/mlpol/ - Happy Birthday horse fuckers!

Thousands of millions of years ago, in the time of no Football, there was only the great primordial ooze, which was the void, and was not the Football. And yet the Football was there in the thing that was not yet Football, waiting to be released unto Football so that it could become Football.

And in those days there were thousands of ponies, who did wander the bleak and barren earth that had not yet been created because of no Football, and they wandered in darkness and wished that there was Football. Eventually, John Elway heard their prayer in the form of Dan Reeves, and did travel thus from his heroic battle with the Washington Redskins, who at that time were not yet called the Oakland Raiders, and ejaculated inside Rainbow Dash to produce Football, which would be He who is Football, the Divine Football, conceived of Dan Reeves, born of the Lady Dash, he who is cast in Football, the First and the Last and the Football for all the Football of times of Football, he who shall not be named. And the name he shall not be would be Frank, for that was not his name and he would never be called that, for his name was instead John Elway.

And when John Elway did kick that really sweet field goal that went for like seven hundred thousand billion miles, he did ascend into Football, and he did tell the ponies of Equestria: take heed. For on this day, one thousand trillion years hence, some gook's website will pull a prank that will go horribly and beautifully awry, and on that day shall be once again born the Football, and I shall be among you again. And the heavens shall be rent asunder and rain Football upon the unbelieving weebs of the question and answer board, and it shall pass thence into the digit-worshippers of the meta board, and shall thence pass back again into the question and answer board. And the White people shall rejoice at the liberation of their people from the gook menace and receive Football, and all the ponies shall receive sex and also Football, for in the Name of John Elway shall evermore the Football be Football.

And, as the prophecy foretold, on that day, the First of April 2017, it was so, and there was Football for all the people and ponies of the world. But not the blacks or the Jews. Praise American. Praise Football.

Happy birthday, horsefuckers. Enjoy the literal oldest image in my /mlpol/ folder.

/mlpol/ - My Little Politics

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