/mlpol/ - My Little Politics

I wish for filly to pee in my mouth.

Sober… I would want to be a human male in Equestria.

Drunk off my ass?
A filly, eager for new life experiences.

>>113179
I think it would be kinda weird and maybe uncomfortable at first to give up being human, but I'd definitely want to become a pony if I could. Not so sure on the gender swap thing. Easy mode, or what I'm more familiar with?

>>113179
why not both?
filly by day, anon by night

>>113179
>wanting something other than to be the little filly
you need to fix those wrong opinions

Filly thread!
http://boards.4chan.org/mlp/thread/31818830

>>113195
If only I had the power to execute people (/mlp/, hugbox, and EQD mods)

First for new content!

>be Twilight
>you've just agreed to manipulate Anonymous into giving up whatever he knows about humanity's weapons capabilities
>this is probably the best time then to give Celestia all the information you've gathered about him, then
"I suppose if this is what we're doing, I might as well give you all the data I've collected about him."
>you reach into your saddlebag and pull out a few papers, pictures, and other miscellaneous items pertaining to Anonymous's arrival
>Celestia is clearly impressed by the level of dedication you've put in to understanding him
>she isn't one to be put off by a stack of papers, though
>as she flips through each document you've put together, you can see her face change through a series of expressions
>surprise, doubt, confusion and interest are among them
>"Do you mind if I ask some questions about this information?"
>you don't mind being asked, you just don't have many answers
"Go ahead, but don't expect a solid answer."
>"How did he first react to coming here?"
>that one's easy
"He was half asleep, and so he didn't have much of one aside from being forced awake by hitting the floor."
>Celestia gives a laugh at the last bit, but resumes a more serious face
>"Alright, how did he first react to being in a different universe when he regained consciousness?"
>this one's also pretty easy to answer, but it's not as sure as the first one
"It appeared to take him a few seconds to realize that he wasn't in the same place or the same body as before, but he was taking it well up until I told him that there wasn't a guarantee of him being able to get home."
>"And how did he react to that?"
>this one still hurts for you to think about
"He… He didn't take it well, and started crying."
>Celestia shows a bit of pity, now knowing Anon's feelings toward his situation
>"Now I understand your promise to him a bit better. There's just two more things I'd like to ask, and then you're free to look for anything that might help you both, or simply go."
>only two more questions
>you must've been able to collect more data than you thought
>either that, or Celestia's managed to figure out some things that you haven't from it
>knowing both of your track records, it could be either
"Alright, shoot."
>"You mentioned Anonymous having a stuffed animal in his possession resembling Aryanne, as well as knowing your name before a formal introduction. Has he given any explanation for either?"
>this is one of the questions that still confuses you
>the worst part is, Anon hasn't given you an answer yet
>that may be partly your fault though, since you never brought it back up
>stupid purple, quit giving yourself problems!
"He hasn't, and I have no way to explain it. I can tell you that it's just as weird as you think it is, though. The stuffed animal doesn't just resemble Aryanne either, it's nearly identical. It even has the proper cutie mark!"
>This stuns Celestia, and judging by the length of her silence, she's also remembering something
>she soon regains her focus and gives you some insight to her thoughts just then
>"Aryanne. She was a proud mare with impressive ideas, and an impressive army to back them up. I remember the day Germaneigh first declared independence like it was yesterday, and I can remember every detail of Aryanne's face as she told me to go fuck myself in this very room."
>such strong language, no wonder it was one of the more violent wars Equestria's ever had
>but, that's politics
>no wonder Celestia's not a fan of it
>"Her ideas worked, though. Germaneigh is still standing and has become a strong nation in its own right. I may not like her, but I would be lying if I said I didn't respect her."
>again, politics
>all this is making you nervous about the day where the crown is passed to you
>you'd rather just keep doing science and going on adventures with your friends
>but this is all distracting from the point at hand
"What was your last question?"
>Celestia's jolted out of her memories by your statement
>"I'm sorry, did I get sidetracked? Anyway, I was just going to ask you about those magical items needed to repeat this procedure."
>you reach into your saddlebag again to pull out a list of materials and procedures for the experiment
"Here's a full explanation of the materials used, the spells cast, and how it was all done."
>Celestia begins to flip through this stack of papers as well
>it's not provoking the same reactions, though
>she just nods every so often
>she finishes looking through the document soon enough, and gives it back
>"Alright, I'll start looking for the items listed tomorrow. It may take some time, but I know that there should be no reason I can't get them."
>that's a load off
>you weren't sure how you managed to collect fire from an Elder Dragon anyway, and you sure didn't want to try it again
>that wasn't even the worst thing you had to find, though
>that title belongs to a shard of Mirror Crystal
>you're not sure how much of the Crystal Tundra you had to search before finding a single cherry pit sized piece
>you would've liked to find more to make the reaction more stable, but spending a month looking for that was long enough
"Thank you for helping me out with this, I'm sure Anon will be happy to hear about it!"
>you gather all your things back up and go to find anon

