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wickid ponkin.png
Let's make our own version of the Horst-Wessel Lied! (Horse-Wessel Lied?)
Anonymous
52d236e
?
No.355939
356011 356063 356101
Not sure if it's been done before, but seeing how every country in the world basically has their own version of the Horst-Wessel Lied song (see below):
https://www.bitchute.com/video/EMVjJVyhavpF/
https://www.bitchute.com/video/5lrbV3pcqR9i/
I thought, why don't we make one of our own?

I've got the instrumental ready to download, and I've got a draft of the lyrics. I hope you guys would be able to give some input on how to make it better suited to the Equestrian context.
Here's what I got so far:

>Raise up your flags and stand as one together,
>Our Guards will march with sturdy iron gaits.
>𝄆 Join in our song, for if our foes would seek to stop us,
>We’ll fight as one to save the Pony state! 𝄇

>Equestrian blood of our Equestrian spirit
>Emblazoned by our Sun and crescent Moon,
>𝄆 Her sacred flag brings hope to our pony millions;
>Freedom and bread, our day is coming soon! 𝄇

>At last the call to struggle finally ending
>Flushed with the fight, we proudly hail the dawn!
>𝄆 Behold our flag is waving proudly in the bright skies,
>Triumphant standards of a race reborn! 𝄇

Thoughts?
Anonymous
c107edd
?
No.356011
356023
>>355939
I like it. I might substitute "Friendship" for "Freedom," since it's a more central theme.
Anonymous
52d236e
?
No.356023
356024
>>356011
Oh, that sounds far better!
Any idea on how to make that last verse more pony-centric, lyric wise?
Anonymous
a234182
?
No.356024
356040
>>356023
Saying something specific to ponies like "We have four hooves" would be too easy.
Something could be said to be "galloping" on?
Anonymous
23c6af8
?
No.356040
356041
>>356024
>Something could be said to be "galloping" on
I'm not sure how to fit that into the last verse, unfortunately.
You might have to do a bit more heavy lifting here.
Anonymous
a234182
?
No.356041
356042 356063
>>356040
>Our flag raised high in bright skies, we gallop on,
>Triumphant standards of a race reborn! 𝄇
I tried
Anonymous
a234182
?
No.356042
>>356041
A pun could be worked in about "raising our standards" because we're done tolerating our enemy's shit and settling for mediocrity/degeneracy
Anonymous
52d236e
?
No.356063
>>355939
Alright so, an idea for the second verse:
>𝄆 Her sacred flag brings hope to our pony millions,
>Friendship and food, shall we deliver soon! 𝄇

And trying something with the suggestion from >>356041 here:
>𝄆 We gallop on/forth, our banners waving/flutter in the bright skies,
>Triumphant standards of a race reborn! 𝄇

I might have more alternate ideas for these, but for now, I think I'll put these in unless someone can suggest a better alteration to these lyrics.
Anonymous
52d236e
?
No.356101
356103
>>355939
So a quick recap as to how the song's lyrics have been modified from the first draft, for those of you keeping track:

>Raise up your flags and stand as one together,
>Our Guards will march with sturdy iron gaits.
>𝄆 Join in our song, for if our foes would seek to stop us,
>We’ll fight as one to save the Pony state! 𝄇

>Equestrian blood of our Equestrian spirit
>Emblazoned by our Sun and crescent Moon,
>𝄆 Her sacred flag brings hope to our pony millions,
>Friendship and food, we shall deliver soon! 𝄇

>At last the call to struggle finally ending
>Flushed with the fight, we proudly hail the dawn!
>𝄆 We gallop on, our banners waving in the bright skies,
>Triumphant standards of our race reborn! 𝄇
Anonymous
ec55cb2
?
No.356103
356106
>>356101
It is really hard to follow the song and text together, but a few things..

>We’ll fight as one to save the Pony state! 𝄇
Perhaps change "Pony state" to "Pony Land"

>Emblazoned by our Sun and crescent Moon,
I tried to sing along with "crescent Moon" but it felt like if you skipped "crescent" if was easier to sing (but this was part where listening to the singing and trying to insert new text was hard).

>𝄆 We gallop on, our banners waving in the bright skies,
This was another line I was unable to sing new text to so no idea what would be good.

Sorry for not being able to bring more to the table. But overall the text looks good.
Anonymous
52d236e
?
No.356106
>>356103
Thanks.
Hmm... perhaps I should record a demo later and post it here. Of course, I'll need some help picking which one of the instrumentals on this list are best too:
Official: https://ia601408.us.archive.org/35/items/das-horst-wessel-lied-die-fahne-hoch-the-biggest-archive-ever/Horst%20Wessel%20Lied%20-%20Biggest%20Archive/Horst%20Wessel%20Lied%20%28Official%20Instrumental%29.mp3
Golden Dawn version: https://ia801408.us.archive.org/35/items/das-horst-wessel-lied-die-fahne-hoch-the-biggest-archive-ever/Horst%20Wessel%20Lied%20-%20Biggest%20Archive/Horst%20Wessel%20Lied%20%28Greek%20Instrumental%29.mp3
Ebig version: https://ia801408.us.archive.org/35/items/das-horst-wessel-lied-die-fahne-hoch-the-biggest-archive-ever/Horst%20Wessel%20Lied%20-%20Biggest%20Archive/Horst%20Wessel%20Lied%20%28Remake%20Instrumnetal%29%20%5BD%20Minor%5D.mp3
Rock version: https://ia801408.us.archive.org/35/items/das-horst-wessel-lied-die-fahne-hoch-the-biggest-archive-ever/Wolfenstein%203D%20Song%20%28Instrumental%20by%20Zelea%20Music%29.mp3

>Perhaps change "Pony state" to "Pony Land"
I might also need to find a line above that to rhyme too, really.