualties, II'd say about 40, though they're mostly drones.

[1d20 = 12]
>>5361
Fine
Roll for a cone of cold to freeze these fuckers

>>5360
there'll be plenty more
Tracy has first move, I'm assuming murder?

Trumpaladin serves upon Tracy a form I-862 - a Notice to Appear before an immigration court. Because such blasphemy must be physically removed

>>5364
TOP
FUCKING
KEK

>>5364
Wew, you threw me off with that one,... I'm almost willing to allow it to be a spell like effect for the degree of confusion I currently experience

>>5364
>Appears visibly hurt
"B-b-b-but I'm so good at it...! And I was born in Texas..."

[18d20 = 175]
Okay, Tracy loses her move aaaaand the ants are attacking.

gawd these ants suck
Torcuil takes a grazing swipe while Tracy takes a slash across the face (oh yes, deal w/ it Xp).

Tracy's up

>>5370
*hold up soccer ball in front of face to blok slash*

>>5369
>grazing swipe
b-but WHY

>>5368
infernuis whisper Kek. towards the ants.

"Sorry guys... We could've been friends..."
*Takes out spray can and shakes it*

How far are we from the exit?

>>5371
too late, atk has already landed
You can revise your move if you like.
>>5372
You're asking "why?" in the middle of a fight? Forfeit!
>>5373
And with a resounding "Kek" (though whispered,... which kinda fits when you think about it) waves of ants are not only bowled over, but obliterated. Even the Potato (who I had planned as being a recurring character) is obliterated by the utterance of Kek. The room is now clear except for heaps of ant-goo, a foosball table, and the door leading toward the entrance and "further".

>>5367
Trumpaladin removes still more legal forms from his pack, and addresses the ants. "I charge you all as EXCLUDABLE, and accordingly, REMOVABLE, for having entered the Pyramid and this land without inspection by an immigration officer at an approved point of entry, pursuant to INA 212a"

>>5375
thez bring back potato.

>>5376
(the ants in the room are in pieces, revise your statement)

>>5375
No no no, why did I swipe when I casted
Also I guess cancel last spell

>>5375
*light soccer ball on fire and kick it into the advancing crowd of ants*

>>5378
Trump addresses Tracy, "all detainees alleging a defense on the grounds of birthright citizenship have the obligation to produce documents to verify their claim"

>>5377
>>5380
The ants (in the room) r dead. There's no (immediate) threat. I'll assume you didn't do that, cuz you wouldn't needlessly. (or would you?)

>>5381
"I, I, I... I've got a recently-made piece published by my creator, who is a confirmed Texas resident and citizen."

[1d20 = 10]
>>5383
Are there more ants coming?
roll for detection

[1d20 = 11]
>>5384
meant for >>5382

>>5383
"Sorry Tracy, but for children born out of wedlock after 1986, you must have, in addition to the father's acknowledgement of the child as his own, an agreement in writing to for the father support the child until she is 18"

>>5377
"Why should I? Its not like,... oh fine."
She says as she wraps her body in gauze.
"I'm keeping track though," she says as she produces a random-looking stick from her 'back pocket' (non-lewd, its the quiver).
She pokes the potato, and as his body reconstitutes her body splays signs of damage equal to the Potato's (which are extensive, given the spell).
She slumps down, unable to stand effectively, while the Potato awakes with a start.

>>5384
Not immediately, but give it a second

>>5386
>18
We're talking pony years, right?

>>5389
"Somehow I doubt there is court precedent on the subject"

>>5387
Wha

>>5390
"It held up at the marriage licensing office..."

"GASP" says(?) the Potato, while Thez starts gurgling, unable to speak.
"Whatevew happened? I don't know whewe I am! Who awe you people? This isn't my home? I DON'T KNOW WHEWE I AM!" the Potato starts screaming.
"Yghhhhwlelegiiggll," Thez attempts to say.

"I.. I think we should go..!"
*pony ears detect more ants coming*
"Unless any of you idiots have a plan?"

>>5394
Success, there ARE more ants coming, from both sides.
"Ehrweggemend chshsirrlin deill fmruurrdesd," Thez states

>>5393
Uhhh
>kicks potato across the room
>>5394
WHAT ABOUT THEZ

>>5396
no hurt potato

[1d20 = 11]
>>5393
calm down me friend

>>5393
thez you ok?

[1d20 = 8]
Trumpaladin gauges to see whether the new ants coming in are trying to attack or not

>>5396
Thez is more of a lump of flesh then a bipedal organism at this point. I suppose you could describe her as a overly slumped over pile of flesh, but I digress.
"Bdddhch chmurbbbbel kat usssa bieishdee plumr," she almost seems to shrug, except at the moment she lacks motor control.

>>5395
*herbivore ears detect predators on both sides, causing uncontrollable agitation*
"..Ah fuck..!"
>>5402
>Notices perfect opportunity to cut-off tail

She's still quite alive, but don't expect anything particularly dexterous from her at the moment. She's getting better though, she just started moving her leg.

>>5404
Please confirm, you're doing this? You can, unobstructed.

>>5406
*stealth*
*quickly takes tail, and stuffs it in bag, without Thez noticing*

[2d20 = 8]
>>5402
I levitate thez to keep her safe while casting a magic missile to kill ants

>>5407
There is no "without Thez noticing". Its her tail ffs. But, since you done did it,...
Thez's (or rather, the pile of flesh that is weirdly still animate and yet is still Thez) eyes glaze over. The pile becomes still.
At the same time, scores of larger ants pour into both sides of the room, armed with pikes and spears levelled at the party.
The potato screams to the ants "I had nothing to do with it!! This is entwely outside my intentions inand around the hive! PWEASE!" he screams at the incoming ants.

>>5408
You can do one or the other. Me, I'd go with the magic missile.
An advancing ant falls dead

>>5409
me protect you potato!
>ready an attack.

>>5409
>that's going to come back to haunt me
Use "flamethrower" on advancing ants to 'kill it with fire'.

Trump? Tracy? Infernius? Torcuil? Waiting on you (unless you want the ants to have their way with you)

>>5410
I'll do that
What would I have to roll to kill an ant with the potato

>>5413
Trump smites the ants with Vanderiem

[1d20 = 17]
>>5413
I was still using my makeshift flame thrower.

[1d20 = 5]
>>5411
Infernius adopts a stance to protect the Potato (gallant, you may get extra exp in paladin).
>>5412
You have no idea, but the flame-thrower works fine. The ants are not stupid and quickly scramble out of range, but you do buy yourself some time.
>>5415
^_^

[1d20 = 9]
With an exquisite swing,... Trump misses,...

[1d20 = 16]
And then cleaves an ant in twain.

[1d20 = 16]
And then another.

[1d20 = 17]
And then ANOTHER
(Its not a flood, I swear)

[1d20 = 12]
>>5416
I didn't ask you
I roll to throw the potato ass shit bag at an ant

[2d20 = 11]
*focus ears for detection*
How many more ants?
*stabs at nearest ant*

[1d20 = 14]
Still more ants fall to Vandereim under Trump's mighty swings (mighty cleaving is a most effective skill)

[2d20 = 23]
>>5424
Dammit!