Its about to get real. I'll leave out the descriptions, you know what it is.
Staff Edit: Thread themehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTsD2FjmLsw942 replies and 66 files omitted.
Infernius' turn. "We of Port Barry will not stand idly while you face this foe! Fight ON!" cries Sechs, the stadium ringed by armed civilians who are not so civilian anymore.
>>18683Uhm oick one
>>18685Oh go cry me a river
More of the Port citizens appear from in and around the playing field, flanking and striking at the Dog. No one (except the one guy) land a successful blow, but there are many who have taken up arms.
The battle is joined. It is not just the party now, but the people with them.
>>18686i cure crit wounds on tracy can i hand her some grenades?
[1d4+3 = 7]>>18690Yes. That many
>>18693A band, from somewhere in the periphery begins to play. Bard songs are augmented.
Norfilly, your move. Through buffs, u can sing Inspire Heroics
[1d20 = 14]
Tracy speeds through the dog again and drops off another grenade in the lung as she passes through (Idk how a grenade misses while it's already inside the lung, but roll)
>>18695Its a matter of timing. It takes a 20 to unphase and rephase while depositing a grenade. Besides, its not your turn yet.
>>18684Not sure how that applies,... btw
>>18696I figured she didn't need to unphase, because the grenade would lose the affect as soon as it stopped touching her, but whatever...
>>18694I was going to ask if I could do do "Prestidigitation" even if it isn't in my available spells and create an origami pony... But I'll sing.
>>18697>Tracy
[1d20 = 4]>>18698Fair point, but still, the timing is ridiculous to determine. Its not 1 to 1 proportions. I'm still thinking it requires a 20 to land properly.
PSSST, you'd have better luck trying to toss it in the Dog's mouth!Thez> Kyuken
>>18699>so sing Inspire Heroics
The Dog lurches to the side, struck internally, and without defense.
>>18703
She's a big girl
Trump/Dog move, followed by Troll, Tracy, Tay, and Torcuil.
Troll> She's fighting it from the inside!
[3d20 = 16]>>18707Trumpa attacks dog. Modifiers, if the filly's last turn did not buff them further, are +28/+23/+18
Damage modifier is 1d10+18, unless Filly added more
Slash Slash Slash the bastard
>>18712Hush. You've gotten bad dice rolls too
[6d20 = 71]>>18710Ewww, that 1 should void other attacks, but given the circumstances, I'll let it be a miss. 2 hits.
D> Full round attack
Bigly Trump and the Dog exchange a wicked series of hits
>>18713His are usually funny though
>>18715Uh... I get like a 45 AC right? 42 if no new buffs from Tay and the Filly?
Is Thez still getting crushed inside that thing's stomach?
[2d10+16 = 28]
[4d8+17 = 23]
dice too long
[20d1 = 20]>>18717You mean like this?
[3d8+8 = 24]
[2d12+16 = 23]
still going
>>18722>thinking his ironic 1's won't count
[40d20 = 398]
K, sorry. Browser crashed again.
After taking the full range of blows from the T, Trump is at about 30% health, but lands several nasty blows of his own. The T (sorry D) is at about 40% health.
Troll casts Cure Serious Wounds
Tracy, then Tay, then Torcuil, Fae, Infernius, and Norfilly
FIRE!!!
>>18726>GM.exe has stopped working
>>18727What is my health after the serious wounds?
Um, Tay? If you would help heal what Troll cannot...
>>18727Throws all the grenades in it's mouth.
>>18727Uh, what kinda roll is that?
Its fuggin Cortana! I keep telling it to die, and it keeps coming back to life! Its like the fuggin dog!
>>18734That's Port Barry launching volleys of arrows.
