For those new/unfamiliar, this particular Game is based on Dungeons and Dragons 3.5ed core rules with more references and add-ons than you can shake the random stick at, and further additions are available upon request.
New players are ALWAYS welcome, but please don't be a faggot (lit or fig).
Can I get a quick rundown on the positions of the characters, to start this off?
Trumpaladin is technically in the bar in Port Barry with Inferius (and Thez?), but he's ready to assume his former position standing at the entrance of the ant hive
Are the rat-folk still active there?
As I understand, Infernius and Trump were engaged in a discussion at the bar of the Sticky Wicket, while Thez was passed out on the floor. Tracy is somewhere at the not-pyramid along with Torcuil, but only because I wanted everyone here for the visit to the Ants. Lenos is also about the base, chugging from a tankard about the size of him, as usual.
I think they are all dead/statues of gold now. The pirates seem to have disappeared as well when the rats were defeated
I guess it's time for Trumpaladin to return, since he was only in Port Barry waiting for Tourcil to enter the ant colony
The pirates stopped showing up cuz they didn't care to get jewed. The townspeople have acquired and resourced one of the statues in order to purchase building supplies for a church/temple in the party's honor, and Infernius has all-but sanctified it in the name of Rockwell.
A second of the statues is now situated near the front door of the Base, and the last still remains upstairs in the Sticky Wicket (them things r heavy!).
Alright, guess I won't leave then...
Also, what base are you using for the character-class abilities?
Uhm,... you mean like spells and such?
Spells, attacks, class abilities and quirks.
Up until this point I haven't done anything but stab.
>>4918>No Elway Cathedral
This grievous injustice must be rectified!
Oh please, there's a shrine to Elway IN the base! Besides, the sanctifying is just an excuse for Infernius to develop his clerical abilities.>>4921
You can't do much more with daggers THAN stab. Spells so far have been per player input (either a 'on the spot' spell effect or one that most closely resembles what the player indicates). Abilities are pretty straight-forward die rolls (depending on class, Trump won't be sneaking anywhere for example), and I'll come back to quirks.
I have admittedly been using a simplified format for attributes, proficiencies, and feats thus far, but I plan on fleshing that aspect out in the next session as we play. There will be plenty of opportunity, as I now have a much better understanding of each character's personality and predilections. As for quirks, that's largely player-initiated. Tracy is obviously batshit, as is Thez (different, but similar), Torcuil is dignified and squishy, Trump is (except with the Jews) upright and honorable, and Infernius is big, strong, and speaks not so good (not unintelligent though).
Moreover, this world does not know Football, so it would be odd for there to be an Elway Cathedral. You'll have the chance to build one though, don't doubt.
Also, can I upgrade those saddle scaps I stole into permanent saddlebags?
Sanctus Spirtis Fhurer, rockwellium ominus meme'em!>inb4 the football hooligans take my church.
>>4927>finally has place to hold shit other than knives
Great. Now I can actually make some use of the thief quirks.
*Leave pyramid and scout around the path between Port Barry and the Pryramid*
Here's a perfect example. He didn't SAY 'cast hallow', but thats how I interpreted it.
You're already headed off into left field? Bags take time to make you know, though the equipment is there.
>>4930>thats what i meant
[1d20 = 17]>>4929
Can I get a clear image of the area surrounding the pyramid?
roll for increased detection
>>4923>In the base>Not in the town>>4924>This world does not know of Football
THIS. MUST. BE. RECTIFIED!!!!
Aside from the anthill, there's nothing to say. The place had been sealed off and uninhabited (except by really old zombies) for lit centuries. Its overgrown to the point that anything that might have been there is buried. You know, like the building is.
>>4934>Trump slowly begins to grasp why whatever entity or deity put him here did so.
Now technically, Holy Word and or the Word of Chaos are well beyond either Trump's or Infernius' ability, but I DGAF. Please note though, the strength of either spell is determined by your character's level, and you can only use it once.
Is holy word what is required for mass conversions?
Now then, starting with Tracy.
You get 3 atks/round on a full attack, and you save at +4/+8/+4 (fortitude, reflex, and will). Your backstab does an additional 6d6 points of damage. You're also immune to flanking, have a hightened sense for traps, and I'm pretty much assuming you're 'really skilled' at stealth, intimidate, spot, survival, and open locks. You're also fairly skilled at crafting items, searching, and escape artist. Any objections?
If by that you mean smiting enemies, then yes.
I have no fucking clue what the Word of Chaos is BTW, so I leave that up to you (make it fitting though).
[1d20 = 13]
*continue down path towards Port Barry*>>4940
Looks like the full package I wanted.>>4942Crikit
Next is Infernius, who probably knows what I'm about to post.
You get 2 atks/round on a full attack and save at +8/+4/+8. Also you can turn undead. You get bunches of spells, and you can be as descript or indescript as you like, but the book shows 6, 5, 5, 4, 4, 3 (spell level respective). I'm basing "Rockwell" off of Kord, if you're familiar. Also, I'm eliminating the "pray for spells" thing, cuz thats homo. Ur god likes you, and will grant u spells.
Dubs confirm, how did I not see it?
I'm smacking you with a hat repeatedly
WOULD YOU COOL YOUR JETS FOR ONE SECOND?
K, Trump then.
You get 3 atks/round, save at +8/+4/+4, can turn undead at -2 your level. In addition you radiate an aura of good, you can lay on hands (give footballs), are immune to fear/disease, and can cast 3 spells/day in addition to Football (such as defense, offense, etc.).
Lastly Torcuil. You specified your character as a Wizard, and not a Sorceror. While I agree your aesthetics are Wizard, you role-play like a sorceror. Wizards get more spells, sorcerors get more spells/day. I'm assuming you'd want the latter so unless you veto,....
You get 2 atks/round, save at +4/+4/+8, and get 6, 6, 6, 6, 6, 4 spells/day respective to spell level.
K. I did that as much for you as for me. Its a bitch having to re-reference shit on the fly.
Now then, Tracy you are welcome to explore. The area between the wall (perimeter around the pyramid) and Port Barry is mostly clear hills strewn with rocks and occasional shrubbery (ni) and by day you can see all manner of woodland creature (mostly small).
Continue down path, this time going right (in stealth)
Is it still night time.
No, dawn has broken, and it will take you some time to reach there by stealth (light and all). In the distance you can see another sort of civilization nestled between the forest leading to the grove and another smaller patch of forest.
Meanwhile, Thez awakes with a start shouting, "Chincillas!" before realizing her surroundings, and her pounding headache.
Another side note which I'd like players to consider is "RP items", which mean items which can/will never be used for combat purposes, but can/will be used for storyline or character development. An example would be "A simple trinket the character finds dear" or whatever; can be magic or non-magic. As long as is not used in combat, its probably okay.
A more specific example being that Thez (who lacks the ability to scribe scrolls or do anything productive with) has a self-inking pen for doodling on ppls' faces.
What's available in the crafting room?
Anything except forging at this time (between the Library/Alchemy station and the Workshop).
Even archanist materials?
*returns to pyramid*
Can you be more specific (probably)?
>tfw there's a twinge of embarrassment as the Games threads again rape the front-page
Can I make weapons on fire?
Meaning, embue existing weapons with fire? Yes,... except you (as a rogue) lack the necessary skills to do so. There ARE characters in your purview who can though.
Want me to change that?
>>4963I was hoping to gradually assimilate ghost-rider quirks, as an allusion to Tracy Cage and the Never-Ending Ride
yea im familiar with him, i think it its well.
TBH, yes. I have reached out on several occasions with my concern that when the game is 'on' that there is almost literally nothing more to see on the home than what is going on in this thread. I am both pleased and disconcerted, as I feel seeing a flood of game-stuff might detract from newer users and/or present an inaccurate depiction of what Mlpol "is" to new blood. Desu, I would prefer that it remain on the overboard, but not rape on the homepage. That's just my personal opinion, I really don't know what is 'best', but I wouldn't want increasingly new participants to get a false impression about what goes on on Mlpol colored by shenanigens and such in thread. I yield, but I also know I'm right. Xp
Sorry for that, thanks to the glorious bastard(s), and last I left Tracy was inquiring about setting her weapons on fire. ^_^
*Upgrade stolen mask to have skull pattern on it and increase edge stat*
Stolen mask; did I miss something? You have plenty of hide to craft, thats no issue, but I'm confused by the 'stolen' and the 'increase edge stat' (unless you mean "I cut myself on your edge" edge).
I looted his corpse to take his mask and kunai knives, remember?
"Edge stat" is just a joke.
I may not have adequately depicted that, but it was basic tape/wrapping. Nothing fancy or particular. You can't make that into a skull mask, but you CAN make one out of the hide you have. (I'll just assume you did).
I want to wear the wrapings as a hijab or some shit around my neck, to remind him that he's still my bitch.
How about a fore-arm wrap, with a blade sequestered?
>>4977>for lack of a better term
I meant to have it dangle on my neck, but foreleg is just as good: it'll make a good cozy for MY kunai knives.
U can do that too, I'm just offering suggestions. Still, forearm is more easily accessed than neck desu. Also, no hijabs.
can infernuis have turban?
Sure. All you have to do is explain how to wrap a turban around minotaur horns.
nah fuck that gay shit.
(or a swank die roll)
how are the town folk reacting to the church?
