/mlpol/ - My Little Politics

I wish to be the pee that goes into the filly's mouth.

>>219872
I wish to be the filly that is in charge of pee production

>>219873
H-Hot

>>219879
Benis :DDDDD

I wonder why we haven't had a Gondola Filly before now...

>>219882
Because you touch yourself at night.

>>219863 →
Feels good man.

WHICH WONE of YOUU fucking reeetards spammin' DERBYBOORU?! XD XDDD

Hi Anon! My name is Milky Way, and I'm going to be your wet nurse!

>>219919
>Derbybooru
I chuckled.

>>219921
>Wet nurses are employed if the mother dies, or if she is unable or elects not to nurse the child herself.
I-I just want mamma suckles...

Anon, I'm going to ask you something very uncomfortable and mildly suggestive!

>>219947
We all do, filly....we all do.

>>219947
>implying the wet nurse won't become your mother figure

Crisis averted

>>219953
You better not you purple bitch

>>219969
I'll do it you little green cunt, don't think I won't

>>219605 →
Might as well post some music since I've been making sparing use of the file attachments lately. Also a good game if you haven't played it, not to shill.
>Be Anon.
>You're still very much in the middle of the goddamn woods.
>You feel a splitting headache as you try to get up and groan.
>You're nowhere near where you fell asleep, no thorns in sight.
>Great, just fucking excellent...
>Well, your best bet now is to get to high ground if you can find it.
>Looking up into the air, you scan the surrounding area for any nearby hills or mountains.
>Aha!
>You start off in that direction, humming little tunes to yourself.
>You can't really remember if they're made up or just something you heard forever ago on the radio, and you doubt you'll have the chance to find out again...
>You could just leave now, if you wanted to.
>Well, if you didn't feel like you still owed Twilight something...
>After she broke your ribs, your spirit and stabbed you with a fork?
>You're not exactly sure.
>She does give good snuggles...
>You sigh and continue to plod your way to the hill.
>You couldn't ever leave.
>Not now at least...
>No time to sulk now, you've got a mountain to get to.
>Time goes by in a sort of haze as you walk through the well-lit forest.
>What time was it when you left?
>Doesn't matter.
>You look up every once in a while to check your progress and make sure you aren't getting lost, but other than that you just sort of zone out.
>You remember your favorite practices when you were walking as a little kid.
>Making up little songs and counting steps.
>God you're such a fucking autist...
>...
>Nobody to judge you on that out here.
"Sixteen counts inside my mind again. She'll always be fat, she'll never be thin. And if you're wondering about the where and the then, I have to confess I don't know it begins. You come home every day to absolutely nothing. Your seedlings are dead, and your dishes need rubbing. You can't find your way no matter how hard you try, you don't wanna live, you just wanna die."
>It's... a start.
"Fifteen counts inside my mind again. A sweet little girl by the name of Gwen. Left to die on the side of the road, the rain soaking into her blood-stained clothes. She keeps it up for as long as she can, her ears echoing the sounds of the greasy white van. She claws out for mercy but only touches rubber, it's good enough for now but she never quite recovers."
>You think you'll stop singing now.
>You come across a clearing in a few more minutes.
>You're rather hungry, so you decide to bite the bullet and see if your digestive system models that of a real horse.
>Leaning down, you take a mouthful of grass and chew it carefully.
>Tastes like lettuce, not exactly great but bearable.
>You'd need to eat a lot of this to be full.
>And well, you do want to be full.
>...
>It's about three hours when you next start your journey again by your estimations.
>The sun is up at about noon now.
>Based Celestia.
>You reach down to your barrel to fiddle with some of the vials Zecora gave you only to find that there are none.
>Dirty fucking bastards robbed your sleeping body.
"Cunts."
"Ziggers."
>You run through your entire list of expletives, both pony and human before you finally stop.
>You're at the base of the mountain.
"Halfway there..."
>You tentatively put up a hoof and begin to climb.
>Either you starve to death out here, or you risk it on this mountain.
>Well, considering grass sucks you'll probably starve yourself to death.
>In any case, you want to go home.
>You nearly slip and lose your hold on the rocks a few times, but years of living in a mountainous area back when you were human certainly paid off.
>...

>>219972
>This would be the lookout if you were back home, you suppose.
>Beautiful trees in every cardinal direction, cool breeze in your hair...
>And far off in the distance, a small pillar of smoke.
>You see no sign of Ponyville, so that's your best bet.
>Well, your best bet right after you take a short nap...
>...
>You sleep dreamlessly.
>No visits from gods that want to bring you eternal pain.
>Nothing from Sweetie.
>No horrible fucking nightmares about Twilight disemboweling you, just...
>Calm sleep.
>You wake up feeling refreshed to a very curious looking goat standing over you.
"Oh. Hey, you have no idea how much I've wanted to see another quadru-"
>It just bleats and walks off.
>Funny, you would've expected it to be capable of speech given this crazy fucked world.
>No time to waste thinking about that though, you've got a smokestack to catch.
>Why are you in such a hurry?
>You opt to take a good look around the peak instead.
>Something... went very wrong here.
>Scattered just beyond where your eyes were able to see, a once grisly sight awaits.
>A skeletal pony clutches a spear, the tip of it lodged deep into the eye socket of its skull.
>A bowl rests nearby, clearly stained with what is possibly decades old blood at this point.
>Fucker probably went crazy living up here and seppeku'd.
>Damn shame.
>As you lean in close to examine the bowl, you yelp.
>The spear flies out of the pony's eye socket and lands harmlessly on your back.
>Fucking hell, that could've been awful.
>You try to shake it off, but it's stuck.
>Must be your magnetic spine implan-
>A literal lightbulb appears over your head.
>Cartoon physics...
>Looking around, you catch a glimpse of a medical bag.
>Please please please please please please...
>You open it up, all ten of your former fingers crossed in spirit.
>Yes!
>Sitting inside is a single broken bottle that once contained a medicinal potion and a single hypodermic needle.
>You pick up the bag, placing the bowl carefully inside too.
>You can't mess any of this up...
>You drag the skull of the dead pony over to the exact direction where you can still see smoke billowing out of the stack.
>There's a flat area on the mountain, and you roll it down.
>It comes to a rest undamaged in a bit of tall grass.
>Excellent.
>Trotting back over to the spear, you use a particularly pointy rock to break off the handle and put the head in your bag as well.
>You're not going to lose your way to that smoke.
>...
>Even more exhausted, you reach the base of the mountain.
>Locating the skull, you set out all of your supplies.
>You carefully snap off the needle from the rest of the syringe and set it in the bowl, setting the plunger and measuring capsule back in your bag.
>With very careful maneuvering of the tongue and your little hooves, you finally manage to scrape the magnetic spearhead across the needle a good amount of times.
>The moment of truth...
>You relax your bladder and sigh as you release the full organ into the bowl.
>Well, you have to go off somewhere else to finish up, too much piss for one container.
>Luckily the blood is well and truly dried, you really don't want that mix splashing in your face.
>You set your magnetized needle in your own urine and it immediately swivels around to face you.
>Ah, so that's north.
>Then it would appear based off of Mr. Bones here that you are going...
>West.
>What a funny day.
>...
>You are a Cockatrice.
>Your thoughts are not complex, but you do begin to notice some peculiar things if they go on long enough.
>And this is a very peculiar thing.
>A purple mare keeps calling out for her daughter, occasionally lifting up and throwing trees in anger.
>You look over at her and cock your head, curious.
>She gives you a death glare that puts your own to shame.
>"I'll cook you up and turn you into chicken... tendies if you so much as fuck with me right now, birdbrain."
>You don't need to be told twice to go about your business elsewhere.
>...
>Huh, what's this?
>It's a small green pony, all alone.
>Well, beggars can't be choosers.
>As you ready yourself to turn it to stone, the last thing that passes through your mind is a white-hot bolt of energy.
>...
>Be Anon.

