This thread continues the ongoing RP/Shitposting game. Its based on D&D 3.5e core rules with exceptions made for just about anything. Its essentially a play-by-shitpost RPG with structural additions. Games get hairy on Saturdays, but weekends in general; weekdays are for meta and shitposting.
Most pressing of the situations is that involving Infernius, Trump, and Tracy; the former finds himself being surrounded by robots, while flying robots seem to have cut off his escape. As nimble as Uatchit is, his situation doesn't look good. Trump has fled outside the Cardashil wall, and his pursuit disengaged to secure the perimeter of the city. In short, Cardashil is now a Panopticon. Meanwhile, Tracy - er, a praying mantis who is clearly identifiable as Frank (or any of 3 other identities) - is amongst a throng headed for the teleportation gates along the perimeter of the park area.
Oh yes, and those grenades. One of the robots has char marks and scraping on it.
Meanwhile Stix, Torcuil, Snek, and Thez are having an otherwise constructive conversation in the Tower.
/vx/ - Videogames and Paranormal
1113 replies and 97 files omitted.
'It seems like I'll need a better card I I wanna really get around this place..' Tracy thinks to herself, looking around briefly
File (): 8D8110740E0328863940E7B5869D1003-140231.jpg (136.9 KB, 500x656, image.jpeg)
File (): 607FAA59B38910B07616ADFBC2168EF7-1779097.gif (1.7 MB, 639x533, 1521207313289.gif)
>>60960
"Pony, that's not necessary. Just wait for someone to set the center stage on fire, and then the utility bots will be back. Ride or hijack one or take its clearance mechanism"
"Pony, that's not necessary. Just wait for someone to set the center stage on fire, and then the utility bots will be back. Ride or hijack one or take its clearance mechanism"
>>60963
You can make your own feels if you roleplay hard enough. It's not something that's given to you.
You can make your own feels if you roleplay hard enough. It's not something that's given to you.
>>60964
She didn't say that aloud
>wait for someone to set the center stage on fire
"When would that ever happen?"
tbqh desu senpai, I've been wanting to cut off That Bitches ass and hang it over the fireplace for quite a while now, but I figured now's not the time to kill her.
She didn't say that aloud
>wait for someone to set the center stage on fire
"When would that ever happen?"
tbqh desu senpai, I've been wanting to cut off That Bitches ass and hang it over the fireplace for quite a while now, but I figured now's not the time to kill her.
>>60966
>expecting me to carefully read and observe minutia on this shitty safari browser while mobile posting at a restaurant, when a post has quotation marks
"Well, I don't know. I just know we failed to follow the bots through last time"
>expecting me to carefully read and observe minutia on this shitty safari browser while mobile posting at a restaurant, when a post has quotation marks
"Well, I don't know. I just know we failed to follow the bots through last time"
>"so when can I go get my well done gnome dinner? I've heard gnomes are extra spicy and an explosion of flavor."
>>60966
>Spoiler
Kek
>>60966
>Spoiler
Kek
>>60966
I think you are vastly underestimating the difficulty of that. The only thing I can think of is have Trumpaladin distract her by talking about business or IRL shitposting or by seducing her. But I don't think that will get Tracy close enough to swipe the ID. Except maybe for seduction. That might get that bitch to leave her guards long enough for Tracy to sneak up unobserved
I think you are vastly underestimating the difficulty of that. The only thing I can think of is have Trumpaladin distract her by talking about business or IRL shitposting or by seducing her. But I don't think that will get Tracy close enough to swipe the ID. Except maybe for seduction. That might get that bitch to leave her guards long enough for Tracy to sneak up unobserved
File (): 881B1FC2537F7B6C2F1322424390C019-106824.jpg (104.3 KB, 750x600, YyRRcZH.jpg)
>>60969
I'm just bloodthirsty; don't mind me. I have literally no reason to, she just happens to be the nearest warm-blooded NPC.