The reception is mixed, depending on impact. The farmers are not so impressed, as they were not terribly impacted by (((them))). The commercial interests however are most impressed, both by the REMoval, and by the result. To wit, a significant minority seems pleased/impressed and appreciative. Even if not denominationally consistent, there is a recognition that the presence of a shrine has overall benefitted the town's inhabitants.
It's 10:00. Are we going to go into the ant nest tonight, if not, I'll do other things.
I'm contemplating a "Default NPC screen" where player can immediately get NPC reception to ideas or innovations. Also:>>4990
o_O I don't know how to respond in a non-adversarial manner. I was rdy to do the ants hours ago.
>>4990I'd go but i'm not at the dais
[1d20 = 6]
*goes into coridoor where rooms are, and inspects doorways *without passing through*
roll to detect traps on first doorway
You explode. Apparently, the traps have been placed on the corridor as well. You detect traps on all the rooms.
Do we need Tourcil?
[1d20 = 15]>>4993
B-but I was just looking...
Ok... no grenades for me...
Lenos is a bit of a shit. I'm playing him per request.
infernuis run through traps?
[1d20 = 7]
Turn around and leave pyramid, go down the right path in stealth
Was that a gets, or was that a deliberate intention?
There is no 'maybe' rape.
Offscreen, ambiguous >rape
>MFW approx 30 emergency vehicles are literally audible in the background.
Sorry fam, I gotta check on this. I wish I was exaggerating.
Report back faggot, I didn't get on for nuthin
Be safe, m8.
If you don't come back, I'll cut off Thez's feminine penis.
>>5008>feminine penisTRAPS ARE STILL GAY
>Assuming GM isn't caught up in a happening
Trumpaladin returns from booking a flight, and is ready to enter the ant colony
No denial, OP hinted at it in earlier threads though.
>>5012>runs from pyramid because ants
>>5013>picks up Tourcil and physically brings him back to the entrance
>Feels fine, having already made a peace-offering to the ants.
>>5014>Something something "free inhabident" something something "this is rape"
*brushes across leg, like a cat
*trump shakes his head*
"damn 'sovereign citizens'">>5017>>5015It would please me to bring more peace offerings
So, where is our merry crew of 3 goingalso gm, when you get back can I please have that list of staff powers?
Gm, you okay?
The long term goal, besides converting all of the inhabitants of this world to the one true football, is to kill the Terrasque. But before that, we need to uncover all of the powers of the Pyramid, and all of the secrets of the past party. To do that, we need the manual contained in the boiler room (or whatever) near the treasury at the bottom of the pyramid. For some reason the entrance is blocked off through the pyramid itself, and the only way to it is through the ant colony, hence why we are there. As for how we get through the ant colony, I think we just pay them off and see if they let us pass
So, when ya gonna put me down?
I don't know, when are you going to commit to going inside the ant colony?
I am at the will of the meme magic
"Well, those bugs *huff* did invite us to come visit them. It could be a trick though.."
they arent all gonna worship football. not while infenuis here.
Another best pone lover
*Trump takes notice of the Blue One*
"You find those horses already?"Be prepared to purge heretics if necessary
"~Nnnh.. Yeah, that shoundn't be a problem anymore."
"Well it's a problem for me if I don't have either a quick means of transportation or the money I spent on the horses"
So are we going in?
>>5031Shouldn't we wait on GM to determine if the ants accept our offer and allow passage? Or what we encounter as soon as we enter?
"Don't worry, Flashy. All the mount positions are filled."
Good point...>insert spongbob timecards
*looks at the blue one puzzled*
What ever happened to the unicorn?
"I found new horses. There shouldn't be any problems now.">snuggle>>5036Still in the stables (but you don't know that). GM said she was there to keep me from murdering the hoers again.......
>>5036So apparently your horse was never a unicorn. As for the ghost/god/demon thing, I am not sure. It probably disappeared>>5037
"what? New horses? Where?"
>>5038I was told she'd still be there.
"In the stables."
No no no, I know my horse wasnt one, I mean the one tracy fought
Unicorn was too OP to call that a fight. She teleported into the stables, and is still there.
Trump heads on to the stables
>>5042GM has to voice the unicorn though, doesn't he?
Sadly youre right
Pretty sure she's mine
How about we let the unicorn decide?
>>5047>Giving women the right to choose
You know, I'm automatically attracted to beautiful mares - I just start riding them them. It's like a magnet. Just ride. Don't even wait. And when you're a Paladin, they let you do it. You can do anything.
Grab 'em by the horn?
I tried: it doesn't work.
You can do anything
half worship football, half worship hitler(through many denominations, sound good?
Try taking her out furniture shopping
If that'll let me stab that cunt, I'll give it a shot.
All worship Football, All worship Hitler
So I can sleep?
I'm going to hit the hay too.....
>>5059>still not sure what habbened, cuz no news reports or w/e
Sorry if it turns out to be a nothing-burger. Friggin' exhausted though. Off next three days so I'll be all up innit. Sorry, but 'night.
Apparently a fire broke out in the hills (dense forest) and the parade of emergency vehicles was rapid response to see that it didn't turn into something serious.
No, Thez is entirely female and lacking anything resembling a benis. She does get kinky w/ her tail tho.
>>5061>lacking anything resembling a benis
Not anymore she doesn't.
Okay, there is now 2 hoers in the stable, one a majestic and regal unicorn that could theoretically be grabbed by the horn, though Tracy tried to cut it OFF, which it would have none of. The other is the previously murdered yet somehow present and very disposed against Tracy ninja-hoers. I'm sure that will be explained in time.>>5063
Oh? I don't recommend attempting to cut it off if that's what you're thinking.
If you like, I can go into exquisite detail about Thez and her accoutrements (many of which are magical and relate to her evolution as a player/villain, yes she has performed as a villain on several occasions) but suffice to say that if successful, cutting her tail off would result in a specific turn of events that would be adverse in the least.
Nah... And it wasn't her tail.
>>5068>not just linking to the post>>3647 →
>>5069That was a subtle Xp
>>5062>She does get kinky w/ her tail tho.
Infernuis get tail pegged?
im glad you're alright gm anon
I'm surrounded by a town, I'm the last to be in danger. I appreciate your concern though, the sudden cacophony of sirens was a little alarming.>pegged
I never described what happened.
You said my asshole hurt, i can only ASSume.
I'm sure it was the tacos.
It was pretty heavily implied.
Also, stop fapping to >no hooves futa porn.
Great advice, but thanks to horsepussy I've been nofap for months now.
>>5074>Oh that explains everything.
Can I be a Wizard with a level 1 Cloistered Cleric dip?
I won't say no, but I would like to know how you might explain that working? I mean, clerical magic is submissive, while wizardry (do you mean wizard or sorcerer, cuz they're different; sorcerer is inherent magic, wizard is songs, dances, diagrams, components) is dominant.
I think you scared him.
I hope not, that wasn't my intention. I don't know if he intended to, but he touched on a philosophical point that is often overlooked, gaming or otherwise. Again, I haven't said no, but its not a "Sure go ahead" type of scenario.
Do minotaurs come in different bovine breeds?
Probably is the best answer. I mean, are we talking MLP canon, mythological, etc? There's only been 1 minotaur in MLP so there's nothing to derive from there, and mythologically speaking there's only one particular example I can think of. This begs the question of whether minotaurs are a chimera of sorts, or whether they are an evolutionary species. I'm inclined to say "Yes", but they're so few and far between that I would instead table the question with a "I'll answer that when the next minotaur shows up.You asked
Come back. Its not that scary i promise.
Infernius should be a Nazi cow, in respect to all of the ones who got shoahed into sausages a couple years back.https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/worldviews/wp/2015/01/07/aggressive-nazi-bred-cows-caused-havoc-on-a-modern-farm/?utm_term=.ae22c62db7cbhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Heck_cattle#Controversy>Behavior isn't genetic! Stop being racist!>You have to shoah almost every one of these Nazi cows, because they're irrationally violent and one of them killed a Jew!
Scary no, disturbing,...? ^_~
Seriously though, the cleric/wizard question is one I often get when I am inviting new players so I'll expound a bit. Wizardry is its own field of specialty that requires rigorous hours and intensity to be able to effectively work/master. It involves countless hours of study, experimentation, and ingenuity. Conversely, Sorcery involves reaching within one's self to determine one's full capacity, in spite of differing potential (and prescription) from the society the character inhabits. Simply, wiz/soc's are entirely sovereign in their practices and disposition. Clerics on the other hand spend the majority of their time and effort seeking to be closer to a God/ideal, which is largely prescribed. Many examples exist of clerics and priests who slough off the established doctrines, but all in favor of determining the mindset/desires of the chosen/sponsoring deity. Again, this is submissive (not being derisive with that) and runs contrary to the alternative.
In my experience, peeps who want to play both are often trying to have the best of both worlds without really getting into what makes a cleric, wizard, or sorcerer so the standard answer is no (excepting a damn good reason).
K, so since everyone is somewhere in the vicinity I'm going to state at the outset that I'm NOT going to exhaustively map the anthill, pic related (inverted for proper perspective). The amount of area the players will actually venture vs. the whole of the anthill is minute. There will be basic "You're here, there's these exits", and depending on choices you may find yourself winding back and forth (not excessively, that's just boring). Having said, I am going to attempt to authentically portray the environment while making it enjoyable for the players.
>>5087>tfw my paint program sucks and i cant recolor a cow.
