Well, the party has gotten some things in order and has made some arrangements and plans to attack Court City in full and not as a half-assed rescue mission because of a brain worm. Speaking of brain worms, the party just kinda shrugged their shoulders and forgot about that whole "Infernius going insane and running off" bit. Hmmm. Oh well. But anyway, everyone's got some ideas and plans to put in motion. Its too bad that Port Barry is currently surrounded one 4 fronts,... that's going to complicate things.
Welcome back to the Game thread, there's over 3 dozen of 'em by now, so pardon me if I skip the introductory formalities. If you want to join, or perhaps just join in on the shitposting cuz bored, feel free. I'm working on a metric to allow new players to get in without having to go through the process of full-on mapping out a character.
1138 replies and 155 files omitted.
>>39173You should know, you almost just got paralyzed to death. Just saying.
>>39175Dammit indeed
>>39178Also this
>>39168"Undead are creating life faster than practically any other method" echoes in Torcuil's head
T> "Ignore it, it is the insane ramblings of a thing long dead and far less relevant than it might seem."
>>39180regeneration wedding ring ftw
>>39178>the chain is wielded as a weapon in place of anotherReally? Then why can it still attack when it's owner is unconscious?
>>39179She should ask you. You've the one with Blink, Astral Gate, and all of that
>>39182You don't get to have six attacks in a round because "muh nic cage movie." Make an attack with the sword, or with the chain. One or the other
\r
>>39179A ghoulish face slowly drifts upward through the top of the pyramid.
"Our view of the law is that it - if somebody is here without sufficient documentation, that is not reason for deportation."
>>39183This desu
>>39183Fuck it then. Just go with the chain.
>>39184id rather be in the sewers than see that face and hear that voice desu
>>39185Use your sword, It has better numbers
Tracy has 31 strength, which gives her a +10 on Melee attack rolls and +10 on damage rolls
>>39180"Ominous, but okay. So does that mean we aren't going?"
>>39183>mount>>39184"Fucking 'no borders' people. Listen Troll I hate to pressure, but are we gonna go or are we gonna wait?"
>>39188Attack pelosi before going into the Pyramid death trap
>>39187... I don't want to drop the sword while flying...The chain is still Melee though, isn't it?
>>39188T> "I don't know about the pyramid, but it seems clear that that one (Pelosi) is our most immediate concern."
P> Magic Circle against Good
The air around Pelosi darkens and wavers for a moment.
>>39190It is, but its not so animate that Tracy can just 'let go'. Its animate in that it can be controlled at 60' length without incurring penalties.
[1d100 = 64]>>39185So crit with the first attack, and rolling for fumble check
>>39188P> "I believe that Hillary Clinton is one of the best prepared people in our history to rule Court City, with her vision, her knowledge, her experience, her strategic thinking, her connection to the Game people."
>>39193*A cold shiver runs down Trumpaladin's Spine*
>>39195Not in range, but I'll allow a pre-emminent chill to run down Trump's spine.
>>39192Does she still have her sword, or not?
[2d20 = 35]>>39191"Hmmmm, one sec"
>>39193"Fuck off shill"
Torc draws both pistols, firing a shot from each.
I meant to ask this a long time ago, can you make Intimidate checks during combat? For the sake of Demoralization option.
>>39198Yes, of course. Oh, I forgot to mention what happened with the chain. After a successful crit, the chain rebounded and wrapped around Trump's sword-arm. He's not wounded, but its a spiked chain and will take a round to remove effectively without injuring him.
>>39200Yes, but as a solid, don't bother against undead.
>>39201Thanks. Also GM, can Torc fire 2 or 4 shots per turn?
Why are we going with the first set of dice rolls?
Okay....
[1d20+21 = 25]>>39200Rolling for Intimidate, because why not?
Since she's two size categories larger, she gets a +8 bonus to it as well.
>>39202>Don't bother with Undead.Feel like doing it anyway.
[angry nightmare noises]
*roars at Ruth*
>>39207Dumb ass. That will cost you a round that you could have used to kill her
[1d20 = 3]>>39203Just 2, it takes a round for the pistols to re-constitute another bullet from water vapor.
>>39206Alright first off, though he took damage, this is the round where Infernius casts Cure serious, with saving throw.
