>Mixed Nuts
To some, its a delightful role-playing venture based (loosely) on 3.5e D&D rules. To others especially a particular german poster,... love you btw its the worst thing to happen to Mlpol (which is saying something, cuz there's,....).
>What it do
On weekends we engage a dynamic storyline based largely on the GM's capacity to create and illustrate the situation. Sometimes he's a faggot tho.
>What about me?
New players and shitposters are always welcome. We have prohibited excessive >lewd, but it does still happen, and non-players can assume casual roles as available (at the moment the world is a desolate wasteland tho so not for a bit). If wanting to play, make a post about it in thread and there's plenty of anons who can steer anon in the right direction.
At the moment the party is starting to appreciate that - from their future-jumped perspective - the worst has already happened. All that is left is the denouement, but at the same time there's still a glimmer of hope. Deep within the ruined city of Durpistan, where Thez has made a last vestige of resistance against the forces of George Soros, the party contemplates their next move.
977 replies and 35 files omitted.
K so as I'm seeing, Fae is first, followed by Snek, then Torc and Infernius at the same time, with Stix following, with Trump in last.
[3d20 = 46]>>63802Fae dives in towards the unholy abomination of central-European-style Socialism, and rips at it with Fang and Claw
[1d100 = 33]
That's at least 2 hits, with a possible 3rd (bab?)
>>63804She has the multiattack Feat, so it's something like 20/18/18 for the combined attack bonus, and +12 for highest base attack bonus. Possibly a couple points higher
[1d20+31 = 42]
[1d20+30 = 32]
>Torc and Snek next to each other
That's nice.
Snek aims his gun at let giant nosy merchant, and holds his action until Torc can cast True Strike.
Torc then casts a quickened True Strike, affecting him and Snek.
And for Torc's action, he forms a great beam of the purest coldness in Trumpaladin's heart, using it as a polar ray.
The polar ray has the +30, Snek had the +31
>>63805Yeah, I'll count it as 3, 1 of which does 2x damage
The creature retracts at the sudden onslaught
[1d20+7 = 11]
Rolling Initiative
>>63808Tracy goes with Stix, immediately after Torcuil and Infernius.
>>63809Tracy prepares to flank and finish off gigajew's leg
[2d8+2 = 13][17d6 = 62]>>63806I mean, it isn't a 1
Damages rolls (17d6 polar ray, 2d8+2 snek)
>>63806>The purest coldness in Trumpaladin's heartAnd just with saying that, +2d6 of cold damage. Careful not to get frostbite
>>63809I stand up. Pull out my holy symbol then cast Destruction on the giga juden.
[10d6 = 34]
No saved, but still the creature is weakened by an intense blast of jackboots and nationalism.
Tracy and Stix' turn, the former whom I assume is going to town on the increasingly injured foot?
[3d20 = 31]>>63817Tracy whips out Edgy and flanks the creatures leg, slashing viciously, intent on completely crippling the creature.
>>63819She's ditched the extra 5 AC from combat expertise now, and is just trying to fuck it up at her full attack bonus.
[3d20 = 30]>>63817Stix fires another three shots with Rapid Shot with his magical bow.
“Any ideas on how to stop this thing Trump”
[1d100 = 35]>>63821>1At the beginning of an attack combo, that's unfortunate
So Stix falls over. I understood him still being on Fae's back, if so he would be falling off at this point.
Did Tracy's slashing ruin it's leg yet?
>>63824No, its achilles tendon is larger in diameter than Tracy's body.
>>63825Did she damage the creature though?
[5d20 = 54]
In a Chanel of all his faith and fury, Trumpaladin brings down Vanderiem like a sharp and swift hammer, channeling all his faith and fury into the repeated slashes.
He utters the following short prayer:
"Elway, give me the strength to smite all those who seek to wipe hope from this land, and bring justice for what has befallen our Port and Sparintenar. Praise American"
Slash Slash Slash Smite Smite with two smite evils, feather fall, and Divine might on all attacks. With Eagle's splendor that is +8 damage on every hit that lands and one turn undead expended.
The bonuses should be 28/23/18/21/21 with smite evil adding the +8 to the last attack and the feather fall attack, and with Trumpaladin claiming the Weapon Focus feat. Smite evil does +17 damage
>>63827Fuck! I repeated myself in that paragraph
How much does she need to dig into this leg before it's crippled?
Sorry, the hold up was because it is Gigajew's turn before Trump's, but then I had to do something anyway
*lenos takes flight drom the roof od the keep and flies to the roof of the synagogue*
As Trump readies to wail on the massive creature of noses, and as Lenos and Kiynen arrive on the rooftop, the Gigajew holds its arms out wide, and each one of its eyes glow red
GJ>Jew Beam
Everyone inside the Synogogue roll a saving throw
[1d20+2 = 10]
[1d20 = 17]
Torc gets an extra +2 to all saves, so that one is his.
[1d20 = 4]
Stix save throw
[5d8 = 14]
K, everyone takes 5d8 damage
[5d8 = 25]
[5d8 = 16]
>sigh
Top is Snek
>Gulp
Bottom is Torcuil
Trump/Fae need to take damage, otherwise its a new round
[5d8 = 25]
[5d8 = 16]
Rolling
[1d100 = 19]
As everyone is stung by the crazy jew-beam, Trump dashes forward with Vandereim and strikes once, twice, a third time, before clasping the sword in both hands, delivering a devastating sever-strike, followed by yet another hit.
[1d100 = 72]
Max damage on sever, plus opponent rolls fumble
So the Gigajew is stumbling (flat-footed) until its next turn, and Trump gets an extra attack roll, on top of his previously uncalculated damage.
>>63852And with his latest attack,... by the way, you guys need to be more on it about calculating critical thresholds. A nat 20 rolls on the critical table, but the critical threshold (as in, improved critical, keen weapons, etc.) still get double damage dice. Thez for example, gets a 16+ critical threat. I say "you guys" cuz it occurs to me that I've totally neglected it in the past. Like,...
totally,...
Trump zips along the Gigajew, riding Fae solo after Stix fell off in an unfortunate dice roll. Weaving around reaching arms he strikes cleaving blow after cleaving blow, as Fae continually increases in height in an elevating spiral. Cresting to just over the full height of the creature, and not far from the top of the synogogue, Fae speeds into a dive, headed straight for the creature's face. As she dives, the creature attempts to swat at the pair, which is exactly what Fae had hoped would happen. Slicing once into the arm to disrupt its motion, Trump turns with his momentum and grips Vandereim in a devastating downward slice that severs the Gigajew's massive arm just at the upper bicep. With just a gesture and the energetic momentum Trump signals Fae back toward the monstrosity one final time. As they fly past, Trump digs Vandereim in the creature's chest right at the waistline and digs a canyon of ruined flesh across toward the opposite shoulder. In an absolute shower of jewish blood, the creature stumbles backward one step, and then two, finally falling at the apex of the temple, where it had formed in the first place.
>>63853"Praise Elway. Praise American."
[2d8+5 = 16]>>63853Torc and Snek make their way to Stix
"You okay lad?"
Torc also take the opportunity to use his wand of cure moderate wounds on Snek