>>113203

>be Anon
>you've been sitting here for a while
>does nopony even care?
>is anyone even gonna come in here?
>you're getting hungry again, too
>shit
>and there's no Twilight to get you food either
>guess you should check that thing that looks like a fridge
>you get up and walk over to it
>the handle's pretty high up, but you still manage to reach it
>at least you're not too vertically challenged
>after a solid pull, the door is open
>it actually is a fridge!
>but how do they keep it cold?
>probably more magic
>who supplies all the magic to run this stuff?
>you decide not to think about this since you probably wouldn't know anyways
>time to see if there's anything in here you could eat
>nope, that's claimed
>that is too
>heh, this guy's last name is "Thruster"!
>is all this food claimed?
>as a matter of fact, it is
>rip
>you'll just have to wait it out, since you're not a thief
>maybe you should check the cabinets too
>these aren't as tall as the fridge
>you open one of the cabinets with ease
>it's nothing you can eat
>mainly cleaning supplies
>and no, you're not drinking bleach
>yet
>no, not ever
>you're not enough of a bitch to off yourself
>a search of the other cabinets reveal more things that you can't eat
>one of them does have a deck of cards, though
>might as well play some solitaire
>you play a few rounds of solitaire (mostly losing) before you realize that you have another problem besides hunger
>you have to use the bathroom
>this may be more of a problem than the hunger
>what's worse is that you have no idea where the bathroom is
>you're going to have to venture back into the castle
>this is gonna suck
>you make your way back out, no longer caring if guards find you
>at least they'll know where the bathroom is
>you eventually make your way back to where you ditched the guards, but this doesn't help either
>wait
>you see Twilight!
"Twilight, over here!"
>she turns towards you and starts trotting over
>"There you are, I've been looking for you for a while!"
"I'm sorry about sneaking off and doing my own thing, but we've got more important issues. If I don't get to a bathroom in about a minute, I'm going to end up peeing on the floor."
>she understood your urgency, good
>"Hold on, I'll teleport us there."
>thank you!
>wait, us?
>doesn't matter, urge to pee is reaching critical levels
>as soon as the purple flash is gone from your eyes, you immediately run to the toilet
>doesn't matter that purple's in here with you
>wait, why is she here with you?
>at least she's not looking at you while you're here
>that would make her a pedo
>and weird
"Hey Twilight, why did you come in here with me?"
>"Because it's a big castle, and I'm not going to lose you again inside it."
>that's a valid point
>"Also, we're going to stop by the castle's library before we go, and I know you don't know the way there."
>another valid point
>you finish going to the bathroom and wash your hooves
>Twilight then teleports you two to the library

>>113195
>>113197
Thread was axed by triggered mod/jani

I seriously do not get this shit - it really has to be assholes in charge of the board.

>>113206
Is it really worth going back anymore? The board has gone to such absolute shit since filly was banned. That's not saying there's a correlation, but it went down the drain pretty fucking fast.

was posted in the thread

>be anonfilly
>miss home and shitposting
>another anonfilly hands you a valentines card with malformed edges, likely due to her improficiency with hoof scissors
>front of the card has a cute message inviting you to open and read her emotionally laid-bare heart posted inside
>hoof one corner and open it slowly
>the inside contains a poem

Fillies are green,
Bullis are mean,
If you boop me I'll scream,
You are a faget

>the rest of the inside of the card is blank, save for a few bold, ruby words
>(USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)

>>113207
At this point, I just fantasize shooting people in the head.

>>113210
Bummer, guy. Valentine's can be hard on all of us fucking turbo nerds. Don't worry, Anon. If you were a cute little filly, I'd make sure that your Valenbirthday was the best day of your year. You'd never be forgotten or unloved as long as I was there. But you're not, so lol.

>>113210
Would a birthday reply on the 14th help, Anon?

I do not think I will update today, even though it's a new thread and I will need to do my recap + pastebin update soonish. Sickness has taken me and I need more rest.

>>113214
Your boyfriend's name is Sickness? ^:)

>sighs
Banned again for green filly posting.
Didn't violate any rule.

I have a problem with the idea I have for a story. The story plays out like this:

>Anon is a horsefucker. He has seen all episodes several times. A true autist
>Anon is transported by something else but Twilight
>Anon is turned into a filly
>Anonfilly is in ponyville on the night of nightmare moon's return
>On the surprise party for Twilight Anonfilly slips up and says something like, "Oh, Pinkie Pie, I understand why you will become the element of laughter"
>At the time, Twilight disregard it as anonfilly stumbling on her words when she was actually meant to say something like, "Pinkie, you bring laughter
>Later she thinks back at this and thinks it is suspect

Now what I want to do is go from this set up to a hunt were Anon is the one fleeing Twilight, who is the one hunting him. So I can come upo with a reason for why Twilight would be intersted in Anon but i can't come up with a good motive for why Anon would run.

The motives I have come up with feels… in lack of a better word bad.

Motives:

1.Anon fears he will be a guine pig for experiments. Except he has seen the whole serie and should be fairly certain that they wouldn't do something like that to him. One could allways argue that he would flee out of fear but again why is he afraid. i guess it might work I don't know.

2.Anon has read to many crazy, abusive mother-Twilight that he believes that that will happened. But what kind of autist would… oh

And there is also the fact that Anon should know that his best chances of coming back to hisworld is either by whatever he came into it by or by the ponies' magic.

So the story has no direct moral it is just entertainment value and for practice that I might write it. It is pretty much demi-god hunting small child across the continent

Do you got any ideas?

tsk, I forgot my picture>>113221

>>113204
Creepy Twilight being creepy. Does she honestly think Anon would escape down the toilet?

>>113221
Something should happen where Anon believes Twilight will act out of character to his detriment. If you're going for a comedic route, then he messed something up big-time and hears an enraged Twilight scream, "I'M GOING TO SEND WHOMEVER DID THIS TO TARTARUS!" If you're going a more serious route, he either discovers too late that he's been a pawn of one of Twilight's enemies and must get away before blame is fixated on him, or he sees Twilight do something out-of-character that permanently shatters his perception of her.

Also, to Silver Spoon, before you write your update you should consider that Anon would be horrified at the realization he is technically a pedophile (given his intimate relations with your namesake at the start of the greentext). It would be entertaining if you played this mentality any way you please. I don't know how Silver Spoon would regard it but I'm sure she would have a unique observation now that they've been transmogrified.

>>113221
Sounds very entertaining; definitely would read.
I'd say Anon should live happily with Purple, but always with a hint of suspicion. Then, he misconstrues something Twilight said and/or did, which, combined with the greens he's read,induces him to run away from home. Cue 'The Fugitive'-esque escape/hunt drama.

>>113206
>>113207
/mlp/ would be infinitely better if it had this site's mods instead of the fag mods it currently has

>>113212
>spoiler
>>113213
it's ok, anon. just offering is good enough.

>>113298
If I'm being completely honest though, I'd miss using images like these, but that's a good thing.

>>113204
It's still kind of weird. She could have waited outside.

>tfw you can barely use the restroom when there is anyone else nearby

I was reminded about Akinator and wondered if he could guess Anonfilly. Apparently he can, pic related.