I'm not going to kill her or any other NPCs (yet), but I'm in "looking for targets to assassinate and reasons to assassinate them" mode right now.
I'm just bloodthirsty; don't mind me. I have literally no reason to, she just happens to be the nearest warm-blooded NPC.
I'm not going to kill her or any other NPCs (yet), but I'm in "looking for targets to assassinate and reasons to assassinate them" mode right now.
"You said gibe feels. I said (essentially, not literally) 'which feels?',"
>>60970
I appreciate this post
>>60970
I appreciate this post
>>60975
"I don't know. Maybe we could ask the lady on the stage earlier very nicely to take us to the utilities. Maybe try to buy an advertising contract. Bitches love advertising contracts.
The Trump brand could do well here"
"I don't know. Maybe we could ask the lady on the stage earlier very nicely to take us to the utilities. Maybe try to buy an advertising contract. Bitches love advertising contracts.
The Trump brand could do well here"
File (): E594BA1C1D9CCAFE7E0DA13C0D2436AD-158866.jpg (155.1 KB, 900x577, 1365119218_384157377.jpg)
>>60977
I like high stakes feels, especially the feeling of raking-in a huge reward after taking an equally huge risk.
pic unrelated
I like high stakes feels, especially the feeling of raking-in a huge reward after taking an equally huge risk.
pic unrelated
>>60980
Can she change him into a professional looking businessman of pure seduction? Someone who, when he tells you he wants you to advertise a brand worth billions, and he can make Mexico pay for it, you believe him
Can she change him into a professional looking businessman of pure seduction? Someone who, when he tells you he wants you to advertise a brand worth billions, and he can make Mexico pay for it, you believe him
>>60982
Put it on. It's made for the purpose of greeting people.
It's named Hector btw (not sure if I mentioned that earlier).
Put it on. It's made for the purpose of greeting people.
It's named Hector btw (not sure if I mentioned that earlier).
>>60983
Alright, so you seem to want to acquire an extremely high level ID, and more to the point, want to fuck over That Bitch. I think that getting her alone is going to be obscenely difficult, that her security will be hard to get past. I also think that she herself is extremely high level. So you'll probably want to distract her. I think Brad could help in one of two possible ways:
1. Try to buy advertising for the AFL. Now That Bitch is extremely arrogant and dismissive. She's probably not going to be impressed by anything Tracy or Trumpaladin do. But entertainers survive off of branding and selling advertising. They are going to treat people who come to but adds more favorably than people who come to sell talents. If you want to try selling, Trumpaladin can sell an idea for a reality TV series
2. Seduction. Trumpaladin is really good at Fucking things, with 20 ranks in each of the two relevant skills. That Bitch is arrogant as fuck, but I'm betting she's a slut. This idea has the advantage that it would give her cause to be alone in a room with Trumpaladin, which Tracy could then break into and take the ID. She'd even take off her pants for it, so that makes it easier
Alright, so you seem to want to acquire an extremely high level ID, and more to the point, want to fuck over That Bitch. I think that getting her alone is going to be obscenely difficult, that her security will be hard to get past. I also think that she herself is extremely high level. So you'll probably want to distract her. I think Brad could help in one of two possible ways:
1. Try to buy advertising for the AFL. Now That Bitch is extremely arrogant and dismissive. She's probably not going to be impressed by anything Tracy or Trumpaladin do. But entertainers survive off of branding and selling advertising. They are going to treat people who come to but adds more favorably than people who come to sell talents. If you want to try selling, Trumpaladin can sell an idea for a reality TV series
2. Seduction. Trumpaladin is really good at Fucking things, with 20 ranks in each of the two relevant skills. That Bitch is arrogant as fuck, but I'm betting she's a slut. This idea has the advantage that it would give her cause to be alone in a room with Trumpaladin, which Tracy could then break into and take the ID. She'd even take off her pants for it, so that makes it easier
>>60992
>+16 Will
pass
Brad (aka Clyde) still looks like an orangutan, but he now looks like an orangutan so well-dressed and professional that anyone who met with him would forgive the fact, voiding any circumstantial penalty he would've taken.
