That Bitch stares at Trump thoughtfully and appraisingly. At several moments she begins to speak, but then stops. Trump isn't sure if she's having difficulty formulating the words/response, or is unsure how to respond at all. At last, she appears to make some sort of mental connection, and her face brightens. She punches in her ID for a few moments, and turns back to Trump.
"You can have both," she says. "At first I was having trouble recalling this collection of knives, but then I remembered the meme that was shared," she says, holding up her ID to show them.
This thread continues the continuing RP thread that has been continuing - essentially every weekend (and much throughout the week) - and now continues. Playersfaggots are welcome to join, and shitposting/bantz - within reason - is open to faggots and spectators. It's D&D 3.5e+ rules (+ = whatever else we throw in), and since there's so many previous threads with far more effective OP descriptions I'll just get back to it.
Looking at the ID, Trump and Tracy can see a still image of a uniformed individual holding Tracy's Efficient Quiver, with a perplexed look on his face, facing the camera man. Pushing the screen, the image plays and displays the man slowly turning the quiver over and a broom closet full of assorted knives, daggers, kunai, and other assorted blades falls out onto the ground, along with a few pieces of ridiculously elaborate jewelry. As the last of the knives falls out on the floor in a pile about 8' around at the base and 3-1/2' tall, the uniformed man looks back at the camera and says, "What the fuck," before the video stops.
Did I mention that Trump is disguised as an Orangutan (a fashionable one named Clyde), and Tracy as a monster truck?
Meanwhile, Torcuil has been on an enjoyable impromptu date with Death, and has had a delightful time of it all. She's much less intimidating in a hoodie and sweat pants,... and without the skull-face (which is really just a mask that goes with the cloak) she's a pretty down to earth chick,... who goes around and collects the souls of the dead vocationally. They walk together through town after a lovely meal, returning to Trump Tower.
Stix and Snek are likewise returning to the Tower, having located Stix' prized dagger from the previous encounter/scrimmage with Thez.
Elsewhere, an adorable filly adds more sticks to her bundle. A statue of Alex Jones sits in the tower, looking very sad. A Yak is busy putting the Gestapo and the Generals through some martial training drills. Thez however,....
[Read more] 1319 replies and 70 files omitted.
Okay first off, I'm going to use that first set of dice rolls as Trump's 'taking initiative' series of strikes.
[1d100 = 44]
[1d20 = 20]
Fae and Stix need to roll initiative, and Trump lands two strikes before
>>62915Uh.... Let's go with the one where he waited until the third attack before rolling a 1
[1d20+6 = 13]>>62916Fae. I think she gets +4 initiative at least
>>62917That's exactly what I meant
Unfortunately, while he hit with his first two strikes, that fumble results in Trump loosing his footing - and Vandereim - who spins about 10 feet away.
"Oh fug, I'm gonna be sick," the sword says as it clangs to the ground.
Alright. Order is:
Trump
Gaylord
Stix
Fae
[1d20 = 11]
Gaylord performs a ranged touch attack against Trump, casting a black ray of crackling negative energy.
Upon being struck by the beam - which does hit (no saving throw) - Trump feels noticeably weaker.
[1d20 = 19]>>62923Stix shoots the fag spirit
>>62924His shot lands squarely in the creature's chest. However, it doesn't seem the least bit affected by it (damage reduction). It does seem angrier however
[3d20 = 16]>>62926Fae charges the creature, pouncing him, and ripping at him with Fang and claw
>>62927>Another Nat1Alright, who has the saltwater?
[1d100 = 58]>>62927Fae gouges a chunk out of it with her teeth, and scores with one of her claws
... however she looses her footing and loses her initiative on the next round (initiative is temporarily 1)
Its now Trump's turn. He's prone, and Vandereim is 10 feet away, and he feels weaker than he did.
[4d20 = 37]>>62929Trumpaladin quickdraws Sugoito, and full round attacks with slashes
"You must die NOW
Trump can quick-draw Sugoito, and he can get up, but that's it for the round.
>>62934Can he cast "remove nagative levels" on self and get up?
>>62935Nope, standing takes a standard action, and spells can't be cast while prone
>>62936Trumpaladin lets out a mighty "REEEEEEEEEEEEE" and stands up with sword drawn and aimed at Blasphemer
As Trump gets to his feet the creature hisses at him and drinks a potion, becoming immediately gaseous and insubstantial, but still visible and present.
[1d20-4 = 1]>>62938Stix uses Many Shot to shoot 2 arrows at this thing
>>62939Uh, I think you fucked up
[1d20 = 5]>>62939In case of manyshot, you would want to roll a 2d20, but since you already rolled one I'll do the other. Obviously, the first shot missed.
[10d20 = 88]
Okay that's it, dice test
Both of Stix' shots miss. Oh wait, the creature is gaseous. They would have missed anyway.
[3d20 = 21]>>62941Fae keeps up the pressure, biting the air and clawing at it
>>62945Fae's biting and clawing passes harmlessly through the creature
Trump's turn. The creature is gaseous and insubstantial, but still appears before him in its altered state, amused that such a simple effect seems to have completely neutered their ability to harm it.
>>62948Trumpaladin moves back and picks up Vanderiem
"Pony, reach into Fae's bag, and get out the orange Gatoraid"
>>62949As Trump retrieves his sword, the creature flies 10 feet up, laughing inaudibly.
>>62950“Ok.”
Stix goes to Fae and gets the Gatorade from the bag
Stix now possesses a flask of gatorade (holy water).
Fae's turn,... though I'm not sure what effect she could have at the moment
>>62954Fae falls back 10 feet to be next to Trumpaladin
With a Quick Action, Trumpaladin quick-mounts Fae, taking a 10 on a riding check, and holds his action/readies a full round attack for when the Blasphemer is in range
Gaylord, feeling quite self-satisfied and realizing that he doesn't need to kill Trump and co., that it is far better off simply alerting its allies to their presence, begins to fly away in retreat.
It would say something to this degree, but it can't speak in gaseous form.
>>62958In gaseous form, it moves at 10'/round. As far as movement speed, it is incapable of escaping, but It can keep the gaseous form for,... a while
[1d20 = 12]>>62959Stix throws holy Gatorade at the spirit
>>62961The flask passes harmlessly though it, because Stix neglected to open the flask.
I'm kidding
As the liquid strikes the creature, several affects occur. For one, the holy gatorade dispells the continuing effects of the gaseous form. In addition to that, the Gatorade burns the creature's skin like acid. It shrieks in sinister agony, as it falls to the ground.
[5d20 = 68][3d20 = 38]>>62962Now release the held attack
Fae: Pounce and rip at it with Tooth and Claw
Bite Claw claw
Trumpaladin:"I shall smite thee with my mighty sword!"
Slashes. Smite evil on the first two and Feather fall, because why not?
Smite smite slash slash slah
[1d100 = 76]
The creature is now proned, and,... ouch,... I don't think it made it after that