/sp/ - Football

Could John Elway create a football so great that even he couldn't throw it 70 yards?

>>1164
If we assume it is possible, is there a planet/atmosphere capable of sustaining such a FoOtball? Is this the secret to storing Footballs in space?

Is the Earth actually a giant Football? Are all the stars and planets? That would make them all His, and since we know that they are all His, that leads to conclude that all of creation is Footballs, experiencing Football in one form or another.

>>1171
So when people say "we are all stardust" they were half right...

>>1171
The sun is a giant football, and from within the power that is vested thee this football hatch. For this football is also a egg. A egg of football. From this amalgamation of both football and egg will birth a new age called The Big Bang, but more like a kick. The Big Kick actually (the big bang title is reserved for when John Elway does the hanky panky with his with waifu, which he doesn't as he is pure), a really big kick by the way. The biggest kick you and the entirety of the tri-decca multiplex multiverse will ever see. Such a field goal it will be that the tri-decca multiplex multiverse will die, then be reborn again as the footballverse.

>>1171
>>1177
>>1178
I the stars and planets really were composed of football, then that would indeed make John Elway the father of the father of the Sun, Moon, and stars.
Another thing one might notice is that the path that our solar system's planets follow around the sun is ovular in nature: it resembles not only the shape of a football, but that of a football field as well. This is caused by the gravitational "flick" effect, the spacial equivalent of a quarterback receiving a football and casting it back across a field. The act of moving the football back and fourth across the field is a reenactment of John Elway's revelation of the notions of footballic harmony.
Like the ancient denbtniggers once wrote:
"Of John Elway we are told that he was the first to understand, by diligent attention and observation, the movement of both the sun and the moon and the other footballs, and the seasons as well, in that they are caused by these footballs, and to make these facts known to others; and that for this reason he was called the father of these footballs, since he had begotten, so to speak, the speculation about them and their nature."

>>1189
But if footballs are the fundamental particle from which all existence is built, AND the entire cosmos is its self a Football, AND John Elway was the first to conceive and understand Football and is therefore the father and progenitor of Football, then naturally John Elway is Football and Football is John Elway.
The question that springs to me then, is:
How can there ever have been a time at which John Elway, whether in the form of Man or Football (its self a polarized duality!) did NOT exist?

Setting John Elway aside for a moment, one cannot neglect the third phase of Football. There is Football and Footballs, there is John Elway, and there is the Denver Broncos. No individual Bronco is themselves Football, they are but a piece of a whole Football, and that Football is John Elway. If all the Denver Broncos got together, would they be Football? Of course! It is through this method that the Denver Broncos came to manifest! How else do you think John Elway was able to spread Footballs throughout the cosmos?
So completes the Bowly Trinity:
John Elway the Father
Football the Son
The Denver Broncos the Hoovy Spirit
Merry Equestrian

I agree, existential dilemmas are fucking weird. You know what else is weird? The fact that there are still people on this earth who don't bow down and worship the almighty majesty of Denver Broncos quarterback John Elway.

John Elway was born in December over 1000 years ago, in a time before there was time, because football is time and this was a time without football. It was a dark time, obviously, since football is light and light is friendship and friendship is magic.

Then, Dan Reeves did befriend and seduce the Lady Dash, and came inside her, and she burst forth a football, who was the football for all time, John Elway. And John Elway did proclaim himself to be football and exploded into football and then there was football for all time.

Praise Jesus Christ and Praise Football (praise football). Praise American.