If you want to try: http://en.akinator.com/

>>113304
Eh. I know what it's like to be left in the dust with a birthday holiday. The thing is I'll probably only remember Valentines because of your birthday.

>>113320
No shit, akinator can guess anything, the only thing i ever stumped him on was Frisket from ReBoot

>>113321
>I know what it's like to be left in the dust with a birthday holiday.
damn, what'd you get stuck with?

>>113304
Aww, come on, bud. I was just playing. I'll more than likely be around on Valentine's to wish you a good one and keep you company anyway. We don't forget about our own here.

I'm still not gonna fuck ya though, no matter how many sad fillies you post. You're gonna have to figure out the 'loved' bit on your own.

>>113338
>You're gonna have to figure out the 'loved' bit on your own.
all id want is a hug though
>>113339
damn, now my shitty day doesn't even compare

>>113345
Luckily for both of us, it isn't a competition.

But yeah, as a young lad, I learned to never expect much when my Birthday came around. Except for disappointment. And maybe a card.

What does filly know about medicine?

>>113349
i was always told that everyone was celebrating my birthday, and not the actual holiday. of course i found that wasn't the case pretty quick. i think after my parents left me for the 3rd time to enjoy the day, i stopped expecting things too.

>>113352
well, i know cpr and some things about medication, but i doubt that'd come in handy where there's magic and no medication

>>113355
It's even easier to tell with a Birthmas. All of the gifts are wrapped in Christmas wrapping and put under the tree, just like they were normal gifts.

Since we're talking about shitty birthdays, my mother's birthday is 9/11

>>113361
I imagine that celebration is particularly lively.

>>113360
fuck, i could imagine. i hate how people react when they hear about it, like being fucked over every year is something magical.
>>113361
well, at least nobody will ever forget it :^)

>>113363
You, Anon, truly understand.

>>113361
hey, that's my birthday too!

>no "despair, but also a kek" pic
why

TWILIGHT, I WANT MOMMY MILKIES!

>>113412
REEE all you want, you're not getting anything from me. I have a book to read.

>>113416
Babby doesn't like being bottlefed. She demands it straight from the tap.

>>113428
and judging by your mastery of the english language, you aren't a babby. now go get it from the fridge like a filly without some horrific disability.

>>113429
wow rood
filly should be nice to babby

>>113433
Can confirm, I only wrote the babby post (obviously not referring to myself) and am just confused now.

i could die happy if i was just able to make an anonfilly smile

>>113439
>step 1 draw filly
>step 2 draw filly a smile
>step 3 you made the filly smile
then you have my permission to die

>>113443
Why do we still not have an anonsperm edit of pic related?

>>113445
give me a few minutes in MSpaint and I can have it done

>>113445
So does that still make Anon gay? Fertilizing an egg is like the most heterosexual thing you can possibly do.

>>113446
While you're in MSpaint, maybe you could remove the bottom text and add some lines of text for anonsperm

>>113441
oh, so ive already done it
time to kill myself then

>>113429
What if babby could still talk relatively normal?

>Be filly
>Pushing babby in stroller
>Some mare comes over to look at her
>"Aww, what a cute baby!"
>"Kill yourself, faggot."
>Pure horror on the mare's face as she slowly walks away
>You and babby burst out in laughter as you continue on

>>113453
Babby is right filly is a fucking faggot.

>>113448
done and done, but it's still MSpaint so it's still shit.

>>113455
that's pretty alright for 10 or so minutes in MSpaint

>anonsperm doesn't know he's going to continue to experience everything along with anonegg once they become anonfetus

>>113458
something doesn't add up there. What happens to anonsperm's consciousness when they merge into anonfetus? does it just play a backseat role to anonegg, or do they fuse into a new anonmind? For that matter, what happens if the anonfilly they grow into is changed back into a human through magic? do they split back up into two separate anons, or is it like a fusion from DBZ and they stay like that forever?

>>113455
>MSpaint and not Krita
>Not even fucking GIMP

>>113448
But the bottom text is the funniest one!

>>113453
Imagine the possibilities. Switching between talking and gurgling depending on the people in the room to make one person insane.
You get to tell others exactly what you want, and can still cry incessantly until you get it.

>>113458
>>113459
At a certain age around puberty, Anonfilly is cockvored, and Anoncolt is unborn. Within a week or so Twilight is inevitably impregnated by said stallion/hermMare. When the two are combined, they 'share' the body for a bit, but soon the egg splits into twins, with the former filly becoming the colt and vice-versa.
>Neither foal has ever made it past 14
>And ofc Twilight knows exactly what's happening
>Isn't even trying to cure/prevent it

>>113461
what the fuck, man.

>>113462
It all started with https://desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/31157600/#31196428, and it was built upon over the next two or three threads after

Happy filly.

>>113466
That's a very cute filly

>>113466
I love happy filly so much. Happy filly is best filly.
>ywn make filly happy

There, that should just about cover every stupid reaction post for this picture. It's all true though ;_;

>>113472
In some dimension far away filly wants to make you happy,anon.

Okay, time for a long overdue recap, and an update soon after.

Pastebin: https://pastebin.com/JReEqH6G

>You are Anon Filly, one of at least 5 humans who somehow woke up in Equestria in the body of a filly.
>It is 10 years before the return of Princess Luna, so many of the ponies you've come to know from the show are either fillies or not born yet.
>You woke up in Canterlot Castle, but were soon placed with Twilight and family as a temporary accommodation while Celestia tries to find your "real family" (who don't exist).
>While staying with Twilight, some crazy shit has happened.
>Her mother, Twilight Velvet, was replaced by a changeling shortly before your arrival in Equestria.
>Fortunately, you were able to report her to Celestia without losing too much.
>If you can call losing a patch of fur on your face and a few hours of memory from your first day "not too much", that is.
>In the process, you earned your cutie mark - a question mark, which reveals that your special talent is telling the future.
>You get random glimpses into the future that you cannot explain.
>You even managed to use this to find the location of the real Twilight Velvet.
>She is now crashed on the couch, injured and frail from nearly a week without food.
>Further, you will all be needing to leave Canterlot tomorrow for Ponyville, as there has been a hit placed on the family by the changelings.