>+16 Will
pass
Brad (aka Clyde) still looks like an orangutan, but he now looks like an orangutan so well-dressed and professional that anyone who met with him would forgive the fact, voiding any circumstantial penalty he would've taken.
Before doing anything charisma based, Trumpaladin casts Eagles Splendor on self and mount
>>60994
Oh come on. Let him look like a reality tv host billionaire sports league owner all around winner
Oh come on. Let him look like a reality tv host billionaire sports league owner all around winner
File (): 32F9B0424BBE5BD9CDCB63A18859A37A-823217.png (803.9 KB, 1265x997, 1521256535715.png)
>>60997
Well, the purpose is to get her to be willing to let them access the trash, or to steal her ID so they can access the trash
Well, the purpose is to get her to be willing to let them access the trash, or to steal her ID so they can access the trash
>>60996
He does though: an amazing, fashionable, professional reality tv host billionaire sports league owner all around winner.. etc, named Clyde.
It's a Hat of Glammering: It makes the user look dressed to impress, even in circumstances that he normally wouldn't. Even if the character is covered in blood and dirt, the helm changes their appearance to that of professional and proper attire for meeting even royalty.
Tl;dr, it's made so that the character's charisma-based checks function normally even in poor circumstances by glammering any clothing (or just lack of) that the character may be wearing into the best possible attire for that meeting, because the right outfit can impress anybody. Think of it like a cross between a Hat of Disguise and a Rod of Splendor.
He does though: an amazing, fashionable, professional reality tv host billionaire sports league owner all around winner.. etc, named Clyde.
It's a Hat of Glammering: It makes the user look dressed to impress, even in circumstances that he normally wouldn't. Even if the character is covered in blood and dirt, the helm changes their appearance to that of professional and proper attire for meeting even royalty.
Tl;dr, it's made so that the character's charisma-based checks function normally even in poor circumstances by glammering any clothing (or just lack of) that the character may be wearing into the best possible attire for that meeting, because the right outfit can impress anybody. Think of it like a cross between a Hat of Disguise and a Rod of Splendor.
File (): D3DCD331F6C5DD337BCC8111C1C24310-48790.jpg (47.6 KB, 800x620, nti_stm_65869_large.jpg)
>>60999
There is no command word to activate it. The hat immediately glammers the characters appearance to the appropriate outfit for that circumstance when put on, and maintains it until it is taken off. To change the outfit, the character can simply to put the hat back on.
There is no command word to activate it. The hat immediately glammers the characters appearance to the appropriate outfit for that circumstance when put on, and maintains it until it is taken off. To change the outfit, the character can simply to put the hat back on.
>>60987
I would go for selling an idea about a tv series. You can always try seduction later if it fails, right?
I would go for selling an idea about a tv series. You can always try seduction later if it fails, right?
>>61001
>Torcuil's new and improved battle strategy
>charisma check to make the victims friendly
>give them ale
>lightning
>ignites alcohol in victims body somehow
Uh, what exactly would that do to a person?
>victim dies
Gotta live up to his name.
>Torcuil's new and improved battle strategy
>charisma check to make the victims friendly
>give them ale
>lightning
>ignites alcohol in victims body somehow
Uh, what exactly would that do to a person?
>victim dies
Gotta live up to his name.
Okay seriously, what the hell are these disguises, what do they do, how do they work, and why can Trumpaladin not just look like captain Kirk? He's supposed to be fuckable, and an orangutan is not fuckable
>>61002
>"Little pony, I think I know a way to make the lady give us access to the utilities level. Do you trust me?"
>"Little pony, I think I know a way to make the lady give us access to the utilities level. Do you trust me?"
File (): 8F1FCBE240C7DE94E7EABB08072875BD-157218.jpg (153.5 KB, 1054x849, 1305600844125.jpg)
>>61005
Oh, I thought you were referring to the "sacrificial cauldron" meaning to the name.