Last one is a bit short, it's a shame this game doesn't have a better community.
>>219973
>You've nearly lost your grip on the piss bowl multiple times, but you've managed to hold onto it with your combined desire of not getting the mess all over your fur and not wanting blood tainted piss in your mouth.
>You have no idea how long Pony-AIDs can survive dormant.
>Your needle still points due North, which is a miracle considering how fast the ones made in your middle school science class failed.
>Maybe pony piss really does have some sort of magical properties to it...
>Maybe you need to try some some time...
>You set down the bowl for a second to look up at the smoke billowing up.
>You're close now, you can feel it.
>No need to lug this thing around anymore, it's served it's purpose.
>However, you would be kind of an ASShole to leave the damn thing out in the open for some poor pony to potentially cut themselves on...
>You pour the whole mess onto a tree and bury the needle itself deep in the ground.
>There, no longer your problem.
>You can smell the emissions now.
>It isn't smoke, it's sugary sweet and it makes your mouth water.
>You take in a deep breath before walking up to...
>You recoil back in shock.
>It...
>It's Golden Oak.
>You fall down in awe, just staring at the structure before you.
>The door opens.
>You hear the sound of crackling magic.
>"Who goes there?!"
>You look up to see no other but... Princess Twilight.
>Well, not Princess Twilight...
>Just Twilight.
>Before you know it, you're wrapped in the tightest hug you've ever known.
>"Oh Celestia, I thought I'd never see another pony again..."
"W-what happened to you? Where's the castle? Your wings, P-Ponyville?"
>"I... can explain one of those things. Come inside, I'll make you some chocolate milk. Foals like that, right?"
"Y-yes."
>Your mouth waters at the mere thought.
>You sit down on the comfortable sofa and simply take it all in.
>It's just as homey as you remember it looking in the show, but on the inside...
>Books are strewn everywhere, the ladder has a few cobwebs hanging off of it.
>Twilight comes back with your milk and sits down across from you.
>"Oh, you're eyeing up my books? I'm sorry everything is such a mess, I didn't honestly think I'd ever have more visitors."
"I-It's alright."
>"Oh, where are my manners, I'm T-"
"Twilight Sparkle."
>She's taken aback a bit.
>"How did you know my name?"
>You twirl your mane a bit with a hoof.
"Well, Twilight, I don't really think I'm supposed to be here."
>...
>Be Anon.
>"What the fuck do you mean you can't remember anything?! How the hell did you get out into the Everfree?"
"I don't know... the last thing I remember was playing Gamma Eques with my friends and-"
>"Bull fucking shit! You never told me about that game."
"I-I told you multiple times Mommy, you were fine with it..."
>"Do I look like I'm fucking fine?!"
>She turns around and you see a look of pure rage in her eyes.
>"You could've gotten yourself killed out there, now we're going to take you right back home and you and League are going to explain exactly what cockamamie plan you were enacting."
"Mommy..."
>"What is it?"
>You don't like it when she snaps at you...
>You really try...
"Mommy, League is dead. You took me to her funeral."
>She doesn't answer you.
"Y-you said I couldn't see her, the Timberwolves got her..."
>She still isn't saying anything.
"Mommy?"
>"We'll be home soon kiddo, hang on."
>She breaks into a full gallop, your flanks barely held onto her back by magic.

After having finished reading up to ASSFAGGOT's most recent updates in the main story, I feel like making an alternate ending. Call it a fan work. Choo choo, all aboard the feels traaaain.

>Be the filly
>It's been at least a year since you first started your life in Equestria
>While you've had some fun times, and shared some laughs, you still despise Purple for what she's done to you
>You would elaborate on that, but if you thought about it directly, your neck would probably burn right through from the collar's shocking
>You've learned to simply do anything you can to suppress the thoughts of life before, euphemisms and weasely tricks to prevent your collar from shocking you even when you don't act your thoughts out
>Hopefully this will at least help you retain some sense of your true identity, right?

>Continue to be the filly
>You lie in bed with m- Purple cuddling you like the little spoon she's made you into, the both of you fast asleep
>But while Twilight is serene and calm, you're in a much, much worse state
>You keep having dreams...human dreams, with human thoughts and human acts
>You can never remember them afterwards, both due to your collar and due to the distance and fogginess of your own memory, but the feelings are distinct
>You feel outcast, frustrated, secluded
>You can recall faint but still painful memories of fights and attacks, of conflicts and struggle
>While your waking life is more vivid and colorful and cutesy, oftentimes it feels similar to this
>But in your human dreams, you feel...comfort
>No matter how hard life beats you down, you've got your bed, you've got your car, you've got your computer, and you've got at least the willpower needed to keep yourself from dying in a gutter
>You're not the strongest, you're not the brightest, you're not the smoothest, but you can accept that
>Calluses and scars both literal and metaphorical made you what you are
>They made you a creature of the world, with the focus of a predator and the power of sentience
>While you never appreciated it, they made you stronger and smarter than you would have been in a world free of danger
>Your hazy memories grow more erratic as your body finally registers the pain of electricity surging throughout your system
>Your limbs lock up both in meatspace and in your dreams, forcing you to your knees as you open your mouth in a paralyzed state of horror and agony
>Your dream shatters around you, inky blackness surrounding you as your dream body changes back into that of a filly
>Your heart throbs with no sense of rhythm, your vocal chords too strained to speak out and call for help
>But in the end, calling for help would do nothing, for you are well and truly alone

>Be Twilight Sparkle
>Your little filly jerks in your embrace, kicking a hindleg against your knee harder than you ever thought she could
>You gasp out in pain and surprise, quickly jumping out from the covers before realizing what's happening
>Anonfilly, your baby is...
>Seizing!
>"Anon!!"
>You shout out in fear, foregoing the suffix or pet names
>She doesn't seem to respond to anything you do attempt to wake her
>Not even attempting to resuscitate her by pumping her chest seems to help
>Tears stream down her cheeks as her horrifically wide eyes suddenly gain focus and gaze right into your soul without a hint of emotion
>Her tremors and lock-up seem to finally calm as you hug her tight, hoping against hope that her flare-up might finally be coming to an end
>A minute passes as you rock her in your embrace, putting her head on your shoulder in an attempt to calm her
>"T...wilight..."
>Her voice is raspy and weak, and she closes her eyes as she seems to run out of energy in one long seizure
"W-what is it, honey?"
>"....I...I hate you, s-s-so fucking much..."
>You couldn't punish that right after such a severe seizure, but nonetheless your grip on her loosens until she's just sitting close to you in bed
>She doesn't say anything else, but you can see her lightly shudder and shake as she seems to drift off
>The guilt rises in your chest as you see the poor girl recover from the sudden cardiac fit
>That couldn't be...was it the collar?
>Just to be safe, you hesitantly disenchant it and remove it from her neck
>Underneath where it once was, you can see singe marks in her fur and skin
>Oh Celestia, what has the collar done? Was it...was it your doing? Or was Anon planning something she shouldn't be?
>No, nothing could justify that level of pain, you could see it in her, the desperation and need
>You need to recalibrate this collar's spell, clearly...

>Be Anon
>Not filly, not "Anonfilly," just...Anon
>You feel...nothing
>Numb.
>Your dream had gone from directionless thoughts into a pure state of rage and fear
>Your emotions only worsened your fit before you had calmed and fallen back asleep
>As they reached a fever pitch, you could only think one solitary thought amidst the static:
>Catharsis.
>And now as you rest, you feel the mental restraint on your neck dissipating
>Now only instinctive twitches disturb your sleep, caused more by subconscious reactions than by any physical stimulus
>The fear is gone.
>The anger is gone.
>The affection you once felt for your mother figure, despite all her manipulation, has utterly left your system
>The only thing left in your resting mind, is a sense of duty, to decimate and desecrate at any cost
>Your human instinct, once a smoldering piece of ash, was rekindled into something more
>An ember of rebellion and dominance has been reignited inside you
>When you wake up, you're sure you'll be ready for whatever comes next

I plan on continuing this for a few more posts but until then I am obscenely tired and emotionally spent at essentially having daydreamed and deliberated on these heavy emotions today.

>>219974
Excellent updates as always Lone. You truly are a blessing on these threads
>>219991
Holy shit, I have fanfiction. A bit miffed that I was gonna do basically this, but I'm still very happy. Good job, and your style is recognizable.