>>39207RBG> Finger of Death
[1d20 = 9]
This is for Tracy's Finger of Death
(for a moment, I thought that the last one was Tracy's save, but it was Feinstein's)
>>39208I thought she could do that during combat.
Also, she'll use the next round to unwra the chain, while you try and finish her off with lay on hands.
>>39209>She failed a touch attack"You're about as good a mage as you are a jurist, Ginsby. Sad!"
>>39211Just for the record, she does have monster Fortitude while being ridden only, right?
>>39206Thanks
>>39209I figured. What do the shots Torc fired do?
>>39214That was a saving throw roll, and had it been Tracy's, Trump would be plummeting to the ground while 'riding' a corpse. Just saying
>>39218I thought it was an attack roll for a touch attack...
>>39216Does she have a nightmares's fortitude save bonus while being ridden? She has all of the other stats.
A nightmare's fortitude save bonus is +16.
>>39220Well, a Cauchemar's save, which is +17. Be advised that that's a total number which includes a +7 constitution bonus
[2d10+4 = 15]>>39217Yes. Both shots hit.
>>39219Newp
>>39220Still would have killed fyi
>>39223Cause damage....
>>39213Best one I could find on short notice
>>39221Her Cloak and Charm add +7 Charisma, and then Eagle's Splendor adds an additional +4 to that, for a total Char modifier of +6 added to the throw with Dark Blessing.
... The question is, how powerful is Ruth..?
>>39222Oh shit...
Checked..
>>39227Powerful enough. Tracy isn't dead, but she would be with a 3.
>GM waves nerf-hammer omenously>>39226No, its RBG's turn
>>39224Well you don't fucking say.
Maim, just damage, barely do shit?
>>39229But she just used it to cast finger of death on Tracy?
[1d20 = 13]>>39231Without sneak attacks or w/e they're just magical ranged weapons
T> Restoration
>>39232No, you're right, I'm getting the rounds mixed up
>>39232>>39234Alright.
Tracy uses her turn to unravel her chain from Trumpaladin's arm.
[persistent angry nightmare noises]
Nanci Pelosi shudders in place for a moment. She takes no damage, but is observably immobilized for a moment by the effects of a Restoration spell. Torcuil's move again. (on that front)
[1d20 = 16]>>39234Using his free, non-dominant left hand, Trumpaladin makes a melee touch attack
Using the Charm domain special power which you let me have through the "Devotion to a Cause" feat, Trumpaladin calls upon the Power of Elway to increase his Charm, for +4 Charisma. As a free action
Do I get more than one Melee Touch Attack?
>>39237And what are you
doing with that melee touch attack? Giving a massage?
>>39237Dude, no. Don't mess-up your turn by requiring a Concentration check.
Casting spells takes time.
>>39238Lay on Hands, I assume.
Pssst,... whats Infernius doing?
>>39239I know, but the way it was phrased was a let down. I was all visualizing it, and by his description I imagined him booping her with no effect.
>>39238Trumpaladin's left index finger lands squarely on RBG's nose
"Boop"
Eagles splendor and the charm power give him a total charisma modifier of +8, for a total of 128 possible damage to RBG. Trumpaladin allots as much of that as is necessary to kill the bitch a second time
"I'm appointing a Conservative in your place who will make Scalia look like thurgood Marshal. Believe me"
With the Power of Football, he unleashes a stream that sends her to the oblivion her style of jurisprudence and constitutional interpretation deserves.
\r
[Read more] [1d20 = 19]>>39234Well, ay. But theres a big fucking difference between taking a bullet to the foot, and taking one to the chest.
>>39236Torc throws Mr. Snek at Nancy, staff changing in midflight.
Grapple check on Pelosi from Snek
"Step on this"
[3d20 = 33]>>39240chop chop chop
"fucking kike! REEEEEEEEEEEEE"
>>39243Grapple success. Though formidable in being undead, Pelosi is a waif as far as strength is concerned, and Snek has little difficulty grappelling and occupying.
>>39242That's what I was looking for. With a blast of the holiest of Football, RBG's corporeal form (don't forget, liches shit) is blown away, scattered in a burst of dry flesh, dust, and bone.