>>61006
The disguise is generated with Dust of Illusion: it disguises the creator as if with the Disguise Self spell. The illusion lasts two hours. You could get a reflex save to avoid being disguised if you wanted to. I disguised Brad as an orangutan named Clyde because memes.
The hat is an item that I made up, that is meant to adorn the wearer in the most professional clothing imaginable, so that the character looks dressed to impress in any circumstance: it makes for a good prop in role-play, but also a helpful tool in the case of hasty diplomacy checks (which can take all kinds of circumstantial penalties).
>orangutan is not fuckable
This one is.
He looks sharp, confident, and ready to pick up bitches by the dozen.
Oh, I thought you were referring to the "sacrificial cauldron" meaning to the name.
>>61006
The disguise is generated with Dust of Illusion: it disguises the creator as if with the Disguise Self spell. The illusion lasts two hours. You could get a reflex save to avoid being disguised if you wanted to. I disguised Brad as an orangutan named Clyde because memes.
The hat is an item that I made up, that is meant to adorn the wearer in the most professional clothing imaginable, so that the character looks dressed to impress in any circumstance: it makes for a good prop in role-play, but also a helpful tool in the case of hasty diplomacy checks (which can take all kinds of circumstantial penalties).
>orangutan is not fuckable
This one is.
He looks sharp, confident, and ready to pick up bitches by the dozen.
>>61006
Tracy could use her dust to make him look like captain kirk, but I like the professional Mr. Clyde gig better.
Tracy could use her dust to make him look like captain kirk, but I like the professional Mr. Clyde gig better.
>>61008
Nah, his name orginally meant: Thor's cauldron.
Turn's out Thor used his league deep cauldron for almost endless ale.
Truely a norse story
Nah, his name orginally meant: Thor's cauldron.
Turn's out Thor used his league deep cauldron for almost endless ale.
Truely a norse story
>>61012
A very well-dressed, handsome, properly-groomed and charming orangutan. We're running on cartoon logic here.
That Bitch is a racemixer anyway.
A very well-dressed, handsome, properly-groomed and charming orangutan. We're running on cartoon logic here.
That Bitch is a racemixer anyway.
>>61011
>two different command words
>one brings forth pretty much normal ale.
>the second brings forth a magical ale that is highly flamible when exposed to electricity
>Torc shoots lightning from his arse
¿¿¿
>profit
>two different command words
>one brings forth pretty much normal ale.
>the second brings forth a magical ale that is highly flamible when exposed to electricity
>Torc shoots lightning from his arse
¿¿¿
>profit
>>61013
But it's an Orangutan
Whatever. If she says no, He'll call her a racist, and if she's hesitant, explain that it's the current year
But it's an Orangutan
Whatever. If she says no, He'll call her a racist, and if she's hesitant, explain that it's the current year
File (): 409C828C1AE3BB3F433DE30305DBC1A6-1361353.png (1.3 MB, 1920x1080, Look of Doom.png)
>>61020
Because I find the idea of a tall, handsome well-dressed, cartoonishly human-proportioned orangutan showing up to the city in his electric blue monster truck and immediately becoming the most popular man in the country, because everyone wants to get with the cool reality tv ape, to be hilarious beyond measure.
Because I find the idea of a tall, handsome well-dressed, cartoonishly human-proportioned orangutan showing up to the city in his electric blue monster truck and immediately becoming the most popular man in the country, because everyone wants to get with the cool reality tv ape, to be hilarious beyond measure.
>>61023
He doesn't literally turn into an orangutan: he just looks like one.
And the hat makes him look so well-dressed that everyone treats him like they would a human celebrity.
He doesn't literally turn into an orangutan: he just looks like one.
And the hat makes him look so well-dressed that everyone treats him like they would a human celebrity.
You know what, fuck it. I'm done fighting Tracy's faggot's autism.