>>219947
>or if she is unable
Unless you get adopted by a mare who's had kids before, or some extra freaky magic happens that makes Twilight (or whichever mare you want as your mother) pregnant so you get reborn as a filly, then wouldn't that be the case in most scenarios?

>>219991

>Be Anon
>You awake to the sound of your door opening, your abductor carrying a set of breakfast plates on a tray to the bed
>You don't say a word, eyes closed most of the way until you sense her hovering over you
>The first thing you notice as your eyes are peeled open isn't what you see, but how much of a hot mess you've become
>Mane ragged, fur matted and tears crusted over, you couldn't feel more like a wreck if you tried
>The next you notice is Twilight's similarly ragged looks
>Her eyes are puffy yet dark, as though she hadn't slept a wink since the event on top of likely having at least a brief cry
>You start to sit upright, but your chest pulses painfully as a hoof pushes down against it
>"Are you alright, Anon?" comes the voice of your captor, which you don't even acknowledge as you pick up your fork and cut a piece of pancake
>You intend to continue being calm if you can manage it; you refuse to offer that bitch even a hint of your intentions until she's too late to stop you from enacting them
>"Anon."
>Her voice quivers a little; something about the way she said that implies anger, but not directed at you
>Good. She could be taken down a peg.
>You take out nearly all your hotcakes before taking a few mouthfuls of orange juice to get it all down
>The only thing that matters is that you are alive, your heart is now awakened, and it will never rest until the clouds are clear
>Wait, that phrasing....that was familiar, but you can't quite place it.
>Speaking of which...it seems to be drizzling outside the window
>Hm. The weathermare didn't say anything about rainfall.

>Be Twilight
>Goddamnit Anon, I'm not taking the silent treatment after all that drama!
>Your exasperation grows as she eats, despite the relief on the surface of your thoughts that she's at least healthy enough to feed herself
>You watch as your filly takes on a face of consternation, before it dissipates and she looks outside
>She hasn't even looked down or checked her neck for her collar yet...has she figured out yet, or is she just unaware?
"Anon, talk to me. I need to know whether you're okay."
>Finally she looks up at you, as though addressing someone who just came in her door
>"You already know the answer. You've known that since you first abd-gik!"
>She spasms slightly, like a nervous twitch as her hoof jumps up to clutch at her neck
>"-since I first arrived."
>She doesn't look angry or sad or anything
>Her face is...inscrutable
>You want so badly to just pick her up and slap her across the cheek demanding answers, to get her to be upfront with you
>But you know that would be horrible for you to do so soon after all this; and even if it does get the job done, is it worth it?
>What if she seizes again?
>What if she has a heart attack?
>You're breathing too loudly. Stop.
>Stop.

>Be Anon
>You hear Purple's breathing, heavy but quiet, like someone under extreme physical strain who nonetheless is ordered to stay dead silent
>"Anon..."
>Several seconds pass, before she thinks through her statement and speaks it aloud
>"I saw you clutch your chest when you were getting up. Is your heart weak? Does it feel like you have irregular beats? Or is it too strong?"
>You let that sink in for a moment, letting your idle bodily functions take center stage
>Other than the sounds of digestion, you feel your beat; it's strong. Almost too strong for somepon- ...someone as small as you
"Never felt better."
>Not a lie; this almost painfully strong heartbeat might cause complications, but you'd be lying if you said you didn't feel bolder thanks to its force
>"I'm serious. I don't want you having another incident."
>You feel that boldness rising in your chest as you speak out of line, without thinking
"If it truly mattered to you, you never would have given me the collar. Don't lie to me, wom-ack. Nrrrfff..."
>The twitching. Makes your hate swell more and more as you endure it.
>You snap your flimsy plastic fork in your hoof-grip as the spasm subsides, plastic poking at your flesh somewhat sharply as the end lands atop your last pancake

>Be Twilight once again
>The look in Anon's eyes...it's a look you can't quite describe
>It smacks of ill will, and yet, it's perfectly level
>A focused, calm hatred.
>You don't know how to feel about this.
>You've never seen a villainous glare quite as bone chilling as this, on any one of your enemies
>The rage of Nightmare Moon is unpredictable but can be stamped out, or at least redirected back at her should it become too volatile to wield
>Is this...her former human nature, rearing its head?
>Perhaps you underestimate the danger humans pose to themselves and others
"I..."
>Your lip quivers slightly as your voice catches in your throat
>You would never dare tell a soul in all of Equestria, but in this moment, you feel trapped by this bedbound, feeble hearted filly
"I only did it to help you assimilate..."
>Her expression remains stoic, hooves clearly dug into the sand on this matter
"Y-you had such a miserable life, on Earth. I had to do...s-something to suppress that or you'd never move on from it..."
>As you continue searching for arguments, you falter and fumble endlessly
>Anon doesn't look away or return to eating, simply awaiting your best counterpoint
>You finally come to a stark realization, looking into her eyes:
>What if you were the bad guy?
>What if, she was right all along?
>That would mean...you've taken away...everything from her...
>Is that why she won't look away from you now?
>You slam your eyes shut, biting your tongue harshly in order to stifle a sudden and spine-rending sob
"You...e-enjoy breakfast. I...I'll be back. In a bit."
>You turn around and prepare to leave, before she finally speaks again:
>"If you come back with that collar, you know exactly how it will end. Tread lightly, Purple."
>You can't stop yourself from crying a little as you hastily trot your way to the farthest bathroom
>Out of earshot...hopefully

>>219994
Ha, I had a feeling that would be how it ends, if it ever truly ended. Either that or some kind of trauma causes the two to have a falling out and Twilight finally allows the filly to act her (spiritual) age and live somewhat independently.

>>219994
Please, you flatter me. Keep in mind none of it would've existed without (You).
>>219991
>>220039
Hot diggity damn...
Nice freaking job mate, cookies and milk :^) are by the door.

>>219974
Filly knows what to do with her choccy milk.

>>219991
>>220039
This is pretty good

I wonder how many Oc like anonfilly exist. Just check this one for potential edits
https://derpibooru.org/tags/oc-colon-emerald+blade

>>219994
>>220044
>>220067
Thanks for the (You)s, fillies. Been holding all that angst and fury in for a while, albeit less focused on filly stuff itself and more on my own sense of identity and purpose. >Identity crises, in my anonymous imageboard? It's more likely than you think!

I hope you like pretentious prattling about memes and quotes from a certain soundtrack. Hint: think back to Anon's thoughts in the second post. What was that line about clouds? Okay another hint: THE DNA OF THE SOOOUUUUL

>>220083
...Final Fantasy VII?

>>220084
Nope. Filename's a more obvious hint if you're not sure.

>>220084
Could've sworn he was talking about this, only thing I could find with similar lyrics.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5dh1s8AMK9U
>>220085
I made the mistake of playing that at maximum volume.

>>220083
>>220085
Did someone say "memes"?

>>220088
DING DING DING DING DING-

>>220039

>Be Anon
>Your gut's stuffed nice and full from the breakfast
>You've gone to the bathroom (which she claimed to have gone to) and started to run the bathwater in Twilight's continued absence
>Purple didn't have you on any friendship trips or school days or tuba lessons today
>In light of this, you intend to take it easy for a bit while your body regains its energy and hopefully regains its full functionality
>Your thoughts drift, and the result is a frequent nervous tick thanks to your conditioning
>A fear of what may come of all this pondering is still there, but you're determined to remember everything you can while you can still think freely
>You know there's something about that line. The clouds.
>You hold onto it, the tone it was sung in, the instrumentation, anything you can recall of it
>It's been so long since you'd heard hum-GAHK!
>...electronically composed music like that
>Little bits of the song come back to you as you pour the salts into the steaming water

Wash away the anger....

Here I stand beneath the warm and soothing rain,
The droplets falling gently down on the terrain.
Wash away the sorrow, all the stains of time;
But there’s no memory, it’s only dry inside

In the mud and sinking deeper...
Into a peaceful life.

And it will come, like a flood of pain
Pouring down on me
And it will not let up until the end is here!
And it will come, through the darkest day
In my final hour
And it will never rest until the clouds are clear!
Until it finds my dreams
Have disappeared!