>>18735This is why I didn't upgrade to windows 10
>>18736Ah
>>18737this was a smart move
>that windows 8 life
[4d20 = 28]>>18733You can't throw them all, but I'll let u double-
fisthoof (so 4)
>>18740And possibly also me, given the proximity
[3d6 = 12]>>18737Didn't have a choice
so gearing up for a Linux machine>>18737One grenade blows up at your feet, and the rest bounce off around the mouth, 2 doing damage (but not much)
The damage is minimal, and only cuz I'm making the fight play out. As I said, its essentially done, but no fast-forward this time (cuz reasons)
Tay, Torcuil, Fae, Infernius, Norfilly
>finally found an offical 3.5e spellbookI hate everything
>>18738>windows 7
[3d8+10 = 27]>>18744I heal trump
>>18749We'll need that to
keep it dead.
>>18746>>18747>>18748Kek
>>18749You're using THAT for THAT? RLY? I'll let you rethink that, cuz you'll fuggin NEED it e_O
[1d20 = 7]>>18754Don't worry, its in the bag.
>>18748[thankful nightmare noises]
>>18755GM, what is my health level?
>>18757i tried it didnt work.
[3d20 = 38][10d6 = 23]>>18757K
>>1875834hp
Fae attacks(?)
>>18757Where does it say thsat is available to wizards? I see cleric
>>18762yes
>>18763I can cast cleric and mage
Infernius is healing?, (choose spell)
Norfilly is adorable and should probably inspire determination (not an ability, GM insert)
Trump is less destroyed (~ 1/2 hp)
>>18702Sorry I missed this, but I'll make up for it. Basically, Song of Determination means auto-strike for next attack
>>18768>>18769Did the tarrasque do 70% damage on me in a single round?
>>18766>was that a fucking undertale reference?
[1d20 = 5]
I was going to stretch it out further, but we're at the verge of the end, so I wanna finish it tonight.
Thez> KYU... cough KEN
>>18770it does alot of damage.
[5d8+35 = 61]>>18770In a word, yes.
>>18771Nope, never played it
The Dog slumps over. Its still alive, but its hurting BAD.
>>18775Throw Javelin in its mouth.
[1d20 = 6]>>18778Forgot to roll
Sorry I was away for a little moment..
Is there anything I missed?
>>18775If I can take the "heal serious wounds as a free action, then do that, and
Slash, Slash, Slash with Vanderiem
If not,then Blue suede the fuck out of harm's way and drink from flask
>>18782Shush now, that was enough, everyone had auto-hit cuz Norfilly song. Cinematic time!!!
>>18786See
>>18785 since I think it's my turn. I think
>>18786I want to be Tracy to be inside its body as it dies and eat her way out like a maggot.
>>18790*joins Thez and starts slashing the walls with koraks sword*
>>18791>implying I need a reason
The Terrasque, the scourge of ALL dimensions and planes and living things, roars, and thrashes about aimlessly, before falling to the ground in a heap. Its body covered outside and inside with dozens of wounds, its life is depleted (all friggin 858 hp) and for the moment, is down.
Torcuil, this is your cue
>>18792Since its down, you can readily warp inside. Inside, you find Thez unconscious, and not breathing.
>>18792>koraks swordWhy do I keep saying that?
Tracy's sword.
>>18792It's just kind of gratuitous
>>18787Can we make doggo our friend and adopt it?
>>18794>is vulnerableTracy does the right thing and gently drags Thez out of the beast so she can have the monsters innards to herself.
>>18800Did the Port Barry NPCs do the actual death blow?
>>18801*begins eating the walls*
>>18798NO
>>18793Eish to keep it dead
[3d8+15 = 29]>>18794REEEEE I WONT LOOSE HER AGAIN
>>18802No, that was definitely Tracy. Citizens were out of range of song. Besides, it feeds into the whole "Assassin's guild" agenda.
>>18798"Someone cover her eyes!" can be heard from inside the beasts body
>>18807With a javelin throw? But her round wasn't until much later.