I like the breed.>>5084
Do you care if im a heck gm?
Am i at the dais yet or no?>>5058
Yep. AFAIK everyone (except maybe Tracy) has made their way to the pyramid. Players are welcome to decline,... but that's the best place to be unless I'm gonna have to do more frantic mapping and deciding that will probably be inconsistent or non-compelling.
They really are beautiful, even if they have genocidal tendencies:>Some of Derek Gow's cows terrified him. "If I was standing here and some of the more aggressive ones were in this field, and they could see me, then they would come right across now and try and kill you," he told the BBC. Those cows would charge "with every intention of wiping you off the face of this Earth," he said from his farm.
Coming from the guy who owned them.
It's actually quite the interesting article. They were wild cows with ancient roots, coming from a project to breed-back the extinct Auroach cows.
It makes perfect sense too, given that Minotaurs are predisposed to chaos (usually evil, but exceptions) and are particularly large and often brutal.
Yeah. A minotaur, just by default, is already imbued with quirks from the "beast" archetype; having massive, non-human bodies and charging into their enemies.
I never imagined a Minotaur cleric before, but Nazi cleric really does work in this case.
It goes great with Kord, a chaos god of war and battle, not dissimilar to Thor (or Odin for that matter).
Technically, I mean every archetypal icon which represents the same thing, but yes Rockwell.
Is there any other way I can enhance my equipment or whatnot to increase my stats or range of abilities?
Of course, but I only know for certain of one person in the mix who can craft objects like you describe, and you'll have to make it worth his while.
I'll try that later then.
Don't worry, I've already worked out a more 'reasonable' alternative. He'll be along shortly.
Ifernuis want magic cock ring.
Funny enough, its not the first time. Can do, but you don't get any more rings just 'cuz (only 2 magic rings can be active at any time).
Beware of overly friendly whores, that's all I'm gonna say.
He was an orphan raised in a monastery, but he sucked at the combat stuff and only really wanted greater knowledge and greater power. Sure, he'd be Good, but he didn't see the point in being super religious about it. He ended up becoming a Cloistered Cleric. But it still wasn't for him, and he made the leader of a monastery he used to study at hate him with all the questions and logical thought and stuff, so he spent years studying in secret, pretending to be focused on holy studied. He eventually dropped out and became a Wizard as soon as he was old enough.
Now, if anyone asks, he tells people he's a wizard, and makes up some bullshit about studying alone in some farm's attic in return for aiding with the crops if anyone presses him on a backstory. If anyone questions his occasional Cleric spell or how he can do things normally only possible for Cloistered Clerics of Time and Animals, he says, in his own words, "I'm a very good Wizard".
Sounds good. Got a name? ^_^
Should it be a pony or human name?
What specieses are on the table? What buffs do they grant?
How does the Wizard spell-memorization work? Should I list every spell I prepare each day?
How do days work?
Are you a pony or a human (I'm the only pony here; pls be a hoo-man).
bad thot, let him pick his race.
Good questions. It can be a pony or human (or other) name. I'm open to species (nothing ridiculous, no dragons or w/e, I've learned my lesson on that) and buffs will be respective of the species vs. humans.
Wizard spells are as normal, except not based on a 'days' method, more based on a 'segment/session' basis (meaning, spells can be replenished by resting or devoting time, and if time is unavailable I'll say so). I don't require that you specify spells to memorize (tho I do keep track of what you've cast) as its consistent with wizards to regularly do that when available (desu, the memorization process makes sense but is unnecessarily cumbersome).
Days aren't rigid, we just kinda go with it. There's been only one(two?) incidents of night activity, but I really don't care to be THAT rigid about things. Don't be egregious and it probably won't come up.
There is currently one pony, one minotaur, 2 humans, one other, and one other-other. There's also an orc, but he's more there to kill things if I want them killed and don't want to leverage existing characters.
No no, you got to do it like thisBEGONEEGONEGONEONENEETHOTHOTOTT
[angry THOT noises emmanate from indeterminate direction]
Hello, what kind of wizard are you building?
Game over man, Game over.
He's already well established. He's the guy in the tartan harry-potter robes with a beard.
he uses meme magic.
How dare you insult me
The correct term is Gandalf you pleb>>5122
But Harry-potter robes fit the theme better, all that pleating and such
ha the gm called you a faggot.
Hardly, those robes are chic
*keens edges again, because why not*
GM, do I still have to be in the pyramid?
Gandalf does actually fit here
Case in point, I am not a faggot
That depends on what you are planning. If you're going to be around for the ants, it would be best. If you are planning on venturing solo, no, but don't be surprised if you get eaten. This IS supposed to be something of a group effort,....
I had no idea wardrobe particulars were that important. Shall I detail what Thez is 'wearing'?
Just do a Merlin theme: he has Scottish origins anyway.
>>5132I wouldn't have brought it up, but you said that faggot ass harry potter>>5133
I completely forgot about Merlin
im at the dais ask me about going tracy.
There's also Michael Scott: the Scottish wizard who tutored the Pope.>>5135I need to stay in character. Why would Tracy ask you?
I'm not sure I follow
im large i can kill alot of ants
>>5140I was just going to explore the around the surrounding areas down the paths, not the ants.
TY, this is going on my playlist for work. ^_^
Tracy decides she's sick of everyone in the pyramid, and decides to explore down the path outside the pyramid, in stealth, this time taking the right path into the other side of the forest.
What does she see?
oh well me misunderstand.
~_~' If you're totally resolved on that course of action I won't stop you, but I can guarantee neither quality, refinement, nor (desu) sanity. I AM the one illustrating all this after all, and you've SEEN Thez,....
Not really resolved, just exploring.
I do need a few minutes though
[1d20 = 5]
roll for detection
We need a bard so we can have beautiful music like this
meme man take level in bard?
I can do that?
Alright, what degree of exploring are we talking? Do you mean the circular walled area, or do you mean beyond?
yea you can its a dnd mechanic. can he take a bard level gm?
Don't expect more at first level than "amateur/bad music", but I don't see why not. Music is an easily explained side-interest for a wizard.
Check out the circular walled area first.
Tracy is bored, and she's walking around as she ponder a way to get home and finish her wedding ceremony. Ponies need to walk, or they get crazy.
>>5155>Bagpipes descend into Torcuil's arms
PREPARE YOUR ANUS
Trumpaladin is stuck in traffic
The walled area is overgrown with brush and standing/fallen trees and assorted vegetation. Anything useful/interesting is probably at LEAST 6' down.>>5159
So what are dem ants doing
Outside the wall you find that the walled area sits atop the peak of a decent sized mountain. Toward the back there is a pile of boulders reaching toward the top of the wall, but otherwise there is a sheer cliff face. Below the cliff is a descending plain with intermittent water-channels that leads toward a heavily walled city ringed with turrets (thats to the south). The east and west cliff ends leading to separate(?) large bodies of water, eliminating the possibility of travel (without a boat). The city to the south COULD be reached by climbing, but it would take alot of time and careful progress (meaning, if you were pressed for time, you could end up falling). No threats are present, but you recognize that the south cliff makes for both a significant obstacle as well as a strategic position in the event of invasion or incursion.
I was gonna wait on Trump for the ants, but you're welcome to approach
>>5160>doesn't feel like climbing
Can I climb just a bit more, to get a closer look at the city?
The city is pretty nondescript, cannons notwithstanding. Of note is that all the cannons are pointed in the direction of the cliff you're standing on (they're not aiming at you/it, they're just pointed that way, and no I'm not trying to discourage you, there's a story element to it). The city its self appears drab and uniform, lacking any aesthetics.
*narrows eyes at city, enjoying the fresh air*
"Who aims cannons at a mountain..?" she ponders, beginning to wonder about the sadistic beings who brought her to the pyramid in the first place.
"Whatever..." *turns around, and heads back to the pyramid*
As you turn back to the wall, Slag is standing there looking gruff and aloof.
"That city was once on the north face of the cliff. They're idiots, and are not deserving of mercy. I look forward to killing them a second time."
*walks by him* "..You and I could get along..." she says quietly as she passes by
He snorts in reply.
*keens edges again, out of pure boredom*
*Walks up to the unresponsive Flashy, and begins to cuddle leg*
Is there a training range in the pyramid?
Yes, but its buried atm.
>>5178Is that a green light?!
Trumpaladin, buying peach rings in some store off a highway in rural Texas, shakes the pony off of his leg
Technically it was a green-text, but it served its purpose to gauge where Trump was at. ^_~
>OP is a misdirecting faggot XD
texas? only steers and queers come from texas. and you aint got no horns boy.
thanks, infernuis just polished them.
Totally aside, but am I the only person who when putting "Peach Rings" into duckduckgo gets a browser-tab label of "Peach Rings (Harry Potter) at DuckDuckGo"
Well, I don't want to go into TOO much detail, but its in the section of the building that is largely inhabited by ants.
no. i did find a vape site that sells them though.
Must just be me. More evidence to toss Mozilla I guess.
also duckduckgo servers are hosted in isreal fyi.
I bet they love me then! XD
"Why do all his searches have Pony after Apr. 1st?"
is britanon still around?
I sure hope so, Lenos' faggot gets a kick every time I tell him someone... starts playing.
hows he feel about me?
good, thats what i was going for.
Incidentally (another aside) when did you get the dixie flag?
i just checked its been about 22 days why?
lotus(best mod) changed it for me.