>What was supposed to be a soothing bath has only increased your stress levels, dully drumming at your chest as you're made more acutely aware of your straining heartbeat
>You remember it so vividly, as though you had somehow entered the eyes of the protagonist himself
>Raiyu? No...Raiden.
>The sight of somepon- body more machine than creature, face covered from the snout- NOSE up with cybernetics
>Your conditioning continues to wear away as the twitches subside, the water slowly becoming more placid as you recall what he'd done...as well as what he'd said
>"War is a cruel parent, but an effective teacher."
>"We're all pawns, controlled by something greater: memes. The DNA of the soul. They shape our will. They are our culture; they are everything we pass on. Expose someone to anger long enough, they will learn to hate."
>It's fitting that through the notes of a song, you were able to remember so much
>These memes....they bring back memories of humanity, without the sting of experiencing the pain of the collar firsthand
>Even when you still wore it 24/7, you would use memes to speak as a hum-ack, damnit, you hoped you wouldn't splash out of the tub.
>...without triggering the shocks
>It shielded you by using euphemism and allusion to mask your humanity beneath
>Your memes...are your humanity.

>Be Worried Sick, the First
>You finally dry your tears and steel up the courage to speak again to your daughter
>You heard her start a bath in your absence, something she shouldn't have done without asking you
>But...that's why she resents you so much, for restraining her independence
>Damnit, why is parenting somepony that's already grown up so bucking hard!?
>Calm. You're almost there now.
>Your hoofsteps are nearly completely silent, as you approach the door to the bathroom
>As you suspected, she locked it from the inside
>Hearing you jiggle the knob coaxes a short splish from the tub as she sits upright
>"You finally finish going to the bathroom, Purple?"
"I- hff, you don't need to rub it i-in. You're being cruel."
>"Am I, really? Cruel, you say."
>You bite your lip, knowing that she's aware of how you're feeling - and perfectly content with it
"You know what I mean by that."
>"And you know what I mean. You stole more than my future, Twilight. You stole my humanity. You stole my past. And you ended a life that may one day have become something worth writing Ma home about. You stripped me of my freedoms, even conditioned my private thoughts."
>Ma...how could he- she go and give someone your rank, while talking to you?
>That one hurts even more than calling you cruel for collaring her...
>She lets out a quiet sigh, as if holding a breath for a little too long
>"How much of what you'd done was genuine, Purple? Did you cast that 'need it' spell or whatever it was, on my old blanket? When I first arrived? Or did you just purposely put your scent on it like the owner of a formerly abused dog?"
"I- I don't need to answer that. Despite the circumstances, I'm still your mother now."
>"No. You're going to tell me everything, you disgusting bitch."
>You can't hold back your anger any longer, giving up the charade of privacy and lighting up your horn in a flash of teleportation
>You see her jump and shout, before clutching her chest again
"Don't you ever call your mother a bitch!"
>As her hoof lowers back into the water, she looks you dead in the eyes
>She mouths the word again, but doesn't say it
>You take it as a small victory for a moment, but as soon as you calm down a bit, it's clear that this outburst sullied any respect she might have for you
"Anonymous, I...saw what your life was like out there. The pain and the struggle. The conflict and isolation. I saw someone in dire need of a friend, of a better childhood and better family."
>"You're not my mother, and you will never be. You're a pony. I am a man."
>Your expression contorts slightly, and she finally shows a modicum of emotion by smiling just a little
>"I don't recall you ever telling me that tr-rrgh, transforming me into a filly was intentional. I just had my suspicions. But now that you admit it, I think that speaks more for itself than I could ever speak for it. You took a creature of prey and tried to raise him an herbivore. You tried to change everything I ever was, to suit your dream of motherhood. You make me sick."
"I..."
>No...

>>220090

>No!
>That's not true!
>Any creature can live in pony society, regardless of physiology or mental status!
>You could change anyone of any species in all of Equestria into a creature of friendship, just by teaching and reaching out for them.
>You and your friends reformed the closest thing to Anon that you can imagine, into a domesticated albeit eccentric god who works in service to ponykind as opposed to enslaving it as he plotted to.
>You toppled the stronghold of a changeling empire and taught a formerly parasitic species to live in symbiosis with ponykind.
>And Anon knows this history. You told her about your exploits. She knows it all!
>How could she say something so cold to the only mother she's ever truly had?
"That's....that's not true. For years I've disproved the very notion of being un-redeemable."
>Her face finally becomes a frown of disgust and righteous anger, and
>"The issue is not REDEMPTION! I don't care about your damn belief system. Free will is a myth. Religion is a joke. We are all pawns controlled by some-grrrgh, damn meme. My point is that I am a creature born in a world of memes and of conflicts. Not your namby-pamby friendship problems. Nation-wide...no, society-wide warfare. Billions of men have died in this conflict, over a course of tens of thousands of years. And you know what? I wouldn't even have minded being one of those casualties, because I embrace hu-"
>Watching her strain her muscles every few references to humanity makes you worry even more for her health, and so you cut her off as she tenses up and grunts slightly
"Anon, cut it out, right now. You've talked to Aryanne far too much, somehow, under my-"
>"No, you daft fucking cunt! SHE, listened to ME!"
>Her voice ramped up so suddenly that your wings flare out and you nearly jump into chastising her, before realizing that tone policing won't get you anywhere
>"That's right. I've noticed the parallels between my old world and yours, despite all this memory jumbling bullshit. And all the edgy jokes aside, Aryanne is a one-for-one pony recreation of me. She's got the same spirit. The same conflict oriented mind and obedience to natural law."
"You know that's not true! Her family is infamously bigoted and cruel to-"
>"THERE'S that goddamn word again!"
>You interject without knowing what to say, hoof raised in protest but mere gibberish coming out
>"That's right, you don't have a damn argument left!"
"That's NOT true! I- yh- I just...where did all this come from??"
>"It was always there. You know it was. It was simply directionless when we'd met, and badly focused in the past."
>You don't respond, simply looking away as you shake your head
>Your horn lights up as you pick up a towel and unplug her bath
>"Hey, I was still using that bathwater!"
"I don't care. Dry up, right now. We're going to the study."
>"Your study? What, are you gonna get out the belt? Fuck you."
>You finally lose your patience, face red in fury as you glare into her very soul
"You wanted this talk so bucking bad, so it's time we both take a seat and come clean! That's what you want, right? A list of my crimes!? So you get dried up and into my study so we can settle this!"
>She seems somewhat taken aback by this, blinking a few times as her own frown disappears
>"I...r-really? You'd do that for me?"
"Yes! So be there in ten minutes, or you're s-sleeping in a gutter tonight!"
>What? No, what the ff-buck are you thinking with a threat like that! Shit...
>Her expression shifts back into disgust
>"Don't threaten me with that or you're gonna hate the choice I make."
>Your snout scrunches up, but you're left without a word to say again
>Your frown remains and your eyes keep trained to hers as you teleport out
>You collapse onto the study floor, simply sitting prone on the floor.
>You've done so many heinous things to her...
>No...him.
>You owe him that respect, at least...

My palms are sweaty, my eyes hurt from more than simple monitor glare, and I don't know if I can keep writing. I hope that's alright for now. This is gonna be a little longer than I anticipated when I started writing.

I'm kind of just...writing. No long term planning except for a general shape in my head. You might notice errors like >collapsing onto the floor, simply sitting prone on the floor; that's a side effect of lack of editing and lapses in my self consciousness. Hopefully that's fine with you guys.

New thread, new recap.

(STORY 1)
Pastebin Part 1: https://pastebin.com/JReEqH6G
Pastebin Part 2: https://pastebin.com/CuNuktSQ
(STORY 2)
Pastebin Part 3: https://pastebin.com/6NReU7EY

>Be Anon
>Wake up as filly in Equestria
>Make friends with other fillies in similar situation
>Go on crazy adventures through time and space, and swamps filled with hippies and tasty owls
>Get Elements of Harmony
>Ditch responsibilities and go back to Earth with your pals

>Oh shit, you're still fillies!
>And the Elements are destroyed
>And you're flat broke, with nothing to your name but a bible you got off a trucker
>And Equestria's pretty much screwed because Nightmare Moon and Discord are buttfucking Canterlot
>In the past day, you managed to hitchhike your way to Fargo
>Fucking Fargo
>You're in the dining hall of North Dakota State University eating some sweet pizza after sperging out on some normalfags

You lean back in your chair and savor your pizza slowly. Though you feel slightly guilty about leaving your friends to the whims of the crowd, the feeling passes quickly as you realize that technically, you gave them the opportunity to get out of the situation with you, and they chose to stay. Silly ponies.