>>113494
rerolling for my last suggestion since new thread, but ask if she needs anything and get it if she does.
[ 1d100 = 54 ]

well i was hoping i'd remember more but i didn't, so all i remember from my dream was my father and uncle as fillies, and for whatever reason they were inside a new closet inside my middle school
they were talking about some guy, and i remember my dad saying he hated him, then my uncle started teasing him and saying that he liked him
then my dad was blushing and shit, telling him it was bullshit and the guy was gay

i don't even know anymore.

>>113500
whut

but thanks for reminding me, I think I had a dream last night where I was the filly. All I remember was that I was a lot shorter, and also that I'm pretty sure some loser wanted to >rape me. Other than that, it was a pretty normal dream.

>>113503
>also that I'm pretty sure some loser wanted to >rape me
No I didn't!

>>113503
>be Anon
>not even a filly, just dreaming about it
>already thinking of guys a losers
Holy shit, there is really no hope for us, is there?

>>113504
>trying to insert yourself into my dream
Alright then, where was it and who was I with?

>>113503
>>113504
It isn't >rape if you want it to happen!

>>113505
nah, I just remember thinking he was a loser from the place he worked.

>>113507
but I actually didn't. I was having other dream fun until that guy showed up.

>>113506
You were in a public bathroom. With me.

>>113510
no, I was at an arcade with a friend!

>>113510
>ywn do filly in the public bathroom
why live

>>113511
But arcades have bathrooms, don't they?
Not even joking I work at an arcade. spoopy.

>>113513
fug! maybe I DID call you a loser!

"You don't look so well. Can I get you anything?"

<<"Food would be nice."

Oh, right. You said she hadn't eaten in six and a half days. Why did you have to be right about everything?

"Anything in specific?"

<<"Do you know how to make pancakes?"

You do, in fact, know how to make pancakes. In fact, before your crappy Value Village job, you had a crappy job as a cook in a diner. That is until the place went bankrupt. Only problem is you don't know how to cook with hooves. In fact, you barely know how to eat right in this body without looking like a total pig.

"I can absolutely make pancakes."

Fuck it, you're doing it live. You head into the kitchen and grab out the ingredients. Mixing everything together isn't too difficult with hooves and a mouth, nor is even getting the ingredients into the pan. Flipping the pancake though, that was the tricky part. You don't have the mouth dexterity to use the spatula with your mouth, so you'd need to use your hooves. Only problem is that leaves nothing to hold the pan in place. With a little quick thinking, you come up with an interesting solution which involves wrapping a hoof around the handle and using it to grab one part of the spatula, while you turn with the other half. Success! After a little while more, you decide the pancake is finished and let it slide out of the pan onto the plate.

From behind, you can hear Shining Armor giggling to himself.

>>"You have never used a frying pan in your life, have you?"

>>113517
"No. I've always used a griddle." [ 1d100 = 14 ]
Gotta save face, yo.

>>113517
Continue making pancakes "Giggle louder, shirly." [ 1d100 = 41 ]

>>113517

"It worked, didn't it?"
[ 1d100 = 64 ]

>>113513
>>113515
>you meet your filly/anon match in your dreams, so that it's not so weird when you finally meet

holy shit

>>113517
>can't pull the trigger
Brainlet.
Stick and/or rod through trigger guard, push.

>>113523
But Anon, we're all fillies here!

>>113515
Y-you don't still think he's a loser, do you anon?

>>113525
What shitty excuse of a Regex expression does this site have for quotes?

>>113526
he will remain a loser in my mind until he proves otherwise to me.

>>113526
>>113529
I work at an arcade for $10.10 an hour. I am a loser.

>>113530
okay, now I just feel sorry for you. I hope you can get a better job, or a raise at some point.

#KillAllFillies

>>113532
so that means you should kill yourself

>>113531
I'm gonna start looking for a new job at the end of the semester.

>>113534
I hope you get one, then maybe you won't have to be the loser creeping on me in my dreams.

>>113535
>Transparency checkerboard background
kys

>>113537
yet, anon
yet

>113523
What was in this deleted post?

>>113542
nothing important

>>113543
but as long as I don't know, I don't have context for this post >>113525!

>>113555
>>113525
Why the fuck did that not work?

>>113541
well, it was
only lasted 7 posts

>>113556
obviously because of the exclamation mark

>>113555
it didn't work because of the exclamation point, and I guess I'll tell you since you gave a reason to know. I replied to the wrong poster giving a statement about implications of homosexuality and that anon who was in my dream for whatever reason.

>>113558
>>113559
Well of course it has something to do with the exclamation point, but why did that cause it to not work?

>>113559
I don't believe you.

>>113561
believe me or don't, I'm only the guy that made that post.

>>113563
No, I made that post you lying son of a bitch.

>>113564
prove it

You prove it. I accused you first.

>>113566
it read

>implying I'm gay
>implying I'd be gay for you
>mfw

and had this picture attached

>>113568
That's not what it was. You are trying to lie everyone in this thread and you think you can get away with it too all because that post was deleted.

>>113569
prove that I am, show me what you think the post was.

>>113570
I am not autistic enough to remember my own shitposts. Are you?

>>113571
as a matter of fact, I am.

>>113560
Shitty Regex. Better regex:
>(?<!&#62;)&#62;&#62;(?!&#62;)([0-9]+) for >>1234
>&#62;&#62;&#62;&#47;([a-zA-Z0-9_]+)&#47;([0-9]+) for >>>/mlpol/1234
>&#62;&#62;&#62;&#47;([a-zA-Z0-9_]+)&#47;(?![0-9]) for >>>/mlpol/

>>113574
why, thank you! it's not every day that somebody recognizes my genius.

Now I'm even more confused…

>>113576
what has you confused?

>>113576
I bet I'm more confused than you are.

>>113579
nuh-uh!
I bet I'm more confused than you are, faggot!

More content for you fine faggots, I hope it's not hot garbage!