Eh, whatever
>>18798>>18808Eyes coverd tracy
*is still eating the creature from the inside out*
>>18805Torcuil's spell begins to take effect. Bands of magic weave their way around the corpse of the Terrasque, sparkling and fractally spiralling around. As this happens, Infernius leaps forward and prys its mouth open, to find Tracy dragging Thez, unconscious from its gullet. As all escape the body, the bands tighten and clinch around the body sealing and condensing the body of the fiendish creature, into something like an egg-shape. The last of magic winds its self about one section of the remaining carapace, about 2-hands in length, with the purest of white lacing on one side.
>>18814"Huh"
Whats the loot?
>>18815"our lives"
what is the loot though gm?
Wisps of magic drift off of it continually, and though its form remains sealed within, the Terrasque is no more, reformed and reshaped. It rests on the 50 yard line, sparkling and solemn.
>>18813>thumbnail looked more eyecovering
>>18814>all my meat is disappearingREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
*salvages tissue sample before leaving the corpse*
>>18820Please don't resurrect that thing
>>18817*contemplates eating football*
>>18815>>18816Sorry, Kefka was FAR to vain to use items, and the Dog had no use or ability TO use. There IS the emperor's throne, but that's another segment ENTIRELY
>>18822*Contemplates Smiting Tracy*
>>18819>>18817"Are you kidding me?"
>>18825Don't worry, I'm not hardly done. This will be a lengthy cinematic.
>>18816"Well I know that."
>>18818>Torc picks up pony"wanna go collect sticks?"
>>18823Oh, okay
>>18823Oh don't worry. The fact that he ruled over many kingdoms and exacted tribute was not lost on me. I would never overlook such a fact
>>18825"Hell no we ain't!"
>>18823*Kefka's body vanishes*
The stands around the party erupt in cheers. Not only has Port Barry - and Football - been saved yet again, but this time the citizens themselves took part. No longer was it the party saving the people, but the people serving and aiding the party, who saved everyone.
Oh right, I forgot about the copy-pasta and Kefka's death. Fuggin' Cortana! This will suffice (I was gonna plagiarize most of it, I'll fill in the blanks later)
https://youtu.be/Niulhs8ErCA
>>18831Citizens need not sell themselves so short. They held the demons at bay for hours until the party arrived
>>18832A mighty nation indeed. Great Potential. Great.
Unfortunately, during the fight and the involved circumstances, no one landed the requisite spot check.
A cackling voice resounds all around, throughout, and above the stadium. It is a voice that is familiar to most, but sinister to all. As the laughter resounds, all inevitably look up, to see a (largely) familiar face, circled by a legion of fiendish creatures.
"Its been a long time, but again we meet!" (I'm paraphrasing, cuz he stutters ALOT)
(still cinematic, don't worry)
"It seems that troublesome sprite bit off more than she could chew! This means, this realm is MINE for the taking! Go then my MINIONS!!"
A tornado of (((rats))) and demons, and foul creatures of all manner and variety spill forth from a portal directly over the tower.
NO
Like a weave of force, all motion is stalled.
>>18837>weave of forceShit, the black girls are attacking
>>18838"Did we win? Can I have the other half of the candy?"
Soros alone can still move, and he's sweating.
"That voice, THIS is not YOUR domain!"
THIS PLACE IS NEITHER YOURS NOR MINE. BOTH THEN HAVE EQUAL STANCE HERE, AND BOTH HAVE EQUAL AUTHORITY.
"Then it is a fight that you want, come then, SHOW yourself! GAH!" Soros is blown back by a second wave of force.
As this happens, a slender golden female with alabaster eyes appears near Infernius and Tracy.
THIS STUBBORN FOOL. I FORBADE HER TO BREAK THE LAW, AND HERE SHE DEFIES ME. AGAIN, AND AGAIN. AND WHY? FOR YOU (looking at/through Tracy) AND ESPECIALLY YOU (Infernius feels like he's been picked apart cell by cell)? THIS CANNOT BE, AND I WILL NOT STAND FOR IT.
>>18817>yfw you left a broom closet's worth of knives inside of the Tarrasque
>>18841(they were junk anyway, if you used them to attack, I would have rolled to see if they were -1 to -3)
>>18842Tracy still hurts though...
