RP Thread. Its D&D mixed with shitposting. Classic (flexible) rules, and more autism than you could shake a whole group of autists at, even if you did so autistically. New players area always welcome, whether continuing, one-time, or 'just shitposting'.
Welcome back to the ahem 'Bathhouse', a progressive thread that I'm sure plenty of anons wish would just fucking die already. What, its true,....
This particular beginning is heavily seasoned with enthusiasm and delight. Hot on the heels of killing a bunch of We Wuz, the party almost shattered for several reasons, both in-game and out. In spite of it all, the characters continue on their quest to do,... well,... stuff.
Trumpaladin has been gifted a quest from Lord John Elway. Infernius has been gifted a quest from the Fuhrer, Tracy wants to stab more shit, Torcuil is beginning to get clever with his use of Snek not like that you perv and Thez is thanking her lucky stars that she even exists anymore.
1310 replies and 149 files omitted.
>>48241>4 dmgWhat was I supposed to do? Have him have an aneurysm?
And Thez <whoooof> appears on scene,... with an unusual thickness to her skin. Its as though she's grown scales over her normal skin, aesthetically different (appearance-wise) but functionally the same as her previous Infernal appearance.
Also Infernius crawls on the scene to be a smartass.
>>48252>>48253>all these shitty rollsIt's gonna be a long night
[16d20 = 148]
Thez gets mad.
T> Flurry of Boops
>>48258Does... she fumble after the first 1 or does she get in the second critical boop?
It appears that everyone has been machine-gun booped, including a critical boop, before Thez rolled a fail.
Fuzzy spooder ring bonuses, what are they again?>>48254"Fucking son o' a whore."
Torc then notices Infernius crawling in
"Could you help me"
>>48258"MY NOSE"
>>48259No, the fail eliminates any further attacks.
Everyone was booped tho.
>>48260Does she have that multiple opponent attack feat? Who received critical boopage?
>>48251>Not every single round of every encounterWhere does it say you can't? The robe''s concealment increaeses as the the encounter progresses too. A normal cloak or robe gives you a +4 bonus on Sleight of Hand checks.
So long as you conceal your weapon, your enemy can't properly defend themselves, and are thus denied their dexterity bonus to AC, making them susceptible to Sneak Attacks.
>>48263I vote snek or Infernius gets the critical
[1d20 = 9]>>48261Boops meme magician
*casts heal moderate wounds*
>>48266>9We aren't gonna get shit done at this rate
>>48266>minorDude, its 4 dmg
>>48265Technically, Trump should get it cuz she booped him first (cuz he booped her first) but she likes Infernius better, and would have given him the critical boop. Its not a bad thing.
[1d20+26 = 36]
Tracy goes ahead, making sure to check for traps so the party doesn't get killed.
Search check to look for traps and hidden doors.
Inferius, could you cast Hide From Undead?
[1d20 = 6]>>48264Yeah, I'm pretty sure it doesn't work that way. I'm too busy booping to write a damned brief on the issue though
>>48266>Healing boopWhy didn't I think of that?
>>48265But snek has a different nose, so do you just boop him normally?
>>48267Rolling to Grab Tracy by the pussy, see if that gives a good roll
[1d20+16 = 27]
[1d20+26 = 41]
Trumpaladin detects Evil
Fae: Spot and Listen Check
>>48271Staph. Let Tracy go first. She has the stealth and trap sense.
>>48272
Going ahead then, which way is Tracy going?
>>48271>detect evilThe whole place, but nothing immediate from his current position.
>>48273I ain't going ahead. This is from the entrance
>>48268>4 dmgThat's fucking 7% of Torc's health
Does Snek gtt any snek skill points or no? I'm finishing up my char sheets so I'm trying to figure out all my item bonus and shite
>>48274I vote we go right
[1d20+24 = 38]>>48272Why was this deleted?
>>48274The right path.
Rolling to move Silently.
>>48277>>48274I vote Right, and door number 2
>>48277He can have 20 points to start with. At 1st he'll get the "1st level" remainder. No maxxing.
[1d20 = 6]>>48268*pinches thez's ass*
>>48269*casts protection from undead or whatever*
>>48279So if going down the hallway, the door on the left?
[1d16 = 13][1d20+26 = 31]>>48282To the place with stairs and where the mummy room was located, but the next door
Trumpaladin follows Tracy with Fae - way behind Tracy
Spot and listen check
>>48281Good, cast it on everyone.
So long as we don't attack, undead can't see, hear, or smell us, but they can still sense circumstantial shit, so no horsing around.
>>48282Is the door closed?
>>48281Hand slap-slap-slap "Stahp!"
>>48284The only door that's opened is the Mummy door.
>>48280That works, thanks again GM
[1d20+23 = 25]>>48285So, Tracy would have to open the door to see what's on the other side?
Search check to examine the door to see if it'd creak when opened.
[1d20+27 = 43]>>48291Also, trap sense because why not.
Do I add the +4 to the modifier when using Search to look for traps?
>>48291Wanna do a detect evil on the closed door first?
>>48293That'd take 3 rounds to get anything useful.
>>48294Do we not have 18 seconds to spare?
>>48290"Thez arousing all the time,it dont matter what form she take."
>>48296Yeah, but we can tell the number of enemies, direction, and relative strength of enemies at least near the door before opening it
>>48297"But... Scales? Lizards aren't sexy"
>>48297Infernius, when your character gets there, could you cast Disrupting weapon on Tracy's sword, so she can actually damage all these zombies? Sneak Attack can't do shit to them.
[1d20+21 = 39]>>48298Wait for the Roll to resolve.
Listen check, to detect anything on the other side of the door.
>>48299*casts disrupting weapon*
>>48288>blush>>48298Subjective, but scales = rough sex
>>48300Shuffling noises, but nothing particularly onerous.
>>48298"Then why you want to fuck dragon?"
>>48303"That can transform. So not while it's a dragon"