Curiosity. I expected more anons to sport it given interest (previous)
as far as i know,im the only anon that has it.
He could easily be asleep. It's 2:20 AM in Britain.>>5205
Does he browse here?
Are we going to do shit, or what?
Kernav makes a great donk.
tracy would too tbh
>>5217If shit doesn't start happening fast, I'm gonna start doing shit to the other characters...
do it it'll be funny
Sorry, I was busy doxxing myself. I'm good to go.
>>5224I'll give them a while to avoid drama.
I did it on purpose XP>>5226
Lenos offers a spray-can and a lighter.
~Yay! Thanks Lenos (although I'm not sure if my character has met him yet).
>>5228>Port Arthour FalseFlag?
You might not have seen him, but he's seen you and you're entertaining.
Trumpaladin addresses the party: "I've travelled a great distance to be here tonight. Believe me"
He addresses the ants, and with essentially the same proposition as made in the previous thread, apologizing for the first encounter, and offering the bread loafs. He asks for Sade passage through to the pyramid's inner areas. He now adds peach rings to the offering
For clarification, Lenos' prime motivator is boredom (and the alleviation of). Slag's prime motivator is crushing anything he perceives as an opponent. Thez's prime motivator is getting her goddamn record contract back, and killing those who give her warrant.
This is all undisclosed in character dialogue, but in many RPGs its common to elucidate the NPCs (or GM controlled PCs) disposition.
K, Trump is taking initiative, is everyone else rdy to go?
you have infernuis sword.
Where he goes, I go.
Torc? I know its late, but,....
Maybe I'll just stir his haggis....
Can we at least get a response by the ants to Trump's initial statements?
>>5241>Implying I care to go into details for what just happened to him
Torquil's haggis is now officially stirred. Let us never speak of it again, unless it somehow becomes funny.
I totally forgot! As this (pretty much OOC) dialogue commences, a dude in a jumpsuit (not Barry) falls from the sky and >splat< on another part of the pyramid (will provide images).
Strangely, the same fellow falls again on the pyramid with a >splat<,... and again >splat<
Initiate my Thief quirks and loot his corpse(s), for clothes/items.
You find cans of copenhagen
BTW, looting corpses is not a thief skill, its just good business.
Can I take his clothes for fabric?
Of course! Take his skin if you want, it will make work that much more enjoyable!
Do I have any Thief quirks? I know in RPs, some items can only be obtained by rogues.>>5250>doesn't bother to take skin, because she already has more skins than she knows what to do with
Thief (not exclusive) quirks include:
Hiding/sneaking, picking pockets, picking locks, sleight of hand, climbing, escape artist,... I'll probably think of others but those are the main ones.
NO TOUCHIN ME HAGGIS>>5243
Alright (tracy seems like more of a Bandit, but I'll take everything I can get).
>>5254Side note though, Haggis is amazing
Rogues come in all shapes and sizes. Robin Hood was a rogue, as was Jack the Ripper.
You let your guard down during The Game. Let this be a warning.
Haggis = stirred
Yes of course. The ants at the entrance have no vocal cords, but they applaud and seem quite pleased at your arrival. They seem quite welcoming, and gesture you inside.
Assuming no objection, upon entry you're greeted with the Potato who greets you overly enthusiastically (with a taller ant behind him making the same gestures, as though one is puppeting the other).
"Welcome Hewoes! It is our gweat pweasuwe to wewcome you to <sighs contentedly> the hive. Would you wike a touw?"
"It seems like they want us to go inside, ~Flashy."
*rubs chest fluff on leg*
"We have many vawieties of intewests to appease your pwedilections. Do you pwefer tasty noms? We have lots of foo care of,... well that one thewe!" he says pointing at Tracy, and then at Torcuil.
"If you pwefer to kill youw food, thewe is the awmy corps, and in addition thewe's the geo-engineews."
yes show infenuis hive!
"Spwendid! It is our pweasure to welcome you to <sighs contentedly> the hive."
He leads the way.
>>5265>Tracy considers intimidating the ant to shut him up about the horses, but gives up the prospect as it seems to be beyond the ant
"Yeah... Did you guys, by any chance, build your hive into a weapons practicing room..?" (wants to test out kunai)
*get's on hind legs and gently leads the unresponsive paladin into the Hive*
(assuming no one is falling behind, not that its bad if they do, but if they do please note so they can be redirected,... ants are particular)>>5270
"Why yes, we have a wawwiors area designated fow kiwwing and muwdew. Also, there is the pwactice awea fow NOT kiwwing, but just beating. Awso, we have foosball!" he is ecstatic about that.
Trumpaladin shakes off the Thot, and travels into the hive following the potatoe
I follow really damn confused
*Interest slightly peaked*
"You mean, like virtual divegrass, only not virtual? I think I'll check it out.">>5273
Follows closely behind.
show me this foosball.
"You like the foosball? Swendid!"
He leads you to an open area where there is a small table with rods sticking out of it.
"Not only is this our weweation awea, but this is also how we solve ouw differences!" He intones, most triumphantly.
>>5277>Is oddly relaxed in the dank room crawling with bugs
"Heh, it's just like home."
On either side of the table are a pair of ants, larger than most you've seen, who clearly are engaged in a vicious struggle (by their estimation). After a few moments, one gestures in triumph, while the other hangs its head. As it does so, another pair of larger ants walk up next to it and decapitate it.
"Too bad, he had so much pwomise. Shall we continue?" says the Potato.
infernuis want play! who challenge me?
"We have nevew had pawticipants at the hive volunteew for the foosball on theiw fiwst day! You are WELCOME to pway!"
The 'winning' ant nods to the ants around him, clearly thinking you'll be easy to defeat.
"Yep, just like home alright..." (in a somewhat more grim tone)
"Two challengers? This is unpwecidented! I must infowm the Queen (he leans his head to the side for a moment) the Queen has agweed to youw challenge, and you awe welcome to foosball!"
The surrounding ants gesture in what would appear to be a cheer, except no noise emits, its just body language.
i drink my cats grace potion.
You feel significantly more agile.
Nobody can beat Tracy Cage at Murder Ball.
i walk up to the table.
So, Infernius made first claim, Torcuil made second. Tracy can play next if she prefers.
Thez is shaking her head.
[1d20 = 11]>>5290
Just wanna say
Honor playing with you guys
>>5291>Would like to see training room before the blood-orgy that would ensue once one of these idiots gets decapitated
"You numbskulls wanna' see the rest of the hive or not?!"
[1d20 = 15]>>5292>>5294
AND Torcuil wins, 11 to 4. The ants gesture in celebration and applause. A pair of ants approach Infernius from both sides.
All players, please roll a d20 for initiative.
Trumpaladin pulls out his football, ready and eager
[1d20 = 17]>>5294
*humps leg to build energy for the blood-orgy*
[1d20 = 7]>>5296
As one of the larger ants begins to reach for Infernius' head, Thez takes its hands off.
"I had a feeling it would go like this!" she laments.
Tracy, your move.
>>5303>Your moveYou mean at foosball, or diplomacy?
Other players can declare their moves, but it will occur upon a timeline determined by the initiative roll
What he said, they were/are about to take Infernius' head off
[1d20 = 9] >>5306
goes for an overhead slash>inb4 1
[1d20 = 1]>>5307
Uhhh *checks list*
I'll cast a magic missile
whats up with these rolls man?
Description - combat works a little different in that initiative roll gives "placement" on a scale of action. The initial scale determines a character's ability to act, and from there their actions determine delay. Simple actions take less time and can advance the character's initiative position, or full round actions can maintain them.
Trumpaladin is ready to play ball
[1d20 = 6]
>There's gotta be at least 6 gorillion ants down here in the tight corridor
"H-h-hay! Shouldn't we finish the tours first? It'd be a shame if BBQ sauce missed out on the party... He can be pretty funny, after all..."
*holds spray can behind back*
I'm assuming you're targeting the ant currently targeting Infernius (cuz as yet, none are apparently hostile)
Boof-boof-boof the other ant falls dead.
"What awe you doing! We thought you wewe pwaying foosball! This is not foosball, this is anawchy!" the Potato cries, and as he does so, the surrounding ants charge forth.
If you were here IRL, I would force you to listen to battle music at this point.
>>5311Choosie hates you
Tell a joke!
>>5309luckily for you, magic missile doesn't miss
"Stupid, fucking bovine!"
*draws knives and retreats towards Flashy*
uh uh, the jews dindu nuffin the mean goyim ripped them off and lied about them.
Also, I'm assuming ur using the staff, cuz casting it independently would be silly at this point (its unlimited via the staff)
Trumpaladin screams out at all participants, and raises his hands in a "stop" position
"Now hold hol' the fuck up"
>>5322>Implying I wouldn't use the staff>>5323>fucks are holded up
"We play nothing but the one true football!"
>didn't even meet the Queen....
Me just wanted to play fooseball!
Casts Righteous Might, an area of effect spell that effects the party.>>5320
Well played, this bard/mage thing may work out well
>>5327>knows the conditions for playing>plays anyway
Pussy. You don't play murder ball, unless you're prepared to face the consequences.
Infernius takes a hit to his shoulder, while Thez (?) takes one in the leg. IDK about Infernius, but she's mad.
"YA DONE FUCKED UP THIS TIME!"