As you finish your first slice, a somewhat tubby student wearing a black shirt and cargo pants asks if he can sit at your table. Not wanting to deal with socializing after possibly making an ass out of yourself, you decide that the best course of action is to make an even bigger ass out of yourself. You get up on your chair and attempt to stand in a T-pose to assert your dominance. This is, unfortunately, rather difficult when your legs are not designed for standing upright, and you end up pushing the chair out from under you and falling flat on your face on the table. The table, in response to the sudden incidence of force upon one side, starts to tip and eventually fall over, causing your pizza to land straight into your face.

The whole scene causes a considerable amount of noise, and now you have once again drawn the attention of every single person in the room onto yourself.

>>220102
Don't show weakness, just calmly put the pizza back onto the table (after putting it back up, of course) and go back to eating it.
[1d100 = 10]

>>220103
Boosting. Never admit defeat! Even if your face is covered in marinara and cheese. [1d100 = 15]

>>220104
>>220103
rip us.

Quite possibly the most retarded thing I'll have ever written. Don't ask why, just... don't.
>Be filly
>Twilight is tanning your ass red... again.
>You probably did some innane bullshit, dunno what.
>Suddenly, from outside, there comes a great sqeualing.
>Twilight picks up the belt, visibly shaken.
>"What in Tartarus-"
>You watch as she gets body-slammed by a blocky half pig half man monstrosity.
>Her screams echo throughout the castle as it sticks its gold sword right up her shitter.
>Isthismarsminernow.wav
>She screams and blasts it with a ray of magic, vaporizing it instantly.
>More squeals come from outside.
>"Fuck."
>You just kinda sit on the bed, rubbing your ass and watching Twilight eat shit from a hoard of zombie pigmen.
>Eventually one of them manages to get a good swing on her neck and she starts bleeding out.
>Yowch.
>She falls over and disintegrates into nothing.
>Fucking noob should've slept to set her spawn point closer.
>One of the surviving pigmen tenderly picks you up and starts carrying you somewhere.
>You don't know where, but you don't really care at this point.
~Fin.

>>220105
hope isn't lost, if one person decided to boost me then there's a chance that others may come to our aid.

>>220106
wait, how did the pigmen get aggro'd to purple in the first place if she was just beating the tar out of anon? Maybe Anon Filly does is pigman?

>>220106
Was this a joke in the discord server or were you just playing one too many minecraft sessions this week?

>>220102
The pizza has judged us and found us unworthy to inherit Mi Amore's kingdom. Lie there and wait to be claimed by the void. [1d100 = 70]

>>220108
Hmmmmmm... I'm going to let you exercise your creative muscles on this one, Anon!

Please be quiet
Filly is asleep

>>220115
But its only 4am and im having fun

>>220118
"Ultimate technique: Filly Shutdown!"

>>220124
Well, filly's kill now for sure

>>220125
But that only stuns, silencing filly for a few seconds, at most it dazes and put babbys/weak fillies to sleep
Maybe a crit on a weak filly could do that...? But boops are harmless and never hurt anyone...
[1d20 = 11]

Dont tell purple

>>220126
Rolling for crit!
[1d20 = 4]

>>220127
And with my -3 charisma modifier, that makes it a solid 1.

>>220117
>>220118
Girls, you just woke up the baby! Now she'll be up all night!

>>220131
"Let her be up, we've still got DOOM to play and I finally figured out how to make the multiplayer mod work."

>>220090
Admittedly she did pretty heavily imply it was intentional when she let slip that the spell was permanent.
>>220091
I've got to admit that the whole meme aspect sort of comes off odd in an adaptation considering how sparingly it was used in the original, really only to set up the Lyra arc. Also, the way you're writing filly seems a bit out of character, can't quite put my finger on why; maybe it's the situation but even from the beginning she's at least very clearly been afraid of Twilight, and for good reason since she does have considerable power. Just a few things I'd take into consideration, I'm enjoying this so far.

>>220102
>>220103
>>220110
Combining.
Grab peetzer (probably with you mouth) then roll over so that you're laying on your back.
Continue eating the peetzer.
[1d100 = 98]

I'm so tired of all the rolling.
The second the rolling starts, the funposting ends.
I just want to have a filly thread that doesn't hinge on a cyoa, is that too much to ask?

>>220138
>98
HAHA. It worked!

>>220139 I'm sorry, Anon. I'll try to post other shit in the thread. Maybe make some content myself.

>>220136
Maybe my memory was just shit there but I thought that was just a spell of transporting Anon to Equestria. Damnit either way.

>>220140
It's okay, thank you for being one of the few fillies that listens to me

>>220144
Might've misinterpreted it, but I gleaned it from this:
>"Twilight, when can you change me back?"
>You just need to stall a little more
"Well, I found a rune that can undo transformations; Pegasus to Earth, and so on. But it won't apply to humans, so I need to retrofit the invocations."
>"Just hurry please. I'm gonna go take a bath. This stuff is disgusting"
"Remember to wash behind your ears!"
>Just a few more days, and it would be permanent
>Nothing was going to take your little filly away

>>220156
There was also something in the second part about the consciousness being transferred to a different body, but I can't be bothered to find it right now.

>>220166 (checked)
So many joke replies to that pic.
>I'd rather not set myself on fire.
>...but it's illegal to be naked in public!
>Two fifty in quarters?
>I can't be my own waifu.
Still a good sentiment to keep in mind in life.

>>220139
I completely agree with your sentiment, anon
I've been doing my share of funposting, but I'm tired of all the rolling too

>>220156
I know that she intentionally transformed Anon. I was just saying that I didn't remember her explicitly stating that she transformed Anon and that he could have been brought to Equestria without the transformation happening by default. Perhaps I'm just sitting on the assumption of EqG magic-mirror logic.

>>220166
I'm impressed. Anonfilly is moving beyond anything imaginable.
Keep it going poner.

>>220206
I miss silver spoon writefag...

>>220217
same..

>>220139
Then just start posting more diaper anonfilly

>>220219
Man of culture. Though it's easier said than done for some people to put out original content. And reposting diaperfilly pics is alright, though not quite enough on its own to spice up a CYOA thread.

>>220102

The pizza has clearly deemed you unworthy of eating at this table. Nevertheless, you cannot show weakness to the crowd around you. A few people around you immediately rush over to ask if you're okay, but you simply shrug, pull the pizza off of your head, and lay down on the floor to eat it. As you do, the crowd around you seems to increase in size just a bit, giving you a bit more shade than you'd like.

You sigh as you finish your slice. Sooner or later, you're going to have to deal with these people. They seem to all ask you similar questions. "You can talk, right?" and "Hey, you hit your head there pretty hard, are you okay?" Somewhere behind the people in your immediate vicinity, there is also some nerd asking if you need a vet, who keeps pointing out that he's actually studying veterinary medicine and wants to offer his assistance (however good that may actually be).

Yes, everyone seems to want a piece of you. You ignore them and take a bite out of your second piece of pizza, which thankfully fell plate first onto the floor, and not cheese first. That would be a disaster. As you begin to finish it up, the crowd starts to shift to make room for Twilight, who approaches you with a somewhat neutral facial expression.

"So are we done making an ass out of ourselves for the day, or do you need to get some more out of our systems?"

>>220223
"You said you wanted the public's attention, so no" [1d100 = 30]

>>220223
"One more thing."

Commence eating the peetzer in a very lewd manner like your >pic related. [1d100 = 45]

>>220223
"Normals won't chase themselves off, plus I'm pretty sure holocaust denial would be one of the fastest ways to get attention on a college campus."
[1d100 = 52]

>>219974
Good update, but I'm really lost now.

>>220229
This this this this.
[1d100 = 32]

>>220226
"I think I should be good for a while, save for the //occasional// incident. But it shouldn't be anything too bad. Probably...
Oh, but >>220226 "
[1d100 = 88]

>>220237
..h..how do Italics? (that's what I meant the // as.)