>>60969
As That Bitch stands on or near the stage, she hears a massive revving of the kind that would bring tears to the eyes of any youth, because goddamn it's an awesome revving sound. A particularly impressive large green Monster Truck appears, and in it's window the most charming orangutan you've ever seen, wearing a red trucker's hat and a stripped black suit. The monster truck revs furiously as it demolishes a stand. Then another stand, the store keepers fleeing but admiring the awesomeness of the destruction of property. Flames shoot from the monster truck's exhaust tubes as it damn near dances about the fair grounds. The Orangutan gives That Bitch a wink as he does so.
The monster truck settles down and comes nearer that Bitch. The orangutan walks out in the coolest walk ever seen in a primate, like he already owns the world. "Hey now. My name ain't important, but my business is. You see, I hear you in the business of being fabulous, and I'm looking for some one to sell my brand. I got branches accross two cities, and we're expanding further. Selling everything from T Shirts to live entertainment. Got a whole league going. And I'm bettin' you could hook me up with some talent."
He gives her a charming look and approaches closer, letting her league of guards know just how awesome he is. "But if you're buyin', boy I got reality TV shows like you wouldn't believe. Tell me now, how many minorities - orangutan's like myself, you got hostin' TV series? What's your best ratings on those? Boi, you ain't got nothing like the splended crowds I draw over yonder, that I can tell you."
*acts charming*
>>60969
As That Bitch stands on or near the stage, she hears a massive revving of the kind that would bring tears to the eyes of any youth, because goddamn it's an awesome revving sound. A particularly impressive large green Monster Truck appears, and in it's window the most charming orangutan you've ever seen, wearing a red trucker's hat and a stripped black suit. The monster truck revs furiously as it demolishes a stand. Then another stand, the store keepers fleeing but admiring the awesomeness of the destruction of property. Flames shoot from the monster truck's exhaust tubes as it damn near dances about the fair grounds. The Orangutan gives That Bitch a wink as he does so.
The monster truck settles down and comes nearer that Bitch. The orangutan walks out in the coolest walk ever seen in a primate, like he already owns the world. "Hey now. My name ain't important, but my business is. You see, I hear you in the business of being fabulous, and I'm looking for some one to sell my brand. I got branches accross two cities, and we're expanding further. Selling everything from T Shirts to live entertainment. Got a whole league going. And I'm bettin' you could hook me up with some talent."
He gives her a charming look and approaches closer, letting her league of guards know just how awesome he is. "But if you're buyin', boy I got reality TV shows like you wouldn't believe. Tell me now, how many minorities - orangutan's like myself, you got hostin' TV series? What's your best ratings on those? Boi, you ain't got nothing like the splended crowds I draw over yonder, that I can tell you."
*acts charming*
>>61027
EMBRACE THE AUTISM
Also, kek...
Can Torc go talk to saw-horse if he can convince Death to bring her drink?
EMBRACE THE AUTISM
Also, kek...
Can Torc go talk to saw-horse if he can convince Death to bring her drink?
[1d20+25 = 34]
>>61027
Rolling a perform check (dance+tumble) to do monster truck tricks in the square and entertain the audience to show them that they are in fact performers.
"~Vroooooooooooom! Vroooooooooom!"
>>61027
Rolling a perform check (dance+tumble) to do monster truck tricks in the square and entertain the audience to show them that they are in fact performers.
"~Vroooooooooooom! Vroooooooooom!"
>>61033
>Infernius is currrently stuck in limbo rather than being taken to the underworld cause Death is on a date with Torc
>Infernius is currrently stuck in limbo rather than being taken to the underworld cause Death is on a date with Torc
>>61037
>hundreds of people are waiting to be taken to the underworld
>Death finally appears
>a chorus of "WHERE WERE YOU?" Rings out
>"On a date" Death says smuggly
>all these dead people wondering what kind of evil devil like man Death is dating
>...