>the library is just as boring as you expected
>Nothing but big dusty books about things that don’t interest you
>except for a book about physics, that actually looks pretty interesting
>well, it did until you looked inside of it
>it’s not much that you haven’t already learned
>these ponies must not pay very much attention to the sciences that humans do
>after giving almost every book a cursory glance, you go find Twilight
>she’s over at a table with some particularly big and dusty book
>she doesn’t seem to be paying too much attention to you, this book must be pretty interesting
>luckily, it’s pretty easy for you to see the cover from the way she’s holding it
>Theoretical and Applied Magic at a Master Level
>Volume III
>how many of those are there?
>at least 3, apparently
>if only you had some paper, you could continue writing down what’s happened
>but where would you find blank paper in a library?
>if anypony would know, it’s Twilight
“Hey Twilight, do you know where I could find some paper?”
>she looks up from this book with a confused look
>”Why do you need paper?”
>you try to think of a valid excuse
>nope, none
>the truth it is!
“I’m writing down everything that happens to me here.”
>this makes her a bit suspicious
>”Who are you writing this down for?”
“Myself, mainly. I certainly don’t think anyone back home would believe I was here of all places.”
>she puts down the book and gives her full attention to you
>”What do you mean by ‘here of all places’?”
>oh boy
>you’ve gone too far
>Twilight’s probably not going to let it go this time, either
>but you have to try to avoid the question
“A-again, it’s a long story. The paper, please?”
>Twilight gets up, now with a different look on her face
“Good thing you’ll have plenty of time to tell me when we’re back at home.”
>rip
>your attempt didn’t work this time
>guess you now have to figure out the easiest way to tell her that he entire life’s a work of fiction
>this won’t end well
>at least she went to go look for paper
>shit, you don't have a pencil either
>and you're still hungry
>why are you so bad at managing priorities
>well, at least Twilight grabbed you a pencil while getting paper
>now, where were you?
>oh right, about where Spike and you got lost
>you go back to writing down what's been happening
>you get to the start of your first day of school when Twilight finishes checking the book she has
>"Well, I've found nothing in here that helps me at all. Are you hungry, too?"
>food?
>it seems you don't need to ask about food either!
"Yeah, I'm pretty hungry. Where are we going?"
>"There's a few good places nearby, anything you want in particular?"
>you don't really care what it is at this point, you just want food
"I'm not sure, what do you think?"
>she thinks for a second
>"You can never really go wrong with pizza, how does that sound?"
>pizza sounds great
"Sure, let's go get some pizza!"

>>113583

>just under 20 minutes later, you two are seated in a pizza parlor
>you're looking at the menu, and having a hard time choosing toppings
>no matter how hard you look, there are still no options for pepperoni or bacon
>yet there's still pineapple
>stupid vegans have no taste
>you decide to vocalize your complaints to Twilight
"What does a filly have to do to get some meat around here?"
>"What did you expect? Ponies don't eat that stuff, we aren't built for it."
>that still doesn't answer your question
>oh well
>when the waiter comes, you decide on cheese pizza
>Twilight gets pineapple on hers
>why though?
"What is wrong with you?"
>"Says the filly who only got cheese on hers."
"Cheese pizza is a last resort for when there's nothing good to choose from. You WILLINGLY chose pineapple!"
>"Pineapple's not that bad, you know."
>you see through her lies
>you've tried it, it's pretty nasty
"Maybe to you, it isn't. All of us sane individuals will just keep our quality pizza to ourselves and away from you."
>Twilight's starting to look somewhat amused
>can she handle banter?
>"I can prove how it's better than what you would've chosen."
>bullshit
"Alright, prove it."
>she gets one of the smuggest grins you've ever seen and leans in close
>"Judging by your reaction, pineapple is also a topping where you come from. Given that you had to order cheese, that means what you like isn't available here. There is enough of a demand for pineapple that it's served in two universes, while yours is only in one."
>statistically backed banter
>there are so many things wrong with that argument, but it's obviously just shitposting
>so you respond the best way you know how in this situation
"Shut up…"
>she just leans back and laughs
>stupid purple, go eat a pineapple!
>while you're being butthurt, the pizza comes
>it's pretty decently sized too
>not forgetting your manners, you thank the waiter before digging in
>you may not be some filthy pedo, but this cheese pizza isn't bad
>maybe it's just your hunger, though
>either way, you manage to power down the whole thing in about 7 minutes
>Twilight certainly looks surprised
>she hasn't even finished half of hers
>"I guess you enjoyed your basic cheese pizza."
"More than you're enjoying your garbage pineapple one, if that's how we're judging it."
>that exchange makes you both laugh
>fuck, you could get used to this!
>you'd seen greentexts about Twilight being an absolute cunt
>about her being a manipulative psychopath
>even just an overprotective mother, sometimes
>never did you see one where she was just… friendly
>it's still not where you wanted to be less than a week ago, but still
>this isn't half bad
>Twilight finishes the rest of her pizza and pays the bill, freeing the two of you to go and do some sightseeing
>well, Twilight has already been to a lot of these locations, so she's mainly showing you around
>some cool sights
>some other cool monuments
>kinda reminds you of a family trip to Washington DC
>you all toured the entire city, seeing all the cool sights
>except when it came to going to museums, then everybody split up and looked at what they wanted to see
>you being the nerd that you are went to the natural history museum and the aerospace museum
>other members of your family went to the art museum, and still others went to the national history museum
>afterwards, you all met back up for dinner
>it was a nice trip, but it was also back when you were clueless to the corruption present in that city
>still though, you and your family had fun and that's all that mattered
>you two finish up this tour of Canterlot outside the castle, watching as Luna raised the moon
>that's a solid way to end any day