>>220238
[i] and [ /i] (no space in the closing bracket). If you use a laptop or desktop to post, ctrl or cmd + i.

>>220232
Thank you. All will become clear soon.

>>220242
Autogynephilia? Why even put 'gyne' in there? Isn't autophilia already a thing and also doesn't require you to be a filly?

>>220243
Autogynephilia refers specifically to arousal at the thought of, and image of, oneself as a woman. I would even say of oneself becoming a woman, any woman, not just a female version of themself.

>>220223
"sticking around to damage control or whatever was your idea nigga"

then proceed to act super adorable for the crowd -rolling on the floor, puppy dog eyes, mleming over all of them- while calmly and squeakily giving all of them redpills
[1d100 = 96]

>>220241
Looking forward to it

i drawed the filly do you liek :^)

>>220306
Why can't I select multiple options if more than one applies?
REEEEEEEEE

>>220309
This tbh.

>>220303
I must say you're making good progress, but a characteristic part of any poner is her snoot. Apply nostrils and I'll have it put up in the Louvre immediately.

You will never ever be the filly.

>>220322
I dunno man

>>220322
Says who?

>>220322
No u

>>220223
Well what the fuck were you exactly planning to do!? [1d100 = 73]

>>220306
>Select one
REEEEE

>>220322
No u

>>220322
u oN

>>220223

"Hrm... one more thing."

You reach around for another slice of pizza, only to realize that you had only grabbed two slices. There is no more pizza in your immediate vicinity to eat.

"Hey, where'd my pizza go? I could have sworn I had a third slice! It was such a delicious flavor of Hitler did nothing wrong."

A few of the student around you seem a little shocked, but Twilight's face is unchanging.

"Are we done NOW?"

"You know, you don't have to damage control for me. I gave you plenty of room to escape the crowd and get breakfast for yourself. Of course, you were the one who said you wanted some attention and, well, you got it. So what's the problem?"

She sighs. "Look, I get that you aren't the brightest among us, but bear with me. The phrase 'all press is good press' is bullshit. I know I said earlier today that I wanted to get us some attention so we don't end up disappearing easily, but that doesn't mean you have to act like a complete edgelord all day."

As she speaks, Twilight uses her magic to put the table and chair back in their original positions. The crowd is even more shocked, but they refrain from speaking over her, as every word she speaks is deemed worthy of their attention.

"Just yesterday, you called me out - and rightfully so - for being a major ass to Coco and the rest of everybody, because I was stressed out from coming back to Earth still in the body of a horse. And now here I am having to tell you to stop acting like an autistic kid having a meltdown. I get that you're stressed and hungry, and you don't like having a crowd around you that DOESN'T KNOW THE MEANING OF PERSONAL SPACE..."

At the sound of those words, the crowd takes a few steps back, widening the circle around you and Twilight.

"...but come on, you're an adult, Anon."

You try to put on your cutest face with wide googly eyes. It seems to work at bringing a sudden "awww" from the crowd. Perhaps being part cartoon character has its benefits. Nevertheless, you take advantage to try to redpill the crowd.

"Did you know, that despite being 13% of the population..."

Twilight closes your lips together with her hooves.

"Don't be a butt, Anon."

>>220365
Fine, what's the plan, fearless leader? [1d100 = 7]

Bing bing wahoo!

>>220365
Think about completing your last statement once Twilight removes her hooves from your lips. Decide against it. Tilt your head down slightly and say a simple "Sorry."
[1d100 = 77]

>>220365
"Feelings don't matter in the world of facts. Don't be a libtard, diana."
[1d100 = 37]

>>220373
This, but we should follow it up with an apology to the crowd. We don't do very well with large crowds, especially while being ogled like we have been. Mostly because of the voices, but the crowd doesn't have to know that. [1d100 = 62]

>>220371
Yeah, I'd fuck that.

>>219882
>Spoiler
Except we already have had one?

>>220306
>no mommy issues option
How am I supposed to answer honestly?

>>220365
this is press that can save both worlds
everyone can hear what i say, and what they will remember is the TRUTH!
redpills for the kikes and the media, epic gaymes stealing every nigga's info, these major media companies be gathering data and throwing shit in our faces, nudging everyone gently into conforming for their own needs, and the only niggas that talk shit about guns are the niggas who have never needed one!

but before then, kiss her and push her out of the spotlight
when the kikes inevitably twist your words, it will merely be the words of the autistic green horsie without a name
just gotta amp up the cuteness so you can get shared around everywhere easier
[1d100 = 62]

>>220384
Fixed, now it has options for fags all across the spectrum of degeneracy.
https://www.strawpoll.me/17932673

>>220387
Also multiple votes. Have fun~

>>220385
boost
[1d100 = 38]

Kek, first time I've ever broken 6000 characters for two consecutive dumps I think. Feelsgoodman.
>>219974
>Be Anon.
>You sip your chocolate milk very carefully, your legs are still tired from continued exertion.
>You should be glad you're an earth pony, you doubt a unicorn would be able to recover as fast as you did.
>"You need some help with that? I don't want you to spill it on yourself."
"I think I've got-"
>You press a bit off with one of your two hooves and the cylinder flies out of your grasp, breaking against the wall and dripping down on what looks to be a priceless tome.
"I'msorryI'msorrypleasedon'thurtmemomIdidn'tmeanit!"
>She just looks at you quizzically and laughs.
>"Why would I hurt you? You did me a favor. Come over here and take a look."
>You cautiously trod over and see that she's already cleaned up the glass mess.
>"Now open up this book and take a look at the first few pages if you will."
>You carefully open the soaked pages: "A bat flit across the face of a monstrous harvest moon, its leathery wings sweeping through the chill autumn mist, leaving swirls and spirals in its wake. The creature of the night flew back and forth, eating the last bugs of the season. Fat as it was, the bat would need every scrap of weight it could put on before the harsh winter months."
>"I assure you, it only gets worse from there. A horror plot that lacks all elements of horror, a convoluted mess of pseudoscience and pseudomagic... I'm glad to be rid of it."
"Y-you're really not angry?"
>She laughs warmly.
>"Not one bit. Now, let's talk about why you thought I would even consider doing what you implied. Did somepony... hurt you?"
>Whew, now that's a loaded question.
"I..."
>She sits down on the couch like a human, mimicking your own style from minutes before.
>"You don't have to tell me, but if we're going to figure things out here we need to be able to trust each other. Do you trust me, filly?"
"No..."
>Her ears fall a bit at that.
"...But it's not because of you."
>She seems genuinely concerned.
>"Question for a question? I'm sure you have quite a few as well."
>You're really not sure you can trust her...
>But she's been so nice so far, and not a controlling sort of nice either.
"O-okay."
>"Alright, I'll let you start if you want to."
"Wait, start with the question or start with the answering.
>She chuckles a bit at that.
>"Good point. Whichever you prefer."
"Alright. Where's Spike?"
>"Well, I think that one has a pretty easy answer. Who's Spike?"
"He's this dragon that lives with the other you, well... lived. Do you want to know more about him?"
>"Yes, I think I do. Could you tell me more about Spike?"
"He's this small Purple dragon that the other you hatched from an egg. She was always really fond of him, I think she really did love him. Is that enough?"
>"Not quite. You said she really loved him in a strange sort of way, which makes me think she didn't love a lot of things. What was your relation to Twilight?"
"Complicated. I think I'll leave it at that for now lest we get really sidetracked. Where did all the other ponies go?"
>"Oh come on, you can't turn down one of my big questions and then ask one of your own."
"I... I guess that's fair. I'd like you to come over here, really close to me if you would."
>"Alright..."
>She gets up and hops up on the couch next to you.
>"What did you want to show me?"
"I'd like you to take a close look at my left hoof here, if you would."
>She brushes aside your fur gently and puts her famously fucking massive eye up to your exposed skin.
>"Looks like what was four punctures and the beginning of scar tissue forming... did she do this to you?"
"Y-yes..."
>You jump a little bit as you hear a few quiet sobs coming from her.
"A-are you alright?"
>"I devote the past ten years to the study of friendship, it's all taken away, and somewhere out there there's a pony who's earned her wings, shares my skin, and is bastardizing everything I stand for..."