I'll get a playlist put together for this by tomorrows play time
Oh please do, that was great
Its Trump's move, but again anyone can declare
Trumpaladin casts TRAVEL BAN, which pauses the ants long enough for him to figure out what the hell is going on
>tfw no new friends to celebrate cult of ritualistic, sacrificial divegrass in underground lair
[1d20 = 6]>>5333
I roll to levitate, 1 is nothing 20 is roof level
>>5334>ants freeze for an indestinguishable amount of time (not long mind you)
Success, you're about 7' off the ground.
Trump shouts out to all parties, "why the hell is a game of football turning violent. This is real, American football. Not soccer. Wars are not supposed to be fought over this"
Glares at Tracy, because he doesn't know why the hell there is fighting, but she seems to have started it
Essentially Trump is directing this at the ants, trying to engage them diplomatically
And how tall are the ants again?
I decide to wait for Trump to finish
The drones are about 4', the warriors are about 6'.
The ants who hear stare incomprehensibly. What is foosball without the loser losing their head? Otherwise is blasphemy.
"So you want to play football then?" He raises his ball. "When and where?"
"He-hay! Look at this!"
*produces soccer ball made out of the skin on copper's ass from bag*
"I thought I'd bring your queen a gift. It's like a foosball, but life-sized! Whjy don't we all go and give it to her?">>5340>football
Foosball is table-soccer. It's a demonic practice.>>5347
Stop doing shit, you fucking bull!
Delet this. Learn to diplomacy!
[1d20 = 18]>>5345
Great, barely above the heads.
Roll for detection
I want to scan the room
fine i hold my move untill shit goes sideways.
The Potato shouts, amidst the crisis "HEWOES! THEWE APPEAWS A GWAVE MISUNDERSTAINDING! We apologize for not infowming eawliew, but the losew of the game is fowfeit. Why would anyone want to keep awound a faulty specimen?"
So we can't leave until someone dies?
Noted, you now have veto-move (meaning you can interject at any time)
Trumpaladin delivers a death glare at the soccer ball, and unsheathes Vanderiem, now paying no attention to the ants
ALMOST in response to your inquiry, Thez rips through a few more ants.
"Oi, this isn't a game anymore!" she says, decapitating another and gutting (in a manner, they have exoskeletons so its more like a caving in) another's abdomen.
"It's rigged. It's always rigged.." she says under her breath
How did they appreciate my soccer ball? I was saving it for ritualistic purposes, but I hope it'll stop the blood orgy.>>5355Come and get it!
"Ahh, naw ye're talkin lad! Let's gets to separating the wheat from the chaff!">>5357
Psst, it won't
How many are in the room before I waste a spell
>>5358>I unveiled my secret weapon for no reason
Awww... I was hoping to at least give it to the queen...
Minus the existing casualties, II'd say about 40, though they're mostly drones.
[1d20 = 12]>>5361
Roll for a cone of cold to freeze these fuckers
>>5360there'll be plenty more
Tracy has first move, I'm assuming murder?
Trumpaladin serves upon Tracy a form I-862 - a Notice to Appear before an immigration court. Because such blasphemy must be physically removed
Wew, you threw me off with that one,... I'm almost willing to allow it to be a spell like effect for the degree of confusion I currently experience
>>5364>Appears visibly hurt
"B-b-b-but I'm so good at it...! And I was born in Texas..."
[18d20 = 175]
Okay, Tracy loses her move aaaaand the ants are attacking.
gawd these ants suck
Torcuil takes a grazing swipe while Tracy takes a slash across the face (oh yes, deal w/ it Xp).
*hold up soccer ball in front of face to blok slash*
infernuis whisper Kek.
towards the ants.
"Sorry guys... We could've been friends..."
*Takes out spray can and shakes it*
How far are we from the exit?
>>5371too late, atk has already landed
You can revise your move if you like.>>5372
You're asking "why?" in the middle of a fight? Forfeit!>>5373
And with a resounding "Kek" (though whispered,... which kinda fits when you think about it) waves of ants are not only bowled over, but obliterated. Even the Potato (who I had planned as being a recurring character) is obliterated by the utterance of Kek. The room is now clear except for heaps of ant-goo, a foosball table, and the door leading toward the entrance and "further".
Trumpaladin removes still more legal forms from his pack, and addresses the ants. "I charge you all as EXCLUDABLE, and accordingly, REMOVABLE, for having entered the Pyramid and this land without inspection by an immigration officer at an approved point of entry, pursuant to INA 212a"
thez bring back potato.
(the ants in the room are in pieces, revise your statement)
No no no, why did I swipe when I casted
Also I guess cancel last spell
*light soccer ball on fire and kick it into the advancing crowd of ants*
Trump addresses Tracy, "all detainees alleging a defense on the grounds of birthright citizenship have the obligation to produce documents to verify their claim"
The ants (in the room) r dead. There's no (immediate) threat. I'll assume you didn't do that, cuz you wouldn't needlessly. (or would you?)
"I, I, I... I've got a recently-made piece published by my creator, who is a confirmed Texas resident and citizen."
[1d20 = 10]>>5383
Are there more ants coming?
roll for detection
[1d20 = 11]>>5384
meant for >>5382
"Sorry Tracy, but for children born out of wedlock after 1986, you must have, in addition to the father's acknowledgement of the child as his own, an agreement in writing to for the father support the child until she is 18"
"Why should I? Its not like,... oh fine."
She says as she wraps her body in gauze.
"I'm keeping track though," she says as she produces a random-looking stick from her 'back pocket' (non-lewd, its the quiver).
She pokes the potato, and as his body reconstitutes her body splays signs of damage equal to the Potato's (which are extensive, given the spell).
She slumps down, unable to stand effectively, while the Potato awakes with a start.
Not immediately, but give it a second
We're talking pony years, right?
"Somehow I doubt there is court precedent on the subject"
"It held up at the marriage licensing office..."
"GASP" says(?) the Potato, while Thez starts gurgling, unable to speak.
"Whatevew happened? I don't know whewe I am! Who awe you people? This isn't my home? I DON'T KNOW WHEWE I AM!" the Potato starts screaming.
"Yghhhhwlelegiiggll," Thez attempts to say.
"I.. I think we should go..!"
*pony ears detect more ants coming*
"Unless any of you idiots have a plan?"
Success, there ARE more ants coming, from both sides.
"Ehrweggemend chshsirrlin deill fmruurrdesd," Thez states
Uhhh>kicks potato across the room>>5394
WHAT ABOUT THEZ
[1d20 = 11]>>5393
calm down me friend
[1d20 = 8]
Trumpaladin gauges to see whether the new ants coming in are trying to attack or not
Thez is more of a lump of flesh then a bipedal organism at this point. I suppose you could describe her as a overly slumped over pile of flesh, but I digress.
"Bdddhch chmurbbbbel kat usssa bieishdee plumr," she almost seems to shrug, except at the moment she lacks motor control.
*herbivore ears detect predators on both sides, causing uncontrollable agitation*
"..Ah fuck..!">>5402>Notices perfect opportunity to cut-off tail
She's still quite alive, but don't expect anything particularly dexterous from her at the moment. She's getting better though, she just started moving her leg.
Please confirm, you're doing this? You can, unobstructed.
*quickly takes tail, and stuffs it in bag, without Thez noticing*
[2d20 = 8]>>5402
I levitate thez to keep her safe while casting a magic missile to kill ants
There is no "without Thez noticing". Its her tail ffs. But, since you done did it,...
Thez's (or rather, the pile of flesh that is weirdly still animate and yet is still Thez) eyes glaze over. The pile becomes still.
At the same time, scores of larger ants pour into both sides of the room, armed with pikes and spears levelled at the party.
The potato screams to the ants "I had nothing to do with it!! This is entwely outside my intentions inand around the hive! PWEASE!" he screams at the incoming ants.
You can do one or the other. Me, I'd go with the magic missile.
An advancing ant falls dead
me protect you potato!>ready an attack.
>>5409>that's going to come back to haunt me
Use "flamethrower" on advancing ants to 'kill it with fire'.
Trump? Tracy? Infernius? Torcuil? Waiting on you (unless you want the ants to have their way with you)
I'll do that
What would I have to roll to kill an ant with the potato
Trump smites the ants with Vanderiem
>>5414>not an actual potato.
[1d20 = 17]>>5413
I was still using my makeshift flame thrower.
[1d20 = 5]>>5411
Infernius adopts a stance to protect the Potato (gallant, you may get extra exp in paladin).>>5412
You have no idea, but the flame-thrower works fine. The ants are not stupid and quickly scramble out of range, but you do buy yourself some time.>>5415
[1d20 = 9]
With an exquisite swing,... Trump misses,...
[1d20 = 16]
And then cleaves an ant in twain.
[1d20 = 16]
And then another.
[1d20 = 17]
And then ANOTHER
(Its not a flood, I swear)
[1d20 = 12]>>5416
I didn't ask you
I roll to throw the potato ass shit bag at an ant
[2d20 = 11]
*focus ears for detection*
How many more ants?
*stabs at nearest ant*
[1d20 = 14]
Still more ants fall to Vandereim under Trump's mighty swings (mighty cleaving is a most effective skill)
[1d20 = 2]
Trump is on a roll. Every roll that is over 10 equals another kill and another strike
Can I attack on auto too?
Ahh, too bad. After felling (what is it, 5?) ants, Trump comes to rest.