>>113585

>be Luna
>you just finished raising the moon
>apparently Twilight had visited today
>friggin Tia, never tells you anything
>worse, she tries to push paperwork on to you
>it was this kind of shit that made you turn into Nightmare Moon
>you've got enough to look after yourself without her giving you her excess
>it's not easy keeping track of every pony on the national watch list
>no, not even when you're being paid to sleep
>that's a lot of ponies to make sure aren't getting into shit
>a couple hundred of them, if memory serves
>you still haven't found Starlight Glimmer yet though, that's beginning to worry you
>wasn't she supposed to be with Twilight?
>oh well, maybe she ran off and got herself killed in the Everfree or something
>you remember back when the royal castle was there
>it sucked, some wild animal got inside almost every other day
>at least you still had that massive system of secret passages and slides
>Tia didn't have any of that installed in this castle
>buzzkill
>speaking of Head Princess Sunbutt, here she comes
>"Luna, I have a question."
"We may have an answer."
>her face changes to very mild contempt
>you know she hates it when you use the royal we with her
>"Anyway, I was wondering what it would take to send a pony to the moon. Twilight brought that up during the meeting today, and you're the only one I can think of that might have an answer."
>how did this come up?
>in what conversation does a trip to the moon ever come up?
>well, besides that one time
>and that other time
>but no other times!
>this is actually a pretty good question though
>you think for as long as you can, remembering everything about your time spent on the moon that you can
>and you reach your answer
"Technically, it would be possible. It would take an absurd amount of time and energy to get there though, and that's not even considering what it would take to keep the pony alive once they got there."
>her face changes to surprise and confusion
>"Keeping the pony alive?"
"Space is a vacuum, and the moon is very far away. In fact, it's so far away that every other planet in this solar system could fit in between it and this planet. The pony would be dead in minutes with no protection from that environment, and the trip there would probably last for multiple days."
>Tia's trying to keep the horror off of her face at that description
>she's not doing a good job of it
>"That… That is good to know."
>luckily you didn't have to deal with any of that dying part
>immortality has its perks
>it was still pretty terrible though
>throwing rocks into orbit was fun until you ran out of rocks
>you did manage to make a pretty neat castle out of the dust, though
>of course, you had to turn it into glass before you could actually make a really big one though
>oh hey, Tia left!
>now you can get back to what you were doing before
>the question is, which one of the guards managed to max out the high score three times on the Pac-Mare machine?

>>113582
Faggot, unlike you I was [i]born[i] confused, having no idea what is going on. Life is still one large riddle I am failing to figure out.

>>113587
you did the italics wrong

>>113588
Blatant lies. They are exactly how I want them.

>>113591
is that just part of the ruse?

>>113592
It is a ruse within a ruse. You will never guess what my next ruse will be.

>>113595
trying to confuse me

>>113339
Join the club pal.
I've just pretty much given up celebrating all together at this several years ago.
Birthoween


It's a shitty feeling

>>113597
Damn. That's pretty bad. Now all we need is an April Fools Birthday to round out the shitty birthdays.

>>113604
this entire site's birthday is april fools, remember?

>>113606
This

>>113586
Excellent work as always.

"It worked, didn't it?"

>>"Well yeah, the pancake came out fine, but your technique is horrible. You could have burned your hooves easily."

Little bitch. He can complain about your technique when he has to serve 30 senior citizens who decided to all come in for a pancake breakfast at the same time. You were a pro.

>>"Let me show you how it's done."

"…Fine."

He puts another pad of butter in the pan and adds more batter in. When the pancake is ready to be flipped, he bites onto the spatula and rotates it with his teeth, never moving his neck.

"How did you get so good moving it with your teeth? Aren't you a unicorn?"

>>"Well we're not born masters of telekinesis. Aren't you an Earth pony though? This shouldn't be hard…"

>>113611
>sweating intensifies
N-no U!

>>113611
I was gonna say something about being a clumsy motherfucker, but I like >>113615 better. [ 1d100 = 65 ]

>>113611
"My powers are of the mind and soul! I typically do not bother with such mundane tasks."
[ 1d100 = 29 ]

>>113611
I'm also child, not actually often I get loose on a stove. Only since the boating accident I had to learn.
[ 1d100 = 85 ]

>>113640
I'm loving these comics more and more!

>Twilight has LGBT flags
>Disgust intensifies

>>113660
Yeah, I don't know why, but its triggering me for some reason. Especially the whole (Magic forcing them to stand next to each other stuff). I'm not sure why. Have i become overprotective of the filly?

>>113663
It's a strange feel for sure. I just want to protect the filly.

>>113664
That's Twilight's job. You just go to work and forget about the filly, okay Anon?

>>113667
>forget about the filly
Impossible. We need to protect that smile at all costs

>>113668
>ywn protect another filly's smile
>swn get confused when you smile as she does
>swn call you a faggot for caring about it
>swn secretly enjoy that you always go out of your way to make her smile
>swn smile more often, but also call you a faggot more as the days go by
why live

>>113670
If you insist on me being a faggot then I might as well- pic related

she is not a morning filly

>cuddle filly every day
>wake up one morning
>slowly picks her head up from your chest and looks at you, eyelashes fluttering behind her messy mane
>oh my god
"what the fuck"
>"…what?"
>you can only stare at her while your tired mind starts up
"there are fucking hearts in your eyes"
>"what?"
>she pauses
>"WHAT?!"
>lazily pull your phone out and switch the camera
>"OH MY FUCK, WHAT THE FUCK?"
>she just stares at her reflection on the screen
>"OH GOD, I'M A FUCKING FAGGOT."
>glares at you
>"YOU FUCKING BITCH AND YOUR CUDDLES, YOU MADE ME A FUCKING FAGGOT!"
>glances at the phone again, staring at herself
>you take a picture
>"AH, DELET THIS, GET RID OF THAT SHIT! YOU FUCKING NIGGER!"
>she spends a few minutes pounding her soft marshmallow hooves on your chest while you laugh
>what a way to start a friday

>>113720
Kek, that's cute.

>>113720
great stuff Anon, I had a hearty kek

>>113720
D'aww, haha.

>>113720
Funny and adorable.