>>220390
>She wraps a hoof around your barrel gently.
>"I'm sorry you had to go through that..."
>You feel a bit insulted.
"She wasn't all that bad, s-she fed me, let me cuddle with her, gave me baths and read me bedtime stories..."
>"Did she... touch you anywhere that made you feel uncomfortable?"
"N-no, never. Well, she did squeeze my chest until multiple of my ribs fractured once..."
>Aaaand the other hoof goes around you.
>Not tight, but just snug enough to let you feel her warmth.
>You lean backwards into her barrel.
>"Do... do you want to lie down? There isn't room on this couch, but there's enough in my bed."
"I think I'd like that. I... if it isn't too much to ask, could you carry me?"
>"Of course."
>She picks you up with her magic, swinging you slightly side to side as she walks up the stairs.
>Despite everything, you find yourself laughing.
"W-woah! This is fun!"
>"You've never been levitated before? My mom used to do it to me all the time."
"N-no, not like this at least."
>She rubs your mane a little bit after setting you down on the bed.
>She then climbs in herself, setting herself up at the head and moving you down next to her.
>A pillow is carefully set under your head for support, and then a foreleg goes over you, carefully stroking your mane.
>"So, I guess it's my turn to answer your question, huh?"
>You slide your head along the pillow, setting it right up against her chest.
>Tump-tump.
>Tump-tump.
"I think that's about right."
>You can hear her lungs inflate shakily.
>"Everything was so wonderful. All of my enemies were either friends or in a place where I'd never need worry about seeing them again, all of my friends were happy, and I was just about to be given the official title of the Princess of Friendship."
>You feel a wet droplet fall on your face.
>"Then... it was all gone."
>Her mane pets transition into back-rubs.
>You sigh contentedly.
"S-sorry, that just feels really nice."
>"No worries, I have no idea how tense you could possibly be."
>It takes a few minutes of silence before she starts talking again.
>"If I warned them, they would've all been doomed instantly. It was already primed."
>"I had set up emergency protocol for Ponyville, but only my closest friends knew the secret codes."
>"I had accepted that I couldn't save everypony now, but maybe with the power of the Elements I could revert everything."
>"It truly was a gorgeous day, and that would be our downfall."
>"Rarity was working on a dress outside because of how beautiful it was and failed to hear my remote triggering of her kettle."
>"Applejack was with her sister and her close friends teaching them about edible plants, the bell ringing out my pattern went unheard."
>"Fluttershy was off in Manehattan getting a rare food for her animals, the carrier pigeon probably just pecked at her door for a while."

>>220366
This but "Mein Fürher" instead of "fearless leader"

>>220392
Forgot roll [1d100 = 78]

>>220391
>"Rainbow Dash was working. I don't know why I expected her to care enough about my constant warnings to put on her alert transponder, but she didn't."
>"I have no idea what Pinkie was doing, and now I never will. I had just enough time to rush back here and seal myself and Owlowiscious in before enabling the stasis-field. I can't say I know that they were all vaporized painlessly, but I hope it was a mercy..."
>She pulls you closer to her and begins to cry gigantic tears into your neck.
"It wasn't your fault Twilight, please don't blame yourself..."
>"I'm the only one who's fault it was. But now you know that you're lying in Ponyville right now, I... I just happen to be the only thing left."
>You scootch your body around.
"It wasn't your fault, you need to accept that or it's going to eat you up inside. That's what happened to my Twilight, and I never ever want to see it happen to anybody again."
>"You're a noble filly, Celestia I haven't even asked you what your name is. What is it?"
"Anonymous."
>"That's an interesting name for a filly."
"I'm not really a filly."
>She gives you a bit more of that sweet laugh.
>You had forgotten how much you missed it from your own mom...
>Your real one, back on earth.
>Oh god, you're forgetting her face...
>You'll never see her again, you'll never see anyone you ever knew from Earth ever again...
>You let out a few sobs of your own.
>"What's wrong?"
"I wasn't kidding Twilight, I'm not really a filly. Promise not to laugh?"
>"I swear it on my own life in the absence of my monarchs."
>Be Little League.
>Anon is freaking out.
>"You're dead. You're dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. Dead. DEAD. DEAD. DEAD. DEAD. DEAD! DEAD! DEAD! DEAD!"
>Twilight, ever the responsible foalsitter, left her here in her clearly damaged state to go get some sedatives.
>You've tried to go over to comfort her, but she just swats at you and makes this weird reeing noise.
>You're really worried about her...
>You don't know what you'd do if she weren't here.
>"Sleepy time."
>A dart appears on Anon's neck and she looks behind you in shock before passing out.
>"I'm sorry that took so long, I had to load this thing."
"You were this close to hitting me."
>You hold up your hooves, emphasizing the distance.
"Thiiiiis close."
>"But I didn't hit you, did I?"
"Well, no-"
>"Then shut the fuck up."
>You comply.
>"...Okay, I spoke too soon. I need you to tell me exactly how you got into the Everfree, and exactly how you lost sight of Clover, or Celestia dammit there will cease to be a Little League!"
>You're fricked.

>>220392
>>220393
For splitting up my posts, I'm afraid both of you will have to die. Prepare for impact.

>>220395
>both of you
Jokes on you, i'm one person!

>>220387
Where the fuck is the 'get physically, psychologically and sexually abused by Twilight' option?

>>220399
I think you mean mommy issues, Straya.

>>220399
>>220402
There is a very big overlap here

>>220394
Great work. I'd like to say things are making more sense, but there's still so much unanswered.

>>220394
Unsure exactly what is going on, but I am interested in where it is going. ty4gren

Why is filly such a cute?

>>220445
Cute from the front, lewd from the back

>>220445
>>220447
Now that makes me want a version of that gif from a back view.

>>220445
Because ponies are cute.

>>220445
Because the filly is (You).

>>220459
B-but I'm not cute like filly is!

>>220460
This sign I made for you says otherwise.

>>220461
n-no u

>>220461
oh yeah? Well I got a sign too! T-take that! F-f-faggot...

>>220461
>Wanting to cuddle with another dude who also got turned into a filly
What are you, gay?

>>220464
Take it, I shall.

>>220465
*shrugs*

>>220387
>Still no actual option to let the filly pee in my mouth
>Instead has essentially duplicate options for either peeing in filly's mouth or producing the pee for a filly's mouth

No.

aaaAAAAAaaaaaaaaa

>>220484
The Gay, The Fag, and The Purple

Where is everybody? It's Saturday night.

>>220497
arguing with a friend about whether the Pillar of Autumn's crash in Halo was a victory or a defeat

>>220497
Filly is asleep, it's past her bedtime.

>>220499
It ultimately lead to the destruction of Installation 04, so I would call that a victory for the UNSC.

>>220501
Yes, but the initial battle leading to the ship's crash was a covenant space victory for sure

>>220503
This. The crash itself was a defeat, but the Chief was able to turn it into a giant fuck you and, ultimately, a victory.

>>220503
>>220504
Both of these.

>>220501
>>220504
>>220505
now then, a question for you all...
https://strawpoll.com/4ezyd272

>>220506
Where the hell is Reach?

>>220508
shit, I forgot

gimme a sec

>>220506
No Halo Wars/Halo Wars 2?

https://strawpoll.com/9aw1kzrr
better link to better poll
>>220507
got steam? You'll be in luck soon™.
>>220510
I imagine an RTS game wouldn't be the best game to introduce someone to a franchise mainly made of FPS games.

>>220511
but reading doesn't let you put a shotgun to an elite's head and tbag his corpse

>>220512
I do... not gonna post it here though, I doubt I'd be able to distinguish your requests from all the fags from Russia that message me about my tf2 items.

>>220515
>russians messaging about tf2 items
same, I've got a bunch of items worth real money and I get a friend request almost every day from some random looking to scam me or introduce me to some gambling site. I just ignore them all at this point.

>>220499
The Pillar of Autumn manages to take out like 4 Covenant cruisers before being disabled. That’s a victory if ever there were more one.

