Continuing the (eh?) compelling story of Torcuil the Meme Magician, Trump the (ahem) Shining and Resplendent Paladin, Tracy the edge-lord (multiple meanings there), and Infernius the Minotaur.
The party has found its self overlooking a rocky hillock leading toward a town into which several large and small rivers connect. Chirpy birds 'bweeet' from their nests and posts, while squirrels jubilantly roll in the dirt (they do that FYI) while foraging for resources.
It is the very depiction of the phrase "Whatever could go wrong?".
Join us new viewers and anons, for a spectacle of autism and bemusement. ITT we continue,...
THE GAME
(u just lost BTW)
Previous bread
https://mlpol.net/vx/res/1799.html375 replies and 67 files omitted.
>>2629not the first time some one has called a jew a fairy
>>2625Lenos sparks the J and takes a phatty rip, then offers it to Lee.
"So, basically this is a place you can go nuts. I'm not too great on the particulars, but you're kinda supposed to."
>>2633*takes joint*
*inhales*
What am i supposed to do man?
>>2634"Whatever you want. Me, I mostly just set things on fire
and by things he means people, but whatever floats your boat. There are others by the way, but they're off doing,... well I don't know what they're doing, but they left a while ago."
>>2635Things on fire? Like doors?
>>2637Thats pretty funny, you couldn't get me though. Haha
>>2638"Challenge accepted!" he swigs the rest of his beer and then wanders over to a tap sticking out of the wall. "So. Here you'll find everything you need,... ever,... except raw materials. There's a machine or device for whatever you might want to accomplish,... you'd probably like that burlap striking pad next to the coffee-machine, but yeah this place has it all. Let me know if you have any questions. There generally aren't any actual fights unless everyone else is present, and that's a tangent in its own right, but for the most part this building is here for you and others to utilize.
>>2639I think ill go and meet the rest of the people.
*hands him a handful of seeds and another joint*
>>2640He puts the joint behind his ear and the seeds in his pocket.
"They're gonna be surprised when you show up, but when you do don't mention me. Just play it off," he winks at you before heading through the double-doors and up the stairs to the dais.
He looks irritatingly at the sphere. With a 'tch' he waves the sphere away, draws up an interface protocol and starts tapping away. The sphere is replaced by a stargate-looking orifice.
"If you really want, stepping in that will put you right next to 'em. Tell the purple one that Lenos sent you."
>meanwhileElsewhere (meaning everyone else) a weird upside-down whirlpool appears in the air about 15' up, a little ahead of your progress.
>>2641Alright, thanks man
*i jump through the portal*
Thez does a ninja-like spin as the whirlpool appears and looks at it suspiciously, but stops proceeding.
>>2641i draw my sword when the portal appears.
>>2642You jump through the portal and experience a moment of disorientation. A moment ago you were going forward, and now you're going down, all in the same direction. Since you're a monk though, you successfully land on your feet.
Not far off are a Minotaur with a freaky-big sword, a most-resplendent Trump-lookin' dude in overly shiny armor, a light-blue pony with knives and a weird expression, and a hippy in pale hide.
*continues to sharpen knife*
Scanning the horizon, you also see a nearby fellow clad in billowing tartan robes. The hills roll from higher (a large, walled edifice) to a spacious valley with rivers and a walled city.
Fuck! I didn't read any of those recent posts, and I did not know what was going on
*Looks up*
>>2649A Yak just dropped out of a hole in the sky.
[sharpening stops]
*looks up*
"Oh great, another bovine.
Welcome to our little party, Shaggy."
>>2652This. He's dressed in simple garb with clear signs of wear (he's not flush with cash, to be sure), but everything about him seems clean and disciplined.
The Minotaur is holding his massive sword, the blue pony is sharpening a knife (and is the last to notice you), while Trump seems unimpressed and the tartan fellow seems to have caught a breeze and is adopting a statuesque pose.
>>2653You're pretty cute for an earth pony
The whirlpool unceremoniously 'fa-whoomps' closed, leaving blank space.
The hippy looks at you quizzically. "Whoa man, you just sorta fell from the sky man. Thats not cool man."