>>39244Nice dubs. I more meant now that Feinstein is dead, cuz that cure spell ended her. I know I didn't make a big deal about it
okay, I never officially said "that kills her" but I figured it was a given since her head was hanging off her shoulders but he's now unoccupied in a 3" standing pool of poo.
>>39245[excited whinnying]
*snorts smoke*
>>39242>'Nice one on that, ~Flashy'[impressed monster noises]
>>39247>Pelosi>ThotI
should treat that as a 1 dice roll
>>39246"D'aww, I love you horsey"
*Pets horsey with both hands*
>>39245he searches her body.
and after finding nothing i climb out of the sewers and go to the docks.
>>39250*rears in mid-air, snorting a 15 ft jet of smoke*
[happy monster noises]
>>39251Nothing? No, u find stuff. I'll detail in a bit.
>>39252"Now let's loot her shit"
*Still petting horsey*
>>39257But she IS already dead,....
Oh fine, Torcuil memes Pelosi's corporeal form dead, since she was 1 round away from helpless (and thus dead) anyway.
>>39260>But she is alread deadYou hear that sound? Its the sound of a joke flying over your head
>>39264>I don't,... I don't know>>39265No, that's the sound of feigned-innocence humor being too subtle. In fact, with no sound at all.
Upon Pelosi's death, the floating pyramid begins to rotate in the water. Slowly at first, it increases in rotation, slowly causing larger and larger waves to lap at the docks.
>>39266>>39252"Tracy, remember how you wanted to kill devourers? Now is your chance"
Trumpaladin quickly directs Tracy to the ground to pick up any items that fell from RBG - very quickly - and then directs her back into the City, to see what happened while they were over the bridge
>>39264Ask if they need healing.
Worst case scenario, the Devourers took their souls.
Also, it's going to fucking suck if any of the General die again. That cumulative Death penalty is part of why I didn't even bother selecting leadership (also, low charisma)>>39269*does what he says*
>>39271T> "Ready? What are you thinking?"
As she says this, the pyramid's rotation has exceeded 1 rotation/second and increasing (is gonna teleport in a second, I'm just drawing it out), making the building otherwise inaccessable.
[1d20 = 12]>>39270Kill the devourers then. Search the material plane first, then the Ethereal, but get the souls back
>>39272>"They did not maintain their discipline... Sad!"Spot check for anything of interest that is moving
>>39273>1 r/s Damn
"Well, nothing now. My plan is fucked."
I educate her on plan T in the meantime
>>39277>>39275If that does succeed, then we can't jaunt into the structure. Can we blast holes into it with The Jolly Cunt's cannons?
>>39279Uses Detect Ebil as he goes back into the city
We may want to Jaunt to look for those fuckers though
>>39277>>39275Actually,... that would work, and aside from causing a total re-write of what I had planned
as always Torcuil has enough time to do it.
>>39281Is Trump going solo, or leading Tracy?
>>39282ive saved the day, hopefully i dont get punished for it.
>>39282It works both ways though, so you can't jaunt in
>>39283Riding Tracy, but she's obeying. See
>>39270 [1d20+21 = 37]>>39280That's an issue for another round.
We have some souls to repose first.
Tracy gathers up the things on the ground Trumpaldin directed her to, then Speeds off towards the city.
Rolling to Spot the aforementioned undead.
>>39286As in, the Devourers and Nightwalkers from earlier.
>>39286Very true. Those are MY souls, Goddamn it! They can't have them. We're killing every fucking one of them. Don't forget those cowards hide on the Ethereal plane too
>>39282"Wait, I'm a fucking retard"
Cas dimensional lock
>>39285On the one hand, yes. It would eliminate the party from entering for the duration of the spell, which would be 1 day/level but dispel-able. On the other hand, it eliminates the opponent's ability to escape, which might be a greater gain.
>>39289There it is. The pyramid begins to grind, as though suddenly striking at some unseen object as it rotates, slowing and coming to a stop. The torches at its corners have gone out, and it sits omenously in the water just off the docks.
>>39290There's also the option to blast it open while they're still inside it and siege the place.
>>39290>eliminate the party from enteringVia Ethereal Jaunt. The jolly Cunt is in the harbor and has cannons. I don't know if cute sex horse is still alive, but we're sending the Trebuchet too
>>39290"Now to get the other faggots. Troll, you should probaly stay here."