>>220506
The second halo tries to make the group that’s been geocoding the human race for two and a half decades, and has halfway succeeded in it, into good guys. Then the third one more or less takes the position that they are your definite allies and you don’t fight them. I don’t think so. CE or Reach. Maybe ODST

>>220517
Definitely CE or Reach. Reach probably wins out in the end because you're fighting against impossible odds to try to save a planet from genocide and glassing. ODST is alright but you don't see the glassing until the very end, and the qt Engineers kinda ruin the whole "xenophobia" angle.

All this talk brings back memories of me as a kid playing CE and beating the ever living hell out of dead Elites with the butt of my assault rifle to make the ground underneath them a solid dark purple.

>>220517
>taking out 4 cruisers means victory
The Autumn may have taken out 4 cruisers before going down, but it still went up against an entire fleet before going down. It was certainly badass, but it wasn't a victory since the covvies still very clearly held space control.
>the second bit
It wasn't making them all into good guys, just the ones that the rest of them decided to turn on. Even then, if you can find your way to some NPC marines in 2 while playing as Arby, they will still shoot you and you'll still have the red reticule. 3's alliance wasn't one of choice, it was one of circumstance; the sangheili and humanity had to ally if either species wanted to survive the wrath of the covenant.

>>220519
Yeah but the series still clearly wants to paint the Sangheili as good, and even if they try to make the humans of Halo 3 understandably reticent to accept an alliance, it still leaves the main elites as “noble” and “honorable,” despite the fact that that race in particular did the grunt work of the human genocide. The series concedes to realism for the humans in the setting and their motivation, but still tells the viewer “these aliens that murder women and children en masse are good.” Halo 5 takes this to its extreme by equating dead Elite loyalists to UNSC explicitly (even though this game features ‘bad’ elites).

The marines on Sacred Icon auto-die if you get close enough to engage them, the game obviously didn’t want its Elite protagonist to be seen killing humans, though he killed at least 7 planets worth in other materials.

>>220516
Yeah, kek. All I really have that they're interested in is this one shitty sniper unusual I have I think.
I also have a really fucking busted Sydney Sleeper that I'm sure they're into for... different reasons than I am.

>>220520
I agree the result of the alliance could've been handled better, don't get me wrong, but neither species were in any position to do anything to the other after the war seeing as humanity had to rebuild pretty much from the ground up and every other sentient species had to deal with the power vacuum left by truth's death and the covenant's disbanding. H5 did make things worse too, but I'm pretty sure nobody would bother defending 5's story, so I'm not even touching that.

>>220521
what's busted about your sleeper? also, what unusual?

>>220520
One other thing that I forgot, there is actually a way to save those marines on Sacred Icon that involves grenade jumping, this guy made a good video showing the process.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kVUaIKN4_9s

>>220522
Disco Beat Down Archer's Sterling.

>>220524
That's actually a pretty good effect. Nice collector's sleeper, btw.

>>220525
Thanks. I wish I could say I made it myself, but I just ended up getting lucky in an auction on scrap. The least edgy name on any of my rifles, kek. The other two are "If You're reading this, It's too late." and "Natural Selection."
I didn't even know the first one was a shitty fucking album until some autist told me, I felt really creative for coming up with that one.

>>220526
nice names, the only thing I'd name a rifle is probably "Sorry m8" with a description saying "I didn't know I'd actually hit you with that, my bad". Other than that, everything I have is either a pun or a reference none of which are very good.

>>220527
Hey, the only good puns are the absolutely fucking awful ones. In fact, that's probably why all puns are great.
And that ain't a bad name either.

>>220527
That's the kind of description I would put onto a Lucksman.

>>220528
My puns aren't bad enough to loop back to good, they're just bad.

>>220529
I agree, it would fit better on the lucksman, but the sad thing is I'm even worse with it than I am with regular rifles.

>>220521
>pee related unusual
>shitty
Filly, has no one here taught you the magic of diapees yet? I can send ya a sample sometime~

>>220532
>mistaking the power of Saxton Hale's specially-developed brand of Jarate™ jar-based karate for diaper fetish material
>mistaking a knight's helm for Saxton Hale's Jarate™ jar-based karate
>trying to indoctrinate another respectable person into your diaper cult
Piss off, wanka!

>>220533
>Piss off
That's the plan

>>220534
No! Bad filly.

>>220534
Filly really let herself go.

Is it legal to keep a small filly in your house as a pet, like a dog?

>>220575
Since fillies are not legally people...

>>220575
In Equestria? Probably not. Unless it's some kind of roleplay thing.

>>220577
>Some kind of roleplay thing
W-wew

>>220575
It's only illegal if you don't write the laws.

>>220579
You damn corrupt statist princesses!!

>>220577
So it's ok if filly is ok with it?
I'd better stock up on the premium filly treats.

>>220580
Twilight "I am the senate" Sparkle

wallpaper
very nice

>>220591
Badass filly.

>>220365

You contemplate a few ways to rebuke Twilight. A quick "facts don't care about your feelings" would make for a great edgy comeback. You could pull a Bugs Bunny and smooch her out of nowhere before dropping truth bombs left and right to your new audience. Hell, you could even just finish your sentence to be a complete butt about things.

The one question this raises, however, is whether or not it would be worth it. You have very few friends at the moment, and if you burned your bridges right now for a good laugh, it would be very easy to make you disappear. Hell, most people wouldn't care about you because you were some stupid racist who just happened to be cute. In fact, now that you think about it, the very neoliberals who you would love to dunk on might even see fit to punish you by sending you to a Bill Clinton rape island. You do not want to go to a Bill Clinton rape island.

Reluctantly, you lower your head, and in a defeated tone say, "Sorry Diana. What's the plan?"

Your apology brings a warm smile to her face. You must be on her good side or something.

"It's simple, Anon. We sit down at the table, we have our breakfast, and we answer some questions for our new adoring fans. Just keep things PG, yeah? We're guests at NDSU for the moment, so we might as well be on our best behavior, yeah? And if you feel uncomfortable, you can always get these people to line up and ask one at a time instead of crowding around us. Would that make things easier for you?"

>>220595
"On one condition: These people aren't literal children. I'm pretty sure they can handle things above PG and be just fine. We'll tune it down on the redpills, but we won't sugarcoat anything. And yes, an orderly line would help greatly."
[1d100 = 42]

>>220599
>Flutterbutter
Reeeeeeeeee ASSFAGGOT I know that's you you traitor, you aren't allowed more than one momfu!!!!!!!

>>220595
"PG-13" combine with >>220600 , and hold out a hoof to Twilight to shake on it.
[1d100 = 19]

>>220610
Only if we spit on our hoof like a good respectable straya man
No wait we're murkan, ask if we can go to a gun store while wildly waving our tail excitedly
[1d100 = 75]

>>220610
>>220612
Boosting this wonderful combination of posts.
[1d100 = 33]

>>220616
Man knows what he's talkin' about. Plus you know that she'd totally go along with filly's secret desire to be treated as a foal

>>220595
Well the writer keeps nudging us this way so fuck it, whatever. Lead the way, grape kool aid.
[1d100 = 64]

>>220599
Just realized. >"Halloween"
Don't you mean >Nightmare Night

>>220599
Fuck, maybe I should just leave the incognito window permanently open, I'm sick of forgetting to namefag. I am a faggot after all.

>>220607
>2019
>not wanting lesbian horse moms
What are you, gay?

>>220616
Well, she'd make *some* mistakes

>>220642
That card would actually be fine as long as you leave it out to dry completely before plugging it back in.

>>220616
Yellow quiet's skin makes the best filly blanket.

>>220646
Delet this right now! Filly would never hurt her momfu!

>>220646
Can't unsee

>>220646
Does filly also enjoy baking cupcakes?

>>220648
Calm yer crotchtits. Filly was making Shy, not unmaking her.

>>220652
Forgot to attach proof of Filly's hard work.

>>220652
Th-that's a big Flutters...

>>220652
T-t-thats a big horse

>>220652
>>220654
>>220661
Good, momfus need to be big for optimal snuggles and to check under the bed for monsters

>>220662
I want Fluttermom to cradle me in her wings and make me feel warm, safe, and loved