>meanwhile
>"I still want that gnome dinner"
"I'll fucking fireball you"
>"Do it you fucking wimp"
>Casts fireball
>Snek somehow reflects it
>Torc blows all his facial hair off with a fireball
>hundreds of people are waiting to be taken to the underworld
>Death finally appears
>a chorus of "WHERE WERE YOU?" Rings out
>"On a date" Death says smuggly
>all these dead people wondering what kind of evil devil like man Death is dating
>...
>meanwhile
>"I still want that gnome dinner"
"I'll fucking fireball you"
>"Do it you fucking wimp"
>Casts fireball
>Snek somehow reflects it
>Torc blows all his facial hair off with a fireball
File (): 006484456BA2A871B3758833009C1293-281808.png (275.2 KB, 668x616, 1496187300870.png)
>Is not actually sure where to go from here
>>61040
Neither am I..
Roll Diplomacy after seeing their reaction, I guess...
It'll either work and we'll somehow get exclusive celebrity VIP access, or end up very awkward and potentially fatal...
Neither am I..
Roll Diplomacy after seeing their reaction, I guess...
It'll either work and we'll somehow get exclusive celebrity VIP access, or end up very awkward and potentially fatal...
File (): 230A70A17544E3A9BDA130EC21064015-366795.gif (358.2 KB, 777x864, f4385c8c85df9a2082344710a67c6f7f9c30cceadf061f9088e2089d5b536e52.gif)
I need to stay off of 8chan...
>>61052
Brad is disguised as a well dressed and fashionable orangutan, named Clyde. He's riding Tracy, who is aptly disguised as a huge, flame-spewing smoke-snorting monster truck.
The two had the idea to use their combined Charisma checks make themselves look like big shots to impress the locals, in hopes of following That Bitch towards wherever she's going, to get some VIP celebrity access deeper into the dome.
Tracy just made a performance check to impress the crowd with her monster truck maneuvers here >>61029 , and Brad is getting ready to roll Diplomacy after gauging their reactions.
Brad is disguised as a well dressed and fashionable orangutan, named Clyde. He's riding Tracy, who is aptly disguised as a huge, flame-spewing smoke-snorting monster truck.
The two had the idea to use their combined Charisma checks make themselves look like big shots to impress the locals, in hopes of following That Bitch towards wherever she's going, to get some VIP celebrity access deeper into the dome.
Tracy just made a performance check to impress the crowd with her monster truck maneuvers here >>61029 , and Brad is getting ready to roll Diplomacy after gauging their reactions.
>>61053
And the crowd is as stunned as I am. I'm actually curious as to how this is going, and you can consider that a degree of receptivity in the audience.
And the crowd is as stunned as I am. I'm actually curious as to how this is going, and you can consider that a degree of receptivity in the audience.
[1d20+60 = 71]
>>61054
Rolling for fucking everything Combined profession and diplomacy with Eagles Splendor attached. If you don't like that just use something else, like +38 for diplomacy, +32 for seduction, or something...
>>61054
Rolling for fucking everything Combined profession and diplomacy with Eagles Splendor attached. If you don't like that just use something else, like +38 for diplomacy, +32 for seduction, or something...
File (): 467BE27AF7ABD14A986BDAEF94BCF98E-976122.gif (953.2 KB, 500x375, dd-meme-stealth-is-optional-animated.gif)
File (): 261A30951CDDBF97F5325444EC126190-2341520.png (2.2 MB, 1484x1014, Screen-Shot-2017-01-13-at-1.40.39-PM.png)
[Reply] [Last 50 Posts] [Last 100 Posts] [Last 200 Posts]
You are viewing older replies. Click [View All] or [Last n Posts] to vew latest posts.
Clicking update will load all posts posted after last post on this page.
Post pagination: [Prev] [1-100] [101-200] [201-300] [301-400] [401-500] [501-600] [601-700] [701-800] [801-900] [901-1000] [1001-1100] [1101-1200] [1201-1213] [Next] [Live (last 100 replies)]
1213 replies | 112 files | 15 UUIDs | Page 32