>>2655"Why, thank you, you two-hooved mistake.
What brings you here? Dead, I assume?"
>>2658Hey no need to be so hostile babe, yeah i died im guessing its more of the same for you?
>>2657When I say the hippy, I don't mean you at the moment. There's a hippy in addition to you.
>>2660I know i said that to him in character.
Other hippy looks like this
Hey purple person i have something to tell you.
>>2664You don't detect a purple person
>>2656>>2663I was told there was someone that would be purple with you,where are they?
>>2668The hippy chuckles. "Whoa man, that seems far out. Who told you this man?"
>>2530*continues to hump leg, unrestrained*
>>2668The smaller blue pony seems to have an itch, that they're scratching using the armor of the TRUMP-lookin' dude
>>2672What kind of leg armor is he using?
>>2674Trumpaladin? Only the finest in gilded, platinum-plaated and TRUMP embossed greaves.
>>2675No shit. I'm asking; what kind of armor plating does he have below the knee?
>>2679I fuck the back of his kneecap
[1d20 = 1]>>2680>>2679i grab him before he fucks trump friends knee
>>2681Hey,babe plenty of knees to go around ;)
[1d20 = 10]>>2684"YOU ASKED FOR IT!"
*unironically stabs at this dirty faggot's hoof assaulting*
>>2688Fucking shit, I meant to say *'assaulting hoof'.
>>2680You try, but the pale-blue pony prevents you, assertively.
>>2681They (the blue one) seems particularly insistant.
And, while I was typing this, you all decided to attack each-other,
>>2605Oh,
Okay
>walks off crying>>2641I dont remember summoning this shit
>yakOh shit
>>2690Uh, hi yak thing
>>2692The weird (everything is weird, but esp the blue pony) STABS U IN THE FUKKIN LEG. U have a knife in ur leg and you're not sure why.
[1d20 = 18]>>2699Elway why!!!!
I punch the bitch in the head.
[1d20 = 5]>>2700*Don't even dodge, just stab straight for the stomach*
[1d20 = 15]
I whack with my longbow whoever needs a good whacking (weirdly I think that does not include Tracy)
>>2692Fucking kek
>>2699>>2697>>2700The first person to say
"I need healing" will not get fucking healed by my dank memes
[1d20 = 3]>>2701>I get punched with no reward"Fuck!"
*triple wields*
roll to attack and take off what's left of this faggot's leg.
ALRIGHT FUCKING THOTS
WHO NEEDS THE MEME MAGE TO MAGIC TO INTO HEALING?
[1d20 = 2]>>2711Wanna pull this knife out of my leg doc?
>>2712i turn as you try to stab him, "we need talk"
[1d20 = 3]
i heal him with heal minor wounds
[1d20 = 10]>>2714"DON'T YOU DARE GET IN MY WAY, YOU FUCKING SPORTS DRINK PARODY! IMMA FUCKING CUT THIS FAGGOT!!!"
*goes for the yak again*
>>2716(in baby-doll voice) "Just defending your honor, ~Flashy!"
[1d20 = 2]>>2719*takes hit for yak*
stop before you piss me off tracey MOOOOOOO
[1d20 = 20]>>2720>>2719Struggle to get away from the hold
>>2721uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
will you fucking idiots stop fighting like fucking ziggers and calm down?
[1d20 = 15]
Trumpaladin invokes the magic of Football to BLOCK attacks against himself, awhile he evaluates the situation
[1d20 = 1]>>2720"WTF is it your problem?! This faggot literally just fell from the sky and assaulted my husband, and now your defending him?!"
>>2721"Oh no you don't"
*Pursues on all fours, brandishing knife in maw*
[1d20 = 9]
Trumpaladin whacks the yak with his longbow
Okay, I've read the latest several times and this is the most accurate rendition I can come up with.
>>2725>>2726am not smart but i wont let you kill innocent yak
[1d20 = 5]>>2722Since no one is fucking listening I roll to freeze everyone
[1d20 = 8]>>2729Roll to block magic attack using power of football