>>111508 →
Here is another instalment of my awful green. Decided to post every 2500 - 3000 characters rather than sit on it otherwise it will never get posted

>Be Anon
>You have just woken up in your room at the Friendship Castle™
>Looks like you magically didn't transport yourself back to Earth
>You decide to mill about and see if Purple will eventually come to collect you
>Figure there is no use leaving your room just to get lost inside the castle
>Opening the wooden blinds you cast your gaze across Ponyville
>Sun is shining and there is already ponies going about their day
>It's pretty idyllic, definitely better than what you remember the suburbs of Earth was like
>At least you can remember that much
>The only memories you seem to have lost are about you specifically
>Continuing to take it all in you start to think you could get used to this
>Almost
>Even in this peaceful town it isn't home to you
>You are a human after all, not some brightly coloured horse
>A knock at the door snaps you out of your pondering
>"Anon? Are you awake? Breakfast is ready if you want to join us"
>You are pretty hungry considering you only managed to have some fruit yesterday
"Don't worry I'm awake, have been a little while actually"
>Opening the door you see Twilight is already making her way down the hall
>"We are eating in the map room, just follow me"
>You oblige and follow her down the hall
>The map room is pretty big with a large circular table at the centre surrounded by six large crystalline chairs, and one smaller one
>There seems to be the bottom half of a tree hanging from the ceiling, roots and all
>Looking back down you notice each of the larger chairs is adorned with symbols at the top, one you recognise as Twilights ass tattoo
"Personalised chairs huh? You go all out"
>"I didn't request them to be fair, they came with the castle"
>Weird
"If you say so your highness"
>This elicits a scrunched up face from Twilight
>God that's cute
>"I'd prefer it if you just called me Twilight, I never really asked for this title"
"Oh?"
>"It's a long story for another time. Please, sit where you like"
"No one is going to be mad I am taking their seat are they?"
>"No pony will mind, the girls are not joining me for breakfast today"
>Moving around you decide to plant your ass on the one 3 red apples inscribed on it
>Figure you might as well sit next to Twilight, assuming she will be sitting at the place which effectively has her name on it
>Sure enough she does, your a genius or something
>Before the conversation can even begin the main door flies open and something walks in with breakfast
>You cant really tell what it is carrying it though, the huge pile of pancakes being carried are obscuring your view

>>113756
>blue, pink, and white stripes as a background for "I wish to be the filly"
What did pixelcanvas mean by this?

>>113758
Ur a faget.

>>113756
>The pancakes arrive at the table to reveal the small lizard that was carrying them
>"Oh, you must be Anon. Glad to finally meet you. The whole town seems to talking about you"
>Well this is a disappointment, you were expecting a dragon to look a bit cooler
>"The name's Spike"
>You snap out of you daze to realise it has extended his claw out
>You take it and give it a firm shake which rattles the dragon somewhat
"Glad to meet you too"
>Releasing your grip the dragon goes to sit in the smaller chair next to Twilight after taking his share of the pancakes
>Twilight magics the rest between yourself and her and you all begin to eat
>Twilight breaks the silence that had fallen on the room
>"So Anon, I was hoping we could maybe talk about yourself some more once we are done"
>"Since your the first human to visit Equestria I'd like to get as much information as possible about yourself and where you came from"
>"It should also help us find a way to get you home"
"Sure, anything that'll help me get home. I am thankful for you letting me crash here but I can't stay forever"
>Breakfast is soon polished off by the three of you which prompts Spike to clear the aftermath and Twilight to magic a notebook and quill from somewhere
>"Shall we begin? Can you tell where you are from?
"Not exactly, my memories still seem to be fried on the specifics. It would be a place called Earth"
>Twilight continues the questions while taking notes
>"I notice you yourself don't have any magical ability, is it safe to assume all humans are incapable of using the magic on Earth?"
"Well yeah, because magic simply does not exist on Earth"
>This seems to have shocked Twilight considering her mouth is gaping at this revelation
>You will have to continue as she seems to be struggling to form any other words
"We don't need it. Humanity has gotten by on technology alone"
>You pull out your now dead mobile from your pocket figuring it would be a good place to start
"For example, this device here can be used to talk to other people with another one of these thousands of miles away"
"As well as send text messages by various means"
"It can also store hundreds, if not thousands, of books and songs"
"Unfortunately the battery has ran out of power and obviously Equestria doesn't have a means of charging it back up"
"Otherwise I could fire it up and show you some features that don't require the communication infrastructure"
>You pause to allow Twilight to take this all in and snap out staring at the black brick in your hand
>"What does it run on? We may be able to at least get it working"
"Electricity. Pretty much all modern human technology requires it"
"I guess it could be analogous to magic in Equestria, assuming magic is used here to power machines"
>This seems to have got pretty excited as she furiously takes notes down
>The conversation goes on for some time
>You cover subjects like human cities and various wonders like cars, planes, TV, the internet, etc.
>Surprisingly you find out the ponies do have trains, but they are all coal powered
>Seems Equestria is basically hundreds of years behind Earth in some respects
>Magic likely means the need for such advancements have been stunted
>Either way this nerd horse is lapping it all up
>She is way too into this
>"OK, I think that is enough for now. Do you mind if I take that device of yours for me to study?"
"If you want. It is useless to me without any charge. Even then I could only use what is already on there which is some music and books"
>The phone is quickly removed from your grasp by a purple aura
>"Thanks Anon, I will get it back to you in one piece"
>"I am going to go to the library and do some studying. I have an idea on where to start now on how to get you back to Earth"
"OK, don't work too hard"
>She better work hard, talking about Earth in such detail has made the longing to return pretty strong
>Twilight leaves the room staring intently at the smartphone you have just handed over, turning around as if to find some secret
>Twilight has one last comment before closing the door behind her
>"Oh, if you want why don't you ask Spike to show you around Ponyville? It'll be better than haunting around here"

Last update for tonight. Feedback would be appreciated.

>>113800
Nice.

>>113811
Also nice.

>>113800
>another anon showing off and talking about human tech
i dont think the fillies in these stories ever think about the repercussions of showing these things for twilight
if the pones were to ever get human tech, not only would they easily surpass the current tech given with the notes and theories of twiggles, but as a result of that would probably end up just as fucked as everyone else is here.

next thing you know, anon's a mare, there's corruption everywhere, and the power of money takes its spot in place of the magic of friendship

>>113811
B E G O N E T H O T

>>113849
filly is no thot
she just wants some lovin' from (You)

hey drawfags. any ideas of how to incorporate anonfilly into this comic? It's an old format, I know, sorry.