Normally no, that's a feat based on Vandereim (imagine a giant chisel, that when swing just kinda goes through things, thats what Vandereim is)
[1d20 = 12]>>5428
OH FUCK YOU
Why do you care about the tuber?
That's a level 5 spell, you're level 2.
he seem like good person.
The area IS more clear now, and Thez is almost speaking in detectable syllables.
"UUuu mfummm plllllusks!"
The potato has retreated into the ants, but you can still cast cryostasis if you like (or decide another move)
Not having yet liberated enough ants from their corporeal bondage, Trump takes another swing of his mighty Vanderiem the latter plays "Scotland the Brave"https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSH0eRKq1lE
How do levels work in this game? I thought we were all level 2?
[1d20 = 5]
Continues to slash next biggest ant
Damn acidental post
Can I finally get my shit agknowledged for once?
Roll for magic missile>>5439
Man, And I almost learned to play thaton bagpipesat least I can play on my ukulele
[1d20 = 18]
takes another slash
[1d20 = 18]>>5436
i cast mass blindness on the ants.
[1d20 = 3]>>5444
And I fucked up my die roll
[1d20 = 7]>>5447
*combine slashes with fire, to burn ants after wounding them (using both hooves and maw)*
[1d20 = 10]>>5448
[1d20 = 13]
Can I set any of these ants on fire?
>shouts to others
"So, what's the plan? Are we gonna just stand here and keep this charade going until we drop, or do we leave with Thez and Bubbles??
[1d20 = 2]
[1d20 = 9]>>5450
"What happened to Thez and who is bubbles?"
"Thez currently looks like some kind pile of slowly-regenerating hamburger: spell backfired or something. Bubbles is the weirdo who led us in: looks like the ants were controlling him!"
*moves towards Thez to start dragging her*
[1d20 = 6]>>5454>>5453
trump have plan?
Everyone is currently lvl 12>>5444
Another ant falls dead (there's still like 12 tho)>>5446
Success! The ants are blinded!
Okay from this point, the room is cleared again (due to ant blindness and murder).
Sorry 4 delay.
Room is TECHNICALLY non-hostile, but don't bet on it.
"Knock that retard (Bubbles) out before he hurts himself!
Thez is starting to almost pick herself upright "Brr curfuk whet oo whesh furrr" she says, slowly bringing herself afoot.
[1d20 = 19]>>5456
do i see potato?
[1d20 = 19]>>5454
"Thez can take it, and I think we knew bubbles was of the ants to begin with.">>5455
"I would have prefered not to fight, but it looks like our only real option now is to kill every single ant. I don't know if that can be practically done here. I would say kill the queen, but we simple have no idea where the queen is. In the mean time, so long as we can hold them off, we may as well proceed towards the Treasury"
"Whatever you say, Flashy!">Triple wields>Prepares for battle
[1d20 = 8]>>5461
*slashes nearest ant*
[1d20 = 17]>>5463>tfw I'm being punished for making a soccer ball
[1d20 = 3]>>5466>reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
[1d20 = 13]>>5460
[1d20 = 16]>>5468
[1d20 = 17]>>5467>fml
slash, combined with fire, for residual damages
[1d20 = 16]>>5469
"Everyone, proceed downward along this path, it goes to the treasury"
[1d20 = 14]>>5471
Another!I can keep slashing if it's higher then a 10 right?
[1d20 = 18]>>5472
[1d20 = 4]>>5470
Use fire to open path towards treasury can I get any intimidation boosts from my Bandit quirks?
And... I fall over
[1d20 = 5]>>5478
Wards off ants with fire-enhanced intimidation
The room remains clear, in spite of a regular input of ants. Trump, with those rolls does an excellent job of keeping the room 'stable', and Vandereim is laughing maniacally and streaming curses.
"Ahhhh! Ye silly twig-bugs haven't felt the likes of ME now HAVE ye!?"
Torcuil unleashes a blast of flame that covers the entrance, as Thez slowly regains her feet.
"Good show. Unfortunately, there's probably almost no end to them."
[1d20 = 8]>>5482
"We don't need to kill all of the ants, we just need to make it to the Pyramid's Treasury."
Trump pulls out his map of the pyramid. Roll to lead the team on the proper direction
Tracy slices through ant after ant. The drones stop coming from the rear, but there are still soldiers coming from the rear.
Thez "Omms" and seems to regain some fortitude (now that she can actually do anything) while Trump stands as vanguard at the door.
[1d20 = 15]>>5482
"/bug/s never know when to give up! They're almost all tenacious die-hards; and the ones that aren't are massive fruitcakes."
*Stabs ant in the thorax vagina*
[1d20 = 5]
infernuis stabs ants with his zweihander and makes ant kebab.
[1d20 = 10]
"Alright, proceed onwards!"
Trump goes to a passage way and enters, slashing at ants
Trump correctly determines the route to the treasury and begins to lead the way. Thez falls in along-side to (still weakly, but serviceably) assist and support (they're giving each-other flanking, allowing the one not being attacked to take an attack of opportunity against the one attacking,... a most effective strategy) to slowly make their way inward.
[1d20 = 2]
Trump slashes at ants while continuing to walk forward at steady pace
How is Thez attacking?
Infernius, with a resounding cry of "For Rockwell!" begins his assault, beginning with that 20 a few minutes ago, decimating further ants and helping claim another doorway (there's no doors here, but for simplicity's sake).
The party stands at the entrance to a large chamber, indistinguishable lights glittering in the distance.
How indeed, didn't someone take her tail? I had forgotten about that. Technically this whole thing should have gone far more sour than it did. I'll think on how to rectify that, but for the moment there are more pressing matters. Luckily, taking her tail does not prevent her from being effective,... rather it,... well you'll see.
[1d20 = 19]>>5490
Trump soldiers forth, casting OFFENSE upon the entire group
[1d20 = 4]
infernuis heal party when we get wounded. can i help thez with reform faster with healing?
[1d20 = 1]
push forward, blasting flames to stun ants before slashing
[1d20 = 12]
Tracy lights her mane on fire
[1d20 = 13]>>5497
I think that means another slash
[1d20 = 16]>>5498
[1d20 = 12]>>5500
He can't keep on winning
[1d20 = 9]>>5502
[1d20 = 1]
infernuis jump and cut one in half.
Douse self with slime from severed head.
*push through the ants with pony-rogue maneuverability and see what's on the other side of the hallway*
>>5492>everyone goes (without the hair) super-saiyan
Before the party stands the Queen in an expansive chamber lined with,... the same crystalline structure as the pyramid. In fact, it almost looks like a lower section of the Pyramid (cuz it is).
[1d20 = 5]>>5508
ANNND I can't do that..
*slash ant in front of me*
queen their has been misunderstanding.
Trump levels Vanderium at the Queen
"Alright everyone, looks like we found ourselves the Queen. Tracy and inferius, hold off these drones, while I attack!">>5511
"Diplomacy has been attempted and failed. The only misunderstanding was the belief we could negotiate with these insects."
"Impudent fool, what dare have you to even SPEAK to me!" She commands. And with it, a wave of weakness whooshes upon the party, negating the Offense.
[1d20 = 12]>>5514
"DIE INFERNAL BEAST!"
Trump charges at her with Vanderiem to deliver a slashing blow
About 18' tall, and about 30' long.
Also, she's squatted in the middle of a ridiculous pile of opulence. Piles of gold and gems litter the room, atop one pile of which is a very large and heavily bound book. Atop another pile is a glittering scroll, which Thez is immediately transfixed by.
"It... it is! I had... I thought,...." she begins to stammer.
[1d20 = 19]>>5516
*offers soccer ball*
[1d20 = 9]
"TRACY, GET THE BOOK AND THE SCROLL, AND WE CAN RUN THE HELL OUT OF HERE!"
Slashes at the queen again
Noted, but there's a distance you must close first unfortunately she casts a spell, and an almost impreceivable sphere appears around her.
Trump ignores the queen then, and goes straight towards the book
[3d8 = 18]>>5517
She fires a lightning bolt at you, just cuz why would she want a soccer ball?
The book is well within her protective magic sphere
[1d20 = 16]>>5521>it has magic
*block shot with soccer ball, causing it to explode*
*dive for the scroll (do I have a maneuverability/theft boost for my class)*
Thez is now going apeshit. Not at the queen or any perceived threat, but at the sphere around the scroll. She clearly has little else on her mind.
[1d20 = 2]>>5522
Beat the sphere then, with mighty Vanderiem!
"Ping pong, even if you did land a good roll"
"Hahahaha! You fools, did you think you could upset the Law!?">>5527
Ooooh, that would've been an excellent move, except,...
"Enough! AS ABOVE SO BELOW!!" As she intones these words, several effects occur. All the party's hearing is nulled, replaced by a shrill ringing. Each member is now deafened. In addition, each member is having difficulty moving (slowed).
"Did you think you could venture into MY realm and have YOUR way with things? Repent!"
She says, preparing another spell.
Taze, in spite of that magnificent die roll, is ineffective against a wall of force ~_~
[1d20 = 5]>>5528
Trump pulls out his copy of Super Bowl XXXII, and casts FOOTBALL with it
[1d20 = 11]>>5528
Aren't paladins immune to such effects?
*retreat behind corner and enact stealth, to recover briefly*
Thez continues to rail against the wall, with increasing force (including a particular technique which beams a 4' diameter tube of blackened-purplesque hatred-murder) to no effect.