The golden female looks down at Thez, still not breathing.
THIS IS MINE. NO. THIS WAS MINE. IT IS MINE NO LONGER. (to Infernius) MORTAL. I COMMANDED HER TO OBEY THE LAW, AND TWICE HAS SHE DISOBEYED ME. ANSWER ME WHY.
>>18845because fuck you!!
>>18843(what did I say about making things and resources!? You can make a mountain of KEEN knives, if you'd just ask the right questions!)
>>18840*mouth waters at the sight of Soros*
[hungry nightmare noises]
>>18843>signs a little hymn for the lost knifes
>>18840Did Tracy fuck everything up?
>>18849Awww
>>18839Not Yet little one
>>18846Her eyes narrow. She turns her gaze on Tracy, then on Trump, and Torcuil, and Norfilly, and on Tay. Her eyes linger on Tay for a moment.
AND WHAT OF THE REST OF YOU. WHAT ARE YOU, WHAT DO YOU OFFER, FOR WHAT REASON AND BY WHAT MEANS CAN SHE DEFY MY COMMANDS?
>>18846>>18845wait this is soros talking to me right?
>>18851Soros is bad man. He is basically stealing my candy.
>>18852disreguard gm im sorry i thought it was soros talking
>>18839"Shhh! you know what"
Torc tucks the pony into his robes so she can see, but not have to be held
"Listen, you can have candy when this is over"
>>18849Artist?"Okay you can sing"
>>18852[mouth-watering intensifies]
>>18853No, this is the golden female. Don't worry, that was an excellent answer
>>18852"I am he who fights on behalf of my nations for their protection, prosperity, and glory"
>>18852"Um exuse me for the harsh language,"
>plugs ponys ears"Who the fuck are you?"
>>18857Trumpaladin looks over at Tracy
"Tracy? Tracy? Can you hear me?"
He waves his hand to try to snap Tracy out of her Trance
>>18863I thought we couldn't move?
>>18864I missed that. He only looks over at her, and tries to see if or how she responds then
>>18859She reaches out a hand, and trump is struck by a bolt of energy, rendered immobile.
FOOL
>>18861Another bolt, immobile
INSOLENCE
>>18862Yet another bolt
YOU I SHALL SAVE FOR LAST
>>18864Initially that was for Soros and crew, but as now 3 of the party are disabled. You still have motion
>>18865She's staring at Soros: she wants the rest of him.
(think Gozer from Ghostbusters, except sleek and golden, instead of bubbly and weird)
>>18866"look here bitch if you no let me go me rip you limb from limb"
>>18870Good spirit, but ur immobilized
Tracy, Tay, and Norfilly are still free to move/respond
>>18872Coup de grace soros with my 44.
>>18874Promptly Run over to him and start gnawing on his leg, ripping big chunks out.
>>18875>>18876I totally did NOT see that coming, but its PERFECTLY within grounds! OMFG that was gorgeous!
Okay. As Soros, hurled back and unable to resist "her" force of will and influence, stands immobilized, Tracy and Tay both let him have it. Tracy takes off a leg, and Tay blows his friggin head off.
The golden female's eyes narrow again, but curiously rather than aggressively. She looks back upon Tay and Tracy.
YOUR NAMES. I DEMAND THEM.
>>18866Trumpaladin is oddly content with this outcome
BURN HER, BURN HER
>>18872>filly is okayOkay
>>18877Kek
>>18877"Lady taylor the swift, conquer of worlds."
>>18878Oh, I've spent all week cooking this shit up. I alluded to it in the emo-wall-text
>>18877*munch* "It's.." *munch* "Tracy!"
*looks back momentarily*
"Tracy Cage."
*continues eating Demon, moving up his torso and pulling out his intestines*
>>18881The mage? That speech? That speech was more appropriate and harder hitting than I think
you even understand
>>18882"Hey save me the heart!!"
>>18884>Save the best partlol no
>>18885"Dont make me hurt you tracy"