>>113850
but anon… if she breath, she a T H O T

>>113852
fuck you, i'm not a thot, YOU'RE a THOT

>>113851
I love how that meme was made years before the merge even happened.

"Have you forgotten that I'm a child? I only started cooking since the boating accident, and that's because I had to."

He puts the batter for a third pancake in the pan. Probably good thinking, since Velvet's gonna need all the nutrition she can get.

>>"Well, use your teeth to flip the spatula and you won't have to hold the pan wonky. You can do that, right?"

"I guess…"

Manipulating things with your teeth is something you're just going to have to get used to. You managed to get some barely passable mouthwriting back in school by writing rather slow and dragging your head along with the pencil, but anything more complex than that just feels weird.

After the pancake stack is about 4 high, Shining pulls out a bottle of pure maple syrup.

>>"Would you like to do the honors?"

"Sure…"

You drench the pancakes in enough syrup to help Mama Velvet regain her lost pounds, and add a nice pad of butter on top just for good measure. Afterwards, the two of you bring the plate out in front of Velvet, who is currently receiving a back massage from Purple.

<<"Oh thank you both, you're a couple of lifesavers."

She wraps you both in a warm, but weak embrace.

>>113854
I mean, that event was relatively not that long ago. Basically everything pony was made before then.

>>113856
Yeah, but it feels like it was just meant to be.

>>113855
I hope she likes them. [ 1d100 = 29 ]

Rolled 59
>>113855
Hug her back, free style. Maybe include spaghetti.

>>113855
>>113870
Hug her back; definitely include spaghetti

>>113811
Are you trying to seduce me?

>>113893
Are you threatening me master filly?

>>113852
But anon, you breathe. Are you a thot?

>>113898
Yarr, ye be threatening me master filly, lad?

>>113900
>using my shitty version
anon pls

>>113855
Get her also a tall glass of orange juice. [ 1d100 = 29 ]

>>113233
>>113237
I am really glad for your input. It helped a lot and I now have an idea on what to do. So thanks a bunch. I will write it today and post it as well but for you amaricans that is tomorrow since. It is 7.47 am here now. I will also finish the last story I wrote on the last Anonfilly thread.

>>113265
>>113352
Very cute.

>>113900
>>113901
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9r9s4PuIRk

>>113583
Not having filly continuously keep a pencil behind her ear for no reason.
>>111694 →
Noticed this thread has a considerable lack of sad applejack. Let me fix that for y'all.
>Pink horse really doesn't beat around the bush when it comes to cupcakes.
>You'd make a joke about the spectral coloration, but you're not that much of a faggot.
>A few minutes later, some party games are organized.
>Pin the tail on the pony, some tables set up with board games, (though one is noticeably absent.)
>You recieve even further confirmation that your shitty hand-eye coordination has carried over into your filly form, as you end up hitting the wall more than the pony.
>League outdoes you by a few dozen points, and your other friend doesn't participate.
>Yep, you've still got all of your chips on something to do with sports.
>After a few more rounds of root beer and cupcakes, you're completely stuffed.
>Twilight probably won't be happy when you're too full to suckle, but you can't let yourself worry about that now.
>The party guests eventually begin to leave.
>Most of them simply exit, but Sweetie comes over to you.
>"I'll see you… Clover."
"Yeah, seeya around."
>Eventually even Pinkie starts hinting to the fact that the reservation for the venue has almost expired.
>You thank her, taking a few of the bits from the stash with you, and exit into the afternoon.
>The party lasted longer than you thought it did.
>Time flies when you're having fun, you guess.
>You decide to lead your friend up to Sweet Apple Acres, making sure to stay on the trail.
>Don't want Best Pony to go Purple on your ass.
>The gate is open, and though you wouldn't expect a harvest in the dead of winter, it's eerily quiet, the wind whistling through the barren orchard.
>You breathe in the cold air, letting yourself go back to all of the winters you had back on Earth.
>You would usually get up early, shovel the snow off of your driveway, (you never went anywhere, but it became a habit.) and make a cup of hot chocolate.
>You reserved the latter for only the most frigid of days, otherwise you wouldn't enjoy it nearly as much.
>But you're here today for a reason.
>You grasp the knocker on the barn door firmly in your mouth, and give it a few strong swings.
>You hear shuffling inside, and something being grabbed.
>The door opens a crack, a shotgun barrel extending from it. "What in the hay-" the barrel lowers. "Oh, it's just fillies. Applebloom… isn't home right now." You hear a few sniffles in her voice.
>Dammit, you just want the Potassium Nitrate, you didn't ask for a sad horse.
"That isn't what I've come to inquire about. I figured you being a farmpony you might keep some Saltpeter around."
>"Saltpeter? What's a little filly like you inquirin' about saltpeter for?"
"I have bits to pay for it?"
>You hear a sigh.
>"Listen, ahm not in the mood to pass potentially dangerous chemicals along to little fillies. Give me a reasonable explanation, or git."
>This was going to be more difficult than you thought.
>Input action
The homebrew images are going to only be used when I feel they're important to the plot now, if at all. As I'm not a drawfag, and sketch.io is a pain to work in, I'd rather devote my time to the green. inb4 'you haven't been spending time on your green.' You're right, and I'm sorry.

you get to bring one game into horseland to play with filly, on any console of your choice. we'll say that hoers magics allows her to grab and use any controller normally.
what do you bring, and what game?
or will you just be a dick and take something single-player?

i'd take an xbox with left 4 dead 2

>>113913
"i was told by zecora that you could use it in mixtures, i wanted to try my hoof at potion making with it, like apple bloom!"
[ 1d100 = 74 ]

>>113914
>any console of your choice
A Laptop? I play games on it…

>>113916
so do i, but that's not a console nigga, the fact that you can plug controllers into it notwithstanding

>>113913
[ 1d100 = 22 ] I'm trying to get into chemistry/alchemy.