[4d8 = 16]>>5530
"Ahhahahah! Impressive that you know the word of Football, but you are not strong enough to exert its force upon me! Despair that you have come here this night!
She unleashes a bolt of lighting that forks from player to player.>>5532
No just diseases and poisons. Slow still works.
Did that hit me? I thought I retreated and was in stealth.
Trumpaladin signals to the other players "follow me" with a motion of his hands, and runs back towards the door from whence they came
Trump mouths out "fall back, fall back," and continues again towards the door
charges towards the door
It's 2:15. Let's finish this quickly so I can go to bed.
Magic is irrespective of stealth, but duly noted.
"NO! I won't leave without my,... rahhhahhaahhahhhh!" Thez screams.
"Don't make me say it!"
[6d8 = 29]
The queen casts another bolt, this one striking Thez only.
Trumpaladin signals over to Thez, "leave"
[1d20 = 1]>>5544
oh shit i run over to thez, and grab her.
"Curse you all! I won't leave! No matter what it takes! That's MY property! Sod it all! Get out while you can! " she screams.
Trumpaladin runs out of the field of effect of the queen, and addresses the other party members
"Looks like we're not getting her shields down. Not at our current power levels, at least not with out Tourcil, though I'm not sure he could have made a difference. We need to set up shop in Port Barry before we return. But there may still be another way to reveal the secrets of the past. Not every link is in the form of an inanimate paper bundle. And I know how to make her talk"
You trip in the process
no infernuis not leave you behind!!
[1d20 = 1]>>5547
Trumpaladin reenters to remove Thez
[1d20 = 11]
>this would be a great time for the building to come down
Roll for enhanced trap detection
>>5553>Destroying our means to kill the Terraesque later
The queen laughs at your failures and fires off another lightning bolt.
"This is MY domain! Despair!" she cries triumphantly.
STOP FUCKING AROUND AND HELP THE PARTY! Retrieve Thez!
gets up, continues over to thez
>>5557Are we really just gonna retreat?
What did I detect?!
>>5559There are literally no other options available to us, unless your stealth is so good you can pierce shields to steal the book and the scroll. I recommend getting Thez drunk at a bar in Port Barry and seeing if she'll give us most of the information we wanted out of the book. But to do that, we need Thez to leave alive.
Nice gets, I was hoping to steal that myself, but oh well.
Thez, smouldering from several lightning bolts slumps in defeat. "Its come to this then has it? Very well. I'm not leaving without my contract."
She checks to see that the party is sufficiently out of range before addressing the queen.
"So you know the Dictum. Good for you, but there is something you DON'T know. Let me tell you!" She is veritably steaming energy and rage.
"Starlight Glimmer is best Pone!"
As Thez speaks these words, the party (just out of range, thankfully) is spared from the blackness that fills the room.
The blackness is a mix of undeath and perversion. It is a tangible madness mixed with suffering and rage. The whole gamut of negative and dissociative energies, the lot of which eliminates the Queen with a resounding <sphleugh>.
THAT, was Blasphemy
Oh God, I hope you didn't just summon greater evils!
holy shit!! THEZ NO!!!!!!
>>5562>was going to bait her into leaving with severed tail
Is she dead?
As glops of Queen slowly trickle down from the ceiling, Thez stands in the middle, completely exhausted. She slowly walks to the scroll and takes possession.
"At last," she says, taking possession of the scroll, before falling unconscious.
*Steals scroll from unconscious Thez*
The scroll is after all, her erstwhile record-contract. She lies on the floor, completely wasted and immobile, though clutchting the scroll as though her life depended on it.
The room is clear, the Owner's Manual (not to mention the PILE of gold and jewels) lay about, ready to be claimed.
*throws thez over shoulder*
Oh no. Cut her hands off if you want to take THAT.
"You fool! You did not merely utter blasphemy, nor did you simply speak evil. You uttered BAIT, evil not merely for what it is, but for what it brings"
Trumpaladin rushes forth to take the owners manual, and leaves in haste
But not before grabbing some gold and jewels... Cathedral not going to pay for itself
You have no idea, this sets in motion a series of events you'll have to wait to see.
[1d20 = 3]
perception for anything interesting.
*pockets as many shekels and special items as her saddlebags can carry*
"This'll make for a great wedding ceremony!"
WIth the Queen's death, her lock on teleportation ceases, and Lenos pops in unceremoniously. "Good, now we can get this bitch off the ground (talking about the building).
Hold onto your hats"
This was an unironic question
Tweaking some present circuitry, the whole place begins to shudder.>>5579
I won't say no, but its REAAAAAAALLLLLY not a good idea.
The building continues to quake, slowly lifting its self out of the ground.
im protecting thez currently
If this utterance is anything at all like the last time I heard those words spoken - from a distance - an entire pantheon of good and evil is about to converge on this location to do battle. GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN"
Trump runs like hell out of the area
>>5580>I won't say no, but its REAAAAAAALLLLLY not a good idea.
I what way?
*pocketing of shekels ceases*
After several minutes of quaking and shaking, with dirt and debris filtering out of the building, the entirety of the pyramid - its self but the pinnacle of a larger crystalline structure - slowly rises out of the ground, coming to rest hovering over the ground at about 100'.
"TRACY, YOU FOOL! IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE, LEAVE!"
It's a good thing Nigel didn't play tonight.>>5585
*runs like heck, deciding no to bother taking Thez's scroll*
*pockets shekels, as she waits for GM to respond*
I guess it's too late for you to escape then? It's been an honor playing with you>>5587The fact that he chose words that unironically and literally have the value to do serious harm makes this so much better
Trumpaladin gathers items of value and places them in a wagon lead by an ox, and heads for Port Barry, snatching up Tracy if she came within arms reach in that time
escape from what the building is rising out the ground.
"You needn't hurry. The building is now ours again, including the spoils (which were ours to begin with, but game resets and all). From here, we can go wherever we need/want. And I, I can fire up the forge!" Lenos says with a wink.
And THAT concludes the session.
The party now has access to literal piles of gold and gems, a variety of strewn about items, not to mention an entire facility (you thought the pyramid was big!) with elements that were not include-able in the upper section.
Yeah, I'll tell you all about it, but Tracy needs to sleep (and so do I). Besides, this thread is well past bump-limit.
Oh no you don't, you're still in the building! Also, you haven't explored the lower reaches, you'll like what you find there.
I DID say it was blasphemy didn't I? ^_~
Nope! Trump got the hell out. He legit thinks those words can trigger Armageddon>>5596I had no idea it was that bad
>>5597Just you wait ^\\_/^
K, I'm out for the night, thanks for everything, its been a blast!
[1d20 = 7]
>Not using borax based attacks on the queen
Do you even exterminate.
Sorry passed out last night, but I should be good for tonight
Roll to detect any type of magical items in the cave
Oh there's LOTS. Don't feel bad about not being able to play, though technically it is your fault Thez had to speak Blasphemy, as a well placed "Dispel Magic" would have removed the Queen's shield and allowed the party to gang-rape-kill her. No worries though, a wall of force does not block sonic attacks, and like I indicated, Thez wasn't going to leave without her record contract.
The contract doesn't do anything mind you, but it represents her most glowing achievement in the last reset, where she rolled a 20 on her performance check (which, when added to her perform ability, acrobatics, magical embellishments, and such came out to like a 48). It is because of that contract and performance that a good 1/3 of the piles of riches are even there.
Now for some clarification and explanation.
Thez does not think Starlight Glimmer is best pone, but in the infernal realms (where Blasphemy was first molded and crafted), the general perception is that she is. There are entire levels in the Abyss dedicated to Starlight Glimmer, so while Thez doesn't care either way, she does know Blasphemy (and has the infernal nature to make it work).
The teleport lock on the treasury didn't actually belong to the Queen, it is more of a security measure to make sure that no one poofs in and starts jacking shit. Now that the treasury is reclaimed, one can readily go to and from with ease. Atop the treasury up a winding staircase is an expansive fighting ring, designed to train, practice, spar, and whatever. There are holodeck proportions to it so players can practices spells, techniques, strategy, etc. on pseudo-enemies, but usually players use this area to beat eachother about the face and torso.
Down a similar set of stairs from the Treasury, the ordinarily somewhat translucent glass of the tower blackens and takes on a matte-texture. This leads to the Forge (which, btw, is where Lenos is). FOr the record, forging shit is Lenos' favorite thing, and the one thing that he (with exception) will do essentially for free just cuz.
The outside of the building is enspelled to allow one to walk across its surface as though wearing gravity boots or some shit,... just don't jump.
And, because the guy who designed the building - brilliant though he was - was a little off in the head, there is no actual door connecting the upper level and the lower level, one instead has to walk outside the door in the middle (formerly the section of tunnel that connected to the ant hive) and up to the pinnacle where the dais is. The dais was originally the magic user section of the building.
Don't worry, I'm gonna do up the associated maps.
And SPEAKING of maps, since the building is flying now, I'm also going to finish the world map. The building isn't THAT fast, but it allows you to be at Port Barry, or that place to the south, or any adjacent area in a matter of minutes (as opposed to hours by foot, or a half hour by mount).
