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Super Lazy Nuts
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.34464
This is the Nuts thread. Its based on D&D 3.5e rules,... but only loosely, and only as a baseline. It's really an anything goes free-for-all, continuous RP thread. If ur interested, say "Hi" or announce yourself and GM or participants will be happy to assist. In the meantime, much of the party just jumped into the Ethereal Plane to murder some shit, cuz why not? We haven't killed anything (well Thez has) in like 3-4 days now (real-time, not game time) and like I said, why not?
995 replies and 73 files omitted.
Anonymous
jStTv
?
No.35288
35290
To Tracy:
"Don't let them get away! Pursue! Charge! Kill!"
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35289
[frenzied monster noises]
*rears with a feverish snort*
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35290
35292
>>35288
Tracy gladly complies charging toward where she's directed at full speed.
She replies something through the empathetic link, but it's unintelligible. She's just bloodthirsty.
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35291
For the record, if Tracy is directed to charge, she's probably going to comply no matter what.
Js2CQ
?
No.35292
35294
[1d20 = 16]
>>35287 see >>34627
>>35290
Tracy closes distance in a single round-movement with one, but draws an attack of opportunity from it
Js2CQ
?
No.35293
[2d6+4 = 11]
The attack lands doing minimal damage. Trump's turn.
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35294
>>35292
Thx, does Susan respond?
jStTv
?
No.35295
35296
[4d20 = 38]
Full round slashing
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35296
35297
>>35295
Kill. One remains, in full flight. In range, with a full round motion from Tracy, who's turn it is. (blah blah, attack of opportunity, blah murder, blah, murder murder murder, and murder murder). Okay, they're all dead. There's 8 bodies strewn about the area.
jStTv
?
No.35297
35299
[1d20 = 17]
>>35296
Trumpaladin regains lucidity, and tries to calm or stay Tracy for the moment.

Spot check. Detect evil
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35298
35302 35306
>Susan
>>35246
"You're not exactly giving me a choice in the matter. Either stew in this filth, or 'potentially' run free and frolick amongst the birds and animals, yeah?"

Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35299
35300 35301 35302
Tracy slows to a stop and snorts feverishly, padding the ground beneath her.
>>35297
[frisky monster noises]
She isn't calm, but his voice comforts her
*panting* (snorting)
She turns her head and nibbles at him
"Did I do well, ~Flashy?"

AQaaannd I g2g
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35300
>>35299
Later, have fun
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35301
>>35299
*pets horsey on the head, moving her ears to and fro.*
"You did very well my beloved mount. Now listen, in case those were the attack dogs of someone more dangerous"
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35302
35303
>>35299
See ya
>>35298
"You want some more food?
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35303
35304 35306
>>35302
"Oh, cut the crap. What do you want to know? I'll fukkin' tell ye, just to get the show on the road. They give me magical transport devices, I get all sneaky sneaky and jack people's shit, and then use the devices to get away. Rrrrragggghhhhhh!" His body cast shakes around a bit as he fails in the attempt to flail in frustration.
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35304
35307
>>35303
"Calm down mate. I was just making myself food and was wondering if you wanted any. Though, can you get me the device?"
Mr. Sneks lifts his head and stares at what seems to be causing his master distress.
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35305
I gtg for an hour
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35306
35307
>>35298
>>35303
"yea thats my offer."
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35307
35308 35309
>>35304
<whooof> Thez pops back in "Sorry it took so long, they insisted I beat them. By the way, the Fight Club may stop by and use the Entertron,... in a bit maybe."
>>35306
"You'll trust me, just like that. Either you're a fool, or you're supremely confident."
hij0+
?
No.35308
35311
>>35307
So assuming a follow up detect evil casting, a spot check, and hopefully what would have been listen and spot checks from Tracy all revealed nothing, Trumpaladin steps down to inspect the killed creatures. He wants to try to determine what he can about what they are, where they came from, and so forth. And of course... look for treasure or loot
\r
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35309
35311
>>35307
"me let you decide which it is."
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35310
35312 35313
Tracy moves up to one of the corpses and sniffs it curiously.
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35311
35316
>>35308
No evil, and no possessions or treasure to speak of. Tracy could track. Pssst, detect evil only has a 60' range,... looking is a better way of determining threats
>>35309
He thinks for a moment. "Define help."
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35312
35313
>>35310
"Want to track where these things came from? Do you have any idea what they are?"
NBd4A
?
No.35313
35314 35315
[1d20+21 = 26]
>>35310
"You think these things will taste good?" She implores, as she begins dismembering the corpses and tossing tender parts in her bag.
>>35312
"I don't know what they are, but they smell.. interesting..." *mouth waters a bit*
(this is my way of implying that she vaguely senses that they're some kind of fiend. She has a taste for fiends.
Idk if it'll work at all, but rolling a Track check to see if she has any clue where they could've come from.
hij0+
?
No.35314
35320
[1d20 = 4]
>>35313
"Careful with those! You don't know what they are or what they do"

Trumpaladin takes interesting parts himself, like feathers or beaks

Spo check, because why not
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35315
35317 35320
>>35313
"They do, and they've got 4 drumsticks each!!" Thez yells, though technically Tracy wouldn't hear her, nor would she have heard Tracy in the first place.
>infernal
...maybe,... yeah.

Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35316
35318
>>35311
"you help us find our gold then you can go your own way."
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35317
35318 35320
>>35315
Trumpaladin casts "Detect Poison" on the bird
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35318
35319 35320 35321 35324
>>35316
He squints his eyes and remains motionless for a moment. "I'll do it, but I will need my blades and some of that haggis," he says pointing at Torcuil's plate inb4 haggis jokes. "And I get a portion of the retrieved gold," he says, his eyebrow twitching, betraying a bit of daringly overzealous negotiating.
>>35317
Other than the intestinal tract, its clean.
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35319
35322
>>35318
"you get 3%"
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35320
35321 35322
>>35314
>You don't know what they are or what they do
Cast Detect Poison if you're so concerned, fgt. Even I think they look delicious.

Tracy tells Trumpaladin that she's more tan capable of handling the bodies, and that she'll give him any piece he wants later after butchering. She then unfurls her skin-sack and ties wraps the parts that didn't fit in her Bag of Holding into a bundle.
>>35315
Do "infernal" and "fiend" mean the exact same thing?
>>35318
Tracy saves the intestinal tracks in a separate container on her saddlebags, considering that they might be useful later.
>>35317
Did you ever consider asking Vadereim about monsters with Ebil Auras? An intelligent bane sword might be at least be able to identify a fiend.
Also, freaking talk to him. What's the point in having a talking sword if you never speak to him? He might know quite a bit, considering that he's a relic from a previous campaign.
hij0+
?
No.35321
35322 35328
[1d20 = 19]
>>35320
I thought about it, then figured he probably couldn't provide much more than the alignment,
but fuck it

I don't know if he can let her eat those things. Would they mutate the child? Could they? He's not going to gamble letting his his child turn into a freak just to avoid starting
a fight. He'd rather start a fight.


>>35318
Well Fuck it. Trumpaladin asks Vanderiem, who hopefully is sobering up by now
"Hey Vandy! What the hell are these things? Do you have any idea?"

Aslo, wisdom check on the type of poison in the intestines

Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35322
35326 35328 35332
Thez is confused. "You're trusting him?" to Infernius
>>35319
"4.4"
>>35320
No! Glad you asked! Infernal is a blanket term referring to an external plane (outside material) that is "Not Good and not primal/natural". The NAP is infernal at the perimeter of the concept. Diabolical refers to devils and Abyssmal is then demons.
WAIT! No, Trump is right. Its so small, almost like a second appendix, except its above the throat box. These things do have a poison gland. They were never in range and still long enough to try, but they spew poison smoke.
>Vandereim
Several previous campaigns. He's literally older than Thez.
>>35321
They're from acheron meta, its a plane of war, not creepy hellish corruption.
"Fucked if I know lad. I heard ye had some drink a bit earlier tho."
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35323
35326 35328
P.S. The poison in the intestines is poo.
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35324
35325
>>35318
>Torc hands him a plate of haggis
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35325
35330
>>35324
"You know I'd accept it,... but this here body cast,...."
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35326
35327 35329
>>35322
Trumpaladin gives more alcohol to Vanderiem because he seems to be asking for it, and recommends to Tracy to cut off and save the poison glands.

Did Tracy's search check reveal anything?

>>35323
Kek

>>35322
>Thez is confused
Well, I can say that scene would never have gone down that way with Trumpaladin there. He can never trust any evil aligned creature than isn't Lawful - never. We'll see how it goes down
Anonymous
Js2CQ
?
No.35327
35331 35334 35335 35339
>>35326
pssst Darkie isn't evil
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35328
35336 35338
Spoilered
>>35321
The foal has a literal fiend for a parent. It was conceived while she was transformed: the parts of her womb that regenerated did so because of her transformation. On top of that, it was mentioned in the Elway prophecy, so it absolutely won't be a "normal" child. Eating devil-chickens won't do anything extra to it.
The baby might have uber-demigod powers or some other crazy horseshit, but I'm sure it'll still be adorable. Stop worrying about things that might "mutate"
it, because it's already more than likely to be something unique.

Sorry...
>>35322
Tracy pulls-out the poison glands and puts them together in a jar on her saddlebags.
>>35323
*dumps intestines out after realizing it's not killing anyone*
NBd4A
?
No.35329
[1d20+21 = 39]
>>35326
>Tracy's search check
You mean the Track check?
Search check because he asked.
Anonymous
y/S/t
?
No.35330
>>35325
Torc feeds susan the haggis
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35331
>>35327
....

Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35332
35340
>>35322
"dont worry swetie me know how theese types get when offered a payday."
"3.5"
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35334
35340
>>35327
detect good?
Mrs. Sentry
NBd4A
?
No.35335
35348 35350
>>35327
... He's an Assassin, isn't he?
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35336
35337 35340 35343
>>35328
Why you post such evil gifs? He doesn't want a child that's 25% Judeo-bolshevik and 25% uber feminist. If it must be part Jewish, at least let it be the good kind of Jew
Anonymous
XDyPe
?
No.35337
>>35336
there are no good jews.
Anonymous
hij0+
?
No.35338
35343
>>35328
She's supposed to be a pony...