>>39295I think she said the whore house.
>>39296To the whore house! Go through the Ethereal plane if you think we'll catch any of those fuckers hiding there
Those are my souls. They can't have them
If that doesn't work, I'm going to tweet to get them to come to me
>>39294"Yes of course. I could go for some "tea" at the moment."
>>39295As Trump and Tracy near the port, they are shocked by the silence. Its not like the silence during the Soros invasion, where the whole was accented by roaring flames and dancing lights, this is more somber, muted, and repressed. The only sound that reaches them is that of a faint wailing and sobbing, while their eyes are struck with dead bodies everywhere. Mostly undead, but plenty of humans lie about. Some cleavved apart, others gashed and scraped into a gore-shaped mess, a few even can't be identified as bodies, though its clear
something was there. Civilians peek fearfully out from behind buildings and rooftops as Trump and Tracy arrive, and as the sound of wailing increases, it becomes apparent that it is Thez that is the source. She's fugged up, wounds all over, bleeding from everywhere, but she's fixated on the corpse of a particularly large Devourer that lies still at her feet. Trump and Tracy touch down, and upon approaching, they find they recognize the face splayed upon the center-mass of the Devourer that Thez stands over. And not just that one, but several others that line the area. Despite the horrid and monstrous visage of the Devourer, the face on the creature in the torso of several is familiar... painfully so.
"I,... I..." Thez weakly mutters as both approach. "I'm sorry." she finally manages, breaking into more sobs.
P.S. the fight is decided, this is interactive cinema and story
[Read more] >>39298That works, just note that Trumpaladin would have directed Tracy to chase down Devourers on the Ethereal plane, and would have sent tweets to attract the enemy to him
Sech's face adorns the largest of the Devourers, as well as a pair of the generals (for Trump), some of the Gestapo (for Infernius), a few of the Fight Club (also for Thez) and a pair of the Spartans.
Its not just Devourerers that line the streets, there's all kinds of undead, but those are the ones that are significant at the moment.
>>39298Also, Smash the Devourer, and free the souls
>>39298>he face on the creature in the torso of several is familiar… painfully so.Aww fudge!
>>39299A Devouer's victim can't be resurrected even after the Devourer is destroyed, desu. They can only be reposed from the torment...
We sad nao...
>>39301"I,... <sniff> I tried that. Their essence had already been consumed." Thez finally says after a few moments of composure (and a few moments of smashing bodies for good measure).
>>39303REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEs can be heard in the distance.
>>39300Tracy lets a drawn-out sigh as she looks over the scene, saying nothing.
Tracy paces around the battlefield gloomily. Still looking around to spot any more enemies.
Sorry, I'm not pacing for dramaticism, I just got an important phone call, I'll be back in 5
>get back
Fuck
Torc runs into port barry looking for the rest of party.
"GUYS? THERE'S SOMETHING YOU MIGHT WANNA SEE!"
>>39313I thought he was headed towards the docks?
>>39312*Raises his hand and hold his palm open in a "halt" moton*
>>39316*places other hand on horse (pony?) muzzle. But he does not move his hands in a petting fashion*
>>39314i never got the loot of the lich.
>>39316*grapples horsey as he collapses crying*
>>39317[sympathetic pony noises]
>>39318Just say he gathered everything he could find in the sewer, and promptly went to the dock to wash it all off.
Okay. So, in spite of the party resources (entertron, etc) there is a distinct presence of - shall we say - unrecoverable civilians.
>>39318Its not going anywhere
>>39317>>39316>>39315D'awww
>>39315Torc stops in front of Trump Tracy and Thez.
"You guys, there's something you might wanna see at the do..."
Torc then relizes the looks on everyones faces, and quickly notices who's gone
He doesn't notice the devouers in detail"Oh no, is Infernius okay?"
>>39323Thez looks up, a shocked and panicked look on her face. "He was at the bridge with,..." she looks at Trump. "Where is he!" she phrases it as a demand, but her voice is pleading.
>>39322>>39324climbs out of a manhole with sweet loot.
>>39319[consoling pony noises]
*licks crying hoo-man affectionately*
>>39321You wouldn't know until you washed all the poo off.
Tracy just threw Ruth's in her bag.
>>39325>covered in poo* >>39324"I don't know..."