The treasury consists of about 30,000 ounces of gold and assorted other precious metals (platinum, silver, copper, bronze, brass, titanium, adamantite, cold iron, etc. etc.), including some golden-steel (sourced from a particular type of enemy that I can personally guarantee will show up at some point) that appears to be giant armor (not of a giant mind you). There's also an assortment of gems very much like that Rarity gem-finding episode. Incidentally, the next time the party sees Thez, her 'outfit' will be much more over-the-top opulent, fashioned to almost look like a pair of jester's tights. with shiny mirrored plates accenting various spots, which themselves look like windows through which you can see cherry-blossoms shifting lazily in the wind, but for now she's still curled up around her contract sleeping most soundly.
As for magic items there are:
A Rod of Cancellation
A Rod of Metamagic - Silent Spell
A Scroll of Water Breathing
A Ring of Improved Jumping
A 30' length of Rope of Entaglement (Hang Yourself!)
2 Golden-Steel Masterwork Bastard swords
1 Golden-Steel Rapier
1 Golden-Steel Orcish Double-Axe
and 1 Golden-Steel Greatsword that's way too big for anyone to use, but also looks like its missing something (technically finished, but technically not).
The Golden-steel weapons are all masterwork, but currently non-magical (they'd been crafted but not enchanted at the time of the reset).
What is a rod of cancellation?
I will take that Rapier and ring of jumping too
Its a 14" rod of graphite appearance that when used (deliberately) will cancel out any magical item of non-artifact status (so it won't work on Vandereim for example).
The ring grants +10 to jump checks.
You're not proficient with rapiers (so -2 to attacks, but with the +1 its only a -1, and it can easily be further augmented).
Only 1x use on the rod tho, it breaks when the magic is expended.
>>5606>Thez wants to take a significant number of gems so she can look even more like a ghetto queen
Ah hell no! Every Gem and bar of metal with high exchange value goes towards the missionary effort
Trump proceeds to gather items of value
Lets assume you can stop her for a moment, or that much of it wasn't hers to begin with. Hypothetically speaking.
Where do you plan to store it? We're talking piles here, and an ounce of metal = 4 bits. Meaning, there's about 120000 shekels present.
Furthermore, she doesn't need large gems, she prefers the tiny ones (it gives that sequin-look). Larger gems poke and chafe anyway.
Why the treasury in Port Barry (now the property of the Universal Church of Football), of course!>>5613
I don't think you understand just how insanely ambitious Trump's plan is
Thats fine,... I still think you're gonna fail though, especially considering that when you guys finally end up at the city where the record contract was signed she can rake in 1k a show without rolling a skill check (and increasingly more if she does) as long as she can change her costume,... but sure knock yourself out. ^_^
Do not mention the Shrek style references again
Shrek? I don't follow.
>>5609I'm assuming by META-magic you mean summoning 20 sided die to kill enemys, correct me if wrong
I'll take the Meta magic (3 staff limit)
Do any metals or gems have magical properties in D&D? Cause I have no idea
They can, but no one has ever bothered to try yet and I haven't been want to give away juicy bits like that. None of the gems are magical at the moment.
The meta-magic ROD allows the user to cast 3 spells per day silently (either if silenced or if wanting to be sneaky).
Actually, I should clarify. Titanium (Mythril, sorry I said it wrong, but titanium is mythril in D&D) and Adamantite have particular properties. Adamantite is heavier than steel, but twice as hard (which means damage reduction for armor, or negating damage reduction for weapons). Mythril is lighter than steel, and slightly harder (minimal damage reduction, or minimal reduction negation, but vastly less cumbersome. Think frodo's shirt in LOTR).
Well since I think time is still playing in-universe, Trump has instructed Lenos to take the pyramid to Port Barry, as well as to look out for any Eldridge Abominations summoned by the bait earlier, where he has begun the process of turning Port Barry into the source of man power for later operations. His first act is to contract a stadium-cathedral, besides recruit townsfolk to transfer wealth from the pyramid to the vault of Port Barry
Oh shit, I'm taking the staff.
I'll take some adamantite and cold iron bars.
BTW, Adamantite is depleted uranium (no, you don't get radded by using it)
You do realize that you don't have to take it, its called a Treasury cuz thats where you keep resources so they don't wander off until the next time you need them,....
I mean, you're welcome to do so,... but bars of metal aren't light, and don't carry well. I'm saying you could be in the Mages area and be like "I wanna make a bla-blah" and I'll be like "Sure, you grab it from the treasury and get to crafting"
We're doing so much more with all of this than just a few staffs. We're creating an entire military-industrial-complex
Okay, that's an idea Thez would actually be down for, and upon hearing that she'll be okay with not having a new wardrobe (she will borrow stuff for concerts tho).
No worries, this isn't the first time I've had this discussion. ^_~
Glad to hear>>5626
I like this Idea
There are two goals that guide our actions - to kill the Terrasque, and to convert this planet's inhabitants to the one true Football. Though at first these may seem to be disparate and separate goals, the latter actually feeds into the former, as clerical knowledge gained, and the power of devoted followers, can be weaponized for use against the Terrasqu, and Elway is more likely to let us prevail if we first spread His word. But besides the religious aspect, we also need to create seige weapons, or draft an army, for use against our many opponents. To these seperate ends, we must build a stadium - to worship and train the common folk in Football; establish a monastic order - to be missionaries travelling the planet, to teach peasants in the arts (including the art of turning adamantium into ammunition), and perhaps even to fight in our battles; improve the resources of the current forge - so that it may be able to create the Trebuchets (can we make cannons?) that can slay larger foes; and create a headquarters for the peasantry to organize much of this on their own. Remember that Port Barry is, above all, a port. It can import laborers, skilled and unskilled, any materials necessary, and export missionaries
I'm totally digging where your head is at right now. ^_^
Oh and yes, the forge is sufficient to develop seige engines, trebuchets, ballistae, etc.
Why make anything else
Ballistae do WAY more damage, but with less range.
Trumpaladin's first stage is to use his perception to judge the most pure and worthy of the unconverted peasants. These, he converts with his showing of Superbowl XXXII and Elway's Helicopter tackle. these shall become his first monks and establish the monastic order of Mile High. This monstatic order will have several functions. Most will begin the missionary process of converting the entire population of Port Barry to Football. Some will assume the role of educators at the Port Barry Parochial School, which may need to be constructed. They shall train the citizenry in every essential art. And some will board the next ship out to far off lands to spread the word of Football>>5635>>5634>>5633>Ballistae
This would be an insanely useful tool. Essentially a giant crossbow, having three or so of these with teams, and with Adamantium tipped bolts, would be able to fell - or at least damage - larger and stronger opponents
Also, cannons have better range than ballistae tho less then trebuchet, do comparable damage to a trebuchet, but also have significant damage reduction-negation (with the potential of using explosive rounds ^_~)
Okay, what you're describing, I have only 2 comments.
1st, it will take time, I mean you're not going to immediately convert a bunch of people in a few minutes, it might take a day or so, then time to train, etc. As for the feasibility and quality of the idea, i have only one thing to say, which is my second point:
No matter, he has time. Assuming the treasury is secured - and that is the most important step, because he really will need that 120,000 shekels as the down payment for this program - Trump starts a public function - a rally, if you will - where he gives a speech about everything his group has accomplished thus far, and how they will bring jobs, jobs, jobs to the lower class citizens of Port Barry when the manufacturing of weapons begins. But while speaking about how he will make Port Barry Safe gain, Work Again, and Great Again, he mentions Football.
The purpose of this rally is two fold - to instill trust for the group in the citizens of Port Barry, but more importantly, to look for those six or so people who will approach him to talk about football. They, he will convert. And they in turn shall become monks, who will hep find other monks
Can a ballistae launch a 90kg projectile 300m with a counterweight?
Have no fear. Once we begin tithing - admittedly a little ways down the road - we'll have the funds to create all of the siege weapons
>>5642Is a panzerkampfwagen a seige engine?
Also question for the GM, can my staff of trans-mutilation revert thing to a past point
like cooked meat to raw meat, rust into iron, or unbake a cake?
I'll be back tonight, about 5pm est
And I wont forget music
Dude, with that idea you're going to get more than six people. I'm just sayin'.>>5641
No, a trebuchet is clearly the staple option for war machines. Having said, a well-rounded operation would include all 3 mentioned as well as others.>>5643
Yes, but no. The thing is, 'transmutation' is just a name. Its ability to transmute outside objects (polymorph) has been expended. I should/will call it something less grandiose in the future, as the name is a little misleading.
Copy that, I'll have some new bread by then. Take it easy.
Also a note about panzerkampfwagen;
Given the technological sophistication of the time, the best you're going to be able to craft for now is a Da Vinci-style tank, though further development is limited only by ingenuity, crafting skill (Thez knows a guy) and the subsequent die rolls.
Those six are just to help start the process of finding the rest.>>5643
It may be wise to begin the construction of a library in Port Barry to contain magical knowledge
>>5648>1 post by this ID
Who is this newcomer?just kidding
Okay, so of those who are receptive, you're looking to form an ace-team. Very Trump of you, I get it. Also the library isn't a bad idea. While that is the purpose of the library in the tower, there is no harm in having more resources.
Incidentally, at this point only Lenos has actually read the manual, so the party is still kinda at his 'mercy'.
Also, I rate the stadium as only costing about 50,000 bits (equal to a standard castle), so you have more resources than you might expect, and that's without converting the gems into coin.
>tfw this thread doesn't appear on the overboard or homepage, so I missed discussion