>>39323To Torcuil
"look"
Points at the devourers
>>39326*Deflates horsey, and cuddles her*
*Writes speech to deliver to the citizenry when there is a chance*
>>39329*cries, burying his face into blue fur*
>>39325"Infernius my pal, you smell like ass. Glad youre okay."
>>39327"Look at w...
Oh..."
>>39331*accommodates him, patting the back of his head*
[comforting pony noises]
>>39332"Shhh!"
*gestures towards corpses*
>>39332*points to devourers*
"Sechs is gone. As are several of my men. And your men. And Thez's. And others..."
>>39337Thez, face tear-stained and still flowing. "Its... its all," she clears her throat and says in the meekest voice ever heard (from her), "Is all my fault."
She gazes into Infernius' eyes for a moment, and he can see that there is much to be said, but for the moment, she hangs her head, collapses to her knees, and her shoulders start to quiver.
>>39338In a whisper, in the hopes that only Thez will hear her
"I knew they were likely to simply jaunt into the town, yet we stayed at the gate..."
>>39337*places other hand on Minotaur*
>>39334*holds pony tightly*
>>39338*picks up thez*
"it not your fault thez it gonna be okay theres no time to be sad we go straight to genocide for this transgression."
>>39339"I knew too, but I didn't think they'd be able to IN the town. I thought the churches to Rockwell and Hitler and Football would be enough to repel them. But," she crumbles as she says it "It was me."
"From the very beginning, I unhallowed the whorehouse when I was infernal, and they found it. They sensed it and they used that to their advantage."
Torc stands to the side akwardly looking at his stuff.
She looks at Trump first, "This is not my doing," then at Infernius "but it is my fault," then at Sechs-Devourer. "and not theirs."
>>39343Trumpaladin says absolutely nothing to Thez
>>39346"Look before you. The Devourers are already dead. It won't bring our men back"
As the dialogue continues, a shambling sound occurs from an adjacent alley. It sounds like something scraping a large mass across the ground.
>>39347"it is said the man takes on the wives sins. so me will kill who sent these me kill all faction leaders in court city after i kill this fucker
>>39350"
>>39350charges!
>>39352"Calm down Infernius. You don't know what it is..."
Don't kill off a possible source of exposition >>39351>>39352As Infernius charges, and Torcuil draws attention, a blood-splattered Slovenia shambles out from the alleyway, with a very decrepid moan issuing from her mouth.
>>39354"fuck! slav horse its gonna be okay!"
cures critical wounds!
>>39354Trumpaladin runs to her, and feeds her a heal serious wounds potion from the flask from Korak
>>39354"Oh fuck! It's Woody!"
*runs over to check condition*
>>39355>>39356"Oh wat? Oh thank goodness! Dispel!" she calls, and the images of blood spatter and decay on her person (hoerson?) vanish. "I didn't know what to do, the terbuchets worked marvelously, but we were overwhelmed from behind."
"Yeah guys listen, I hate to break you all up and intrude, but there is you all really need to see at the docks."
>>39358*Hugs pony*
"You did marvelously. Our defenses held the line. There was a vulnerability deep in town, known about before but never closed because of
political reasons which the enemy exploited."
>>39358"Let me have a look at it."
*slinks off into stealth*
>>39366i was asking thez if she was hurt.
[1d20+19 = 27]
Rolling to Move Silently
>>39369>>39368Slovenia had disguised herself as an equine Zombie, and then dispelled the disguise when she saw the party. She was not injured
And while GM is want to make jokes about being overwhelmed from behind,....
>>39360Um, this
>>39359"This was ages ago, before you arrived. She," indicating Thez "Drove them off, but not before they had wreaked havoc on those assembled."
>>39369"I... I've had worse," she says, holding back sobs. She's completely demoralized.
>>39371i know slovenia is alright, i was inquireing about thez health in particular.
>>39360"Guys? You realy need head to the docks. Some really weird shit is happening."
>>39370Don't think you can fool me on why you are going to the docks
>>39375Oh. Fucking really? Now? She's still useful you know
>>39373>>39377Alrighty then. Trumpaladin goes to the docks
>>39377"what kind of weird shit?"
>>39375Aside from the obvious? The citizens and the party?
>>39380"We should probably go see for ourselves"